Chapter 8
Early in the morning Diego got up again to relieve Felipe from his vigil. After he sent Felipe to his bed, who had been dozing in a chair, he retrieved his place in the chair he and Victoria had occupied the night before.
His father opened his eyes and addressed him as soon as he had made himself comfortable.
"Diego, thank you," his father said in a hoarse voice and reached out with his hand to touch his arm.
"Father, you're awake," Diego said surprised. "What are you thanking me for? How are you feeling today?"
"Except for some pain in the leg, I'm fine. If not for you and Victoria, I wouldn't be here at all. I must thank you for all you did for me and the pueblo." Alejandro saw the surprise on Diego's face when he realized that he knew now.
"You heard my conversation with Victoria yesterday!" Diego was dumbstruck. "I'm sorry, Father, I should have told you much earlier, but I wanted to protect you."
"It's alright, son. It's me who should apologize to you for the way I treated you, not the other way round. You have always been a good son. I had much time to think about everything last night when I lay awake here in my bed. And I must confess that I had a long talk with Felipe, too. After I heard your conversation I figured out that Felipe was your accomplice and he couldn't deny it when I told him that I knew. So don't be angry with him."
"I guess you left him no choice. So are there any questions you haven't asked Felipe yet or is your curiosity satisfied for the moment, Father?"
"I would like to see that cave that you have hidden from me, but I think I'll have to wait until my leg has healed enough. I'm sorry we wasted the last years because of the secrecy and I hope I can be a better father to you in the future."
"Gracias, Father, I'm really glad it's no longer standing between us. If you hadn't listened in yesterday, I would have told you today." Diego stopped, and Alejandro could see that something was bothering him.
"What is it, Diego? Are you afraid, I won't be able to keep your secret? Or upset that you haven't told me earlier?" Alejandro took his son's hand. "Don't worry. I won't say a word, although I think it won't matter anymore since the alcalde was killed yesterday. I'm proud of you, son. If you hadn't saved us together with the soldiers, we'd all be dead."
"Actually, it is yesterday I'd like to discuss. May I ask you something, Father?"
"Of course, Diego. Just ask me what you want to know."
Diego rose from the chair he had been sitting in and began pacing the room followed by his father's eyes before he sat down at the bedside again.
"As Zorro I have always worked alone and never killed anyone. You know that I'm not a military man though I have studied military strategy at the university, but yesterday was different."
"You'd never have been able to overcome the bandits on your own. The truce with the soldiers was the right thing to do. What is wrong with that?"
"The soldiers were under my command and it was my plan. I tried to avoid any killings, but I couldn't prevent it. There were deaths on both sides and I'm the one who is responsible for them."
Diego ran his fingers through his hair before he looked at his father again, displaying the pain he felt. Reaching out for his father's arm, he looked at him pleadingly.
"Please, tell me, Father, when you were a soldier and you sent the men under your command to their deaths, how could you live with that?"
"That is never easy, Diego and I understand that it is bothering you. But trust me, what you did was right. Sometimes there is no other way. It took me some time to find my peace with the deaths I felt responsible for as a commanding officer. Let me tell you of my first command as a young soldier.."
Alejandro began to recount the events of an attack he had commanded at Guernavarca. He hadn't been able to share this with his son who couldn't understand it before, since Diego had lacked the experience to have men under his command and have them die for it.
Thus began a long discussion between father and son with Alejandro trying to relieve his son from the guilt he felt, because of the deaths he wasn't able to prevent.
It wasn't something that could be solved in a single hour and would take some time, but now Diego had his father he could turn to, and Alejandro was happy to help his son, through his own experiences, to cope with the burden.
It was the beginning of many long conversations while Alejandro was recovering, with Diego keeping him company, that mended the relationship between father and son better than any revealed secret ever could.
