The Expansion Paradigm
Chapter 08, The Mitochondrial Examination
Dr. Heller, professor of chemistry at MIT, and Ms. Needham, chief administrator for Boston General Hospital, walked into the school cafeteria.
"Welcome to the Excelsior Academy's annual science fair," Principal Herndon said. "The students are excited to have such prestigious judges for their projects. If you'll follow me, I'll take you to the displays."
Ms. Hahn approached her student, who was explaining his model of the DNA molecule to his physical education teacher and her husband.
"Mitchell," Ms. Hahn said, "Dr. Heller and Ms. Needham, the judges, are making their way around. That's them," pointing. "Are you ready?"
Mitchell took a deep breath and said, "I'm ready."
Dr. Heller walked over to the display as Mitchell was describing the chart he had made describing recessive genetic transmission to several older students. He stood listening for a few moments.
"That is an impressive display," Dr. Heller said. "How did you build the model of the DNA molecule?"
"My dad took me to the craft store, and I was able to get a bunch of Styrofoam balls. I used pipe cleaners and Popsicle sticks to connect them. I didn't know you could buy Popsicle sticks. I saw a DNA model at Discovery Place, and my dad took pictures of it with his phone. I also downloaded a drawing of DNA off a website."
"Did you make this model yourself?" Ms. Needham asked. "This looks as if you might have had some help."
"No, I did it all myself. My mom or my dad watched me while I made holes in the balls with the hot ice pick because I was heating it with a candle, but I did it myself."
"Still," Ms. Needham said, "This project looks advanced for a second grade student."
"Young man, Michael is it?" the woman standing behind Mitchell said, "I see that your chart talks about mitochondria and genealogy. What are mitochondria, and why are they important in genealogy?"
Ms. Needham turned to look at the woman. Her eyes became wide, and she gasped.
Mitchell, without turning around, said, "It's Mitchell, not Michael. Mitochondrial DNA comes from your mother. It is outside the nucleus and provides a link all the way back on your maternal line to your oldest maternal ancestor who had that particular mitochondrial mutation that you carry. There are seven basic mitochondrial mutations, although geneticists have identified a number of subgroups. They. . . Aunt Penny!" Mitchell shrieked.
Mitchell turned and threw himself at Penny. "What are you doing here?"
"Hey, sweetie," Penny said, kneeling to wrap Mitchell in a big hug. She kissed him on the cheek and said, "Your Uncle Leonard and I wanted to come see your science fair project."
"Hey, buddy," Leonard said, taking his turn hugging Mitchell.
"Dr. Hofstadter, Mrs. Hofstadter," Dr. Heller said, "It's an honor to meet both of you. I have to watch your show every Wednesday because my granddaughter always calls to talk with me about it after the show. You know this fine young man?"
"Mitchell's mom is my big sister," Leonard said. "Did I hear that you had a question about whether he did this project himself?"
"Well, I did," Ms. Needham said, "That is, I did until I knew the family he comes from. If he's your nephew, I'm sure he is bright enough that he did all the research himself. I understand there's talk of the Nobel Prize for your work with the Cern Super Collider."
"Oh, I'm sure Mitchell wouldn't want you to give him a pass just because he's my nephew," Leonard said, winking at Mitchell. "If you're not sure, you need to be sure, and not just because he's my nephew. If I were you, I would make sure he knows about his project. Hey, Mitchell: I see a chart here about dominant and recessive genes. Could you explain it?"
Mitchell noted that there was a man wearing a National Geographic Channel vest with a TV camera pointed at him. He also took note of the tiny microphone Leonard had clipped to his shirt. He cleared his throat and said, "We get half of our genes from our father and half from our mother. For dominant genes, if you get a gene from even one of your parents, you will have the characteristic. For example, Uncle Leonard here tastes saccharin as being extremely bitter. That is a dominant genetic characteristic, so he got the gene from at least one of my grandparents. Aunt Penny here tastes saccharin as being sweet, so she didn't get the gene from either parent. When she and Uncle Leonard have children, the children only have to get the gene from one of them to taste saccharin as bitter. Aunt Penny has unattached earlobes, which most people have, which is a dominant genetic trait, and Uncle Leonard has attached earlobes because neither of his parents gave him the dominant unattached earlobe gene. If attached earlobes were a recessive trait, their children would have to get the recessive gene from both Aunt Penny and Uncle Leonard to have unattached earlobes."
"Mitchell," Ms. Needham said, "Since I'm African-American, I'm sure that you can tell that from my DNA. How would you do that?"
"I'm sorry to tell you, Ms. Needham," Mitchell said, "but there is no genetic marker for race. There was some speculation a few years ago that the P20 marker differentiates people of African descent from other groups, but that turned out to be hokum."
"That's enough for me," Ms. Needham said. "I'm convinced you did this project yourself."
"Ms. Needham, Dr. Heller," Ms. Hahn said, "I can vouch for Mitchell. He did most of the work in class when I would give the students time to work on their projects, and his parents assure me that he did the rest at home by himself. He found Rosalind Franklin's picture of the DNA molecule on the internet and printed it out on our classroom printer. He designed the graphics himself and even developed a PowerPoint presentation."
Mitchell turned and hugged Penny again. She squeezed him and said, "I love you, big guy. I was already proud of you, but I'm even more proud of you."
Mitchell turned to Leonard and mouthed, "Thank you!"
By now, many children and adults crowded around Penny and Leonard.
"Dr. And Mrs. Hofstadter," Dr. Hernden, Mitchell's principal, said, "Welcome to the Excelsior Academy. Everyone is excited that you're here." She turned to the people gathered around and said, "Dr. And Mrs. Hofstadter called me a few days ago and arranged to be here to cover the science fair for their show and just maybe have some of the boys and girls. That's why we sent home releases for the parents to sign that would permit your children to be on video and have these people with cameras walk around and take your pictures."
"We're taking a lot of footage," Leonard told the crowd. "What we don't have on the show, we're going to have a link to an edited copy of on our show's website after the episode airs. We'll let Principal Hernden know when the episode is going to air so she can tell all the teachers. In the mean time, that young lady over there [pointing] has Science and Technology Week T-shirts and ball caps for everyone who is participating in the science fair."
"Penny! Penny! Penny!" some of the older students were chanting. "It's Penny and the brain, Penny and the brain!" they sang.
Penny and Leonard walked around looking at the various displays and asking students questions on camera, followed by an entourage of onlookers. Each time, their assistant took down the children's names. They posed for pictures with students, parents, and teachers.
Penny walked over to Janice, who was holding Molly, who was wearing her toddler-size Science and Technology Week T-Shirt, and took her three-year-old niece.
"Goodness, gracious, you're heavy," Penny said. Molly held Penny around the neck with one arm and held a handful of her hair with the other hand.
"Janice, Molly, thank you again for meeting us at the airport," Penny said.
""You have no idea how hard it was keeping your visit a secret from Linda and Mitchell," Janice said.
"This is my Aunt Penny," Molly told another little girl who was watching. "She gave me this shirt."
Penny carried Molly around as she and Leonard asked students about their projects. Mitchell joined them.
"This one is neat," Mitchell said, pointing to one project in which Gerald had made a rocket ship from a water bottle full of vinegar into which he released baking soda. It shot across the floor.
"Aunt Penny! Uncle Leonard!" Linda said, running across the cafeteria to hug Penny with her teacher following behind her.
"Hey, sweetie," Penny said, stooping down to hug Linda. "Hi. I'm Penny, Linda's aunt," she said, reaching up to shake hands with the teacher.
"Hey, horse girl," Leonard said, caressing Linda's face. "Midnight says hi."
"Aunt Penny: Your tummy's getting big," Linda said, patting Penny's stomach. She turned to a boy who was standing next to them, pointed to Penny's baby bump, and said, "There's a baby in there."
"Duh," the boy said.
Leonard turned to Penny and said, "Oops. I guess the cat's out of the bag."
"Aunt Penny's going to have a little girl," Molly said.
"We don't know that for sure," Janice said.
"I wished for a girl. It's going to be a girl," Molly said.
"Well, Penny," Janice laughed. "I guess you are going to have to have a girl."
"I do my best," Penny said, kissing Molly on the cheek.
#
"Congratulations again to our man of the hour," Michael said as Mitchell sat with his first place trophy at the Pizza Castle. "Mitchell, I always knew you had it in you. Now you get to go to the state competition."
"Mitchell, did you know that your Uncle Michael won his first science fair?" Al said as he bounced Randi. Randi was chewing on her dad's thumb.
"Mitchell, you looked so handsome in the pictures I saw," Rachel said.
"I don't like wearing ties, Grandmama Rachel," Mitchell said.
Linda and Molly sat with Penny looking at pictures on her iPad. "Show us Midnight again," Linda said.
"Sure, sweetie, but these are the same pictures I already sent you," Penny said.
"But we haven't seen them with you," Linda said. "He's so pretty."
"So pretty," Molly said.
"What kind of horsie is Midnight?" Linda asked. "I've been reading about horsies."
"He's an Arabian," Penny said. "You see how his tail curves up before it goes down? He would have been very expensive if I had to buy him, but the person who owned my Daddy's new ranch gave him to me."
"Why?" Linda asked.
"He was so mean, no one could do anything with him," Penny said. "Somehow, he likes me, and he's always a sweet boy with me."
"He hates my tofu-eating guts," Leonard said. "He tolerates me when Penny's around, as long as I don't touch him. We have several college students who come help out in the stables, and only one of them, Karen, is a girl, and she is blonde like your aunt Penny. He tolerates her, but he doesn't the boys."
"Aunt Penny," Linda asked, "Did that grasshopper man you tied up come with you?"
"Sheldon? No, he's back home in Pasadena," Penny said.
"Penny, Leonard, it's 6:20 p.m.," Renee said. "Congratulations on being married exactly one year."
"Wow," Leonard said, as he and Penny kissed. "It doesn't seem as if we were married one year ago today." He smiled as he looked at Penny. "Over six years after I met you, you're still the most beautiful human being I've ever known."
"Aunt Penny, why are you wearing the wig and those glasses?" Linda asked.
"When I go out in public, I have to wear a disguise so people don't bother us so much," Penny said. "I used to wear bright red lipstick with the disguise, but, since my ads for Back Door Cosmetics has me with bright red lipstick, I didn't think that would be much of a disguise now."
"Penny? Dr. Hofstadter?" the young mother with the two children peeping out from behind her, said. "I'm sorry to bother you. This is Caleb and Emma. They're too bashful to approach you, but they're big fans. We watch your science show every Wednesday. They're a little young to watch Nerds, but they've seen clips. They were really excited when you were in the tunnel with the bats and walked behind the waterfall that was in Last of the Mohicans."
Penny hugged both children and talked with them. She showed them some pictures from upcoming episodes of Science and Technology Week on her iPad. With Molly sitting in her lap holding her iPad, she had Rachel take pictures of the two children and their mother with her and Leonard with their mom's phone. "This is Aunt Penny's horsie," Molly said, showing Caleb a picture of Midnight.
"Molly, you're getting good with the iPad," Penny said.
#
Penny snuggled close to Leonard under the blankets. "I love snuggling with you. You're so warm. When we were apart, just lying here holding each other was something I missed every night."
Leonard said, "You know what? I had a pillow I kept that you used. After we were apart, I cuddled it every night, and, sometimes, I dreamed it was you. And now we're married. I can't believe you and I have been married a year. It seems like just yesterday that we had our wedding. I love you with all my soul."
"Leonard, I can't believe I ever dreaded committing to you, much less getting married," Penny said. "It's wonderful. It feels so-I don't want this to come out wrong-It feels so comfortable, as if this is how it was always supposed to be, like putting on your favorite old football jersey and your fuzzy slippers. You never had second thoughts, did you?"
"Never. Penny, I knew the day I met you that you were the most amazing person I would ever meet. No, I've never had a second thought."
Stomp, stomp, stomp.
Linda slid into bed. "Aunt Penny, let's snuggle," she said.
"Well you'd better cover up. It's cold. Goodness! Your feet are like little icicles," Penny said.
Stomp, stomp, stomp.
Molly suddenly stopped, crept to the bottom of the bed, raised the sheet and the blankets, and started crawling up between Leonard and Penny.
"You know, Leonard, I think this house has bed rats," Penny said, making a show of swatting the blankets near the lump as if she was trying to hit it.
"No," Leonard said, "I think it's a lumpus."
"What's the difference?"
"A lumpus is bigger than a bed rat," Leonard said.
A muffled giggle came from under the blankets.
"See, there's the giveaway," Leonard said. "Bed rats don't giggle, but lumpuses do. I'm 1/16th Cherokee, so I know these things. I'll bet we have a Ring-Tailed North American Lumpus."
Leonard reached down and pulled Molly up between him and Penny. "Gotcha! Look what I caught," he said. "A varmint. Let's stomp it and throw it out the window."
Molly giggled and hugged Leonard around the neck. "Did I surprise you?"
"You sure did," Leonard said, squeezing her.
Molly snuggled in between Leonard and Penny.
"Aunt Penny," Linda said, "Has your doctor made a movie of your baby? Mommy has movies of Mitchell, Molly, and me when we were in her tummy. Molly sucked her thumb."
"Not yet," Penny said. "My doctor had a baby and hasn't come back to work yet, but someone at her practice will do that in about another six to eight weeks if she hasn't come back to work when it's time."
"Will you send me the movie of your little girl?"
"Sure, sweetie."
Penny kissed the top of Linda's head.
#
Jason walked into the bedroom carrying Amy's bag. "I'm thrilled you decided to take me up on my invitation to visit the farm. You ought to be comfortable here in Penny's room," he said. "Dad hasn't changed the room since Penny moved to Los Angeles. Gina had her own room, so the room has just sat here."
Amy looked around. "Just think," she said. "I'm staying in the room where my BFF grew up, sleeping in the same bed. It's like a shrine." She looked at the pictures of young people in sports uniforms and of a young Penny in cheerleading outfits leaping into the air. There was a poster of Fleetwood Mac next to a poster of Stevie Nicks and Junior Rodeo and 4-H trophies and a picture of Penny in a bridesmaid dress at a wedding.
"Penny is a bit young to be a Fleetwood Mac and Stevie Nicks fan, isn't she?" Amy asked.
"They were our mom's favorite," Jason said. "Penny grew up hearing them all the time. She loves James Taylor too. Our dad played a couple of dates with James Taylor."
"I'm going to enjoy staying in this room," Amy said.
"I still wish you would stay in my room."
"Jason, I think that would be an invitation to something I'm not prepared to do," Amy said. "This is amazing. I am breathing the same air my best friend breathed."
Amy opened one of the drawers and started putting the contents of her suitcase in it. "What is this?" she said, bringing a plastic bag with something that looked like potpourri out of the drawer."
"Wow!" Jason said. "I wondered what happened to that. I put it in here right after Penny left so Dad wouldn't find it, and I forgot what I did with it." He smelled it. "Vintage."
Jason took the bag and left the room. He came back a few moments later and said, "Why don't I give you the grand tour?" He took Amy by the hand and gave her a quick tour of the farm.
"Which of the horses over there is Penny's horse Buttercup?" Amy asked.
"I'll show you."
Jason walked Amy down to the big water oak to where a large gray horse lay in the shade.
"Hi, Buttercup," he said.
Amy rubbed Buttercup's nose bridge the way she had seen Penny pet Midnight. "Hi, Buttercup. I'm Penny's BFF Amy."
Buttercup flicked her ears.
Later, in her sleep, Amy snuggled under the sheet cuddling one of Penny's pillows. She kissed the pillow.
Jason opened the door to Penny's room and walked next to the bed.
"Hey, Amy," Jason said, shaking her. "It's just before six. CBS This Morning will be on in five minutes. I made you breakfast. We can eat in the den while we're waiting for Leonard and Penny."
Amy came into the den wearing Penny's old University of Nebraska football jersey and a pair of her pajama bottoms and Penny's old Hello Kitty slippers. Jason had a large plate with scrambled eggs on it sitting on the coffee table. "Here's the bacon," he said, bringing a plate with bacon and toast on it. He had a pitcher of apple juice. "Coffee's ready. I didn't know how you like it, so I thought you could fix it the way you want it."
"I like my coffee the way I like my men," Amy said.
"Black?" Jason asked, strangling on his coffee.
"No, with three Splendas and milk or half-and-half."
"Huh? Uh, OK, then," Jason said, looking puzzled.
"It was sweet of you to get up and fix me breakfast," Amy said.
"Actually," Jason said, "I've been up for a while. I've already helped Jay hook up the cows to the milking machines, fed the chickens, and made sure the sheep have enough to eat. We start early on the farm."
#
A few minutes later, Norah O'Donnell teased the spot with Leonard and Penny as the camera showed them sitting on the couch where the interview would take place. Penny was wearing a baggy jacket that hid her baby bump. Leonard sat with his arm around Penny, and Penny smiled and waved at the camera. Norah said, "When we return from local news and weather, our favorite couple is here two days after their one-year wedding anniversary with a huge announcement."
When the show returned from local news and weather, Norah was sitting chatting with Leonard and Penny.
Norah said. "It was just over a year ago when we met Penny Hofstadter after she was the victim of a terrible home invasion. She took the country by storm and quickly became America's Sweetheart. Now she is a member of the CBS family, starring in the top new CBS comedy Nerds, on which Leonard is the technical adviser, and she and Leonard have their own weekly show, Science and Technology Week, on the National Geographic Channel. Penny has a recurring role on Castle as Richard Castle's mother Martha in her 20s. Her new movie, The Sixth Element, is scheduled to premiere Memorial Day weekend, and Serenity Two, the latest movie in the Firefly series, will premiere later this summer. She is currently in production for Rush Hour Four, coordinating shooting for that at the same time as for Nerds. Most recently, Penny was named to the role of Janet Van Dyne, the Winsome Wasp, in Iron Man Four and the Avengers II. Leonard, who was named the National Science Foundation Scientist of the Year for 2013, continues as a tenured professor of experimental physics at the California Institute of Technology, and there is talk of his team winning the Nobel Prize for their work with the Cern Super Collider. I hear, though, Penny, Leonard, that the two of you have a new production you wanted to announce here today."
Penny removed the jacket, revealing her baby bump. "Norah, Leonard and I couldn't think of anywhere we would rather come to announce that I am 12 weeks pregnant."
The crew and the other show members applauded, and pink and blue balloons fell from the ceiling.
Norah said, "Penny, I know that there have been rumors for a bit now that you were carrying a baby. Why did you wait so long to make an announcement?"
Penny said, "It's difficult coming to grips with the realization that people want to know about our lives. I mean, a little over a year ago, I was a waitress at the Cheesecake Factory going on every audition I could, and my claim to fame was a production of Ann Frank over a bowling alley, a one-night performance of Rent, and a national Preparation-H commercial. Leonard was a physics professor, and, now, people want to follow everything that's happening with our lives. Besides, where I'm from in Omaha, it's customary there not to make a big fuss until the end of the first trimester. That's where we are now."
"When's the due date?" Norah asked.
"September 1, give or take," Leonard said.
"I understand," Norah said, "that you found out Penny was pregnant on a special day."
"We found out on Christmas Day," Leonard said. "We were visiting my family in Boston, and Penny started having morning sickness. My sister and her husband are doctors, and they insisted she take a test, and it was positive."
"What did you do?" Norah asked.
"He fainted," Penny said.
"Really?"
"Really. How many times was it, Leonard?" Penny said.
"I'm not sure," Leonard said.
"I threw up in his car and sent him out in the middle of the night for watermelon, brownies, and onion rings," Penny said. "Leonard's the best."
"So, Penny," Norah said, "I understand that you are going to continue shooting Nerds. Your character Katie is a model who is on the verge of being a super model. How is the show going to handle your pregnancy?"
"Right now, I'm not showing that much," Penny said. "With the right wardrobe and the right camera angles, you can't tell. We only have four more weeks of shooting for this season when we return, and we just learned that we have been renewed for three more seasons. By the time we resume shooting in August, they're going to use creative staging, and they're thinking about having Katie Skype while I'm recovering from giving birth because Katie may be on location. We'll probably show a couple of new episodes in September, then do a few reruns until I can return. We're going to shoot all 24 episodes, we just might have to get creative with our schedule. They're going to shoot as many of my spots as they can this summer as we bring back some of the cast, and they have some with Katie alone."
Norah said, "Before we go, I understand that you two are here in New York for a special reason."
"Leonard is chairperson for the Hofstadter Foundation, which supports a number of worthy causes. He has to come here several times a year to chair their meetings. He'll meet with them later this morning. He has family in the Boston area, so we came up two days early to see our nieces and nephew and Leonard's new baby sister, since Nerds is taking a one-week hiatus."
Norah thanked Penny and Leonard for coming. As the show went to commercial, she chatted with them and arranged to meet them for dinner at Mama Fabrizio's restaurant.
#
"Jason," Amy said, back in Omaha. "What's on the agenda?"
"We could go into my room and get to know each other a little better," Jason said.
"Jason, I haven't seen you in a month and a half. I'm not ready for that. Why don't we get reacquainted?"
Jason moved next to Amy, put his arm around her, and said, "You know, Amy, I could rock your world. I could show you a part of the human experience you never knew existed." He turned her face toward his and kissed her on the lips.
"Hoo," Amy said.
Just then, Amy's cell phone rang.
"Hi, Amy," Penny said. "Leonard and I are in the car on the way to breakfast before he has to attend the Hofstadter Foundation meeting. Did you make it to Omaha all right? Did you see us on CBS This Morning?"
Amy put the phone on speaker. "Yes to both," she said. "I'm here with Jason."
"Hi, sis," Jason said.
"What are the two of you doing?" Penny asked.
"We were osculating," Amy stammered.
"Osculating?!" Penny said.
"I wasn't osculating her," Jason said. "I was hoping it would lead to that, but I was just kissing her."
"Jason," Penny said, "Osculating is just kissing, you moron." She turned to Leonard and said, "Osculating is just kissing, right?"
"Right."
"Jason," Penny said, "Amy is my friend."
"I wasn't doing anything," Jason said.
"Jason," Penny said. "Amy is an intelligent, sensitive woman. She's not one of your little air-head bimbi. You will treat her with dignity and respect, or so help me, I'll come all the way to Omaha and explain things to you. Do you remember 'Happy Birthday?'"
"Not 'Happy Birthday,'" Jason said.
"Happy Birthday," Penny said.
"What's 'Happy Birthday'?" Amy asked.
Jason crossed his knees, grabbed his crotch with one hand and his throat with the other, and said, "I don't want to talk about it."
"Treat her right, Jason." Penny said.
"Yes, ma'am," Jason said.
"I met Buttercup," Amy said.
"How is my baby?" Penny asked.
"She's bigger than I pictured," Amy said. "She seemed sweet, not like Midnight."
"She is a sweetie pie," Penny said. "I need to come to Omaha and see her."
"What are your plans?" Amy asked.
"Leonard and I are going to try one more time to have lunch with his mom after he meets with the foundation," Penny said. "We're supposed to fly out tomorrow morning."
"I think I'm going to start drinking heavily now to prepare for lunch with my mother," Leonard said.
#
"That's where Penny, Gina, and I went to high school," Jason said as he and Amy drove down Sam Wilson Road.
"Jason," Amy said, "I enjoyed eating at the Beef Pit. I've never been to a restaurant where they have buckets of roasted peanuts at the table and you get to throw the shells on the floor."
"I worked there when I was in high school. To tell you a secret, people walking on the shells buffs the floor. At the end of every shift, they sweep up the shells and toss them. You don't have to use the buffer."
"Were you popular in high school?" Amy asked. "We must have had 30 people come up to you and speak."
"I was quarterback on the football team," Jason said.
"I'll bet you dated the head cheerleader," Amy said.
"No, Penny was our head cheerleader," Jason said.
"What about your senior year? Penny's a year older than you are, so you would have had a year after she graduated."
"My cousin Sherry was the head cheerleader my senior year."
Jason drove Amy back toward the farm.
Amy and Jason held hands as they walked from the driveway and stepped up onto the front porch. As they opened the door and started into the den, Jason turned Amy and kissed her. They stood in the doorway embracing.
"Let's go to your bedroom," Amy said.
"Really?"
"Really."
Amy took Jason's hand and led him across the den and down the hall to the master bedroom.
"This used to be my parents' room," Jason said. "It's mine now that I own the farm."
Jason turned the knob, and he and Amy walked into the room.
#
Next: The Wrath of Blonde.
#
Author's Note: I have to give a huge shout-out to the person who writes under the name 'pfps' for taking the time to give me some extremely valuable feedback about this story. I was deciding among several directions for one of the characters, and pfps' suggestions helped me confirm which way I wanted to go.
