CHAPTER 8

"Hey there Kratos!" said Dog quietly, taking a seat next to Kratos upon seeing him. "What the heck brings you here?"

"Yeah, WHAT are you doing here?!" asked Error in a loud whisper. "You are on enough thin ice, and you're out in public before completing your court-ordered Bad-Anon hours?"

"Relax." said Kratos. "Judge King Hippo cleared it!"

"Alright everyone, pipe down and shut up!" said Cranky Kong, banging his cane on the ground. "The session has begun, who would like to offer the first discussion?"

The room paused for a brief moment, until one of the participants made a decision.

"OK, I will start." said one of the participants. "My name is Peasant, and I'm an NPC."

"HELLO PEASANT!" chimed the crowd.

"Like many of my fellow NPCs, and many of you here, I've always struggled with the question of insignificance to my game." said Peasant. "There are always so many of me, and we all look the same, I sometimes wonder if I'm even necessary. But it turns out, myself, and my fellow peasants, are very necessary in Castlevania. For who would feed the vampires? Who would the Belmont Clan defend? We are an integral part of the story, all of us."

The group clapped in response to Peasant's testimony.

"I'm Mummy Guy, I'm an NPC." said Mummy Guy from The Metal Slug.

"HI MUMMY GUY!" said the crowd.

"Your experience moves me, and I feel you Peasant." said The Mummy Guy. "In The Metal Slug, it took me years to fit in with the right crowd; I mean, I'm a guy in a mummy suit in an amusement park, and there are actual mummies in the game! I tried to join with the real mummies, and they straight-out rejected me, and I could barely understand their moans and groans too. I tried to intermingle with the Survivors and Big City Civilians, and some found me too scary, while others found me ridiculous, and others just were too snobby to even give me a second thought. We NPCs are often far too undervalued, both by the main characters, and within our own group."

The crowd clapped in response to Mummy Guy's testimony.

"I feel the same way sometimes." said Cranky Kong flatly. "OK, who's next?!"

Kratos saw a bright orange shape, which appeared almost like a mound-shaped blob, but with eyes. The shape sat up, and began to address the crowd.

"BLIP BOMP BEEP BEEP BLIP, BOMP BOMP." said the shape.

"HI UNCLE FESTER!" said the crowd.

The shape continued on in a series of dull-sounding tones, which Kratos did not recognize or understand. Puzzled, Kratos still tried to listen to what this odd shape had to say, but made no progress.

"Who is this?" asked Kratos in a whisper to Dog.

"Oh that's Uncle Fester." said Dog. "He's a NPC that you can see on the tron in the Addams Family Pinball Game. Takes some time but eventually you can understand him. Turns out the guy is a genius."

"I see." said Kratos. "I guess I'll have to give it some time."

"BOMP BOMP BOMP BLEEP BEEP BLIP, BLIP BLIP" said Uncle Fester as he finished his testimony.

The crowd clapped in response to Uncle Fester.

"Ok, move it along, who's next?!" asked Cranky Kong.

"I'm Navi, and I'm an NPC." said Navi from Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time.

"HI NAVI!" said the crowd.

"I too sometimes feel undervalued, not necessarily the same way Mummy Guy or Uncle Fester feel, but in my own design." said Navi. "I play a big role in the game; I help Link along, yet they hear my voice, and see a character without a face. I've always longed for the perfect look, perhaps even looking like a princess, anything! Yet, I've learned in my own trials and tribulations, it's not the face that makes you, but the deeds that make you."

The crowd clapped in response to Navi's testimony.

"Hi gang, 'I am Error', and 'I am NPC'." chimed in Error.

"HI ERROR!" said the crowd.

"Navi, you're an upgraded version of the game I represent, but that doesn't mean our struggles are any less turbulent." started Error. "I play a key piece in the puzzle that is my game. While I may be a NPC, the game could not move forward without me in terms of Link's quest, but the irony of it all is that my very name is a stigma that halts the progress of the player. First impressions have always been hard for me, and it seems I'm programmed that way. I live in the Town of Ruto, and eventually, I impart knowledge to Link about a hidden tunnel that he can use to further his quest. Yet, so many times I find my game either abandoned or drawn out, because the player can't even get past my first name! Upon my introduction, the player thinks my name is nothing but a glitch, but that's not true, Error is my name. For years I struggled with coming to grips with my unfortunate name, but eventually, I learned to embrace it, and see the player realizing that I am who I am, as a small gold medal. For you see, I am Error, I'm a NPC, and I'm a very important part of my game!"

The crowd clapped in response to Error's testimony.

"I Chop Chop Master Onion, and I am NPC." said Chop Chop Master Onion from PaRappa the Rapper.

"HI CHOP CHOP MASTER ONION!" said the crowd.

"I thank you for not crying, as being onion makes it hard for me to interact with others." said Chop Chop Master Onion. "I too hear what Error have to sa, and Error, I can empathize! I have important role in my game, yet outside game, I feel like outcast!"

Sniffling, Chop Chop Master Onion started to tear up a bit, as did everyone else in the room. With a grumbling sigh, Cranky Kong passed down a box of Kleenex, which eventually reached Chop Chop Master Onion, and he used a tissue to wipe his tears away.

"In my game, the journey of a 1000 and above high score, begins with a single point." said Chop Chop Master Onion. "Day after day, I help player reach their goals, and despite being master, I am but a fragment in the game. One single stage, and then, the player move on to the next. Some days, there are not enough stages, and other days, I feel great pride in contributing what I have to my game. As they all say, one game at a time."

The crowd clapped in response to Chop Chop Master Onion's testimony.

Hearing testimony after testimony from the respective groups, Kratos began to see things, from what he felt, as every possible angle. Beyond everything his programming had taught him, he began to empathize with other game characters.

Breaking every rule his game programmed him for, Kratos reached out, and gave a gentle, pat on the back, to Chop Chop Master Onion. Despite the produce warrior's smell, Kratos managed to extend a hand, and pat him on the back, despite Kratos' winced face.

"I too feel as an outcast." said Kratos. "I feel your pain."

In response, Chop Chop Master Onion turned around and hugged Kratos with a mighty bear hug, the crowd clapping in response. As Chop Chop Master Onion sobbed into Kratos' shoulder, Kratos managed a smile, despite the smell of onion that inevitably began to immerse itself upon Kratos' body. Thankfully, Dog passed a box of tissues Kratos' way, which he offered to Chop Chop Master Onion, who quickly dried his tears and ceased his sobbing.

"I sorry everyone, the pressure is too much sometimes." said Chop Chop Master Onion, turning to Kratos. "OK then, why don't you go friend?"

Feeling on the spot, Kratos decided to just spill everything as he did before in Good-Anon, because it felt right to him that way.

"I'm…Kratos….I'm afraid I am not a NPC." started Kratos.

There was a slight murmur from the gathering, but eventually they greeted him with the obligatory "HI KRATOS!"

"Many of you are probably wondering what I'm doing here, being that I'm the pivotal character in my game and everything." said Kratos. "I won't pretend to understand what all of you are going through, either personally or as a whole, but I can share my own experiences with you."

Kratos sighed, then began his testimony.

"Quite simply, I'm here because I'm not sure where I fit into this world." began Kratos. "Everything I remember has been nothing but chaos and violence, and that is what I feed upon in my game. I'm a ruthless warrior, without mercy, everything that fits the typical bad guy or villain personality. Yet, I find myself at the head of my game; not the hero, but not the final boss at the end. The closest thing I could ever relate to with all of you is my cutscenes, where until they give player control, I am at the mercy of the programming for what I do. I first became aware of this world outside of my world when someone from this community came to welcome me, and I treated him like an enemy. By nature, I'm supposed to be hostile in my game, yet outside….well, I guess I'm still trying to figure that out. Maybe I'm here because I'm trying to fit in with everyone I might be somewhat similar to, regardless of our roles in our respective games. So….that's my story, so far."

There was a couple seconds of silence, followed by a massive standing ovation from everyone in the group.

"You said it all Kratos!" said Dog, hugging Kratos and sobbing into his ab muscles. "You can fit in anywhere!"

From that point on, the rest of the characters of NPC-Anon gave their testimony, until the close of the meeting.

The only other meeting following NPC-Anon was DamselsInDistress-Anon, and Kratos knew without a doubt he did not qualify or fit in there, so he did not stick around for the next meeting. Exiting the building with Dog next to him, they both spied Wreck-It Ralph, giving them a friendly wave from afar.

Kratos waved, but before he could respond any further, someone tugged at him. Looking down, Kratos saw it was Toad, from Mario Party, whom he met at NPC-Anon.

"Kratos, I gotta say, I was super impressed with you in there." said Toad. "Even though you don't fall into the solid 'NPC' category, you really seem to get what we go through, and I like how you opened up the way you did."

"Thank you Toad, I thought you provided a great testimony too." replied Kratos.

"And actually, I wanted to see if you'd be interested in a job outside your game." said Toad. "You see, Mario Party is a big area where many from the arcade love to come and hang out, work out, and work both their brains and their minds after a long day's work. Sometimes, people get a bit carried away when they play the games Mario Party has to offer, and so I could use someone to provide some safety and security to make sure everyone plays nice. I've been trying to get Wreck-It Ralph to do it for ages, but he seems to be pretty happy with the demolition company he started all on his own, and I can see that he vouches for you. So, if you'd like to make an extra 5 bonus points an hour, I'd be happy to give you a gig as a Bouncer. What do you say?"

Kratos put his chin in his hand for a moment, mulling it over.

"How rough would I have to be with people?" asked Kratos. "Am I ALLOWED to kill them if they get out of hand?"

"Oh no no no!" said Toad. "No weapons, you'd need to provide just enough force, or intimidation, or a combination of either, to get them to behave, that's all. Sound do-able for you?"

Kratos at first was slightly disappointed about the "no killing" and "no weapons" rule, as that was his go-to solution for most things, but then he realized that this was the life outside of his game.

"Alright, I'll do it, once I finish up with my responsibilities with the court." said Kratos, bending down to offer his hand to Toad. "No more force than necessary, I promise."

"Fantastic!" said Toad. "You're hired!"

Meanwhile, looking rugged and restless, Sheriff Kip Tumbleweed wrangled back home into his game, and into his office. Along the way, he passed the game's main antagonist, Tarantula Tim.

"Hey there Sheriff Kip!" Greeted Tarantula Tim in a friendly manner. "You feelin' OK? You look like you had a rough day! Maybe you should go see Dr. Light over at Mega Man."

"Ah mind your own business Tim!" snapped the Sheriff.

"Alright, no need to get nasty!" replied Tim. "I am the Game Guide after all, gotta look out for everyone here."

"As if you have to remind me!" growled Sheriff Tumbleweed. "I should be game guide here!"

"You sure are more ornery'n a coyote with his tail tangled in barbed wire." said Tarantula Tim disapprovingly. "Sure hope you feel better later, so you have a nice night!"

Sheriff Tumbleweed simply responded by blowing a raspberry in Tarantula Tim's direction as he walked away, and the Sheriff finally made it back to the jailhouse. Upon his return, Paula, his Duck Hunt Duck receptionist, was waiting there for him.

"Sheriff, are you OK?" asked Paula. "To be quite honest, you're looking a little bit….savage."

"Ah what do you know anyway Paula, I'm just fine!" replied Sheriff Tumbleweed. "Anyway, anybody come into the holding cell today?!"

"None whatsoever." said Paula. "Everything seems right as rain in the arcade."

"And what about Prisoner #U91983?" asked Sheriff Tumbleweed eagerly.

"He's still in maximum security lockdown at Legend of Zelda II, you know that Sheriff." said Paula. "He knows better than to try anything foolish, and hasn't shown any unusual activity on the monitor."

"Well, in any case, I might just pay that there crook a visit." said Sheriff Tumbleweed. "Sometimes he's gotta be reminded of why he's locked up tight."

Paula started to speak, but before she could, Sheriff Tumbleweed had already unlocked the main door to the jailhouse cells from the holding room, and opened a lock box behind his desk, containing a large, shining key.

"Call up the tram for official arcade business to Legend of Zelda II." instructed Sheriff Tumbleweed.

"Yes sir, right away." said Paula.

Over the next days, Kratos progressed within the Litwak's Arcade Community, and eventually finished with his court-required obligations. All the while, he had helpful support from his faithful sponsors; Zombie from Bad-Anon, Earthworm Jim from Good-Anon, and Chop Chop Master Onion from NPC-Anon. Plus, he and Wreck-It Ralph grew closer, and enjoyed one another's company.

On the final night of his court-required support meetings, he got Wreck-It Ralph and his 3 sponsors together, and they all headed to Tapper's for a flowing celebration. Dog, Toad and Hermes, also invited, joined in the gathering. The group sat down, ordered up a round, and lauded Kratos for his progress.

"Good job Kraytoast!" said Zombie. "You win game of life! Good bad guy! Urgh!"

Wearing a party hat for the occasion, and a noisemaker, Zombie blew his noisemaker and raised his glass.

"He's right Kratos." said Wreck-It Ralph. "You really got through a tough time, and came out a winner. That's worth more than any medal you can win in any game. So I raise my glass to you….to Kratos!"

"TO KRATOS!" said the group, clanging glasses together in celebration.

"Thank you, all of you, for being here with me tonight." said Kratos. "I may be a ruthless, bloodthirsty, merciless war deity, but at the end of the day, I'm just a lucky guy with great friends."

"Well Kratos, our game would not be what it is without its star player." said Hermes. "I know we're opposites in terms of personality, and I hate it when you rip my legs off during gameplay, but I'm proud to be under the same console as you."

"You're the best Kratos!" said Dog.

"We are here for you Kratos-san!" said Chop Chop Master Onion.

"That's right, however you need us!" chimed in Earthworm Jim.

The group enjoyed drinking and socializing with each other, each genuinely glad Kratos had made the progress that he did. Some minutes later, Wreck-It Ralph spied a familiar face walk into the bar with a couple friends.

"Uh Dog, I'm going to need you to hide like we talked about." said Wreck-It Ralph. "Part of the plan."

"Yes indeed!" said Dog, and he dove into the bar's coat closet.

Just as Dog dove into the coat closet, Vanellopie Von Schweetz entered the bar, followed by fellow Sugar Rush driver Minty Zaki, Princess Prin-Prin from Ghosts 'n Goblins, Yuri Sakazaki from the Art of Fighting, Yorda from Ico, and Felicia from Darkstalkers. Immediately, Vanellopie recognized Wreck-It Ralph, and ran up to give him a big hug.

"BOOGER-BRAIN!" squealed Vanellopie. "How are you?!"

"Doing great Shortypants!" said Ralph, hugging her but not too tightly. "Just hanging out with some friends."

"Me too!" said Vanellopie, her entourage gravitating over to where the group was sitting. "We're having a girls night out!"

"Nice!" said Ralph, then turning to Kratos. "I almost forgot, I've been meaning to introduce you to someone for quite some time. Kratos, this is my best friend in the whole wide world, Vanellopie Von Schweetz, from Sugar Rush; Vanellopie, this is Kratos, from God of War Ultimate Collection."

"Pleasure to meet you Vanellopie!" said Kratos, holding out his hand to shake hers. "Ralph always has such nice things to say!"

"PHHHHBBT! That's hilarious!" said Vanellopie, shaking Kratos' hand. "Anyway, nice to meet you Kratos! Can I call you Mr. Scary?"

Kratos looked puzzled, turning to Wreck-It Ralph as far as how to react.

"It's what she does." said Ralph, shrugging his shoulders. "All part of her programming. Feel free to call her names too."

"Why sure you can DevilGirl!" said Kratos in a feeble attempt to make fun of her.

"Hahaha!" said Vanellopie, turning to Wreck-It Ralph. "I like your new friend Boulder-Head, he's nice and dorky!"

Kratos' eyes drifted almost immediately to Felicia, who narrowed them seductively as she came closer to them.

"I believe we've already met." said Felicia in a sultry tone, followed by a short purr. "How have you been Kratos?"

"Wonderful Felicia." said Kratos. "Even better now; it's always wonderful to behold someone as stunning as you."

"Oh Kratos!" said Felicia flattered. "You sure know how to make this kitty purr!"

"Hey ladies, why don't you forget these losers and come hang out with us?" said a voice familiar to Kratos.

The group looked over their shoulders, and saw a small gathering of male characters, with the owner of the voice at the lead of the entourage.

Toki.