Down the Rabbit Hole Chapter 8 – And Call Alice, When She was Just Small

Edd busied himself helping Betty Jo by folding the laundry while the woman was running around the house making out the shopping list for the grocery trip she was about to undertake. He was grateful that today was the last day of his suspension from school and that he could finally get away from these four walls tomorrow. There would also be no more extra chores for him to do around the house anymore, it would mean that he was back to concentrating on his studies. "Edd can you think of anything else we might need from the store?" Betty Jo called out to him from the kitchen.

"Do you have juices on that list?" He replied remembering that they were almost out.

Her voice slowly came closer to him as she talked, "Yes along with fruit, cereal, yogurt, toilet paper," walking into the laundry room she passes him the list, "Here, take a look and tell me if there is anything extra you might want or something you think we might need?"

Taking the piece of paper from her he examines it for a moment while humming to himself as he thought it over, "Nope looks like you got it all covered."

Passing it back to her she turns around quickly, being in a rush to get this trip over with, "Alright," she walks back into the kitchen to get her purse and coat, "I'm going then, I should be back in about an hour. You be good," she called out and pointed at him as she passed the laundry room, heading towards the back door.

Perking up her ears, she listened for the door to close behind her, putting the current item of clothing she was folding in the basket she quickly made her way to the door to look out it's small window. She watched intently as Betty Jo made her way across the yard and around the swimming pool then out the back gate to her car. Hearing her car engine, which was badly in need of some repair work, she runs back to the laundry room and grabs the basket of clothes, then heads stairs to put the items away. She deposited a few towels in each bathroom before putting the rest in the hall closet then sorting out and placing the family's unmentionables where they belonged. Looking through her mother's closet she peruses a few of her latest purchases, all of which were a little too conservative for her taste at the moment, maybe it was just a grown up thing to try and dress like Nancy Reagan, she didn't know. But she was most certain she would never understand her mother's taste in clothes, I mean really a turtle neck dress shirt.

"Oh wait what do we have here," she mused as she pulled the grey dress suit from the rack to get a better look at it. "Less Nancy and more Jackie-O I'd say," stepping out of the closet she hangs the suit on one of the wooden legs that supported the full length mirror in the corner of her parent's room. Pulling the beanie on top her head off, she let her long wavy locks fall free. Grabbing a hair brush from her mother's vanity table, she brushes her hair out, bringing it back to a smoother silky look. Her ebony locks had grown over the past few years to fall just below her shoulders and frame her face.

Picking up the hanger off the wooden leg, she holds the suit up against her chest as she visualized herself wearing it. Not daring to actually take the time to put the outfit on, as the fear of discovery is always a concern, and who really knew when someone would actually come home for the day. Letting her imagination run wild for a moment, she envisioned herself sitting behind a fancy desk in some high-rise office dictating notes to her assistant, some hot toned nameless man that she was probably having a scandalous affair with. Or having breakfast at Tiffany's with one of her important client as they discussed a business deal that could bank them both millions, or entering some unnamed corporate boardroom to tell the members of the board that they shouldn't fuck with her, fella's.

Each dream had one thing missing however, a name, this was something that she had been thinking about for quite some time now. In an attempt to find a name that she likes she has been trying out a few of the nicer ones in front of the mirror in her bathroom. She had already chosen to keep her middle name, with just a little change in the spelling, instead of being Marion it would now be Marian, so in addition, the new first name needed to fit well with it. Debora she asked herself in the mirror, no she didn't look like a Debora, Stephanie, no that's to much like Steven. Britany, no, Connie, no, Daffney nope, and this is how the list has been going for some time now. She knew that the name for her true self was out there, she just needed to find the one that fit who she knew she was, she just needed to give it time, it would eventually come to her.

"Edd," the all too familiar name being called out snapped her out of her daydreams and contemplations.

Putting the wall back up he rushes to the closet and puts the suit back in where it had once been, "I'm up here Marie," he calls toward the open bedroom door as he closed the closet.

He could hear her footsteps coming up the stairs and down the hall toward him, picking up the laundry basket from the bed, he exits the room to meet her in the hall. Her eyes shooting up to the top his head as she greeted him, "Wow dude." In his rush to put thing away he had forgotten to grab his beanie and place it back where it had never failed to be since he was a small child, the top of his head.

He was now extremely aware of his hair and the way he had brushed it, a small irrational fear of discovery nagged him in the back of his mind. Did his hair make him look more feminine and would that coupled with any other tale tell signs give his secret away to her? Quickly pushing that thought away as just being overly paranoid he cocks a brow at her, "What?"

"Your hairs rockin," A deep smile crossing her face as ideas sprang into her mind, "You should so totally let me style it sometime."

Shaking his head, he walks past her, "Not going to happen, there is no way in hell I would ever let you give me a Mohawk." Turning back around to face her, "I'll be right back," he raises the laundry basket to display his reasons, "You can wait for me in my room." Heading back down the steps he hears the door to his room open up down the hall and within a few seconds his small boom box began to blare out Alice in Chains. Placing the basket back under the laundry chute he turns back around and heads into the kitchen to gets his friend a soda from the refrigerator and himself a glass of apple juice.

Walking back into his room, after retrieving his beanie, he kicks the door closed and sees her laying on his bed with her head hanging over the edge her legs crossed and propped up on the wall while she read the latest issue of Hit Parader. Handing her the can of soda she gives him her thanks and rolls over to sit up properly, he sits down beside her and leans against the wall. "So," he takes a sip of his juice, "What's up? Couldn't stand another moment away from me?"

"Figured you could use the company, and moms gone so here I am," she gestured with both her arms as though presenting herself to him.

"I see," snatching the magazine from her he flips through it, seeing the usual articles on popular artists as well as up and coming new comers to the industry. Most of whom he was sure would only last for one big hit in the main stream media, and if they were any good would require him to do some digging to find any other work they might have produced. "I'm curious about something," he says still keeping his eyes on the magazine, she hummed to acknowledge that she was listening as she flipped through Metal Edge.

"Do you have any idea what's going on between Rave and Kevin?" Not that it was really any of his business, but one can't help but wonder about these things, especially when it concerns two of your friends.

"Nothing's really going on between them as far as I know, they just talked for a long time after you fell asleep Saturday night." She puts down the magazine into her lap, "Though I will say they seemed to be in their own little world, and I think our dear Rave has become just the tinniest bit smitten with the boy."

Plank's theory that Kevin might be homosexual or at least bisexual was nagging him, "What about Kevin, did he seem to be reciprocating these feelings?"

She scrunched up her nose as she thought about it for a second then brought the magazine back up, "Nothing that would say he bats for your team, but he did seem chummy with him."

"Chummy?"

"Yeah, you know doing those butch kind of things boys do together, though it's hard to put the dork on the same level as let's say a football player when it comes to these things."

"Please elaborate your meaning," he asks as he gave her a sideways glance out of the corner of his eye with a cocked brow.

"Well like wrestling, you see two jocks doing it and it just oozes testosterone, but a dork like Kevin does it and not so much," she gestured with her fingers negatively as she continued to hold on to what she was reading. "Though," she releases one side of the magazine and taps the side of her mouth with her forefinger, "These kinds of things do seem like some sort of an excuse for boys to be able to touch each other, in my opinion."

He hums in response as though contemplating, "So what were these butch kind of things that the boys were doing?"

"You know, punching each other in the arm, head locks, rough housing those kinds of things," she flips a few pages, "Rave seemed to be enjoying it though."

"But still no proof that Kevin was into it on the same level as him," why was he so intrigued by knowing whether or not Kevin is into boys? Probably just needing to confirm or deny that there was at least one more person in his small school that society deemed as an outcast, an alley per say.

"Nope, no concrete evidence on that front," she looks intently at one of the many photo shoots contained in the magazine. "Then again he might just be figuring that part of himself out, you know the whole 'who in the world am I?' you know the great puzzle as Alice says."

"Alice?"

She dropped the magazine and turns to look at him with a surprised look on her face, "Alice as in Alice in Wonderland. You mean to tell me you haven't read it?"

"It's on my list of things to do, just haven't gotten around to it yet," he looked like a scolded dog at the moment.

"I highly suggest it my friend, I'm certain you'll enjoy it, it's right up your alley."

"Thank you for the suggestion, Marie, I'll make it a top priority on my list of things to do," he contemplated all that they had talked about, though it was mostly trivial gossip. But in the back of her mind she was going over that name, Alice Marian Rockwell, trying to decide whether or not she liked it and if it suited her.