Hello, everyone!
I know I have been rather quiet this year, but that's only because of writer's block and life moving on for me. I work full time now, and as such, it leaves me with little free time sans the weekends. When I do try to write during my break, I find myself more willing to sit back and watch anime/read to recharge my batteries for the next few hours before I can go home. And I've begun to cherish my weekends more, just lazing back and enjoying myself whilst I can. I'm sure a lot of you know what I'm talking about.
However, despite this, I have not stopped writing and have no intention of. I have been chipping away at my stories, acting when I gain a brainwave of ideas, reading new books and now that we're three months away from the end of the year (God, where has the time gone?!) I find myself shaking the cobwebs out of my brain and getting back into gear. I didn't want to force something half-assed out without any effort, so imagine my surprise when I just sort of fell back into this. I have a lot to thank for this second wind, which I'll leave in the endnotes. Don't want to keep you waiting any longer than you already have.
Anyway, this chapter will show Eren and the Guyvers bonding. In fact, the following chapters (sans the next one) are gonna be like filler episodes. While I could do them as separate stories, I'd rather just post them on the same story. Again, I'll explain a bit more at the end.
So, without further ado, please enjoy!
Disclaimer - I don't own Attack on Titan, it all belongs to Kodansha. I also don't own Guyver, it all belongs to Kadokawa Shoten. I only own my OCs.
"Friendship is a type of Trust, and thus, like Trust itself...it has to be Earned, NOT randomly given." Lee Masters.
Chapter Seven: Little Steps (Or, How to talk to your Heroes)
The sun was hot on their backs whilst they trekked deep into the woods, as he led them away from the others. He wanted to spar, to test himself. Tomorrow, all he had learned would be put to the test.
His companion was silent, as he tended to be. He didn't like talking unless he was being spoken to, or if it was someone he was comfortable with.
Finally, they reached a familiar clearing in the woods. A small patch of clear land where the trees did not grow, leaving a fine circular area. It had been their regular sparring place, his training grounds. It was littered with cracks and small holes in the Earth of their previous spares. There was the possibility that he might never see it again, but he pushed the thought out of his mind. There was no need feel such things, not right now.
Now they would fight, now they would see the other's strength, now Eren could see just how well he could hold his own. Compared to how he was when he started six weeks prior.
Once they reached the centre of the clearing, he turned back to his companion. He was standing a few feet away, looking rather bored. "You wanna tell me why you brought us out here, kid?"
Eren's emerald eyes met with the maroon eyes of Estevan Martinez unflinchingly, idly noticing how his eyes reflected the light in pinpoints of red and how the scars on his face seemed to gleam silver. "Tomorrows the 'expedition'," He air-quoted the word, spitting with enough contempt to bring a small half smile to the older boy's face. They both knew that what was coming was merely a cover. No-one else but him, his teachers and his superiors knew. Everyone else was in the dark. "I want to test myself, with everything that you and Josh have taught me."
The older male's brow pitched with interest. "And you choose to just spar with me, just me? Why not include Josh?"
Eren felt a slight flare of guilt at the mentioning of his other teacher but did not allow it to show. He kept his face a steely mask, emotions locked away. Just as he had been taught. "It's not that I didn't want to include him, I just wanted to fight someone who wouldn't hold back. You know what I mean, right?"
"Of course I do." Estevan's voice had not a hint of disappointment and the young soldier felt a rush of relief. Again, he didn't show this. He was slighly vexed that he felt this at all, really. The older male regarded him curiously. "So, you want to spar, but this is just a spar, right?"
"Yeah, of course." Right after the words left his lips, Eren's face contorted. His teeth bared, his brows drawn together, his fists raised, and his shoulders hunched slightly. A simple fighting pose. One that he wouldn't have known of six weeks prior. "But I don't want you to hold back. Give me everything you've got."
Estevan exhaled a breath he had been holding and raised his own fist in a similar stance. His eyes narrowed and turned into red slits, lips a thin line.
The air died down, the world growing quiet as though it wanted to watch the fight itself. The space between the two grew thick and tense, and Eren felt his heart pound in his chest. He was not afraid, he was brimming with excitement. He had been thinking about this for days. Weeks even.
"Let's do this."
Six Weeks Prior
Before today, Eren had been unaware that the Survey Corps had an old base of operations. Perhaps it had been brought up during his teachings and he hadn't been listening, which most likely was the case, but as he looked up at the long since abandoned castle as he patted his horse neck he couldn't help but feel greatly underwhelmed. With greenery growing over the walls, marring stains here and there, and weeds that seemed to have punched their way through the cobblestone grounds, the castle looked like some forgotten ornament that had been left to time.
Fascinating to look at, but not very appealing.
The reason for its abandonment made sense to Eren though, as explained by Oluo Bozado, that its distance between the Wall and the river made it practically useless to the Survey Corps.
Again, nice to look at, but otherwise useless.
"Speaking of him…" Eren glanced to his right and saw Oluo sitting by the area's well. Petra Ral stood by him, looking rather unsympathetic as Oluo dapped at the blood leaking out of the corners of his lips. He had bitten his tongue, rather badly, whilst giving what Eren could only guess was meant have been a threat. He had been more baffled than threatened. Tilting his head ever so slightly, he strained his ears.
"…our exchange when exactly as planned."
"What, um, what happened you? You never used to talk like this. I mean, it's none of my business, but if you're trying to act like the Captain…please just give it a rest. You two have absolutely nothing in common."
"Heh! If you intend to hound me like a wife, babe, you gotta to be more familiar with me before you take that privilege."
"Ha, you wish! Next time you bite your tongue, I hope you bleed out."
"Ho ho ho! Methinks the lady doth protest too much!"
Eren rolled his eyes, breaking his concentration on the continuing conversation. So this was it, he thought with a flash of contempt, the reclaimed Levi Squad? Handpicked by Captain Levi himself? So far, Eren found himself being rather unimpressed. When he was younger, it had been his dream to be like them. To stand shoulder to shoulder with Humanity's Strongest Soldier. But that was when he was younger, filled with childish hopes and ideals. He was older now, and in his eyes, humanity paled in comparison to the might of the Gods. Looking to his left, Eren saw Them standing not too far away.
Them, His Heroes. His Idols. His Gods.
That, in reality, were two ordinary young men.
Eren's mind was still reeling from the revelation, that his two heroes were human. Human. Ever since the fall of Wall Maria, Eren had grown somewhat apathetic of humanity and its ongoing plight with the Titans. While he had not once lost his care for his friends, if anything he had grown to appreciate them more, he had lost something. Perhaps it was his belief that, with enough effort, man could be free. Maybe it was something he had seen in the military, specifically the Survey Corps. But ultimately, the end result was the same:
Disgust, fury, hate.
Violent, angry thoughts that built up in him like a wave of wrath that was just begging to be unleashed upon something. And, he remembered, embarrassment. The human race was so pathetically weak, and it loathed Eren to no end that he was part of their species.
"Or was." Eren bitterly reminded himself that, at the moment, what he was was debatable. Was he a human who could turn into a Titan, or a Titan who could turn into a human? Either way, he was feared and would most likely be killed by the slightest wrong move.
Well, that didn't matter. Not now, anyway. For underneath all those violent emotions lied one lighter feeling: Elation. Eren had to contain himself, otherwise, he would squeal like a little girl. It overjoyed him to no end that his heroes had returned, nearly moving him to tears when he had first seen them in Trost. At the time, Eren had put off any wish to start a conversation, focusing on the mission at hand and not wanting to dawdle on anything meaningless. Then the trail happened, which was an experience Eren would rather not repeat. But now all that had passed, he was free to speak to them.
The question was, though, what could he talk about with them?
It was ironic, really. For most of Eren's military training, for the past five years, he had imagined he and the Guyvers getting along like a house on fire. That they would click easily without a hitch. But now that they were actually here, in the flesh, he couldn't think of anything that wouldn't make him seem like a total ass. The thoughts of a child were wasted on him. He was brought out of his thoughts when he realised, to his horror, that the boy who was Yin was looking at him.
Emerald met brown for a moment that stood far too long.
Feeling his face heat up, he quickly pretended to be tending to his horse whilst trying to make himself as small and invisible as possible.
"What's the matter?"
That was the question, wasn't it? What was the matter?
Not with him, though, not with Joshua Martin, but with Eren Yeager.
It would be a huge lie to say that Josh wasn't glad to see Eren again. In truth, he was thrilled.
He had been heartbroken when he had been told by Mina, whom he also hoped was alright, that he had died mere moments after he had returned to this world (a matter he and Estevan really needed to talk about). He had put the pain aside, focusing on protecting the others, only to later be flooded by unfathomable relief when he held the boy in the palm of his hand. This world, Josh began to see, had no shortage of surprises.
And now that Trost was safe, Eren's placement in the military sorted and his life spared for the time being, that left the Guyvers a large window of opportunity. In which, they could get to know the boy.
However, that posed quite a problem for Josh.
By nature, the Brit was anti-social. He preferred his own company and the company of those he was comfortable with, like Estevan. When it came to new people, however, it always posed a challenge. Being a holder of a Guyver Unit made the problem, even more, server, due to the fact most people were intimidated by the knowledge that he could kill them with a flick of his wrist.
It would take time, Josh knew, but he was concerned that it was time they wouldn't be able to spare.
"Josh?" Estevan's voice brought him back to reality.
"Nothing," He said smoothly, looking at his brother's questioning face. "Just thinking."
Estevan grunted and looked up at the building. Josh wanted to say it was a castle but kept the word behind his lips. "So this is where we'll be staying?" He said to no one in particular. It was a needless statement, a spark for conversion. Sadly, it wouldn't blossom into a flame. Estevan scowled, unimpressed. "What a shithole."
Josh silently agree, humming so his brother knew he had heard him. With the overgrowing greenery, stains and weeds, the younger brother had to admit that the building looked very unappealing. He didn't even want to begin to imagine what kind of incest had made the place their home, the cobwebs of spiders and thick dust. The ideas made his stomach curl. But he kept the thoughts to himself because he knew that it couldn't be helped. The people of this world didn't have the luxury to spare time maintaining an old base, that and it wasn't like there would be any five-star hotels around either. This simply was, Josh acknowledged, how things were in times before electricity.
"Another issue," The Brit realised, lips pressed into a thin line. The brothers had lived off the land before, so the conditions that this time would present weren't entirely unknown to them. However, during those times, they at least had basic technology on hand, like phones and such if certain situations arose. They didn't even have those on them, but then again, they would have been completely useless anyway. If Josh had his phone, he would have destroyed it anyway, instructing Estevan to do the same. That technology didn't belong in this world.
A cool breeze rush by and he shivered, rubbing his left arm. The feel of the fabric made him look at it, at the white long sleeve that hung out of the black shoulder, and he grimaced at the damaged done to his suit. "This was good suit too," He thought glumly, before feeling a chill in his right foot. Cover only in a black sock, he could feel the fresh grass and dirt beneath the sole of his foot. His grimace deepened, "And these were good shoes."
Idly, he noted that it had been at least a week since he had last felt the air and sunlight on his real skin. It was remarkable how alien the sensations felt. He wondered if his brother felt the same way.
"This is a major problem." The Brit's ears perked at the low, deep voice of Captain Levi. He and his brother turning, they saw Levi standing before two of his men. The short man's face was lined with hard, grim determination as though he was about to embark on a hellish mission. Josh quickly found himself focusing more on the man than he did his poor clothing. "We'll begin immediately."
Unconsciously, a thing that happened quite constantly to them, both brothers uttered the same thing in perfect unison: "Begin what?"
Squeak-Squeak
"This is ridiculous."
"Uh-huh."
Squeak-Squeak
"We deserve more respect than this."
"Yep."
Squeak-Squeak
"And you're not even listening to me, are you?"
"Mm-hmm." The window went squeak-squeak as Joshua cleaned it with a wet rag. He was standing, or rather crouching, parallel to the sky above and ground below; a bucket of water levitating beside him. He stood, overlooked his work before nodding in contentment and walking up to the next one. The sight of a boy walking on the walls was not lost to the others who, Estevan noted, were drawn away from their work to watch slack-jawed as the young boy walked upwards without any human assistant or a care in the world. In any other circumstance, he probably would have found their expression hilarious. But his current mood wasn't allowing so much as a smirk to grace his face.
Estevan heaved a heavy sigh, fighting the urge to throw something at his little brother's head and to roar at the gaping soldiers. He too stood parallel to the sky and ground but instead of cleaning windows, he had almost cracked a bucket over the little bastard's head when he had shoved it into his chest, he was burning vines off the wall. He looked down sorrowfully at the burning growth, the ashes flying above him in the wind, and wondered what the hell Josh had been thinking.
It was not unlike Josh to do something without complaint, even when that involved degrading themselves. By nature, the Brit was just a good person who wanted to help others when he could. Estevan was not like that, though. No, the young American valued his dignity a bit more than his brother tended to. He, unlike Josh, took maintaining his image very seriously (though that wasn't to say that Josh didn't take it any less seriously). He was a Guyver, for God's sake! A saviour, a protector, a warrior. He used his powers to protect people and destroy evil in all shapes and forms, to finish the battles others were too weak to do themselves. His powers were certainly not for cleaning.
"We could be out there right now, beyond the Walls, killing Titans." He thought grouchily, grabbing another vine. Power leaked from him and into the vine, weakening its structure until it became brittle and weak before he promptly torn a good length of it free from the cobblestone structure. "Instead, we're stuck here cleaning a dirty fucking house!" It took all his self-control not to use his Mega Blaster on the castle and reduce it to rubble. That, and to rip that Levi prick limb from limb. "How the literal fuck did Josh talk me into this?!"
A foolish question, really. Joshua had a knack for talking people into doing things.
To say that Estevan was not enjoying his situation would be a complete understatement. And not just the cleaning, which was humiliating in its own right, but the entire situation in general.
It was a matter he and Joshua really needed to talk about. He had put it out of his mind, ignored as best he could whilst they were battling Titans and stopping those cowardly bastards from killing Eren. He had almost gratefully forgotten about it whilst he, Josh and Eren slaughtered the remaining Titans in Trost and then had their trail. But now that was done, and they and Eren were safe (for the time being), the truth became crystal clear to Estevan: that they were stranded.
That was the sum of it, right there. He and Joshua were stranded. There was no way for them to get back to their world. Their Guyver Units, while far superior to an average Unit, didn't have the power to breach worlds. They didn't even know that such power existed. To make a bridge between worlds, to open doorways between universes like opening a sealed vault, that kind of power sounded as though it should have belonged to the Advents. Not Zoalords.
Not him.
"I bet you're laughing your ass off in hell aren't you, you bastard," He thought scathingly, murderous fury bubbling in his chest. His blood pounded in his ears, drowning out the world. He could see him clear as day: a devilishly handsome face that was only a skin-deep mask for a monster. "You didn't just send us to a different world, but you sent us in its future as well. Your final move: condemning us to deal with this world's shit."
Was he trembling with contained fury, or was that the world trembling in fear of him and his wrath?
"Oi, Estevan!" The soft, even voice sliced through the red haze in his mind. He looked straight ahead, seeing Josh kneeling before another window. Of course, he'd notice. "Unless you want the Captain to be up your ass for slacking off, I suggest you get back to work." It almost sickened Estevan at how much like a soldier he sounded. Almost. And no sooner as he said it, Josh went back to cleaning the window before him.
"My boot will be up your ass in a minute, you little-" Another resigned sigh left Estevan and the world stopped trembling. Well, he guessed, there was no point getting worked up over the matter now. The day was still young and he had plenty of time to talk with Josh about their situation. With any luck, the Brit would start the conversation first. He more often than not did.
And the cleaning? Well, let it never be said that something so small would be his end. He'll do it, this time.
A window opened to his North-West and the short man who was quickly becoming his enemy appeared.
Levi noticed him, their eyes met and the world felt as if it came to a grinding halt. Even with the distances between them, Estevan could clearly see the older man's dull blue eyes. He watched him remove a cloth around his mouth, clearly some kind of pre-age sanitary face mask, just so Estevan could see his mouth drawn into a thin, unintimidated line. Estevan sent him his own cold glare, suddenly very glad that he was parallel to the sky. The sun was peeking out through the clouds and his eyes would reflect the light in crimson glows whilst the scars lining the left side of his face would appear silver. But to his irritation, as far as his sharp eyes could see, Levi's face didn't so much as twitch.
Then something got the Captain's attention and he looked away. The moment ended.
Estevan sighed once more, feeling hollow as the rage drained from him. A sudden thought came to him: "Captain Levi. Just Levi. No last name. Who the hell are you, soldier?"
"I'm going to check out the rooms you've clean," Captain Levi stated dispassionately as he sauntered past Eren without so much of a glance. "Do this one," And with that curt order, he left Eren alone in the room.
Eren didn't mind the lack of company, it gave him time to process what the Captain had just told him. It gave him time to reflect on everything that had happened since he woke up three days ago. He looked out the open window, at the lush trees and blue sky and beyond.
He was under no illusion that people were sceptical of him, if not downright afraid of him, thinking that he'd transform at the drop of a hat and kill everyone. He was ready to be hated and accused of being what he was. He was ready to endure a lonely, despised existence here among the Corps. It was only natural. After all, how many years had people here spent killing Titans? How many people had lost the people they loved to the Titans?
At least, that's what he told himself.
It was surprising how numb Eren was to everything. He had done it, achieved one of his (of many) childhood dreams. He was a member of the Survey Corps, a member of the renowned Levi Squad no less. But what should have been a sweet victory tasted like ash on his tongue. He could still hear the Captain's utter deadpan words echo in his head, "Good news, Yeager. You're now an official member of the Survey Corps." Words that should have made him feel elated, overjoyed, instead made him feel like his stomach was going to bloat with sickening dread.
Eren's gaze went from the window to the ground, the cold unfeeling cobblestone. He tried to focus on them, tried to ignore the pain blistering in his chest. His face contorted, a familiar burning swelling behind his eyeballs. They were going to make him sleep in the basement, they were going to keep him locked away like some kind of feral beast -
"Don't worry, Eren." Nearly leaping out of his skin, the boy turned sharply to see the voice's owner. His startled forest green eyes met kind sunset orange.
Petra Ral offered an apologetic yet understanding smile once she saw his expression. "You seem upset. Trust me, it's nothing to be ashamed about. The Captain always leaves that impression on people who meet him. He's short, temperamental, not exactly a master of social graces and downright unapproachable. Not what you were expecting, right?"
"That's putting it mildly," The real Captain Levi was nothing at all like Captain Levi that Eren had all but worshipped back when he was a child. Back before everything went to hell. Back before they appeared. However, he decided to correct his (rather short, he noted) superior. "It's not that, really. It's more the fact that he's so dead set on following the higher-up's commands."
A look of weary, amused understanding covered Petra's face. "Ah, I see. You thought because he carries a lot of weight that he wouldn't be concerned with rank or care about the command structure?"
"Isn't that what the Guyvers do?" Is what Eren wanted to say but he kept the words firmly locked in his heart. He knew that, should he speak them, it would more than likely sour his already poor relationship with his comrades. That and Eren had no idea if any of the warmth Petra Ral was expressing was actually genuine. She wasn't looking at him as though she expected him to rip her throat out at the slightest provocation, had no weapon on her person (save a broom) and he decided to take that as a good sign. "Well yeah," He said instead, scratching the back of his head. "I thought he wouldn't take orders from anybody."
"I don't know all the details, but..." The woman paused, made a small show of looking around for anyone else besides them before she leant forward slightly. Her voice dropped to the tone one would use as if they were trading a secret. Eren, intrigued, leant forward himself. "Time was he would have lived up to your expectations. Apparently, he used to be a notorious thug in the city's underground market."
Something must have shown on Eren's face as he jerked back in shock, Petra giggling lightly. The boy was suddenly struck with the image of Levi beating the ever living crap out of some poor drunk in some piss-soaked ally. But when he compared this information to the Captain's already, admittedly, thuggish features, it didn't seem that improbable. "Then how...I mean-"
"Who knows? So many people have different theories. The most popular though involves Erwin. They say he dragged him to the Corps kicking and screaming!"
"The Commander?!" Eren was quite sure that his mind had been blown wide open. It was simply impossible to believe! Commander Erwin, unflinching and brave, bringing a thug into the Survey Corps?!
"What's going on?" The seemingly fixed face of Captain Levi appeared from the doorway. Petra flinched and immediately begun sweeping the floor, looking quite resilient to not look Levi in the eye. Eren went very still. There was an unpleasant gleam in the short man's eyes.
"Your cleaning is lamentable," Levi grunted, glowering at Eren as if he had done something truly unforgivable. The boy was suddenly quite concerned for his life. "Do it all again."
Eren made an odd, squawking sound as his mouth fell open and failed to produce words. Out of the corner of his eyes, he saw Petra stifle another giggle. That's what the Captain was upset about?!
Seriously, what was his deal?! It had taken Eren half an hour to clean the room the first time, and now Levi wanted him to do it again just because it wasn't up to standard?!
Just as that familiar feeling flickered and burned in his breastbone, like so many countless times before, sounds from outside caught his attention. It started off distant before gradually sounding as though it was right outside the window. No, it quickly dawned on Eren that the sounds were coming from outside the window. In fact, it sounded like singing:
"Don't stop me, NOOO~OOW!
I'm having such a good time
I'm having a ball!
Don't stop me, NOOO~OOW!
If you wanna have a good time
Just give me a call!"
Eren, instantly recognising the voice, found any and all anger draining from him as he rushed to the open window. Turning his body to save himself from having to crane and subsequently strain his neck, he was rewarded with the sight of Guyver Yin cleaning the window above him. He was on his hands and knees above the window, washing the upper part of it whilst a bucket floated in midair beside him. The White Guardian, Hero of the People, cleaning a window like a lowly grunt. As he continued singing to himself, it quickly became apparent to Eren that he wasn't noticing his wide-eyed stare. The boy's stomach twisted uneasily.
A hand roughly grabbed the back of his uniform and he was promptly dragged away from the window. He met Captain Levi's eyes, on a face that was now uncomfortably close to his own, which held a gleam that made his stare much for threatening than it had been before. "I said get back upstairs," He said, voice soft and dangerous. "Now get going."
Eren found that his current fear of punishment at the hands of Captain Levi was greater than any wish he had to speak to the Guyvers. He felt a dull throbbing in his right incisor. "Y-yes Sir!" He quickly made his way out of the room, avoiding Petra's eyes, a slight smile tugging his lips when he then heard the short man bark irritably at the hero.
He found that the idea that the Captain was annoyed that he couldn't clean the windows as easily as the Guyvers could not completely implausible.
With so small amount of effort that it bordered on non-existent, Estevan pushed the door open.
He cast his apathetic gaze around the room. It was, shockingly, another bedroom. This one had certainly taken a pounding from time, thick with dirt, dust and cobwebs. His eyes, nose and ears picked up on the smaller details, ones that a normal person would have missed easily. He could see the particles of dust floating in the air, illuminated by the light that just got through the dirty window. He could hear the spiders and other creepy crawlies scurrying on the walls, near their webs. He could smell the dirt that had collected on the ground beneath his feet, an earthy odour that just came close to being unbearable.
His object was clear: Clean the room.
His way to do it was even easier.
He made his way to the other end of the room, opening the wind. Once that was done, he placed himself in the centre of the room and took a breath. He rose his right hand until the symbol in the centre of his palm was in level with his eyes and rotated it at the wrist. The glowing outline of a circle appeared on his forehead.
Behind him, the door closed shut.
Fresh air from outside flowed into the room in a manner more in-fitting with water, rolling around the area like invisible waves. Estevan stood solid, his hand the only thing moving. Gradually, the flow of wind begun to increase and move faster, to the point where it seemed as though the young American was at the centre of a small, weak tornado. After two minutes, Estevan's body tensed and he thrust both his hands forward. A wave of air flew over his shoulders and head and out the window. He didn't need to open his eyes to see that the wave was tinted with dirt, looking to those outside like the castle had released a puff of smoke.
The deed was done, he straightened, opened his eyes and twitched his fingers. The window closed quietly. He looked over his work, allowing himself to take pride in his-
"Ah shit." To Estevan's frustration, the bed's sheet and pillow (which had been quite dirty) were gone. It didn't a genius to guess that they had been picked up in the swirl of manipulated wind and sent out the window. The Captain would have a field day if he learnt of this and Josh would, more than likely, have a good laugh at him. The scarred boy decided that was something he really didn't need, lest he accidentally ripped off the Shorty's head.
But just as he made his way to the door, he stopped. A buzzing rang through his ears. He turned his head, maroon eyes locking onto the small black dots that flew through their air. Estevan's eyebrow twitched. How, in all the levels of Hell, had that Fly managed to not get swept away by the wind? He decided, as he stood very still, waiting, that he didn't want to know the answer.
The Fly eventually decided to take a rest on his right arm. Slowly, Estevan raised his other arm. His left hand came down inhumanly fast, so much so that is appeared to slap onto his right arm in the blink of an eye. There was a minor shockwave of compacted air, making the American's clothes flutter briefly. The whole room seemed to shake for a moment, dust falling from the crevices of the cobblestones.
Estevan pulled his hand away—and the Fly buzzed as it flew off. His jaw parted slightly as he watched it go. His hands shot out, one after the other, faster than the normal human eyes could track. Each grasp of air they took sent out shockwaves. By some improbable luck that had befallen it, the Fly avoided each grab.
As if mocking his efforts, the Fly landed on Estevan's face. On the left side, on his scars in facts. Very slowly, Estevan rotated his left hand until his palm was parallel to the ceiling. Then it collided with his face with the same force of a 5000 series Train going at full speed.
Okay, that hurt. Ow.
The Fly buzzed off and Estevan was enveloped with a cold fury. His hands dangling at his sides, his face (which now sported a smarting red hand print to go along with his scars) became perfectly blank. His maroon eyes shrunk into dots, homing in on the Fly.
His object was simple: KILL THE FUCKING FLY!
And then he disappeared. Or at least this is how it would look had anyone else been present at the time. Had anyone else been there, they would have been witness to Estevan Martinez reappearing and disappearing at different points in the room, shockwaves of air generated by each clap of his hands, frozen in his attempts at swatting the Fly.
And yet the buzzing little insect just—
wouldn't—
die.
Then the door opened and the Fly made a retreat and he followed with hands moving for the kill only to see Josh's face-
SLAM! Estevan's hands, which had been moving at superhuman speed, were formally introduced to the sides of Josh's head. Were Josh a normal human, his head would have been crushed like a watermelon in a hydraulic press. Fortunately for him, and rather unfortunately for Estevan, that was not the case.
As he pulled his hands away, the older brother saw that the younger brother only suffered similar smarting hand marks. On each side of his face. The Brit blinked slowly, face showing not a jot of pain, and a very unimpressed "ow" fell from his lips.
The American opened his mouth to offer an apology, to blame it on that satanic Fly, but no words left him as it was swiftly covered by Josh's hand. The Brit looked side to side, making sure they were alone before he promptly shoved Estevan back into the room. Estevan backed away to gain some personal space, scrubbing his mouth clean. The boy's hand smelled like an old book. "What are you doing?"
"We need to talk." Josh uttered lowly, closing the door behind him with a flick of his wrist.
"About what?" Estevan hated the sudden anxiety that stabbed into him. Was Josh intending to talk about their predicament now?
When the young Brit replied, his words blew away the heady anxiety in Estevan's chest and made him forget all about the damn Fly. Idly, he noted that he was meant to be concerned about some little task, but found himself incapable of remembering what it was.
"About what I and Commander Erwin just talked about."
Earlier
"Guyver Yin." The smooth voice, unlined by cool authority, broke Josh out of his inward singing.
Putting a pause on his cleaning and silencing Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody as it played in his head (Captain Levi had been very vocal in his displeasure at him signing aloud), he looked up and was greeted with the sight of Commander Erwin and a stocky man with a moustache. If his memory served him well, which it more often than not did, his name was Mike. "Commander," He greeted with a respectable dip of his head.
Erwin had a small, pleasant smile on his lips that seemed almost out of place with his eyes. They were blue and piercing, like a hawk. Watching Josh with rapt attention, as if he were evaluating him or expecting him to attack. Just from seeing those eyes, Josh knew. He knew that Commander wanted something from him. He kept his face blank, offering nothing for the man to pick up on. "Forgive me if I'm making unjust assumptions, but from what you said in the courts, I get the impression that you and your brother don't know much about our world."
The look in the man's eyes hadn't abated, but his words had gotten Joshua's interest. "That's quite on the mark, to be honest."
The Commander gestured to the path he and Mike must have walked to meet him. "If it's no trouble, I'd like to discuss this world's history with you. Also, what with your experience and knowledge, I was hoping you could help us with strategies on reclaiming Wall Maria."
Josh continued to look up at the Commander (Well, technically he was looking down, as he was kneeling above the window he was currently cleaning. That was the problem when one had the power to manipulate gravity, directions were often skewered), studying the man's face. It offered nothing that suggested an ulterior motive, nothing sinister, yet the look in his eyes-
"I'm looking too much into this."
Standing tall, Josh walked down the wall of the castle. His bucket of water levitated beside his head, following his decent. Once he made it back to the ground, the bucket gently placed itself on the ground. The look of barely concealed awe on Erwin's face, coupled with the open surprise in his eyes, made Josh smile. These reaction he and Estevan were getting weren't going to get old anytime soon. "Lead the way, Commander."
Barely ten minutes later, Josh found himself within Erwin's office. It was, he bet, the best room in the whole castle. It must have been cleaned first too because it looked immaculate and already felt quite homey. The White Guardian looked over the room, taking in the features. Two full bookshelves, two settees with a small table between them, high-priced looking curtains draped over the window behind the main desk that Erwin quickly sat behind. Mike moved to stand before the window, looking outside.
Josh's eyes quickly fell upon the paper that took up a good portion of Erwin's desk. He pointed at it, "The formation you plan to use?" It was never good to assume, so the saying went, but whenever Josh did he was more than often right.
This instant was no exception as Erwin nodded in confirmation. "This is the formation we use when scouting into Wall Maria. It was devised as a means to avoid Titans so there could be fewer casualties."
"That's great," Josh said, genuinely pleased and he allowed it to show on his face. If he were to understand the sketch correctly, each group warns the other of possible Titan activity and then the others can move to avoid them. It was simple and logical and Josh instantly loved it because of that. "Does it work?"
"Yes, it does minimise the number of deaths. However," The space between Erwin's thick brows crinkled as he looked down at the sketch. "On average, casualties are always thirty percent."
"Thirty percent."
The statistics, the horrible rounded sum of lost life, hit Josh like a punch in the gut. He felt it, blowing the wind out of his lungs in a rough exhale. Any joy on his face quickly left, like water flowing down a smooth surface as the full weight of that statistic hung on his shoulders and made his head lower. There were no words he could say, nothing he could think to say. What could he say? Suddenly, Josh felt like he was going to be violently sick.
"My fault."
All that life, all those people—
Dead.
Because of him.
"All my fault."
Josh had to think of something else, anything else, lest he allowed the world to rise up and swallow him whole. And what better to talk about than ask the obvious question. "The Titans," Months of practice came into play and Josh forced his eyes to meet Erwin and kept his voice levelled and controlled. The man was still watching him, hardly blinking. Hardly twitching a muscle. The Brit was a little bit more than unnerved. Had the blonde notice anything from his momentary plight? "What are they?"
"We don't know."
"You're fighting against an enemy you know nothing about?" Why bother mincing his words?
"No information exists that explains the origins of the Titans. It's said that they first appeared over a hundred years ago, driving humanity to the brink of extinction. Those that survived the onslaught constructed the Walls: Maria, Rose, and Sina. We lived behind those Walls since, in peace, with us, the Survey Corps, fighting against the Titans. That is, as I'm sure you're aware, until the Colossal and Armored Titan appeared."
"I am," Josh's heart felt heavy, like a ball of lead and he found himself looking away from the man. It was suddenly very hard to look at him. "My brother and I were there when it happened."
Erwin went on as though he hadn't heard him. "The only way we can regain our lost lands is by sealing the breach, but that's easier said than done. And now Eren's unknowingly made the task more difficult."
Josh looked back, raising a brow. "How so?"
"The route from Trost was the most direct way to Shinganshina, the same route we've been using for the past five years. But now that that's been sealed, we have to work around it. We intend to ride south from the Karanes District, towards the breach. If we seal them accordingly-"
"You will be able to reclaim all the land you were forced to abandon five years ago, yes, I understand." Josh decided to finish for the Commander.
Erwin nodded, unfazed. "I want to know if there are any changes that you feel are needed to be made to the formation."
"On our world, battle plans like these are primitive. Warfare is in such a way that different means to managing battles have developed. That, and my brother and I didn't use strategies like these for the enemy we were fighting. But, after looking over this, I think it's fine." Josh looked at the bookshelf on his left, eyes scanning over the spines. They were all military and history books, nothing fictional. Well, there went his hopes of finding something interesting to read. He walked over to it, saying, "You remember what I said in the courtroom? About weapons?"
"Yes, I remember." He felt Erwin's eyes on him, never leaving him as he pulled out a history book. It's title and author were unimportant to him, what mattered was its content. He opened it and begun to read the first page. "You don't want to help us with making weapons. I can understand that given the destructive capability your armour possesses. You fear that they'll fall into the wrong hands?"
"Weapons breed violence, violence breeds death and death breeds misery." The history book was terribly dull. The author clearly just wanted to get his thoughts onto paper, be damned if anyone else thought they were good or not.
After a small beat of silence, the man (Josh was certain that his name was Mike. He really should ask to be sure, but that would be terribly embarrassing) asked. "When's our next expedition?"
"In a month's time," Erwin answered.
Another stretch of silence. Josh looked over the other books, trying to find something more appealing to read.
"So...we're thirty days out from an expedition beyond the Walls, with a fresh batch of green rookies along for the ride?" Mike's tone was a dry drawl, almost sarcastic in disbelief. His voice didn't rise above its level tone.
"Assuming any sign-up, yes," Erwin said easily.
Josh continued to play the illusion that he was even remotely interested in the books before him. The tone in which the two men spoke to each other was remarkably casual and at ease, nothing like a soldier and his superior would speak to each other. Did this mean that Erwin and Mike were close, friends from training? Or something else?
Or did this mean that Estevan's constant hate boner for everything soldiers and the like had made his paranoid? Now that was a frighting thought.
"Not to be pessimistic, but isn't that a bit rash? Honestly, those rookies will be torn apart the minute they set foot outside the Walls."
"Our custody of Eren is conditional on the results of this mission," Erwin said smoothly. That little strand of information hit Josh like a stone to the skull. Just like that, he now knew just of fragile Eren's placement was in the Corps. He would tell Estevan the second he could. But— "Right now, our first order of business is persuading the Brass we have him under our control, that he's an asset, not a-
With a snap, Josh closed the book shut. Erwin went quiet and Josh knew, even without looking, that he had his undivided attention. "Eren Yeager is not a thing to be controlled. He's a person, a young man with powers that are his own. Whether or not he uses them for you is his choice, not yours."
"He's a soldier who's given his vow to fight for humanity, under my orders if the need arises." Erwin's voice became as hard and as cold as blue ice. "That means that, actually, his powers can be used for my orders. Should the need arises."
Had this been said to Estevan Martinez, he would have exploded in rage and go on about how only Eren was the master of his own life, that he was entitled to make his own decisions, not Erwin Smith. That all people were entitled to make their own choices, no matter what the situation or the outcome. He would have grabbed Erwin by the neck, daring him to say it again as he brought forth all the wrath of Guyver Yang upon him.
But Joshua Martin wasn't Estevan Martinez.
And whilst Joshua vehemently agreed with some his brother's beliefs, all of which were just points, he was not quick to anger. And any that he did feel was smothered, put away with everything else that ever angered him. With all other strong emotional reactions. Because anger wouldn't win wars or fights, only a person who calmly assesses the situation before them would win.
That is one thing Joshua Martin believed.
That is how he differed from Estevan Martinez.
That is why they were an effective duo.
Putting the book back onto its place on the shelf, he turned to meet the Commander's eyes. "You are an unusual man, Commander Erwin, but not as ambiguous as you may hope to be." The blonde's eyes twitched, a small hint of shock entering them. Josh walked over to the desk until he was standing before Erwin. "Ever since we've been here, you haven't asked the obvious question."
Erwin blinked, looking totally lost. "And what question would that be?"
Josh smiled knowingly. "Can me and my brother, with the Guyver Units, clear the boulder blocking the route from Trost to Shinganshina."
The look of naked shock on Erwin's face, something that looked so out of place on such a stern and unflappable countenance, was rather satisfying. Mike, who had otherwise remained completely neutral throughout their exchange, surprised him by concurring: "He's right. Asking them to make an entrance would be the easiest, clearest course of action. I bet that would be nothing to you, right?"
Mike was looking at him. The question was for him. Josh nodded. "Easily." Making a hole through a boulder would be simple, he reflected. Between the two of them, Josh and Estevan had plenty of energy attacks to spare. The Mega Blasters would be too much, too damaging for the task. Their High-Frequency Blades would be more than up to the task, though would be rather time-consuming. Though to be fair, they had time in abundance.
"Instead, you want us to move from an Eastern district which is not only needlessly time-consuming but also highly dangerous." Mike gave his Commander a dry, knowing look. "All that stuff you said before was just your way of not giving us a straight answer."
Erwin looked at Mike, baffled before he closed his eyes and lowered his head. Then he smirked. "You're sharp." He opened his eyes and looked at Josh approvingly. "Both of you."
"Do not assume that my young age makes me gullible," Josh said, his seventeen-year-old voice dropping an octave. It was a wonder how his breath didn't leave him in a burst of vapour. "I have brought down far more powerful men that you, Commander. Men who had become far more, and less, than human."
"I never had such thoughts in mind," Erwin said, leaning back in his chair. A gleam of interest was in his eyes, clearly about what Josh had said. There was not a hint that suggested that the words had worried him. Not that they were meant to. "In my experience, age isn't a factor when it comes to intelligence."
Josh waved the comment aside like it was an annoying fly. He narrowed his eyes at the man, just under a suspicious glare. "The fact that the old man, Zackly, and the other Military people didn't seem to be fazed at all by your statement to hold custody over us implies that they too think you're up to something. I was shocked that none of them called you out on it. So that leaves me to wonder: What exactly are you aiming for, Commander?"
Erwin's smirk became a smile. Smooth, calm, a little playful even. Cryptically, the blonde said to both he and Mike. "You'll have the facts soon enough."
Josh didn't like that answer. It was vague and confusing and just plain annoying. Was the Commander treating this like a game? He opened his mouth to reply, to try and gauge a proper answer out of him before a faint sound tickled his eardrums. He turned to look at the door, the sound originating from behind.
Erwin noticed. "What's the matter?"
"Did you hear that?" No sooner than when the words left his lips did he hear it again, twice more, far more clearly. Sounds akin to muffled grenades going off. The sounds went off again, now more frequently, one after the other. Josh stretched his senses, feeling the faint vibrations in the cobblestone ground and the distortions of air currents. Suddenly, he knew exactly what that was.
"What is that?" Mike sounded perplexed.
"My brother," Josh said the words through a long-suffering, exasperated sigh. He looked back to the Commander, keeping himself from smiling apologetically. "Thank you for the interesting conversation, Commander. It was...informative." He fully turned away, waving a hand. The door opened. "If you'll excuse me."
Joshua didn't want to wait for a response. He pitched his body forward slightly, barely moving at all, and then he was gone. The office and it occupants were far behind him and he was running, flying past people in a blur of speed that kicked up dust, knocked over cleaning supplies and made women and men alike cry out in surprise and trip over themselves. To Erwin and Mike, it would appear as though he disappeared in a burst of air.
He hoped he wouldn't find his brother doing something stupid.
For a few moments, Erwin could only stare at the empty space where Guyver Yin (or Joshua Martin, he wasn't sure which was preferred) had occupied. The burst of air he had made in his departure hadn't knocked anything over, thankfully, merely causing him to close his eyes for a brief second.
With a sigh he leaned back against his chair, staring up at the ceiling. That had been rather intense if he did say so himself.
When he had told Mike of his plan, his friend had protested. He made just points, questioning if it was wise to share such information with an unknown factor. But Erwin had been adamant about his choice, genuine in his desire to gain the opinions of the Guyvers. He had hoped to have both, but he didn't complain to have just one. Besides, if his brief interactions with the two before their trial were anything to go by, Yin seemed to be the more reasonable of the two.
There had been another reason for his decision: He had hoped to gain perspective of the two brothers.
The major surprise that came with the reveal that the heroes of the people, the Black and White Guardians, were two young men had not been lost to Erwin Smith. As the boys explained themselves, he had been shocked still in a mixture of bafflement and sheer disbelief.
It was almost impossible to believe, that these two boys that one would pass in a street without even noticing them could be the renowned legends that seemingly just fell out of the sky. Young men.
Young, human men.
This opened countless doors and offered endless possibilities.
Men were weak and fallible. Men with power could send hundreds to their deaths without a single gain of guilt. Men with no power, but who strive for it, would jump at any opportunity to obtain it. Erwin knew this, he knew this very well. The question remained:
Could he, a Commander, control them, those Gods among mortal men?
"They're not what you were expecting, right?" Erwin brought himself out of his head enough to answer Mike's question.
"Nothing in life is ever what we expect it to be," Erwin said distantly, already being washed away by the currents of his mind. "But that's hardly important. Whether they agree with us or not, we've still gained invaluable allies."
"He's planning something."
Immediately, Estevan hated how stupidly obvious the fact was as it left his lips. He and Josh were here, holders of two Guyver Units that went far and beyond what any typical Guyver Unit could do, and Eren could turn into a Titan. What else would a man in Erwin Smith's position do? A man in a world where humanities worst enemy were man-eating monsters with technology that could barely hinder them? Plan a way to make them useful, to his ends. Regardless of whatever their few point on the matter was.
"I know," Josh said, looking out the window. He had been staring out for the last thirty seconds. "But there's nothing we can do about it right now. Acting out will only make our already delicate situation more difficult."
"That a lot of people believe that we essentially abandoned them five years ago and that we can't be trusted?"
"Exactly. They'll be looking for an excuse, however small. We can't give them one."
Estevan grunted his understanding, crossing his arms as he leaned against the wall. He fixed his pensive stare on the cobblestones, face etched into an unreadable expression. Behind that stony expression, his mind worked. He tried to imagine if he could last against the constant annoyances that he was sure to face. His imaginings all came to the same conclusion: No. No, he would not.
"We have to be smart about this." Josh's voice was quiet, hiding an undercurrent of steel. He turned his head, one eye staring seriously into Estevan. "This is their world, not ours. We have to abide by their rules, their decisions."
Something lurched in Estevan's chest and fury scalded the back of his throat. "I will not take orders from puppets." He hissed through his teeth.
"I'm not asking you to," Josh looked back out the window, as though Estevan didn't look like he was about to spontaneously combust. It was both incredible and irritating as hell, his little brother's calmness. "I'm saying you must behave yourself. And that, until we understand what's happening to this world, we must be careful."
A thoughtful look melted the stony expression off Estevan's face. "What are you thinking?"
"Oh, I have plenty of theories. On the Titans, that is." Josh half turned his body, facing the wall. Estevan could see that his eyes were closed and there was a tired, wane smile on his lips. He wished it would disappear, be replaced by something more positive. It didn't belong on Josh's face. "Weapons made by humans during a time of war? Scientific experiments/biological weapons of mass destruction? An environmental response to the overpopulation of humanity? A result of disease or genetic mutation, artificially created to control the population? The next stage of human evolution?"
"More like devolution," Estevan muttered, hiding the fact that each possible truth shot a spear of ice through him. They had no idea, no solid proof, and that was terrifying in its own right. "Nothing is scarier." He remembered reading once, in what felt like a lifetime ago. One thing was clear to him and he voiced it to Josh. "I think it's pretty clear-cut that this has something to do with man. After all, we are the architects of our own destruction."
"Not all of us," Josh quickly countered, shooting a sharp look to Estevan from over his shoulder, his voice low but firm. The American smiled ever so slightly. There it was, Josh's unwavering belief in the fundamental goodness of people. Always willing to look at others in a different light, never in just one shade.
Sometimes, Estevan wished he could be like that.
Sometimes.
"But yes, I have to agree." The Brit digressed. He closed his eyes and sighed, keeping them closed as he spoke. "Man-made monsters does seem like the most likely explanation for the Titans. But-"
"Eren."
"Sorry?" Josh gave his brother a questioning look, speaking in that gentlemanly tone that hid how vexed he was at being interrupted.
Estevan only briefly thought on how much he could have cared less about that. "Eren, what does that make him?" He said.
Josh closed his eyes again with a sigh, as though the answer was obvious. He kept them closed as he said. "Not sure yet. Questions for later. Anyway, as I was saying, I find the idea that the Titans could push humanity to the edge of extinction in only a hundred years slightly...odd."
Estevan raised a brow. "How so?"
"If it really took only a century for the Titans to do all this, then there would be more concrete information on how it happened. More to that, how could the survivors possibly create the Walls? With all the settlements and the difference in land space between the Walls, along with the fact the Titans seemed completely unstoppable in their hunt for food, it really should have been impossible for anyone to make the Walls."
"The information could have been destroyed. I mean, between fighting for their lives and reclaiming their lands, keeping maintenance on information would be at the bottom of their list."
"Someone would remember, a person who would have been alive in those early years. They would pass the information on, to their relatives and descendants. Yet no one knows, not a single person. Everyone merely has speculations. I had a look through one of Erwin's history books, complete speculation. He had many books, all by different authors. I bet they all have different ideas." Josh was glaring at the wall before him, as though it had all the answers and was keeping it from him. Or perhaps he was fuming at the idea of all that paper wasted on useless ideas? Who knew?
Estevan leaned his head back, brows furrowed in thought. The American wasn't stupid, he would sooner tear the tongue out of anyone who claimed him to be. But between the two of them, Joshua was more of the thinker than he was. Josh was the one to look deeper, dissect the situation before them and suggest the best possible plan of action. One that didn't get thousands of people killed.
Estevan, in contrast, had a simple mindset: Protect friends and loved one with his life. Eradicate any and all who threatened them.
But still, Estevan thought. He would offer his opinions to Josh, however brash or foolish they may sound to him and hoped that they would help him. His younger brother had an almost disturbing knack for working things out well in advance.
He worked over what they knew and what they had discussed:
The Titans.
The Walls
Lack of knowledge.
Divided land.
Uneven military.
Royalty.
It struck Estevan like lighting. So sudden and so unbelievable that he himself was certain that Josh would scoff and toss it aside. But it made so much sense, worked so well, how could it not be the truth?
Taking a breath and swallowing the rocks in his throat, he hesitantly put forth. "They could have been killed."
A small pause.
"Explain that." He could feel Josh's eyes on him, burning into the side of his face, but he dared not meet his gaze.
"A person in power, of royalty or high up in the military, could have had those people killed. If they wanted to erase that information, keep it from becoming general knowledge. Then the killers are sworn to silence or are silenced, so no loose ends remain."
The words hung in the air and Estevan waited for them to be discarded. The only things that could be heard were the distant talk of soldiers and of construction farther off. But then he heard Josh gasp, quietly and in disbelief, and he turned to see his little brother's face curled in shock. He wasn't looking at him though, his eyes were far away and drowning in thought. He knew that look well. "My God, you're right." He then turned away, left hand rising to cover his mouth. The troubled look that took his face made Estevan tense and move off the Wall, ready to spring into action if he had to. "Who else could destroy such information? But why? To stay in power? To keep the world as it is? I don't-"
He broke off, falling silence under the weight of their subject matter. Estevan watched as Josh's shoulder rose and fell with deep, calming breaths. That wasn't a good sign, he felt his own heart constrict with uneasiness. "What are you thinking?" Unlike before when he had said those words, playful and curious, this time they were said with grim anticipation for the undoubtedly dour answer.
"I'm thinking," Josh muttered tightly, through his hand, an ominous ring with each slightly muffled word. "That there is far more at work in this world that appearances would have us believe. And that we must look for answers."
Estevan had nothing to say in response to that, his lips pressed into a tight, thin line as his gaze lowered to the floor. All he could think about was how the hell Josh expected them to find out anything. The silence that blanketed them was heavy, the young scarred man could feel it weighing on his shoulders like lead weights.
His gaze returned to the Brit's back when he next spoke. "It's amazing, really. That despite all this, despite the sheer bleakness of their situation, the Survey Corps continue to fight against the Titans. No matter how many of them die. They just get up, and try again."
The grimace returned. "You sound like you respect them..."
The sharp look returned, thrown over a shoulder. "I respect anyone who continues to fight against impossible odds, against overwhelming despite and death. Look me in the eyes and tell me you don't feel even a smidgen of respect for them."
It was a dare and neither of the brothers would back down before the other. Joshua's eyes were a natural brown, like dirt, so unlike the reddish brown of Estevan's maroon eyes that reflected the light in pinpoints of crimson red. Estevan eventually lost the dare, averting his eyes to the wall on his right with a vexed expression. Words left his lips. "I won't try to like them, or be nice to them."
Of course he respected them. Just as Josh said, anyone who could fight against the seeming impossible deserved respect. He just wished that they weren't soldiers, all of them. That way, he might of-
"I already told you, I'm not asking you to. I'm merely saying that we can't expect them to act like anyone back home. The people of this world have seen too much, lost too much." The younger male allowed that hung in the air before he clapped his hands together and turned fully to face his brother. "Now, that aside," Like a switch had been flipped, Josh's formal tone became jovial. "I spied some bed sheets outside, which I am assuming belongs to the bed?"
Estevan pointedly refused to look at Josh and the damn smile that he knew was on his lips. He felt his face go warm.
A soft, amused scoff left the Brit. "I thought so. C'mon." Josh made his way to the door, looking as though nothing could bring him down. "Let's get them back here before the Captain notices. I doubt you want him up in your face about it."
Estevan snorted. "That Hobbit would need a chair to do that." The American grinned as Josh released a peal of laughter. When he thought about it, it had been a long while since he last heard his brother laugh. He allowed himself to feel pride in bringing it back.
He followed the sniggering boy out of the room, leaving the discussion and its ultimate conclusion to be put on the back burner for the time being.
The answers would come, Estevan told himself. They would come.
Together, side by side, they walked.
The night was mostly silent, save for the sounds of incests.
The air was cold and fresh.
No, fresh was too simple.
Taking a lungful of the night air through his nose that then left in a calm exhale, Josh's senses could detect none of the air pollution that their world was inflicted with. It only served to confirm that which Josh had voiced aloud the moment he had seen the landscape from atop of Wall Maria, that day that was five years ago for everyone else but only four days for himself and Estevan.
"Beautiful," He had said, words distorted by the Guyver. And how true those words were.
This world, for all the death it had suffered, was pure. Clean from the sickness mankind caused.
Beside him, Estevan was quiet. He was not like his younger brother, the Brit reflected, who could sum himself up in one word: taciturn. There was an ugly, annoying elephant in the room that's presence was growing more and more unbearable by the second. The more Josh tried to ignore it, tried to put it out of his mind, the louder it would bellow for attention. With his rising fatigue, Josh found his usual impeccable patience beginning to wane.
Were they normal humans, Joshua was certain that they would be suffering from symptoms of sleep depravity and the like. But the Guyvers kept them awake, pumping their bodies with a kind of stimuli that kept their brains fully energized and their bodies free from stress. This had helped tremendously for the past few days, even the three days they spent in the prison whilst waiting for their trial. Now though, after spending a full day without using their armour, the fatigue was creeping up on them and Estevan was yawning every few minutes. Josh smothered his own into his hands.
He was looking forward to a nice cool bed. He had no plan for getting up early. He hoped to sleep at least eight hours, more if he was lucky. The odds were in his favour, he'd like to think, for when it came to sleeping in late there was no one better (save his brother after a long, productive day of crime-fighting).
After helping his brother fix the bed he had unintentionally throw out the window, Joshua had pulled Estevan aside and had brought him along to Erwin's office. They, or rather Josh, had discussed where exactly they were going to sleep. Josh had, politely, asked for a room with two beds. Neither brother found it awkward to share a room, they had done so before and it just made so many different things easier. Erwin had agreed and had personally led them to a room on the third level of the castle. People stopped to stare and whisper, Josh paid them no mind. Estevan seemed keen to make himself as frightening as possible as he glowered or growled at anyone whose eyes lingered too long on them.
It was a decent room, Josh thought. Nothing to gloat about. Two beds on either side of the room with a desk between them, before a window. Enough space for both of them to move around without feeling confined, a bookshelf filled with both that Josh knew were going to be as boring as death and a wardrobe filled with new clothes (a pair of soldiers were in the process of filling it with clothes before Erwin opened the door). Josh had some slight reservations about the clothes but he kept the thought to himself.
Josh had thanked the Commander, saying the room was brilliant. Estevan had grunted and muttered that it would do. Erwin had smiled, a polite, friendly thing, and left them to enjoy it. Both boys had given the room a brief look over while the soldiers, a young man and a mousy looking woman, waited with bated breath. They both, silently, concluded that the room was a room. Estevan left in a hurry and Josh, once he finally took notice of the soldiers, muttered a hurried 'carry on' before making his escape.
The moon hung in the night sky, large and luminous, and Josh could only think about how comfortable those pillows had looked-
"We can't go back, can we?"
"Bollocks."
Well, there went the comfortable silence.
Josh looked as Estevan tiredly, heart clenching as he noticed his brother's eyes were filled with a resigned, yet utterly profound sadness that did not belong in those maroon eyes. Swallowing back the sudden, stifling stuffiness that clogged his throat all the way down to his stomach, Josh nodded stiffly. "No." He croaked, looking back in front of him. It was easier to talk about their situation without having to look his brother in the eye and say no, they couldn't go back home. "I've thought about what happened at every possible angle, thought of every possible way we could counter, and all my conclusions are the same:
"We can't replicate that kind of power. It's a kind of power I didn't think they could possibly possess."
"The power to open doorways between words, to parallel universes...yeah, that is a pretty fuckin' crazy power." Estevan exhaled a hash, shaky bark of pained laughter. "Fuck, shit. They think we're dead, don't they? They have to. Tetsurō, Mizuki, Yohei, Shizu..." Josh pressed his lips into a thin line, trying to keep his face a blank canvas as the emotions boiled scathingly in his chest. "Fuck, Josh, our friends probably think we're dead. That we died fighting him and-"
"Estevan." The numb word left Josh's numb lips and flopped to the ground like a dead fish. It had an effect on his brother. The younger brother watched as the older brother went as still as a stone statue, inhaling sharply. He seemed to remember that yes, his brother was right beside him. As always. With a harsh curse, Estevan turned away, angrily scrubbing his eyes. After a painful moment that seemed to stretch into an eternity of agony, Estevan inhaled sharply and begun moving again.
"I'm fine," He growled, sounding as livid as his face suggested. "I'm fine, everything's fine."
"Lair," Josh wanted to spit, the word like acid on his tongue, glaring at his brother's back as he followed him. Now they no longer walked side by side, instead, the Brit lagged a few steps behind the American. Despite Josh's natural response to comfort and help his brother, to rid him of his pain, he knew it wouldn't be appreciated. Something like fire was burning behind Josh's eyes and his gaze was blurring. He clenched his teeth so hard they could have shattered rocks, nails digging into the palm of his hands.
"Stop it. Stop it! Now is not the time. Calm down. Breath and stop being such a damn-"
"OW!"
"FUCK!"
Josh hadn't realised that he had stopped moving. He did though, hear what sounded like a woman cry out in pain and his brother swear passionately. Immediately, pain being shoved into that place where he would deal with it later, the Brit broke into a jog and arrived at the scene. Cradling his face and muttering curses over and over, Estevan looked as though he had run into a brick wall.
Lord, please don't let it be that he walked into the bloody door.
That was not the case, thankfully. For on the ground in the doorway was a withering woman covering her face with her hands.
Instantly, Josh lurched to her side. "I'm so sorry, are you alright?" He had a hand stretched out, ready to offer her help if she needed it. He then took notice of the flaming torch beside her, a beacon of light in the otherwise dark night, and quickly took it in his other hand via a use of his telekinesis.
A sudden change came over the woman.
She became utterly still, as though she were a recording put on pause. And then she shot up to a seating position and Josh flinched. An overwhelming sense of dread shot through him as he met an intense pair of wide, carmine eyes. And then, replacing the frightful glare, came a look of pure elation that was no less off-putting. He recognized the face and her name instantly sprung to the forefront his mind.
The Survey Corps Squad Leader, Hanji Zoe.
"Guyver Yin! Good evening!" And then she was grabbing both his hands with her own (he positioned the torch so her hair wouldn't catch alight) and shoved her face so close to his own that Josh had the urge to alter his biochemistry and stretch his head far from his neck. Something in the back of his skull told him that wouldn't have been a smart move. "Ah, I see your human form is just like everyone else. Shame honestly. I was hoping for glowing skin or eyes, something Godly, y'know? But beggars can't be choosers!"
Joshua should have told her not to call him Guyver Yin whilst he was outside the armour, make a point that Yin was just a cover for when he was fighting back in his world, but he was more focused on trying not to pass out from the heat that burned all over his face. It had nothing to do with the fact that the face of a rather attractive woman was perhaps inches away from his own. No, certainly not.
"God, how are you standing?" Estevan's miffed voice drifted from somewhere to his left. Josh found himself in an intense staring contest with Hanji, who almost looked as though she were scanning every part of his skin. Not once did she blink. Subconsciously, he found himself looking over her own features. Her carmine eyes, maroon hair much like Estevan's tied up in an unkempt high ponytail with bangs parted down the middle. It was oily and unclean, telling Josh that she hardly (if ever) washed it. She didn't smell, thankfully.
At the sound of his voice, her gaze snapped over to him so sharply Josh would have expected her neck to break. The subtle vibrations in the air told Josh that Estevan was now standing and had flinched while his eyes lingered on her neck and years of tutoring from his parents kept his eyes there and only there. "Guyver Yang!" Promptly yanking the torch out his hands without a word, leaving him to be engulfed by the shadows, the woman was now in Estevan's face. Who, Josh noted with amusement as the heat receded from his face, looked quite lost at the present moment.
"Your eyes glow," Hanji observed, moving the torch side to side before the still Estevan. With his eyes wide open, it was impossible for the Squad Leader to miss how Estevan's eyes reflected the light of the torch as crimson red blurs. "Well, kinda," She really did sound disappointed. What was she expecting, for them to vomit rainbows and urinate fire?
"That's just what they do," The Amercian uttered tightly, awkwardly. He was clearly just as uncomfortable as his younger brother had been a moment ago.
Josh decided then to save his brother. And Hanji, before she pushed the wrong button. "I'm quite amazed you have so much energy, considering you must have spent most of the day experimenting." He remarked. He had overheard and been a little bit more than baffled when he heard that Hanji was experimenting on two Titans that had been captured in Trost. He had gone to the centre of the Castle to see for himself, only to promptly decided against the notion when he heard what could almost be passed as the sound of banshees mating.
"Sleep is for the weak!" Hanji proclaimed dramatically, whirling to face to Josh so quickly that the young man had to fight the natural response to step back in fright, the flaming torch whooshing audibly as she did so. Behind her, Estevan heaved a sigh of relief. "Who could sleep when a mountain of information, the potential answers to a million unanswered questions, lay at your fingertips?!"
Profound? Quite. Weird? Absolutely.
Hanji's whole body seemed to defeat with her sad sigh. "And while I'd love to stay and pick your brains," Josh twitched at the mental image that sentence gave him, the sudden hungry gleam in the woman's eyes as she stared at him not helping at all. "I need to see Eren! I've got so much to talk to him about! Do you know where he's at?"
Josh shared a glance with Estevan, both knowing that the other was thinking the same thing: Should they or should they not be concerned for Eren now that they knew Hanji Zoe was looking for him like a hunter would meat? The Brit decided he didn't want his brain to be removed. "Inside the castle, I would think." He answered, voice almost a choke.
"Thanks! Here I come, Eren, ready or not!" Hanji hollered joyously, so loudly it was bound to wake anyone who had decided to go to bed early, and with that, she ran off.
Josh and Estevan remained by the open doorway, blanketed in moonlit darkness. Neither of them found the words to speak for a long moment. It was Estevan, once again, who broke the silence as he turned to look at Josh. Lite by the moonlight, the older brother's dumbfounded expression was visible to the Brit. He idly noticed his maroon eyes reflecting the white light in red pinpoints. "Should we-"
Josh held up a hand, halting his brother's verbal bafflement, and uttered in exasperation, "No. No, we should not." As he walked through the doorway, followed by Estevan after a moment's pause, the White Guardian sent a silent thank you to Hanji.
Her intervention managed to help them forget the pain, if only for a little while.
She also reminded him that, when he had the chance, he had to talk with Eren.
The Next Day
Eren Yeager was tired.
No, that was too small a word.
Was there a greater word than exhausted? If so, that would explain his current state beautifully.
It hadn't seemed like a bad idea at the time, he reflected. To speak with Hanji Zoe.
It had been late into the evening and dressed in nightwear, as opposed to the others who all wore their uniforms, Eren had been hoping to just conclude the meeting and go to bed. He hadn't been looking forward to it, really. He had been shown his sleeping quarters when he had finished a task set by Levi and the Captain had led him to the basement so he knew where to go. Needless to say, Eren had not been enthralled by what he saw. But that had been preferable to what he had been going through before the Squad Leader made her entrance.
So far, Levi's Squad (minus the Captain himself, who seemed to be intent on being as completely unlikeable and unapproachable as possible) had been affable towards Eren. Petra was nice enough, while the others treated him as one would expect them to treat a green behind the ears rookie. However, that didn't stop them from watching him out of the corners of their eyes. Didn't stop them from the occasional twitch when he turned to face them or appeared before them unexpected. Didn't stop the subtle distrust that didn't go past Eren notice.
And how could Eren not uncomfortable when the whole lot of them set their mixed gazes upon him?
He had Eld to thank for that, voicing the sheer disbelief of humanity's hope coming in a way none expected. Even Levi had stopped sipping his tea to look at him. They all shared one quality: They were looking at him as though he were about to turn into a Titan.
To say he had been uncomfortable would have been an understatement. The pause hammered home a critical fact that Eren had briefly put out of his mind: These people were going to kill him if he acted out of line. Hell, Levi would probably kill him for even fewer reasons. He couldn't look any of them in the eye.
Why did they have to look at him as though he was the enemy, as though he had all the answers for the Titans? It briefly made him wonder how they looked/thought of the Guyvers. How could they looked at him and think he was humanity's hope?
What did that make the Guyvers?
Then Levi had dryly quipped about Eren's impending doom at the hands of a certain 'you-know-who.'
Eren wasn't sure what had frightened him the most, the sudden humour Levi expressed or the implications.
Hanji Zoe's was, at the time, a breath of fresh air in a room that was stifling with unease. Unlike the others, Hanji Zoe didn't look at him with poorly hidden fear. She looked at him just like she would look at anyone else, if with a touch of keen interest. She approached him without fear and even reached out to touch him, the first bit of pleasant human contact he had since he had shaken Commander Erwin's hand after the trail.
The Squad Leader said she wanted his help and though slightly taken aback by her mannerisms and her rather off-putting intensity for 'discovery', Eren found himself curious. Mother had always told him to be polite to women, so Eren decided that he would hear what she had to say. And even then, if he had refused, she was a higher rank him. Best not to piss off his superiors.
Levi and his Squad promptly took a hasty retreat when the maroon-haired woman gleefully claimed that she had found a listener. Oluo had taken a moment to snark, "Remember that no means no, Hanji!", before Petra shoved him out the door.
Once alone, Eren was given the full picture of Hanji Zoe.
And to say she didn't baffle him would have been a lie as huge as the Colossal Titan.
She was, in a single word, strange. Hanji looked at Titans and didn't draw back in fear. Instead, she was drawn towards them. She spoke about her experiments with two Titans she had captured in Trost, who she had actually named, with delight and fondness. Eren had been more confused than disgusted, it was hard to find anger in someone who spoke so earnestly about what they enjoyed doing, ultimately asking Hanji how she could treat the monsters that had put them to the brink of extinction like hamsters.
Then Hanji told him how.
And when she did, Eren realized that there was an uncanny similarity between the two of them. She told him of how she lost people she loved, how she once fought the Titans out of pure hatred. Eren found himself sympathising. But then Hanji revealed how her perceptive changed: She learned that Titans weighted less than their mass would make one think. She then applied this to his ability to transform and suddenly he was breathless.
Hanji Zoe might be able to find the truth about his ability to transform.
Perhaps even on the origins of the Titans.
She told him that she believed that there was a firm difference between what they saw and what was the truth and that now it was time for a new viewpoint. One that was based on fear and contempt. She surprised him even more by telling him that maybe she was wasting her time, that maybe her work would all be for nothing. And her response to that?
"Nothing ventured, nothing gained."
And then Eren understood something.
No, that wasn't right. It was more like he remembered something.
Ever since had joined them, time at the Corps had been one surprise after another. The Guyvers being humans aside, the castle felt less like an HQ and more like a haven for crackpots. And yet, their eccentricities aside, they all desire the same thing: Change.
They all wanted to push humanity past it's faze of terror and into something new.
Eren remembered the reason why he wanted to join the Survey Corps.
And it was in that moment of realisation that Eren found himself wanting to know everything. So eagerly, blood boiling in his veins, he asked Hanji Zoe for her to go into greater detail about her experiments. What the hell, sleep could wait. And besides, Hanji looked quite touched by his recommendation. Made him wonder if her attitude made her a bit of an outcast by her fellows. Yet another thing they had in common.
More and more, Eren found himself feeling a sort of kinship with the rather strange woman.
But as minutes turned into hours, Eren soon realised that strange was too small a word for Hanji Zoe.
He had thought that he'd learn something new, and while he did, Hanji spent quite a large portion of those hours going over stuff he had learned in basic training (or what Armin told him after). And she just would—
not—
stop.
Eren regretted not following the others example when he had the chance and was a little bit pissed off that they hadn't given him a heads up. Was this another thing rookies were meant to deal with? Either way, as it currently stood, he was quite sure that he was going to die from exhaustion. Anything Hanji asked him was met with a dazed, automatic response. He didn't really hear what she was asking, or saying, anymore.
Hanji didn't seem to notice. Hell, she was no worse for the wear from when she started. As if talking for long hours without end was a normal thing. Something told Eren that it probably was for her.
It was only the resounding crashing of the door opening that shot Eren back into awareness, whilst also making him nearly leap out of his skin. After a flurry of words left a panicked soldier that didn't reach his brain, Eren found his hand being grabbed in a vice grip by Hanji and was dragged outside the room. Only the look on Hanji's face, a look he had seen on his mother's face quite a bit four years ago, made Eren genuinely try to shake off his fatigue as he tried to keep up with her.
They arrived at the centre of the castle in no time, already swamped by soldiers, and Hanji released Eren who was greeted by Levi to shove her way through the others as she cried out in horror. But it was clear to any newcomer what had happened. The great streams to steam that rose in the air like silver fire was a clear giveaway.
Hanji's Titans, Sawney and Beane, were dead.
And then Hanji started screaming.
Eren felt a powerful mix of pure bafflement and gut-clenching pity. Hanji had fallen to her knees, clutching her head as though it were about in explode, and was wailing and wailing in what could only be conceived as pure agony. Even with the distance between them and the numerous people around them, Eren could see the tears streaming down her face as clear as day.
And the sun.
Damn, it was bright. He really wished Hanji would have allowed him to grab his cloak, its hood would have protected his sore eyes from the light. That, and to cover his night clothes. He felt oddly naked just standing around in them whilst everyone else was in uniform.
Looking over his left shoulder, he saw that Captain Levi's face was no different than it usually was saved for the slight grimace on his lips. Not for the first time, the boy wondered if the man's face was permanently fixed on that expression. He quickly looked away, lest the short man noticed him.
"This a soldier's work?" Eren perked at the sound of Gunther's voice, looking forward and spotting him and Eld near each other. He managed to hear them, over the mutterings of all the other soldiers present, even as Hanji continued to abuse her lungs.
"Yeah, but we haven't got any idea who's responsible," Eld responded, sounding peeved. "Apparently, they were both killed at the same time, before dawn. The guards said that whoever did this got away via 3DM Gear."
"Then the question remains whether or not this was premeditated with two or more people," Gunther concluded and their discussion ended there.
"SAWNEY! BEANE!" Screeched Hanji, her agony seemingly without end.
"Ho boy, looks like someone's finally gone stark raving mad." The amused, condescending drawl of Oluo Bozado rang in Eren's ears and he turned in the direction of his voice just in time to see Petra elbow him hard in the side. "MAH RIBCAGE!"
"I know they were Titans, but you can't deny that they were important test subjects. Seriously, what kind of moron would waste an opportunity like this?" A male soldier grumbled.
"If they weren't morons, then why do this at all?" Another inquired.
"That's pretty damn obvious," Eren thought, feeling a flash of irritation at how anyone could not tell why someone would want to kill two Titans. Their scientific value aside, there was no telling how many people those two had killed during Trost. More than likely, some enraged fellow had killed them for revenge.
Eren flinched when Levi tabbed his arm with the back of his hand, bring him back to the world. "Let's go. This is a matter we leave to the Military Police." The Captain didn't wait for a response, he was already on the move. Eren wasn't sure if it was his sleep-deprived mind or not, but he was rather certain that he heard the man grumbled something about it being too early in the day for this kind of B.S.
For once, Eren found himself in agreement.
But just as he turned to leave, a familiar deep voice said his name. "Eren."
Not even the presence of Commander Erwin could completely shake away Eren's fatigue. He didn't salute him, not that Erwin or Levi commented on that. "Sir," The words left Eren without any actual thought. "What happened here?"
Erwin's response?
He clasped his hands on Eren's shoulders and move Eren so he was facing the dissolving remains of the Titans. He leaned in close, to the point where it was informal for a Commander to do so with a cadet, and uttered near Eren's ear in a sotto voice. "What is it you think you see? Who do you think the real enemy is here?"
Eren just looked at his Commander as though he had grown a second head.
When he said nothing, Erwin sighed and Eren was awake enough to hear what sounded like disappointment in the man's exhale. "Ignore me, loaded question." And with the baffling apology, he left with Levi in tow.
Eren watched them go, eyes wide and disbelieving, feeling the morning breeze flow over him as Hanji continued wailing behind him. "This is the place where I always wanted to be," He looked back over his soldier. A man with dusty blonde hair, the same one who had reported to them that the Titans had been killed, was trying to calm Hanji down. Trying being the keyword. "These are the people I admired ever since I was small."
If anyone had been paying attention to him, they would have seen the strained, crooked grin spread over Eren's lips before he buried his face into his hands. He had the very sudden and very disturbing urge to laugh out loud. "And they're all complete fucking lunatics."
Petra Ral made a habit of looking at each new day with a positive light.
She washed, got her uniform on, and told herself that today would be a good day.
And, more often than not, it worked.
The fact that they were currently stationed at the castle felt like a little holiday to Petra, a time to relax a bit and not constantly worry about whether or not she or someone she cared about was going to die the next day. And so far, having been tasked with the duty to keep an eye on Eren Yeager was not ruining any of her days.
Today, it seemed, was going to be a different day all together. She pointedly ignored the looks she felt being sent her way, at both her and her guest across the table.
"Both the test subjects were killed?"
"Yes," Petra said. "It was done by a soldier, that much is clear, but their reason for it is still up in the air."
Guyver Yin, or Joshua Martin as he was apparently called, said nothing as he took a large bite out of his red apple. The way he looked down at the table as chewed slowly, thoughtfully, told her that the gears in his head were rolling.
It came as quite the surprise to Petra when she had come across the young boy as she made her way to the dining hall after members of the Military Police arrived to assess the situation with Hanji's Titans. He had greeted her with a polite greeting that she returned and had made her laugh when he dryly told her of the whereabouts of his brother when she asked. "If you go back to our room, you'll find he's currently doing a rather spectacular imitation of a box of rocks." Once he stated that he was off to get some breakfast, Petra had offered to accompany him to which he accepted. She had led him to the pantry, where he had gotten two apples and she had gotten a bowl of warm soup, and they then made their way to the dining hall. As she had expected, the rest of her Squad (minus their Captain) was already there, tucking into their late breakfasts.
To say that the incident with Hanji's Titans hadn't messed up everyone's morning ritual would be a lie.
There was a small number of soldiers eating, the rest more than likely either getting some more sleep or getting to work with their daily tasks. They, as well as her Squad, all stopped what they were doing to stare at the young man beside her. Without a word or a visible acknowledgement of the people eyeing him like a piece of meat, Yin had moved away from Petra and sat at an empty bench table. The sight struck Petra with a sense of melancholy. Yin knew he was being watched, knew that his presence was making the others uncomfortable, and had simply chosen to seclude himself away from them.
No arrogance, no complaint, not a word. He simply did the thing that benefited everyone.
Then, flooded with sympathy, she walked over and sat opposite him.
There was no reason for Petra to do this, nor had she or (to her knowledge) any others of her squad gotten any orders from Captain Levi or Commander Erwin to keep an eye of the Guardians. The most they had gotten was a brief warning by Levi to be wary of them, that they were not to be taken lightly despite their appearances. Dear old Oluo had chosen to voice the shared thought that she knew they all been thinking: That went without saying.
Petra offered to keep him company because, Hero of legend or not, everybody could do with some company. She wondered briefly if he was ever without his older brother. People would talk and Oluo would make jokes till the cows come home. Well, she thought, let them.
They had made small talk, mainly consisting of her asking him how castle life was treating him. One thing led to another and eventually the question of why everyone was either late having breakfast or not present came up. Petra told him.
"Hanji."
"Pardon?"
He gave her an inquisitive look. "Where was Hanji during all this? I know she went to speak with Eren, but I expected her to-"
"Hanji was with Eren. All night. Explaining her work to him." Petra giggled at the look on the boy's face.
"...Is that why Eren looks like a dead man walking?"
"Hanji has an endless supply of energy." Something about that line made Petra feel old. She summed it up to the fact that she was now more than familiar with the eccentric older woman.
"The problem with revenge..." He spoke so suddenly, yet so lowly, that Petra jumped slightly in her seat. "Is that it never evens the score. It ties both the injured and the injurer to an escalator of pain. Both are stuck on the escalator as long as parity is demanded, and the escalator never stops." He was looking to the side, eyes distant with some kind of recollection.
Petra blinked, taken aback by the rather profound words. When he noticed, Yin offered her a sheepish smile. "Sorry, that's a quote from someone back in my world. It rings true though, the fruitlessness of revenge."
"You think that's the reason this person killed the Titans?"
"It's the most likely reason, and the most logical."
Petra mulled over that, seeing the truth in the words. Yes, she realised, he was right. After Trost, who knew how many people were sickened at the idea that two of the monsters that had eaten their comrades were being kept alive. Petra understood that. She herself had felt needless hate for Titans that had killed the comrades, only to waddle off somewhere to kill another. Levi had stopped her from flying off into a mindless rage, and once they had returned to the Walls he had pulled her aside to tell her in his usually crass way: "Don't get your panties in a twist over mindless animals. The Titans have as much sense as a housebroken mutt. You can't make them stop shitting everywhere. You either deal with it or put them down."
Harsh? Yes. True? Undeniably. Brash? As ever.
They probably had wished that they could have done more, whoever had killed the Titans, make them suffer more. Petra took solace in the fact that they had been in Hanji Zoe's hands. A fate, Moblit Berner often bemoaned, worse than death.
But how did that explain Commander Erwin's questions?
"The Commander's been asking questions?"
Eyes snapped to the boy, Petra realised with a gut sinking sense of horror that she had unintentionally voiced the thought. He eyed her intensely, "What exactly did he ask you?" She didn't miss the slight emphasis on his words.
Petra Ral found herself at a crossroad. To tell the Guardian what the Commander had asked her would mean telling him something that might not have meant to be run past him. Erwin hadn't said anything against telling either Guyver. In fact, the Commander had barely made any fuss at all on them. Captain Levi's warning was all she had to go on. Spending this late breakfast had been, in its own way, her proper meeting with the White Guardian.
And her thoughts?
She found him to be a quiet, courteous young man that had treated her with no hint of haughtiness or contempt. He treated her equally, like a human being, regardless of the vast difference between them. Nothing at all like all the legends had bumped him up to be.
That did not mean that she had her guard down, that she did not watch him carefully. That her fingers subconsciously curled to reach for blades she didn't have on her person every time he did look at her.
But, as she thought it over logically and long termed, there was nothing he could gain from this information. So she told him. "He asked me 'Who do you think the enemy is?' I think he's been asking others this as well, but I wouldn't take my word for it."
He stared at her for a full moment, not blinking, before looking away with the slightest of grimaces as he took another bite from his apple. Petra watched, trying to discern any nameable emotions from his face. She found none. He finished his apple in mighty chomps, picked up the core of his first one, and stood up. He bowed, uttering. "Thank you for keeping me company, Miss Ral."
Petra flushed slightly. There was no need for him to do that, though she appreciated the gesture. "It's fine. And call me Petra, please. 'Miss' makes me sound old."
A brief look of surprise came over his face before it was smothered away, replaced by that blank expression that was neither normal or unnerving as he nodded. It fell somewhere in the middle, neutral. It almost reminded her of Captain Levi's face, really.
Speak of the devil, she then thought, for when the boy moved to the entrance he almost smacked into the aforementioned Captain.
The world seemed to go still as Humanity's Strongest Fighter and the White Guardian regarded each other silently. While Yin wasn't exactly towering in height, the Captain's unremarkable height gave him at an unfortunate disadvantage between the two as he looked up slightly to regard the boy. If she had to guess, Yin was a handful of inches taller. Both wore an expression that gave away nothing, though Levi's eyes did glitter with more than a hint of mistrust. Petra half rose from her seat, the others of her Squad following suit.
Should a fight break out, no matter how unlikely that would be, she and the others would be at the Captain's side instantly.
"I hope you made your own fucking bed," Captain Levi broke the silence, his low voice almost deafening in the silence that had enveloped the dining hall.
The voice in which Yin replied in returned was bright and full of life. "I'm afraid not, Captain. I left that to the maid. Also, if it's not a bother..." Petra gasped as, without warning, he took her Captain's left wrist in his right hand, turned the hand skywards and dumped the apple cores into his palm. Levi went very still. Petra heard Oluo make some kind of choking noise behind her. The boy released the frozen Captain's wrist, speaking in a voice that implied he was smiling, "Would you please take care of those for me too? I'm afraid I find myself in short of knowing where the nearest bin is. Thank you very much!" And with that joyous farewell, he walked around the Captain and left.
Levi's face, now clearly seen, was very vacant and very cold. He looked around the dining hall and said flatly, his voice carrying to the other end of the room, "What the fuck are you all gawking at?"
Everyone returned to their breakfast and Petra quickly closed her loose jaw. She felt a gut coiling sense of dread as the Captain strolled over to her now deserted table. Months of training under Instructor Shadis, as well as a hefty knowledge of how the short man acted when upset, strung into action and she quickly saluted him. "Captain Levi, Sir! Good morning!"
"At ease," Levi waved her salute aside and Petra felt relieved. Good, he wasn't mad at her. She met his intense stare easily after he placed the apple cores on the table. "Is there a particularly good reason you were sharing this table with that arrogant little shit stain?"
Petra flushed, eyes falling to the apple cores and then back to Levi's dull blue eyes, hating how her mind immediately made the comparison between Levi and a jealous lover. "I met with him after the incident with the test subjects, Sir. I was just keeping him company and bringing him up to speed. He and his brother slept through the whole thing, Sir."
Levi nodded, seemingly pleased with the answer, and then looked over to the boys. He gestured them over and Petra made space for Oluo as he took the space beside her. Levi remained standing, moving to the end of the table so he could face all of them. Petra idly noticed how no one commented on this. Of course. Any self-respecting member of the Survey Corps with a few years under their belt knew that, when Captain Levi was talking to someone who wasn't them, they'd best keep their heads down and be as small and as invisible as possible.
The Captain flung his cool gaze over them. "I know I've already burden you lot with keeping an eye on Yeager, to say nothing of what you'll have to do if worse comes to worse, but I want you to come to me immediately if any of you spot one of those two do anything...untoward. " The slight pause told them all the Captain needed to think of a good word to describe a situation that could warrant Levi's attention.
"I'll deal with them if it comes to that." None of them dared questioned how Levi planned to do that. The man had a great talent for surprising them, even after all this time.
They complied, of course, and once the Captain left (taking with cores with him, they all noticed) and Oluo started spouting his usual haughty nonsense in a Levi-like way that should have annoyed her, Petra became silent.
Being a soldier for humanity wasn't easy.
Anyone with eyes would be able to see how difficult it was for them to go and fight Titans, to see the haunted look on each of their faces as they returned with less than they had left with, to see them break and fall once they were alone. But the one thing they didn't know, could never understand, was all the difficult choices they had to make. Leaving behind comrade for the sake of a mission if they had been grasped by a Titan, even if there was a chance to save them. Choosing to abandon those who were MIA, even if they were someone dear to them who could appear when they least expected.
Petra Ral knew this all too well.
And Petra was now given a new set of difficult choices. Strike down three young men, one who was still just a child, for the sake of humanity or let them live and possibly condemning the human race for the sake of keeping her own soul clean. Snuff out three lives who, so far, seemed to want to do nothing but help humanity.
But because she is Petra Ral, member of Levi's Squad, she takes these orders without complaint.
Because she is Petra Ral, a soldier of humanity, the choice is no choice at all.
Because in the end, Petra Ral knows that no one can be a good soldier if they were unwilling to get their hands dirty. Captain Levi knew this, so did Commander Erwin. Anyone who is anyone should know that only those who strive can achieve what they want.
And because she is a loyal soldier who would follow the orders given to her in a heartbeat, because there is no choice between humanity's survival and destruction, because she would do anything for her Captain, Petra Ral swore on her honour that she will do all that she can when the moment arrives.
Erwin Smith was, with no hint of arrogance, very good at hiding what he was feeling.
He had learned early on in life that, if he were to express what he was feeling, others would find ways to pick at him and break him down.
As such, he hid his utter boredom very well under a mask of well-crafted professionalism.
Captain Rockbell of the Military Police struck him no differently than most others as he went over what he and his small number of men had found in their (and he used this word lightly) investigation. With his shaggy red beard, the bags under his eyes and the hard to miss stench of alcohol and smoke, he looked like a man who would want to be anywhere but here. He would, in Erwin opinion, look right at home in some prostitutes arms in some dirty bar. A perfect example of a member of the Military Police.
The laziness of the Military Police was the ultimate enemy of the Survey Corps. Why risk one's life when they could scurry away to the safety of the interior?
In his petty moments, Erwin wishes he had the power to disband and destroy them. They were cowardly wastes of space, every last one of them, utterly unworthy of their ranks. But then those moments pass and any feelings towards them are locked away behind the mask.
There's no point fighting a lost cause, he would tell himself.
A knock at the door stopped Rockbell and both men turned their eyes to the entrance of his office. "Enter."
The door opened and Erwin honestly wanted to laugh. Divine intervention. There was no other word for it as Guyver Yin walked in without preamble until he was before Erwin's desk. Rockbell, who had originally been occupying the space Yin now took residence over, stood to the side. It was rather humorous that an older man could look down at a younger one with such wide-eyed fear.
"We need to talk." The boy said- No, declared. He spared Rockbell a glace, who flinched, and then looked back to Erwin. "Alone." There was an air of authority about him, something Erwin and Mike had only seen a glimpse of the previous day when the matter of Eren Yeager had come up. Erwin looked the boy over, taking in the stillness of his firm stance. He was dressed in his white, long-sleeved shirt and black trousers whilst forgoing the black suit and tie. It made him look younger, though did not retract the noticeable wryness that clung to his countenance.
He wasn't going to take no for an answer.
How interesting.
Erwin turned his blue eyes to Captain Rockbell. "I'll leave the matter in yours and the Military Police's hands, Captain." With a hasty salute and affirmative, Erwin watched as the red-haired man beat a hasty retreat out the door. Once he was gone, Erwin quickly explained the man's presence. "That man was part of the Military Police. He's going to hold an investigation of the recruits, to see if they can find the-"
"Spy."
The word was like a boulder, smashing through Erwin's words and his mind went white. When he could only stare at the boy, genuinely stunned to silence, Yin continued. "The one who killed Hanji's Titans is someone who knows about Eren and his ability to shift into a Titan. Commander Pixis made this knowledge know back in Trost, so it has to be someone who was there at that time, but the deaths of the Titans implies a deeper level of understanding. This person knows the truth about the Titans. They more than likely what Eren because of his ability to shift and it's not unreasonable to assume that this person is like Eren, more than likely the Armored and Colossal Titans from five years ago."
As Erwin stared wide-eyed at the boy for a long moment, much like a student would after a teacher's lengthy lecture, he idly wondered if anyone had ever given him as many moment's pauses as the White Guardian had. Hanji would definitely be a close second. He smiled, feeling quite pleased. "You've been very well trained."
"I told you not to underestimate me, Commander. I had the truth about the Armored and Colossal figured out back in Trost, it was obvious once you saw Eren. But that's not the issue here. I'm more curious as to why you're keeping this information to yourself."
Erwin felt a frisson of disappointment. The boy had deduced the situation, understood the enemy and possible suspects but didn't seem to understand the magnitude such information possessed. He decided to tell him. "If I tell all of the Survey Corps this, doubt and suspicion would run rampant through the ranks. Comrade would turn on comrade and there'll be mass panic. And if this spy is indeed one of our own, then they'll be able to think of a counter attack. Taking this into consideration, I've asked people the question. Those who answer rightly, I tell them the truth."
"And has anyone deduced your questions?"
"Yes. Hanji, Levi & Mike. Those who weren't able to answer correctly, like Eren and Levi's Squad members, tell me that they are free from suspicion."
Yin was silent for a moment, eyes falling to the space between them, and Erwin took that moment to observe his face. The fair skin and emotional brown eyes, swimming with countless thoughts that Erwin couldn't begin to fathom. Then, suddenly, understanding flared in his eyes. "This is why you don't want me and Estevan to fix the gate in Trost," He breathed, hushed, and it was difficult for Erwin to pinpoint the emotions in his voice. He looked up to meet Erwin's eyes and the Commander saw the horrified realization on the boy's face clearly. "This is why you're conducting an expedition only a month after Trost. It's not an expedition at all, it's a trap! You're making a trap for the spy!"
Oh, he was smart, wasn't he? It broke Erwin's heart that the young man before him was already a hero, for if he were a new recruit, he had little doubt that he would turn out to be one of his best soldiers. Oh well, one could dream. He kept his smile from growing. "You're very perceptive, Yin. Yes, you have it. The only way for us to obtain this spy is to lure them out into a wide, open area. Using the path from Trost is too straight, too simple. We would be hard-pressed to form a trap on that path. I'm still working on the details, but I know for a fact that if we use the land between the Karanes District and Shinganshina, we can successfully capture this traitor."
That was nothing but the truth. Erwin knew very well that the path from Trost, while indeed the most direct route to Shinganshina, offered little cover save the odd village and even they were far and between. The area from the Karanes District southwards would, for the most part, be unused land. It was safe to assume that the spy would be unfamiliar with the area. It would serve his purposes perfectly.
"And, even if we're right about this spy, assuming this little plan of yours works, how many people do you imagine will die?!" Yin yelled the last word and Erwin could only stare at the expression on his face, smile gone. It was the same look he had seen on hundreds of his men after an expedition. It was the same look even the most hardened of veterans could have upon their faces.
It was the same expression Erwin had briefly caught a glimpse of when he had mentioned the average rate of deaths to Yin yesterday.
The horrified, haunted look of a person who could fathom the loss of people, not after seeing it so many times before.
And it was then that Erwin Smith realised that he had been wrong. Standing before him was not Guyver Yin, the White Guardian, stoic and unflappable. Standing before him was Joshua Martin, young and so very human.
"This is incredibly dangerous." Joshua rasped and Erwin knew that he was trying to stress to him the sheer gravity of his plan. "One wrong move, the slightest deviation or miscalculation, and hundreds of people could die! Far more than your thirty percent average." Those last words were spat heavily and the young man sounded sickened to speak them.
And Erwin kept his face blank, unreadable in the face of the hero's horror. "I'm well aware of that."
"Then why-?!"
"I think you are forgetting that we don't have the luxuries of your world or the abilities that you and your brother have," Erwin said his words slowly, carefully. While this Guardian was not as quick to anger as his brother appeared to be, he was quite certain that his disgust would flare into anger. How did the saying go? Beware the nice ones? "You two may have had ways to do things better in your world, ways that would result in fewer deaths, but here we can't take that easy route. My men are aware of this, they have dedicated their hearts and souls to humanity's future, and as such, they will give their lives if they have to."
At the look on the boy's face, he decided to add softly. "I know this is horrible and despite what you and your brother might think of me, I do hate sacrificing the lives of my comrades. But I have an oath to follow as well and you can be assured that, for the sake of humanity, I will uphold that oath until the bitter end."
Erwin Smith was many things. Liar, manipulator, Commander. But right then, right there, he spoke his words from his very soul.
Judging by the look on Joshua's face, he believed him. He looked utterly haggard beyond his years and seemed to deflate with the large sigh that left him, bowing his head and reaching his hands up to rub his face tiredly. "I won't stop you," He eventually said, flatly, not removing his hand or raising his head. His hands were covering his eyes as though he were weeping. "Despite how much I want to, and how much my brother will want to, we can't-do anything to change your mind. It's not our place, and besides, it's not as though we would think of anything better.
"But let me tell you this..." Joshua Martin straightened and removed his hands. He met Erwin's gaze squarely and the man was startled to discover that he couldn't read the boy. His face was a blank canvas, giving nothing despite his earlier outburst. Erwin looked at the boy and realized that this wasn't Joshua Martin, this was Guyver Yin. This was his composer on full force. His mask. The voice that he spoke in was ominously low. "This is one hell of a gamble you're playing, and you can be certain that me and my brother will save the lives you're so willing to sacrifice."
And again, just like all the other times the hero as spoken sternly to Erwin, there was no discernible threat in his words. Not that there was any need for one, really. He knew that he could never understand the level of the Guyvers power, but he was more than certain that they could make his death as simple or as agonizing as they wished for it to be.
In the end, that was how one determined the threat of an enemy. It was by how much they could make one suffer.
Erwin nodded. "I would expect nothing less of you two."
Joshua's grimace was deep, disgust radiating from his still form as he turned and left. With a sharp wave of his hand, the door opened for him. And while Erwin had to know something, just one more thing, he felt it didn't really need asking. Speaking with Guyver Yin and Joshua Martin had told him enough.
The door slammed shut.
Estevan Martinez was fuming.
Or was seething a better word? Did it even matter?
No, it didn't.
He was pissed and that was that.
Dress within his dark top and jeans, uncaring for the minor tears and rips in them, he leaned against the wall of the outermost part of the castle as the midday breeze washed over him. His maroon eyes were closed and his arms were crossed, hiding his feelings from anyone who happened to find him. God, he hoped no one did. He just wanted to be alone for a while, was that too much to ask?
Would the universe deprive him of even that?
Scowling deeply, Estevan tried to put a lid on his temper. Keyword being tried. Ever since he had known the Brit, Josh had always amazed Estevan with his seemingly endless patience. He could take being spat in the face and being mocked without a hint of annoyance, often waiting to drop some dry quip or shewed insult that would have the American in stitches. Granted, he had mellowed out considerably since they had met, but it was a nearly universal fact that Josh was better at keeping himself contained. Hence the reason he didn't mind letting Josh take the lead during their trial.
Estevan wasn't like that and was glad not to be.
Whenever he got angry, he allowed himself to be controlled by it. He had enough sense to know who the anger was for, but feeling the rage scorching him was cathartic in its own right. He honestly couldn't imagine being like Josh, containing all his rage and pain until it became unbearable. It was unhealthy, dangerous even, but Estevan wasn't about to change Josh.
He had long since accepted that if that was how the Brit dealt with his shit, then fine. Estevan would deal with it in his own way. And as such, the urge to go out and rip some Titans apart was really tempting, so was the urge to start a fight with that runt Levi and put him in his place.
He had been quite happily resting in his bed, finally enjoying the comforts of a long rest, only for his door to be slammed opened by his brother. Once he noticed the troubled look on Josh's face all thought of sleep was quickly forgotten.
Then Josh told him what had happened, his meeting with Commander Erwin, and Estevan went from concerned to furious in the beat of a heart.
"I'm gonna kill him." He remembered getting up, body becoming taut as rage crawled up the back his throat like fire. The, suddenly thinking about appealing using his Hyper Napalm attack sounded.
"Estevan, wait-" Josh had held up his hands, expression pleading.
It had little effect. "Fuck waiting! That bastard, that cold heart son of a-!"
"I said wait!" Just as he was about the step back Josh, the Brit moved in a blur of motion before grabbing him and throwing him back. He had flown across the room before colliding with the wardrobe and landing roughly on the ground. It was a miracle that it hadn't broken.
Right, that had pissed him off.
His expression darkening, Estevan recalled how Josh had pushed against his anger, firmly explaining to Estevan how killing the bastard Commander would be a clusterfuck for everyone. He hadn't cared, at all, and a strained Joshua had demanded to know what Estevan expected to do once that was done. Pointedly, he asked if Estevan was going to become the leader of the Survey Corps himself.
He asked if he wanted to become a soldier.
Disgust and shock had hit him so strongly that he had been rendered mute. In his silence, Josh apologized and painstakingly explained that they needed the support of the Survey Corps and that Erwin's plan, however daring it was, was the best they were going to get. He claimed that they wouldn't have been able to think of any better, shutting down Estevan's protest that they could.
Josh told him, clearly, that they wouldn't be able to find the spy without Erwin. And, with a dawning sense of horror and revulsion, he realized how true those words were.
He still couldn't believe it. Not only did Estevan had to deal with man-eating monsters and soldiers, but now he had to deal with some kind of spy. A spy who was probably within their sights and they had no way of knowing. For all the power the Guyvers granted them, they weren't detectives.
The discussion had ended there, more or less, with Estevan throwing on his clothes and making his way for some late breakfast. Josh hadn't followed him. The little fool was probably making both their beds. The twit.
Sighing, Estevan rubbed a hand over his face. "Damn it, Josh," He muttered, his sullen eyes peering through his fingers as he gazed at the sky above. It was a clear and sunny day, with a touch of clouds impeding the sunlight's journey. "How could you allow that maniac to do this?"
Erwin Smith was insane.
There wasn't a smidgen of doubt in Estevan's mind for this fact, because no one in their right mind would do something that could lead to the death of hundreds of people. Well, no one human, anyway.
Even if it was for something as grandiose as the ultimate survival of humanity, how could it be worth such meaningless death and destruction?
"I wouldn't do that," He thought ferociously, a determined expression crossing his face. "I would do the task myself, without putting anyone at risk. I'd-"
His thoughts came to an abrupt end when his sharp hearing caught the sound of someone crying, somewhere to his left.
It wasn't a male, removing the possibility of it being either Josh or Eren, but a woman's voice. Curiosity catching him in a firm grip, he followed his ears to the source. He didn't have to go far, ultimately turning a corner of the castle's perimeter and peeking over to finding none other than Hanji Zoe.
She was crying.
The mere sight of this caught him off guard. So far, the woman had seemed like an unstoppable ball of energy. And yet, here she was, sitting on the grass with her knees tucked into her chest like some child in the shadow of the castle. Estevan grimaced, caught at a crossroad. Typically, he wouldn't bat an eye to a person's suffering. He'd let them deal with it on their own, not really caring if it had any long-lasting effect. If they were someone he cared about, like Josh, he would try his best to make them feel better. Let it never be said that he was good with people, but for his friends, he would always try.
But Hanji Zoe was a soldier. And Estevan hated soldiers. But she was also crying and someone so cheerful had no right being so sad. There wasn't anyone around to comfort her. And Hanji, for all her weirdness, had so far been nothing but nice to him and Josh-
"God-fucking-damn it, I am going soft!" He blamed Josh. To the moon and back, he blamed his brother for this.
"Oi," He said, for a lack of anything better. He walked over the corner and walked over to the woman.
Hanji looked up at him, face wet with tears. His heart twinged before he smothered the feeling. "Oh, hey Yang."
He really needed to explain to her that, when outside his armour, he preferred to be called by his real name. He decided to run it by her later if given the chance. "What's up with you?"
It was then that Estevan remembered an important lesson about women, especially the emotional/overacting ones: Never, no matter what, ask them what's made them upset. Hanji proved his point spectacularly as she suddenly screamed like a cat in heat, looking like a woman in incredible pain, the proof of her tear ducts working overtime streaming down her face. "SAWNEY! BEANE!"
"What the fuck?!" Estevan exclaimed, jumping back at her outburst. Right, her test toys had been killed by this spy. He felt no sympathy for the dead Titans, part of him wishing he had done the deed himself, but Christ, did she have to make a scene about it? He watched in morbid fascination as she buried her face in her knees, sobbing as though she had just lost a baby.
He continued to watch her, torn. Part of Estevan was rather disturbed and wanted nothing more than to turn the other way and leave the nutbag alone. He was very tempted to. But still, that part of him persisted, that part that Josh more often than not brought out him. Hell, it wasn't even that, really. Estevan's honest urge to help people when their down was raging strong against his cynicism.
Then, a part of himself that he tried to keep buried away, reminded him how much he hated seeing a woman cry.
"Shit," He cursed, running a hand through his hair. He thought hard about what to do. He wasn't about to degrade himself into comforting her physically, that shit was Josh's department. Then he remembered something. Hanji wanted to know more about him and Josh's abilities, about the Guyver in general. While he had no intention of telling her how to make new weapons, he had no problem showing off his abilities to her. After all, it wasn't like she could mimic bio attacks. Perhaps if he took her to a remote area he could put to rest her inquisitive mind and make her feel better.
But there was also something in the back of his head telling him that he was literally signing his own death warrant and that she was probably going to find a way to strap him down to a table and dissect him like a frog. But then another part of him, which sounded suspiciously a lot like Joshua Martin, told him to stop being a pussy and stop her from crying her eyes out.
He was going to kick Josh's ass for this.
Willing himself back near her, he tapped her trembling shoulder. "Hey, wanna see how my Guyver works?" Almost immediately Hanji stopped crying as she raised her head to met his eyes. With her teary face, she looked like a dejected kitten. Oh, now that just wasn't fair. "I have nothing better to do with my time and Josh is probably neck deep in a book right now, so how about it? Would you...like to see my Guyver's abilities?" He had to slightly force out the words, but it seemed to go unnoticed.
Hanji's was suddenly on her feet, her hands clasping his own and shoving her still wet face into his. Estevan drew back in revulsion. Her eyes were sparkling. Probably because of the tears, he surmised. "Really?" Hanji squealed, sounding overjoyed.
"Yes..." Estevan really should have walked in the opposite direction.
"Thank you!" Hanji screeched, so loudly it nearly left him deaf before she released him, bouncing in ecstasy. "AH, this is it! MY DREAM HAS COME TRUE! I finally get to know what makes you tick!" Quickly scrubbing her face free of tears and snot, she promptly grabbed him by the wrist and dragged him along. Estevan could only gape, trying hard not to figure out what that wetness on her palm was. "C'mon, I know a great area where you can go all out! I've read all the reports from Shinganshina, those that weren't made up by people who weren't there at the time, and I can't wait to see your powers in the flesh!"
Sighing as she went on, Estevan could only lament how this was all Josh's fault.
Joshua Martin suddenly sneezed before looking around in confusion, wondering who was talking about him.
Eren smothered yet another huge yawn into a fist, head turned away from the window he was cleaning to avoid his breath fogging up the glass. He was fairly certain that it was already clean, his currently foggy memory telling him that soldiers had been in this hallway on the second level of the castle yesterday, but he dared not voice this to Captain Levi.
His eyes closed as he sighed and they remained closed, enjoying the comfort the dark gave him. He must have looked quite the sight, with the dirty rag dangling in his right hand. Once he had composed himself after his realization on his current predicament and misfortunes, Eren had been called by the Military Police members who questioned him about his whereabouts during the previous night. He had answered truthfully, if a bit tensely, pointing to the still sobbing Hanji for confirmation. After nearly half an hour of back and forth talk, he had been allowed to leave. Immediately after, just as he had been hoping to go to his room and sleep for a few hours, he had been swept away by Captain Levi into cleaning.
To say that hadn't pissed him off would be a lie.
A dull pain shot through Eren's forehead and his eyes snapped open, head jerking back. He had fallen asleep, just for a moment, and his body had slumped forward to meet the window. His hazy eyes noticed the small smudge that now marred the glass. Blushing furiously and quickly making sure that his Captain wasn't around to see it, Eren quickly wiped it away.
He was certain that Jean and Connie would find him falling asleep whilst cleaning funny, and if the roles were reversed he probably would too, but he knew with a chilling sense of certainty that Levi would be less than pleased. He'd probably shove a broom up his ass, then make him clean it. Eren shuddered at the thought, the window squeaking as he continued to rub it with the rag.
He willed himself to think of something else.
Rather unsurprisingly, his thoughts drifted to the Guyvers.
Since they had arrived at the castle, Eren had hardly seen either brother. Neither of the two had come anywhere near him or Levi's Squad, seemingly wanting to keep as much distance between them as possible. Rumor had it that Yin had been in Commander Erwin's office twice, but for what reasons were unknown. He had listened to the hushed whispering of other soldiers, mostly comprised of jealousy and contempt. What right, they said, had the Guyvers earned to speak in private with their Commander? How could they be allowed to be around the Survey Corps, showing them up with their incredible powers, more or less making them all redundant? And how, they spat with scorn, great could they possibly be if they were just two young men?
Every dour word made anger hit Eren like white-hot arrows, making his fists clench and his teeth bared. It took all his willpower not to turn and attack them. He could take the sour looks and hushed whispers about him, he expected and deserved them, but to speak so lowly of his heroes was unacceptable! After everything they had done, all the people they had saved, they had earned every right to a lot of things.
And yet—
Despite working together so closely during Trost, not to mention them standing up for him before that Garrison Captain, Eren still found it hard to downright impossible to connect with them.
Eren had always seen the Guyver as above everyone, including himself. He knew that getting close to them would not simply happen overnight. The distance between them and humanity was like a large bridge. The Guyvers were on one side and humanity, including himself, were on the other. The bridge was full of faults and dangers, the slightest wrong move would result in the trekker either dying or becoming lost. Eren always felt as though he had a clear path, regardless of how limited his interactions with the brothers had been, yet had enough sense to wait until he crossed that bridge.
But now, with the knowledge that the Guyvers were, in fact, human, the bridge suddenly wasn't so daunting. It was smaller and easier to cross, and the two were so close to Eren that he would reach out and touch them. He could, he knew, and yet he still dared not cross the bridge.
Even without the impassive faces of the Guyvers, both brothers seems so controlled and so professional that Eren felt like he was supposed to be on his best behaviour when they were present. He found himself glancing over corners of hallways and looking over his shoulders, suddenly fearing that the two would appear and notice him doing something incredibly stupid. Any time he had found them, spying them behind a corner, he would run in the opposite direction. It felt like there was nothing he could do that wouldn't make him look like a jackass in front of them, except avoid them and make himself as invisible as possible. He still found himself incapable of finding something to speak to them about.
It annoyed Eren to no end that the two made him feel so diffident, made him so unsure and uneasy of himself that he wanted to punch something.
But honestly, that wasn't the problem. The fact that the Guyvers were human should have made things so much easier for Eren. Suddenly, they weren't so impossible to get close to. Suddenly, he could approach them without flinching under their blood red gaze. Suddenly, talking to them casually didn't seem like such a pipe dream.
He just felt that there was something missing between them, some warmth or affection that should be there but wasn't.
Again, Eren knew that he and the Guyvers wouldn't just click together. Their interactions had been brief and always in the middle of danger, there had been no time for them to just stop and chat. However, it was exactly these interactions that gave Eren a moments pause. Suddenly, he wondered if he had been completely wrong about his supposed friendship with the brothers.
The squeaks of the window became deeper, harsher.
He put himself in their position, trying to see those moments through their eyes:
He's a well-experienced warrior who's fought many battles, saved many lives, who has been transported to a world that is not his own. Then, with barely any time at all to understand this world, it goes to hell. Panic and chaos rampant in the streets, the first thing to do is to assess the situation and help people. Then he finds a family being torn apart, a mother facing an imminent death as her children watch on in horror. There is no choice, no second-guessing, he has to save her. He does, and the children. He looks after the children because he must. Because the children's world is crumbling around them and they need anchors to stop them from going adrift. He makes sure that they are safe. And then, and only then, can he be allowed to save the world and everyone else.
But there's no point in going back to them. Because they are small, because they have their own lives to lead, and because they're nothing special in the end. Just another faceless person that he's saved.
His hand stopped moving the rug, now still. Subconsciously, he pushed his hand against the window.
Perhaps that was the reason for it. The brothers had saved him, Mikasa and his mother and that were all it was to them. They didn't feel any obligation to get close to them because that act had been no different to how they would treat anyone else in the same situation. They probably just saw Eren as a person they had saved and fate or whatever had simply brought them back together. Nothing more, nothing less.
Or maybe, he suddenly thought, the problem was him.
"Damn it." A frown cut deeply into Eren's face, his hand pressing firmly against the window while the other clenched into a trembling fist.
The thought was like a blacksmith's hammer to the gut, sending waves of gut-wrenching anxiety through him. The thought was sudden, a purely flippant idea, but it resonated with such truth it made him sick. God, it was him, wasn't it?
"Damn it." Teeth pressed firmly together, lips peeling away, he pushed harder against the window.
He's always known that he's trouble, been told it enough by just about everyone he knew. Mother always bemoaned of his attitude before the Fall. Hannes always thought of him as a runt with a chip on his shoulder who he never took seriously. Half of the 104th Training Corps couldn't stand him. Even Armin and Mikasa, who both knew him better than anyone else, could probably make books full of his character flaws. The latter, more often than not, called him out on these flaws regularly.
Maybe he was just too much for the Guyvers to befriend. He's hot-tempered, antagonistic, insecure. Hadn't his father once told him that he often looked for the worse in people, as if he were looking for conflict? This, he supposed, was what it meant for him to try and be good with people who had no bad in them, who he really didn't know.
They probably just didn't like him.
He shouldn't care but he did.
And the mere idea that they didn't like him broke his heart.
"DAMN IT!" In a flash of white-hot anger, that familiar loathing scorching him deeply to his core, Eren drew back his palm and thrust it against the window. It went right through it, making a hole with jagged teeth. He cursed again when one of those teeth sunk into his wrist, cutting deeply. Blood leapt from his wrist and onto the window, ruining it as the crimson fluid crawled down it. Blind on rage and pain, Eren rubbed the rag over the blood and only succeeded in creating a large smudge. With another vehement curse, he threw it down and clasped his left hand to his right wrist, staring hatefully at the mess he had made.
Then the blood coating his hands went warm, boiling in fact, and morbid fascination took Eren as he watched the steam rise from his wrist under his hand. Remove it and receiving a face-full of steam, he watched the cut seal close. There wasn't even a scar. Disgust coiling in his chest, Eren picked up the ruined rag and left to get a bucket of water. He prayed that he wouldn't run into Levi or any of his Squad members, painfully away of how bloody his hands and uniform were. Head hung low like a scolded child, he found himself drifted back onto his head.
He found himself thinking of the world the Guyvers had come from, the world that didn't have Titans, the world that was apparently far more advanced than their own. He thought of the lives the two might of had, of the things they must have battled with the Guyvers. He thought of the people they must have known, the friends they must have had. Those people must have been like him, in a way, awed by the brothers' power but having the commitment and strength to follow them. They probably proved themselves to the brothers, gaining their respect the way a person would. Those people must have been better, Eren thought, than both himself and this world's wretched humans. They must have been everything Eren wasn't and maybe that was why they and the brothers worked when Eren didn't.
Those people probably would never be in the position he was in, an incompetent child burdened with the responsibility of humanity's survival.
Then Eren ran into someone and nearly fell flat on his ass.
"Hey, watch-!" The miffed words of the other came to an abrupt stop and Eren looked up to see them. It was a small trio of male soldiers, each looking at Eren with the same look of surprise on their faces. The one he had bumped into was a dirty blonde, the one on his left was a sandy brown and the one on his right was a darker brown. They were all older than him, had him beat on height and seemed to all be of similar ages.
The lead blonde's countenance, one of naked shock, morphed into murderous hate. "You."
Eren didn't see the fist fly out before it contacted with his cheek, snapping his head to the side and almost sending him to the ground. The sandy brown then grabbed him by the hair in a tight hold, yanking. Eren's cry of pain was muffled by the sound of the man's left fist hitting him in the face. He let go of Eren's hair for the second hook, sending Eren stumbling back. The other brown was then on him, taking handfuls of his uniform and throwing him to the wall between some windows. He then grabbed him again and spun, releasing Eren once they went 180 degrees and the boy's back slammed into the opposite wall before he slid down it.
Panting, face burning, Eren sent the trio a furious glower. They stood a short distance away in a small half circle, giving him their own looks of hate. Eren felt fluid run out his nose and could taste blood on his lips, the coppery life-fluid igniting his taste buds and senses. With a yell, Eren charged. His left fist flew through the air, aiming for the blonde but missing as he manoeuvred out of the way. The man shot his own hard left jab into Eren's face, bursting his lips. Momentarily blinded by the pain, Eren offered no defence as the dark brown soldier shot a middle kick into his stomach. Eren fell to the ground, legs turned to jelly, wheezing.
Spitting out a mouthful of boiling blood, Eren tried to push himself back up. A hand grasped the back of his uniform and he was hauled to his feet, once again slammed back into the wall. The blonde took two handfuls of the front of his uniform, hoisting Eren off the ground slightly so that they were almost eye to eye. The other two were close by his side, each by a shoulder. The sandy brown had a look of repulsed fascination on his face. "Look at his lips..."
Eren could feel the flesh healing, burning in an ethereal way that was neither painful or pleasant.
"So it's true, you can heal. Just like a Titan." The dark brown said, disgusted.
Eren bared his blood-stained teeth, glaring defiantly at the trio. Idly, he was aware that he was standing on his tiptoes. "What the hell are you doing?" He hissed, refusing to scream the words. He wouldn't give them the satisfaction.
The blonde gave him a look of fury, his voice remarkably light. "Our friends died, fighting your kind outside the Walls, whilst you were busy playing hero with the Guardians. They died screaming, alone, all their dream robbed from them. Because of your kind."
The words hit Eren like a fist, knocking the wind from him. He stared at them in mute horror. "I-I'm not-"
"We were all part of the same training group, all of us." The blonde continued as if Eren hadn't said anything. "We didn't even have time to mourn or collect their bodies when we heard the news about Trost. And what do we learn when we get there? That a Titan had allied itself with the Guardians, protecting the people." He barked a mirthless laugh, his glare sharpening. "And then? This Titan is made a member of the Survey Corps, of Captain Levi's Squad, overnight. You've gotten to a position most of us here have bled and broken bones for, spent years training for!"
"I trained too!" Eren yelled, unable to contain himself, relishing the way the three of them drew back slightly. Vicious, scathing anger had filled his entire being and was demanding release. "Three years, to become a soldier!"
"YOU DIDN'T EARN IT!" The blonde roared, voice laced with poison and furious indignation. "We worked our way up the ranks, losing the people we cared about in the process! You got here because, and only because you can turn into a Titan! Have you ever actually seen a Titan as a human? Felt their breath as they try to devour you? Watch your friends get eaten and listen to their screams when there was nothing you can do to save them?!"
I have, Eren wanted to scream but couldn't get the words past the rock in his throat. Because his memories of Trost were vague and hard to remember, his time before turning into a Titan and after like dream that he could barely recall. His time in his Titan form was like holes in his memories, with only the words of his friends and others to fill in the gaps. After Pixis had saved them, Armin had been the one to tell Eren what happened to their small squad. Save himself and Mina, and there was no need for the blonde to remind him of what happened to Thomas, Nac and Mylius had all died shortly after he had been bitten.
Each name had taken a bit of Eren's heart as they fell from Armin's lips.
"I don't know what the Commander was thinking, taking a thing like you into our ranks, but I'm not about to question his orders. However," The blonde released the boy and then thrust his knee into his stomach. Eren gagged, the wind knocked right out of him, and the blonde drove his left fist hard into his face. Eren fell gracelessly to the ground, feeling the eyes of the men on his pain riddled form. "That doesn't mean we have to accept this. We know the Captain will probably punish us for it, but fuck it. Our friend's deaths will not go unpun-"
"HEY!" The word was like a knife, cutting through the air and the pain that swarmed Eren's mind. The voice, he recognized it. And when he forced himself up onto his hands like some poor push up, tongue stained with blood, Eren felt a mixed wave of elation and dread roll over him.
Guyver Yin, dressed in a long-sleeved shirt and black trousers, was walking towards them. No, walking implied he was calm. His face, Eren noted with surprise, showed that he clearly wasn't. Eyes blown wide, teeth barred, left hand pointing at the trio, the young man was a picture of anger as he stomped over to them. "Leave him alone!" He barked, words bouncing off the walls of the otherwise empty hallway.
Eren glancing up at the men, hoping to see them go pale and run like hell, like those bullies back in Shinganshina did whenever they saw him. But they didn't. If anything, the look of hate on the blonde's face grew darker. His voice still retained that remarkable lightness as he addressed his friends. "Well, lady luck seems to be shining on us, guys. First the freak, and now the White Guardian graces us with his presence."
Yin came to a stop a few feet away, anger leaking away into a glacial expression. "Don't call Eren a freak," He uttered, voice so soft that Eren almost missed the words. It took him a moment to register exactly what he had said.
The blonde laughed again, this time full of scorn. "Oh, how sweet. The White God is taking pity on the Titan." He then scowled as though he had eaten something incredibly bitter. "Leave, will you? This has nothing to do with you."
"In any other circumstance, you might have been right." Yin's voice took a casual, aloof edge, hands linking behind his back. "However, as far as I can see, you're hurting Eren for no apparent reason. I'm afraid I cannot let that continue for even a second longer."
"No reason, you say? Our friends died fighting the Titans outside the Walls, hundreds like them suffered the same fate! It's an insult to their memory that this freak is in our uniform!" The emphasis on the words, on the insult that stung Eren in a way he so desperately wanted to ignore, wasn't missed on the boy and he watched Yin's expression carefully.
Nothing, not even a flicker. Then, "Pathetic."
"...What did you say?"
"Pathetic," Yin repeated emotionlessly. "What makes your friends more important than all the other people who've died in these past one hundred years, in these last five years? What makes them their deaths worthy justification for beating an innocent boy?"
"Innocent?!" Hissed the blonde, expression murderous. He looked like he was barely holding his composure together. His friends looked just as angry. "This brat is one of them, he's-"
"Not a Titan," The space between Yin's brows creased ever so slightly. "You're truly pathetic if you're blaming Eren for what happened to your comrades, especially given that you're a soldier. You should be aware that death on the battlefield is expected, as I'm sure they knew as well. If you aren't ready to accept that, then you shouldn't of become a soldier."
"How dare-!"
"Furthermore, you should be thanking Eren for all that he's done for you. Were it not for his efforts, not only would Trost remain lost, but all of the lands of Wall Rose would be overrunning with Titans. So, in short, he's more than worthy of the uniform. He's a hero, which is more than what I can say for you."
The blonde was silent, face a picture of furious outrage that was mirrored by his two companions. Eren stared at the Guardian, stunned to silence. Of all the things he expected to hear from him, what had been spoken were the last thing. His eyes went back to the blonde and he saw that his fury had doused into something colder but no less threating. His eyes promised retribution. "You know," He began in a low monotone. To Eren's surprise, he moved forward, his friends following "So many people have different opinions on you and your brother. Some call you Gods, like that Cult, others call you demons. The best thing and the worst thing to ever happen to humanity. Personally? I never much cared for the legends. But many of my friends, including those whose deaths you're so willing to overlook, did."
The hallway was spacious enough to hold a large number of people if needed, Eren knew due to the rigorous cleaning session Captain Levi had sent him and the others on yesterday. Standing in the middle, the trio had no problem circling the boy. The sandy blonde stood to his right, the brown to his left and the main blonde was before him. Panic sunk its fangs into Eren's heart and he moved to get up, his body protesting against the sudden movement and forcing him to remain in a crouched position. He was fully able to see Yin, view half blocked by the blonde, as he stared up at the man apathetically. "I wish they could see you now," Said the blonde, words leaving him in a venomous hiss. Eren noticed how tense his body was, like a snake ready to strike. "See that, in the end, you couldn't give a damn about what happened to the men and women who-"
"Would you stop, please?" Yin interrupted, sounded as exasperated as he looked. He gave the blonde a particularly bored stare. "I would really rather not embarrass all of you in front of Eren. More for your own sake than his, really." His gaze hardened. "One last chance to walk away."
The blonde stared at Yin, open-mouthed, before scoffing with a faintly amused expression. "You arrogant prick," He spat, "It's three against one and you aren't in your fancy armour. So I think-"
"It's one against one, actually," Yin stated, bored expression back in place. It was, Eren found, the face one made when they were forced into a situation they had endured numerous times before.
The blonde shared baffled, yet amused, looks with his friends. There was more than a hint of mockery in his voice when he asked. "How do you figure?" Despite the situation, Eren couldn't help but be rather curious as well. What was the Guardian getting at?
"Once I take out you, the leader, these two will run," Yin explained calmly, gesturing at the blonde and then to the other two men as he spoke. He was speaking as though he were asking how much sugar the men would like in their tea. "Of course, that depends on how loyal they are to you, so we'll see about that."
The blonde looked Yin over, perhaps amused or unimpressed, and Eren had to seriously wonder how stupid the man was to think that he had a pixie's chance in hell of actually beating the White Guardian. Had he not seen Yin walking on the walls, without his armour?! "You, uh, you done this before?"
"Enough times for it to no longer be amusing, especially against prats like you, so if we can get on with it?" Yin truly sounded like he hadn't a care in the world.
The blonde seemed to decide that was enough, slightly turning his body whilst he raised his arms with fists clenched. His friends noticeably readied themselves as well, though seemed to be waiting for their leader to make the first move. Yin said one last thing that gave him a moment's pause. "Remember: I warned you."
The blonde attacked.
His right fist jutted out in a swift strike that Yin spun around the avoid, manoeuvring himself so his left elbow came into contact with the man's ribs, Then, not even a second later, his right elbow slammed into his solar plexus. He doubled forward with a grunt of pain, only to fall back onto his ass when the boy slammed the back of his right fist into his face.
The sandy blonde and the brown-haired man flinched, clearly taken aback by how quickly their friend had been beaten. But they didn't run as Yin had half expected them too. Though looking as though they were clearly uncomfortable with what was happening, they raised their arms in preparation to fight.
Yin saw this and nodded, looking almost impressed as the blonde groaned on the ground behind him. He rolled his shoulders, saying, "Loyal after all. Okay then, let's get this over with."
He intercepted the sandy blonde's right haymaker with both forearms before slamming it down in a hammer motion with his right fist. The force caused the man's body to straighten, giving Yin the chance to quickly drive his left elbow across his cheek. The man when down like a sack of potatoes, hands flying over his face.
Yin didn't stop for a moment, quickly turning to grab the foot sent towards him in a kick and forcing the leg upwards. The brown-haired man's yelp of surprise turned into a sharp cry of pain when Yin drove his fist into his unprotected groin. His pain allowed Yin to perform his next move, moving closer as his foot moved around the foot keeping the man up. With his free hand, he placed it on the man's chest and shoved as he pulled his foot back to kick the man's leg off the ground. Yin moved his body so he could make the man's back his the ground with a slam that made Eren wince.
Yin straightened, pulled up the ruffled cuffs of his shirt, and turned to the blonde. Up till that moment, the man had been in a crouched position like Eren was. He seemed to have completely forgotten about Eren, despite the fact that he was only a few feet behind him, his entire focus solely on the otherworldly boy. "You..." He breathed and Eren didn't need to see his face to hear that his voice was filled with hate. "wretched, inhuman..."
"I gave you a chance," Yin said wearily. "You should have taken it."
With an enraged roar, the blonde charged at Yin. There was very small space between them so the blonde went directly to attack, a right fist flying. Yin redirected it with the back of his right hand, immediately following with his left hand to grab the arm by the wrist and yank it down, his right hand then moving to attack. The blonde caught it easily by the wrist with his left hand, but Yin simply rolled his hand so he then could grasp the man's wrist. His right hand then shot out in its own fist, connecting solidly with the blonde's chest. He immediately followed with another strike to the chest with his left and then his hands were hammering into the man's chest at rapid speed.
Eren noticed as each strike sent the man back a step, that Yin did do the punch as one normally would. Instead of twisting his wrist as he delivered a punch, he kept his wrist straight. Yin ended his attack by jumping up, connecting his forehead with the blonde's nose. There was a crack, a cry of pain, and the blonde fell to the ground with his hands cradling his face.
Yin stared down at the withering blonde tiredly, expression not hinting to any pleasure or pride in having beaten the trio of men. In that moment, even without his armour, he was unreadable. After giving a sigh, he turned to Eren and the boy felt himself freeze up like a cornered animal.
But Yin wasn't looking at him with anything akin to anger or disgust. Sudden, Eren could very clearly read the expression on his face. He made his way over, stopped in front of him, and produced his left hand. There was a white symbol in his palm and Eren couldn't help but think of five years ago, back on the boat where his life had altered its course. "Are you alright, Eren?" He asked, voice gentle and caring.
Eren looked at the offered palm, disbelieving, then followed the arm it was attached to before meeting Yin's gaze. His Earth brown eyes were earnest and concerned, a far cry from the empty lantern eyes of the Guyver.
A sudden crushing feeling caused Eren to looked down to the ground, unable to stare at the older boy's face for a second longer. He gritted his teeth, fighting hard against the sudden onslaught of pain that threatened to overwhelm him. He didn't deserve it, he knew.
He didn't deserve the Guyver's concern for his life.
To be looked at so kindly.
And so, with that certainty, he ran. Sprinting away from his crouched position and his hero, ignoring his protesting body and how his heart tugged agonizingly when he heard Yin call out his name.
"I'm a coward."
That, too, was something he knew with absolute certainty.
"Oh, kid," Josh's face fell with pity, heart swelling with it as he watched the young soldier run. A frustrating cocktail of sadness and vexation swirled in his chest.
"Oi." Recognizing the voice immediately, he turned around and saw the roundhouse kick flying to meet his head.
In the seconds before the kick had finished its journey to his skull, he had two choices to choose from. He could make it so Levi was kicking a stone pillar or something that would cause substantially less damage to his leg. He chose the option which would be easier for all, the latter. He altered the molecular structure of his skull, making the hard carbon bones soft and pliant. The flesh of a Synevite. The only downside to this was that Josh had to endure the odd sensation of his brain morphing to shape his now indented skull. It felt incredibly weird.
He had to admit, the sound Levi made when his leg came into contact was quite satisfying and well worth the oddness.
"What the fuck?" Levi said and Josh was surprised that he didn't say the words louder. The short Captain's face was a picture of revulsion as he watched Josh's skull smoothly morph back into its proper shape.
A sensation as peculiar as the last, this time a sort of odd prickling feeling, filled his head as his skull returned to its normal molecular structure and something popped loudly as he rolled his lower jaw. "Captain," He greeted with a slight dip of his head, face carefully blank.
"Don't 'Captain' me, you little shit." Levi clearly was in no mood for small talk. Pity. He gestured to the groaning men at their feet with a hand. "Would you so kindly explain to me why the fuck you've beaten up these men?" The short man spoke in what was shaping up to be his usually monotone, but his eyes were cold and dangerous. They told him that Levi would attack him if he didn't like what he heard.
So Josh told him the truth. "These men were bullying Eren, blaming him for the deaths of their comrades. I happened to be passing by and decided to stop it. They set their sites on me and attacked me. I responded in kind."
It was brief, barely a second, but something flashed in Levi's dull blue eyes. He cast his eyes to the blonde, who was cradling his broken nose with his hands. Said hands were stained with crimson. Josh reflected on his actions. There had been no real need for him to injure the man, but the site of him standing over Eren like some schoolyard bully had done a masterful job at igniting the anger that had been festering under his skin.
He had been selfish, Josh thought, feeling not even the slightest jot of guilt in the realization. In any other circumstance, he would have dealt with a matter like this with a bit more grace. It had just felt so good to let loose some of his frustration. Not all of it, perhaps, but just a small bit. And besides, these men had bullied Eren.
Eren Yeager did not deserve that kind of pain. He had to find him when he was done here.
"That true, soldier?" Levi's question brought him back to the world. His voice didn't even hold a hint of anger, despite how frigid his gaze was.
Josh expected the blonde to lie. It wouldn't surprise him, really. He and his brother made such brilliant scapegoats. So it came as quite a shock to him when the blonde said. "Y-yes, Sir."
"Alright then." With that blandly spoken line, Levi promptly kicked the man in the face, blood and what looked like his first and second premolar flying out of his mouth. The blonde's cry of pain was loud in the otherwise silent hallway.
Josh grimaced, a spark of sympathy touching him. He quickly remembered that this was the man who had beaten Eren and ignored the feelings that came with the thought. He promptly decided that he was done here and needed to find Eren. "If you'll excuse me, Captain." Levi didn't seem to notice him leaving and the Brit only half listened to the Captain's dark promises of punishment for the blonde.
He never found Eren, and eventually stopped once it occurred to him that perhaps Eren just didn't want to be near him or Estevan.
The thought upset him more than he'd acknowledge.
Later that Night
Eren stared blankly at the ceiling of the basement, right hand draped over his brow. The Castle's basement was rather spacious, he admitted, perfect for supplies and current undesirable things to be put away. There were even cannons and cannonballs, removed from their positions and left to collect dust. Despite this, there was enough space for Eren to sleep as comfortably as he could.
The boy decided that he must have been one of those undesirable things, thankful that the Captain had at least given him a mattress, covers and a pillow that saved him from sleeping on the ground. His words before he left for some much-needed sleep rang in his mind. "I don't want to come down here and find this bed messy, you hear me, brat?"
"I hear you, Sir." Eren thought, a dark echo of his respectably spoken words hours prior. The Captain really had a bug up his ass about cleanliness.
The lack of any windows meant Eren had to take a candlestick with him to illuminate the place. Petra had kindly offered to get him more if this proved to be too little and Eren was quite certain that he would take her up on that offer. One candle was proving to hardly be sufficient but did the job lighting the space near Eren. He decided to place some in the candle holders on the walls in the morning. He didn't even bother to wonder why they hadn't already been placed before nightfall.
It was strange. Despite having lost an entire night's sleep thanks to Hanji, he felt remarkably restless. He had spent most of the day cleaning and then-
No, then thought with a frown, it wasn't strange at all.
With a sigh, Eren turned to lay on his side. His emerald eyes looked past the candle and towards the inky darkness, picturing the boxes, equipment and cannons. All sparkling clean, he might add.
After the incident with the trio, Levi had found him hidden away outside the castle. He had taken one look at Eren, who had not exactly been in his best form then, and told him that they wouldn't be bothering him again. Eren didn't even bother asking how the Captain knew, assuming that Yin had told the man after he scampered like a frightened rat. Then, without preamble, the short man had dragged Eren to get clean. He didn't say anything about the blood. Eren was oddly thankful and resentful for that. Once he was, Levi had brought him to the basement, shoved a rug and bucket into his hands and flatly ordered him to make the place sparkle. He didn't even wait for a response as he walked off, muttering something about cleaning the blood.
Eren had the sinking suspicion he had seen the broken window.
Neither Yin nor Yang came to find him and he was so grateful for that. He didn't want either of them to see him for what he truly was. Past the Titan body he could create and control, the loud words he vomited forth like a madman, he was nothing but weak.
"Weak." The word seared deeply into him, just like it did every time, just like it had after the Fall. His fight with the men had proven, all so clearly, that he was only strong when he was within his Titan body. Without it, without that quality that made others see him as a monster, he was nothing. They, a group of mere men, had beaten him so easily that it was laughable.
He had thought back in Trost, or at least it felt like he had thought those thoughts, that he was so beyond those who gawked at him as he carried the Boulder to the ruined gate. That they were weak and inferior compared to him, who stood shoulder to shoulder with the Guardians. But that was stupid, the thoughts of a child who thought themselves better than they really were.
And that was the sum of it, right there.
Eren Yeager was a child, who foolishly thought he was more than he really was. Only his eyes were open now, despite how much he wanted them to be closed again.
And yet, try as he might, he couldn't get those earnest brown eyes out of his mind. Eyes that were worried for him, eyes that more than implied care for him.
With a weak curse, he got up and took the candle with him. Keeping it at arm's length, he made his way to the stairs of the basement and left it on the bottom step. He didn't plan to be gone long. Climbing up the stairs and silently opening the door, he slipped out.
As he expected, in contrast to his room, candles were burning strong in their holders throughout the hallway. As he made his way through the empty corridors, he was idly aware that there would more than likely be guards posted outside the main entrance of the castle. With that in mind, he made his way to one of the doors that would have him come out the back. No one would be there, he hoped. Just as he turned into the corridor that would have the door at the end, he stopped and practically jumped back around it.
Yin was there.
It had been brief, but Eren was certain it was him. He was, as the echoing sounds told him, walking towards the door. They stopped. There was an odd hum, the sound of a door opening, footsteps and then the sound of a door closing.
Once his heartbeat returned to its more pace, Eren looked over the corner to confirm that yes, Yin was gone. And for the briefest of moments, Eren thought only about retreating back to the basement and hide under the covers till morning.
But the thought was blown away by his overwhelming curiosity.
What was Yin doing up so late? Why had he gone outside? Didn't he sleep? Could he sleep? So many questions ran through Eren's mind and, before he knew it, he was at the door with his hands pushing the door opening. He looked out and saw that Yin was walking towards the forest, a retreating white figure against the dark of the night. As silently as he could, he pushed the door close behind him and followed, making sure to keep his steps light and his hero within eyesight. He moved faster once Yin's form vanished into the darkness of the forest.
It was a clear night with hardly any clouds in the sky to stop the moonlight from shining down onto the Earth. Because of this, the dark of the forest was illuminated enough by what light could get past the thick tree branches. Eren kept his distance from Yin, making sure that he was close enough to the trees so he could duck behind one if he needed to.
He tried, very much, to not feel like a child playing hide and seek.
Eventually, Yin made his way to a what appeared to be a clearing in the woods. Stopping behind a tree, Eren saw that it was a small patch of clear land where the trees did not grow, leaving a fine, voluminous circular area. With nothing to stop it, the moonlight was free to pour over the land and leave it in an ethereal glow.
Yin stood in the centre of the clearing and remained there, staring up at the night sky. Dressed in a plain set of nightclothes similar to his own, Eren noticed how he almost seemed to be glowing in the moonlight.
"I know you're there," Yin said, without moving, his voice ringing very clearly to Eren and making his blood turn to ice. He hid behind the tree, heart thumping in his chest. What a fool he had been! Of course he couldn't trail the White Guardian without being noticed, there was just no way! Eren heard some slight movement. Had Yin turned in his direction? "If you're planning to attack me, I would highly advise against it. So would you kindly come out before I destroy the area you're currently residing in."
It was less of a request and more of an order, with enough threat to give it meaning. Given the time and place, and the idea that perhaps he wanted to be alone, who could blame Yin?
So Eren did as he was asked. Taking a breath, he moved around the tree so he could be seen by Yin—
Whose eyes immediately widened in surprise at the sight of him. "Oh! Eren, it's you. So sorry, I thought you were someone else."
"It's fine," Eren was quite proud of how composed his voice was. He lowered his eyes away from the Guardian's, feeling a prickling sense of shame was over him. "I-I'm sorry for tailing you, Sir."
"That's quite alright." He didn't dare raise his head, but Eren was certain that he didn't imagine the smile in the older boy's voice. He heard him approach him, stopping once he was a few feet away. "I'm rather surprised that you're still up, considering you were with Hanji all of last night."
"So am I." The exhaustion was there, creeping at the corner of Eren mind like an illness, but he was somehow managing to put it away for the time being. He forced himself to meet Yin's eyes. "How did-?"
"I noticed you sometime after I woke up, though you didn't notice me. You looked like death. Plus, Petra told me."
"Ah, right." And just like that, the conversation came to an end. Looking to the ground again, Eren dared to speak. "I-I'm sorry for bothering you, Sir. I'll-"
"Josh."
"Huh?" Was Eren's intelligent response, unable to hide his bafflement as he stared at the White Guardian.
The boy regarded him softly, eyes as gentle as they were hours ago, hands linked behind his back. "I'm neither your superior, nor part of your military, Eren. So please, just call me Josh or Joshua. Whichever you prefer."
"A-ah! Right! Okay, J-josh..."
Yin-Josh-looked pleased, lips curling upwards slightly. "That's better. Now, seeing as how we're both awake, how would you like to watch the stars with me?"
It was asked so simply, so normally, yet they almost had Eren reeling. From either shock or elation, he couldn't tell. He didn't particularly care. "S-sure." He followed Joshua to the centre of the clearing, pausing just for a moment when the older boy sat down. He did the same, keeping a foot of distance between them. They both looked up at the inky black sky, glittering with stars and the full moon. After a few moments of comfortable silence, Eren found himself speaking. "I haven't...seen the stars since the night of my graduation."
"How long ago was that?" Josh asked.
It gave Eren a moment's pause when he realized that graduation had only been a week ago. Funny that, it felt like a lifetime. He told Josh this.
He hummed, nodding. "Whenever I can't sleep, I'd go out to look at the stars. Think things over. The last time I did was..." Josh paused and Eren looked at him to see his thoughtful expression. He then gave a small sound of amusement, a wan smile gracing his lips, "Lord, must have been before the final battle."
Something cold wiggled into Eren's chest. "The...final battle of your war?"
"Yes."
Eren remembered the trail, the one after his own, and remarked. "You said that your enemy sent you to this world, right?" A nod of confirmation. "Then is the war on your world over?"
"I would think so. In the end, he was all there was, the leader. Our ultimate enemy. His armies were destroyed to the last man, we left none alive. Our world is probably picking up the pieces. Our...comrades will also see to that."
"We didn't come here by choice." That is was Joshua had said in the Courtroom, voice hardened as he explained the reality of them being on their world. The cold feeling in Eren begun to fill his chest. "You're...stranded here?" He almost choked on his own words.
And to his dawning horror, Josh simply nodded. When he spoke, his voice was void of all emotion. "There is no possible way for me or Estevan to reopen a gateway from this world and our own. Such power is beyond us and could be fatal to use." When he seemed to notice that Eren was staring at him, he looked at him and something broke in Eren when he saw the resigned defeat in his brown eyes. "Yes, I'd say that we are."
"I-I'm sorry." Eren pulled his knees into his chest, looking away. "I-I didn't mean-"
"It's fine." The Guardian said, a touch sharply. "You didn't know."
Silence fell like a thick, choking blanket. Eren cursed himself to hell over and over again. "Well done Eren, gold star! You fucked that up royally, you stupid, stupid brat!"
Just as he was about to excuses himself, to spare the Guyver from suffering any further grievances from his own stupidity, Josh shredded the silence by speaking. His voice held not a hint of anger. "You never answered my question, you know."
Eren looked back at the older boy, baffled. "Question?"
Joshua, who was looking towards the darkness of the forest, uttered. "Are you alright, Eren?"
Eren's chest tightened. "I'm fine," He muttered, looking away again.
"We both know that's not true."
"But I am! Really, my wounds have healed-"
"Oh, I can clearly see that. Must be because of your Titan powers. And we both know that's not what I was referring to." His voice maddeningly calm.
It was strange, really. In place of what should have been defensive anger or bluntness, to push away those who got too close for his liking, there was only a growing sense of aching despair. What was happening? How was this happening? Eren found himself having to force his words out. "I'm...I'm fine."
"You don't have to lie to me, Eren." His voice was so gentle, in a way that reminded Eren of his mother. God, he missed her. He hadn't been able to see her after the trial, she had been denied to see him. He wished she was here, just to feel her arms wrap around him and encompass him in her warmth. He could feel Josh's eyes on him, watching him. "You can talk to me, honestly. Whatever's bothering you."
Something in Eren was rising, bubbling towards the surface, not anger. To his overwhelming horror, he realised that his eyes were watery. He raised his hands to his face, scrubbing away the swelling tears desperately before they had a chance to traitorously roll down his face. "Nothing's–" He breathed hoarsely and it was utterly sickening, he thought, how much he sounded like a petulant child.
And then, without hearing the prior movement, Joshua was next to him and had wrapped his arm around Eren's shoulder to pull him close. Something warm exploded messily inside Eren's chest and he stiffed before trying to move away. But the lone arm was firm and refused to let him go and Josh said soothingly, "It's okay, Eren."
It took Eren a second to realize that the contact had made him start to cry and rage flared so suddenly and violently that he was certain that he was going to turn into a Titan right then and there.
How could he be so blind, he wondered furiously. How could he not understand? Didn't the hero see that Eren didn't deserve this, wasn't allowed it? No matter how palpable his loneliness was, no matter how much he longed for someone to reach out and not draw back as though he was about to bite off their fingers, this was the last thing he deserved.
He was a monster, and monsters didn't deserve kindness.
And yet, Eren acknowledged as the rage drained away as quickly at it had flared, the person who was Guyver Yin didn't let go. Didn't look at him with hate or fear and was holding him in a genuine attempt to comfort him.
He cared.
Eren broke.
It happened beyond his control, without any transition of realization or dawning understanding, he stopped struggling and pushed his face deep into the older boy's chest. His body shook with the weight of all his pain, frustration and confusion and he was so glad his face couldn't be seen at the moment. He didn't want Joshua to see his face. There was, he found, something so cathartic about letting his grief out for a change instead of just hiding it under heaps of faux anger.
Why was it that only matters involving the Guyvers brought this out of him? Annie would be disappointed.
"Oh kid," Josh sounded as though he was in pain himself and Eren felt his hold on him tighten. His hand went from his shoulder to his head, fingers gently rubbing his scalp. Eren found himself curling just a little bit more into the hero's side.
For a while, there was nothing but them, the dark, and the moon.
Eren didn't how long it had been once he pulled away from Josh, but he reckoned it must have been a while by how conspicuous the tear stain was on his nightclothes. He rubbed his eyes, speaking lowly. "M'sorry..."
"Don't be," Josh replied immediately, seriously. He moved back a bit and Eren hated how he missed the contact. Now fully facing Eren with his legs drawn to his chest and chin resting on his chin, and almost perfect mirror of Eren's current position, he pinned the boy with an intense stare. "You had every right to be upset. It's good; means you're still human. That you can still feel." He grimaced, uttering gently. "What those men said to you...it hurt, right?"
That was but a small part of what had made Eren Yeager, the suicidal bastard of the 104th Training Corps, break down so spectacularly. He looked away and answered. "Yes."
Out of the corner of his eyes, he saw Josh look down himself. "...I should have done more than break his nose." His voice was quiet, thoughtful, and it sounded as though he was speaking it himself rather than Eren.
Eren shook his head. "It doesn't matter," He said tiredly.
"Yes, it does." It was a fairly mild night, Eren remembered with a shiver. And yet Joshua's voice, a glacial whisper, seemed to suck the warmth out of the area. Eren looked back at him, seeing his eyes still downcast. "They had no right to blame you for the deaths of those people who died beyond the Walls, Eren, their deaths weren't your fault. And to call you a freak-" The word was spat with disgust and Eren didn't miss the flicker of honest anger roll onto his face. It almost didn't fit, he thought. It would have looked more at home on his brother's face. It faded away as he continued bitterly. "They deserved worse for calling you such a thing, for hurting you, especially after all you did for them."
Eren sat quietly, regarding the other boy before him, considering what he could say next. Eventually, he asked, "Why do you do that?"
"Do what?"
"Make me out to be a hero? Like I saved Trost?"
"Because you did." Josh said this as though it were the most obvious thing in the world.
"But you and Yang-"
"Estevan and I fought off the Titans whilst you carried a boulder, twice the size of your Titan body, and blocked the hole in Trost's gate. You saved Trost, kid. All me and my brother did was back you up."
Eren shook his head again, smiling sadly. His eyes fell back to the spot between him and Josh. Both had a simple pair of slip-on shoes on their feet. "You don't have to do this."
"Do what?"
"Be so nice to me."
He felt the older boy's eyes on him. "What on Earth makes you think that I'm pretending?" He sounded baffled, perhaps even a little bit hurt.
"It doesn't matter what I think," Eren said, squeezing his eyes shut once he registered how much of a whine his words sounded. His eyes were sore. "No one cares, what does it matter what I do or think, only so long as I can...change." There wasn't a word Eren could think of that could justly describe his ability to turn into a Titan. He didn't want a word to describe his ability, despite how many apt words came to mind.
"...Well then," Josh spoke up after a small pause, voice hushed. Eren tried to imagine the face he was making. "It may come as a surprise to you, kid, but we do care about you. Me and my brother."
"Why?" And so, Eren expressed the main flaw with all his stupid childish dreams to one of the heroes that inspired said dreams. "I mean, you barely know me. You saved my life before, sure, but you barely know me. And you're- I mean..." He trailed off, too afraid to finish. There were so many words he could use to describe the Guyvers, but none that he could actually say to them face to face.
After an indiscernible amount of time, Joshua sighed and Eren opened his eyes when he heard the sound of rustling clothes. He raised his eyes to watch the older boy get to his feet, looking down at him. He was haloed by the moonlight, making it seem like he was glowing white. Rather fitting, all things considered. "Look at me, Eren." He said, spreading both arms out. "What do you see?"
"Joshua?" Eren furrowed his brows, confusion overtaking his pain. The hero was looking at him with an expression that spoke in infinite weariness. It made him look like an old man trapped in a boy's body.
"You see the same thing as everyone else, something that can do the impossible. Something more than human." With a sad sigh as his arms fell at his sides, Josh thickly spat the word that the legends about him as his brother had been built upon: "A God."
Eren's confusion mounted along with his interest. He wondered where was the White Guardian going with this.
"But I'm not a God, Eren. I'm just a kid with too much power." When Eren opened his mouth to counter this, to insist to the older boy that he was wrong to label himself as something so meagre, Josh raised a hand to stop him. "It's true, Eren. The Guyver is just a suit, a weapon. It isn't who I am. Sure, I can do things no normal human can, but that doesn't make me more than anyone else. I'm simply...powerful. Nothing more, nothing less.
"Who I am now, is someone who's...seen things. Things you people wouldn't believe. Things that defy rational thought. Both amazing and...terrifying." Eren didn't miss the momentary flash in Josh's eyes as he briefly looked away, hinting to some terrible memory. He didn't even bother to consider what kind of things could inspire such a look. Josh swallowed and continued, eyes moving above to look behind Eren as they went distant. "At my core, at the core of Guyver Yin, is someone who always tries to do the right thing. Someone who is able to find hope in even the darkest of situations.
"And to be honest I...didn't see much hope in this world when I first came to it. It seemed too far gone, too broken." His Earth brown eyes returned to Eren's emerald ones, firm and convinced. "That was before I saw you emerge from the neck of a Titan."
"What are you-?" Eren stared inconceivably at the older boy, his mind failing to understand the words pouring from his mouth.
Josh gave a soft, amused sound before spreading his arms wide. "Look around you, Eren." He instructed gently and the boy did so. He looked at the moonlit grass, the dry, cracked Earth and the darkness that the thick tree branches caused. "This is your world. This everything you know, everything you have, and everything you stand to lose. It's a bleak world, one can not deny, with hope practically non-existent among the people. The combined might of your Military doesn't have a chance of defeating the Titans, but we do. You, me and Estevan. We have the power, we have the commitment, we can do it.
"Together, we can save this world."
Eren blinked. Then blinked again, and once more. His brain took in the word and confirmed that yes, Guyver Yin believed that he could help them save the world. Eren shook his head. This was getting ridiculous now. "I can't..." He muttered, looking back down at the space between him and Josh.
"Can't what?"
"Help you."
"Why. Not?"
"BECAUSE I'M NOT LIKE YOU!" Eren roared, flying to his feet as anger shot through him with startling suddenness. His words echoed and were swallowed in the darkness surrounding the clearing. Joshua didn't so much as flinch, expression sad and questioning. Anger quickly turned into shame that made Eren lower his head. That was uncalled for, he knew. Josh had done nothing to warrant an outburst from him. "I...I only just gained this power and I barely understand how it works! I mean, with I do something wrong? What if everyone dies because of me?! What then?!"
"That won't happen," Josh said simply, quietly, each word like steel. "I know it won't."
"And what makes you think that?" Eren could hear the slight hysteria in his voice and hated it.
"Because me and Estevan will be there, by your side, every step of the way. Should, God forbid, something does go wrong, we'll figure something out. Or I will, rather." Josh stated, the last bit mumbled and spoken more to himself that to Eren. He then added softly. "And because we trust you."
Eren stared at him, trying to see a hint of doubt or lie in him. He waited for him look away and try and say something completely irrelevant to what he had been saying prior, to see the unease as though he were staring at a caged animal. An animal that would tear out his throat if he got too close.
He saw none of this. Joshua Martin had meant every word.
Eren deflated with a sigh, feeling the exhaustion sink its fangs deep into his brain. His eyes, still slightly sore, felt heavy. "I don't understand," He said, gazing tiredly at the older boy. He saw him raise a brow, question unsaid. "How can you trust me?"
"Like I said before, you saved Trost. You proved yourself to me, to us, ages ago, Eren. We know we can trust you, without a doubt. So do your sister and best friend." Josh gave a soft sound of amusement, smiling slightly as he eyes briefly dropped to the ground. They had a distant look in them again, recalling some fond memory, Eren bet. "Wars have been won on much, much less."
The older boy's smile grew as wide and as warm as a pair of outstretched arms as he refocused his attention to Eren again. "I would not ask if I did not believe, but I do. Estevan does too, you can be certain of that. So, what do you say, kid?
"Want to help us save the world?"
It was asked so casually, like something said between friends and Eren wondered if that was what they were now. He and the Guyvers, friends,
Childhood dream accomplished.
It occurred to Eren that Joshua wasn't ordering Eren, he was giving him a choice. He was offering Eren a chance to walk away, if that was what he wanted, without any threat to his words.
Eren wondered when was the last time he had been offered such a choice.
He also wondered if Josh seriously thought he was going to walk away.
Collecting himself, holding onto the warm feeling his chest and not letting it go, he said. "It would be my honour, Joshua."
The hero's smile turned into a full-blown grin, looking very pleased, eyes sparkling. "Excellent!" He crowed as he clapped his hands together, looking as though he wanted to start bouncing around the area.
Eren smiled, he couldn't help it-
-and promptly yawned.
He flushed when Josh's grin fell into a knowing, warm smile. "I think that's enough for one night. Time for bed! C'mon," He made his way over to Eren, making a gesture with his hand. "We'll have more time to talk in the morning." He promised.
Eren found he could believe that promise. "Right," He felt slightly breathless as he followed the hero, now walking side by side with him. Not as equals, he reminded himself firmly, but as friends. "Friends," He savoured the word, the elation of the warmth in his heart. And to think, he had been so worried for nothing.
They walked back to the castle, blanketed in a soothing silence, and suddenly Eren found himself looking forward to what the next day would bring.
Dull blue eyes watched the pair leave. The pair of kids.
After that little show, there was little doubt left in his mind that was what the two were. It was so easy for people, especially those who had been soldiers for as long as he had, to forget that everyone was young and stupid at some point. He had expected Yeager to be a bit messed up in the head, what with all the shit that had fallen onto him of late, but Yin—
Was that earnest young man, perhaps no more than two years older than Eren, really the White Guardian? Could one of the fable Heroes of the People really be this person who accepted Eren with open arms and believed in him so firmly?
If so, Levi thought, humanity was fucked right up the ass.
Sighing, the short man silently made his way back to the castle via his own route. He had gotten the layout and surrounded areas of the castle memorised the day they arrived.
Erwin will want to hear about this.
Wow. I just...wow.
This one really got away from me. Clocking in at over 30K words, barring the author notes, I certainly hope this makes up for the long wait. It's easily one of the longest chapters I've ever written.
Right then, as mentioned above, things to talk about:
I have a lot to thank for this second wind. Firstly, Abridged on Titan and A Slap on Titan by Reality Punch Studios and tomandre respectively. I can't recommend these shows enough. Seriously, these are awesome parody series! The latter in particular really helped with the humour of this chapter, and props to anyone who finds the reference.
I also had the luck of discovering writers Dorminchu, Sevlow and synergenic. I highly recommend these two as well, both brilliant writers whose work needs to be known. The former has written some of the best Attack On Titan stories I've ever read and the latter is quite famous for this superb Fullmetal Alchemist stories. He manages to take an anime and make it realistic, almost eerily so. If you're looking for truly gut-wrenching angst stories, even if you're not a fan of Fullmetal Alchemist, then look no further than Sevlow. You will not be disappointed. And finally, synergenic. There are no words that can describe how emotionally raw this stories are, how strongly they tug at your heart. His story "Après Toi" in particular is beautiful. It really helped me a lot with Eren's character.
Also, a huge shout out to melishade, author of the fantastic story Attack On Prime. My friend Asura94 introduced me to her and her dedication to continuing her story, despite the recent attacks she's suffered from some truly vile trolls, has earned my respect. I won't lie, her story helped me a lot in the shaping of this story. This chapter, in particular, owes a lot of thanks to her. Bollocks to the trolls and their drivel, her stories are awesome and she has my support.
Now, the last thing I promise, what's coming next. I'm back on this story and, as said above, want to see it finished. Work, as it happens, actually helped with writing. Minds more active, helped me churn out more ideas. I can't promise that the next chapter will be out in a week, but know that I am working hard on it. Two new chapters out before the year is done, that's my goal. Let's see if I can make it.
The chapters after the next will be sort of like filler, focusing less on action and more on character development. I've thought hard about this and I plan to include them in this story. It's safe to say that characterization was all over the place in the last few chapters, with me almost wishing to delete the previous chapters and rewrite them, so these next ones will focus on that. Also, which is my main goal for them, is to flesh out the Guyvers. They are not Marty Sues. These boys are flawed, they have limitations, and the next few chapters will offer hints into this. Don't worry if you fear there'll be many, I plan to do (at most) five or six before we get onto the expedition. It really depends on how much I want to cover.
Well, that's everything covered.
Please let me know if you think this was good or not and, until then, this is me signing off!
