Hey guys! So…towards the ending it gets suggestive but you will understand when you read it :) and there is a big plot reveal in the end! I hope you enjoy! Thanks for reading!

Chapter 8

We all stood in front of Donna's grave and I was asked to sing a song in memory of Donna. I shakily stood in the middle of everyone and began to sing "It's So Hard To Say Goodbye To Yesterday", by Boyz ll Men.

"How do I say goodbye to what we had? The good times that made us laugh, outweigh the bad. I thought we'd get to see forever, but forever's gone away. It's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday." I choked up and started crying a little bit but I kept going. "I don't know where this road is going to lead, all I know is where we've been and what we've been through. If we get to see tomorrow I hope it's worth all the wait. It's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday. And I'll take with me the memories to be my sunshine after the rain. It's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday." I ended the song and I looked around to see everyone staring at me in awe. I grabbed a white rose which was Donna's favorite flower and placed it on her casket.

"I love you Don." I whispered and wiped my tears.

I sat down next to Opie and rested my head on his shoulder, he gripped my hand tightly and looked at the casket.

"That was beautiful Auntie Caroline", Kenny commented and I smiled sweetly at him. I kissed his forehead softly and held him. "Thank you baby." I murmured and tried to remain calm. I didn't want to cry while the kids were here, I had to stay strong for them. Tara got up and walked towards Jax who just arrived. She gave him his cut and gave him a kiss. I looked over to Wendy and saw her scowling at the two of them. Everyone put their flowers on the casket already and Jax was the last one to put his on. The priest said a few words and she was put into the ground. It hurt so much to see it, I felt like my heart was slowly being ripped out. Everyone left and I just stayed there looking at the pile of dirt separating me and Donna. I felt a hand on my shoulder and saw that it was my dad.

"You okay sweetheart?"

My lip quivered and I looked down sadly. "I'm fine Pop…" I breathed and he hugged me.

"Stop trying to be tough, it's okay to be sad, I'm here for you." He grunted and I began to sob. I told myself I would stop crying but I couldn't stop, I felt empty. Who would I be able to talk to now? Who would comfort me when I was sad? I had Juice, but did I want to put that much responsibility on solely him? I couldn't tell my dad or anyone from the club anything because they wouldn't understand. Donna knew me like the back of her hand, I was friends with her since high school, she was like a sister to me.

"Come on Caroline, let's go to the clubhouse. Maybe seeing the idiot will make you feel better", he grumbled and held my hand. He lead me to his motorcycle and we rode back to the clubhouse where all the guys were waiting there for us. Juice came up and helped me off the bike, he didn't say anything to me he just hugged me tightly. I buried my face in his chest and had a tight grip on his vest.

"You sang so beautifully, she would've loved it." He lifted up my chin and kissed me softly. He wiped my tears and I sniffled "You think so?", I asked and he smiled at me.

"I know so."

I hugged him once more and Chibbs and Tig walked up.

"How you doin' lass? We all loved yer song", Chibbs told me and I smirked at him.

"Thanks Chibbs, I'm okay. Just trying to get through the day you know?"

He nodded and Tig gave me a hug. I stiffened up because I had a flashback of the dream and he pulled away.

"I'm so sorry kid. I'm so sorry", he said and I gasped slightly. He said those same exact same words in my dream.

"Baby, you alright?" Juice looked at me concerned and I walked over to the bar. I grabbed a glass and started to pour myself some some tequila, I needed to drink away the pain. I drank a few glasses and started to feel numb like

I did when I got shot in the shoulder. Juice came up and sat next to me, he had a beer in his hand and I sighed.

"You know…I had a dream that I died and Donna was the one that lived. You were on the stand and you were saying how much I meant to you and I felt so heartbroken that I left you… and yet…a part of me was happy that it was me and not her. She had so much to live for, she has kids…why wasn't I the one that died? I can't even look at myself in the mirror without hating myself. I couldn't save her and now I'm stuck here reminded of the fact that I'm here and she's not…" I felt a tear stream down my face and he pressed his lips against mine roughly. I jolted up in shock and he caresses my face looking into my eyes.

"I wouldn't be the same without you, I love you so much and I know it's crazy because we haven't known each other for very long but you're my everything Caroline. Even if you hate yourself, I'll give you a thousand reasons everyday why I love the shit out of you. I'll love you enough for the both of us, but you can't give up on me babe. Please don't give up on me." He pleaded and I held his hands.

"I'll never give up on you Juan. Never ever", I breathed and felt emotionally and physically tired.

"You tired baby? You wanna go to bed?", he asked me and I nodded.

"Will you stay with me?" I asked him and he helped me up. I stumbled from my chair, I was more drunk than I thought.

"Don't I always?" He cooed and I smiled. We went into the room and I went into the bathroom and changed into my pajamas. I came out and Juice was outside telling everyone that he and I were going to go to bed early. He walked in and took off his cut. He closed the door and laid down in the bed with me holding me gently. He didn't want to squeeze me too hard because of my wounds on my shoulder.

"I don't wanna sleep, I feel like if I do you'll be gone again…" Juice whispered and I nuzzled my head into the crook of his neck.

"I ain't going anywhere Juan. I'm here to stay. I love you, good night."

"I love you too babe…night."

That night I had the reoccurring dream of me dying in the car crash. Just as Tig was apologizing to me in my dream I was woken up by the sound of the door swinging open and Chibbs was standing in the doorway. I rubbed my eyes and looked outside, it was morning already.

"Hey Lass, we need Juicy boy for a run. Could you wake 'em up fer us?", Chibbs asked.

Chibbs was about to walk out but I called out to him.

"Chibbs! Wait!" He turned around and looked at me. "I was wondering…on the night of the incident, did anyone leave after me Opie and Donna did?"

He furrowed his eyebrows and thought about it.

"Juice left before ye, and Tig left about 3 minutes after ye…why? Everythin' okay?"

"Yeah! I was just curious…I'll wake him up for you okay? He'll be out in 10."

Chibbs walked out and I was left with a snoring Juice. I went next to his ear and cooed his name softly. He smiled and turned into his other side.

"Juice, you gotta wake up! The boys need you for a ride", I told him and he groaned. "Don't wanna. Let's go back to sleep", he whined and held his arms out to hold me again.

"Baby. I told Chibbs I would get you up and I intend to fulfill my promise, now are you going to be compliant or are you going to make me drag you outside?"

"Drag me", he said after consideration and I laughed. He got up, grabbed his gun and knife and I handed him his cut.

"Thank you Juan", I said and he smiled widely.

"You gunna be okay while I'm out? I can stay-"

"Juice, I'm okay. Just go with the guys, okay? I love you baby." I grabbed him by the cut and pulled him closer. I pressed his lips against mine sweetly. He smirked at me and I winked at him. "Just don't be too long." I told him and he laughed.

"Knowing you're here waitin for me I'll be back in a heartbeat" he said and stood up. "I love you, be safe", he told me and walked out to meet the guys. I got dressed and decided to go to the police station to ask if there was any leads on Donna's case. I threw on a cardigan and a plain pair of jeans with my black combat boots. I grabbed my purse and my taser and walked over to the police station. On the way I saw a cop car parked outside of the local bar and I walked past it. Hale popped out of it and stopped me suddenly and I gave him a funny look.

"Caroline, can I talk to you? In private?" He asked and I furrowed my eyebrows.

"I guess.." I commented and we went into a coffee shop a few buildings down from the bar.

"How's the shoulder?" He asked and I tried to move it slightly but it was still tender.

"Still painful, but bearable. Now, what did you wanna talk about? Did you find any leads about Donna?"

His face stiffened and he shifted slightly in his chair; he was nervous. "Well, that's what I wanted to talk to you about. The day the we let Opie and the kids go, Stahl wired his truck and paid off on some of Opie's big debts. They really pinned him as the rat, and we both know what they do to rats. So, maybe they wanted to get Opie and accidentally got Donna instead? I mean it's just a theory but…"

He rambled on more but I blocked him out. It all made sense, there was a motive to want Opie to be killed. I thought about who would have done the deed and Tig was the first person to pop in my mind. He was the one that left the party the same time that we did, and he was acing weird before and after the murder. But would he just straight out say that he killed Donna like it was nothing?

"Caroline? Hello?", Hale tried to get my attention but I was too focused. I snapped out of it and stared at him.

"Don't tell anyone I told you this okay? I just feel bad about what happened, I feel like it's my fault for not warning you guys-"

"No. It's not your fault, it's that twig bitches fault." I growled walked off. Hale tried to go after me but he knew that I was a force to be reckoned with when I was angry. I walked back to the clubhouse and the guys got there at the same time. Juice smiled at me and I walked right past him in sheer anger. I stomped to the room and shut the door aggressively.

"The fuck you do?", Happy laughed and he sighed.

"Nothing. Hopefully." He got off his bike and prepared for hell. He crept in the door slowly and saw that I was holding my pillow angrily to my chest.

"Baby…", he said softly. "You okay?"

I pushed my face into my pillow and grunted. "I'm angry Juice! I don't wanna take it out in you, go away!"

He got up and shut the door locking it also. "Why're you angry?"

"I can't tell you. Just please", I pleaded and he sat down.

"Just tell me."

"No Juice! I can't! You'll get angry."

"Caroline, you're scarin' me. What is it?"

"NOTHING!" I shouted at him.

"Obviously it's something because you're all worked up", he shot back and I sighed.

"I'm not telling you for your own good Juice. Don't you trust me?"

"Of course I trust you, but you should trust me enough to tell me what's eatin' at ya."

I thought about it for a moment and took a deep breath.

"Chibbs said that…Tig left after me and Donna the night of the accident. And Hale told me today that there was a money transfer to Opie's account and that Stahl wired his car to make him look like a rat. I think that…Tig tried to kill Opie but killed Donna in the process", I said and Juice looked stoned faced. He got up and immediately went to the door but I stopped him.

"Juice! You can't say anything! I trusted you, don't make me regret it", I cried and he walked towards me again.

"If that's true, he almost killed you Care. And you expect me to just be okay with that? Act like it's nothing? I can't do that-"

"Do it for me Juice! Please! I'll handle it okay? We don't even know if it's true or not, it's just a theory. Please don't say anything okay? I promised Hale it wouldn't get out."

Juice sat on the bed and laid his upper half on the bed while his feet were planted on the floor. I did the same but I turned my body towards Juice and kissed his temples.

"I'll do it, for you", he whispered and I locked my fingers with his.

"Thank you Juice. Now I have to get ready for Bobby's party if you don't mind.", he laughed and turned his face towards mine. I scrunched my nose and he placed a kiss on it. He walked out and I took a deep breath, I couldn't believe I actually told him. I put on the dress that I bought with Donna and did my makeup. I curled my hair quickly and was done within 2 hours. I put on black heels and walked out and Juice immediately loathed the dress.

"Too flashy, change", he demanded and I puckered my lip.

"You don't like it? I bought it for you!", I hollered and he blushed slightly. He went to the garage and grabbed a leather jacket of his and handed it to me. I put it on and he couldn't stop staring at the dress.

"I love it, and so will every other guy in the damn place", he grumbled and I giggled.

"But you're the only one that matters to me baby", I winked at him and he sighed.

"Lets hope that's true, hopefully Skeeter won't come and take you away from me", he groaned and I busted out laughing.

"You don't gotta worry about him babe! I'm your girl remember?"

"Yeah. Yeah you are", he smiled at me and put his hand around my waist.

People started pouring in and there were a lot of faces I didn't recognize. I got sort of nervous and tried to stick by Juice as much as possible but it seemed like everyone was hovering over him and the guys. There was a lot of girls dressed up in revealing clothing and what seemed to be just a bra and panties. I walked outside and Happy walked up to me.

"Sup Killah?" He asked jokingly and I gave him a huge hug.

"Hey Hap! How are you? I haven't seen you in a while!" I exclaimed and he laughed.

"I'm good, just nomad right now, my moms pretty sick and I wanna be closer to her", he explained to me and I apologized to him.

"So…you and Juice huh? You serious about it?" He asked and I blushed.

"Yeah, I am. We've been dating for about a month and a half now but it feels like forever now…", I said and drifted off.

"You tell me if he treats ya bad, I've been itching for another tattoo." He joked and I punched him jokingly. My and Happy were actually very close, he was the one that taught me how to fight and how to shoot a gun properly. He always told me stories of his smiley faces tattoos and I was always so intrigued. I looked over to Juice and saw him smiling brightly while talking to his brothers from different charters.

"I just…I don't think I deserve him sometimes you know? He's so loving, understanding, patient, caring…" I drifted off and just gazed at him from afar. Happy laughed to himself and shook his head. "I think it's the other way around Munch, he don't deserve you. Not yet anyways." He said and I shot him a look. He raised his hands in defeat and I crossed my arms. A car drove in the lot and the guys came out to see who it was. Two middle aged men walked out and others came behind them to serve as body guards.

"One of them is Darby's guys", Happy grunted and pushed my behind him slightly. "Stay quiet got it? This guy's trouble."

Clay and the guy who said his name was Ethan Zobelle and AJ Weston was the other guy standing next to him. I knew that one of them was an Aryan because of his swastika on his chest just like Darby. I saw Tig pull out his gun and Zobelle raised his voice.

"Are you gunna shoot me Mr. Trager? In front of all these witnesses?"

I grabbed Happy's gun from his hip and stepped up to the both of them.

"You and your white supremacist dickheads should get the fuck off the property before I shoot you all. And I don't hesitate to shoot, I don't care who's watching." I growled and he placed a box on the floor. They all got in their car and drove off. I walked back to Happy who was just standing there smiling at me.

"Atta' kid." He praised me and I laughed. Me and Happy talked for a while and another car came by but this time it was Stahl and she was dropping off Bobby. Everyone cheered that Bobby was home and I didn't take my eyes off of Stahl. She finally locked eyes with me and we stared each other down for a brief moment. I flipped her off and she got in her car and drove away.

"You're just a little ball of anger aren't cha?" Bobby said and I hugged him. "Welcome home Bobby!" I exclaimed. Bobby wasted no time and started being all over the girls by the pool table. I sat by the bar and Half Sac sat next to me and poured himself a drink. We talked for about an hour, just rambling on about random topics. After a while Juice came up to me and I smiled at him.

"So I was thinkin… it's gunna be packed here tonight, so why don't we crash at my place? I don't live far and I'll being you back in the morning if you want", he asked me and I blushed slightly.

"O-okay. Yeah let me go get some stuff I need and we can head out", I said and went to the room. I walked in and saw that two people were occupying the room already and I covered my eyes and screamed. I grabbed my things quickly and scurried out as fast as I could. I wish I could erase that from my mind but sadly I was traumatized already. I said goodbye to everyone and walked out to the lot and saw that Juice was warming up his bike.

"You ready?", he asked me and I got on his bike. I held him closely and I couldn't help but feel extremely anxious.

To me, going to a guy's house was a big deal. Me and Juice were finally going to be alone without anyone to interrupt us. We got to his apartment and I walked in expecting the typical guy house, messy, but his house was spotless.

"You could put your bags here", he said in another room and I went to where he was. Before I noticed it I was in his room and I really felt nervous then. I placed my bags on the floor and went into the bathroom. When I came back Juice had his shirt off and I just stared at him. What the hell was I waiting for? Did he want me to make the first move? He looked at me and laughed "you good?"

I stomped towards him and pressed my lips onto his roughy and suddenly our cute sleep over turned into a whole make-out session. He slipped his tongue into my mouth and I breathed heavily. I was getting so wrapped up in him and I didn't want it to stop. I started to unzip my dress but he stopped me.

"Babe, I wanna do this, I do trust me. But I think we should wait, take things slow? I don't want to rush anything", he said and I slipped my shoulder out of my dress and he gulped.

"You don't want me baby?" I asked him seductively and he sighed.

"Fuck it", he said and peeled the dress off. I giggled and we proceeded.

That night was a night that I would never forget, I was going through a wave of emotions and in the end I got to be with Juice. I have had random hook-ups once or twice but I never experienced anything like I did that night. After Juice just held me in his strong arms and we cuddled until we fell asleep. I was peacefully asleep until I heard a phone ringing and I groaned. I looked at the light and saw that it was my phone ringing, I reached over and grabbed my phone and didn't recognize the number so I just let it go to voicemail. I put it down and it alerted me that someone left a voicemail in my inbox and I just stared at it funny. I grabbed it again and listened it the voicemail.

"Hey Care…it's Jake. I heard you moved to Charming so I came to see you. I'm in town, so we can meet up. I just…wanna talk about us. I know we ended badly but I love you. I love you babe. Call me back", it said and I dropped the phone. I stiffened and my stomach turned, I left Arizona to get away from him and he followed me back here.

"Baby? What's the matter", Juice asked half awake and my palms started sweating.

"My ex is in town. He wants to see me", I choked out.

I knew that he would try to go after Juice if he knew that I was with him now. My ex was bat-shit crazy, and the worst part was, he was a Mayan.