Dick stayed up all night.

Everything hurt.

Physically, he was sore and bruised in several places, but that was not even the worst of it. Dick could ignore those pains. But he could not ignore the feeling in his chest.

Jason had not denied what Dick said. He had more than enough time to. But he did not. He stayed silent and watched Dick walk upstairs. Maybe... just maybe... Jason really had made the wrong choice?

Fate was not expecting for Dick to be on Earth. She would not expect Love to continue her plan of revenge. She would have to work around these things. Maybe the girl was not supposed to die, but because of Love, because of Death, because of Dick, she did.

The sick turning of Dick's stomach made him close his eyes a moment. He was not feeling sick over the girl's death. He was feeling sick because that is what Jason believed. He was feeling sick because he was the cause of someone's death, not just a witness.

And on top of that, Dick had to shoulder the weight of the fact that Jason was going to die, again, probably because of Dick. He actually felt disgusting in his own skin. Jason, who instinctively pushed Dick out of the way of harm, but regret it later. Jason, the person who showed Dick around the city, and made the past two weeks the absolute best thing that ever happened. Jason, the person Dick put on a pedestal above the sun, the moon, and the stars. Jason, who might not love Dick, but Dick loved more than anything, anyone else.

Jason, who was going to die because of all that.

Dick cursed quietly to the darkness of his room. He screwed his eyes shut. He should have never asked Death to bring him here. Because in doing so, he just sentenced the two people he loved best to a horrible fate they had no control over.

Dick knew how this would all play out. And it was not pretty.

After all, when it came to revenge, only the worst could happen. For Jason, he would meet an early death. For Dick, he would lose Jason. For Death, he would lose Dick. A bitter smile grew on Dick's face.

He thought of his aunts, Love and Fate. They were both physically beautiful, and Dick always thought of them as pretty good people. Love, while sharp tongued and full of witty, sarcastic replies, first introduced Dick to the wonders of Earth. She would tell him the greatest love stories. Only now did Dick realize how they always ended in tragic death and a cold smile from Love. Fate had always been Dick's secret favorite after Death. Fate was funny, bright, and full of joy. She was willing to take risks and lend a listening ear when no one else had the time. She was the only one that treated Dick like he was not broken during the first year he spent at the Palace.

He thought of his uncle, Death's twin brother, Life. Dick did not see Life very often, since Life actually had a lot of work to do. He had no attendants like the reapers at the Palace. He was alone in his Courtyard. Death usually visited the Courtyard instead of Life coming over to the Palace.

While Life was generally more jovial than Death, they were twins. When it came down to it, Life could be a cold and emotionless as Death always seemed. On the other hand, Death had a secret soft side, one he showed in private to a select few. Sometimes, his monotonous voice could soften to a calming drawl, which Dick had grown fond of.

But now that Dick thought about it, everyone but Death was cruel. Love, Fate, Life, all of them. He wanted to sob at that thought.

Dick always considered himself some sort of exception. That he was different from other humans because he knew them personally. But they apparently did not see things the same way as Dick. If anything, they paid more attention to him.

That night, Dick stared at the ceiling until grey light started filtering through his curtains and the birds started chirping outside.


Jason slept in with his door locked the next morning. When he did get up around noon, he walked into the kitchen where Alfred and Dick had been chatting. Dick had a large bowl in front of him and was currently making the salad.

Jason trampled in, took one look at Dick, who opened his mouth to say something, but Jason glared at him and stomped out before he could get a word in.

Dick slumped dejectedly in a chair.

"What did I do, Alfred?" Dick asked the older, wiser man.

"I believe Master Jason is upset at the fact that you did not care that someone had died last night," Alfred said calmly.

Dick scoffed. "But deaths happen every day. No one can stop them. If they were meant to be stopped, they will be stopped. If not, they can't. He knows that."

"You see, Master Dick," Alfred said. "Normally, people believe that can control their own fates and they make their own choices. Jason believed that he could have saved the lady."

"But instead he saved me, I know," Dick grumbled. "Besides, he couldn't have saved her anyway, even if he had tried. I know Fate. She's my aunt. She decided that lady should have died. It wasn't Jason's fault. Nor was it mine."

"No, it wasn't your fault," Alfred said. "But Jason likes placing blame. If not on himself then on someone else. Master Jason was not instituting that it was your fault. He's upset at your lack of empathy."

"Empathy."

"Yes, he's upset the lady died because she also had a family. She had kids and a husband. Now her family, her friends, her parents, they're all suffering. And both Master Jason and Master Tim empathize with that."

"They don't even know the lady."

"No," Alfred agreed. "But that's just human empathy. They're all human, so they all feel on the same level. Besides, both Master Jason and Master Tim have known loss. They've known death. So they empathize."

Dick frowned. "My parents died."

"But you don't remember."

"No, I don't. Not really at least. I remember crying a lot, but after that, I don't remember being sad at all. I just... didn't care anymore. Death wasn't something I cared about. It was superficial. It was just another day to day event for me." Dick sighed heavily. He was silent for a beat.

Hearing Alfred say those words only confirmed what Dick had been feeling inside. He had always known he was missing something, a part of his soul. It never bothered him until now. But of course it would be important now. Still, Dick said, "Hey, Alfred. Thanks... for hearing me out, I guess."

"You're very welcome, Master Dick. I'm always here to lend an ear."

Dick left the salad and wandered the Manor instead. He wound up in the library, where he spent the entire afternoon reading books. It was his last day on Earth. Death was coming to pick him up tomorrow.

Dick sighed heavily and closed the book he was reading. He headed down to the Batcave, glad to find it void of people. Then, he spent two hours venting all his frustration and anger out into the punching bag.

Finally, as dinnertime rolled around, Alfred came to find him. All four of them sat in the small table in the kitchen. Dick pushed miserably at his food, Tim ate sparingly, glancing between Dick and Jason. Jason stabbed viciously at his plate, glaring at Dick the entire time.

As dinner went on silently and slowly, Dick became more and more upset. He had felt it building up for some time now, and there was so much of it he had no idea how much was actually pointed towards Jason. Probably none of it, really.

"Stop glaring at me!" he snapped.

Jason scoffed. "Well, I'd rather not talk to you, so I'm expressing my anger through glaring."

"It's not my fault I don't have a sense of empathy, okay?!" Dick yelled. He could feel the frustrations of that day building up quickly. It felt like it was clogged up in his throat, bursting to get out. "I've lived nearly all my life in the Palace of Death, where all I experienced was exactly that! Death! It was normal for me. It was like seeing people drive down the streets every day for you! It never crossed my mind that people were hurting because of the deaths!"

"Of course you didn't think about it," Jason said, crossing his arms. "You don't seem to think about anything!"

"It's not my fault I'm missing a part of my soul. I didn't know it made a difference in who I was as a person. But apparently it does," Dick choked out. His eyes were clouding with tears. This might be the first time he's cried since his parents' death fifteen years ago. "Apparently that little piece of me that's missing prevents you from loving me. But guess what? Even though I'm broken and defective, I still love you more than anything, Jason Todd, and you've made the past two weeks the best weeks of my life." Tears finally rolled down his cheeks, and Dick could no longer see Jason. He was just a dark blur. Dick took a deep, shaky breath. He stood up, pushing his chair back and wiped at his eyes. "I'm leaving tomorrow anyway. It doesn't matter anymore."

Dick looked up, avoiding Jason. He did not want to see his expression. He did not want to feel that horrible shattering feeling in his heart again. Instead, Dick nodded at Tim and at Alfred.

"Tim, Alfred. Thanks for everything." Dick took a step backwards. "Take care."

It was better this way. Jason might be safer this way. If Dick left now, he could live. He could live and forget and move on, and the entire crisis would be avoided. Dick tried his hardest to convince himself of that. He took another step backwards, memorizing the three blurs in his vision as best as he could.

Then, he fled.