A/N: Hey everybody. Sorry for the rather long wait, but 8th grade's been taking over my life. There is almost no time for me to go on the laptop and update my stories. Ah, but's that's part of growing up, huh.

Anyways, I've been in a pissy mood for the past few weeks and the things that happened in school today just made it worse. I'm trying to manage my temper but I always find myself taking it out on an inanimate object. Sometimes I would even cuss. Today, school started out so well until 6th period. Basically, my teacher has this system for the class where there are squads and squad leaders. At the moment, I'm a squad leader and none of my members are cooperating. They are all telling me to shut up, they aren't following instructions, and worse, their actions make me look like a bad leader.

~sigh~ You probably didn't need to know that but whatever.

Hope you enjoy this chapter.

Disclaimer - I don't own Naruto, Masashi Kishimoto does.


Sakura couldn't help but notice how much gloomier he has gotten since this morning.

His face seemed paler than usual, and his onyx and crimson scarred eye were full of…nothing. Whenever she would pass by him, sometimes brush up against him, an eerie aura would lurk around her and send chills running throughout her body. It was almost as if his heart was completely empty and barren.

Like before, she would have gone up to him and try to comfort him in any way possible, but today he was different. Instead of a humanly being, he was a cold ghost of the night. It scared her, almost frightened her to the point where she wanted to flee. She disliked the depressing coldness he was radiating, but what could she do? She can't just flip that frown upside down and make everything better again. He wasn't a toy.

Sighing, she pressed her hand against her forehead and allowed her eyelids to side closed. She was frustrated, really. First of all, she has her pains and injury to deal with. Secondly, she has to catch up with missed homework and class notes. And lastly, she has to put up with Kakashi for the rest of the week as his personal assistant.

The bell suddenly rang and she heard the relieved sighs of her classmates echo in the gym. Knowing that she has nothing more to do, she rose to her feet, slung her backpack over one shoulder and started off toward the exit. But before she could even leave, a hand gripped onto her arm and kept her in one place. Looks like she won't be going anywhere anytime soon.

"Sakura." His grip tightened, or at least she thought it did. "Can I talk to you for a second? You're not in trouble."

She blankly stared at him, then glanced at her departing friends. Knowing that it might be a while, she dropped her bag and reoccupied her chair. "Sure. What about?"

He sat in front of her and thought for a long time before asking, "Do you ever feel…depressed?"

"I felt it all the time…" She released a small breath and forced a smile. "…until you came around."

Kakashi didn't reply immediately. First he was still, almost as frozen as a statue. His eyes darkened and grew even gloomier, and she swore that she saw his lips twitch. Then the words came, "Do you really think I'm that much of a help?"

"Yes, actually…" She nervously fidgeted with her fingers, wondering if he was pleased with her comment. Probably not.

Her eyes rose to meet his charcoal-colored ones and she shuddered when he gave her that 'shut up or I'll kill you' look. Her gaze immediately fell back to her feet and she kept it there, afraid that he would give her yet another skeptical glare.

"I see." He paused momentarily before staring at the ceiling. He stared long and hard and finally when the time came, he stood up and said, "I have so many things I want to confess to you, Sakura. About my past. Right now you're probably wondering why in the hell would I want to talk to you so deeply about something, but I know that you are the only person who understands true pain."

The pink-haired student sank further back into her seat as she felt her heart plunge into the depths of darkness. She tried thinking back to those horrible and tragic moments. She did understand torturous pain, didn't she?

His shadow loomed over her and she glared at him. He was even closer than before. "Remember when you said that we would help each other?" he asked hoarsely.

She croaked, "Yes. I do."

"I kept my part of the deal." He slowly backed away from her and eventually turned away. "Now you must keep yours."

She nodded fearfully. She felt as if he was watching her shiver in fear. Perhaps he had eyes behind his head.

"You still remember where I live, am I correct? I recall you having to visit once before…"

"I remember, Kakashi."

"Great." He looked over his shoulder for a second before departing. "Meet me there before six, and bring your homework if you must. It might be a long…interesting conversation."

Her brain was telling her that she shouldn't go. But her heart was telling her that she should.

. . .

Sakura walked down the sidewalk, her handbag dangling down her side and a single subject notebook being squeezed in her hands. The sun was sluggishly setting over the horizon and every minute that passed, the light dimmed even further. The evening was peaceful and soothed her greatly. With the birds singing and the crickets chirping, she felt like she could fly up into the sky.

The sudden roar of a motorcycle's engine rang in her ears, directing her eyes toward the road beside her. She watched as an unknown man wearing a helmet rode along the walkway and parked. She grew uneasy as he stepped of his vehicle. She had a feeling he wanted to talk to her.

She was dead frozen as he made his way in front of her. But once he removed the helmet that hid his identity, she sighed in relief and was once again free of tension.

"Sakura?" Genma almost laughed as he stuffed his keys into his pocket. "It is you!"

"Um…hello Genma," she greeted bluntly, a fake chuckle following afterward.

The chestnut-haired teacher laughed halfheartedly and asked, "So do you live around here? Now that I think about it, I've never seen you walk down this path, Pinky." His eyes cringed, an outward sign of his grin, and scratched the back of his neck. "It's a little odd. It almost seems like you're walking to Kakashi's house."

Hanging her head slightly, she replied, "I am going to his house…"

His smile flattened and he eventually ended up frowning. She could tell that he had many questions in mind just from the look of his expression. His face was dead pale and his eyes were as dull as the shadows.

"So…what? You received detention that takes place at his house? Or were you dared to cover his home in toilet paper like the last pair of dumb ass teenagers did?" She couldn't tell if he was trying to joke around or not. He sounded too serious to be joking.

"I…" The girl paused momentarily to gather her thoughts. "We both promised each other something. He kept his end of the promise, so now I have to keep mine. A promise is a promise and breaking one is just unforgivable." She wouldn't say that they promised something to each other, but her explanation suited the situation well.

He stared at her for a long time without blinking. He was confused. She could tell. "A promise…heh…how ironic." He shoved his hands into his pockets and gazed at the clouds. "You know, he hasn't talked to me or any other of his buddies for a long time…Every once in a while, we would say hi or even exchange a few jokes but he never brought up a topic about his past," he explained with a mellow tone, "You're the first in three years that he emotionally talks to, Sakura."

She blinked a few times, shocked from the information he was giving her. "I…uh…" She couldn't find the right words.

"No need to say anything, kid." He patted her on the head softly and pulled his helmet over his head. With a muffled voice, he said, "If you're going to chat about his past, I suggest that you try to comfort him often during his little speech. And try to be as kind as possible." He hopped onto his motorcycle and started the engine. "A couple years back, I tried forcing him to move on and things got ugly. So please, please be gentle. I don't want to see you in the hospital tomorrow."

"I…eh…" She bit her lip, afraid of thinking about some possible negative outcomes of their conversation. "Genma, I-"

"Don't worry, Sakura!" he laughed. "I don't think there would be any problems while you guys talk. You're his favorite student and he really seems to like you a lot." He waved goodbye and took off, his dark brown hair blowing back in the wind.

A minute later, she was walking up Kakashi's front porch steps, her legs shaking violently in anxiety. She was nervous. The intimidating looks he gave her during PE nearly scared the wits out of her and she did not want to put up with that again! And just when she thought it couldn't get any worse, Genma told her about Kakashi's hidden, violent emotions.

No, she wasn't nervous anymore. She was scared.

Reluctantly, she knocked on the door and waited impatiently for him to answer.

Finally, the entrance swung open, revealing a tall and lean silver-haired man. He was in his home clothes. He was wearing a thin black shirt that clung around his sides, complimenting his hard-rock abs. His white basketball shorts fell just below his knees and she noticed that he was sagging a bit. He was barefoot and didn't look too clean. His hair was disheveled and hung in front of his forehead, and his skin looked ghostlier. But something about his odd appearance was extremely alluring.

"Hm…" He scratched his chin as his eyes roved all over her body, particular around her flushed cheeks. "I thought that you wouldn't really visit. You seemed afraid back in PE, even now. I wonder what convinced you to come," he drawled.

"Well, let's just say that something motivated me," she murmured silently.

He stepped to the side and gestured toward her. "Please, come in and make yourself comfortable. I'll prepare some refreshments for us and then we'll talk. Sounds good?"

She nodded slowly as she entered his house. She took one quick look of his living room while he slugged of into the kitchen. It was surprisingly tidy and clean but had a slight scent of smoke. She thought men like him would be total slops but then again, she did judge people a lot these days. He even had a small arrangement of books on his shelf, and they were educational.

Perhaps he had some porn stashed somewhere. Not every man is perfectly sophisticated.

"Hey," she heard him call from the kitchen, "why don't you settle down over here?" A loud clink and clang suddenly echoed in the living room. She guessed that he truly was fixing her up a drink.

"Alright," she responded, scurrying off in his direction.

Sakura poked her head through the open door and glanced to the left to find Kakashi holding two glasses, one filled with water and the other with tequila. He looked at her once more and smiled softly, his smile inviting her to sit down at the dining table. She accepted his invitation and seated herself calmly, settling her handbag on the floor below her.

He eventually sat beside her, a fair distance in between them, and handed her the water. He watched her as she sipped it delicately, the clear liquid lapping over her lip. It was few more seconds before he started gulping down his own refreshment, the strong bitter taste burning in his throat.

He knew that he shouldn't be drowning his sorrows out through alcohol in front of his own student, but he doubt that she gave a shit. She should be able to understand why. She understands him well enough to know why he would be so cranky.

He placed his glass on the tabletop then wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. He eyed her as she mimicked his actions, like a confused child who has yet to learn more. He stared at her, trying to figure out how broken she really was. He already knew that she had a lonely, miserable past which is suprisingly similar to his, but what else is there about her? What other things did she have in common with him? Had she lost so many loved ones that she ended up trying to take it all out on herself like how he had? Had she once wanted to get rid of her own life to escape her misery?

He felt his shame engulf his heart again, drowning it in the process.

"Kakashi…"

His mismatched eyes rose to meet her emerald ones. "I apologize for discomforting you."

Kakashi gazed at the ceiling, "It's extremely hard for me to talk openly to people because I never learned how to. I was always closed up in my own little shell, and I grew up with a huge barrier placed around me. What I find surprising, though, is that you were good enough to make that wall tumble." He took one look of her and smiled weakly, "I find it hard to believe that I've become so attached to a student. You know what…you aren't like a student to me at all, you're more of a friend."

She was listening tentatively and didn't bother to make a comment. He continued, "I guess I'm going to pour my heart out to you now. Well—I'll pour a quarter of my heart out since I haven't done this for a while."

"You're not going to have any problems with this? At all?" Sakura interrupted quietly.

"Perhaps a little." He shrugged with practiced nonchalance, "To start this off, I think your childhood is similar to mine in some ways. When I was very young, a few years after I was born, my mother died. I can't say that I remember why."

Sakura nodded in understanding. She felt the excruciating pain before when you lose somebody. A deadly disease swept over her village when she was a child and killed everyone. Luckily her parents were away at the time and weren't ill. Losing a parent is way worse than the scenario she experienced, so the pain he felt must have been terrible.

"Then around the age of seven, my father committed suicide because no one respected his values. Not even I respected him. He was a part of the police association but didn't follow the rules. He thought none of them were of importance and created his own. After his death, I was devastated and vowed to take on his challenges. Every day, even now, I visit the Memorial Gardens downtown and mourn over him and the many others I lost." He scratched the back of his head and sighed, "My two closest friends were included in the other group, Rin and Obito. When I was a senior in highschool, Obito committed suicide because he was bullied almost everyday. Rin died trying to stick up for him. The bullying was so bad that some people brought guns. One kid, Pein, equipped himself with a gun and shot. The bullet was meant for Obito but Rin sacrificed herself. Obito took his own life away the next day, thinking it was all his fault."

Kakashi was crying at this point, streams of tears flowing down his cheeks. He was shaking violently, his hands clenched and eyes squeezed shut.

Sakura didn't know what to do at first. She eventually remembered Genma's advice and reluctantly rubbed his shoulder in hope of comforting him.

"I wanted to take my own life away too. I was so frustrated and hopeless, but I knew that somewhere out there, Obito and Rin were pleading for me to not. I managed to keep my misery locked in a cage for four more years before joining an elite police force, ANBU. It still exists today, and I still am a part of their association. They can pull me out of my little hole whenever they need the help, but that hasn't happened for three years," he explained.

"ANBU?" she wondered aloud. "But that is so dangerous."

"I know." He frowned and shook his head, "I can show you proof."

He rolled up his sleeve, revealing a red tattoo. It was a little blurry toward the outside, but she can easily tell that the symbol symbolized his authority.

Kakashi let his sleeve fall back in place. "I thought joining ANBU would get rid of my problems, but it only made it worse. Almost every month, I saw an innocent person die right in front of me. Almost every week, I had to shoot down a wanted criminal, having fear of shooting him or her at the same time. And almost every year, I was wounded, nearly killed. I wished for my death, even now, because I'm not good enough to live in this world. I've been hiding my misery and pain for years and I managed to keep it a secret from every single friend of mine, but you. You just broke that damned wall I put up long ago. You broke that…damned wall."

"Kakashi." Her hand slipped on top of his and squeezed it reassuringly, "Don't think that you aren't good enough. Don't wish for your death. Everyone would miss you. Everyone would go nuts if you committed suicide. Do you not know how much you are loved?"

He shook his head in disagreement. "I am not loved, that is a lie."

"You are loved."

"Are not."

"Are too."

"Are not."

"Are too."

"Are not," he stated firmly, his expression quickly growing bold.

Suddenly, her fingers fit in between his, twining their hands close together. A small, sad smile spread across her face, "Are too."

He sat there, taken aback from her words and actions. She sounded so confident, so…caring.

"You are loved," she repeated silently, "You have many friends out there that care, Kakashi, including your students."

Kakashi didn't respond but found himself growing fond of her. He was beginning to see that dim light of hope once again, and it was all because of her.


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