This one is REALLY short. It was just... difficult to write. I mean, ah! But I enjoyed doing the end. It was all that kept me going...

Please enjoy and please review. I love my fans. Mwah, mwah! - This is me being self-absorbed.


Chapter 7

Flaky Snaky

Oh gosh.

Oh gosh.

Oh gosh.

Oh gosh.

Oh gosh.

Oh gosh.

Oh gosh.

OH GOD.

Sniffles sat stiffly before a mirror hanging nailed to the hallow trunk of the hospital-tree. He was staring at his reflection, his eyes wide, staring at a single random strand of hair sticking from his scalp.

It.

Would.

Not.

Stay.

Down.

Sniffles's eye twitched slightly.

The anteater had tried everything - gel, spray, clips, bobby pins, tape, glue, but nothing had worked. Sniffles dared to check the clock. Seven forty-five. Flaky would be there in five minutes.

Thinking hastily, Sniffles looked around his desk. All there was to use was useless paper and pencils, a protractor, two rulers and a half empty bag of chips. He grabbed another handful of chips and crunched thoughtfully. He searched his drawers but still found nothing. Panicked, Sniffles threw himself onto his bed and checked under the made-up sheets and pillows. He inspected the spaces and cracks in the walls of his room but nothing anywhere was useful. Eventually he spotted something shiny and sharp beneath his bed. Falling to his knees Sniffles reached underneath and pulled out his scissors.

Smiling, Sniffles went back to his desk and held the scissors up. He concentrated. One careful snip would do it. Just one... little...

A knocking on the door. Someone called his name though the thin wood. Sniffles flinched - his hand jerked and he missed the hair, instead closing the twin blades on his small blue ear. Sniffles held in a cry and threw the scissors to the ground. Blood was already running down his face. He clenched his ear and called to the door, "One minute, please!"

Sniffles ran over to his sink but the water was murky green. He winced. No way was he cleaning his ear with that gunk. The anteater looked around. A large hat was sitting at the floor of his closet; it had been a gift from Lumpy, thought the moose had bought it in his own measurements and not Sniffles's.

Not knowing what else to do, Sniffles scooped up the tricolored hat and plopped it on his head. He ran over o the door and opened it.

Flaky didn't look much different, but she was wearing a bracelet and her quills had been pushed down, so that they looked cleaner and smooth. Even her standard dandruff wasn't as bad as usual, and only a few flakes were left. Her fur was glossy with grooming and the scent of strawberries was floating around Flaky's body. Sniffles breathed in deeply. Perfume. Flaky was wearing perfume for their date!

Flippy's words rang deep in Sniffles's mind, but the anteater quickly banished them. That bear didn't have any idea what he was talking about. Standing before Sniffles was Flaky - pretty, kind, innocent Flaky. He couldn't even imagine her thinking of doing the things Flippy accused her of. Sniffles knew deep down Flippy was just jealous of their budding relationship; he wasn't happy, so he didn't want anyone else to be happy.

Sniffles had realized that his words might have cut deeply into Flippy. What he had said was cruel. But Flippy's accusation hurt Sniffles as well. The bear had been suggesting that Flaky was too good for Sniffles, that the porcupine would never be interested in him unless it was to take advantage of him. And Sniffles really liked Flaky. The thought of her only using him gave the anteater a stomach ache.

Flaky liked him. Flaky wanted to spend time with him. Him. The brainy, solitary, not-so-nice nerd. His heart was racing.

"Sniffles? Are you alright?"

Sniffles nodded and smiled at Flaky. She was holding her hands in front of her, nervously looking at Sniffles and then at the ground. Her foot was rubbing against the floor in anxity.

So adorable.

"I'm fine. You look… great, Flaky." Flaky blushed and smiled shyly at the anteater. Then she looked worried. "Sniffles, your hat has a red spot on it. Is that blood?"

Sniffles's hand went up to the hat. He felt a growing dampness spreading. He chuckled nervously, but didn't stop Flaky when she reached up and removed the hat. Gasping, she threw the hat aside and pushed Sniffles back into the room, kicking the door closed with a foot. "Sniffles, what did you do to your ear?"

The anteater shrugged. "Barber mishap?" Flaky shook her head and forced Sniffles back into his desk chair.

And so began Sniffles's first date. He'd cut half his ear off and his date was tending to his self inflicted wounds. Flaky was wrapping the ear with bandages. Sniffles spent this time glaring at that strand of hair, which was still sticking up. It curved like a tiny crescent moon on his forehead. He patted it but it only insisted on sticking back up again. "Stupid hair."

"Hm?"

"The hair. I was trying to cut it and that's how I cut my ear."

Flaky let out a round of hysterical giggles which she shortly hushed. "Y-y-you cut your e-ear trying to cut a s-s-strand of h-h-hair? Really?"

Sniffles blushed. "Yeah…"

"Oh, Sniffles! You're so funny. I don't care if everyone else thinks you're a stick in the mud."

"Gee, thanks – what, what?"

"Anyways," Flaky continued, setting down the Aid Kit and resting her arms on Sniffles's head. "I kinda like the hair. It's cute. Do you wanna go now?"

"Yeah, sure."

So off they went. Sniffles and Flaky spent most of their time walking around, talking, nothing unlike that of any other first date. And as the sun set and the stars twinkled, Sniffles took hold of Flaky's hand and led her down a path into the forest. They were still within boundaries; Sniffles took her to the mouth of a cave and led her inside. A greenish glow pulsed far below.

Flaky stared. "Woah… Sniffles, this is… beautiful…"

Around them were glowing stones and diamonds. Sniffles smiled to himself as Flaky slowly walked down the stone steps to examine them closer. Their glow lit nearly every inch of the cavern. Further down was the reverberating sound of an underground stream. "Sniffles, what is this place?"

Sniffles made his way after her, making sure not to step on any sharp rocks. "I found this place a few years ago. It's nearly right underneath the town. I didn't want to tell anyone about it, though."

Flaky ran a finger down one of the stalagmites. "Why?"

Sniffles shrugged, standing at her side. "I don't know. I didn't want anyone exploiting it. It's pretty – I probably wouldn't' be able to come here if everyone was playing here all the time."

Flaky nodded in understanding. The knelt down and picked up a rock. "Isn't this…?"

"Yeah, it's Kryptonut. This is where they form."

Flaky passed the rock back and forth between her hands. "Isn't Splendid really allergic to these? Like, he gets really sick when he's around them? Isn't it dangerous that they're here?"

Sniffles nodded. "That's why Splendid doesn't come into town much. He gets super weak when he's around them. As long as he's not in the town for too long they don't take any serious effect." The anteater sat down and Flaky settled beside them. They talked some more, enjoying each other's company and the light given to them by this magnificent spectacle.

But eventually Flaky stretched. It was quickly getting late. Sniffles sighed and led her out of the cavern. Then Flaky took the lead and Sniffles ended up at her house. His cheeks darkened in color. "So, I guess this is here our date ends…"

Flaky looked sad. "Oh no! Please, come in. I actually have some cake – leftover from a few days ago. I've gotten into the habit of baking lately. It's probably why you haven't seen me lately." Sniffles allowed himself to be pulled inside. It was dark inside, and Flaky didn't bother to turn on a light. She weaved skillfully past the furniture and into her kitchen, fishing the cake from her fridge. Sniffles awkwardly took his seat on the couch and waited for his date to return. He'd never been in her house before…

The sat and ate. The cake was chocolate and surprisingly Sniffles enjoyed it. He wasn't one for sweets. They ate in silence but Sniffles was pleased at the fact Flaky seemed to be leaning against him as she ate.

When they were finished, Sniffles than expected Flaky to bid him goodnight, but the porcupine surprised him once again. She stretched, wrapping her arms around neck and said, "Sniffles, I hope you don't mind – I have a fondness for cuddling." Sniffles's blush was clearly visible and the female got a laugh out of it.

"I-I don't mind."

Something about Flaky's voice and face had changed. Like a flash, she wasn't shy anymore, but seductive, attractive, deadly. "As long as you don't mind…" The porcupine dragged a finger across Sniffles's chest and sent shivers up and down his nose. "I-I-I-"

"Sniffles, listen," Flaky interrupted. "I know I'm not usually like this. But, something about you…" Her voice dropped as she slid her wandering finger down his nose until she got to the lips of his mouth. She used the same finger to lift them closer to her own face. The anteater was sweating heavily. "I – Flaky – I mean – what?"

They kissed. Sniffles froze, his face red hot, the rest of his body draining of blood. Flaky was kissing him! On the lips… On their first date…

They didn't release. It was a still, awkward kiss but neither of them pulled back. They were waiting for the other to flinch and break it. But then a strange sensation could be felt against Sniffles's lips, and it wasn't just Flaky's. Was that… her tongue!

This was going too fast, much too fast for the fainthearted Sniffles. He attempted to get away, but Flaky chased after him, opening his mouth and entering it with a growl of dominance. Sniffles was pinned down between Flaky and the couch cushions. He struggled to get another breath but after another second he tasted something like blood in his mouth.

Flaky growled again but this was in delight, and the porcupine pulled away from Sniffles, her teeth clenched tightly on his long tongue. The anteater whimpered in pain and was forced to sit up so that she didn't pull on it too hard. Blood was dripping from the bite marks. Flaky wore a wide, toothy grin on her face, scarlet eyes dancing. Sniffles cringed and tried to back away but was stopped by the arm of the couch.

Flaky grabbed hold of Sniffles's tongue with a clawed hand and took it out of her mouth while keeping a firm grip. She then drove her foot into Sniffles's stomach. He moaned in pain. Flaky used both hands to pull out the rest of Sniffles's incredibly long tongue, and once she was done getting it all she wrapped most of it around his neck with a laugh. Sniffles attempted to break free but a hiss and a scratch convinced him to keep still.

The female nodded in satisfaction and, holding the other end of Sniffles's tongue, walked off of the couch and over to the trap door. She opened it with one hand and ignored Sniffles's choking gasps as she walked into the darkness, where moans and wails of pain were floating. Her bloody lips grew into another smile.

"Flaky Snaky, lies and smoke. Kissed the boy and made him choke. No more kids came out to play; she'd locked all up yesterday."