Disclaimer: I do not own the Harry Potter Franchise. If I did, I wouldn't be broke and writing fan fiction.

A/N: Sorry this took so long to post, first life got in the way, then Mother Nature. Hurricane Sandy has knocked out Comcast's service in our area.

A/N: Anything in italics is part of Severus' commentary on the list.


What My Parents Think of My Enemies and Friends:

Severus couldn't imagine that the Grangers would have anything nice to say about the Malfoys; especially because this list appeared to be from just before Hermione's second year, if the next line was anything to go by.

There was an incident today in Flourish and Blotts in which Mr. Weasley and Mr. Malfoy got into a fight. My parents saw the entire confrontation.

Severus was able to vaguely recall Draco and Lucius complaining about the incident later. With a start, Severus realized that this must have been when all the trouble that year had really begun.

1. Mr. Malfoy
== Dad: He's a jerk!

Severus snorted. As far as he was concerned, John was being polite in his assessment of Lucius.

== Mum: That man has a horrifying personality and absolutely no propriety!

'That's a better description,' Severus thought.

2. Draco Malfoy
== Dad: That kid's going to take after his father, that's for certain.

Severus thought that that was a bit off. If anything, Draco was more like his mother in temperament. However, he couldn't really blame John for his assessment seeing as he had only met the boy for the first time.

== Mum: That poor boy! No wonder he's such a menace if his father acts like that!

'I couldn't agree more.'

3. Hagrid
== Dad: That man is bigger than Andre the Giant! I wonder if they're related?

'I doubt it.' Severus remembered seeing the movie Princess Bride when he was 27 years old. He had quite enjoyed it and had been delighted when he found out that it was Hermione's favorite movie as well.

== Mum: Thank goodness he was there to break up the fight. He seems nice enough, and from what Hermione says, he's actually very gentle, like Fezzik.

4. Mr. Weasley
== Dad: A very inquisitive man. A little strange.
== Mum: He is not strange John! He's a kind man who is interested in learning about a world he doesn't know. At least he wants to understand us, unlike some other wizards I can think of. Except for the incident with in the bookstore I think he's rather mild mannered.

Severus had to agree with both John and Jean. Arthur was a very kind man. In fact, Mr. Weasley was one of the few people in the Order who was always polite and never questioned his loyalty (except for the year after Severus killed Dumbledore).

5. Mrs. Weasley
== Dad: Plump and overbearing. No sense of humor.
== Mum: John! She's just being motherly! She's given birth to seven children. I'm sure she knows what she's doing now. She needs to be strict, especially with those twins of hers! I'm sure she has a perfectly fine sense of humor. As far as I could tell, Mrs. Weasley is a kind and caring person.

'Sorry Jean, but Molly is just overbearing. Well... most of the time. She can be kind.' Severus remembered well the many times Molly tried to force a meal on him.

6. Percy Weasley
== Dad: Just like Hermione said he was, proper and probably a hard worker.

'He's a hard worker but also an arrogant prick.'

== Mum: He's also ambitious.

'I always thought that he should have been in Slytherin.'

7. Fred & George Weasley
== Dad: Those two are trouble makers, I could tell.
== Mum: Yes dear, I quite agree, but I suspect that there's more to them then meets the eye.

'Very true,' Severus thought. 'They are actually very smart and cunning.' In fact, Severus had to admit that their pranks were usually quite entertaining.

8. Ron Weasley
== Dad: An interesting kid. He certainly isn't the brightest.

'Yet another understatement,' Severus thought. 'Then again, if Mr. Weasley hadn't been so stupid as to not see what was in front of him, I wouldn't have ever gotten a chance with Hermione.' Severus smirked. 'I guess dunderheads are useful sometimes.'

== Mum: You're right. He isn't the brightest and he can be quite rude.

'Very true,' Severus thought as he scowled.

9. Ginny Weasley
== Dad: She's a shy one.

Severus snorted in amusement. 'Yeah right. Ginevra being shy is as likely as me dying my hair pink on purpose.'

== Mum: She's so innocent looking! That poor girl, can you imagine having to grow up with six older brothers?

'Innocent looking is not the same as actually being innocent.' Severus knew from first hand experience that Ginevra Potter nee Weasley is anything but innocent.

10. Harry Potter
== Dad: Such a kind kid, giving his free books to Miss Weasley.
== Mum: He's just like Hermione described, isn't he? He is sweet and caring.

'While even I will admit that he's caring, he's not exactly sweet.'

Noting that this was the end of the list, Severus moved onto the next one.