Tensions are starting to affect everyone, in ways they can't control.


Roslin watched from the shadows, horrified as everything went wrong. She hadn't wanted to join the team on this mission, but Adam had insisted her telepathy would be needed. Whoever had given Adam the information about the mission had either been setting them up, or had been terribly misinformed.

They had walked into an army of GS agents. And the agents had clearly been waiting for them. Shalimar and Emma were out cold on the ground. At least Roslin hoped they were only unconscious. Brennan and Jesse had both told her to stay behind them, and she had, so far. But all she really wanted was for this to turn out to be a bad dream.

Jess was massed, necessary with the bullets flying around. Sooner or later though, he had to breathe. And that was his downfall. The orange mazing of his massed form faded, and a split second later he went down, a bullet in his chest.

Roslin froze in shock as Brennan turned toward her. She couldn't make herself move, even when his electrical arc sped toward her.

Roslin woke with a muffled scream, guilt and terror clouding her thoughts. Relief that it had been just a dream barely registered. Her first thought was that she couldn't let that dream become reality. It was her fault, or would be. Before anyone realized what she was doing, or what would happen, she had to leave.

Roslin was out of bed and at the door of her room before the dazed and scrambled thoughts even registered. The door opened on the darkened halls of Sanctuary and Roslin slipped into the shadows. Coherent thought was beyond her as she moved down the hall, never realizing her pace was slowing.

Suddenly, she found herself in front of an opening door with no recollection of why or how she'd gotten there. The shreds of rational thought that had started to return fled.


Adam still had the system set to log me out after an hour, so I'd forsaken my favorite computer for my room, even though I couldn't sleep. Between the fading concussion and the events earlier in the day, I had a slight headache, so any serious work was out anyway. Instead I was taking my time looking up some references in some manuals.

Until someone knocked on my door.

Adam would have called me on my comm-link. Since my door was unlocked, Shal would have just walked in. Bren was avoiding me since that morning. Besides,I didn't think they were even back yet. And Emma had taken advantage of the quiet, calling it an early night.

That left only one person, but I'd thought she was sleeping off the near migraine she'd had. Although she was getting more comfortable with me, I couldn't think of any reason for Roslin to be at my door in the middle of the night. I set the manual down and moved to the door, opening it carefully.

Roslin flinched away as the light fell on her. She was panting as if she'd been running. Her eyes were wide, pupils so dilated they looked black. She shuddered with each breath she took and she didn't seem to be seeing what was in front of her. I had the impression that if I wasn't very careful, she'd take off running.

I took a deep breath and let it out slowly, watching her. Keeping my voice gentle was hard, but it was clear I was going to have to coax her. "Roslin? What's wrong?"

She blinked a few times, her mouth opening then closing again as she backed up a step. Shuddering again, she wrapped her arms around her torso. She was dressed in pajama pants and a tank top, and Sanctuary's ventilation systems tended to keep temperatures cool, especially at night. She should have been chilled, but if she was, I didn't think she felt it yet.

Something had scared Roslin to the point she wasn't thinking. I squashed the instinct to pull her into my arms and comfort her. In the state she was in, that would either become part of the waking nightmare she seemed caught up in, or she'd run. Neither was what I wanted. After a few seconds, I took a step back, clearing the door as I spoke. I couldn't believe how calm my voice sounded because I was anything but. "Roslin, It's Jesse. You're safe. You're in Sanctuary. Everything's okay. Come on, look at me."

She shuddered once or twice but her breathing started to even out. Finally she looked at me, and I caught a bit of green, as well as a hint of rational thought. That was an improvement. Now to get her out of the hallway.

"Come on, Roslin. It's okay. You're safe."

I backed up a couple more steps trying to coax her out of the hallway before something else spooked her. "Come on. Everything's okay, but it's safer and warmer in the light."

I wasn't really paying much attention to what I was saying. I was just trying to keep up a flow of words. I focused more on keeping my voice gentle and coaxing. After too long for my comfort, it seemed to be working. Roslin took a few hesitant steps to enter the room. It was clear she was still afraid and not fully tracking reality. She side-stepped as she cleared the door, putting her back to the wall.

I didn't like seeing that behavior, but at the same time, I was grateful. It let me close the door again without getting close enough to spook her. Once the door was closed, I turned to my computer and logged in. A minute later an EM field sprang up around my room.

I'm not a psionic, so I don't need the shield. But Emma is a good friend as well as team mate. She and I spent a lot of time in my room talking. So I'd set up the same shielding that was on her room so she'd feel comfortable. I was glad for the foresight and hoped it would have the same effect on Roslin.

Turning, I leaned against my desk and watched Roslin again. Her breathing had slowed, and as I watched the shudders faded to shivering. Several minutes passed before real recognition reflected in her eyes. She looked around my room, then her knees buckled and she slid down the wall. I could hear choked tears in her voice. "Jesse?"

It was just one word, just my name, but I don't think I'd ever been so glad to hear it. It was hard, but I stayed where I was. "You're safe, Roslin."

A glance showed me a sweat shirt I'd tossed aside was within her reach. "There's a sweatshirt over there. Go ahead and put it on until you warm up."

It was only then she seemed to realize she'd gotten chilled and that told me a lot. Once she had the sweatshirt on, she seemed more comfortable, though I could still see the glint of tears in her eyes. I moved to my bed, sitting on the floor across from her and leaning back against it. She watched me, but when I didn't come any closer, she relaxed some.

"Nightmare?"

Roslin wrapped her arms around her knees and nodded slowly.

"Wanna talk about it?"

She tried, but the words wouldn't come and I saw that unreasoning fear start to resurface. "It's okay, Roslin. You don't have to talk about it."

She took a deep, shuddering breath, but the fear faded again. From the way she was curled in on herself, she wasn't feeling comfortable or completely safe. This time though, I didn't think I was the cause of her fear. Something had lead her to my door, and I suspected it was the trust she was regaining in me.

We were both silent for awhile. After a few minutes, Roslin leaned back, resting her head against the wall and closing her eyes. That put her face in shadow. I couldn't read her expression when she broke the silence, but her voice told me she was feeling vulnerable. I wrapped my arms around a knee to keep myself from going to her.

"I'm sorry, Jess. I just lost it for a bit."

I did my best to reassure her that she hadn't woken me and I didn't mind the interruption. She seemed to be regaining her self-control and that let me relax a little. "Better?"

She nodded and I stood up, finally taking the few steps over to her and holding out my hand. She hesitated before taking it and pulling herself to her feet. Once there, she wobbled briefly and I grabbed hold of her shoulders as gently as I could to steady her. Instead of shying away, she stepped closer.

"I'm scared, Jess." The words were barely audible and she wasn't looking at me.

The combination of stepping closer and her words finally did it and I did what I'd been wanting to since I'd first opened the door. I pulled her close, stroking her back and hair. A knot in my chest unraveled as I held her. When her arms slipped around my waist loosely, my heart missed a beat.

I kept murmuring reassurances, most of them meaningless. It was easy to tell when Roslin's exhaustion started to overcome the adrenaline of the nightmare. She leaned most of her weight against me and I knew it was time to get her to bed. I pulled back slightly, still stroking her back with one hand. With my other hand, I lifted her chin until she could see my face. "You need sleep, Roslin. Your bed or mine?"

She stiffened and tried to pull away, but I didn't let her. Not yet. "If you don't think you can make it back to your room, you can have my bed, Roslin. I'll take the floor."

I was trying to sooth her, but my words didn't have the effect I wanted. She pulled away, putting her back to me. "I can't sleep, Jess."

"Roslin, you're exhausted. You were practically asleep standing up."

Desperation colored her voice. "I can't sleep. It'll just come back."

I ran my hand across my mouth. I'd misunderstood what was upsetting her. I didn't want to think about how bad the nightmare had to have been to make Roslin afraid to go back to sleep. I closed the distance between us and rested my hands lightly on her shoulders. "At least lay down, Roslin. Before you fall down."

She leaned back against me and I had to swallow back all the things I wanted to say.

"Stay with me?" The words were pleading and said so much about how she was feeling at that moment.

I wanted her to be certain, though, given the situation. "Are you sure?"

She nodded, twisting to look up at me. "I feel safe with you, Jess."

My heart leapt and I gave her a crooked smile. "All right. You lay down. I'll pull the chair over."

Her lips thinned and she shook her head. "I'm not stealing your bed. There's enough room for both of us."

For the first time in over a month, I saw a hint of the woman I'd first met. I wasn't sure it was the best idea, but even as I watched, Roslin swayed slightly.

"Stubborn."

That got the barest hint of a smile that faded almost as soon as it appeared. I climbed onto the bed, taking the side next to the wall, then looked at her until she sat on the other side of the bed. She pulled the sweatshirt off, then curled up facing the door. There was a slight tension in her frame and I rolled onto my side, reaching out and stroking her arm lightly.

"You're not alone, Roslin."

She relaxed a touch, and that gave me some hope that she'd get some sleep.

I froze when she laid a hand over mine. Surprise made me inhale sharply as she pulled my arm around her waist. She relaxed and not much later, exhaustion claimed her. I used a voice command to turn off most of the lights. As I watched Roslin sleep, I knew I wasn't going to be getting much sleep myself.

I did manage to get some. I counted it worth the lack though, since I managed to soothe Roslin out of another nightmare before it got too far. As much as I hated to do it, I woke her up on the early side. I didn't think she was ready to have everyone know she'd spent the night in my room, so after checking the security feeds I sent her back to her own room.

I laid back down, but sleep wasn't on the morning's agenda. Instead, my mind replayed what it had been like to hold Roslin and to have her sleeping next to me. I found myself wishing I hadn't sent her back to her room. At the same time, I knew the circumstances had been unusual. It wasn't likely she'd react the same way in the light of day.