Abril watched with both happiness and sadness as the Viking ships sailed down the river away from her home. She was happy for things would be restored to the norm, and sad because being in this camp was her first and only adventure. But, adventure or not, she hoped they were sailing away once and for all for she knew that if they came back she might not be so lucky to have the freedom to go home she was given this time; Ragnar's last words to her kept playing over and over in her head.
Abril was broken from her thoughts upon hearing her father declaring war eternal of Ragnar Lothbrok. She looked at him for a brief moment to see the look of pure loathing and hatred painted across his face. She knew that her father would stop at nothing now and that although he was a bit of a coward, he would not back down on his word against Ragnar and his men.
"Abril, mount your horse. We are to make haste back to the castle." He father sneered at her angrily as he turned his horse to walk away.
He sounded angry at her. And she was confused why he was pushing his anger onto her. The King, her father, hadn't looked at her for more than two seconds since he came to take her home and watched Ragnar and his men sail away. She wasn't sure why she had displeased him, she was just as much a victim as anyone else, if not more so as she had spent nights and days with the angry Northmen. Yes, her stay was shorter than what she initially expected, but it was still a traumatic experience.
All she wanted was to head home and have a hot bath and climb into her own bed after eating a big meal. She wasn't asking for much, but she knew the second she walked back through the gates of her village and through the doors of the villa, things would either go back to normal or they would be very different. She still didn't want to marry Aethelwulf, but she knew a marriage and a home far away from hers actually didn't sound so bad – even if her husband didn't care for any more than what her beauty held.
But was she still beautiful? She didn't feel it. She was bruised and scratched up all over. Even her legs were a mess and that was not a good look for the bishop had already questioned her physical state. And even after assuring him that she was still pure and no one looked upon her nakedness, it seemed he still did not believe her. That thought alone terrified her as if he did not believe her, than no one else would, and at that point she did not know what the future would hold for the young princess.
"My lady, I am pleased to see you." Mary said as she rushed over to help Abril down from her horse.
"Please get me to my room," Abril said as she near collapsed from exhaustion after getting off the horse.
Mary snaked a strong arm around her waist and lead the princess through the villa to her room. Abril kept her eyes downward to avoid eye contact with everyone, she did not want people to see her until she had rested and was bathed and dressed more appropriately.
They passed a mirror on the second floor and Abril got a very quick glimpse of herself; the state she was in was terrifying. She looked much worse than she thought. "You are beautiful, and I look forward to seeing you again," she remembered Ragnar's words as he climbed aboard his boat and yelled to where she stood alone on the shore as her father and his men rode over.
A few tears escaped her eyes as they continued walking slowly down the halls. Usually Abril walked with her head high, back and shoulders straight and with purpose, but today she was feeling anything but lovely. She felt sad, but also happy. It was strange and she didn't like it. And she was also dreading the moment when Abril and Mary were finally alone behind the closed door of her bed chamber.
Abril stood in the centre of the room with her back to the door and Mary, the moment it clicked shut the questions began. "What happened my lady? You look frightened. Are you not pleased to be home again?"
Abril nodded, "Aye, I am pleased to be home. But I am also sad, and confused. But still happy at the same time. It is a strange feeling." The second she finished talking, Abril broke down in tears and crumpled to the floor.
"Oh, my lady, what is the matter? Are you unwell?" Mary asked as she knelt next to Abril and tried to comfort her by rubbing circles on her back.
"No, I am fine. I am just tired and sore, and hungry. Prepare a bath, please." Abril said as she stood and dried her eyes.
She didn't know why she was crying and so upset, so she could not tell Mary anything. The feeling was heartbreaking as Abril had always shared things with Mary, and the servant never passed judgement on anything. She always listened with open ears and mind, something that was rare in Abril's world. Yes, Abril and Judith shared many secrets, but never could Abril express her true thoughts on religion and the ways of the world, the need to marry to greater the fortune of families, and her hatred towards her father and mother.
Abril waited in silence, looking out the window of her room while a bath was prepared. Mary had tried talking to her a few times but she wasn't ready to talk, she may never want to talk again. "My lady, your bath is ready." Mary told her.
After soaking for a few minutes in silence, Mary spoke again. "Your parents have received word from Wessex about your betrothal," she started and Abril perked up right away in wanting to know what was to become of her future. "I am-"
Mary didn't get a chance to finish as at that moment, Abril's mother came bursting through the door. "Mary, leave!" She near shouted.
Abril turned away from her, she was in no mood or state to be putting up with her mother's antics today. "Daughter, it is true, they have harmed your Maidenhead?" Her mother said.
Abril turned in shock and stared wide eyed at her mother, "what? Who said such things? It is not true, the Northmen never touched me. No one even looked upon my nakedness. I swear it." Abril wasn't shouting, but she was angry, and scared.
"The soldiers that were held captive said that Ragnar touched you," her mother said with no ounce of softness or sympathy in her tone.
"It is a misunderstanding."
"Are you telling me they are lying?" Her mother asked.
"No, they speak the truth. But they have misunderstood. Ragnar Lothbrok, he only grabbed my arm and put a hand around my shoulders. I was never touched inappropriately. I swear it, mother."
"You are marked, how did this happen if you were not fighting them?" Her mother asked pointing at the cuts, scrapes and bruises covering her creamy white skin.
"I tried to run from them during the night, I wanted to come home. I slipped and rolled into a ravine and was knocked unconscious. The Northmen, Ragnar, he saved me." Abril admitted.
"So they did not touch you? What is being said is all false?" Her mother asked sternly.
Abril was seething silently from where she sat in the tub. "What are people saying?" She asked.
"Doesn't matter what they are saying if you can assure and approve none of it is true." Her mother replied shaking her head. "You will rest for tonight in your room, your evening meal will be bought up very soon, after you have eaten you must rest and we will resume all tomorrow."
Abril didn't have a chance to counter what was said as her mother made a hastily exit, leaving Abril alone with Mary and another younger servant Maude. Abril started to cry, shedding salty tears into her bath that was no longer relaxing to her worn out and aching body.
"Come my lady, step out and I will prepare you for dinner and rest." Mary said softly.
The rest of the night went in a blur, Abril dressed in a sleep gown and laid in bed until her evening meal arrived, after eating she fell asleep. The entire time since her mother left, Abril thought nothing more than the lack of love and adoration that's both her mother and father had shown towards her since she was back in the care of her Kingdom and the Northmen were leaving.
They seemed angry, disappointed, and upset; but surely those feelings weren't directed at her. She did not understand why they would be to begin with as she couldn't think what she done wrong. Surely it was not because she was in the Heathen camp because she didn't even want to be there in the first place. Ragnar wanted her in his camp, it was him that asked – no, he demanded it. And her father, the King of Northumbria, said yes as to save his brother and land. He cared more about his brother and riches than his own daughter.
This was something she didn't want to say or admit, but she knew it was very much true. And the only question that was left that Abril wanted to know was, what would her future hold now? Rumours had obviously circulated, and although she knew it was all false, no one else did and people will believe what they want too.
At breakfast the next morning, she was seated around the table with both her parents, sister and brother. No one had yet to speak, and Abril knew it was her fault and that something was going on. She however, could not take the deafening silence any longer.
"What is the matter? I know there are issues in regards to myself, and I demand to know." Abril placed her fork down to look between both parents so they knew how serious she was.
"This matter will be formally presented later on today in front of the people, but there are many issues in your return," her father started without looking at her or pausing in bites of food.
"What are these issues that require a formal assembly?" Abril asked more alarmed and nervous than she was before. It was silent for a moment and Abril watched as her mother and father looked between each other than at Judith for a split second. "What is going on? I demand to know!" Abril shouted.
"Do not lose your temper, this is your own fault!" Her father shouted back in a tone that held a certain amount of anger that Abril and her siblings had never heard before. "We weren't expecting you to be returned, we thought that when you left that would be it. Even Mary assumed the worst when you left." Her father paused for a moment to take another bite of his eggs. "You don't understand the severity of the situation, we sent word to Wessex shortly after your departure telling them of the situation and King Ecbert withdrew the marriage proposal and has accepted Judith to be his son's bride and future queen."
"What? Why?" Abril couldn't believe what she was hearing; her parents thought she was as good as gone and were planning her departure to the Northmen's homeland.
"There is no point asking silly questions Abril, you have truly brought this on yourself." Her mother said. She sounded disgusted and displeased.
"How have I bought this on myself? I have done nothing wrong. You and father are the ones that sold me out, it was the pair of you that made me go with them. This is not my fault!" Abril shouted and stood from her seat.
"We were not the ones laughing along and being friendly towards the Northmen's antics when they first arrived here. If you had of remained silent, made no eye contact, and… well, if you had of been the lady you were raised to be, there would be no problems right now." Her father said as waved a servant over to serve him more eggs and bread. "You have put yourself and many people in danger, your uncle especially. My dear brother is dead!" He shouted.
"Yes father, I am aware. I watched Ragnar slice his throat open. And this is not my fault." She replied in almost a whisper.
"Stop! Stop arguing, what is done is done!" Judith interrupted. "This is stupid," she said as she broke down in tears.
"Abril, we will assemble today at the evening meal where your place and future will be decided. Be punctual, I do not wish to see you until then," her father finished before waving her away.
Abril pushed her chair back so hard that is crashed to the floor. She stormed out of the room and headed for the back entrance of the villa.
"I knew I would find you out here," Mary said as she sat down with Abril. She was sitting under the same tree that she was sitting under before she went with the Northmen.
This tree was her own private place, she enjoyed the peace and serenity it bought her, which was the reason she came out here today. But today it bought her none of that, and she was sadder than before now.
"Please Mary, I wish to be alone," Abril stated directly.
"My lady, you know I come as your friend. I know what happened at breakfast today and I want you to know that I am sorry. I too did fear for your safety and well-being, but I am pleased you have returned safe and unharmed." Mary said as she sat down in the grass.
"My parents are not, it is as if they were hoping that I never return." Abril sobbed.
"That is true, but do not upset yourself with this knowledge, it will do you no good at all." Mary tried to comfort and soothe, but there was nothing that could be done.
"What will happen this evening? And what are the rumours circulating around?"
"My lady, do not trouble yourself with-"
Abril turned sharply and glared at Mary. "Stop trying to protect me, we are past that. I want to know… I need too. Please."
"Your father placed spies in the surrounding areas, and apparently you were caught kissing the Northman Ragnar. And the same evening, you were drinking and talking with the Heathens. Also, Ragnar's brother – the one who was baptised – he was seen holding you close and it is said you did not try to fight him off and then later fell asleep with Ragnar."
"Well if they have seen all that, than they must have seen me run away from the camp? Why did they not help me?" Abril asked. "I was trying to come home."
"The orders were not to be seen, get involved or interfere under any circumstances. Your parents and other members feared the worst, we were not prepared for your return."
"Ragnar was never going to take me with him, he did not harm me at all. He did however give me an option to leave with him with the promise of freedom." Abril admitted to Mary even though the princess knew in the back of her mind that it was not wise to be sharing such thoughts with Mary right now. Abril couldn't be sure that her maid was really being her friend right now, or if she was a foe prepared to stab her in the back at whatever means necessary.
"But all that doesn't matter, even though I never wanted to be there, and I didn't want him to kiss me and slapped him after he did, and tried to protect myself as best as I could, and even arrived home safely; it all doesn't matter. None of it matters and I am sure my father is trying to pay someone to take me as a bride as there is surely nothing left for me here."
It was quiet for a few moments before Mary replied and told her that she didn't know what was going to happen. And as soon as Mary said that, Abril knew then that she was lying and that Mary was no longer her friend. The servant that had been loyal and kind for so long had turned on her. Just like everyone else she knew.
She has still yet to speak to Judith, were her thoughts the same? Did she too dislike Abril as much as everyone else?
"You lie to me. And do not hide it because it is obvious. Please leave as I no longer require your service." Abril said bluntly and turned her head to dismiss Mary.
"As you wish my lady."
The evening did not go at all well. Apparently two messengers had been sent when Abril was first taken with Ragnar; one to Wessex and one to Scotland. The one to Wessex to tell of the Viking intrusion and Abril's circumstance. And the one to Scotland to offer Abril as a bride in the country to a noble if she did return. It seemed that if she did return, her father knew that Wessex or anyone in England would not take her so he had to expand and find her a home across the sea.
The messenger from Scotland was yet to return so for now, Abril was to be confined to her chambers until word was given. She was not happy about it, to be treated this way was an insult and she knew there would be no coming back from it. She was lucky to not be burnt at the stake or sent to a slave farm.
"My lady, the meeting went better than I thought it would tonight." Mary said as she walked into Abril's room to prepare her for bed.
Abril did not reply, she was not in the mood to speak with her. Knowing that someone who had been loyal to her for so long was now an enemy was not comforting.
The week dragged on, it was plain and uneventful. Abril had even requested to have all her meals in her room as she did not want to talk to anyone. She felt sad and miserable all the time, she was upset on hearing the constant rumours about her time in the Northmen's camp. The things said were atrocious; that she was no longer a maiden, and that it was taken away the night she arrived at the camp. That she voluntarily kissed Ragnar was cosy with him and his brother. And that she did not want to return home, she wanted to be with the Northmen.
But there was one eventful part of her week; the guard that bought Abril her morning and evening meal seemed kind and friendly. At first she did not talk to him, but on day three Abril realised that things couldn't be worse and she spoke. He normally stayed for about 15 minutes to talk to her; nothing personal, just general chit chat about the weather and happenings around the village.
Abril liked him and found that there was also something familiar about him.
…NIGHT 8…
"I think I know you, there is something familiar about you." Abril said as she started eating.
"Do you remember a young man named Luke?" He asked.
Luke, yes! Abril knew that name but had not heard it for a while. Luke was a young man 5 years Abril's senior who asked for her hand in marriage two years prior. Abril loved him. Luke was good and kind, not a rich and wealthy man, but he did have a comfortable lifestyle and promised to always love, cherish and care for Abril.
They met when Abril frequently walked the village, at first they would pass by each other sharing a look, than they came to start greeting one another, and then it got to the point where she was walking with him daily. Yes she was young, but she cared for him and he cared for her the same.
After Abril's father turned the marriage proposal down by laughing at him, he sent the young man to work in the Mercia kingdom. And Abril never heard anything more from him after, she was not even sure if he was still alive. That was one of the true reasons why she was so against marriage.
"I do remember him, I miss him." Abril said as a few tears started to slip down her cheeks.
"He is well, married with a family but he still misses you. He was both sad and angered to hear what happened with the Northmen. I am his older brother," he told her.
"He is married, and has a family?" Abril asked in disbelief.
"He is. And he wishes you well."
Abril nodded and couldn't bring herself to say anything after that. The guard than continued to tell her that he too cared for her and would like to offer her a marriage proposal. This both shocked and scared Abril, and she told him that she could not marry him.
"So you will lie with a heathen Viking, but will not marry me; a fine English soldier? What is the matter with you?" He spat at her as he grasped her shoulders and gave her a small shake.
The abruptness made Abril jump back a little, "I'm sorry?" She asked quietly.
"You heard me, princess." He said as he stood and started to tower over her. "If you will not marry me than you will lie with me like you have lain with those animals." He said as he grabbed her and pulled her roughly to the bed.
"No, I have not bed any man. I am still a maiden. You cannot do this!" Abril tried to keep control of her emotions and the situation, but like everything else in her life right now, it was crumbling and she was a wreck. "Guards!" She screamed.
"Hush," he snapped at her as he pushed her face down on her bed.
"NO!" Abril started to scream as he pulled her dress up and spread her leg with his thighs.
Right as she felt the flesh of his man hood on her legs, her chamber door flung open and the guard was seized.
Abril fell to the floor and huddled in a ball next to her bed. Tears were streaming down her face and she was finding it difficult to breathe and concentrate on what was happening around her. The last thing Abril remembered before everything went black was Mary crouching down in front of her.
The next day, during a formal court, the incident that took place in Abril's room last night was discussed. The guard said that Abril had been talkative and flirtatious with him all week. He said she wanted to bed him. Abril said that it was all a lie, but it was clear that she was not believed. The guard was released but was given a new position, and Abril was sentenced to her bedroom and strict orders were given that the only family members and Mary were to enter until she was sent to Scotland.
A marriage acceptance came back to a nobleman in Scotland and the soon-to-be-husband wanted Abril to come as soon as possible. So in 2 days Abril will start her travels to a new home and be married into a home that she didn't know and wanted no part in.
But Abril was pleased to find that Mary would be travelling to Scotland with her, at least there was going to be one familiar face in an unfamiliar land. And Abril wondered what would become of her future, up until the Northmen had arrived, Abril's life was set in stone. But now, everything was different, and it all happened so fast. Her entire life that was planned and set out from the moment she was born was gone and she didn't know what was to come.
"Please, don't send me away. I haven't done anything that I was not told to do. I have not shamed you, I am still a maiden, I am still everything that I was before you sent me away." Abril pleaded to her father as he was saying his goodbyes to her.
"We will not discuss this, and you will not blame me. I have done what was best, and my brother is dead. Whether you are or are not a maiden doesn't matter. The fact is that I have tried and cannot find you a husband in England, this Scot has paid a good fortune for you and you will become his bride."
Abril argued further, raising her voice while pleading and crying not to be sent away. She was a woman, but still felt like a child. She wanted her mother and father to love and cherish her like they did her sister and brother. She wanted them to put her happiness and well-being before their own for once.
But that was not the way, and Abril knew it. But it still would be nice to think things would be different.
"We will pray for your safe travels," her mother said as the door to the carriage was closed.
"Wait, where is Judith? I wish to say goodbye to her." Abril said quickly.
"That will not be possible. Be grateful for the farewell you have and pray that you be accepted by God once again," her father said before waving the carriage on.
They had been travelling for most of the day and night when they finally arrived to the water where there was a boat waiting along with a few camp fires and two tents. Abril was tired and worn out from travelling and the constant flow of tears. She was however glad for Mary coming with her, she told Abril stories and said that she was not trying to hurt her but she did have to be against her while still in the village for her own sake.
So it seemed that Mary still cared for her, she just had to protect herself as well. Abril could understand that and see where Mary was coming from.
"Are you pleased to be away from the Villa?" Abril asked.
"I am, leaving means so much to me, and these mishaps have allowed me to leave." Mary replied.
What she said made Abril question the maids answer for a second, but she was too tired to think any more on the matter and wanted to rest before the voyage across the water tomorrow. The two women were escorted to a tent and given a basic meal of dried meat, bread, cheese and wine. After eating and enjoying a few grapes and apples for dessert, the women found sleep in a pile of furs.
Abril never thought she'd be sharing the same sleep space as a servant, but she also thought she'd never be taken from her home by Vikings and then sent to a place across the water to marry someone that she knew nothing about. Her parents and Mary told her nothing about her future Scottish husband.
And the fact that he was Scottish was something that angered Abril, she was fuming that a Scot was the only person her parents managed to find to marry her. Surely not everyone had heard about her encampment with the Vikings and she was that tarnished that a marriage closer to her home couldn't be found.
She told Ragnar that she did not want to marry, and at the time she meant it. But a marriage seemed the best way of fixing things as she didn't want to be known as a spinster and ruined woman. Abril did not want people knowing her as a woman that bought shame to herself and her family by sleeping with a Heathen Viking. She wanted freedom and happiness, but at what price would she get that?
