Oh my goodness, I am so sorry it took so long to upload! It's been a long, complicated web of reasons I haven't been uploading, but I'm so glad to finally upload another chapter! Anyway, I'm so, so, so sorry, and I hope for all of my complicated technological problems to be fixed soon(computer problems are the latest stage of my complicated web of reasons, and it's still a slight issue), and I can update more frequently! By the way, if you remember where else in this story we saw the name of the Erudite leader in this chapter, PM or review what they were, and I'll give you a shout-out in the next chapter! Well..enjoy!

Age 16, Part 3

"Hi, Jeanine," Mother smiles at me as I walk through the door. Any other day, I'd be so happy to see my mother - who is usually too busy at work until I'm asleep - waiting for me, but I feel too weighed down to be happy. My best friend just died in that horribly barbaric Aptitude Test, and now I have a few hours before my fate is permanently altered. I know I'm staying in Erudite - where Carmella, surely, was going to be as well - but things are definitely going to be different without Andrew, should I be correct in my suspicions about his leaning toward Abnegation, and Carmella.

Without saying anything, I walk up the stairs to my bedroom and flop onto my bed. How could they do this to Carmella? I think bitterly. Someday, I'll create a safe Aptitude Test. For Carmella.

"Jeanine!" Darren runs into my room, looking worried. "I heard about Carmella. You okay?"

I open my mouth to talk, but no sound comes out, so I just hug him. Please, Darren, survive the Test when you're my age. Be safe.

"I know, I know," Darren whispers. I bury my face into his messy dark hair and sob, crying for everything I've held back. He pulls away and looks into my eyes. "You know what you need to do tomorrow, right? For Carmella? For me?"

Stay in Erudite, I think. "Yeah. For you and Carmella." And for me. But not for…Andrew and me, together. I take a deep breath. "Darren, I think I just want to be alone for a bit. I'll see you tomorrow, though," I kiss the top of his head, fluffy like a little kitten, and watch him close the door to my bedroom as he leaves.

For Darren and Carmella, I think, my thoughts taking up my world, restricted around the walls of my bedroom. Darren may be safe here from the Test, but he is in danger still from society. As long as that Test is organized this way, I can lose my brother for no reason whatsoever, other than the primitive ideas of the Faction Test Developers in Erudite.

"Jeanine?" My door cracks open to reveal a ray of light, contrasting painfully with the darkness, and my mother's concerned face. "Can I come in?"

Not bothering to wait for an answer, Mother barges in and sits on my bed. "I'm so sorry about Carmella. Is there anything I can do for you?"

"Nope," I reply quickly. Only I can do something. For the future Carmellas.

Mother raises an eyebrow. "I am your mother, you know. You can tell me anything."

"I know, but…" I hesitate. Mother is always out at work. I can't tell her everything. But I can't tell her she's out of the house too much, like a little child missing Mommy.

"Well," She frowns. "Anyway, get some sleep for the big day."

She leaves, and I try to fall asleep. I toss and turn, my brain stirring around haunting thoughts of Carmella, my Choosing Ceremony, and the fact that I will lose my friend - no, more than a friend. He's, well, Andrew - in a matter of hours.

I must have worried myself to sleep, because my alarm clock goes off at nine o'clock, and I open my eyes lazily, reluctant to let the day seize me and cut me into tiny pieces. But, today, everything seizes me. Life, adulthood and Erudite. Yet, at the same time, so much is letting me go. My childhood, my family - we hardly see them after the Choosing Ceremony - and Andy. He hasn't told me that he's leaving, but anyone can tell by the way he never takes the last peach at lunch, the way he read The Giving Tree all the time as a kid. He is soon to be an Abnegation Transfer, and I am soon to be an Erudite born Initiate.

Finally, I peel off the covers, drag myself out of bed, and put on my nicest outfit - a navy pencil skirt with a baby blue sweater, my typical not-going-into-a-lab-today ensemble for vacation, but this is no vacation

I shuffle into the kitchen for my final meal at home. Mom and Dad are making pancakes and chopping fruit, since work and school are always cancelled on the day of the Choosing Ceremony.

"Looks...good," I murmur sleepily, eying the sliced strawberries on a plate. When Dad bends down to pick up a strawberry he dropped on the floor, I snatch one small, red berry and pop it into my mouth, feeling the sweetness run down my throat.

Mom checks her watch, alarmed. "Jeanine, it's almost time to go! We need to be there at ten!" She finishes cooking the pancakes, hands two to each of us - me, my dad, Darren, and her - and hustles us into the car. When Mom turns the car on and starts to drive, Dad gives Darren and me the plate of bananas, strawberries, grapes, and blackberries, allowing us to chow down and fill our tired, hungry, nervous bellies.

After twenty-some minutes, we arrive at the Choosing Ceremony. The sixteen-year-olds all stand together in complete silence until Bernadette Charles, the Erudite leader, instructs us to sit, in reverse alphabetical order, in black chairs on the stage, behind five basins - one for every Faction. I sit between Karli Massey of Candor and Cameron Naman, a good-looking Dauntless boy with shaggy black hair, dyed with one small, white streak on the side of his head.

"Zenforth, Arielle," Bernadette announces. An Amity girl strides up to the woman, who hands her a knife. A bit hesitant now, Arielle slits her palm, letting her blood drip down her fingertips and drip into the Dauntless bowl. The Dauntless cheer, and Arielle smiles a beautiful, probably overused grin. I can tell she's trying to ignore the murmurs of disapproval in the Amity.

"Zanes, Ari," Bernadette calls, summoning forth an Abnegation boy, who stays in his home Faction. I search Adrian's face, looking for clues to his personality. I hope he and Andrew are friends, when Andy switches to Abnegation. I hope Andy is happy without me, because my life will be tough without him.

Bernadette continues up through the names, from "Zanes, Abby", presumably Adrian Zanes' sister, also staying in Abnegation, to "Prowsfeld, Marie", who switched from Candor to Amity. All too soon, I suddenly hear Bernadette call out, "Prior, Andrew."

He takes a deep breath - audible even from my seat, about eight chairs away - as he stands up, taking the knife in his hands. He immediately makes his way over to the Abnegation basin, then hesitates, the blade resting on his palm, eyes closed in concentration. For a moment, hope surges through my veins. Could Andrew, my Cotton-Andy, after all these years, have decided, at the last second, to stay with me, in Erudite?

The smile is still growing on my lips when I see the blade slide over his hand, the blood dropping and sizzling in the Abnegation basin. For a moment, I can not register what has happened. But then I finally realize: I just watched my love, and best friend, taken away from me forever. My throat feels like an avocado pit has been lodged into my esophagus, and I try not to cry as I listen to the excitement buzzing in the Abnegation section.

As the ceremony goes on, I nearly do burst into tears between "Nolon, Vera" and "Nichowitz, Kathy". I know that, right between the two, I should have been able to see "Nolan, Carmella" joining me in Erudite, but that is only a "what if" now.

In the midst of my silent lamenting, I almost don't hear Bernadette call my name, "Matthews, Jeanine".

This is it. Starting today, I am going to be in Erudite without my best friends. I know, though, that any other Faction would never suit me well. I take a deep breath, exhaling all of my fears, worries, concerns, and overall thoughts that have pestered me, penetrating deep into my soul, for so long. In one short, easy motion, I glide the blade over my skin, and allow a few drops to ooze from the cut and drop onto the Erudite coals.

I look over at Andrew, while the Erudite cheer their deafening roar. Andrew's eyes are dead-set on mine, beckoning me over. I run to Andrew, tears burning in the corner of my eyes like the coals in the basins. Faction before blood, but what is before love?

"I'm going to miss you so much," he murmurs, engulfing me in a hug.

"I'll miss you too, Cotton Andy," I whisper in his ear, the tears beginning to slide down my cheeks. He looks at me, and hugs me tighter.

"Hey, Jean-Bean, it's okay, it'll be fine," Andrew tries to assure me. "This isn't the last time. We will try to see each other as much as we can, okay?"

"I..." My throat gives a strange gasping noise, and I retry speaking. "I don't...want to be...without you."

"I don't want to be away from you, either," Andy tells me, making my stomach feel light and floaty. "Jeanine, I lo-"

Suddenly, he is pulled away by several other Abnegations, running toward Jacob Kay, the Abnegation leader, who is gathering the new members in. He looks at me sadly, and I wave at him one more time before finally giving way to the sobs that were building within me. The other Erudites look surprised as they watch me approach the group of new and old Erudite faces, trying to keep my face down so nobody can see the steady flow of tears.