Yes, Jazz and Blackarachnia are immature. But it's funny. And yes, the term 'bat-crap crazy' is borrowed from The Big Bang Theory.
New story recommendation: check out "Paranoia" by TacticianZephine. It's Ember's backstory in this universe, and it's awesome.
Chapter 8
Shuttle, somewhere in space
Jazz slumped into the pilot's seat with a groan. In the two days it had taken them to get to the space bridge that led to Axiom Nexus, everyone had developed an edge. Except for Prowl, of course.
Prowl could much better be described by the human term bat-crap crazy.
"Jazz! I asked you a question!"
"Yes, I know," the older mech sighed. "And we are exactly five minutes closer than the last time you asked."
Prowl stalked away, grumbling too quietly for Jazz to hear. It was probably just as well; the comment was sure to be rude, and after the last two hours, it wasn't like Jazz needed an excuse to punch his friend in the face.
Blackarachnia shoved past Prowl on her way into the cockpit, ignoring his irritated huff at her blatant disregard for personal space. "Hey, Guard ninja."
Jazz snapped. "NO, we're not there yet! YES, we are at full power! And NO, I will NOT help you tinker with the controls to make it better! It's a slaggin' emergency shuttle, not an Omega Sentinel! Go away!"
"Whoa, what crawled up your tailpipe?!" Blackarachnia's optics narrowed. "I said hello! What's with the attitude?"
"Sorry," the white mech muttered sheepishly. "Prowl's been on my case."
"Just shut off your audio receptors. It works with Blitzwing." The technorganic settled into the seat beside him.
Jazz rolled his optics. "I tried that."
"And?"
"He pulled the chair out from under me."
Blackarachnia snickered. "Okay, Prowler's a little touchy after a week in a spaceship. Hasn't he ever had bad travel conditions before?"
"Depends. The last ship he and Bee were on together was an Omega Sentinel. Room to hide. And I don't think a few millennia on a shuttle with just Riella counts as bad conditions. They probably liked it."
Blackarachnia froze for a moment before her optics narrowed and she smirked. "Oh, I'm sure they had fun."
"Primus! That's so not what I meant." Jazz chuckled. "You do have a point, even if they both insist the relationship started on Earth."
"Oh please." The femme winked at him. "You really think they were 'just friends' for two millennia and never got something going with no one else around?"
"For your information, we were, and we never did."
Both of them spun around, Blackarachnia biting her lip to hide the smirk. "Hi, Prowler."
"Don't call me that." Prowl stared challengingly at the window. "Shouldn't we be there by now?"
Jazz groaned. "I thought I told you to go away."
"I did. I came back and found out you two are ridiculously immature. Riella and I managed to be friends and nothing more through our entire training and the following millennia." Prowl glared at them. "Now, how long?"
Another sigh. "Thirty minutes."
Blackarachnia purred. "Are you sure that wasn't a 'friends with benefits' thing? OW!"
Prowl retrieved the shutter remote with a growl. "It absolutely was not. Call me when we're through the space bridge."
"Great. Will do. Get lost."
Riella's Shuttle, Axiom Nexus Shuttle Bay
The femme keyed in her access code with a yawn. The last few solar cycles had been refreshingly Lockdown-free, allowing her to get used to the basic workings of the bar without dealing with his harassment, but she couldn't shake the feeling that something wasn't quite right.
An unfamiliar presence flitted across her mental radar briefly. Not someone who was usually around at this time of night (or morning, if you wanted to get technical).
"Hello?" she called, shifting her visor to maximum night vision. That was one benefit of that thing. "Who's there?"
No response, but the presence flicked across her processor again. A mech. One she had never clearly sensed…
"Who are you? Show yourself!"
Nothing.
"Huh." Riella sighed and re-activated the door, which had closed while she wasn't paying attention. "Someone's got nothing useful to do."
A sudden, intense flash of focus shot through her processor. She whirled, blades drawn and raised. "Get back!"
No one was there. Just the slight feeling of that mech, too far away to be clearly on her radar and too close to disappear entirely.
She ducked into the shuttle and slammed the door, locking it and deactivating the access code. No one would get in without heavy-duty explosives.
Not Lockdown. I know that much. Who else has a reason to follow me? Would his partner go that far? Or do I just have a psycho stalker?
Shuttle, orbiting Axiom Nexus
"Do I have to call him?" Jazz muttered. "Can't I find a parking spot before I get the stir-crazy kid up here?"
"Are we there yet?"
Blackarachnia slumped into the chair. "Yes, Prowl, we're in orbit. Let Jazz find somewhere to land."
"Where are we landing?"
Jazz bit his lip hard enough to hurt. "I. Don't. Know. Probably the main spaceport. We'll find a quiet spot and start looking for her in the morning."
Prowl narrowed his optics behind the blue visor. "I want to start tonight. The more ground we cover, the better."
"No fraggin' way, ninja. Sorry." Blackarachnia flicked a strand of webbing at him, which he dodged. "We all need rest. If Riella stayed here this long, she's not going anywhere tonight. She's got enough street smarts to stay in one place at night in a big spaceport. It's a rough city out there, and Autobots aren't exactly welcome around here."
"Will that be a problem?" Jazz frowned. "I don't like the idea of gettin' into a fight…"
"Not if you cover those insignias and keep your visors on. Pretty blue optics like yours won't go unnoticed." Blackarachnia stood up and stretched. "I'm turning in for the night. Prowl, if you try to leave, I swear I'll tie you to your berth."
"Hmmph." Prowl leaned against the wall with a scowl.
Jazz followed the femme out. "He's gonna try anyway. You know that, right?"
"Of course I do. I locked the door."
Twenty standard minutes later, Prowl was struggling to pry the emergency seal off the escape pod door. "Slaggit, don't they even want to find her?" He managed to make a gap and wriggle through just before it snapped shut. Now, I don't think she'd go to the upper area if she could help it, but she's probably not in the undercity either. I'll check the mid-city levels first, see if her shuttle is around…
If you were curious (shame on you) Prowl is technically telling the truth. No 'friends with benefits' arrangements. Doesn't mean there weren't feelings involved, of course… ;)
