A/N: Look! I'm updating faster this time! ^_^ Enjoy.


Chapter 8 – Paris by Night

"So how are things going with Lancelot?" Merlin asked one average day in November. We sat outside the bookshop that day. We were playing cards in the warm sunlight. I know what you're thinking. Merlin's blind. How could he play cards? Well, apparently they make special brail decks for these occasions. Nifty, right?

"They're not. I see him every few days on set. He really does have a minor role… but I do my best not to talk to him outside of characters," I explained as I put down a card. Merlin reached out to feel it before deciding what to do.

Usually I read out what card it was so he wouldn't have to touch it and take up time, but this time I had been speaking. I realized how easy it would be for me to cheat at cards with him, but I didn't. Somehow, I got the impression that Merlin would remember every card I said I put down and when I flubbed up and said the same card again, he'd know… then our friendship would probably fall into rough seas until he decided I was nothing but a cheater at the core and left me… I mean, told me to stop coming. And that was the worst case scenario, of course. I'd rather play fairly and prove I was trustworthy.

"How are things between you and Will?" I asked to get the conversation off of me.

"Fine," Merlin replied, laying down his card. "He went out and bought me a new gift."

"Oh yeah? What did he get you?" I asked, sounding genuinely interested. I was curious to see what Merlin's actual friend would have gotten him. Merlin cracked a grin as though I'd said a joke.

"He bought me a pair of sunglasses and a bottle of vanilla hand lotion," Merlin answered. If possible, his grin got even wider. It infected my face.

"Do you like vanilla?" I asked. Well holy beans on toast – that smile even infected my voice.

"Not really," Merlin laughed breathily. "Will really is shit when it comes to buying gifts. I was genuinely shocked when he said he got me that music CD. I've never even told him I like the sound of the ocean."

"Hm, but you never really told me either," I pointed out smugly. I put my whole hand down on the table.

"True, but I already knew you were more perceptive than Will. He's too wrapped up in his mother and his work to notice much else. He's a good friend, an awesome bloke. He just isn't as attentive as some people," Merlin replied and I wasn't sure if he was defending Will or explaining him.

"I win," I said. Merlin froze.

"You what?"

"I win. Phase 10 complete," I rephrased. Merlin's brow furrowed.

"Liar," he grunted, but I could tell he didn't mean it.

"Read them for yourself." I leaned on the table and pushed the cards an inch closer to Merlin.

He set his hand facedown and reached forward across the table. I gently slid my fingers over his hand until I could guide it to the cards. Merlin barely touched the cards before his head tilted up, eyes looking up toward where my face should be. My eyes were on his hand, pale and smooth on the back, rough but gentle on the front. I slowly moved my finger across the back of his hand while he felt out the cards.

I don't recall exactly when he turned his hand over in mine, but I remember tracing the lines of his palm as though they were something important that I had to remember. I heard Merlin let out some sort of breathy noise and then he tilted his head down, eyes moving toward where his hand was.

"You're right," he nearly breathed out. "You win."

His voice broke my concentration, which I should have been glad for. I let go of his hand, which he pulled back across the table and set lightly on his knee. We sat in silence for a few minutes. I don't know what was going through his mind, but mine was virtually blank.

I wondered what I had been doing to his hand, why I had been doing it, and…. More worrisome, if he would let me do it again. However, beyond these three questions, my mind thought nothing. I didn't contemplate the answers. I didn't try to imagine what he was thinking. I didn't even wonder if anyone had seen. I was just blank.

I reached up to straighten my beanie and frowned. My mind had started to work again. I had a photo shoot in France tomorrow. I had to leave for the airport by three to arrive on time by the company's schedule. I glanced at my watch. It was barely one, but I hadn't packed and the airport was a half hour away. I frowned.

"Sorry. I have to go," I spoke up, breaking the silence. I stood up and grabbed my coat from the back of my chair. "I'll be back from Paris in two days, um… Do you want me to get anything for you? Some kind of souvenir or something?"

Merlin smiled softly. "A new pair of eyes?" he asked teasingly. I smiled and then frowned.

"I wish," I countered. "Still, I don't think French handiwork is quite skillful enough. Anything else?"

"I'm sure you'll think of something," Merlin assured me, standing up as well. "And I won't be crushed if you don't get anything."

"Right," I agreed. I gathered all the cards up off the table and handed the box to Merlin. "Good game. Next time we should try and see if you're as good at chess."

"I doubt it," Merlin laughed.

There was a pleasant silence between us for a moment and then we walked back into the store. Merlin followed me toward the back door as I headed to my car. It had become a slightly common occurrence. Sometimes it made me feel like a girl, being walked to my door after a date… except I was only being walked to the back entrance of a store and this was definitely not a date.

"Well… I guess I'll be seeing you," I said as we paused in front of the large glass doors. Merlin nodded.

Just as I turned to leave, I felt a tug around my neck. Merlin had grabbed hold of my necklace. It was the whistle one. I'd been wearing it when I didn't have work, though I wasn't entirely sure why. It wasn't a particularly special necklace, though it was made out of silver.

"What?" I asked. Merlin wasn't speaking. Merlin pulled a bit tighter on the necklace and I lowered my head to compensate. He was pulling me down like he was about to tell me a secret.

"Don't take this off," he murmured. "It sounds nice."

Sounds? But this whistle never made any noise. What was he talking about? I frowned as I thought. Well Merlin's ears were definitely more attuned to soft sounds than mine were. Maybe my necklace really did whistle as I walked and I just couldn't hear it. I smiled a bit. Maybe that was how Merlin always knew when I walked in. He could hear the whistle.

"Alright," I agreed and shrugged lightly. "See you in three days?"

"See you in three days," Merlin repeated. He tugged down on the necklace more, a strong and swift movement. I was pulled down a half an inch and then Merlin's lips connected with mine. His eyes were shut behind his sunglasses and his breathing was calm, though I could feel his quick heartbeat through his lips.

It was a half minute kiss that took me by surprise and left me speechless. Merlin still held my necklace captive in his hands. My eyes, which had never closed, watched in awed shock as Merlin's eyes reopened behind the colored lenses of his glasses. Merlin's eyes did not attempt to lock with mine. They just stared, forward and open, more toward my chest than my face.

"…Merlin?" I heard myself breathe. Merlin nodded once.

"It's a promise," he said and it sounded like the most important words I'd ever heard. Then Merlin released the whistle and walked away. I was still processing the kiss as I watched him vanish into the shelves.

When I walked outside, the sun hit me hard. I squinted in the bright rays but continued onto my car without pause. As I sat in my car, I decided it was okay to think about what had just happened. Well it wasn't like I hadn't been kissed before. I'd been kissed by tons of girls and plenty of guys – I didn't keep track of how many of those, though it was probably nearly the same. However, never ever in my entire life had I been kissed by someone I actually knew and cared about… well… There was Morgana, but that was for a movie. I turned the key in the ignition. That was when it hit me.

Merlin had kissed me.

I pulled out of the parking space and looked over at the shop. My phone rang with a message from my mother. I shook my head and drove out of the lot. Merlin had kissed me, but I didn't have time to act, much less think about acting. Wait… maybe that was the other way around… Anyway, I had a flight to catch. I'd figure out what to do about Merlin while I was on the plane.


"So the shoot is set to begin exactly at noon. Are you listening? Noon. That means we have to be there half an hour early so you can find your designers before it begins. They'll do your make-up and get you into your outfits. The cameras start clicking at three. We'll be done and out of there by six if everything goes off without a hitch. If the photog gets picky or changes his mind, we could be there till seven, and if they decide to give you new outfits to work with, we could even be in there till eight or nine, but right now we're shooting for six. But you know photographers, Arthur. If you tell them you have no other appointments that day, they'll take all the time they want. Drat. I should have told them you had a dinner date at seven."

"Calm down, Helen. Everything will be fine," I assured her. "If they take an extra hour to film me in sexy clothes, I don't mind. Oh, but make sure I have some shopping time. I want to check a few places for a souvenir or two."

"For your family?"

"Yeah. For my family…. So what's on the schedule the next day?"

"You're getting interviewed by the magazine. Here's the list of questions they plan to ask, but there is always a chance for improvisation. Now, they may-…"

I looked out of the plane window, Helen's voice drifting into a hazy mumble. We were nearing France. It would be late when we arrived at the hotel, but I didn't mind. I didn't want to examine the city of light and love just yet. I wanted to think about… well about Merlin. I wanted to talk to Gaius about it and see what I should do. I wasn't good at expressing emotion. I didn't even know how to feel about this, and that was the scary part. I'd never had a problem understanding myself before. I'd always known how to handle situations like this. You run. You run away from things like this… But I didn't want to run. That was all I knew. I didn't even know why.

The Eiffel Tower came into view then and I gasped. I'd never seen it lit up like that… not in person. I pulled my phone from my pocket and opened a new message. Instinctively, I found Merlin in my phone and began the message.

'I wish you could see this. Paris is beautiful.'

I paused, my finger over the send button. I was about to send a message to Merlin. I didn't even know how to feel about our last encounter and I was going to message him. I may be emotionally inept, but I knew how to tell when I was giving people the wrong signals. What if I wanted to lighten my relationship with Merlin? Would sending him a message about the beauty of Paris and 'wishing' he could see it really be in my best interest right now? I closed the phone without sending.

"Arthur, are you even listening to me?" Helen's voice seemed much too loud in my ear.

"What? Yes!" I answered reflexively, turning in my chair and jumping in shock. I'd actually forgotten she was there. "I mean… Sorry, what?" I gave her a half apologetic half confused look which was probably not as effective as my usual puppy dog look, but it seemed to work… even though it wasn't planned at all and completely genuine. She sighed.

"Okay, you're right. It's not every day you get to see Paris from the sky. We'll go over this again tomorrow after the photo shoot," she conceded. Then she joined me in staring out the windows. I smiled gratefully and she winked. I didn't wonder why. Maybe I should have.


Every time the flashbulbs lit, light flooded my vision. For that blinking moment afterward, the world went black before returning to full and beautiful color. Flash after flash surrounded me. Turn one way. Turn the other way. Chin up. Chin down. Bend the knee. Sit. Stand. Lay down. Hand up by the head, eyes shut. Elbows on the knees, hands folded and eyes looking out over the knuckles. Hat. No hat. Sunglasses? No. Jeans. T-shirts. Jackets – denim, cotton, leather. Suits – pin striped and solid. Sneakers – sketchers and converse. Trench coats and old inspector gadget hats. Necklaces, chokers, bracelets, rings, silver or gold, long or short, bigger or smaller, antique or shiny new.

Flashes. I blinked in rapid fire to clear my vision. The darkness. Temporary blindness. Merlin.

"Arthur, are you okay?" I heard Helen call to me. I smiled over at her and nodded.

That darkness was what Merlin saw everyday… all the time. I wondered if I would be able to handle being blind. Would I go into some mega-drama depression? Would they make a sitcom about me? A movie? Could I play myself in a movie? That could be interesting.

I let out a little sigh. I was letting my mind wander too far. If I didn't concentrate, I'd end up ruining the shoot. Still, my mind kept drifting every time a flash went off. Every time I experienced the momentary blindness, my mind wandered away and to a bookie sitting somewhere far away.

I frowned. In a split second, two things happened. I imagined Merlin, alone in a house of darkness and just waiting for the sun to warm him in the morning. I imagined Merlin kissing me and making my next visit into a promise. I imagined him, sitting with me all these days and talking to me… unable to see a thing. I imagined liking someone I couldn't see, someone I had only ever heard… literally falling in love with someone's voice.

Love? Yes maybe that was part of the answer to my problems. A crush this very well may be. I had never had one of these before, so I wasn't positive on how to continue, but I decided I would send my message to Merlin… because there were no 'wrong' signals I could send with a message like that – not if this was definitely a crush.

So yes, two things happened. The first was me deciding to continue this relationship I had with Merlin, however odd it was for me to decide something like that. The second thing was that the photographer got very angry at me for ruining his shots with a frown and stormed out of the room for a ten minute 'cool down'. Oops.

I walked calmly to Helen, who gave me an exasperated look. She shook her head at me. I just smiled and took my phone from her. I opened a new message and sent my first txt from France. Somewhere in England, a blind man was being stirred from his daily routine. His phone would open the message and he would hear that odd computer voice say 'I wish you could see the beauty of the tower. It is the brightest point in Paris I have seen and reminds me of you –Merlin, you are like Paris by night. Be home soon – Arthur.'

That's when I decided something else too. As I shut the phone and handed it back to Helen, I decided to give Lancelot a call when I got back. I would have called that very instant, but I needed some time to plan out a speech. It wasn't everyday you tried to tell your cousin that you've been jealous of him since he was brought into the world.

Wow. Merlin was some kind of miracle worker – a crush and Lancelot all in one kiss. I couldn't wait to see what happened after a proper snogging.

…. Wait, what?


Preview: So Many Little Details

Ask me why I'm jealous of my cousin. In some cases, that could be all that really mattered… but not to me. As I looked across the table at Lancelot, I had to strictly remind myself not to lie during this confession. No more pissing about.

"You're just trying to change the subject," I accused.

"No I'm not," Lancelot sighed. He took another drink of his coffee. "You're changing… scarily for the better, I think. It's just not like you, Arthur…."

Before I could try to answer or argue, Gaius hung up on me. I looked down at my phone and then stuck my tongue out at it. I felt like a silly child.

When I entered the store, I noticed the music first. I leaned in and closed my eyes. Good lord, this would be the first time I'd voluntarily kissed someone offset.

"Arthur, is that you?"

I watched as my father looked Merlin over again. I could see the gears working and the final realization. My heart swelled. These new emotions would be the death of me.