I don't like shopping but I like getting things do you see my dilemma or do I need to continue
Shopping
"Granger – you are – the weirdest girl – I have ever – met," Dean grunted, trying to help Sam pull the girl through the door frame, Bobby watching in amusement.
"I – am – not – going," Hermione declared, gripping tighter on the frame, making a mental note to fix the scratches later.
"Why do you hate shopping? Aren't you female?" Sam asked loudly.
"It's boring! And dull! And there's nothing that interests me!" Hermione stated, making a squeaking noise when her fingers began to slip. She and Dean screamed as they went tumbling into the floor, Dean groaning before Hermione leapt up and tried to dash up the stairs, but Sam had followed her and was trying to tug her from the railing instead.
"He's getting her closer to the car," Bobby muttered, watching as Hermione cursed Dean to Hell for bringing up the idea, only to have Dean respond that he'd been there already and still got out anyway.
"Alright, I'll make a deal with you," Sam decided, tightening his grip on her, "If you come willingly, I will get you any book that you want."
Hermione froze, stilling in his arms, pursing her lips before a small smirk appeared on her face, "Any book?"
Sam lit up a little, "Any book."
"And you'll go up to the register and everything?" she smirked a little bit wider.
"Sure," he shrugged.
She released the railing and Sam set her down on a step below him, blinking at her smirk before she turned around and headed to the door.
"I can't wait to see what happens," Dean muttered to Bobby, who nodded back.
"What'd she make you get?" Bobby questioned when Sam carried Hermione through the door, slung over his shoulder while she and Dean laughed, Sam frowning at the both of them.
"God, I love this witch," Dean laughed, collapsing on the couch and gripping his sides before Sam practically threw her on the couch next to him, although she was laughing just as hard and didn't really react.
"She made me get this!" Sam said, shoving a book towards Bobby, sending Hermione and Dean into another fit of hysterics. Bobby warily took it, eyes widening a little before he began to cough and tried not to laugh for Sam's sake. It had a white background, although there was a lower half of a woman, lounging against something, her legs mainly the focus other than the title. The cover proudly exclaimed "A Guide to Understanding Men – If You Want Closure in Your Relationship, Start with Your Legs." Sam turned back to Hermione and frowned as she tried to look abashed, but failed horribly.
"You," he declared, "Are the worst girlfriend ever."
Hermione only grinned, hopped up, and pecked him on the cheek, still chuckling, "I'll take that as a compliment."
Sam turned to Bobby to explain, "I got a guy as a cashier! He took one look at me, then the book, and said 'honey, I can save you a whole lot of heartbreak, I go on break in five minutes, I've got a room just around the block, we can be done in ten.'"
Bobby finally began to laugh, Dean trying to take deep breaths to breath properly again, but Hermione was hugging Sam and grinning very brightly.
"I am never forcing you to go shopping again," Sam decided, making her smile and stretch to peck him on the cheek.
"Good, that was what I intended to come out of this experience," she said, giving an affectionate yank on his hair before heading up the staircase, Dean and Bobby still trying to regulate their breathing.
It's an actual book I just Googled "ridiculous book titles" and it came up with fifteen of these fuckers
