"Last time on The Smashy Amazing Race, six teams set out on the seventh leg on a race around the world!" said Master Hand.

"To get to their next destination, Angel Land, teams had to book a charter rainbow boat on which limited seats were available! Mewtwo and Falco, having played a dirty trick on the leg before… were shunted out of the front of the pack!"

"I guess playing dirty doesn't always work!" taunted Ness, handing Mewtwo the clipboard.

"Teams arrived in Angel Land, where Jigglypuff was amazed by the location!"

"Wow, this place is great!" said Jigglypuff, pointing to several men nearby in a communal bath.

"But Jigglypuff and Pikachu had some relationship problems, holding them up at a clue!"

Said Pikachu, "What the hell's that supposed to mean? You're a deluded old lady you!"

Jigglypuff sniffed.

Jigglypuff burst into tears. "Waaah!" she cried.

Jigglypuff threw the straw at Pikachu.

"I hate you! I hate you!" said Jigglypuff angrily. "I'm never going to be with you… …ever again!"

"Fox and Samus and Snake and Yoshi braved a detour choice where… teams had to… be brave! This choice involved fighting trained warriors and beasts in an attempt to escape a Coliseum!"

"Don't let them put you off…" said Snake, the beasts coming closer and closer. "Just focus on your first move…"

The beasts were about twenty metres away.

"TAKE HIM!" screamed Snake, throwing Yoshi towards the warriors, Snake bailing and running back to the dungeons.

"Teams travelled on a chariot to Paletuna's Palace, where one team member from each team had to shoot a bullseye!"

Samus released the second arrow, missing the bullseye by an inch again.

"Errg," said Samus angrily.

"Go Samus! Go Samus!" cheered Fox from the sideline.

"Jigglypuff took her time… much to Pikachu's frustration!"

"Hurry up, Jigglypuff!" said Pikachu angrily.

"Aiming, sweetie!" sung Jigglypuff happily, focusing on the target.

"Well at least hurry up!" said Pikachu angrily.

"Ai-ming!" sung Jigglypuff happily.

"…this eventually erupted into an even worse problem!"

"Uh! Huh! Huh!" cried Jigglypuff hysterically, making involuntary spasm-like horse neighing noises.

Jigglypuff missed the target by several metres.

"See what you've made me done?" cried Jigglypuff, tears flowing down her cheeks, setting up the next bow. "I hate you, Pikachu!"

"But Jigglypuff's luck pulled her through the challenge…"

Jigglypuff let go of the arrow.

"I just randomly hit the bullseye!" said Jigglypuff angrily, "Lah dee dah dee dah!"

Jigglypuff's arrow hit the bullseye.

Pikachu stared, astonished.

"…and landed her team in first place!"

"Jigglypuff and Pikachu," said Master Hand, "You're team number one!"

"Yay!" cheered Jigglypuff and Pikachu.

"Bowser and Ness, twenty minutes behind second-last place team Peach and Knuckle Joe, contemplated elimination!"

"Dad and I are the last team on a shuttle," said Ness, "And our only hope is that it's a non-elimination or someone stuffs up really bad…"

"But Peach and Knuckle Joe fell behind, after a brush with the law!" said Master Hand.

The local police stood next to Knuckle Joe's body, staring at Peach angrily.

"Ooh! Are you here to arrest Knuckle Joe for being a midget?" laughed Peach, stomping on Knuckle Joe's corpse.

"…after her escape, Peach and Knuckle Joe and Bowser and Ness had a tense footrace to the pit stop!"

"Come on, Dad! The final stretch!" cried Ness.

"We're gonna beat you!" said Peach angrily.

"But it was Peach, after murdering her own teammate that got her disqualified from the race!"

"For the second time in the history of The Smashy Amazing Race, we have a team at the pit stop which has one member missing," said Master Hand, "Therefore, Peach and Knuckle Joe, you are the last team to arrive… …and you have been eliminated from the race."

"Five teams remain, who will be eliminated… next?" said Master Hand.

The Teams:
Bowser and Ness (Mother and Daughter)

Falco and Mewtwo (Civil Disobedience in Training)

Jigglypuff and Pikachu (De-Facto Digimon)

Snake and Yoshi (Accountancy Masters)

Fox and Samus (Failures)

"This is Angel Land… literally… a slice of heaven!" said Master Hand, "This blissful place is also the seventh pit stop in a race around the world!"

A shot of Jigglypuff and Snake sneakily placing venomous, deadly animals on a sleeping Bowser played in the background.

"Teams stayed at Pit's House for a mandatory twelve hour pit stop, where teams would eat, sleep, and mingle with the other teams!" said Master Hand. "Can Pikachu and Jigglypuff, despite their constant bickering, focus and stay in first place? How will Falco and Mewtwo react from their rejection from the front of the pack by their fellow teams? And can Bowser and Ness, the only team left that consistently places in the bottom three, finally get into a rhythm and dig themselves out of last place?"

"Jigglypuff and Pikachu, who were the first team to arrive at 7:56 PM, will depart at 7:56 AM!"

Jigglypuff and Pikachu
1
st to depart: 7:56 AM

Pikachu opened the clue. "Fly to Goldenrod City, Johto and find the Goldenrod Bike Shop!"

"Teams must now fly over two thousand kilometres to Goldenrod City, Johto!" said Master Hand, "Once teams arrive in this popular Pokemon Destination, they must travel thirty-two kilometres to this bike shop and search through the complex for their next clue!"

"Yay! We're going back to the homeland!" cheered Jigglypuff, "Isn't this so exciting?"

"Not really…" said Pikachu, "I mean… going back there is basically reminding myself of those twenty years of torture I had to go through as a Pokemon… all of that unnecessary training and abuse that I had to put myself through…"

"Oh… lighten up…" said Jigglypuff, "Besides… I hear there's a new water fun park there! Why… it might be some fun!"

"Yay!" cheered Pikachu.

A seven minute montage of Jigglypuff and Pikachu experiencing the rides played on the screen.

"What ride shall we go on next?" said Jigglypuff happily, covered in sunblock, reading a park map, "The T… Johto's only tornado-like water ride… or the mysterious WC?"

Jigglypuff made some spooky motions with her hands.

"Jigglypuff," said Pikachu, "That's a wash cupboard… it means it's a toilet."

"Oh," said Jigglypuff.

Fox and Samus
2
nd to depart: 7:57 AM

Samus grabbed the clue.

"Wait!" said Fox desperately, "…before we open the clue… I must read this poem to you…"

Samus sighed.

Fox cleared his throat and took out a napkin with biro ink all over it. "The top ten reasons why I love Samus… number one… you are so beautiful…"

"Number two… I love the way that your hair blossoms in the wind…" said Fox romantically.

"Number three… when I have my own happy time," said Fox, "I always… always and only… think of you."

Added Fox, looking up from the poem, "By the way, 'my own happy time' is referring to the process in which I vigorously-"

"NO! SHUT UP!" screamed Samus, taken out a bread knife and cutting a deep hole in Fox's chest area, reaching in and removing his heart.

"AAAAH!" screamed Fox, falling to the ground, dying.

"Huh," said Samus.

"Wait!" screamed Samus anxiously, "I never heard what happened in Fox's happy time!"

Samus had a nervous breakdown.

Angel Land Airport

Jigglypuff and Pikachu
Dating Pokemon

"Wow…" said Pikachu, walking with Jigglypuff into the Kanto Airlines ticket desk, "This is going to take a long time…"

Fox and Samus
Entrepreneurs

"Hey guys…" said Fox, lining up behind Jigglypuff and Pikachu.

Mewtwo and Falco
3
rd to depart: 8:19 AM

"Fly to Goldenrod City, Johto and find the Goldenrod Bike Shop!" read Falco, "You have 27 dollars for this leg of the race."

"Let's go," said Mewtwo.

Mewtwo and Falco
Martial Arts Experts

"I don't know about you, Mewtwo," said Falco confidently, "But I'm in it to win it!"

"In it to win it…" said Mewtwo, "More like, you're in it to be gay…"

"Because you like men," said Mewtwo.

Snake and Yoshi
4
th to depart: 8:20 AM

"Fly to Goldenrod City, Johto and find the Goldenrod Bike Shop!" read Snake.

"Let's go!" said Yoshi happily.

Snake and Yoshi
Accountancy Students

"Despite what you may see on the camera," said Yoshi, "Snake's actually a really good guy… he has this sense of care that you won't find in many other people-"

"DIE! DIE!" screamed Snake, laughing manically, gunning down a nearby homeless shelter.

The tape cut out.

Snake and Yoshi
Accountancy Students

"De- de- despite…" said Yoshi, trembling, his torso covered in blood because Snake wiped the blood of the men in poverty that stained his shirt onto him, "De- de- despite… what you may… see on the camera…"

Snake held a gun threateningly to Yoshi's head, Yoshi laughing nervously.

"He's a… a… a great guy!" said Yoshi, laughing manically.

"He's a great guy! He's a great guy!" laughed Yoshi crazily.

Angel Land Airport

Jigglypuff and Pikachu
Dating Pokemon

Jigglypuff and Pikachu reached the Kanto Air counter. "Hey," said Pikachu, "Can we have the fastest flight to Goldenrod City?"

"Okay…" replied the agent, typing into a computer, "There's a 2:00 PM flight that arrives in Johto at 8:30 AM."

"Okay, we'll take that," said Pikachu.

Fox and Samus
On 2:00 Kanto Air Flight

"We're on the same flight as the Pokemon," said Samus.

Snake and Yoshi
Accountancy Students

"Wow… these lines are going to take a long time…" said Yoshi, walking into the Kanto Air queue.

Mewtwo and Falco
Martial Arts Experts

"This is gonna take a while," said Falco, resting on his bag.

Bowser and Ness
Last to depart: 9:02 AM

"Fly to Goldenrod City, Johto and find the Goldenrod Bike Shop!" read Ness.

"That's awesome!" said Bowser excitedly, "We finally get to see Pokemon! Real Pokemon!"

"You… do realise we've been racing with five other Pokemon… right?" said Ness.

"Oh," said Bowser.

"Well," said Bowser happily, "…at least this will be the first time I'll get to meet a Squirtle!"

Bowser squeaked excitedly.

Angel Land Airport

Fox and Samus
Entrepreneurs

Jigglypuff, Pikachu, Fox and Samus sat in an airport coffee shop, leaning back and relaxing as they sipped their little plastic cups.

"We're hanging with Jigglypuff and Pikachu in the airport before our flight," said Fox to the camera, grinning, "I think they're a couple of cool guys! They appreciate me and my jokes, unlike some people!"

Fox stared angrily at Samus.

"Fox, they don't even understand English," said Samus angrily, "They're just babbling away in their incoherent languages while you tell your humourless anecdotes and pretend that their laughter is caused by your awful jokes!"

"Oh yeah?" said Fox angrily.

Fox looked at Jigglypuff and Pikachu and smiled uncomfortably hard. "Hey guys! I have a joke!"

"What's he talking about?" said Pikachu to Jigglypuff.

"I dunno," said Jigglypuff, "Let's just stare at him and listen intently!"

"Okay…" said Fox, snickering, "A midget got pick-pocketed the other day… how could anyone stoop so low?"

Jigglypuff and Pikachu looked at each other. "What's he saying?" said Pikachu, scratching his head.

"I dunno," said Jigglypuff, flicking through her phrasebook. "Something about a body…"

"Oh! Bodies are fun!" laughed Pikachu, "Remember when we disposed of Fox's father's body?"

"Yeah!" laughed Jigglypuff, "But remember… we put him through the blender just before an end to his splendour!"

Jigglypuff and Pikachu chuckled heartily at their bafuffling jousting.

"See?" said Fox to Samus, poking his tongue out.

Snake and Yoshi
Accountancy Students

"We're in the Kanto Air queue, and it's just taking forever," said Yoshi, "I think this is going to be a long leg…"

Mewtwo and Falco
Martial Arts Experts

"We have to do something about this queue," said Falco, leaning on his trolley.

"Borrow someone's phone," said Mewtwo.

"Hey, can I borrow your phone?" said Falco to a nearby businessman.

"Sorry," said the man, his cell phone placed on one ear, "I'm busy talking-"

Falco took his phone and called the airline. "Hello?" said Falco.

Bowser and Ness
Father and Son

"This line is really long, Dad," said Ness, stepping into the Kanto Air queue.

Mewtwo and Falco
Martial Arts Experts

"Falco's speaking over the phone right now," said Mewtwo to the camera.

"There's only a few seats left for the 2:00?" said Falco, "Well… can I get another flight to Kanto on this airline?"

Falco pressed the phone closer to his ear. "Okay, can you put two tickets on the 2:00 PM flight under Falco Lombardi?"

"Ha, ha," laughed Mewtwo, "What a cute surname."

"Shut up, Mewtwo Schneebly!" said Falco angrily.

Mewtwo cried.

Bowser and Ness

"We're suspicious of Mewtwo and Falco, they're up to something… we can't see them…" said Ness.

Mewtwo and Falco
3
rd on 2:00 Kanto Air Flight

"We're now on the 2:00 flight," said Falco smugly, "Snake and Yoshi and Bowser and Ness don't know about booking over the phone, so… we're doing good."

Bowser and Ness
Father and Son

"Hey, is that Mewtwo and Falco?" said Ness, pointing to a bird and a psychic bird briskly walking across the terminal towards them.

"Yeah, it is," said Bowser. "Hey!"

"We got tickets already…" said Falco, walking past, "There's heaps of seats on the 6:00 flight! Stay here! We'll all be on the same flight!"

"Thanks, bud!" said Bowser happily.

Mewtwo and Falco walked past.

"I don't trust those guys…" said Ness.

"Yeah," said Bowser.

Snake and Yoshi
Accountancy Students

"So can we get any tickets on the airline?" said Snake.

"We can get you onto the standby list for the 2:00 flight, but I'm guessing right now you'll get on the 6:00 one," said the agent.

"We'll take that, then," said Snake.

2:00 Kanto Air Flight

Jigglypuff and Pikachu

"We're on the first flight with Fox and Samus," said Jigglypuff happily, "But it hasn't left… I think everyone else is desperate to get on standby…"

Standby Counter

Snake and Yoshi waited anxiously at the standby counter.

The gate agent walked up to them.

Dramatic music played.

"No seats are to be given out!" said the gate agent cheerfully.

"Damn it!" said Snake angrily.

1st Flight
Departed at 2:06 PM

Jigglypuff and Pikachu
Dating Pokemon

"To the first flight!" said Jigglypuff happily, holding up a champagne glass.

Turbulence caused the plane to shake, spilling the champagne over Jigglypuff.

"…hey!" said Jigglypuff angrily.

Last Flight
Departed at 6:12 PM

Snake and Yoshi

"We're almost done for, Snake," said Yoshi.

"All teams are now flying to Goldenrod City through two separate flights!" said Master Hand. "On the first flight, landing at 8:30 AM is Jigglypuff and Pikachu, Fox and Samus and Mewtwo and Falco! Snake and Yoshi and Bowser and Ness are on the second flight, landing at 12:30 PM!"

Goldenrod City

1st Flight
Landed at 8:34 AM

Mewtwo and Falco
Currently in 1
st Place

"Awesome, first out," said Mewtwo, hopping into a taxi.

"Hey! We have a Clefairy taxi driver!" commented Falco happily.

"That's a… Munchlax…" said Mewtwo, "Driving our taxi…"

"Pfft, all Pokemon are the same," laughed Falco.

"…they're all so stupid…" laughed Falco under his breath.

Munchlax and Mewtwo stared at Falco angrily.

"He said it!" said Falco desperately, pointing to Munchlax.

Mewtwo beat Munchlax up with his sharp claws, causing nobody to control the taxi and send it heading towards what seemed to be the edge of a very steep cliff.

"Heh, heh," laughed Falco smugly.

Jigglypuff and Pikachu
Currently in 2
nd Place

"Wow, it's so great to be back in the homeland!" said Jigglypuff happily.

"Yeah," said Pikachu nervously, "I just don't… really like taking taxis in this city, that's all!"

Their Wigglytuff taxi driver gave Pikachu an angry look.

"Look! You've annoyed the Wigglytuff!" said Jigglypuff angrily, "Way to hurt her feelings!"

"I'm just saying!" said Pikachu angrily, "The pink foil covering the entire front windshield is kinda… obscuring your vision and jeopardising our safety!"

"Oh! I think the foil is nice!" said Jigglypuff angrily.

"Yeah!" said Wigglytuff angrily.

They crashed into a building.

"…ow," said Jigglypuff.

Fox and Samus
Currently in 3
rd Place

"Wow, this city is great!" said Fox happily, admiring the Pokemon gyms and buildings they passed as they sped through the highway.

"Poliwhirl!" said their Poliwhirl taxi driver.

"Hey Poliwhirl," said Fox sexily to their Poliwhirl taxi driver, "…would you like to… Poliwhirl my… privates?"

"No," said the taxi driver.

"Please?" said Fox, undoing his zipper.

Poliwhirl pushed Fox out of the taxi.

"I'm never trusting Pokemon again!" cursed Fox angrily, standing up onto the highway.

A Clefairy driving a steamroller approached Fox.

"Oh Clefairy…" said Fox sexily, "You really do… roll me over…"

The Clefairy drove over Fox, who was standing in the middle of the road.

"EDIYWQBUI!" screamed Fox, dying.

Goldenrod Bike Shop

Mewtwo and Falco

"Wait here!" said Falco, jumping out of his taxi.

They walked into the bike shop.

"Find the clue…" said Mewtwo.

Jigglypuff and Pikachu

"Clue time!" said Jigglypuff excitedly.

Jigglypuff opened a door, and spotted the clue box.

"Yay!" said Jigglypuff, opening the clue.

"Detour!" read Jigglypuff, "Beat 'Em or Eat 'Em?"

"Detour!" said Master Hand, "A detour is a choice between two tasks, in this detour: Beat 'Em, or Eat 'Em!"
"In 'Beat 'Em', teams must take a tandem bike from the shop they are in and race two Pokemon on another Tandem bike through a fourteen kilometre course! This task may seem intimidating, but most of the competitors they will face have either never ridden a bike before or are physically inept!"
"However, if teams are uncoordinated enough to lose, they must double back and ride back to the starting point for their next clue!"
"In Eat 'Em, teams must walk one hundred metres to this eatery and participate in a traditional local banquet where Pokemon eat other Pokemon! To receive their next clue they must eat four local delicacies: Chilli Con Cacnea, Clefairy Taco, Spinda Spring Rolls and Wigglytuff Bread! Teams of course, have no idea what they are eating beforehand."

"Ooh! Let's eat a local delicacy!" said Jigglypuff and Pikachu excitedly in unison.

Mewtwo and Falco
Currently in 2
nd Place

"Oh, damn it," said Falco, running back and taking a clue from the front of the store. "Detour! Beat 'Em or Eat 'Em?"

"Let's eat," said Mewtwo.

Fox and Samus
Currently in 3
rd Place

"Let's do a bike ride!" cheered Fox.

Earl's Eat Other Pokemon Eatery

Jigglypuff and Pikachu
On Eat 'Em

"Uh…" said Pikachu, pointing to the restaurant sign, "I'm… not so sure about this task anymore…"

"Relax!" said Jigglypuff, "You're just being a wuss!"

"Uh… have you seen the sign?" said Pikachu uncertainly.

"Whatever! Let's be adventurous!" said Jigglypuff happily.

Mewtwo and Falco
On Eat 'Em

Mewtwo and Falco sat down.

"Mmm," said Falco loudly to Jigglypuff and Pikachu, who were sitting across from them, "I do sure hope that they serve us some Jigglypuff Ribs and some Pikachu Soup!"

Mewtwo and Falco laughed heartily.

"…what are they talking about?" said Jigglypuff.

"Uh… Jigglypuff… you do realise that in this restaurant… they're serving Pokemon, right?" said Pikachu.

"Oh, Pikachu! You're such a kidder!" laughed Jigglypuff heartily.

Bike Race

Fox and Samus
On Beat 'Em

"Ready…" said some random guy with a pistol, "Set…"

The guy shot the pistol.

The two teams, Fox and Samus and two Psyducks on their respective tandem bikes, set off from the starting line of the bike course.

Fox and Samus, several metres in front of the Psyducks pedalled along smoothly.

"So…" said Fox sexily, pedalling at the back of the bike, "…I'm behind you… maybe this could lead into some…"

Fox panted sexily, "Back… door…"

Samus elbowed Fox in the face, sending him falling off the bike and breaking his teeth on the ground.

"Hah, hah, hah," laughed Samus heartily, stopping the bike.

The two Psyducks passed Samus's bike.

"Damn it!" said Samus angrily.

Earl's Eat Other Pokemon Eatery

Jigglypuff and Pikachu
On Eat 'Em

"First course… Chilli Con Cacnea!" said the waiter, serving out two dishes onto the table.

"Ooh! What's in this?" said Jigglypuff excitedly.

"Cacnea. It's a Pokemon," said Pikachu bluntly.

"Oh Pikachu, you're such a kidder!" laughed Jigglypuff.

Mewtwo and Falco
On Eat 'Em

"Come on, chew down hard," said Falco, violently forcing the spicy dish down his throat.

Bike Race

Fox and Samus
On Beat 'Em

"Come on, Samus!" cheered Fox, "We can catch up!"

Fox and Samus pedalled hard, catching up to be side-to-side with the two Psyducks.

Samus elbowed one of the Psyducks in the face, causing their bike to fall over.

"Hah, hah, hah!" chuckled Samus heartily.

They crashed into a tree.

"Damn it!" said Samus angrily.

Earl's Eat Other Pokemon Eatery

Mewtwo and Falco
On 2
nd Course

"We're done," said Falco.

"Good job, we're miles ahead of the Pokemon."

Jigglypuff and Pikachu
On 1
st Course

"Come on, Jigglypuff, chew hard," said Pikachu supportively.

Mewtwo and Falco's second course came out, Clefairy Taco.

"What's that?" said Jigglypuff excitedly.

"Clefairy Taco," said the waiter.

"Uh…" said Jigglypuff, worried, "I'm not sure this joke's that funny anymore…"

"We're eating Pokemon," said Pikachu.

"Stop fooling around!" said Jigglypuff angrily.

Bike Race

Fox and Samus
On Beat 'Em

"We're about half a kilometre in front of them," said Samus happily, "I think we've basically got this in the bag…"

The wind blew a newspaper onto Samus's face, blinding her.

"Damn it!" said Samus angrily.

"Dude, just… remove it," said Fox.

"I'll remove you!" said Samus angrily, unseating Fox.

"Ow!" screamed Fox, falling onto the ground and getting run over.

Samus didn't have a partner.

"Damn it!" said Samus angrily.

Earl's Eat Other Pokemon Eatery

Jigglypuff and Pikachu
On 2
nd Course

Jigglypuff and Pikachu got served their Clefairy Taco.

"That looks like Clefairy…" said Jigglypuff uncomfortably, "…I don't like eating things that resemble Pokemon… take it away!"

"Jigglypuff!" said Pikachu angrily, "We've been eating Pokemon, okay?"

"It's not funny anymore!" said Jigglypuff angrily.

Mewtwo and Falco
On 3
rd Course

"Mmm, these spring rolls are nice," said Falco, chomping away. "Who knew how easy this task could be?"

Bike Race

Fox and Samus
On Beat 'Em

"Here's the finish!" said Fox excitedly.

They crossed the finish line.

"Hurrah," said Samus in a monotonous, low voice, taking the clue.

"Take a taxi to Goldenrod Department Store!" read Samus, "Warning! Yield Ahead!"

"Teams must now go to this department store, where they will find their next clue!" said Master Hand, "Here is the fourth of five yields on the race, in which a team can stop another team for a predetermined amount of time! When teams choose to yield another team, the yielded team must flip over this hourglass and stop racing until it runs out! Teams may only use their yield power once, so they must decide when it is most applicable!"

"Let's get a taxi," said Samus.

Earl's Eat Other Pokemon Eatery

Mewtwo and Falco
On 4
th Course

"Here's your final dish… Wigglytuff bread!" said the waiter.

The waiter presented a dish with a raw Wigglytuff on it, a piece of cheap white bread buttered onto its belly.

"We're supposed to eat that?!" said Mewtwo, outraged.

Jigglypuff and Pikachu
On 3
rd Course

"We're eating POKEMON?!" screamed Jigglypuff, outraged.

"…uh… yeah…" said Pikachu.

"Why didn't you tell me this before?" cried Jigglypuff, "You mean I've been eating Clefairy and Cacnea this whole time?"

"…uh… yeah…" said Pikachu.

"I hate you!" said Jigglypuff angrily. "I quit!"

Pikachu sighed.

Jigglypuff quickly nibbled on her spring rolls a bit more.

Jigglypuff ate up her whole plate.

"Fine!" said Jigglypuff angrily.

Downtown Goldenrod City

Fox and Samus
Entrepreneurs

"We just looked at a local map," said Samus angrily, sitting in her taxi, "And the other teams only have to travel two kilometres to this store, we have to travel sixteen. We might get yielded, who knows?"

Earl's Eat Other Pokemon Eatery

Mewtwo and Falco
On 4
th Course

"This is kinda… gross…" said Falco, munching down on the fresh blood and flesh of the now dead Wigglytuff.

They finished.

"Dude..." said Mewtwo, "you just ate raw meat..."

"OMG BLOOD!!1" cried Falco, swooning.

Mewtwo and Falco
Currently in 2
nd Place

"Take a taxi to Goldenrod Department Store!" read Falco, "Warning! Yield Ahead!"

"Let's yield somebody," said Mewtwo, "This is our leg to shine!"

Jigglypuff and Pikachu
On 4
th Course

"Actually, this is kinda nice!" said Jigglypuff, eating away at the Wigglytuff.

"Eat my thighs first!" said Wigglytuff happily, "It's the juciest and tenderest-"

The Wigglytuff died from blood loss.

"Nooo!" cried Jigglypuff, "I never found out why I needed to get the thighs first!"

Mewtwo and Falco

"I cannot see a taxi in ages," said Falco angrily, jogging down the street in search of a cab.

Fox and Samus

"We just have to hope we get to this place first, and yield somebody…" said Fox.

Jigglypuff and Pikachu
On 4
th Course

Jigglypuff and Pikachu finished.

Pikachu took the clue. "Take a taxi to Goldenrod Department Store! Warning! Yield Ahead!"

"Darn it! I wish we hadn't yielded Link all those legs ago!" said Jigglypuff, running along.

Mewtwo and Falco

"There's a freaking cab!" said Falco angrily, getting into a taxi.

Jigglypuff and Pikachu

"Yay!" said Jigglypuff, hopping into a taxi. "Take us to Goldenrod Department Store!"

Fox and Samus

They drove past the bike store.

"Hey! That's where we just were!" said Fox.

Jigglypuff and Pikachu

"That's… another team in front of us!" said Jigglypuff.

Mewtwo and Falco

"Oh my gosh! Our taxi driver sucks!" said Mewtwo angrily, "Freaking turn left already!"

"Fine!" said the taxi driver, shooting the red and sneaking a left turn in.

Fox and Samus

"Oh my… that's Jigglypuff and Pikachu behind us," said Fox.

"Who says, 'oh my?'" said Samus angrily. "Oh my gosh! It is them!"

Jigglypuff and Pikachu

"It's gonna be another yield race!" said Pikachu angrily.

Mewtwo and Falco

"That's Jigglypuff's cab in front of us!" said Falco, shocked.

"We can outrun these guys!" said Mewtwo.

Fox and Samus

"Wait! Is that another team?" said Fox, pointing two cabs back.

"Just run!" said Samus, "We're getting out soon!"

Jigglypuff and Pikachu

"There's another team!" said Jigglypuff, pointing behind.

Fox and Samus

Fox and Samus jumped out.

"Run! Run!" screamed Fox, sprinting.

Mewtwo and Falco

"We can outrun these guys!" said Falco, sprinting towards Fox and Samus.

Jigglypuff and Pikachu

"Come on, Pikie!" said Jigglypuff, being passed by Mewtwo and Falco.

Fox and Samus

"The yield's upstairs!" said Fox excitedly, pointing to a mat at the stop of a fancy spiral staircase.

Mewtwo and Falco

"We're gonna beat you guys!" said Falco, running up the stairs next to Fox and Samus.

Jigglypuff and Pikachu

Jigglypuff and Pikachu hopped into an elevator.

Yield

Lots of fancy camera angles.

Jigglypuff and Pikachu emerged from the lift. They took a '1' counter and stood on the mat.

Jigglypuff and Pikachu
Currently in 1
st Place

"We've used our Yield powers before, so we can't yield!" said Jigglypuff.

Falco, inches in front of Samus, sprinted towards the yield mat, fumbled, and took a '2' counter.

Mewtwo and Falco
Currently in 2
nd Place

"We choose to yield Fox and Samus!" said Falco, posting his name on the board.

"I hate you guys!" said Fox angrily.

"We're evil, that's what we do," laughed Falco.

Jigglypuff and Pikachu
Currently in 1
st Place

"Drive to Violet Gym!" read Jigglypuff.

"Teams must now take a marked car from the car park and drive forty-seven kilometres to this place, Violet Gym!" said Master Hand. "Once here, they must find their clue outside the front door!"

"Let's go!" said Pikachu.

Mewtwo and Falco
Currently in 2
nd Place

"Drive to Violet Gym!" read Falco.

"See ya, suckers!" said Mewtwo.

Fox and Samus
Yielded

"Oh, this is annoying," said Fox angrily.

"Don't worry, they haven't won a leg yet," said Samus, "They've used both of their opportunities already and failed… they'll be out of this race soon…"

Jigglypuff and Pikachu

"We got to the mat first, which is lucky," said Pikachu, hopping into their car, "We've been lucky with Yields… we shouldn't have used our power that early."

Mewtwo and Falco

"This basically makes it a two way fight between us and the puffballs," said Mewtwo.

Johto Airport

2nd Flight
Landed at 12:40 PM

Bowser and Ness
Currently in 4
th Place

"We just got out of the airport before Snake and Yoshi," said Bowser, panting, "We have to get any edge we can now, it's fierce…"

Snake and Yoshi
Currently in Last Place

"We're in last place right now…" said Yoshi, "But we're basically… just against an old guy and his kid so we can beat them any day."

Jigglypuff and Pikachu

"We're pretty familiar with this area," said Pikachu, driving along, wearing his sunglasses, "I've actually done this drive before from Goldenrod to Violet, so… I think we'll be there pretty quickly…"

Mewtwo and Falco

"Now that we've Yielded one team, we have to beat the Pokemon for first place," said Mewtwo, driving along.

"I wonder how those guys are going?" said Falco.

Fox and Samus
Currently in 3
rd Place

"Drive to Violet Gym!" read Fox.

"Let's use the internet to get directions…" said Samus.

Goldenrod Bike Shop

Snake and Yoshi
Currently in 4
th Place

"Detour!" read Snake, "Beat 'Em or Eat 'Em?"

"Hmm…" said Yoshi, "This is going to be a tough one…"

"I've an idea!" said Snake proudly, holding up an electronic device with a screen, "We shall use this electronic Magic 8-Ball to decipher which task to do!"

"But-"

"Hush hush, Yoshi," said Snake in an English accent, "We shall listen to the wisdom of the Magic 8-Ball!"

"But-"

"Be quiet…" said Snake, looking around shiftily, "…I must ask the question into the magic 8-ball. Oh, wise Magic 8-Ball, point us to which task we shall do!"

Snake pressed a button.

"YES?!" screamed Snake dramatically.

Dramatic music played.

"But-" said Yoshi.

"ARE YOU DENYING THE POWER OF THE MAGIC 8-BALL?!" screamed Snake, his rabies causing his mouth to foam.

"…y… yes?" said Yoshi, cowering into a corner.

"Then I only have one choice…" said Snake dramatically, taking out his gun.

Snake shot Yoshi.

"Hah, hah," laughed Snake, "…what a hearty joke."

"Yoshi," laughed Snake, "You can get up now."

"Yoshi?" chuckled Snake.

Yoshi didn't move.

"WAKE UP, BITCH!" screamed Snake, shooting Yoshi several times in the abdomen.

Goldenrod Internet Cafe

Fox and Samus
Entrepreneurs

"I'm using a site called 'PokeMaps' to print out directions on where we want to go," said Samus, "All I know is that the maps here are-"

"YES! YES!" screamed Fox, looking slyly at another computer, "Strip, baby! Strip!"

"What the hell are you doing, Fox?" said Samus angrily.

"Oh…" said Fox slyly, "Just using… the cyberspace… and using cybersites on the cyberscreen to chat on weblogs to hot babes on web cameras," said Fox, sounding all technical, stroking the fur on his chin slyly as he looked at Samus.

"…you have no idea how to use the internet, do you?" said Samus.

"No!" cried Fox, "I'm stuck on Google!"

Johto Highway

Jigglypuff and Pikachu

"We're almost there…" said Pikachu, pointing to a sign on the side of the highway.

Mewtwo and Falco

"We just caught up to the puffballs and we're just tailing them," said Falco.

Fox and Samus

"Traffic's banked up on that highway," said Samus, pointing to the traffic-jammed highway on their right. "We're using some side streets and I think we'll get there quicker."

Goldenrod Bike Shop

Bowser and Ness
Currently in Last Place

"Let's Eat 'Em! I love to eat!" said Bowser, patting his stomach happily. "I consume video game heroes day in and day out!"

"Dad, you're a vegan!" said Ness.

"I'm trying to maintain my hardcore image!" said Bowser angrily, "And besides, you're going to be eating everything!"

Quizzed Ness, "What do you mean, I'm going to eat everything?"

"Like so!" said Bowser, shoving a bike pump down Ness's throat.

"See son?" said Bowser happily to his choking son, "You're a great eater! It runs in the family!"

"Help me…" moaned Ness, choking.

"Mamby pamby," laughed Bowser, shoving his son with one hand onto the concrete floor, "Hah, hah, hah!"

Violet City

Mewtwo and Falco

"We're in the main town now, so we just passed the Pokemon," said Mewtwo, driving along.

Jigglypuff and Pikachu

"Oh my gosh! Those cheaters!" said Jigglypuff angrily, "They've been following us the whole time!"

"It's not like we've got a clean sheet…" said Pikachu, "I mean, what about… this?"

Pikachu pointed to the anchor attaching their car to a bus bound for Olivine City.

"That's not cheating! That's being resourceful!" said Jigglypuff proudly, "I knew from past experience that this bus passes through Violet City, so we basically get a free ride!"

"So uh… now that we're in Violet City and there's an anchor attached to the bus in front of us that's going to a completely different city… what are we supposed to do now?"

"Uh…" said Jigglypuff nervously.

Jigglypuff smacked Pikachu. "Bad planner!" she said angrily.

"I'm not the one who wanted to cheat!" said Pikachu angrily.

"That's not cheating! That's being resourceful!" said Jigglypuff proudly, "I knew from past experience that this bus passes through Violet City, so we basically get a free ride!"

"Jigglypuff, I already told you how your plan was flawed," said Pikachu angrily.

"Oh," said Jigglypuff.

Fox and Samus

"Violet Gym, next left," said Fox, reading a sign, "Good job, Samus!"

They turned into the complex, another marked car following them in.

"Awesome! We caught up!" said Fox excitedly.

Mewtwo and Falco

"What?!" said Falco, shocked, "How did they catch up?"

Jigglypuff and Pikachu

"BAIL!" screamed Jigglypuff and Pikachu, jumping out of their car, dodging several cars on the main road in front of them and running towards the gym.

"Hope we don't have to drive again…" said Pikachu nervously, tugging his collar. Somehow.

Fox and Samus
Currently in 1
st Place

"Road Block!" read Fox, "Who feels like a bit of an acrobat?"

"Road Block!" said Master Hand, "A Road Block is a task that only one person can perform! In this Road Block, that team member must perform tasks done by Pokemon acrobats!"
"That person must go into the gym and climb up four storeys of stairs and jump across to another tower top a distance of twenty metres using a flying trapeze! If teams miss, they will fall on netting below… curse you liability policy… and will have to try the task again! Teams may not swing back so they must go to the back of the line if they miss!"
"There is a line that decides the order at the top of the tower, so teams must try and run up the tower quickly! Once they reach the second tower, they will collect their next clue. From a box."

"I'll do it…" said Fox sexily.

"…how is that a situation to come across as sexily?" said Samus angrily.

"I'll… acrobat you up the backside…" said Fox sexily.

"That's great, now go," said Samus angrily.

Mewtwo and Falco
Currently in 2
nd Place

"I'll do it," said Falco.

Jigglypuff and Pikachu
Currently in 3
rd Place

"I'll do it," said Jigglypuff.

"Jigs," said Pikachu, "Make sure you do this right… because you only have one Road Block after this."

"Sure, honey!" said Jigglypuff sweetly.

"Okay, just abuse your jump or something!" said Pikachu.

Violet Gym

Fox
On Road Block

"Run up those stairs quick!" said Samus, "Don't lose to Falco!"

Falco
On Road Block

"I'll beat you Star Fox…" said Falco angrily, sprinting up the stairs, two steps behind Fox, "I'll beat you… and then I will become captain of… STAR FOX!"

Falco cackled evilly.

"Or Star Falco or whatever," said Falco, running up the tower.

Jigglypuff
On Road Block

"Curse you, slow dash speed," said Jigglypuff, running as fast as she could up the stairs.

Which was really slow.

Like, a step every second or something.

So excruciatingly slow we have to cut to someone else now.

Falco
1
st Attempt

Falco reached a marked board that said 'Line Starts Here' just before Fox.

"Yes!" cheered Falco. "In your face, Fox!"

Falco jumped onto the flying trapeze and flew across the top of gym. Falco let go, landing several metres short.

"Damn it!" screamed Falco angrily.

Fox
1
st Attempt

Fox clumsily jumped and missed the flying trapeze, falling to the ground.

Jigglypuff
On Road Block

"One storey!" cheered Jigglypuff happily, walking up more stairs.

Earl's Eat Other Pokemon Eatery

Bowser and Ness
On 4
th Course

Snake and Bowser stared at each other angrily, munching down their final courses, staring at each other in the eye.

"We hate to compete with Snake and Yoshi," said Ness to the camera, chewing, "I mean, they're nice people but we just have to compete right now…"

Bowser finished up his Wigglytuff.

"Awesome, Dad!" said Ness, taking a clue.

Bowser and Ness ran out of the

"Take a taxi to Goldenrod Department Store!" read Ness, "Warning! Yield Ahead!"

"Son, we might have to use it," said Bowser, getting into a taxi.

Snake and Yoshi
On 4
th Course

"This dish is so big…" said Yoshi, the Wigglytuff only half-eaten, "And we're in last place right now… I think this is it. I think we're done for!"

"You're starting on the wrong side," said Wigglytuff. "You should have saved my head for last. Now look what you've done. NOW LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE!"

Violet Gym

Falco
On Road Block

"Come on," said Falco, running up the stairs, passing Jigglypuff again, "Beat Fox again!"

Fox
On Road Block

"I'll get you, Falco!" cursed Fox, jogging up the stairs, passing Jigglypuff.

Jigglypuff
On Road Block

"Two storeys to go!" cheered Jigglypuff happily.

Falco
2
nd Attempt

Falco leapt and grabbed the flying trapeze. He flew across the air, releasing and missing the other edge by several inches.

"Darn it!" said Falco angrily.

Fox
2
nd Attempt

Fox heroically leapt onto the trapeze, grabbed it and made a leap for the other side.

He hit his head on the other end platform, causing him to topple backwards and fall on the netting below.

Jigglypuff
On Road Block

"One to go!" cheered Jigglypuff, walking up more steps.

Falco
On Road Block

"I'm so damn tired," said Falco, panting, walking up the stairs, "I'm not a long distance guy like Fox. I could only beat him in a sprint…"

Fox
On Road Block

"See ya, team buddy!" said Fox cutely, passing Falco.

Jigglypuff
On Road Block

"Almost there!" cheered Jigglypuff, on the top floor, the start of the queue just metres in front of her.

Fox
On Road Block

Fox sprinted past Jigglypuff with just inches to go. With the momentum of the sprint, he grabbed the trapeze, zoomed through the room and landed on the other side.

"Yes!" cheered Fox, taking a clue.

Fox and Samus
Currently in 1
st Place

"Take a taxi to the pit stop, Earl's Pokemon Academy!" read Fox, running down the stairs.

"Teams must now take a taxi 1.5 kilometres to this place, Earl's Pokemon Academy!" said Master Hand. "This school for young Pokemon Trainers, is the eighth pit stop in a race around the world! The last team to check in here, may be eliminated."

"Come on, Fox!" shouted Samus from below.

Jigglypuff
1
st Attempt

"Just puff!" screamed Pikachu from below.

Jigglypuff, abusing her seemingly unlimited jumps, started to puff up and jump across the twenty metre jump, passing the flying trapeze.

"You have to use the trapeze!" said a judge below.

"Fiine," said Jigglypuff angrily, puffing back and touching the flying trapeze.

Jigglypuff jumped up again and puffed onto the other platform, taking a clue.

Jigglypuff and Pikachu
Currently in 2
nd Place

"Let's go!" cheered Jigglypuff, taking a clue and jumping off the platform.

"Take a taxi to the pit stop, Earl's Pokemon Academy!" read Jigglypuff, falling onto the ground.

Fox and Samus
Entrepreneurs

"Come on! We need a freaking taxi!" said Samus nervously, dancing around the street, peering down the highway nervously.

Jigglypuff and Pikachu
Entrepreneurs

"Run!" said Jigglypuff desperately, lugging along her bag, "We can beat them! They don't have a taxi!"

Mewtwo and Falco
Currently in 3
rd Place

Falco, having taken his clue, jumped off the tower and landed on the netting.

"You idiot!" said Mewtwo angrily, "We could have won!"

"Take a taxi to the pit stop, Earl's Pokemon Academy!" read Falco, running out the door.

Fox and Samus

"Taxi!" said Samus, holding out her hand.

A taxi stopped on the curb, right next to Fox and Samus.

"Good!" said Samus, opening the door.

Jigglypuff and Pikachu snuck through Samus's legs, running into the taxi, closing the door and locking it.

"DRIVE! DRIVE! DRIVE!" screamed Jigglypuff and Pikachu.

Their taxi sped off.

Another taxi pulled up.

"I hate those puffballs!" said Fox angrily, hopping in.

Jigglypuff and Pikachu

"Fox and Samus are behind us," said Pikachu nervously, "Our driver's a Walrein… what seems to be a very slow and cautious driver… this is going to be another footrace!"

Fox and Samus

"I am going to beat those guys to a pulp!" said Fox angrily, cracking his knuckles.

Mewtwo and Falco

"Take us to Earl's Academy!" shouted Falco. "And quick! Big tip!"

"This guy's a speeder!" said Mewtwo excitedly, their deranged taxi driver speeding through the highway.

Jigglypuff and Pikachu

"They're right behind us!" screamed Pikachu anxiously, "They're fuming!"

"Yeah!" said Jigglypuff, shocked, pointing at Fox and Samus's alight state in the taxi behind them.

Earl's Pokemon Academy

Jigglypuff and Pikachu's taxi, followed by Samus and Fox's, pulled into the academy carpark, weaving around the expensive fountain in the main drive.

Jigglypuff and Pikachu

"Run!" screamed Pikachu, throwing notes at Jigglypuff and scampering off.

Fox and Samus

"That's Master Hand!" said Fox, shutting his door and running onto a grassy straight, Master Hand in the distance.

Jigglypuff and Pikachu

"Roll out!" screamed Pikachu to Jigglypuff, miles behind him. "It's a flat path!"

"I will!" screamed Jigglypuff, charging up, Fox and Samus jogging past her.

Pit Stop

Lots of dramatic camera angles.

Pikachu, followed by Samus, scampered onto the mat.

Fox neared the mat, but the speed of Jigglypuff's rollout caused her to speed onto the mat.

"Yeah!" said Jigglypuff happily, giving Pikachu a high-five.

"Jigglypuff and Pikachu, you are… team number one!" said Master Hand.

"Yes!" said Jigglypuff happily.

"And I have some good news for you, you've both won free fuel for life!" said Master Hand.

"Yay!" cheered Pikachu.

"I don't drive but yay!" cheered Jigglypuff.

"Fox and Samus, you're team number two," said Master Hand.

Fox and Samus looked down at the ground, exhausted.

"So Fox and Samus," said Master Hand, "I hear the competition's starting to catch up with you!"

"Yeah, it's fierce," said Samus, "We've been Yielded, we've had taxis stolen, everyone wants us out because well, they know in their hearts that we're almost certainly going to win the prize here."

"Jigglypuff and Pikachu," said Master Hand, "You're the eighth team to win three legs of The Smashy Amazing Race, can this thought help you be the first team to get four legs?"

"Well, we're certainly going to give ourselves the best shot to beat these guys," said Jigglypuff.

Goldenrod Department Store

Bowser and Ness
Currently in 4
th Place

"Drive to Violet Gym!" read Bowser.

Snake and Yoshi
Currently in Last Place

"Drive to Violet Gym!" read Snake.

Pit Stop

Mewtwo and Falco

Mewtwo and Falco stepped onto the mat.

"Mewtwo and Falco, you're team number three," said Master Hand.

"Darn it," said Mewtwo angrily.

"You guys have been up there but haven't won a leg," said Master Hand, "Is this frustrating?"

"Well," said Falco, "We're definitely the best team that's ever gone on this thing, it's just the place doesn't reflect it… but I think it's our destiny to take out the grand prize…"

Falco looked at the camera. "You just watch us!"

Johto Highway

Bowser and Ness
Father and son

Bowser spotted another car in his rear mirror.

"Damn! How did they get out so quick?" said Bowser angrily.

Snake and Yoshi
Accountancy Students

"Oh my gosh, we're still in this!" said Yoshi happily, driving along, noticing Bowser and Ness's car.

Bowser and Ness
Father and son

"I think they're just tailing us now…" said Bowser, "Let's check…"

Bowser moved the car one lane to the right.

Snake and Yoshi

"Follow them closely, Yoshi," said Snake.

"Okay!" said Yoshi, panicking, putting on his indicator and turning into the next lane.

Bowser and Ness

"Okay, they're following us, Dad," said Ness, peering through the back window, "Make a move at the next exit… pass the next exit but then quickly veer in at the last minute…"

Snake and Yoshi

"We have… no idea right now, where we are," said Yoshi.

Bowser and Ness

The exit came up.

"Good, they're tailing us, pass it," said Ness, pointing to the striped are on the left. "Turn now!"

Bowser turned the wheel tightly, squeezing narrowly past a car into the exit.

Snake and Yoshi

"Yoshi! Why didn't you follow them?" said Snake angrily, "You're supposed to be following them!"

"How am I supposed to know?" said Yoshi angrily, "It's not like I had more than a second to react!"

"You're better than this!" said Snake angrily. "Any real driver would do that right!"

"But you're not a real driver!" said Snake angrily, "You're a fake driver! …huh?"

Bowser and Ness

"We're in Violet City now," said Ness happily, checking through the back window, "We just hope Snake and Yoshi are utterly lost now."

Snake and Yoshi

"We're completely ruined!" said Snake angrily, "We've lost it! We're out! We're thirty minutes out of this race!"

"Chill out!" said Yoshi angrily, "We can make a U-turn here!" said Yoshi, pointing to a lane on his right.

Yoshi slowed down the car and started to make the turn.

"Oh no you don't!" said Snake angrily, pulling the steering wheel back to straight again and pushing Yoshi's foot down.

"Snake! We just missed the u-turn!" said Yoshi hysterically, "What was that for?"

"Communism has a 'u' in it…" said Snake angrily, "…and so does U-Turn… that lane obviously was going to send ninja infiltrates from the communists to invade the car and spread hateful and converting messages to us!"

"Snake! You idiot!" said Yoshi angrily.

Bowser and Ness

"Come on, Dad, we're almost there!" said Ness, bobbing up and down anxiously, "We've got this!"

Bowser looked out of the side mirror. "Damn it! We've got a flat!"

"Oh no!" said Ness, shocked.

Snake and Yoshi

"Okay, we're going to make a U-Turn here, whether you like it or not," said Yoshi angrily, pointing to a U-Turn on the right.

"Oh no you don't!" said Snake angrily, straightening the wheel, stopping them from doing a u-turn. "Communism contains an n, and so does U-Turn!"

Snake shivered manically.

"So does Snake," said Yoshi angrily.

"OH GOD!" screamed Snake, pointing his gun to his head.

Bowser and Ness

"Out of all of the times we could have gotten a flat… why now?" said Bowser angrily, taking off a tyre of the car.

"Dad, that's the wrong tyre…" said Ness.

"Maybe I'm changing the wrong tyre just to spite you," said Bowser angrily.

"No you're not," said Ness.

"Maybe I am!" said Bowser angrily.

Snake and Yoshi

"Okay, you don't have to shoot yourself, there's an easy remedy… close your eyes for the next ten seconds," said Yoshi, concentrating on the road.

"Yipee!" said Snake happily, covering his eyes.

Yoshi made a U-Turn.

Snake opened his eyes. "Yoshi! How could you?!" he cried.

Bowser and Ness

"No you're not," said Ness.

"Maybe I am!" said Bowser angrily.

Snake and Yoshi

"Look, it's really close, actually!" said Yoshi excitedly, "We still might be in this!"

Bowser and Ness

"Done!" said Bowser happily.

"Now fix the real frickin' tyre!" said Ness angrily.

"Fine! Oh look at me! I'm Ness!" said Bowser angrily, "I'm a kid! I have no friends!"

"Waah!" cried Ness.

Snake and Yoshi

"Gym Road," said Yoshi, turning in, "The place is close; this is where we should have turned off."

Bowser and Ness

"Done!" said Bowser, hopping in.

"Dad, let's just concentrate on the race…" said Ness, putting his seatbelt on.

"Yeah, sorry son," said Bowser.

Snake and Yoshi

"There's another car!" said Yoshi excitedly, "They have a flat! They have a flat!"

Bowser and Ness

"Darn it!" said Bowser angrily, Yoshi's car zooming past on the right.

"Just drive dad!" said Ness.

Snake and Yoshi
Currently in 4
th Place

"Turn in!" said Snake desperately.

They parked the car and ran towards the clue box.

"Road Block!" read Snake, "Who feels like a bit of an acrobat?"

"I'll do it!" said Yoshi.

Bowser and Ness
Currently in Last Place

"Damn it! How did they catch up so fast?" said Bowser, hopping out of the car and jogging towards the clue box.

"Road Block! Who feels like a bit of an acrobat?" read Bowser.

"I should do it, Dad," said Ness.

"Go son!" said Bowser.

Yoshi
On Road Block

"Ness is coming for you! Run!" screamed Snake from below.

Ness
On Road Block

"Come on, Ness," said Ness, running up the stairs.

Yoshi
1
st Attempt

"Here!" said Yoshi, panting at the top of the tower.

Catching his breath, he ran across and jumped onto the trapeze, swinging across and leaping towards the other side.

He landed inches onto the other tower.

"Good job, Yoshi!" cheered Snake. "Come on!"

Ness
1
st Attempt

Ness jumped onto the trapeze and landed onto the other side.

Yoshi
Finished Road Block

"Hurry, Yoshi!" screamed Snake, Yoshi running down the stairs.

Ness
Finished Road Block

"Jump off!" screamed Bowser, "We'll get a lead if we do!"

Bowser and Ness
Currently in 4
th Place

Ness jumped to the ground while opening the clue.

"Take a taxi to the pit stop, Earl's Pokemon Academy!" read Ness.

Snake and Yoshi
Currently in Last Place

"Take a taxi to the pit stop, Earl's Pokemon Academy!" read Yoshi.

"Beat them out!" screamed Snake.

Bowser and Ness

"There's a taxi!" screamed Bowser, running out of the front door, pointing to a yellow cab in the distance.

Snake and Yoshi

"Run, Yoshi!" said Snake, sprinting, a dozen yards behind Bowser.

Bowser and Ness

"Dad! Don't worry! I'll hold the taxi for you!" screamed Ness, running along, Snake and Yoshi well behind but his father even more.

Snake and Yoshi

"We're gonna have to kick him off the taxi," said Snake.

Bowser and Ness

Ness climbed into the back of the taxi, "Hold this taxi for a few seconds!"

Snake and Yoshi

Snake and Yoshi climbed into the taxi, "Take us to Earl's Pokemon Academy!" said Snake.

"Hold it up! There's still one more!" said Ness desperately, his father about thirty metres from the taxi.

"Here's twenty bucks! Leave!" said Yoshi, throwing a note at the taxi driver.

"Okay," said the learner Psyduck taxi driver, getting slowly into first gear.

"Hurry, Dad!" screamed Ness, his father about fifteen metres away from the taxi.

"Come on, hurry up, you idiot!" screamed Snake angrily.

"I don't take too kindly to insults!" said the Psyduck angrily.

"Shut up, you!" screamed Snake angrily, hitting the Psyduck in the face.

"O- okay…" said the taxi driver, putting his foot on the accelerator.

Bowser was now just metres away from the taxi.

"Leeaaaving…" said the Psyduck slowly.

Bowser grabbed onto the taxi door.

"Riiiight…" said the Psyduck slowly.

Bowser opened the door.

Snake picked up Ness, and threw him out of the taxi.

"DRIVE! DRIVE! DRIVE!" screamed Snake and Yoshi in unison.

The taxi sped off.

Bowser and Ness
Currently in Last Place

"Damn it! There's another cab here!" said Bowser angrily, waddling over to another taxi.

Snake and Yoshi

"Oh no! This is a nightmare!" cried Yoshi. "Our taxi driver can't get out of third gear!"

"But we're awake!" laughed Snake. "How can it be a nightmare if… we're awake?"

Yoshi glared at Snake angrily.

"…oh," said Snake.

Bowser and Ness

"Take us to Earl's!" said Bowser desperately.

Snake and Yoshi

"Oh no, they got a cab!" cried Yoshi, Bowser and Ness's taxi nearing in the distance.

Bowser and Ness

"What a bunch of dishonest people," said Bowser angrily, "I can't believe we trusted those guys."

"Look! We're catching up!" said Ness excitedly, Snake and Yoshi's taxi right in front.

Snake and Yoshi

"This leg has gone from bad to worse…" said Yoshi angrily, Bowser and Ness's taxi passing them on the left.

"How much longer?" said Snake.

"A few hundred metres!" said the driver.

Bowser and Ness

"We're passing them!" said Ness excitedly, Snake and Yoshi's taxi passing into the difference.

"Next left!" said the taxi driver.

"Here!" said Bowser, handing over a five dollar bill, "We might just have enough of a barrier to beat them in a footrace!"

Snake and Yoshi

"No! No!" said Yoshi angrily, their taxi creeping through the road.

Bowser and Ness

Bowser and Ness got out of the taxi. "Run, Dad! Run!" screamed Ness.

Snake and Yoshi

"Get it into gear!" said Yoshi angrily, "Put it into the fourth gear!"

"There's a fourth gear?" said their taxi driver, surprised.

"…YES!" said Yoshi angrily, "There's six!"

"No Yoshi, I'm pretty sure there's only three," said Snake calmly.

"If you drive… a go-kart!" said Yoshi angrily.

"I don't drive a go-kart!" said Yoshi angrily.

Bowser and Ness

"Master Hand's there!" said Ness, running hand in hand with Bowser, the pit stop about a hundred metres in front.

Snake and Yoshi

"It's right here!" said their taxi driver, turning into the complex.

Yoshi threw a few notes at the driver and they ran out.

Bowser and Ness

"Come on, Dad!" cried Ness, jogging along with his father, "We can do this!"

Snake and Yoshi

"Sprint! Sprint!" screamed Snake desperately, his feet digging up the grass in the grassy straight.

Bowser and Ness

"Oh no!" said Ness, checking behind.

"I can do this, son!" said Bowser happily, the pit stop within sight.

Snake and Yoshi

"We're catching up!" said Yoshi, about ten metres behind with forty metres to go.

Bowser and Ness

"You have to push, Dad!" said Ness desperately, the pit stop only metres away, "We have to pick it up!"

Snake and Yoshi

"Push harder! We're gaining!" screamed Snake, only a few metres behind the father and son now.

Pit Stop

Lots of dramatic camera angles.

Snake, sprinting, overtook Bowser and Ness as the last minute to tumble onto the mat first.

Ness ran onto the mat, his father lagging several metres behind.

Yoshi passed Bowser inches before the line, landing on the pit stop first.

Snake, Yoshi, Bowser and Ness stared anxiously at Master Hand.

"Snake and Yoshi," said Master Hand, "You are… team number four!"

"Yess!" cheered Snake and Yoshi happily.

Emotional music played.

"Bowser and Ness," said Master Hand, "…you're the… last team to arrive."

"Yeah, we figured," chuckled Bowser, putting his hand on his son's back.

"And I'm…" said Master Hand, "…pleased to tell you however, that this is a non-elimination leg!"

Shock entered Bowser and Ness's faces.

"Awesome!" cheered Ness, relieved.

"However, there is a twist," said Master Hand dramatically. "As a penalty for coming last, the next leg you will encounter a Speed Bump. This is a task that only you will have to perform… and as this task could be time consuming… it may cost you the race!"

Bowser and Ness
Father and son

"This leg taught us that, if we want to win the million dollars," said Ness, "We're going to have to get up there at the front and not keep on fighting for last."

"This race is no longer friendly anymore," said Bowser, "But those who have been mean to us will be punished."

"You can try as much as you want, but we're fighters, and we'll stay in this race till the end!" said Ness proudly.

Finish Times:

Jigglypuff and Pikachu: 11:48 AM

Fox and Samus: 11:49 AM

Mewtwo and Falco: 11:56 AM

Snake and Yoshi: 4:13 PM

Bowser and Ness: 4:14 PM – Not Eliminated: Will Face Speed Bump

Review! Sorry for the chapter for maybe, not being as good as the others! Only four legs to go! Review your favourites and stuff! Thanks for your reviews, etc! Capitalization! Point out errors, please!

"Next time, on The Smashy Amazing Race…" said Master Hand, "Jigglypuff and Pikachu's relationship hits a new low!"

"SHUT UP, WHALE BOY!" screamed Jigglypuff angrily, sobbing onto the sidewalk.

"And can Mewtwo and Falco escape from the temple of The Gloop?!"

"I like it and that's all that counts!" sobbed Luigi, flaunting his revealing dress.