Ja, as so I don't own anything Hellsing.
Hellsing
Integra's office
3:10 p.m
Hellsing Manor.
It had been three days since the incident and tension in the Hellsing household was near breaking point. No matter what gentle coaxing Walter used, he could not get a word out of Sir Hellsing as to what exactly happened between Master and Servant that day. Whether it was a warm cup of cocoa or a generous glass of brandy, or simply his company, her lips were sealed and her mood stayed dour. The barest infraction brought on a fit of temper, the housestaf's nerves were frayed and they went to great lengths to avoid her piercing gaze. In various acts of desperation, frightened maids and clerics would either conceal themselves in doorways, hide behind exotic potted plants, or in some cases even jump inside cupboards whenever Sir Hellsing was nearby. Even the fiercest military commanders and captains treaded carefully in her presence. To all it was an absolute mystery as to what had gotten the Boss so riled up. Some whispered that it was the Vatican, others said she was overdue a holiday, and some men with knowing smiles said it was probably that time of the month, stating that for all Sir Hellsing's denial of her gender, she can't deny her nature. It was hell on Walter. The butler divided his time into either consoling crying maids and administrators, placating the research branch not to sue and talking courage into soldiers turned blubbering idiots just from a mere glare.
Meanwhile Integra threw herself into her work, only eating and sleeping when she had to. Subsequently, she had lost some weight and turned into a thinner, grimmer version of herself. She still hadn't allowed Alucard near her. Although being denied her presence was torture to the No-Life King, the vampire was currently content to merely to watch the after-effects of their encounter and consequently stayed aloof. She had started to mentally refer to their encounter as that day. And that day festered in her like a raw and gaping wound. She knew that it would remain so for a long time yet, and these feelings of humiliation and pain would probably accompany her for the rest of her life. If he doesn't do something ten times worse by then! Integra had to use all her self-control to refrain from scratching where her pet bit her. Truly, Alucard is the epitomy of the dog that would bite its master's hand. Her head and the hollow of her shoulder seemed to throb with the single pulsating beat of her heart. Integra frowned and bit her lip in consternation as rain clouds gathered.
Lately, the little hours of the night were a trying time for Sir Hellsing. To her, climbing into bed and falling asleep was always a blissful moment of peaceful surrender, but now unbidden recollections of a smudged pentagram would often result in no sleep at all. It was at times such as these that she would fervently wish for a confidant, be it friend or lover. It was especially in the small hours of the morning, when Hellsing underwent a strange lull in activity with the rising of the sun, that Integra felt most alone and craved that her self-imposed solitude be viciously broken. To allow herself the simple pleasure of being close to somebody, to be held and loved for who she was and not for her position of power and wealth. To simply be human and loose herself in the trivial things that other humans do.
Memories of the Vampire King's hands on her breasts, belly and thighs returned.
Lord, I would pay a small fortune just to be able to forget.
She could still feel his teeth digging into her shoulder and his fingers on her cunt. And how that day ended with her disgraced form in Walter's gentle embrace. A Truly perverted sexual encounter. Every time she remembered that bitter release: of her holding onto Walter for dear life and his ever-worried face, it resulted in a flush of shame on her cheeks and a knot in her stomach.
Warmth enveloped her hands. She looked up as the sun peeked from heavy, grey clouds letting a few stray rays stream into her office through plate glass windows. She turned her head away and swallowed, only to bury it in her hands.
God, how am I going to live this down? I can't deal with Leonard's pity nor Walter's incessant questioning and these murders. . .
A timid knock interrupted Integra's thoughts, she vaguely wondered who it could be. She immediately schooled her features and bade them:
"Enter."
Hellsing
Outside Integra's office
3:30 p.m
Hellsing Manor.
Ceras Victoria heard the soft call on the other side of the door and apprehension instantly settled in her gut. Currently, most staff members wouldn't touch Sir Hellsing with a ten-foot pole. The house staff practically bribed, begged and pleaded Walter not to allow them near her. Especially since her last personal clerk was sent to a specialised government retreat after suffering a severe breakdown. Poor Johnston, he really didn't deserve what happened to him. Ceras wondered if Integra's recent behaviour had anything to do with a strange dream she experienced three days ago. But she couldn't see how Integra would ever place herself in such a position. Then again Master is happy and Sir Hellsing is pissed. She shaked her head and sighed. Just ignore it Ceras! It has nothing to do with you. She furiously hoped that she wasn't going to be yelled at, laughed at, or ridiculed and that her request would at least be met with some sympathy. She must've cooled off by now, and besides. . . I'm already dead so what's the worst that can happen?
Ceras reflected that she and Sir Hellsing never shared words; in the few months she's been here Integra practically ignored her. She only saw her at debriefings or when she was issued orders, and in most cases Walter was the go-between that linked them. Ceras always thought she saw a look of disdain in Sir Hellsing's eyes, and sometimes something else, some hint of other emotion when Integra was dealing with her. Although Hellsing's enigmatic employer stayed aloof, Ceras often got a strange sense of the woman from her master. Like now for instance, she felt vestiges of Integra's emotional state through her bond with Alucard, and therefore knew that her master's master was in a state of turmoil and deeply troubled. Now might not be the best time.
Ceras found a very stern-looking Integra sitting behind her desk busy with paperwork, a lost ray of light turning her hair golden in the gloomy office. The Policegirl gave a brisk salute and stood to attention. When Sir Hellsing finally looked up, Ceras could see a slight flush of red on her cheeks. This slight dishevelment soon disappeared as her employers assumed the role of leadership. Integra's keen gaze ticked away into uncomfortable minutes, Ceras grew fidgety under the intense scrutiny. She became painfully aware of her panty riding up her arse and wished to God she could quickly pull it right again. She blushed, in current company, however, that would be disastrous.
" What do you want officer Victoria?"
Ceras forced herself to meet her boss's steely blue gaze. Seconds ticked away. She cleared her throat as her mouth turned dry. Battling ghouls and killing vampires was a cup of tea in comparison to confronting her employer. She gave a small cough and averted her gaze, the floor suddenly holding a great deal of interest indeed.
" Well, Sir . . . You know how you said that if I were having any problems or experiencing difficulties that I was to report to you. I am . . .um, I . . Something kind of happened and I . . .I , . ."
The words slowly died in her mouth as Ceras sensed a rising state of fury in Integra. She looked up and abruptly wished she could join Johnston at that government retreat, that she could be anywhere except in a gloomy office opposite a pale faced and angry Hellsing.
" What is it Victoria? What did Alucard do now?" came a cold, harsh question.
It suddenly occurred to Ceras that she was a vampire employed by a vampire-hunting organisation, ruled by one Integra Fairbrook Wingates Hellsing, a cold-hearted bitch of note. Who could on whim easily order her disappearance, or ask Walter to dispose of me as he sees fit. And she'll ask him rather than order him because they've been chums for so long and that's the extent of her humanity! Master and Lord Hellsing deserve each other!
A chair scraped on tiles as Sir Hellsing swiftly stood. She ungraciously slammed her fist against her desk as paperwork tumbled to the floor.
"Out with it vampire! What did your master do?!!"
Ceras's position suddenly seemed terribly precarious to herself as irrational fear filled her. She took a step back as scenarios of her imminent demise played across her mind. She tried to swallow, to say something, but her tongue hung thick and heavy in her mouth.
Angry movements punctuated the Hellsing's bearing. She pointed a trembling finger at the Draculina " Has he destroyed another wing? Defiled my carpets? Desecrated my personal belongings?!"
Ceras was struck speechless by this raging figure. Sir Hellsing threw her arms into the air.
" SO HELP ME GOD, IF THAT BASTARD HAS RIFLED THROUGH THE QUEEN'S UNDERWEAR DRAWER AGAIN, OR TAKEN THE TANK OUT FOR A SPIN! I WILL NAIL HIS UNDEAD BALLS TO THE ALTER OF MY CHAPEL!!!"
Silence ensued as Integra leaned heavily on her desk, spent. She eyed Ceras from underneath golden brows.
"Noooo! No, No Sir! It was nothing like that. Master didn't do anything! I just, I kind of made a mess in my room. But it's not as if a dungeon can get anymore dirty, right?", Ceras knew she was babbling, but couldn't stop. Her brain was taking a holiday from its higher functions and her body was gesturing like the village idiot. " It's my courtres Sir, I was wondering if I could bring in a few personal belongings, brighten the place up a bit. Not that I don't like the cold, damp walls and the icy floors. It really goes well with the whole 'dead' thing. Not that I am complaining about being dead, its been really interesting and unexpected! And boy was I surprised, I suppose I still am, ha ha ha! Master really hasn't done any of those things! I just came to ask for your permission. I mean, I know its my room, but its kind of your manor, Sir.. . um."
Sir Integra frowned, a look of open confusion crossing her features. She wearily sat down as understanding slowly dawned. Outside, the sky broke and heavy rains pelted down, drenching the earth in moisture.
" Let me get this straight, you came here merely wanting permission to embellish your rooms? You really chose a bad day for it Victioria, you do know that."
Ceras smiled apologetically, " Well Sir, I just. . ."
" You just what?" came a bitter question.
Sudden annoyance blossomed in Integra.
" While Hellsing is still crippled and I am being harassed by the Round Table, and have to deal with all of this," Sir Hellsing gestured at her large stack of disorderly papers, " not to mention an outbreak of mysterious murders, you came to ask me, to ask me! something so trivial? What do you want to do? Bring in grandma's quilt, add a little bit of colour, a nice vase perhaps?! You're a vampire Policegirl! Start acting like one!!"
" Just because I am a vampire, doesn't mean I wasn't human once!"
Silence ensued.
Ceras's little outburst left her feeling deflated. A tiny flame of anger still spluttered in her chest. Integra wore a look of muted surprise. Probably never though little, ole me could blow a fuse!
" I . . . I apologise Sir, I, I didn't mean to. . ."
Integra leaned back in her chair, removed her glasses and massaged her temples. Ceras was surprised at how such a simple act softened Sir Hellsing's features. Ice-blue orbs focussed on the blurry image of the little Draculina. Great Integra, just wonderful. Push everybody away that are willing to come close to you. . . Is this what you wanted monster? To keep me all to yourself? She knew her thoughts were wandering, but these last days seemed to be filled with introspection. Dangerous and unnecessary distractions I can ill afford.
" I don't care Policegirl " , came a voice of tired resignation " it's your rooms, do whatever you want. Ask Walter to help you. Tell him I've given you permission to use the credit card. Just don't bother me with such an insignificant matter again. Dismissed."
" Yess, Sir. Um, thank you Sir."
Ceras didn't know if she should feel relieved or worried. Lets just get outta here! She hurried towards freedom, but her footsteps sounded tinny to her own ears and the door seemed leagues away. A sense of gloom and longing lingered in the office. Longing for what, Ceras did not know. She looked up and saw the sad eyes of Arthur Hellsing staring down at her from the wall. To think that Integra lived under that sorrowful gaze everyday left a sour taste in Ceras's mouth. She was almost at the door when a soft whisper fell on her ears. Words exhaled on a mere breath, not meant for human ears, it chilled Ceras to the bone
" You know what Alucard did to me, don't you Victoria?"
Ceras gulped.
" You're Master is the sort to share his victories."
She didn't want to turn around.
" It's not something he would keep from his fledgling."
"A victory Integra?"
"I never thought you would admit defeat."
"You flatter me Master."
"SHUT UP MONSTER!"
Demonic laughter filled the room.
" Master, Master showed me in a dream! I. . . I thought it was just a dream." Ceras finished lamely.
She couldn't look Integra in the eyes and ended up staring morosely at the chequered floor. She heard a slight shuffling as Sir Hellsing leaned forward, an emotionless voice continued.
" Need I remind you officer Victoria that the matter is strictly confidential? That if you were to share the content of your dream with either Walter or Leonard, or anybody for that matter, I would consider it a breach of my personal privacy."
" Oh, no Sir! I would never !"
Integra leaned back, placing her glasses on her nose with a patrician-like gesture. Ceras just wanted to get out. She took hold of the doorknob, but it slipped through her sweaty palms.
"Ceras?"
It was the first time Integra had ever used her real name. With shuffling feet, the little Draculina slowly turned around, but refused to look at Integra.
" Look at me."
She haltingly met her employer's gaze and was confused by the worry she saw there.
" Alucard hasn't . . . harmed you, in any way? "
Ceras had never seen Sir Hellsing look so fragile and insecure. She never thought that Master's Master would actually be concerned for her, would be willing to hold a protecting hand over her against Alucard. She's probably been doing so the whole time and I've just been enough of a dodo not to realise it.
Ceras gave Integra a small smile.
" Apart from turning me into one of the undead, No Sir."
" Good."
Ceras opened the door and left Lord Hellsing to her own devices. Well, she got what she wanted, but really not in the way I wanted it. Nothing is ever easy with Sir Hellsing.
She ambled listlessly towards the kitchens, wondering what Walter and Leonard's thoughts would be on interior decoration. Because I'm sure as hell not gonna ask Master!
Howzit, what a difficult chapter to write! But' I thought I should go a bit into Integra's mental state, how she was dealing with the situation etc. I hope I don't portray her as too cold, but I think she is tough and she is kind of removed, because of her relationship with Alucard and all her duties, however small glimmers of warmth do shine through.
