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Chapter 8: I Believe I Can Fly
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It was the morning of the much anticipated flying lessons when a fleet of five owls, led by Aderyn, swept down upon the Ravenclaw table carrying a large box between them, "It's here!" Tosh cried out eagerly.
Everyone turned to stare.
"YES!" Jack cheered, quickly leaping up from his seat and the Slytherin table. He and Ianto were both at Tosh's side in an instant, to help her unwrap the package the owls had delivered.
Most of Ravenclaw house gathered around as well, eagerly peering to see what Tosh had got. The box contained an old laptop in its original packaging- well, old by their standards, it was brand new in this year- a Torchwood-labelled set of tools for working on tech in general... and Jack's wrist strap, which he had left at his old apartment when Ianto had told him magic was supposed to ruin all technology it got into.
"I missed you my love!" Jack cheered, snatching the wrist strap and putting it on, tightening it significantly further than he was used to, so that it fit on his wrist now, "Never let you go again, my Precious!" he joked, petting the wrist strap and earning a round of bemused snickering from a few students.
Ianto rolled his eyes, "That's just pathetic, Jack." he laughed, "I'm sure Sauron and Gollum will show up at any minute to demand retribution for copyright infringements, and all."
"What is that?" Roger Davies asked.
"Muggle toy." Jack said dismissively.
"When Jack Harkness says 'toy'..." Owen put in innocently, from somewhere beyond the crowd of Ravenclaws.
Ianto sighed, "I will learn that silencing spell, Owen!" he called out clearly, not bothering to look for him through the crowd.
Jack, however, was frowning now, "There's a message..." he whispered to Ianto, eyeing the wrist strap warily. He looked up to see that both Ianto and Tosh had heard him, and they now nodded. Tosh gathered up her toolkit, and looked around at the other Ravenclaws, "Could you guys help me take this up to the tower?" she asked hopefully.
While she was distracting the crowd, Jack and Ianto slipped off unnoticed, into an empty classroom, and as soon as they were certain that they were alone Jack pressed the play button on his wrist strap.
"Okay, you probably haven't got the owls by the time I sent this..." Jack's own voice- his past-self- said, as the hologram flickered to life before them, "But I just got a letter from Hogwarts. A Professor R. J. Lupin. I know I'm not good with authority figures, but this is ridiculous! Two days and the teacher's asking quite frankly weird questions."
"It could have been worse..." Ianto muttered.
"It could have been John." Jack agreed.
"'Dear Mr Harkness'- you need to correct them on this, I'll only answer to Captain in future-"
"Anyone tell you you used to be insufferably arrogant?" Ianto asked too innocently.
"I still am." Jack answered, smirking.
"'I am writing to inform you that your son'- have I mentioned that cover story is creepy? Seriously, it bothers me-"
"Why?" Ianto asked, curiously.
"Because I'd not be averse to taking the phrase 'go fuck yourself' literally, maybe." Jack answered idly, pretending not to notice the way Ianto pulled a face at that.
"'-inform you that your son suffered a serious reaction to the presence of a Dementor.' Blah blah blah, tells me what a Dementor is, I assume you already know that- and I don't like them, by the way- then it asks me if anything may have happened to you that could have caused such a traumatic memory." the hologram snorted, "Does he expect a full list? Or should I just deny everything?"
Jack rolled his eyes as the holo-message flickered off, and he pressed the button to call back to the original sender.
"Hello?" Jack's past-self appeared on the hologram once more, "Oh... right." he stared at Jack, "Well, you got my message, then?"
"Deny everything." Jack said, grinning, "Except... um..." he glanced at Ianto for a second, "Tell him I was kidnapped once... tortured and saw my best friend murdered."
"Oh... that. I was trying to repress that." the hologram complained, shuddering slightly, "You want me to make it contemporary, I'm assuming?"
"Of course... real names... but give the guilty party a human face."
"Anyone in particular?" the hologram asked.
Jack rolled his eyes, "Um... make him look like our ex-partner. It's not ideal, but we need to get our stories perfectly straight."
"Gotcha." the hologram nodded, "God, which variation of him should I use? He always was good at blending in when he tried... I especially liked when he wore that Roman Imperial uniform..."
Jack snorted, "Let's go with the one and only time he ever wore a suit."
The hologram grinned slowly, "Oh yeah... wasn't that to a murder trial? It did look good on him..."
"Jack..." Jack warned the hologram darkly.
"What?" his past-self protested in all false innocence, "I was just thinking..."
"Try not to." Jack laughed, shaking his head, "But please do write back to that teacher... he could be a nuisance if he thinks we're hiding something."
"What could he possibly think we're hiding?" the hologram asked, "Besides the fact you're a time-travelling immortal who probably shouldn't be allowed near children..."
"Just because you don't know how to behave in civilised company right now, doesn't mean I can't." Jack sniped at his past self, grinning even as he said this, "But if we don't give him some acceptable story, what sort of traumatic memories do you think he might guess at? Especially given your last statement."
The hologram stared for all of two seconds, then blinked, "You don't think this guy- I mean, his writing makes him sound really meek and proper and, well, decent- you don't think he'd seriously jump to the conclusion that... I would have hurt you?"
"That's exactly what I think." Jack said darkly, "So write to him with that story, yeah?"
The hologram nodded slowly, frowning now, "Sure, I will." but then he dropped the dour mood rather sharply, "You guys having fun there? Tosh sounded like she was enjoying herself."
"Yeah, so far it's been pretty good, except for the Dementors." Jack said, brightening up significantly.
"What did they make you remember?" the hologram asked.
"It hasn't happened yet." Jack answered with a frown, before taking a deep breath and dismissing the entire conversation, "I'll call again later." and with that he turned off the wrist strap.
"You were kidnapped and tortured?" Ianto asked softly, stunned by this revelation.
"Yeah... I ran headlong into danger and was stupid enough to lead a friend with me." Jack said quietly, "I was fifteen at the time... they weren't human, but I... like my past self said, I try to repress it." he looked up to meet Ianto's concerned gaze, and shook his head, "It's alright now, I'm over it. Honestly."
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The flying lesson for Gryffindor and Slytherin was outside in the courtyard. It was a cold day, with a chill on the wind that ripped right through even their warmest clothes. Still, no one was put out enough by it to want to miss this.
Jack Harkness had flown spaceships of every variety he'd been able to get his hands on in his home time, fighter planes in World War II, and once on a mission with the Agency he had landed a jumbo jet after the pilot had been murdered. Since his first death, he had tried everything from bungee jumping and parachuting... to leaping off bridges and buildings- and even out of a plane once- without anything to break his fall, just to try to get a cheap thrill out of it.
None of these things had prepared him for learning to fly a broomstick.
First of all you had to convince the thing that it should let you ride it. You needed the magic and the will to command it to fly into your hand, simply by standing next to it, holding your hand over it and saying "Up."
The first time he tried it, the broomstick he had chosen rolled over and didn't show any inclination to leave the ground at all.
Owen's didn't move at all, but that didn't stop the underage medic from doubling over, almost literally rolling on the grass laughing at Jack, "Expected better from you! It just rolled over and went to sleep!" he cackled.
Jack kicked him in the ribs when the teacher wasn't looking, and tried again, this time using his best, 'you know you love me now do what I tell you' tone, "Up." The broomstick responded immediately, and Jack grinned smugly as Owen failed twice more to get any reaction whatsoever from his own broomstick.
Gwen got hers to work after a few more tries, when she started to use her 'I'm getting pissed off and I own a gun' voice.
Owen continued to fail until he started swearing at it. The teacher- a strict woman named Madam Hooch, with short grey hair and creepy catlike eyes- wasn't pleased, "Mr Harper, kindly watch your language! Two points from Gryffindor!"
"But it wasn't working before I called it a-!" Owen protested, but was interrupted by the teacher.
"Five points from Gryffindor, Mr Harper!" the teacher said coldly, before scanning the rest of the students. Everyone else had succeeded in this stage of the lesson, long before Owen... and several Slytherins were snickering at Owen's predicament.
The teacher then spent the next ten minutes explaining how to properly mount a broomstick. In spite of her choice of words, no one laughed, not even Owen. He was determined not to lose any more points or make any more of an ass of himself than he had done already. Jack found the entire thing quite completely hilarious, but for the most part managed to keep a straight face as the teacher talked about grip and position.
Finally, it seemed that everyone was ready to actually try to take off. "Alright, everyone!" she called to get the attention of some of the Gryffindor boys who had been avidly ignoring her while she'd been correcting Gwen and Avery on their posture, "When I blow my whistle, you kick off from the ground, hard. Keep your brooms steady, rise a few feet and then come straight back down by leaning forward slightly. On my whistle, now. Three, two, one." the whistle blew and everyone tried to push off from the ground.
It's an odd sensation to feel the ground fall away from your feet with no evident logical means of support. Jack instinctively gripped a little tighter, and wavered in the air slightly before finding his balance.
Gwen yelped and fell over onto the ground, from less than a foot into the air. Owen nearly followed suit, but just managed to hold on by flattening himself to the broomstick and clinging on for dear life. Elaine Gibbon seemed equally unable to keep her balance, but had a better grip than Gwen, rolling over and hovering upside down with her head about two feet from the grass.
Deciding not to push his luck and go higher, Jack leaned forward and by putting weight on his hands the broom took the instruction to fly downwards... a bit faster than he'd expected. He only just caught it in time to land on his feet, instead of a nosedive that might have broken the broomstick... or his face.
Only one student didn't seem to be having any trouble at all. Demelza Robins was a natural, like a bird. Even Mark Avery, who claimed to have been flying since he was five, didn't seem to be doing too well with the school brooms... although he wasn't any worse than Jack.
It took half an hour for them to be allowed to try simple turns, and even when given permission, Owen refused to go more then four feet off the ground. Jack stayed close to the ground too... but only to literally fly circles around Owen.
Gwen was still mastering the art of flying in a straight line while Jack had started trying to figure out how to do a loop-the-loop, every time the teacher turned her back to yell at Demelza and Avery, who had started getting competitive, each deciding they could and would fly higher than the other.
By the end of the lesson, both houses had lost twelve points, even. Avery had won the aerial contest, only because Demelza hadn't wanted to lose any more points... thus making up for Owen's earlier behaviour... relatively speaking.
It really had been the most fun Jack had had since they'd arrived at Hogwarts.
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As they walked back up to the castle, Gwen and Owen chatted brightly about Tosh's project and how useful it could be to them, while Jack's mind wandered. It wandered very specifically in the direction of Ianto Jones, who had just passed them on his way out of the great hall. Jack left the other two, and followed him.
He succeeded in cornering Ianto in a deserted hallway leading down to the dungeons and kitchens. "Hey, handsome." Jack murmured behind him, causing him to jump with surprise, and drop the books he had been carrying.
"Jack! You, uh... startled me." Ianto said quickly. He turned to pick up his books, but Jack caught him and pushed him back against the wall, leaning against him, kissing his neck.
To hell with the fact he looked like a child, Jack Harkness was not used to, nor did he enjoy, being deprived of intimate physical contact for any length of time... and he hadn't had anything of the sort since they had woken up as children. For Jack, that was a very long time to go without.
But then Ianto's hands were on his shoulders, pushing him away, and he reluctantly backed off a bit, "You cannot be serious, Jack." he said, very defensively, "I look like I'm twelve... at best!"
"So?" Jack asked blankly, not seeing the problem here, "I know you're not."
"We're in the middle of a corridor... anyone could walk by at any moment." Ianto protested.
Jack glanced along the corridor, "Good point." he conceded.
"Don't you dare suggest we go somewhere more private, Jack!" Ianto snapped, "Even if you can ignore the fact I look like a child, I can't ignore what you look like right now."
But even as he spoke, Jack was picking up the books from the floor and then taking Ianto's hand... Ianto hated how easily he succumbed to Jack's will, and followed him. There was some silent allure about him that Ianto just couldn't resist... and before he knew it, they were alone in a dungeon classroom two corridors away from the Potions labs.
"Jack..." Ianto said, trying to sound warning but ending up sounding almost afraid.
Jack sighed, setting the books down on a desk in front of Ianto, and then leaning across said desk to face him, "I need you, Ianto."
Ianto's brow furrowed slightly at these words, but he didn't respond, warily picking up the books and holding them against his chest defensively.
"I'm not asking you to fuck me, god that would be weird..." Jack hesitated with a slight frown, before laughing, "If we stay like this, I won't even hit puberty for another year or so." he shook his head, "No... I just need to be near you."
"I... don't understand." Ianto said, no longer wary, setting the books back down again and watching as Jack circled the desk to stand right in front of him.
"Your scent..." he shivered slightly as Jack leaned closer to his neck and inhaled noticeably, "Your touch..." a hand ran lightly down the side of Ianto's face, "The taste of your skin..." Jack kissed his neck lightly, and he shivered. It felt good... Jack always felt right to him. He felt Jack's lips curl into a smile against his neck before he heard the words, "Completely innocent, honest."
That made Ianto laugh weakly, "Yes, innocent." he said sarcastically.
Jack grinned, leaning back against the desk and looking up to meet Ianto's eyes now, "You don't like this idea? I promise I'll stay above the belt."
"It's still a terrible idea!" Ianto laughed, "But I do like it."
"Why is it terrible?" Jack asked, sounding upset, and mock-pouting at him. It looked cute in the genuinely innocent way that made Ianto feel like a truly terrible person for actually liking his suggestion.
"Because we're bound to get caught..." Ianto admitted, "And because it makes me feel like we need to go find Owen so he can resurrect the paedophile joke."
Jack smirked, "But you still want me."
Ianto shuddered slightly, absolutely certain that Jack was perfectly capable of projecting lust, desire, or possibly some kind of intoxicating pheromones at will... he only fought very briefly with his conscience, before stepping forward and kissing Jack, himself... very lightly, on the lips.
Jack's hand ran up the side of his neck and into his hair, pulling him closer...
But then all of a sudden they were both drenched in icy cold water, causing them to jump apart in shock. Jack fell back against the desk, while Ianto stumbled into a nearby chair, tripped over said chair and landed on the ground on his backside.
Gleefully malicious cackling echoed through the room, and Peeves the poltergeist lobbed another water balloon at them before zooming out through an air-vent and away. The laughter echoed through the room for a few seconds, before Ianto finally shook his head like a dog that'd been swimming, throwing cold water out of his hair in all directions.
"I'm going to kill him." Ianto hissed, staring at the air-vent, "I don't care if he's already dead... I'll still kill him."
Jack laughed, pushing his wet hair back out of his face with one hand, "We should count ourselves lucky, I don't think he cares what we were doing before he got us."
Ianto glanced at Jack, "Revenge?"
"Oh yes."
Now, unlike the vague rumours they had heard about Gryffindor vengeance, which usually involved fighting fire with fire when it came to Peeves, Jack and Ianto worked in more methodical ways. After rushing to the great hall and begging the first teacher they saw- which happened to be Professor Lupin- to cast a drying charm on their schoolbooks before they were ruined, they then set about finding a way to deal with the poltergeist.
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Ianto remembered his first day, when Mr Flich had expressed great dislike for the poltergeist, and set about attempting to make an alliance with the man. He was shocked to discover that it took him several days to find out the location of the man's office. No one knew where it was, or perhaps they simply didn't want to tell him. It seemed that no one believed any sane being would actively seek out Mr Filch.
Eventually, however, he got the information out of a thoroughly confused Cedric Diggory, and made his way to that location. Parchment on the door showed a long list of items forbidden within the castle grounds, and another sign half-hidden by this list did identify the room as the office of a Mr Argus Filch.
Ianto read the list for a moment, noticing some magical variations on the classics, like 'dungbombs' and 'batty boomerangs', before cautiously rapping on the door.
It was wrenched open suddenly, and the incredibly angry-looking visage of Mr Filch loomed over him, "What d'you want?" he demanded.
"I was told I could get a list of school rules from your office, sir?" Ianto asked innocently. This was true, Diggory had told him this.
Filch's eyes narrowed at this request, "What d'you lot care about rules, anyway?"
Ianto hesitated for half a second in the face of this man's pure malice, but then quickly answered, "I like rules, sir. And I'm sure if I had the list I could keep some of my friends in line as well." he honestly meant this, thinking specifically of Owen as he said that last part. Filch eyed him suspiciously for a few moments, then beckoned him into the office.
Ianto warily followed, and found himself surrounded by ranks of filing cabinets, some stuffed to overflowing with folders... especially the one on the far right.
While most of the others were labelled with letters, 'A-Bi', 'Bl-Ca', 'Ce-Da', etc... of the four drawers of this cabinet, two were marked as 'Weasley, Fred' and two 'Weasley, George'. He also noticed three other drawers with individual names 'Black, Sirius', 'Jones, Gwenog' and 'Potter, James', but neither one was as bad as the 'Weasley' section, which was literally overflowing an entire filing cabinet unto itself.
Every instinct Ianto had told him this place needed to be re-filed and re-organised, but he didn't dare comment. He also decided it was probably in his best interests not to tell Filch his last name... given the fact that his cousin's name- second cousin twice removed- was on one of those drawers, and he got the distinct feeling they weren't full of awards for good behaviour.
While Filch rooted through a drawer at his desk, Ianto felt something nudge his leg, and looked down to see Filch's cat, tail aloft, rubbing her head against his shin. He stared at her for a moment and she jumped up onto the desk, sitting as close to her master as possible, and purring.
Filch pulled out a roll of parchment from the drawer, and shoved it roughly in Ianto's direction, "School rules, banned products, list of punishments for misbehaviour, all here." he announced, sounding especially proud of that last part.
"Thank you, sir." Ianto said, taking the parchment.
Filch eyed him with even more suspicion, now, "You were one of them boys that Peeves got with erasers, first day?"
"Well, sort of, sir. He didn't actually hit me with them." Ianto said nervously, "Can't say he made any friends with that stunt, though."
"Well don't you be goin' trying to fight back like those Weasley boys, y'hear?" Filch ordered.
"Of course not, sir." Ianto said, glancing warily at the filing cabinet bearing that name.
"Yeah, those two're trouble-makers alright." Filch said darkly, following Ianto's gaze.
"Is there anything I can do to help against Peeves, sir?" Ianto asked cautiously, "Without breaking the rules, of course."
"You lookin' to snitch?" Filch asked, some hint of genuine hope filtering past his hateful glower.
"Well, I wouldn't want to get in any trouble." Ianto said, daring to smile faintly. "But he's certainly made an enemy of me."
Filch grinned, a sort of toothy grin, "You see that miscreant up to anything, you let me know about it, yeah?"
Ianto nodded, "Yeah."
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