The day flew by, to my surprise. But no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get her out of my head. Everything reminded me of her. And she probably hated me now. I tossed my backpack in the front seat of my truck and looked for her car… but her parking spot was empty. I gave up after a few minutes and brought my car to life, cranking the music. I sang the lyrics loudly.
Tell me what it takes to let you go
Tell me how the pain's supposed to go
Tell me how it is that you can sleep in the night
Without thinking you lost everything
That was good in your life to the toss of the dice?
Tell me what it takes to let you go
It was oddly accurate.
The rest of my manliness vanished when I actually starting crying. I wanted to laugh at myself! Emmett Cullen. Crying! Can you picture it? I never could before…
Of course, the next song was the first song I ever listened to when I met Rose. Sure, maybe it was weird for a guy to pick out a song for him and his girlfriend, but probably weirder because of the fact that we were only friends.
You know
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore
And once more I was crushed by strong lyrics:
Don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
Cause I'd miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I'd still miss you babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
I clicked the stereo off and sat in silence as I pulled into my driveway. I rested my head on the wheel and closed my eyes…
-
"Emmett! Emmett!"
I inhaled deeply and opened my eyes. "Alice?" I mumbled. "W-what time is it?" I stretched stiffly.
"Almost five."
"Oh." I clicked the belt buckle and it snapped back. "You've got like eight missed calls on your cell phone…" She held it out.
"Why did you have my phone?" I swung my legs toward the door and jumped out of the truck.
"Mom needed Rosalie's number."
"W-why?"
"She invited her for dinner."
My eyes widened. "Why?!"
Alice stepped back. "What's wrong? I thought you liked her."
"Ugh!" I slammed the door and ran into the house, shutting my bedroom door and burying my head under my pillow.
The lyrics echoed in my head, "Tell me what it takes to let you go…"
That was my problem. I couldn't let go. I didn't know what it was… just like Rosalie couldn't let go of Edward… I shook off the thought.
I loved her. I hated her. I was mad at her. I was sympathetic for her. And I knew I couldn't hold a grudge against her. In a few minutes, she would walk through my front door and expect everything to be all right. I was adding to her stress and responsibility. But I just could not let go…
"Emmett, you know you want to talk to me!" Alice sing-songed in the hallway. "Please? I want to help."
"Go away."
"Rosalie is going to be here soon, you know. Maybe you want to wear something a little nicer? Hmmm…? I'm thinking violet. It will match her eyes!"
"Go away, Alice!" I repeated.
"Emmett! Please let me in! You tell me everything!"
"Tell mom I'm not eating!"
"Okay, now you're just being mean! Tell me what happened!"
"Alice!" I growled. After that, I didn't hear anything else.
I just laid there in thought and frustration until I dozed off for a while.
Mom knocked loudly on my door. "Emmett! Please come out and have dinner with us?"
"I'm not hungry!" I mumbled.
She sighed. "Alright… but you're being very rude, young man."
Like I cared anymore. I heard Alice approach and whisper something to mom. The door creaked open and Alice closed it behind her.
She crawled on the bed beside me and tried tugging the pillow off my head but I held it tight against the back of my head, my face buried in the sheets.
"Emmett," She whispered, running her fingers through my hair. But this wasn't Alice… "Aren't you going to have dinner with us? Your mom made your favorite."
"Go away, Rosalie. I don't deserve your kindness."
Her hand froze in my hair and she brought her lips to my ear. "Emmett," She whispered. "Please don't be mad at me…"
I threw the pillow onto the floor and sat up, looking at her. She was stunning. Her hair was curled and pulled back, except a few ringlets framing her perfect pale face. Her eyes were sparkling, the same indigo I dreamed of. And she was in a short purple dress that hugged her figure. "Rosalie Lillian Hale, you… you think I'm mad at you?" She nodded. I sighed. "I give up."
"What did I do?" Her voice flooded with worry.
I felt like screaming. My hands tightened into fists and I gritted my teeth momentarily. I exhaled sharply and lifted my hand to hold her chin, my index finger and thumb on either side of her jaw. "Rosalie… I need to tell you something and… I don't know if it can wait any longer." My conscience evaporated.
"I'm so stupid…" She muttered, looking down, playing with the string on her dress. "All this time… Em… I'm so stupid."
Why do you have to make this so freakin hard?!
"I… have to tell you something, too."
I raised an eyebrow. "Edward took you back?"
She shook her head. "No. Not exactly." She said quietly.
Alice knocked at the door. "Dinner is getting cold."
I let go of Rose and ran my fingers through my hair. "Let's go." I sighed, thinking I should have listened to Alice. My clothes were wrinkled and too casual compared to Rosalie's outfit. "Why don't you two go ahead? I think I'm going to change."
Alice nodded and held her arm out to Rosalie. She linked arms with Alice and disappeared into the hallway, closing the door behind them.
I thumbed through everything hanging in my closet but I couldn't seem to find anything purple to match her dress. I pulled my T-shirt over my head and slid my arms through a white button-down dress shirt, stealing a purple tie from my dad's closet. After finding a pair of slacks and black shoes, I looked in the mirror hanging over my dresser.
I wasn't good enough for her.
The smell of steak and potatoes floated toward me. I smiled and quickly made my way to the dining room. "Smells good, mom." I kissed her cheek and sat down beside Rosalie.
"Thanks, sweetie. Well, dig in!"
Dad was still down working at the hospital. I wondered why everyone was so dressed up. Mom was wearing a green beaded halter dress and Alice had overdone it, wearing her strapless red gown.
"Wow, Mrs. Cullen! This is amazing!" Rosalie complimented after a few bites.
"Thank you, dear. I'm glad we could have you over."
"Me too." She smiled. "So, what do we have planned after dinner?"
"You'll see." Alice chimed, winking at me.
Uh-oh.
"So how was school?" Mom asked.
Everyone stayed quiet. It was apparent no one had a very good day. Two of us in particular…
"Oh, alright then." She laughed lightly. "Well, on Saturday your father will be home and I thought we could all do something. Rosalie, we'd be happy to have you."
"Oh, I'd love to. But I think I have to do some moving this weekend. I'm sorry."
"Don't apologize." Mom smiled. "Let us know if things work out, then."
"Sure."
Alice and I did the dishes while Rosalie talked to mom about moving.
"You're going to tell her tonight, aren't you?" Alice whispered in the kitchen.
I shrugged. "I was going to… but maybe it was a good thing you cut me off. I don't know what I'm going to do."
"I think you should."
"She still likes Edward. Why would she like me?"
"Emmett, she doesn't like Edward. She just wants his love."
"Well she's never going to get it!"
"Shh! She'll hear you."
"I don't care." I pouted, putting plates in the dishwasher while Alice scrubbed the pan in the sink.
Suddenly I heard the words, "Don't tell Emmett" from the dining room. Alice looked over at me.
"Did you hear what she said before that…?" I asked, sincerely curious.
"No… But, who knows? Maybe it's something great!"
Yeah. And maybe it's something absolutely horrible.
"Don't worry about it. She has to tell you sometime."
"But what if that time is too late?"
"What do you mean?"
This was driving me crazy! No one understood what I was going through! No one. Everything was rushing at me at once. I was standing on thin ice and it was slowly but surely cracking. I felt like I was complaining every second of the day when I wasn't even doing anything about the problem. Maybe Mrs. Clemens was right. Was the problem with me?
I wished there was a word for every emotion at once. Whatever that was, it didn't touch what I was feeling. I was angry but happy, depressed but joyful, scared but hopeful, confused but understanding, and completely and utterly crazy in love with someone I didn't know I could ever have.
I know this whole story is, like, all complaints. But I just really want it to hit my [AMAZING] readers how horrible Emmett's feeling. I can't explain it as best as I want to, but I'm attempting a lot of stuff I've never done so0o0o...
But don't worry. It will end soon enough (: Or get worse... you never know :o
Thanks for the support so far! (:
It won't let me post the links here, but if you go to my page, there are links of how I picture the girls' dresses. (:
(I know, I know. It's seriously dragging. But I promise I promise I promise! That next chapter will be great (: )
Pwetty Pwease! Keep reviewing! We're almost to a hundred! (:
