Emi: Guess who's back...
Rasa: Back again...
Kori: I am back!
Emi: Burn a friend!
Kori: Wait, what!?
Rasa: AHHHHHH!
Kori: Emi! No!
One Choice: Chapter 7
When all the initiates stand on solid ground again, Lauren and Four lead us down a narrow tunnel. It is dark except for a few lanterns.
The Erudite boy in front of me stops abruptly, and I run into him.
"This is where we divide," Lauren says. "The Dauntless-born initiates are with me. I assume you don't need a tour."
She walks away and more than half of the initiates follow her, leaving only nine of us. I watch as they vanish into the shadows.
I look around at the other transfers. I am the only Abnegation and the only Amity never got off the train. The rest are Erudite and Candor.
Four clears his throat and we all look at him. "Most of the time I work in the control room, but for the next few weeks I will be your insructor. My name is Four."
Anzu asks,"Four? Like the number?"
Four looks at her. "Yes. Is there a problem?"
"No."
"Good. We'll be going to the Pit-"
Anzu snickers. "Clever name."
Four walks up to Anzu and leans his face close to hers. His eyes narrow and he just stares at her for a second.
"What is your name?" he asks quietly.
"Anzu," she squeaks.
"Well, Anzu, if I wanted to put up with Candor smart-mouths, I would have joined their faction,"he hisses. "Lesson number one: keep your mouth shut. Got that?"
She nods.
Four walks away and the initiates follow him slowly.
"What a jerk," Anzu mumbles.
"He probably just doesn't like getting laughed at," I shrug. I watch him and something about his stillness makes me wary.
We walk into "the Pit."
"Oh, I get it," Anzu whispers.
"Pit" is the best word for it. It is a cavern so huge I can't see the other side from where I stand, at the bottom. Uneven rock walls rise several stories above my head. Built into the stone walls are places for food, clothing, supplies and leisure activities. Narrow paths and steps carved from rock connect them. There are no rails to keep people from falling.
Panes of glass form the roof of the Pit. Blue lanterns dangle above the paths.
People in black are everywhere. A group of children run along a path. I want to scream at them to slow down before they get hurt. I remember the order of Abnegation. My stomach clenches but there is something wonderful about the chaos.
"If you'll follow me," Four says. "I'll show you the chasm."
He seems tame, by Dauntless standards, but as he turns around I see a tattoo peeking out from the collar of his shirt. He leads us to a darker part of the cavern, which thunders with the roar of water.
The floor drops off sharply. Gushing water strikes the wall beneath me and sprays upwards. To my left the water is calmer,but to my right it is white, battling against the rock.
"The chasm reminds us that there is a fine line between bravery and idiocy!" Four shouts."A daredevil jump off this ledge will end your life."
He leads the group through a hole in the wall into a brightly lit room. The dining we walk in, applause and shouting rings out. Anzu glances at me and smiles. I smile back.
Anzu and I find a mostly empty table and I end up wedged between her and Four. There is a platter of food I don't recognize: circular pieces of meat between slices of bread. I pinch one between my fingers, unsure what to make of it.
Four nudges me with his elbow.
"It's beef," he says. "Put this on it." He passes me a bowl of red sauce.
"You've never had a hamburger before?" Anzu asks, her eyes wide.
"Is that what it's called?" I reply.
"Stiffs eat plain food," Four says.
"Why?" she asks.
I shrug. "Extravagance is self-indulgent."
She smirks. "No wonder you left."
I roll my eyes, "Yeah. Because of the food."
The corner of Four's mouth twitches.
The cafeteria door opens again and a hush falls over the room. A young man walks in. His face is peirced many times and his hair is shoulder length and pink, which might have been a funny color if the coldness of his eyes didn't scare me so much.
"Who's that?" Anzu hisses.
"Zigfreid," says Four. "He's a Dauntless leader."
Zigfreid drops dowm on the other side of Four. "Well, aren't you going to introduce me?"
Four sighs almost inaudibly. "This is Ryou and Anzu."
"Ooh, a Stiff," Zigfreid smirks. "We'll see how long you last."
Words fail me. I want him to stop looking at me.
His fingers tap impatiently on the table. "What have you been doing lately, Four?"
Four lifts a shoulder. "Nothing much."
Are they friends? Everthing Zigfreid has done suggests they are, but Four is tense as a pulled wire. Maybe they're rivals. But how can that be when Zigfreid is a leader and Four is not.
"Pegasus still wants to meet with you,"Zigfreid says.
"You can tell him I'm satisfied with my current position," Four says.
"So he wants to give you a job." Zigfreid's eyes narrow the slightest bit. Maybe he sees Four as a threat to his job. My father says that those who want power and get it live in terror of losing it. That's why we have to give power to those who don't want it.
Four shrugs. "So it would seem."
"And you aren't interested?"
"I haven't been interested for two years."
"Well," says Zigfreid almost smugly. "Let's hope he gets the point." He claps Four a little too hard on the shoulder and walks away.
"Are you two...friends?" I ask Four as soon as Zigfreid is gone.
"We were in the same initiate class. He transfered from Erudite."
All thoughts of being careful around Four leave me. "Were you a transfer too?"
"I thought I would only have trouble with the Candor asking too many questions," he says coldly. "Now I've got Stiffs too?"
"It must be because you're so approachable," I say flatly. "You know like a bed of nails."
He stares at me, eyes narrowed, and I stare back. I know he isn't a dog, but the same rules apply. Looking away is submissive. Looking him in the eye is a challenge.
What will happen when the tension breaks?
But he gets up as someone at another table calls his name. "Careful, Ryou."
Four disappears without a word after dinner. Zigfreid leads us down a series of hallways. I have no idea why a Dauntless is responsible for a group of initiates, but maybe its just for tonight.
We walk in silence. No one told us to be quiet but none of us speak.
"For those of you who don't know, my name is Zigfreid. I am one of the five Dauntless leaders and I have volunteered to oversee your training," he says, stepping in front of a wooden door. "Some ground rules. Be in the training room by eight o'clock every day. Training is from eight to six, with a lunch break. After six you can do whatever you'd like. There will be time off between each stage of initiation"
Do whatever I like. In Abnegation, I had to put everyone else first. I don't even know what I like to do.
"Behind this door is where you'll be sleeping for the next few weeks. There are ten beds and only nine of you. We had anticipated that a higher percentage of you would make it this far."
"But we started with twelve," Anzu says. I try to nudge her, but she ignores me. She needs to learn to stay quiet.
"There's always at least one transfer who doesn't make it to the compound," he shrugs. "Anyway, at first we keep the transfers and Dauntless-born initiates seperate but that doesn't mean you are evaluated seperately. At the end, your rankings will be determined in comparison with the Dauntless-born initiates-"
"Rankings?" asks the tan Erudite boy next to me. "Why are we ranked?"
Zigfreid smiles wickedly. "The rankings serve two purposes," he says. "The first is to determine the order in which you will select a job after initiation. There are only a few desierable postitions available."
My stomach tightens. Something bad is going to happen.
"The second purpose," his grin widens. "Is that only the top ten initiates are made members."
I stiffen.
"What?" Christina says.
"Four initiates will be cut at the end of stage one the remainder after the final test."
Ten people will not become members.
I stare at Zigfreid's cruel smile.
My odds, as the smallest initiate, as the only Abnegation transfer, are not good.
"What if we're cut?" Keith asks.
Zigfreid shrugs. "You leave and live factionless."
The tan Erudite boy clamps his hand over his mouth and stiflesa sob. Another Erudite boy who looks a lot like him, though this one has spikier hair, puts a hand on his shoulder insome form of comfort.
I remember the factionless man, but instead of crying I feel colder, harder.
I will become a member.
"But that's not fair," Mai shouts. "If we had known-"
"Then what?" Zigfreid snaps. "You would never have chosen Dauntless? If thats the case, get out now."
He opens the door. "You chose us, now we have to choose you."
I lie in bed and listen to nine people breathing.
I have never slept in the same room as a girl before, but I have no other option except to sleep in the hallway. Everyone else changed into the Dauntless clothing that was provided, but I sleep my Abnegation clothes, which smell like home.
I am used to having my own room. I could see the lawn and the horizon. I slept in silence.
My vision blurs as I think of home and when I close my eyes, a tear slips out. I stifle a sob.
I can't cry. Not here, not now.
It will be fine. I can befriend Anzu, let my hair grow and look at my reflection.
The tears come faster, wetting my cheeks.
It doesn't matter that I may never see my family again. It doesn't matter how much I ache at the memory of my family. It doesn't matter. The flow of tears stem as I calm down.
A strangled sound, followed by a heavy sob, interrupts the breathing. A pillow muffles it, but not enough. They come from a Candor boy, Joey, the toughest looking of all the initiates. He is the last person I expect to break down.
He is in the bunk next to mine. I could reach over and comfort him. Instead I feel disgusted. Someone who looks so strong shouldn't act so weak. Why can't he keep his crying quiet like the rest of us?
I swallow hard. I roll over and grit my teeth.
This is why I can't go home. I wouldn't belong among those people who care without trying. I gather my pillow around my ears to block out Joeys crying and fall asleep with a circle of moisture pressed against my cheek.
