Author's Notes: It has (literally) been years since I last updated and I am (figuratively) a different person than the one who was writing this fanfic. I didn't mean to abandon it, but things happened. Now that life has settled down, I'll finish it anyway for the small chance that the readers who were once following this fanfic would stumble upon it again.
Disclaimer: Naruto does not belong to me.
Sakura Finds Out
Chapter 7: Teachers Know Best?
A flushed Hyuuga Hinata was running. And a panting Uzumaki Naruto was chasing after her.
Anko just had to stop and stare. It wasn't a sight that she was expecting until after Naruto had discovered the 'Come come to Make-Out Paradise, the First-Timer's Edition!' Kakashi had been keeping in reserve until his students' sixteenth birthdays.
"Sensei, please help me!" the Hyuuga heiress pleaded.
"What's happening?"
"I told Naruto-kun that I liked him and now he's following me and I'm running away, the thing is Naruto-kun likes Sasuke-kun and Sakura-chan kissed Sasuke-kun, Sakura-chan told me that Naruto-kun likes Sasuke-kun ."
"Huh?" Anko scratched her head. "Sakura kissed Sasuke because he likes Naruto, and Naruto is chasing you because you like him?"
"Hinata, please let me explain!"
"He's here!" Hinata yelped.
"Listen to me!" Naruto begged. "I didn't steal Sasuke-bastard from Sakura-chan! And the only reason Sasuke-bastard confessed to me is because—"
His next words were lost forever as he flew from Anko's solid uppercut. "You crush stealer, you! That girl trusted you as a teammate and you go behind her back and seduce the Uchiha hottie!"
"Ugghh…." The crumpled heap that was Naruto mumbled incoherently.
Hinata tilted her head uncertainly. "I wonder… was Naruto-kun trying to tell me something important?"
"Forget it!" Anko cried emphatically, slinging her arm on the younger kunoichi's shoulders and leading her away. "Men are always making excuses! Just take Iruka for example. My request was very simple: purple and red pansies. And guess what he does? He comes crawling back to me with some lame fake bruises, claiming that he wasn't able to get him because you, along with your three other female batchmates, attacked him!"
Attacked… Iruka-sensei? Hinata frowned, as a ghost of a memory involving beheaded flowers in the Yamanaka shop and her three dearest friends in the world and the ninja academy teacher itched at the edge of her brain.
"He didn't even have the guts to just admit that he forgot them!" The jounin clucked her tongue disapprovingly. "I mean, a grown man putting the blame on four young girls? Maybe I could believe it if he just said Sakura, Ino, and Ten-Ten, but no, he included you as well. Innocent, angelic, little Hinata—how can that face possibly be capable of beating up a full-grown jounin?!" Anko squeezed the girl's cheeks between both hands.
"Actually, Sensei…" Faint images of a screaming Iruka flashed in her head, somehow she was very angry at that time and maybe she shouted something like 'Hakke Hyaku Nijuuhachi Shou!' and then it seemed her vision turned red…
"Why, Hinata? Did you really do something to Iruka at that time?" Anko pushed the girl's face close to a shiny shop window. "Could it be possible that this harmless-looking face commit such a terrible act to the very dedicated teacher who provided her with the solid foundation upon which she built her ninja way to be able to reach her current Chuunin rank?"
"Well…" Hinata gazed at the reflection of her own pure pearly eyes. She blinked. "No Anko-sensei. Of course not."
And just like that, the memory of a tenketsu-blocked Iruka was flushed to the secret compartment of Hinata Hyuuga's brain where she discarded memories that were too traumatic (like the odoriferous air phenomenon after Kiba removes his shoes) or questions that were best left unanswered (like if there were eyes behind Shino's sunglasses) or other thoughts that were simply too dangerous (like what she could do with Naruto, two bottles of sake, and some well-fashioned ninja rope).
They made such a good head start, but failed to consider the direction in their hurry and ended up on the riverbank.
"This way!" Neji pointed down the bank.
"Why?" Ten-Ten retorted. "Why do you get to choose where we go from here? I say we go across the river!"
"I don't really care, let's just go!"
She narrowed her eyes at him. "You don't care?! You're such a jerk, you can't even talk about the simplest matters, but what should I expect from you anyway, deceitful liar?"
"You know, you really should take your medicine."
"Don't try to pretend like you know what's good for me!"
"At last!" Gai gathered them both in a bear hug, shedding tears of relief. "I'm so glad I was able to catch up with you before you could get carried away by the moment and act upon your youthful feelings!"
'We aren't doing anything!" Neji roared. "And we didn't do anything, and I refuse to be lectured for something that I never had the pleasure of doing!"
"Are you saying… that you wouldn't get any pleasure from a 'youthful moment' with me?" Tenten seethed.
"What? That's not what I'm saying at all!"
"Then you're saying that you wished you had a youthful pleasure moment with Ten-Ten?" Gai gasped.
"Well…" That would be very… Neji slapped his forehead. This isn't the time to be thinking about soft hair and tight cheongsams! "All I'm saying is that we haven't had that moment! Lee gave you the wrong information!"
"So Lee didn't really see you," point at Ten-Ten, "suck at your," point at Neji, "neck?"
"Well he did," Ten-Ten admitted. "But—"
"Then you ARE exploring the unfamiliar territory of 'adult relationships.'" Gai flicked quotation marks in the air.
"No!" Neji howled, frustrated. "She did it to stop my bleeding—"
"Oh yes, the bleeding of your lonely adolescent heart," the teacher nodded with the utmost understanding. "However, you must realize that one thing often leads to another, and I am well aware of Ten-Ten's budding feelings for Neji—feelings which could have her attempt to influence his youthful instincts!"
"What?!" Ten-Ten cried. "Are you implying that I would be so desperate as to seduce Neji? I would never –"
"Ah," Gai shook a finger at her face. "You protest my dumpling-haired buttercup, but isn't that the lipgloss for youthful beauties I specifically got in the shade of 'Ninja Love Attack?'"
"Uh… no?" the dumpling-haired buttercup lied, rubbing her lips with the back of her hand.
"I understand how you feel my little spring roll," Gai proclaimed. He waved his hands grandly and stepped forward, turning his face to the sun. "You are fearful of the maturation process, of the countless changes that are commencing, of the sudden surging of scorching sentiments—but this is why Gai-sensei is here, to guide you through the unknown and exciting adolescent world! So what do you say, my precious little youths, let us go together, with the winds of change on our back, towards the shining sun of tomorrow!"
He turned around to find a glaringly empty NejiTen-shaped void.
"NEVER!" Neji screamed, ninja-running over the river's waters, hand-in-hand with Ten-Ten. "I never want anyone to teach me about fountains of fiery feelings and my mystifying metamorphosis into manhood—especially not you!"
Yuuhi Kurenai thought it was decidedly suspicious.
From the other side of Kakashi's door, sleazy music played, punctuated by excited gasps and frantic moans. Hanging from the doorknob was a 'Come Come Paradise'-issued Do Not Disturb sign.
She was about to go on her way, ready to dismiss it as Kakashi simply being the pervert that he is and watching his questionable videos, but she heard voices… very familiar, very young voices.
"Iyah, Sasuke-kun, not so roughly!"
"It can't be helped, I want to be released as soon as possible. Don't you want the same thing?"
"Well… yes, but I wish you'd be a bit more careful about it. We might wake up Pakkun…"
"Don't worry, he'll definitely be unconscious for a couple of hours. We can do anything. He won't catch us."
"Alright Sasuke-kun, if you say so…"
"This is no good, Sakura… I think I have to take off my pants now."
"Huh? Then I guess… I'll take off my clothes too—"
"These children!" Kurenai clapped her hands over mouth. "They took one too many peeks at Kakashi's questionable books—I must stop them before they do anything reckless!"
She kicked the door open, shouting: "STOP!"
And found the pair of disheveled teenagers tangled on the floor.
"Just what do you think you're doing!" she screamed.
Uchiha Sasuke looked from his torn clothes, to Haruno Sakura pinned under him, to the shocked jounin sensei, and said: "It's not what it looks like."
"That's what they always say," Kurenai stepped in the apartment and glared at them. She swiveled her head at an especially loud moan and saw the video playing on the television. "Why that's… that's!!"
"But it's true, Kurenai-sensei!" Sakura claimed. "We were trapped on the couch because Kakashi-sensei wanted to make us watch the video and Pakkun was guarding us and we had to put him to sleep and we almost had to tear our clothes to escape—"
"Enough!" Kurenai snapped at them. "Do you actually expect to believe me that your own sensei would put you up to this? Kakashi may be irresponsible and unorthodox—"
"You have no idea," Sasuke muttered.
"—but even he wouldn't encourage this kind of behavior!" she stomped towards the chuunins and grabbed an ear in each hand.
"Sensei, please—"
"I will not stand to be treated this way, I am an Uchiha—"
"You may have had it easy before, having such a lax sensei, but no more!" she declared. "It's obvious that somebody needs to draw the line here, and if it has to be me, then so be it."
Dragging two of the most talented chuunins of Konoha by the ear, Kurenai headed out the apartment purposefully, crimson eyes glowing with determination.
"I will protect the innocence of the village's next generation—I swear by my honor as a ninja!"
Genma paused and looked up from the document he was writing on. "Your complaint is that every single one of your male batchmates turned out to be gay and you want to go to Hokage-sama to have them expelled from the ninjahood?"
Ino slammed her palm on the table. "Please hurry up and process that complaint form! This is a very serious matter!"
"But Ino-chan…" Shizune tugs at her hair, looking discomfited. "Expelling someone from the ninjahood is an extreme measure usually reserved for the vilest crimes…"
"It's only as a last resort," the blond girl assured her. "First, I'd like to request a cure from Tsunade-sama for their unfortunate condition—and should the highest medical jutsus fail, only then do I move for the expulsion of the said anomalous characters from the ninjahood."
"Cure for anomalous boys," Genma murmured as he scribbled on the document. His partner raised an eyebrow at him. "What? Shouldn't we be as faithful as possible to the telling of the ninja conflict at hand?"
Shizune rolled her eyes. "Anyway, have you anything to say for yourself, Shikamaru-kun?"
The lanky teenager was leaning languidly against a pillar, watching the conversation through half-closed eyes. "No."
"Then you admit the validity of Yamanaka Ino's allegations?" Genma whistled. "Wow, I never saw this coming."
"They're not true of course," the boy drawled. "But it would be too troublesome to file a counter-complaint. You'd want me to retell the situation in my point-of-view with as much detail as possible, to accomplish a written form in triplicate, to go through an interrogation with Baki's squad, and finally, to testify before the Hokage. No thank you, it's too much trouble. I'd rather just wait until her story is proven false."
"Well wait all you want," Ino seethed. "After all I'm the one who's telling the truth. I know what I saw!'
"What you saw?" Shikamaru smirked. "Don't you mean what Sakura saw?"
"Huh?"
"You yourself didn't see anything after all," he retorted. "You weren't there. You just know what Sakura told you."
"Well, so what?" She planted her hands on her hips and raised her chin aggressively. "Sakura is one hundred percent positive about what she saw!"
"Wait a minute, Ino-chan," Shizune cut in. "If Sakura-chan was actually the one who saw those things, then that changes things. She'd have to be the one to recount what she saw and she'd have to act as a witness on your behalf."
"So where's Sakura?" Genma asked.
"She's here," Kurenai announced, hauling Sakura and Sasuke by the ear into the office. She let go of them and they both fell on the ground, groaning and massaging their earlobes. "With her fellow overly curious teenage partner. I'm here to lodge a complaint."
"You too?" Shizune frowned concernedly. "What's the matter, Kurenai-sensei?"
"It has come to my attention that the children—" she glowered at the pair of teens who looked at her sulkily, "—of this village haven't been getting enough guidance."
"In what sense?" Shizune asked, her pen poised over a fresh document.
"Excuse me," Ino coughed deliberately, tapping her foot impatiently. "I was here first. Sorry, Kurenai-sensei, but this is important."
"Not now, Ino," Shizune shushed. "Kurenai-sensei is discussing a serious matter."
"Well, so am I!"
"I'll process your complaint," Genma said, quickly smoothing things over. "Let Shizune handle Kurenai-sensei's."
"Getting back," Kurenai pointed at Sakura, who now stood next to Ino, and at Sasuke, who joined Shikamaru by the pillar. "I caught these two indulging their curiosity… being experimental—well, simply put, they were reenacting Kakashi's questionable videos!"
Genma dropped his pen and gaped. "But she said—" pointing at Ino, "that their batchmates were all gay!"
"Thank you for making my case," Shikamaru chuckled. "Your hormones have served well."
"I was doing no such thing for you," the other boy huffed.
Ino clapped her hands over her mouth. "Sakura, you mean you—"
Sakura shook her head vehemently. "No, it's just a misunderstanding!"
"I know what I saw." Kurenai insisted.
"But it wasn't what it looked like!"
"Sounds familiar?" Sasuke sneered. "Don't you make similar leaps to conclusions yourself?"
"That's different—"
"Your love quarrel can wait," the jounin sensei raised a hand to silence them. "My point is, I'd like to request to Hokage-sama to provide for specific education to the teenagers as they transition into adulthood."
"I reject!"
"I second that rejection!"
Ten-Ten and Neji stomped into the office, wild-eyed and breathless. The Hyuuga flipped his hair and in one fluid motion, pointed at the fast approaching green jumpsuited figure.
"That creature has been trying to give us specific education in what has been the most maddening hour of my life!"
"If that's the kind of education you have in mind, then we reject that proposal!" The dumpling-haired girl shrieked. "In fact, we're here to lodge a complaint against teachers who take it upon themselves to go beyond the prescribed ninja curriculum into such personal matters!"
"I suppose you think that would take out much of the excitement from your adolescent adventures," Kurenai said dryly.
"I refuse to be accused of something that I never had the pleasure of doing!" Neji declared.
"Because you want to have the pleasure of doing it first?" Genma speculated. Shizune elbowed him smartly in the ribs.
"My precious yooooouths!"
Ten-Ten grasped both Sakura and Ino by the arm, and Neji hid behind Sasuke, Shikamaru and pillar. Gai entered the room with a flying kick and a dazzling smile.
"I suppose you're here to complain too," Genma muttered sarcastically. "Well, you'll have to wait, we're fully booked right now."
"No, I have no complaints," the sensei said. "As long as I have my lovely dumpling-haired buttercup and my freely soaring bird then I am content. Come, my darlings!" He twirled two perfect rotations then poised on one tiptoed foot, holding out his hands at his errant students.
Ten-Ten wrinkled her nose. "Err… no."
The office door was kicked open with a bang.
"What now?" Shizune sighed.
"I'm here to –hic- complain my lodging! –hic–hic- You had all listen better!" Anko slurred, stumbling into the office, supported by Hyuuga Hinata. An empty sake bottle was clenched tightly in her hand.
"I'm so sorry," the girl bowed at everyone, ashamed. "I tried to stop her but she wouldn't listen to me…"
"–hic- My complaint is men in general! For being –hic- such… men!" Anko smashed the bottle on the floor and snarled at the males in the office. "You're all such –hic- men!"
Genma grinned at her. "Anko-chan, be a good girl and have a lie down. The clinic is next door."
"Shaddap!"
"Don't provoke her!" Shizune scolded. "Look, this is an administrative office, not a tavern, so let's all please act like civilized ninjas! Now, we'll process one complaint at a time. I guess we're back to your issue, Ino-chan. You demand that all your male batchmates be expelled from the ninjahood for being gay. Can anyone of you boys tell us what was happening when Sakura saw Sasuke confessing to Naruto?"
Shikamaru shrugged. "I told you, it's too troublesome."
"Hn." Sasuke turned away haughtily.
"I could…" Neji said slowly. Sasuke glared daggers at him. "That is, if I hadn't given my word as a ninja not to disclose the truth behind the truth of that situation."
"What do you mean?"
"It is Sasuke's secret to tell, not mine."
"Sasuke-kun?" Shizune looked at him inquiringly. "It seems you have the key to solving this puzzle. What happened that time, really?"
"Well…" he hesitated. His gaze wandered to Sakura, who blinked at him wonderingly. He quickly looked away, his cheeks flushed.
"What is it?"
"… I can't."
"I CAN!"
Everyone turned to the destroyed doorway. Naruto stood, silhouetted by the daylight, a toothy grin on his bruised face.
"I'll tell you what was really going on that day. I don't care that Sasuke bastard doesn't want me to do it."
The other boy hissed some unintelligible curses.
"What matters is that everyone will know the truth… especially my Hinata."
Neji choked then rose to his full height and stomped towards Naruto. "Your Hinata?"
"Wait, Neji-niisan!" she cried. "I… I want to hear what Naruto has to say."
"It's about time," Kiba snickered. He entered the office, followed by Shino, Chouji, and Lee.
Naruto smiled. "Well, now that we're all here, let me tell you about that day…"
Author's Notes (again): So, here we are finally. When I started this fanfic, I hoped for it to be finished quickly, but circumstances got in the way. But at least, we're nearly there. For anyone who wants to get in touch (maybe to make sure that I won't let the same unplanned hiatus happen again or something), feel free to PM me through this site or LJ (refer to my profile) or some other method. Since I'm busy with work, language lessons and other personal stories, it might take up to a month for the next chapter to come out. But not longer than that. I made a deal with august gem (also on ) to finish our pending stories. So, we will. I'll work on "Between Light and Darkness" after this one.
