Chapter Eight:
Never A Bloodbath When I'm There!
OMG, like I could BARELY sleep at night!
I was like, SOOOO scared of being in the arena! Like seriously! I could DIE! And them, OMG, EVERYBODY, and I freaking mean it! EVERYBODY WILL BE SO DEPRESSED THAT I'M GONE!
Then they'll kill themselves over me!
Omigod! That is like, the most selfish thing EVER! Because everyone loves me, they'll want to follow me into the afterlife or whatever. Like seriously! Love is a really powerful thing! Especially if it involves ME, Butterfly Lila Mockingjay Morgans in it! Like I'm so freaking powerful.
I'm, like, basically the sun to them. Like how the earth and all the other planets revolve around the sun because it's so bright, magnificent, and powerful.* LIKE I'M SERIOUSLY THAT MUCH OF A POWERFUL PERSON!
So when I finally went to sleep (LIKE FINALLY), I used my blessing to contact all my family members and other people I know who all love me very much.
Oh yeah, because of my blessing, I could visit people in dreams. Isn't that like, SO COOL? But that comes as no surprise because I'm ME. DUH! I can't believe people would actually question this. I'M BUTTERFLY LILA MOCKINGJAY MORGANS! Obviously I'm awesome!
Okay, so I went to my family members and I told them that I loved them all very much and all. They were all, like, bawling. Especially my little sister who actually got chosen, Butterfly Lila Morgans, the MUCH LESS PRETTIER ONE!
And I was all like, "It's gonna be okay, Lila!" I tried to sound super cheerful like Effie. It wasn't that hard because I knew my odds of winning was SUPER high! Along with Cato! Plus, I didn't need to join the Career tributes! I'm a natural at everything and I'm like just so super awesome. DUH!
Then I went to all the guys and I was all like, "Sorry guys but I'm in love with another tribute. His name is CATO! And he IS SUPER HAWT!" They all went crying of course but then I did some PG-16 stuff with them in their dreams somehow and they were all happy.
Of course no one is happy until they're marked by ME!
Then I went to visit Gale Hawthorne. You know that hot guy who is Katniss's friend? Yeah, I used to like him but now I could barely remember what he looked like except that he was super hot.
BUT NOT AS HOT AS CATO!
ANYWAYS! So I was all like, "OMG, Gale!"
And then he was like, "Butterfly?" Like he couldn't BELIEVE I was there. WHAT? How could he not? I mean I have a freaking BLESSING so he should know I can do anything in the freaking world! But whatever, our relationship had been over when Gale was being a freaking COWARD by not wanting to be in the Games. Like I know you would die and all but seriously, it's a big honour! PLUS, I got to meet Cato!
"Sorry Gale," I told him as sweetly as I could, "but I'm in love with someone else now."
He was SOOOO SHOCKED! And then he said:
"It's okay Butterfly. You're so perfect that I wouldn't be surprised if the entire world fell in love with you. But before you leave, Butterfly, may I have just one night with you to remember you by?"**
And I was all like "OMG YESSS!" And then we did some steamy M rated stuff that was almost just as good as Cato. But Gale didn't have as many abs as Cato did so it wasn't as steamy. IT WAS ALMOST AS GOOD. But damn!
And then I woke up and felt SOOOO bad. I mean, I like CHEATED on Cato with almost fifty thousand other boys at night! But I felt so good in the morning! It was almost like all fifty thousand boys were sleeping in the bed with ME!
Then Effie woke me up and brought me to some hovercraft. Some other Capitol person injected some tracker on me and said it was to track me or something. But I knew it wouldn't work because my blessing would just rule it out or something.
Anyways, we were placed in this room called the Launch Room. Castor said a few words but I wasn't even paying attention. I was just thinking what I would do once in the AWESOME arena!*
And then they were all like, "You have to step on the cylinder." So I did and I was like, all excited and stuff and I was like SOOOO happy! And my eyes turned purple because obviously I was feeling awesome and sexy and amazing and stuff like that.
Then the cylinder lifted up and I saw the arena! It was like, SOOOO pretty! It was like the woods in District 12 and I knew I was going to totally beat everyone because I'm just awesome like that.
So at the cornucopia, I saw like, a bunch of weapons and I knew I was just going to walk over there and grab some because why run when no one's going to kill you? Everyone was going to kill each other but I was smart and pretty enough not to get caught. I mean, like I'm SOOOOOO awesome!
So the gong rang after sixty seconds and everyone ran to the cornucopia like their life depended on it. EVEN CATO! And I was just like, walking because a girl's gotta save her energy for something else!
Like I KNEW, no one even came after me. And I held up my hands and said, "STOP! You're not supposed to be fighting and killing each other!" Oh yeah, I'm a pacifist. See, it just adds to my super awesome personality. No wonder everyone likes me! OMG, who wouldn't?
So then I got a bunch of weapons and gave them to the other poorer non-Career districts too because I'm like, totally nice like that, LIKE SERIOUSLY. I'm like the NICEST person on EARTH!
And then Cato left the Careers to join FABULOUS me! Because I was like, totally awesome! NO DUH!
And obviously, there's never a bloodbath in the cornucopia when I'm there! Seriously! COMMON-SENSE!
Fun Fact: Butterfly's 'flaw' is that she's a stupid Mary Sue.
*The arena is not awesome when twenty-three other kids are going to die in there, Butterfly.
Hey guys! I'm back! And I'm on vacay soon, so there will be another delay in updates. Reviews are amazing! :D
By the way, the second 'fun fact' is a blog that I'll recommend you to follow! marysuesalwayswin. tumblr. com
It'll have information about this story and the other Mary Sue stories I'll be writing (which is not told on this site because it's just different stories) :p It'll have a lot more bonuses
Did you know?: That District 13 and the Capitol are like Soviet Union and USA in the Cold War. Both worried about nuclear powers and the Capitol runs on socialism like USA (not communism like Butterfly says) and District 13 runs on communism like Soviet Union did before they changed it into socialism again.
And the playlist! Anymore suggestions? :) And definitely more Nicki Minaj songs! :D
