Alex was having a bad day. Honestly, it was horrible.

Not and-here-MI6-comes-again kind of bad, but rather sometimes-it-really-sucks-to-be-a-teenager kind of bad. Which, more or less, meant that it was a really bad time to be "fair haired" and somewhat good an actor. And, of course, it was a bad being friend with Tom Harris right now, as well, seeing as Tom Harris had an obsession with teenage spies who wore dresses.

A rather odd obsession, now wasn't it. Very... special.

Which was the reason as to why Alex was hiding in a closet at the moment. He'd somehow managed to fight off his class during their first lesson (with a little help from their teacher) and also had managed his second and third lesson of that day.

But not without having lipstick smeared all over his face and eyeshadow on his cheeks, along with half of the blond wig stuck on the back of his uniform. They had bloody glued it there.

In short, Alex was not happy. Well, he was glad they hadn't managed to force him into the dress, but he still had Social Studies, English and Maths left. And then cycling all the way backto Wolf's flat.

He tried not to think about what would happen in someone actually was there when he came in, makeup all over his face, probably breathing heavily for hurrying like hell and half a wig stuck on his back. Hm.

But that was later, Alex reminded himself stubbornly, he had other things to think about right now.

Like the fact that Tom had just figured out where he was yet again, and that he'd have to find a new hiding place now. Damn.

~~.._..~~

By the time the end of the day finally arrived, Alex was not only having makeup all over his face and a half wig on his back, but also wore a half-torn, pink dress.

But since he had had to hurry all the time, running between classes and afterwards to the bike, he hadn't had time to remove the dress. Pink flashed everywhere, sun playing on it, making it even more visible.

Alex tried not to think about that.

He lost Stephen and Russell halfway "home", Tom cycling after him for a little bit longer, but eventually also deciding to keep tormenting Alex next day instead.

The spy was breathing a little heavily as he raced up the stairs to the apartment, wanting only to be sure that there was no one following him and to get the dress and makeup off.

He hardly payed the fact that the door was unlocked any thought, throwing it open and tossing his backpack aside, preparing for the race to the bathroom.

Alex cursed quietly for himself, kicking off the shoes, trying to move with the torn dress on. But it was a lot harder than it looked and slowed him down perceptibly. The spy fought the dress bravely, flailing his arms and kept cursing.

It wasn't until he looked up, Alex noticed that he had an audience, consisting of Eagle and Fox.

They just stared at him incredulously, yet both of the men were clearly amused. Well, Fox also had this clear what-the-fuck kind of look.

"What the hell are you wearing?" Fox asked, just as Eagle asked;

"What the hell are you doing?", yet neither made any move as to help the poor teenager in his... suffering.

Alex froze, eyes wide open, horror clear on his features. Shit, they saw him. Like this.

Apparently, Eagle thought this was funny, hilarious, seeing as he suddenly broke into laughter, doubling over and clutching his stomach. Fox just stared at the spy for a bit longer, before he, too, started to laugh.

Alex, only surprising the two men even more, flushed and stomped away, heading for the bathroom. He threw the door shut, muttering about how unfair life could be and how stupid military men could be. And his classmates were quite evil, as well.

But what he cursed most of all, as his bad luck, makeup that wouldn't go away and dresses that wouldn't come off.

~~.._..~~

"Oh, Cu~ub?" Eagle sang, happily.

"What?" Alex asked, suspiciously. He had his back to the other man; the teen was preparing the dinner, as promised.

"Won't you wear this?"

"I can't see what it is, Eagle." Alex pointed out, eyes fixed on the frying pan. "I'm busy."

Eagle pouted and went to stand beside the spy, holding up the garment he wanted the boy to wear. Alex glanced at it from the corner of his eyes, and, instinctively, lashed out and smacked Eagle over the head. It was becoming a bit of a habit.

"Ouch! What did you do that for?" the SAS agent pouted again, glaring halfheartedly at the teen. Alex decided that it wasn't worth an answer and simply threw a meaningful glare at the garment; a dress. Of course. But this time, it was a black maid-like dress with a white apron.

He didn't even want to know where Eagle had gotten it from.

"But why not?" the man asked, tilting his head to the side. "You wore a dress and makeup earlier today..."

"I didn't want to!" Alex exclaimed, blushing again. But he forced the blush away immediately, hoping no one had seen, and turned back to the food. Couldn't afford to burn it.

"Then why...?"

"My business." he muttered angrily. He didn't need K-Unit knowing about the entire school wanting him to play the girl part in a play. God, they would never stop teasing him about that...

"Oh, defensive, are we?" Wolf, whom had come back from work only half an hour earlier, smirked. He had already heard, just as Snake had, about how... special, Alex had looked when coming home from school today.

"Do you have some secret boyfriend with strange fetishes?" Fox asked, looking seriously thoughtful.

Count to ten, count to ten, Alex told himself, taking a deep breath, his grip on the spatula(1) tightening. One... two... three...

"Was it that boyfriend you were with yesterday?" Snake, that bastard, asked as he also took part in the conversation.

...four...five...six...

"That would make sense," Fox agreed, grinning widely. "it explains why our little Alex is so defensive..."

...freaking-seven...bloody-eight...fucking-nine...

"Who would have thought that our little Cub already have a boyfriend?" Eagle sang, though grinning. "I'm so proud!"

Alex didn't reach ten. He was busy enough not lashing out or throwing frying pans and sauce pans at K-Unit. It was very hard.

But he did throw the flour at Wolf and two eggs at Eagle. Fox was standing close enough to them both, so he got struck too. But Snake, on the other hand, got away. But Alex could handle that. Snake wasn't as bad at the others.

The teen felt a lot better after going it. Wolf and Eagle, both of them usually all high and mighty, intimidating men covered in flour and eggs... plus Fox, being an MI6-superspy...

Alex wasn't the only one laughing. Snake was laughing, too, making fun of the men, saying that they looked like a big cake and that only the sugar and the topping was missing.

Eagle was embarrassed, but laughed all the same.

Fox just sighed, admitting that they deserved that, and joined in in the laughing. He was aware of that they must have looked pretty silly.

Wolf was pissed. He didn't like being humiliated and especially not by a teen.

If it hadn't been for Alex still cooking, providing them with edible food, Wolf would have attacked. He did try, he lunged at him, but Eagle was too hungry to let that happen.

But Wolf swore to take revenge.

~~.._..~~

"Your first mission, was that the reason as to why you came to train with us?"

The question came suddenly, yet casually, just after Fox had asked Alex to pass the salt.

"Excuse me?" the spy asked, politely, looking from the food on his fork to Wolf, and then back to the fork again.

"You heard me. Answer the question." Wolf grunted, stuffing his mouth at the same time. The teen resisted the urge to shudder.

"Um, Ben...?" Alex tried.

"Yes, Alex?" Fox asked. Ignorant bastard.

"Isn't this kind of, you know, confidential information? I'm not allowed to say anything, am I?"

Ben continued staying quiet, staring at his food. Alex realized that the man must be interested as well, and therefore chose to not say anything. The actual K-Unit stared at the teen as if trying to read his thoughts.

It wouldn't surprise him if Eagle thought he could... well, anyway.

"Well... yes." the teen answered slowly, but didn't add anything. Maybe, if he didn't say anything after that, they would catch the underlying meaning.

But the spy had no such luck.

"What kind of a mission was that?" Snake wondered. "What did they have to send a child to do...?" he frowned at his own words, not noticing Alex's scowl at the word child.

"What does it matter now, anyway?" the teen asked, off-handedly. "It's not like anything's going to change just because I tell you what I did at any of my missions. Won't do it undone, and I really don't need more people freaking about it..."

His words only made it worse. Wolf's glare grew even more fierce, Fox's face got strangely blank and Snake frowned. Eagle was eating, only listening to the conversation with one ear.

"Cub. Tell us." Wolf demanded, using his alpha-voice. Leader voice. The one he used when he commanded his unit.

"Look, it wasn't anything serious, I've had worse missions. I was sent to investigate a guy who tried to kill innocent people. I stopped him. End of story. Why am I even telling you this?" Alex sighed. "You know what? Just forget it. May I leave the table?"

"Why were you wearing a dress when you came home from school today?" Eagle asked. "Unless you tell us, we just might start think that you have a boyfriend with strange fetishes." the man grinned as he saw the look of horror on the teenager's face. Alex slid back into the chair.

"It's... complicated."

"Then explain." Snake said, softly. Though the slight twitching of his lips, indicating a smirk, revealed how much he was really enjoying this. Even though Snake was the most adult one of the men here, he could be quite bad as well.

"Well," Alex started, reluctantly. Maybe if he told them, they'd understand. He hoped, in vain, for their sympathy and not for them to tease him. But there was a loud voice in head, practically screaming that he was wrong, that K-Unit never would be sympathetic. Especially not in that way. He couldn't really imagine they had any personal experiences to relate to.

"there's this... Annual Festival going on at school, and my class had the responsibility of the play... but they wanted it to be an all-boys play... It's Romeo and Juliet, by the way... and thought that I'd make a good Juliet. So half of the school has been chasing me around all day, trying to force me into woman's clothing." he took a deep breath, preparing for the reactions he would receive at that.

"They totally chose the right guy for the job." Eagle said, after a long, long terrible silence.

If it hadn't been for the fact that it was Wolf's flat, Wolf's belongings, Wolf's china, Alex probably would have been throwing plates and glasses at Eagle right now. And spoons and forks and knives. Hell, anything he could find.

"Good night."

And Alex made a very dramatic exit – he was aware of that, but hey, he was still a teen; he was allowed to be dramatic at times like these – leaving the four men staring after him.

He heard them break into laughter out in the kitchen. Even Wolf laughed, loudly, matching the loud (inane) guffaws that Eagle gave.

Alex shook his head and closed the door. Let them have their fun; he was amused enough by the fact that neither of the four, grown men seemed to have a girlfriend or any real life outside Brecon Beacons and the only fun they had was teasing a fourteen-year-old they barely knew.

Plus the fact that none of them had noticed when he had led their questions about his missions elsewhere.

(1) Oh, god, isn't there a better word than... spatula? Since English isn't my native language and I'm not interested in food-related stuff, I had no idea what word to use. Spatula was the only word I found, and I can't say it's a... well... nice, word. It kind of sounds really weird xD


Btw it was ObsessivelyOdd who "gave me the idea" of K-Unit trying to figure out what Alex's been doing during his missions. I'm just getting started with that, though... just so you know xD