Open Wounds
~So Break Yourself Against My Stones
And Spit Your Pity In My Soul
You Never Needed Any Help
You Sold Me Out To Save Yourself
And I Won't Listen To Your Shame
You Ran Away - You're All The Same
Angels Lie To Keep Control...
My Love Was Punished Long Ago
If You Still Care, Don't Ever Let Me Know
If you still care, don't ever let me know...~
I shoved Karin off of me as I wiped my mouth. "WHAT THE FUCK!"
"I know you want me Sasuke."
"NO I DON'T! GET THE HELL OUT OF MY LIFE!"
Turning around I saw Sakura run out the door with tears streaming down her face. My eyes widened as I made a move to go after her but Karin grabbed my arm again. I turned angrily to her as I gave a low growl. I wasn't in the mood to put up with her shit, she's already got Sakura crying from the stupid stunt she pulled just now.
"GET YOUR FUCKING HANDS OFF OF ME!" I yelled at her, "WHAT PART OF I DON'T LOVE YOU ANYMORE DON'T YOU GET?!"
"BECAUSE I KNOW THAT YOU LOVE ME!"
I didn't notice before but our yelling had caught everyone's attention, and Juugo was trying to make his way through the crowd of people to reach me. I glared at Karin as she flinched and dropped the grip she had on my arm. Her eyes showed the fear, the fear that she knew I didn't love her anymore. She just doesn't want to let me go, but I let her go the day I left.
There were no feelings that lingered in my heart for her. They were all for Sakura and I was afraid that she wouldn't forgive me for this, even if it wasn't my fault. I can't let Sakura go, I have to stop her, this isn't how I wanted it to be.
"You're ruining everything Karin," I grumbled as my hair shadowed my eyes, "Do me a favor and leave me alone."
Not wasting another second I ran towards the door of the nightclub, Juugo had turned to follow me but he still had a bunch of people to get passed before he would be able to reach me and head outside, which was where I was going.
I burst through the door and glanced back and forth between the two directions. I spotted Sakura getting into a car that was being driven by Ino, I think Naruto and Hinata are in the back seats, she must have called them when I was inside yelling at Karin. Sprinting over to them, I tried to talk to her through the open window on her side. Naruto immediately opened his door and got out.
He was looking really pissed at this point, the anger I saw in his eyes and the glare I saw etched onto his face told me he wasn't happy at all. This was a real shock to me, he seemed like he was always the happy guy, but this was a new side to him that I have never seen before. But really shocked me was what he did next, and I would have never expected this from him.
"You fucking bastard." He punched me roughly on my cheek causing me to stumble back.
"Sakura listen to me." I dodged another of his punches as I tried to talk to her but she only ignored me.
"I don't want to listen to you, just go back to your girlfriend and leave me alone." She muttered angrily as she put on her seat belt. "Naruto get back in the car.
"I better not catch you near her again." Naruto threatened me before he reluctantly got back into the car, I've never seen him so serious about anything, and he was mad at me for something I didn't even do.
Ino gave me a glare before turning her attention away, she pulled out of the parking lot not looking back to me. Juugo finally made it out of the club and came running over to me. His eyes glanced to the car, before turning towards me.
"Sasuke what happened?"
"Karin...she kissed me and Sakura, she..." I trailed off.
"She saw it!" He finished for me as his eyes widened.
"I didn't kiss her Juugo she just suddenly did it when I was trying to go back into the club." I glanced down to the ground, I suddenly felt cold and hollow and I think Juugo may have noticed since he was looking at me with concern.
My chest clenched at the thought of losing Sakura, my heart was racing at this point. It hurts. I never thought I would experience this pain again, but I am now and I don't want to feel this way. Juugo set his hand on my shoulder and led me down the sidewalk, I felt lost, like nothing made sense anymore. I stopped as Juugo looked to me, I was facing the ground with my hair covering my eyes.
"Juugo what am I going to do?" I whispered.
He was at loss for words, he sighed and pushed me to keep walking. He was silent for a few moments before he decided to speak.
"Go back to her home once she's had a chance to cool down, then try to explain to her what happened."
"What if she won't listen?" I questioned quietly.
"There's only one way to find out."
I sat on the park bench alone, with my head in my hands, I told Juugo I needed some time to think so he went ahead and decided to go get some coffee. It was nearing nine o'clock and I still haven't gone to see Sakura, Juugo told me to wait a few hours before going over to her home, but how long should I wait? It's already been two hours since the incident, should I head over there now?
Growling to myself, I stared at the ground. How could I have let that kiss happen? I should have known by now the kind of stunts Karin would pull off to try and get what she wants. She has always been that way. How could I have thought this would work out the way I wanted it to? Nothing goes the way they are supposed to in my life.
Giving a deep sigh I leaned back on the bench and stared at the sky, glancing over the stars and then to the moon, before turning my attention to the empty park before me. So dark and desolate, like my heart, I smiled bitterly at that, was there nothing about pain and dark emptiness that didn't relate to me?
There wasn't anyone here at this time of night, not that it really surprised me, no one wants to come here in the dark. But I didn't mind it, the dark was actually more comforting to me rather than daylight. A lot of people would ask why? But honestly I don't know why, I just like the dark for some reason.
Maybe it's because I'm such a dark person, or at least I am most of the time. When I was around Sakura, I wasn't as dark and hollow as I thought I was. Now that would change because of that stupid move Karin made. I don't want Sakura and I to be over, I...love her. More than I loved Karin, more than I love my photography and music.
She is the one I want to be with. Why wouldn't she just listen to me? Then things could go back to the way they were when we started dating. I wouldn't mind if things went back to the way they were before I kissed her that first time. At least then, she didn't hate me like she does now. I don't know what the hell I have to do to be happy in my life, it's always the same and it never seems to change. Things are good one minute, then they drastically change for the worse.
I stood as I took a deep breath and clenched my fists tightly, I had to talk to Sakura, and try and resolve this issue, I won't let it end this way. I can't let it end this way. But what do I do if I can't convince her that it was a mistake?
That hit me hard....What will happen to us?
Fuck I guess I never really thought that through.
I walked up to the front door of Sakura's home a few hours later, I still had the spare key that she gave me, but I chose to knock on the door instead. I would feel like I'm intruding if I just unlocked the door and walked inside at his point. My phone buzzed in my pocket as I waited for her to answer. Great. Another text message from Sakura's friends, they have been doing nothing but sending me rude and hurtful texts after the incident with Karin.
I chose to ignore it as Sakura opened the door roughly and glanced to me, she left it open as I stepped inside and saw her putting all of my belongings into boxes. My turned my gaze to her with questioning eyes which she must have understood.
"Take your things and get out." She didn't look at me as she dropped another box by the door, and rather recklessly I might add.
"Sakura, will you just listen to me." I tried to talk to her but she refused to hear me out and just dropped another box by the doorway.
"If you think I'm going to talk to you after what happened at the club then you really are messed up in the head." She stated through gritted teeth.
"Sakura please..." I don't know if she did it reflexively or purposely, but she slapped me across the face leaving a red mark on my cheek. She really does hate me doesn't she?
I stared wide eyed at her not bothering to touch the new mark that she left. She didn't seem to regret what she did, and at this point the real first fight between her and I started. A fight that I never thought would happen.
"YOU'RE AN ASSHOLE! YOU SAID YOU AND HER WERE OVER!" She yelled at me and took a step back to get as far away from me as possible. But her yelling caused me to shout back.
"HER AND I ARE OVER! I DON'T LOVE HER! I DON'T WANT TO BE WITH HER!"
I noticed briefly that Raven and Fang were hiding under a table whining at us. Our yelling was scaring them, but it just kept going.
"YOU'RE LYING!"
'NO I'M NOT! SAKURA DON'T DO THIS! I'M TELLING YOU THE TRUTH!"
She suddenly turned quiet.
"I don't know if I should believe you." She looked away from me, her eyes showing the distress she was feeling. "You kissed her...You kissed her and you expect me to believe you don't love her anymore. You are a liar Sasuke and don't even try and deny it."
"Sakura she kissed me. I didn't kiss her. I tried to go back into the club and she followed me." My eyes pleaded for her to believe me.
"How do I know that's not a lie? How do I know that you're not just saying that to make me trust you?" She cried out with tears stinging her eyes.
"If that were the case, why would I spend my time with you? Why would I have saved you all of those times if I didn't want you to be safe so we could be together? Why did I share my secrets with you? Secrets that only Juugo knew. Why would I place my trust in you? Why would I be standing here if I loved her?
"I don't know." She stated.
"What is it you want from me?" I said, my voice a little shaky. "What is it that you want Sakura?"
My voice turned soft when she didn't respond as I looked at her and shook my head. "I don't know what you want in this life Sakura. But apparently its not me. You've turned everyone against me. All of the people who I thought were my friends and you. You're the worst out of all of them...You're no better than she is."
"Well you're no better than the other guys I've dated," She countered back to me.
"Oh yeah because I'm the one that beat you and tried to rape you, I am way different than those bastards that you call 'guys you've date'. I paused before continuing. "You don't know the good things that you have until they are gone."
"Yes I do, and your not part of those good things that are in my life, not after what you did."
"I TOLD YOU I DIDN'T KISS HER! WHY WON'T YOU FUCKING LISTEN TO ME?!" I shouted to her as she glared at me with hatred in her eyes.
"BECAUSE I SAW YOU, YOU AND HER WERE LIP LOCKED!" Her tears fell down her face as she turned away from me.
She whispered. "Just get out Sasuke. Get out and don't you ever come back, I never want to see you again, just get out of my life."
"Fine." I stated. I wasn't going to take this anymore, there was no way she was going to listen to me. Juugo was wrong, she didn't calm down, she was just getting angrier by hour when she left the club. I can't believe this is really happening to me.
I turned and left her standing alone in her home. I didn't see her face, because I didn't want to but I'd imagined she was crying even more, but at that moment I just didn't care. I got into my car and started the engine, I sat there for a few moments, contemplating what had just happened. Several questions ran through my head, and I couldn't answer any of them.
Why do all the relationships I have go to hell? Why do I deserve this? Am I being punished for something? If so, what is God making me pay for? Was I not meant to be loved? Was I always meant to be alone?
Shifting into drive I let those questions drift away as I gripped the steering wheel and pulled out of Sakura's driveway and drove down the road, the music was playing and it was a song I didn't want to hear right now, Would It Matter By Skillet.
if I wasn't here tomorrow would anybody care
if my time was up I'd wanna know
You were happy I was there
if I wasn't here tomorrow would anyone lose sleep
if I wasn't hard and hollow
Then maybe you would miss me
I stopped at a red light and just sat there waiting and listening to that song before I shut it off. Damn fucking music, why did that song have to play? It was a good song when I wasn't feeling the way I was right now. What does anything matter anymore? What would anyone do if I died tonight? They probably wouldn't care, so why should I?
It seemed like forever before the light decided to switch to green. When it did I stepped on the gas, I wanted to get as far away as possible and try to put this behind me, but no matter how hard I tried, the pain growing in my heart would never go away. It would fester and build until the day I died, I don't think I'll be able to recover from this.
I drove towards the intersection, thinking I'd go through it without a problem. Immediately upon crossing I saw a bright light to my left out of the window, that's when those thoughts of not caring if I died came back. I didn't think it would actually try and occur, but I guess that's the way of life right? It just came so fast, but everything seemed to go in slow motion.
The last thing I saw were the bright headlights of a semi truck, then everything just went black.
My ears picked up on the sound of people screaming and yelling at each other. I tried to figure out how long it had been, and where I was, but what really got me was the unbearable pain I felt in my left side, and throughout my body. I could barely breath, something is crushing me. What happened? Where am I? I feel like I'm slipping away, slipping into a very dark corner of my mind.
Through shear force of my will power, I cracked my eyes open. My left arm was trapped underneath something, so I opted to lift whatever it is with my right, but that was no use. I had no strength. I felt my right side burning as badly as my left. When I reached to touch it I flinched from the sudden pain I felt, but I also felt something wet. I pulled my hand back and from the moonlight outside I saw red liquid. Blood. I was bleeding, and from the looks of it, it was pretty bad. The same liquid ran down my face, my head was bleeding too? Shit.
"SASUKE!" I heard my name be called.
What's going on? I saw, what appeared to be flashlights, shine in through the back window as I tried to remember what happened but I came up with nothing. My eyes shifted back and forth, and found that my car was trapped between a building and a large truck? Was there an accident? Did I get caught in it? Was I....My thoughts trailed off when a wave of dizziness overcame me as I shut my eyes and reopened them. The truck was moving, I'm guessing they were getting it out of the way.
The pain was growing worse, it just kept burning, and wasn't going to let up. I think something may have pierced my side, or both of my sides, I don't know. The pain was so intense I couldn't focus. I could have sworn I heard my name being called again but everything suddenly became quiet to me. My eyes drifted shut as the sounds returned and the sound of metal being pulled apart reached my ears.
I felt my arm being freed from whatever had it pinned down and I felt someone touch my neck. "He's alive." I wanted to open my eyes to see who it was but they were just too heavy. I didn't have any strength to do anything or even give out a groan to prove to myself I wasn't dead. But I knew I wasn't the pain gave me enough proof for that.
But when whatever had pierced my side was moved I let out a moan that said I was in pain. It burns, I wish I could speak and tell them to stop but no words would come from my lips.
"Be careful, one wrong move could kill him." I heard someone say.
"I know, but if we don't get him out soon, he'll die of blood loss." Another man said.
"Get the door off, we can pull him out and get him into the ambulance."
I heard more metal being pulled and I felt someone grab my arm while someone else grabbed a hold of my waist and pulled me. My feet touched solid ground as I heard them shout again.
"We need that stretcher over here!"
I felt something soft press against my back as something was placed over my face, my chest suddenly became cold as I felt pressure be put on my sides. To stop the bleeding maybe?. I cracked my eyes open so they were half lidded, there were several people hovering above me shining lights into my eyes and attaching IVs to my arm.
"SASUKE!" There was that call again. Who is it?
The person called me again and came to stand above me as I felt myself moving. There was something pink and orange but my head was becoming fuzzy, my eyes wouldn't stay open much longer. Someone or something touched my hand, it was a warm touch, but it soon vanished.
I finally passed out from the pain, what happened to me?
What's going on? I feel...pain, pain I wish would go away. This hurts worse than anything I've ever felt before. My body won't move, why do I feel so cold? What's that sound? Talking? Crying? Are there people here? Where am I? I furrowed my eyebrows before I forced my eyes to open, before I shut them quickly and reopened them.
It was too bright, the room was so white. I saw my parents standing a little ways away, my mom being held in the arms of my dad. She's crying. My eyes shifted around and I spotted my brother sitting on a chair with his head in his hands, Koji sat next to him with a sad look on his face. Looking around the room, I saw Juugo, then Naruto and Hinata, the shy girl was talking to him, as if comforting him.
Ino and Sai stood against the wall with Neji and Tenten, they were talking about something, but I didn't make it a goal to find out. Temari, Shikamaru and Lee were standing in the corner looking to the floor, but why? Why are they all here?
I felt my hand being held by someone so I looked down and spotted something pink.
Sakura?
I took notice that there was an oxygen mask covering my nose and mouth. Suddenly remembering what happened with her, I pulled my hand away from hers with any strength I may have had. She flinched, from shock maybe? And her head shot up from its resting position in her arms. Her emerald eyes were filled with tears as they widened.
"Sasuke!" She practically shouted which grabbed the others attention.
She hugged me in a tight grip, but not too tight where it would hurt me even if I still felt a stinging feeling on my sides. I didn't return it, nor did I say anything. She let me go when she realized this as a doctor came into the room and walked over then peered over me.
"Get them out," I stated weakly.
"Excuse me?"
"I want them all to leave."
The doctor looked to the occupants in the room and silently told them to leave. Sakura was shocked by this, why? I don't know and I don't care. She should have been expecting it from me after what happened. It didn't make any sense, one moment she's yelling at me, and now she's crying over me because I'm in a hospital.
As soon as they were gone I lifted my hands up and placed them against my face. There was a cast like bandage on my left, most likely a sprain, it didn't feel broken. I also felt a bandage on my face and around my head. I noticed the doctor had stayed behind and I stared at her. She gave a sigh before she decided she would speak.
"You gave your family and friends quite a scare."
"Hn, what friends? Most of those people are a bunch of two-faced rats." I glanced away from her and stared at the wall before turning my gaze to the ceiling.
"Look, you almost died, and you're still not completely healed. Give them a break." She was scolding me, like I give a shit about what she says.
"How long have I been out?" I asked ignoring what she said about giving them a break.
"Two weeks." She told me.
"What?!" I turned to look at her.
"The accident you were in, injured you severely. You're lucky to be alive."
"What happened?" I asked, I truly didn't know.
"There was a drunk man operating a semi, you know the big diesel trucks that transport things." She was ranting now.
"Yeah I get, just get on with it." I said and wiped my eye, as she muttered 'fine' to herself but I still heard it.
"He ran a red light when you crossed while yours was green. He rammed into you at a high speed and pushed your car into a building." She glanced over a clipboard. "From what I was told, it took them almost an hour to pull you from the wreckage."
"When can I leave?" I mumbled as my side burned from the wound.
"In about two days." She said and headed towards the door. "Call the nurse if you need anything."
She left without another word, as I thought about the information I was given. I almost died? That was a lot to take in, but I realized something, I didn't care. If I wasn't here anymore, I would surely be happy. I wouldn't have to deal with all of this pain and take the verbal abuse and emotional abuse from these people I met in this hell I know as life.
Maybe they should have just let me die instead
I heard a knock on the door before it opened to reveal my parents, I really didn't want to tell them to get out so I just let them enter, I sighed, here we go, mom is going to start the waterworks. She walked over to my side with tears in her eyes, she grabbed my hand as the tears slid down her cheeks.
"Mom," I said with ache in my voice, "Don't cry."
"It's kind of hard not to. Your father and I didn't know if you were going to make it, there were a few times when your heart stopped and we thought we had lost you." She told me. "We thought you were gone and we couldn't bring you back."
"I know, I never thought this would happen to me," I mumbled, "I guess life really is full of surprises, you never know what will happen."
"Sasuke, you should get some rest," My dad said as he placed a hand on my shoulder, "The doctor said you'll need all the rest you can get."
"Yeah I know...wait, who's been taking care of Fang?" I asked worriedly and tried to sit up, if I've been unconscious for two weeks who's been feeding him.
"Relax, he's at Sakura's place, he's been under her care since the accident." My father explained to me before he pushed me down to prevent me from sitting up.
"She wants to talk to you." I knew my mom was referring to Sakura.
I glanced to my mom as she said this. That cold feeling suddenly washed through me, I didn't embrace it, but I didn't reject it either, there was somethings I just let occur without really doing anything to acknowledge it.
"I don't want to talk to her." I turned my gaze away from my parents.
"Why not?"
"Ask Juugo, I really don't want to talk about it."
"Get some sleep Sasuke." My dad said as him and my mom left the room.
I didn't realize how tired I was until I shut my eyes, not to mention the headache I have throbbing in my temple. Maybe some sleep is what I need, I began to fall asleep, but not before hearing the door to my room open, I don't know who it was, and right now, I don't think I want to know, I just wanted some sleep and hopefully put this nightmare behind me.
A/N Here it is another chapter of Ignored Love. I wanted to quit writing this chapter since my finger is sore, my friend TJ smashed my finger in a door, ah but I can't help but not be mad at him. Crazy kid is going to drive me nuts XD. But I managed to finish this, I have to say things are likely to change drastically. Bet you can't guess what will happen. :P
I'll try to update One Night in the next few days....And well I guess that's all I have to say. :)
