"Hey," Paul said. Jamie flinched. "Hi," he said quieter.
Jamie looked up at him and then quickly looked back down.
"What? Won't you talk to me," Paul asked gently. Oddly enough he didn't seem angry that she wouldn't talk to him.
"What do you want?" She asked quietly.
"What? I can't come to talk to a beautiful girl without her thinking I want something from her?" He joked. Jamie shifted uncomfortably in her chair, so he changed tactics. "No Jamie. I don't want anything. I was just hoping to talk to you," he said honestly.
Well that doesn't sound right, Jamie thought. "Why?" Why now?
"Why what?" He asked lightly, but Jamie was pretty sure he knew exactly what she meant.
"We've been in the same school since elementary. Why talk now?"
"I just thought that it was time we finally got to know each other. That's all," he said evasively.
Liar! Jamie thought vehemently. Why does everyone think they can lie to me and get away with it?
"May I sit?" Paul asked.
NO! Of course you can't! You sleep with every girl within a thirty mile radius and expect us to suddenly become friends out of the blue?! Life doesn't work that way. The way you treat girls disgusts me.
But of course Jamie was too shy to say that. And he took her silence for permission. His simple proximity made Jamie sick to her stomach. Now-a-days everyone goes around thinking sex isn't a big deal; they can go and sleep with whomever they want to with no repercussions. That way of thinking is unacceptable.
Maybe she was old fashioned, a romantic, or just plain naïve. She still held tight to the belief that sex should be between two people who are committed to each other; between two people who love each other; between two people who promise to be together forever. It wasn't called making love for nothing.
Jamie sighed. Deep down, she knew that her anger wasn't completely intended for Paul. Yes, what he did was awful. She knew that she was really only angry with her mother for cheating and ruining their family. Paul's exaggerated behavior mirror that of her mother's indiscretion, and it was easier to blame a virtual stranger than the woman who gave birth to you. At least it felt that way to Jamie.
Misreading her sigh, Paul asked, "Are you alright? Do you want me to leave?"
Yes! "N-no. You're – you're okay. I was just … thinking."
"About the meaning of life?"
Despite her best intentions, Jamie laughed. "No, no. Nothing that philosophical."
"You know, when I've got thoughts inside of my head that I don't like, I go out on a date and spend some time with a pretty girl." I bet you do a lot more than that. "Wanna get out of your own head? Come have dinner with me? There's this cool bonfire that me and the guys have every now and then. Be my date?" Paul looked at her expectantly.
"I-I don't think that that's a good … actually … ummm … sure. I would love to," Jamie reconsidered.
If my own mother can do something crazy and reckless with a guy, then why can't I?
Sorry this chapter is short. I promise that the next one will be longer. And who knows? We might even come face to face with Elliot? Who wants to see what drama he'll add to the mix?
