Chapter 8:
The cell Zarabeth had woken up in was different than the one she remembered. She still had a solid wall of wood behind and beside her, but the other two had a low wall of metal, iron bars making up its top half. The cell was smaller, but as far as Zara could tell, there were many more in that brig, hers being the furthest from the stairs leading up to the deck. There was always some light in her cell, the majority of it coming from the Etherium as its stars shone through the grate above her head.
From the color of the star-dust clouds high above her, Zarabeth could only guess that she had been unconscious for the rest of the previous day, the muted pink and red hues of the Etherium hailing the very early morning. The deck above her was silent, no hurried feet, no orders being relayed between spacers. It was hard to not feel utterly alone.
The heavy chains securing her wrists clanked and rattled as the girl pulled her knees closer to her chest, burying her face in the fabric of her leggings as she let her mind wander. How long had it been since that day back on Montressor? How long would it still be? There was no way of knowing if Jim even knew she was missing.
The events from the day before suddenly flashed in Zarabeth's mind, the memory of it making her hide deeper within herself.
Logan.
Traitor. Coward. Why did she even try? It was foolishness to think he could have changed. He was too afraid of Damian, too concerned with saving his own skin, too much of a coward to do anything if it wasn't for himself.
Releasing a quivering breath, the girl unconsciously brought her hand down to her neck, her fingers playing with the leather cord which almost always hung about it. Her hand trailed down to the heart-shaped pendant hanging from it, the one Jim had made for her, the necklace tenderly held between her fingers. It was a small comfort, the cold metal of the pendant beneath her touch. It somehow made her feel safer, letting her fingers play over the endless surfaces of the cogs and gears. It was as if a part of Jim was with her. He was always present in her heart and mind, but it was different to feel something he'd made, something which was a physical testament to his love for her.
The sound of someone coming down the wooden steps into the brig rang across the nearly empty room, its sudden presence making Zarabeth curl her arms even tighter about her legs. She didn't want to see anyone, not Damian, not Logan, not Camellia. She just wanted to be left alone.
The voice she expected to hear at any moment didn't make itself heard, the sounds of soft footsteps coming slowly toward her, almost with hesitation, the only things to break the silence. Maybe it was Damian thinking she was asleep or that maybe he could sneak up on her. Either way, Zarabeth was in no mood to care, simply remaining as she was with her legs up, head down.
There was the sound she was afraid of hearing, but fully expecting. It was the sound of the ring of keys being taken down from the wall just across from her cell, their sharp clatter only heightening in volume as one was placed in the metal lock keeping Zara's cell door in place.
"Zara?"
The girl tensed at her own name. That voice, it wasn't Damian's. It wasn't Logan's. Her heart immediately began pounding hard in her chest, her mind fighting against the impossibility of the memory of that voice.
The cell door was pushed open as quietly as it would be forced, the hinges only creaking a little as the voice spoke again. "Zarabeth?"
It was. It had to be. "Jim?" There was hardly time to look up before Zarabeth found herself surrounded in the boy's arms.
The sound of his voice as he spoke her name over and over, the touch of his hand warm against her as he pulled the girl to his chest, Zara could almost believe it.
"Is-Is this a dream? Oh, Jim, are you really here?"
His gentle hand stroking the unruly waves of her hair, Zarabeth could feel every fear and anxiety melt away at his voice low to her ear.
"Do I feel like a dream? Does this?"
The girl released a small breath as her chin was gently lifted, her lips immediately met with Jim's. He wasn't a dream. He was real.
Their tender kiss deepened, the boy's hands drawing Zara in closer as she wound her arms behind his back, ignoring the clatter of the heavy iron which rang with her every move.
After what felt like ages, the girl's attempt to pull away was suddenly stopped by Jim's hand as it held her in place, her heart pounding hard in her chest at the sudden movement.
At the first sign of the boy's hold lessening on her, Zarabeth released herself from his touch, hardly having time to think before her head was cradled once more to his chest. Trying to catch her breath, the girl laughed at her own bewildering thoughts, her words muffled by the fabric of Jim's shirt. "Miss me, did ya?"
"More than anything. Believe me, baby girl, you had me worried sick."
"B-Baby?"
Zarabeth's mind, fighting insecurities before, was now reeling in confusion, her stomach turning at their possible reality.
Pulling away from his arm, Zara had hardly sat upright before the boy's hands were cupping the sides of her face, eyes closed, his forehead resting against hers.
"Oh, Zara. I was so scared. I didn't know if I'd find you...alive."
The girl fought to keep her voice from trembling with her breath, her mind wild with terrible ideas and thoughts as she dared to utter a single phrase. "You're not Jim."
As if ignoring her, the boy tried to continue again. "We don't have much time. The crew are all still asleep, but we need to get as far away from here as-"
Her mind forcing her to action, Zarabeth hardly knew what she was doing until the sudden motion of her foot was shoved firmly into the boy's gut.
He stumbled backward on his knees, a low curse escaping his clenched teeth as he sat there for a moment in stunned confusion, an arm clutching at his stomach.
Finally looking up, the eyes which glared into Zara's were not blue. They were amethyst.
"You're not Jim."
The boy's anger seemed to instantly vanish, a hand stretched out toward the trembling girl a few feet away from him. "Wh-What are you talking about? Zara, it's me."
"The next time you try to fool me, Damian, don't kiss me, don't call me 'baby'. I've known Jim's kiss for five years, and that wasn't it. Jim's never called me 'baby' or 'baby girl'. He knows I can't stand it because of you. Now, if that was your punishment, then consider it done. I've had enough of you, you coward. Get out."
Zarabeth's words were the only things to keep her from the tears threatening to fall from her eyes. He'd toyed with her mind and her emotions. He'd brought Jim back in a dream form only to tease her mind with the mirage before mercilessly ripping him from her.
The look in those amethyst eyes softened even more than before, the boy still in Jim's form slowly crawling forward, retrieving the ring of keys from the floor beside him as he spoke. "Zara, I don't know what's going on, but something's not right with you. Now, I'm gonna get you outta those chains, ok? We're running short on time, but you gotta trust me."
"You're not Jim!"
"Stop saying that."
"Get away from me!" For all Zarabeth's resistance, she couldn't move far enough away, the chains binding her always keeping her within the boy's reach as he fought to get ahold of her wrists.
The boy's face wore a look of pure helplessness and sad confusion, the keys in his hand clinking sharply together with every attempt he made to free the girl beneath him. "Zara, please. This isn't you. It's all that venom talking. Remember at school when I had it? You're not thinking straight. Zara, it's me!"
A string of memories flashed in the girl's mind. Jim yelling at her in the middle of an empty hallway, sure that it wasn't Zarabeth standing before him, Jim lying lifelessly in a hospital bed, the effects of so much vipermese venom in his blood nearly killing him, it'd all happened that first year at school.
Was she doing the same thing? Was it happening to her? Maybe it really was Jim sitting in front of her.
No. Jim didn't ever call her "baby girl". He never kissed her like that. He would never glare at her the way that this boy just had, even if it was only instinct.
"No. You're not Jim."
The boy in Jim's form dropped his eyes for a moment, shaking his head in frustration before making a sudden move closer to the girl, trapping her in the corner of the cell. "I'm sorry, Zara. This is for your own good. As soon as we're outta here, I'll get you better."
There was nowhere else to move, no way to shrink back from his hand. Zarabeth squirmed and jerked her arms about, but it was no use. Her wrists were easily caught, the boy trying to find the right key to unlock the first set of chains, causing the girl's mind to reel in panic.
If this wasn't Jim, then she was far safer in chains than freed from them, the girl petrified at the thought of what new horror might await her if she let this boy release her from their iron grip.
She had no choice, she was short on options and opportunity. Zara had to act now.
Doing the only thing she could think of, Zarabeth fought one last time against the boy's grip before biting down hard on the skin of his unyielding hand, desperate to have him off of her.
With a cry which rang through the brig, the boy in Jim's form released his hold on Zara in a flourish of motion, scrambling to his feet with a trail of mumbled curses escaping his lips.
Her hands propped against the wall beside her, Zarabeth pulled herself up to stand facing the boy, her body trembling violently beneath her in a terrible mixture of anger and fear. "Leave me alone, Damian."
"I'm not Damian! Zarabeth, why won't you just listen to me?"
"Because you're lying!"
"No, I'm-"
"Stop it! Stop it!" The clatter of the heavy iron binding her wrists rang through the cell as the echo of her words slowly died, her hands thrown over her ears as she turned her back to the boy. She couldn't take it anymore. The lies, the deceit, she'd had enough.
"Zara?"
She stayed silent, unmoving. Resist.
"Zara?"
His voice, Jim's voice, drew closer with each cautious footstep she could make out behind her.
"Please let me help you. I can."
It was almost worse to not look at him, his voice that of the only person in the world she wanted to see. It was easier for her mind to believe that it really was Jim standing behind her and not an imposter, a phantom, or a poor reflection if she couldn't see those amethyst eyes.
Zarabeth's voice shook terribly, even in its low tone, her hands slowly lowered from her head as she let the heavy chains bring them to rest idly at her sides. "Leave me alone."
"Zara, you don't understand-"
Being turned to face him, Zara couldn't let him finish, her hand thrown across the boy's face with as much force as she could muster, the chains catching him as much as her hand.
The boy's angry voice could only be understood for a moment before Zara's world suddenly stopped, the cell spinning violently beneath her as the force of his backhand threw her to the floor.
Pulsing. Burning. Zarabeth's vision flickered in and out of clarity with every futile attempt to rise to her knees, her cheek throbbing with the hand she could almost still feel.
She'd seen Jim angry before, but the tone in the voice of the boy who pretended to be him was beyond anything she'd ever heard. It frightened her, Zara's mind fighting to remind her that it wasn't really Jim.
"Filthy little slave. Who do you think you are?!"
The effort to get up from her hands and knees was shattered with a swift kick to her gut, the air robbed from her lungs in a sudden cry of pain which made no sound as it dropped from her lips. Gasping for breath, the pain which wracked Zarabeth's sides brought tears to her eyes yet also kept them from falling, her arms wrapped helplessly about her as she waited for the sensations to abate.
Daring to open her eyes, the girl's gaze was instantly met with the dark leather of his boots, the sight instinctively causing her to shrink back as she drew in a painful breath. The touch of his fingers, almost too gentle as they ran through her hair, frightened Zara just as much as the prospect of being hit or kicked again, her already aching body trembling beneath his hand as he spoke in a calm and quiet tone.
"Such a fuss you make, you know that? Don't know what I was thinking, believing I wanted to marry you."
The feeling of the boy's fingers suddenly latching about a handful of her hair, Zara could only gasp at her own fear, the pain in doing so making the sound come out more as a small whimper. Completely at his mercy, Zarabeth could only do as she was urged as she was pulled upright to her knees, the girl's trembling only worsening at the almost evil look in the amethyst eyes glaring mockingly down at her.
"Such a waste of time, marriage. Dad figured it out, I guess I have too."
The words she desperately wanted to scream left her lips as hardly a whisper, no matter the effort she tried to put forth. "He wasn't your father."
"It's 'cause you're all the same. Weak. Pathetic. Helpless. Can't do a thing for yourselves. We take pity on you and justify it by calling it 'love'. We spend the rest of our lives chained to you, and for what? Ungrateful little wretch."
"Stop it."
Jim's voice, his face, but it wasn't him. No matter how hard Zara tried to tell herself that, the endless ringing of his words in her ears was chipping away at her sanity, the tears she could hold back before now falling unhindered down her cheeks as she tried to stop him from continuing.
The boy's eyes momentarily left hers, his amethyst gaze averted to the leather cord of the necklace still hanging from Zarabeth's neck. His fingers slowly trailed down to the small pendant, mindlessly toying with it as he spoke. "Dad knew what he was doing, leaving like that. Mom should've known he wouldn't stay forever. She wasn't enough to make him. You can just watch me do the same, if not today, then someday. It's just bound to happen."
Zara could feel her control slipping into oblivion, the boy's hand in her hair the only thing keeping her upright as she desperately tried without success to look away from those unwavering amethyst eyes.
"Know why?"
With one swift tug, the necklace which hardly ever left her was now torn from her throat, the thin cord instantly giving way to the force as it now lay idly in the boy's grasp.
Zarabeth had no time to cry out before she found herself thrown back to the floor, the boy's hand suddenly released from her. Trying to see through the tears blurring her vision, the girl looked up just as he began to leave the cell, stopping within reach of Zara as he dropped the necklace to the floor.
"You're just not worth it."
The girl's cry to stop him was too late as she could only watch the boy's boot come down on the pendant with a heavy 'thud', the sound of something breaking beneath its weight shattering her heart with it.
"No..."
The grinding of metal and the slamming of the cell door brought Zarabeth back into reality, her body screaming at her to stop moving as she crawled toward the small pile of twisted and broken cogs and gears near the door. Gathering the pieces up in her trembling hands, the girl let out a defeated sob as she hung her head low to the floor. Clutching the small handful to her chest, Zara cried harder than she could ever remember crying before.
She was broken.
Her mind was torn to pieces, her memory still ringing with every hateful word uttered in Jim's voice. Her body ached with the endless sobs which racked it, the pain in her sides and wrists tolerable compared to the pain in her heart.
She fought to remind herself who was really behind it all, but the memory of Jim's face and voice were too overwhelming to subdue, their presence frightening her far more than she ever thought possible.
"That wasn't Jim. It wasn't. It wasn't him."
Her words, quiet though they were, broke through the silence of the brig as they pushed their way past her own sobbing.
She didn't care. She didn't care anymore if anyone heard her or came. She just wanted Jim.
"Jim? Jim, where are you? Please...Please. I need you. I need...Please just come back to me."
