"I thought already about Leah, Mila, my parents, Isaac, Charlie and the surprise, but broken arm works best." I growled angry, sitting on the step. I dug claws into the inner part of hand. I felt how blood and pain flows down my fingers. The only thing that holds with me remains of humanity. Derek sighed loudly and thought for a long moment.
"What is your most positive memory?" He asked finally. I looked at him incoherently. "The moment you return to when you have a bad day, you're sad."
I took a deep breath, because I realized a sad thing that made me feel tears in eyes.
"Ell?"
"Proposal during a dive on a coral reef. But now it's too painful. I was thinking about Charlie. About how I met accidentally the owners of his mother. "I hesitated for a moment and tried to remember other good moments. "Leah and Cristian wedding. It was something otherworldly. Those were probably the two most positive."
"But all those reminds you about him, right?" He asked, and I looked at him questioningly. "Your heartbeat." I nodded head affirmatively. I forgot about all the tricks werewolf. "And something before you meet him?"
"I doubt it." I muttered dissatisfied and threw a pebble into a tree. It sunk in the tree and it depressed me. "I'm terrible incompletely-werewolf."
"Beginnings are always difficult. Scott said that you talked about it."
"Yes. Stiles with every second word accent how many times and how many ways Scott tried to kill him."
"Not everyone can handle with it in the beginning."
"Derek, it's not about the fact that three times I was close to attack someone. I have since four days I am notoriously changing and I can not control it. During the day, at night. Have you seen Isaac? One wound barely heals and he has two more. Today, three times from seven in the morning he broke my arm, and I do not remember anything. I'm a danger to others. I can not allow it. "
"We'll figure something out. We still have some time. "I clenched my lips into a thin line, because he had never agreed to idea wandering around in my head. "There's something, isn't it?"
"This is just one of the possibilities."
"So you can tell me."
"No."
"Hey, Ell, all we are trying to help you, but you have to work with us. If you come up with an idea you should tell me."
"This is a last resort, if everything else fails."
It took a moment before I bit my tongue, and he understood.
"No ... no, no, no. Crazy?" I looked down and wanted to quickly leave, but he grabbed my hand tightly. "Death, seriously?! You lost your mind?"
"Do not scream." I hissed and tried to wrench myself away the grip. "Derek, it hurts."
"So you will stay a little longer human." He grabbed my shoulders and pushed in front of him without any problem. "Why?!"
"In two days I have to get back to work. To the sick, defenseless people, which can easily kill human, let alone a bloodthirsty beast."
"Beast?! Bloodthirsty?! Are we?!"
"I am! I can not help myself. It's me, who already three times nearly killed Isaac. I have no control over myself. Today I hurt Scott, because he hid and rescue Stiles. I'm a beast!" I threw out a with regret. Between fingers I felt something sticky. Derek's blood. "Don't you see?! Maybe it's good that Kali knows about me..."
"It's nothing. Look at this."
The wound was gone.
"The problem is that not everyone can magically heal quickly."
"A spider web and it's me in the middle, so I twist and turn, but here am I in my little bubble…" For a moment, I stopped to listen to the song and I focused on that what was happening behind the wall. Even I did not have to remove the headphones from ears to know what they were talking about.
"At leastshe didn'tturn into akanima."
"Someone has to stay. She willwant tomeet withKali."
"She doesnotwantto kill meafter whatI didherlast time.Not at all.I almostkill her. We'll befriends.Best friends."
"Fine. I'll stay."
At the moment, everyone fell silent. I could feel their surprise. Eyes wide open and questioning sight directed on Peter. As if their emotions hover in the air.
Steps. A hand on the doorknob. Opens the door. I closed my eyes and bury in the sheets. I clenched my hands into fists.
"Here comes the danger up in this club. When we get started man we ain't gonna stop…"
"You're really do this." He said in surprise. Unbend my fingers and slightly raised a hand. "Effective, but only for a short time. The process of healing too has some limits. "With other hand, he did the same thing like a while before the first.
"Leave me alone." I asked trembling voice, because my eyes have changed color. I wanted to again clamp the hand, but he did not allow me.
"It's a beautiful bedding, and you want to destroy it?"
"I asked you and your psychopathic reasoning to left this room." I growled, sat down and pretty much clenched fingers on his wrist.
"Listen to the nanny-psychopath, because does not jump for joy, too."
He did not react as I wanted, and what's more he looked at me challengingly, then he added insult to injury. Slowly I turned hand. Grimace of pain on his face caused a strange satisfaction. I deepened grip until I heard the sound of cracking bones.
I pushed him and rapidly jumped back.
"Don't!" He shouted and grabbed mine hand unhurt. "See that?" He held hand up to the height of my eyes. I did not understand what he meant. My hands and what? Unpainted nails? Is this the moment when these turn on him sick allusions to the beauty of the skin or something like that? "Normal."
"And how should look like my hand? Without one finger? "He rolled his eyes and pushed his claws. He raised his eyebrows and gave me a smile full of pity. "I usually realize after I hurt someone, so get out."
He shook his head, and I caught a big gulp of air before I broke his hand again. The situation repeated.
"Are you a masochist or idiot! Get out!"
"Actually, I want to show you something. Uh." He said, setting the injured hand. "Oh, God. And you finished college? Medical school? Uh."
"Hale..."
"You don't have a problem, you are just looking in wrong place." He snorted and sat forward. "They tell you to think of nice things, but you live in another reality. You don't think of pleasant things. You heal, operate, save lives. Every day you see death and suffering and fight with them. They tell you to focus on yourself, but you have to focus on others. Helpless. On pain that you can give them."
"What are you talking about?"
"About this what keeps your humanness. About your work. Helping helpless. About your patients that you can crush. About these, which you can save. You control it without pain, but only when you see someone hurt..."
My phone vibrated. New Message. Hospital. ER.
"We have a bigproblem."
Peter pointed to the screen and said:
"It makes you human and you are in control."
"Are you sure?"
"Since eight minutes you didn't try to kill me. What do you think?"
I slumped into a chair in the hallway and shook my head in disbelief. I let a younger intern to talk to family and gave the good news. I laughed when I took off the mask.
"It's crazy, but you were right." I said to Peter. "I could hear her heartbeat. The baby heart. The blood flow in the veins. Incredible. Why did you do that?"
"What?"
"When you were in the living room you wanted me to find Kali. Do not deny it."
"Derek will need help. Full Moon is coming."
"I, beta, against Alfas? This will be my first Full Moon. Indeed rejoice in being a werewolf." I snorted with laughter.
"Ellie" From a distance I heard that Amber pronounces my name and look out for me. I smiled and held out hand.
"When?"
"What?"
"Patient. Give the card and do not say anything. I missed operations." I took the papers and I sent the most beautiful smile I've ever had in my store. I waited until she go away, and again I said to Peter: "Maybe after your miraculous resurrection, your brain does not remember everything, and more specifically, what happens with the human bitten during the first full moon?"
"It just so happens that your first full moon is eclipse of moon. You know what is happening with werewolf during an eclipse? "I shook my head. "Conversely, than during the full moon. We are losing all abilities. In equally clash without any divisions Alpha-Beta you can even kill Kali."
"Oh my God! Run forEllie, probably he didn'thave timeto call her..."
"Where is she?"
"In the waitingbefore theoperating theater."
"Are you sure..."
I looked at Peter at the same time as he at me.
"Cora Hale.His sister."
