Chapter Eight
~Alyss~
I was lying in bed with Jack, cuddling into his side. He lifted my face up to his and starts kissing me. Soon, it's was full-blown make-out session, his tongue playing with mine. I felt his hands start to roam my back and I was suddenly scared as his hands find their way under my shirt. But nothing happens. At least, he doesn't pull back and wonder why my back's all scarred up. No, instead he moved so he was on top of me and started to take off my shirt. I raise my arms to give him a little help. The moment my shirt's off, he started leaving a little trail of kisses from the corner of my mouth, down my throat, my collarbone, all the way down to my breast. His lips kissed the top of it where the bra didn't cover it while his fingers were undoing the clasps in the back. Once the clasp was undone, he slid the straps of my bra down and fastened his mouth onto my breast while his hand came up to cup and massage the other one. I bit my bottom lip to try and stifle the moans that kept coming out. My hands were roaming his back and found the hem of his shirt. I pulled his shirt and he gladly helped me.
But then the face that's looking down at me with hunger isn't Jack's. It's another boy's face. I suddenly feel that my hands are tied above my head. I'm trapped. The boy just smiles down at me as I struggle and starts trying to undo the button of my jeans…
I bolted upright in bed, checking everything. My hands weren't tied, my shirt was still on, and Jack was still there, albeit rudely awakened from me sitting up so fast. I'm okay. I'm safe. I'm okay. No one's gonna hurt me. I'm okay. It was just a dream. I'm okay.
"Alyss?" Jack muttered sleepily, sitting up with me. "What's wrong?"
I stared down at my hands, seeing blood I knew couldn't be there. Then my vision when blurry and I was having trouble breathing.
"Alyss? Alyss, sweetheart, what's wrong?" Jack put his hand under my chin to make me look at him. "Tell me what's wrong?"
"I-I-" I couldn't get the words out. I felt the tears fall down my face and realized I was crying. Not only that, I was hyperventilating.
"Alyss? Alyss! Calm down!" He cupped his hands around my face. "Shhh, you're okay. It was just a dream,"
"Just a dream. He can't hurt me. Just a dream. He can't hurt me," I chanted.
"Who can't hurt you? Rico?"
I shook my head and buried my face into his chest, sobbing. He wrapped his arms and rocked me gently, rubbing my back to try and soothe me. I cried for a good long while, until my tears finally dried up and the sobs stopped coming. I took a deep breath and looked up at Jack, who was looking at me with concern.
"Sorry about that," I whispered, taking deep breaths. "I just…"
"Had a bad dream?" he finished for me. I nodded. "Do you wanna tell me what happened?"
I gulped. As must as I wanted to confess my dream to Jack, I was too scared to talk about him.
"That bad?" I just nodded, not trusting my voice. "It had something to do with what happened before you came here, huh?" I nodded. Damn, he was good. "I used to have nightmares, too. Shit, I still do sometimes,"
"Why would you have nightmares?" I asked, confused. Jack have nightmares? Not possible. He looked a little uncomfortable at that. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pry,"
"It's okay," He reassured me, giving me a half smile. "I didn't exactly have a cozy life before Evelyn,"
"What foster kid does?" I mumbled. He laughed but there wasn't really any humour in it.
"Anyways, some things happened to me and it still scares me. But then I remember that here I'm okay. None those bastards can hurt me now. And no one can hurt you either,"
I nodded. "I know. It just…it still scares me,"
He tilted my face up to his and kissed me sweetly. "I swear, Alyss. Nothing is going to happen to you. I promise," He held my face to make me look at him.
I smiled and whispered "Thank you,"
He smiled and kissed me one more time. "Now, let's get some sleep okay?"
I nodded and lay back down. He lay down with me and wrapped his arms around me to hug me close. My arm and head lay on his chest and I fell back to sleep in no time.
I woke up to find Jack was already gone. I sighed and stretched. The motion made my sleeves pull back a little so my scars could peek out from under them. I glared at the incriminating marks and frowned. I so badly wanted to spill my guts to Jack but how would he take it? I know he said bad stuff happened to him but there was no way it could be as bad as me, right?
I got up and got dressed, making sure all my scars were covered. Then I turned to the new stereo Evelyn got me (well, it was new to me since she got it at a Goodwill. Thing worked great!) and popped in my mixed CD of We Are the Fallen. "I Will Stay" started to play and I couldn't help but start dancing to it. I held my arm up and slightly rotated my hips. Bellydancing was my forte and I loved it. Dancing made me feel alive and unwound me when things were stressed. As I danced, I sang along with the song. I still danced as the song changed to "The Only One," one of my all time favourites by them. Suddenly, I felt a pair of arms wrap around my waist. I looked to see Jack there. He started to dance with me, not provocatively like most guys would do. He held me and swayed in time with my gently rocking hips. I placed my hands on his and twined my fingers through his own. "Sleep Well, My Angel" started to play and I looked into his eyes. I sang to him, holding his gaze the entire time.
"So, sleep well, my angel. Sleep well, my angel…" I reached up and kissed him as the song ended. "I love you…" I whispered.
He kissed my forehead. "You are so precious to me. Never forget that,"
I blushed and smiled at that. No, there was no way I could forget.
=Jack=
Jack woke up early that morning again and kissed a sleeping Alyss before sneaking back into his room. He lay in bed waiting for Evelyn to shuffle out of her room to go down for breakfast before getting up and dressed. He went over to Alyss' room to see her door cracked open. He peeked to see her dancing and singing along to music that was playing on her stereo. He eased in and quietly closed the door, leaning against it so he could watch her dance. Her back was to him and it didn't seem like she was aware of his presence.
Her movements were so graceful and slow, he was captivated. And her voice…He wasn't kidding when he asked if she was an angel. There was no way a human could have a voice like that. And her dancing? Forget about it. No girl he'd ever danced with ever moved like that.
She raised her arms at one point and her shirt lifted up a little. His eyes bugged out at the sight of scars on the small of her back and it looked like there was more. Lots more. His face turned hard and livid. Who did that to her? What asshole could hurt such a beautiful, sweet, innocent girl like Alyss? The thought made him sick to his stomach.
The next song started to play and he couldn't help but walk up behind her and wrap his arms around her waist. She looked back in surprise but didn't stop singing or dancing. Instead, she put her hands on his and twined her fingers through his. He swayed in time with her hips and held her close. When a song with a gentle piano intro with some subtle violin started to play, she looked up and sang to him. He stared into her dark eyes the whole time, not breaking away for a second. When the song ended, she reached up and kissed him.
"I love you…" She whispered.
He kissed her forehead. "You are so precious to me. Never forget that," And he meant it, every fucking word. She blushed and smiled at that. They swayed a little longer to the music on her stereo. "Who this?" he asked after another song played.
"It's called We Are the Fallen. They're relatively new,"
"Ah, that explains why I haven't heard of them. The music sort of sounds like this one band. What's it called….?"
"Evanescence?"
"Yeah, them,"
She shrugged. "That's because two of the members are from Evanescence. I guess they got fired for some reason. Not too sure,"
"Oh," They continued to dancing like that for a while. Jack thought about the scars he'd seen and he had to fight to urge to ask about them. He wanted so badly to find out who did that to her and hunt the bastard down, but then he remembered how she acted last night from the dream. "He can't hurt me" she had said. Was she dating some guy that beat her? Or had one of the foster parents done it? The idea brought memories of Jack's own torture before Evelyn rescued him. The possibilities were endless and he had to know.
"Alyss…" he muttered.
"Hmm?" she hummed. Her eyes were closed and she was resting her head against his chest. "I…I noticed some scars on your back," She froze and her eyes snapped open. "I just wanted to know, what happened?" Her mouth was twitching like crazy and her hands squeezed hard on his. Shit, he shouldn't have said anything.
~Alyss~
Crap. Crapcrapcrapcrapcrapcrapcrap… CRAP! He saw! Oh crap, he saw! Damn scars! Stupid, stupid, stupid! I was careless. I should have been more careful. What'll I do? I can't lie, not to Jack. But he will want to see and if he does, he won't want me anymore. But I can't lie. I just can't do it.
"Well, ya see…how do I put this?" I let go of his hands and stepped away from his arms. I hugged my chest instead, trying to hold myself together. "You know how my parents died, right?" He nodded. "Well, when they tried to find relatives for me to live with, they came up blank. I had an aunt but she didn't want to take me in. At first…" He nodded and gestured for me to continue. "So, I went into foster care. Of course, being the little freak that I am, no one wanted me. Then when I was thirteen my aunt shows up wanting custody of me. Why? I have no clue. Probably got asked what happened to her niece and didn't want to look like a bad person. Selfish bitch. Anyways, so I go to live with her and her son, my cousin. Now, Marisa, that's her name, is a Christian woman. A very Christian woman. I, however," I reached up to my collar and pulled out the pentagram I still had on from a week ago, never taking it off except to shower. "Am not. She didn't like that. She tried to take me to church and change my ways. Didn't work. Hell, it actually made me more convinced that Christianity just wasn't for me. I tried to tell her that once and she, well," I fumbled for the right word. "Snapped," I put an arm across my chest to rest my hand on the opposite shoulder and the other hand went to my waist. "She…she dragged me into the basement and…ripped off my shirt and…and tied my hands so she could hang them on the light fixture on the ceiling and grabbed for a whip and…and…" My eyes grew blurry as big, fat tears rolled down my face. Jack came over and gently guided me so I sat on the bed. He sat next to me and wrapped his arms around me.
"It's okay," He whispered. "No one is ever gonna do that to you again. She'll never get the chance to do that again,"
I shook my head. "That wasn't the only time,"
"What?" His eyes grew wide and shocked.
I nodded. "She'd whip me for every little thing after that. Bad score on a test, saying the wrong thing or forgetting something. It didn't matter. I was an evil demon that had to be punished,"
"Why the fuck would she do that? You're her niece goddammit!" He looked livid.
I shrugged. "I don't know. I never understood it either. Lots of my friends were Christian and didn't give a crap about my Paganism. They say cross, I say pentagram. They say Christmas, I say Yule. They say church, I say temple. And no matter what, they didn't care. Hell, some even went to temple with me if they could, just to see what it was like. Yeah, I went to church in return but I always hated it. I felt like a poser and that I was disrespecting all these people who devoted their time to God while I didn't have faith in him like they did,"
"Is that why you get nervous when Evelyn says grace?"
"Noticed that, didn't ya?" He nodded. "Yeah, that's why,"
He was silent for a while. I expected any minute for him to walk away and ignore me now. I had baggage and a hell of a lot of it. No one would want that.
"How long did it last?" he asked.
"About till I was fifteen,"
"That long?" I nodded. "What stopped it?"
My face fell and I looked down at my hands. Here it comes, the deal breaker. "Before I answer that, can you promise me something?"
"Anything,"
I gulped and tears started to come back. "Just promise to still be my friend after this,"
He looked confused. "Alyss, what's wrong?
"Just promise. Please," When he nodded, I looked down at my hands and removed the gauntlets I'd put on that day. He gasped when he saw the scars there.
"Holy shit, Alyss. She did this to you, too?" I shook my head. "Then who…" The expression on my face must have made it obvious. "You did this?"
"I wanted it to stop," I told him, my voice cracking. "I couldn't take it anymore, so I tried to end it. My best friend Nat found me in the bathroom with the mirror shattered and blood everywhere. So she called 911 before I passed out. If she hadn't, I wouldn't be here,"
Jack's look of horror was so painful to see I looked back down at my hands. "When I woke up, the doctors told me I wasn't going home with my aunt. They saw the scars of my back and told me that she'd never do that to me again. They were right,"
"I see…" He said. I didn't look up. I just couldn't do it. I'd finally spilled my guts and now it was time to say goodbye to the love of my life. Damn it all to hell.
He was silent for a long time and then he got up. I waited for him to leave but he surprised me by sitting in front of me. He took my hands and kissed my scars. What the hell? He rested his cheek on my arms and I saw he was crying.
"Jack?" I said, leaning over.
"I am so sorry, Alyss," He breathed, his eyes closed. "I had no idea…You've been through so much shit, I can't believe it," I could have swore I heard his voice catch a couple times. What the bat bunnies from hell?
"You're...you don't hate me?"
He opened those beautiful blue eyes and stared at me. "Why the fuck would I hate you?"
I bit my lip. "I've got baggage a mile high. No one ever wants to deal with that. Hell, even some of my friends stopped talking to me after that,"
His expression changed from confused to pissed off. "Are you fucking serious?" I nodded. "How can they when you couldn't even control what was going on?"
I shrugged. "No one wants to deal with a kid that attempts suicide. Simple as that,"
Now he was livid. He took his hands and grabbed my face so he gently pull it more to his level. "I will never do that. I swear to you, Alyss. I love you so goddamn much,"
My heart fluttered when he said that and now I was crying tears of pure joy. He loved me? Even after he'd seen all my scars and heard the stories? I cupped his face with my hands and kissed him with every ounce of passion I could muster. He returned the kiss with equal passion. Next thing I know, I found myself lying on the bed with him on top of me. His hands found their way under my shirt, gently skimming over my scars. Soon, we started to play out the intro to my dream but it was still Jack who came down and kissed me after his shirt was removed. We made love that morning, with protection of course (Funny how condoms are always hiding in guy's jeans like pocket change). Before anyone would notice, we got dressed and Jack snuck back to his room. I snagged a book I was reading from my desk and sat on the bed to read. I pinched myself just to make sure I was awake and all that hadn't been a figment of my imagination. Ow! Nope, not fake. I couldn't help but smile at myself. It wasn't a dream after all.
Author's Note: Hey guys! Really hope you guys enjoyed this! I changed the rating to "M" just to be safe. When i started this, i wasn't too sure how far i'd go rating wise. Granted, this is gonna be as smutty as i get;s, i still wanna be safe. Hope you guys enjoy. Please reveiw!
TTFN, Ta Ta For Now
