Tied by Fate 8
A Coward's Way Out
"I think that I have fallen in love with you, Arthur"
After he said, that he left. Those words echoed in my head over and over, I haven't been able to get a good sleep since, and before I knew it; it was the last day before the wedding.
Everyone was scrambling to get things finished up, getting the house decorated, adding all the final touches on the dresses and tuxedoes. Francis finished the food planning and they're almost done with the baking. Someone else is dealing with the icing and decorations for the cake. Ms. Bonnefoy's dress is perfectly fine and thankfully the maid that spilled the coffee wasn't fired.
As for myself, my ankle doesn't hurt that much anymore, so I'm able to walk on it now. I would still want to use the crutch just to make sure that it was fully healed though, but I'm sick of using it.
I stood from my bed and got dressed in my usual: trousers, white shirt, sweater-vest and tie. I heard a knock at the door, I asked her to come in thinking that it was Lily, but it was another maid instead.
"A message from Mr. Bonnefoy, sir. He will be seeing you in the ball room this evening for some dance lessons."
"Alright, thank you" I answered. She bowed and left, closing the door gently behind her.
That reminds me, how do I feel about Francis? I sat on the bed and began to think about it. Well, when I'm around him a bit uneasy, I suppose, and I kind of get butterflies in my stomach when he smiles at me, I think. I lowered my head in shame for not being able to get a clear answer. How am I supposed to know what love is, I've never experienced it before, and why does it have to be with a man as well? I should fall in love with a woman, or something like that. I shook my head and stood up, I walked towards my needlework and continued where I stopped yesterday.
A few minutes later, I finally finished my handkerchief for Ms. Bonnefoy. As I stood, there was another knock on the door.
"Come in"
Lily walked in with my breakfast and placed everything on the table. "Sorry I'm late, everyone is so busy right now" she apologized.
"I imagine so" I laughed "Is everything going well so far?"
"Yes, everything is almost done being decorated and all the food is almost prepared. Ms. Bonnefoy is so nervous, she's been drinking tea since four in the morning" she giggled. "Oh but…I think there's something wrong with Francis"
"Is there?" I asked nervously.
"He seems really stressed and I don't think it has anything to do with the wedding, well at least I don't think so…"
I trembled slightly "I see"
"You know, usually when something is wrong Francis will tell everyone what's going on, that's just the kind of person that he is, but…" she paused " I'm worried, as well as everyone else, he won't say what's wrong." She sighed "Francis may seem very bold with his words and actions, but he's a coward, he fell in love with one girl, and he was so afraid of her rejecting him that he dumped her." She sighed, "Oh I'm sorry, I said some unnecessary things, I apologize"
"It's alright, I'll talk with him later and see if he can tell me" I smiled.
Lily told me that she had other things to attend to, so she would pick up the dishes sometime later. I sat in the chair staring at the wonderful food before me only to be sick to my stomach. I'm too worried about Francis to eat after what she said to me, I should think really carefully about this. How could someone fall in love so quickly, and how do I really feel about him? I couldn't bear to eat right now, I stood from my seat and left to take a cold shower and calm myself down as well as think. The cold water felt nice on my slightly feverish skin as it dripped down my body.
Usually when people are in love they want to touch each other, so if Francis were to touch me, would I like it? I exhaled and closed my eyes, I imagined Francis standing behind me, smoothly wrapping his arms around my waist as I felt his breath against my neck. He lightly kissed my shoulder as one of his hands slowly slid up to my chest while the other went lower and lightly stroked my member. My breathing became heavy as my heartbeat quickened while he slid his fingers over one of my nipples. Using his tongue, he licked across my shoulder and up my neck causing my to moan.
My eyes shot open as I shook myself out of my strange imagination. What the bloody hell was I doing, and why am I hard!? I turned off the shower and quickly dried myself off, and got dressed then laid down on the bed.
"There must be something wrong with me…" I said to myself. Even though it was my own imagination, where ever he touched was still hot. Wait a minute, does that mean that I'm sexually attracted him? Great now I'm even more confused, I'll go walk around. I finished Ms. Bonnefoy's handkerchief so I may as well give it to her.
I stood up feeling slightly dizzy, but I shook it off and walked out of my room shutting the door behind me. I tried my best not to laugh at everyone scurrying around nearly tripping on their own feet. I don't think I have ever been in Ms. Bonnefoy's room; I stopped in front of her door and knocked. I heard a quiet "Come in", so I let myself into her room. I walked into her room slowly while being amazed that everything in her room must have cost thousands. "Oh hello Arthur! Your walking normally again, that's wonderful!"
"Ah, yes it is" I nervously walked up to her and handed her the handkerchief that I had made. "You don't have to keep it if you don't want it, but I thought that it would go well with your wedding dress, that's all" This was more embarrassing then I thought it was.
She stood up and gave me a very tight hug "Arthur, that's so sweet! Thank you so much" she took the handkerchief and gently folded it and placed it on her dresser.
"Umm…Ms. Bonnefoy?" My voice shook slightly.
"What is it, Arthur?"
"Well…how do you know if you're in love with someone?" I asked quietly
"Hmm, well it's different for everyone, but for me…when I'm with someone I love, at first my heart will beat really fast when I'm looking at him, and when he looks into my eyes my heart beats are like lightning causing my body to shake. Then when he kisses me, I'm swept away by him completely, and I feel as though it's just him, myself and no one else in the world when we dance together" she explained.
"Hmm… I see, thank you very much" I quietly closed the door and made my way back to my room. As I opened the door to my room, I noticed that Francis was inside.
"Francis, what are you doing here?"
"Oh Arthur, I was waiting for you. Lily said that you didn't eat your breakfast so she was worried."
"I wasn't hungry for some reason"
"I see" Francis sighed "By the way, there is a bit of a decoration mishap in the ball room, so I wont be able to help you practice in there, so we will be doing it in here"
"W-what, right now?!" I backed up slightly.
"Of course" He grabbed my wrist and pulled me towards him, then quickly wrapped his arm around my waist. "I hope you're ready~" He winked.
An embarrassingly red blush spread across my face, as my body was pressed closer to his. "Why can't I just skip the dancing?" I spoke quietly.
"Don't be ridiculous, every gentleman must know how to dance" he smiled. "Let's start on the left foot now, ok?"
I nodded and nervously followed along "Why do you have to lead?"
He chuckled "Because I'm taller, and you will be dancing with me tomorrow. It's also better for me to lead so that I could teach you better"
"W-what, In front of a bunch of people?!"
"Of course" he smiled
"I refuse," I said bluntly
"How mean" he laughed. "It's fine, place your free hand on my shoulder"
"Stupid git" I mumbled as I did what I was told.
Francis started; he quietly began counting 1-2-3 after each step. "You're doing pretty good, but your supposed to look at your partner while dancing" he chuckled.
"As if I could do that, you git," I continued refusing to give him eye contact. My heart began beating faster for some reason; it was getting hard to breath.
"If you don't, I will do something really embarrassing" he smirked.
I huffed in refusal, than suddenly I was dipped backwards, I shut my eyes and wrapped both my arms around his neck, holding onto the back of his shirt. When I opened my eyes again I was staring into deep blue orbs that were staring back. My heart felt like it was going to explode, I can't breath, and I feel so hot. We stood still for a few seconds, which felt like hours. Francis's expression before was cheerful, and it now changed to something I couldn't quite read, an expression of longing, lust? Or was it love?
"…Arthur" He spoke so quietly.
The ocean blue eyes were moving in closer, I unconsciously loosened my grip from his shirt as I began to lose myself. I began to close my eyes as I could feel his lips begin to press against mine.
A knock was heard from the door snapping us out of our current moods. I quickly placed my hands on Francis's shoulders lightly pushing him away. "Who is it?" I asked.
"I apologize if I am interrupting anything, Sirs" Lily spoke. "I brought the snacks that you asked for Mr. Bonnefoy"
"Ahh right, thank you" he smiled
"Umm Mr. Kirkland, are you alright?" She asked concernedly
"I-I'm alright" as I said that my vision began to blur for a moment as I began feeling dizzy again.
"Arthur, are you feeling ok?" Francis moved a hand up to my forehead "Arthur, you're hot!"
Lily ran over putting her hand on my forehead as well "I'll get some water and medicine, Francis you have to undress him or he'll overheat" With that said, she ran out the door.
I coughed nervously "I can undress myself" I told him as I walked toward the bed.
As I took another step I lost my strength and collapsed, but Francis caught be before I hit the floor. "Don't be ridiculous, you can't even walk" He picked me up and placed me onto the bed. As he climbed onto the bed, he looked at me with a nervous look and then I realized what kind of a situation I was in. "Umm, Arthur" his voice shook.
I let out a shaky sigh "It's fine, just hurry up" As he took off my sweater vest and began to undo my tie I felt so hot. "I think I'm going to pass out"
"Please relax, Lily will be back soon." He began slowly undoing the buttons on my white shirt. As much as I wanted to stop him from doing that, I didn't have the strength. I turned my head to the side and closed my eyes, hoping that he would be done soon. "I'm sorry, Arthur"
"Sorry for what" I asked.
"I should have noticed that you were sick before we started dancing"
"Don't be ridiculous, even I didn't notice the signs"
"Umm about yesterday…" he began "Can I have your answer now?"
"U-uum…well…I…" my voice began to shake.
"You don't have to if you don't want to Arthur, I'll be alright with the relationship that we had before, I don't want to cause you any trouble"
"Huh?" I replied quietly
"I'm sorry for being selfish." He slid off the bed "I hope you feel better by tomorrow" The door opened and Lily came inside with water, and medicine then Francis quickly walked out.
I lay there is confusion, it happened way too fast for me too keep up. I recalled what Lily told me earlier "He fell in love with one girl, and he was so afraid of her rejecting him that he dumped her"
He took the coward's way out, I thought to myself. I felt a cold cloth over my forehead then Lily turned her back to prepare the medicine.
I was going to tell you that I loved you, stupid git.
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Author Comments:
I apologize for the grammar mistakes if i end up making any! I still have to fix the grammar in chapter 7 XD
sorry i re-read it and i didn't notice anything. so i'll look at it again and fix it when i have time. I'm not very good at grammar, sorry XD
anyway, climax chapter next! im so excited, its gonna be magical and romantic! X3
and i plan on introducing the M rated sexyness next so, BOOYAH! XD
and i apologize if i dont write much, the next chapter will be long, i promise! unfortunately that also means that it's gonna take a long time to write XD damn it.
i got college homework today too, so i'll watch out for the homework pile up. As much as i would love to set my writing as top priority, homework is more important XD
PS. after this story im gonna write a USUK, but that wont be for a long while because this series is quite long XD
