Chapter Seven
Several months passed without much of anything to break the monotony of energon collection and hiding from the 'humans'. Starscream spent most of his time on the bridge watching as the Nemesis drifted over the Earth. No place, especially an organic world, had ever been anywhere near as dazzling as Cybertron, but if he were honest—there were uglier planets to be stationed on.
He spent a lot of time trying not to glance over at Soundwave where he stood only a few paces away from Starscream's spot at the command console.
He was accustomed, after all these years, to being half spiteful of Soundwave and half in want of him. However he usually had Megatron's wrath to fear—and this was more than enough to distract him from a school-bot crush. Not to mention Megatron's occasional interest in not at all professional recreation to, frankly, keep his randiness to manageable low.
Nowadays he didn't have his spats and trysts with Megatron to distract him from other things. He was discovering how blissful it was to be in complete control of the army—too have all that power (he chose to ignore the fact that said power was given to him by Megatron). It was also blissful to be able to speak his mind and employ his ideas without getting slagged by Megatron for not being a blind follower.
He'd always wanted to be leader, and he'd made no secret about his wish for Bucket Head to kick the bucket, but he'd never actually thought it was possible—or worth the risk—to plan an assassination. At any rate, his mind was changing—his taste for leadership was blossoming into an addiction. But with Megatron far away there was nothing for it, so he merely willed Megatron to never return and did his best to prove himself an exceptional leader.
Aside from all that, his weird feelings for Soundwave became worrisome. He just couldn't understand why Soundwave of all Decepticons was the object of his desire.
What was worse was his absolute sureness that the problem would not go away anytime soon, if ever. Soundwave would never return his interest, and he had felt this way for centuries now—the feelings were clearly deep-seated.
It wasn't enough to distract him from his job as second in command, but it was enough to distract him from his ambitions. To become leader would mean to betray Soundwave, there was no denying that fact. Of course, if it ever came down to it, Soundwave could easily defeat him in order to secure Megatron's place as leader. Starscream's greatest weapon was his speed, but Soundwave's mind had long ago been altered, against his will, to be super efficient, he could easily track and predict Starscream's maneuvers in a fight. He was far stronger than Starscream, his plating was more durable, and he had two extra highly flexible limbs to employ as weapons.
Soundwave was very, very dangerous; and fanatically, if such a word could apply to Soundwave, loyal to Megatron. What Starscream really wanted was to have Soundwave's loyalty for himself, this want, more than anything plagued his thoughts day and night.
He tried, for millennium, to figure out why Soundwave was so aggressively loyal to Megatron, but he remains at a loss. Megatron isn't spectacularly intelligent—in fact, he has many times come up with overly complex plots in, what Starscream presumes, must be attempts to prove his intelligence to Autobots and Decepticons alike. He doesn't understand the foolproof efficiency of simplicity the way Starscream does. He wants to lure his opponent into traps he has concocted in perfect compliment to his foe's weakness, whereas Starscream shoots straight for the spark—through the back. A simple violent action that works on anyone anytime.
Yet, he supposes, it may make sense. The way Soundwave's processor works, he over analyzes every bit of data he gathers, perhaps in his mind Megatron's pointlessly convoluted plans are fascinating and admirable.
Which brought Starscream to a preposterous and unwelcome truth, he was jealous of Megatron's relationship with Soundwave. He was jealous of it from both ends. He hated that Soundwave was trusted and revered by Megatron. He hated that Soundwave would do anything for Megatron, but hardly acknowledges his existence.
He isn't as oblivious as he acts; he knows that Soundwave finds him irritating and unworthy. Indifference and irritation do not blossom into anything remotely like attraction or devotion.
He'd had so much time to be aware of his unfortunate circumstance he began to get even more temperamental than usual. Every day he found himself thinking more about what Soundwave was thinking instead of winning the war, he felt less and less that he deserved to be leader.
Thankfully his tormenting thoughts were interrupted at last by the appearance of an Autobot. Many months after they'd given Knock Out his mission they got a call in from a group of drones. They were one of Starscream's special teams stationed at an abandoned energon mine. Optimus Prime had walked right into his trap.
