Portrait of Mom

(Sequel/follow up to Chapter 3: Means of Survival)

Decades had passed. Ages, maybe. It had been a lifetime since he'd had to leave her in the spirit realm. A lifetime he had spent regretting the moment he'd let go of the hand he'd unknowingly brought back to life, and a lifetime he should have spent at her side. It felt like it had been a lifetime ago, so long ago that the precious memories were blurring and he couldn't remember exactly where the dark dots on her face had lied. And yet, all at the same time, the pain was fresh enough to have been committed yesterday. Her last cry of "I love you too!" was a sound burned into his mind that replayed often. In the end, she had been right. He needed to go back to the living for more reasons than one. She was always right, even when he didn't want her to be. Not a day had passed that he hadn't thought of her, or wondered how she was spending her time in eternity. But years had passed since he'd mentioned her name aloud.

"Dad, is this…is this her?" The soft voice brought the old panda from his daydreams of spars and late night conversations. He gently lifted himself from his seat and meandered over to where Lei Lei stood in the scroll room. His staff had doubled as a crutch in his elder years. Lei lei had matured to be an old soul, much like her mother. She had never lost her spark of curiosity or desire to learn, and her exuberant personality brought joy to the palace in the years she had lived there. Not to mention, being adopted into a family of six kung fu warriors had turned her into quite the skilled master.

Po reached her side, and peered over her tense shoulder to see a crinkled, aged painting in her now tight hands. She stared at the image intently, with awe and an overwhelming sense of longing. When Po recognized the familiar old painting, his heart sunk. A young Tigress, about the age of her death, stood between Po and Shifu at the top of the steps to the Palace. All three were in elegant poses, demonstrating both skill and nobility. And all three held soft smiles on their faces. Po remembered the day it had been done, when the grandmasters of the Jade Palace were to be documented in painting yet again. Shifu had always insisted Tigress be included, as she was the leader of the Five. He recalled how she had been teasing him that day, daring him to pose balanced on one leg as she often did. He had laughed in response, commenting that he'd fall before it was halfway completed. She had promised to catch him. He was tempted to force a tumble just for that purpose.

Po's eyes pinched together, and he silently wished old age wouldn't allow him the flood of memories tormenting him in that moment.

"Is this my mom?" Lei lei gently asked again, as he had forgotten her question. She looked up at his twisted expression. Po nodded.

"Yes, this is… that's your mother." His voice was aged. Lei lei returned her gaze to the portrait and was silent as she took in the image.

"What was she like?" She asked tentatively. Po sighed through a reminiscing smile, looking upward at the ornate ceiling as if he were looking to her. Lei lei turned to face him, her glowing curiosity and empathy unfailing.

"She was the single most dedicated warrior I have ever known," he began, taking a seat to answer her in depth. She seemed pleased, and listened intently.

"She was the most loving person you'd ever meet, always put others before herself. Even complete strangers, she never hesitated. And she was brave, she was so brave." He was almost bragging at this point. Lei lei smiled warmly at her father.

"I've heard she was an amazing warrior." She encouraged him.

"Oh, the best there was. We had some of these combination moves, ha- oh man, I don't know if they were more for fighting or for fun! You shoulda' seen some of the things she could do." Po chuckled and Lei Lei followed suit, but his face soon fell again.

"She was sacrificing. She saved my life more times than I can count, probably more times than I even know of. I owe her so much." Po looked to the ground, almost in regret.

"Did she love me?" Lei lei asked, though she knew the answer. Po smiled again.

"More than you will ever know. I thought I'd seen her open up as much as she possibly could have, until you came along. You made something come alive in her." Po answered honestly. Joyful tears welled in Lei lei's eyes. She gazed at the paper in her hand once again, then handed it to Po to admire as well. He took it in a shaking old hand and cradled it as if it were her hand in his own once again. His eyes rested on her image. The painter had done her well, as her bright eyes were glowing off of the paper. The gentle yet ferocious curves of her face were accurate to life, as was the smile on his young face due to her next to him. His eye trailed left, to the image of Shifu standing beside her. He noticed the unmistakable look of pride on the old master's face as he had presented his top students beside him. A pride that he had made known aloud to Po before he had passed, making Po thankful that Tigress would soon be meeting him in the spirit realm. The thought of her there alone all those years ate away at him, and made him almost long for the day they would meet again as they had promised.

Lei Lei watched the tears form in her father's eyes, and placed a comforting palm on his shoulder. The common gesture was one that mimicked Tigress so much that he was sure she had something to do with it every time that soft paw landed on him.

"Dad?" she asked.

"I'm fine, I'm fine. Just remembering." He smiled and sighed contently, putting his own hand atop hers. He gazed at Tigress's image one last time.

"She was my best friend."

"You must have really loved her." Lei lei commented. It was more of an observation than a question.

"I do, more than anything." He folded the picture again, concealing the bittersweet art within it and looked his daughter in the eye.

"And I'm thankful I have a piece of her with me."