Zuko
Hiccup is the Night fury. The throat-slitting, mother-f*cking Night Fury. The f*cking serial killer. I let my best friend date a serial killer and he was probably going to get murdered. All. My. Fault. I hate myself. How could I have been so stupid to let Jack date someone that didn't seem right. Someone I knew was dangerous and no good. And now turned out to be a f*cking homicidal psychopath. Kind of like my sister, except she hasn't actually killed a person yet, though she's tried killing me multiple times.
Jack
It's not right. How the f*ck can Hiccup watch every single f*cking horror movie in existence and smile. That shouldn't be humanly possible. He even laughed when people get brutally and graphically killed, he was practically more scary than the movies themselves.
Mitch
Jack is dating a serial killer. Holy sh#t. What is the world coming to? I'd like to keep my best friends, thank you. Stupid world. You should understand. And better yet, listen.
