A/N: I apologize for my long absence, I was suffering from writers block and an overly busy schedule. I'm working on setting aside more time in the future to write so that I can post more often. I thank my readers who have remain loyal while I have been AWOL and will be trying my best to get more chapters posted soon though I'm not making any deadlines or promises just to be safe. Without further ado I give you what you have so patiently waited for, the next chapter! Enjoy!
Edward woke to the sound of rain hitting the roof of the tent and darkness pressing in around him. Faintly, under the noise of the rain, Ed could hear the deep even breathing of Riza sleeping. He turned over then adjusted his bunched up shirt to once again rest his head on. Through the dimness he could barely make out her form laying on the blanket next to him, less than an arm's length away. He closed his eyes and slowly began to rub his shoulder port trying to relieve himself of the deep ache, hoping to drift off to sleep. After what felt like an eternity Edward gave up the hopeless endeavor and opened his eyes to look at Riza again. He could just make out her form laying on her side facing towards the wall of the tent and Ed could see her golden blonde hair sprawled out between the two of them. He saw her shift slightly and heard her breathing change, she was stirring or falling into a dream, Edward wasn't sure which.
"You could stop staring any time now." Riza said softly as she rolled over to face Edward.
"Shouldn't you be sleeping?" Ed asked raising an eyebrow.
"It's hard to sleep with someone staring at you." Riza said with a smirk.
"There's nothing else to look at." Edward said with a frown as he unconsciously rubbed his shoulder port.
"You could spend your time staring at the tent like I was for the last couple hours." Riza said as she pulled her long hair from underneath her.
"I'm pretty sure you were sleeping the last couple hours."
Riza sighed and turned over on her back to stare at the top of the tent. "I can't sleep."
"Afraid you're going to have nightmares?" Edward asked softly.
Riza could only nod.
"Do you want to talk about?"
Riza shook her head and remained silent for a long time. "What time do you think it is?" Riza asked finally breaking the silence.
"It's probably close to 3:30 am." Edward yawned as he dug in his pocket. He pulled out his state alchemist watch and opened it. "8:33."
"In the morning?" Riza asked sitting up.
"Apparently." Edward said as he watched Riza's hair fall gracefully around her shoulders.
"Why is it still so dark if it's morning?"
"It's called a storm."
Riza sighed. "So much for the rain letting up by morning. What are we going to do now?" She asked as she readjusted herself to face Ed and pulled her knees to her chest.
"Wait out the storm." Edward said as he scratched his bare chest.
"How long before it passes?"
"Well…." Edward paused and rubbed his shoulder port again. "If the overwhelming nausea and horrible aching in my ports is any indication, it's going to be a while."
Riza rubbed her temples and closed her eyes. "We can't be stuck in this little tent for more than another night."
Edward watched Riza through the dark and swore he could see a look of worry on her face when she opened her eyes. "We don't have a choice."
"Most of our rations have to be cooked over a fire, what are we going to eat?" Riza asked frowning.
"You can eat the few rations that don't need to be cooked and I'm going to pass on all of that so called food, I won't keep it down anyway." Edward said with a sigh. "I wish we weren't here, I want to be somewhere with a comfortable bed."
"When we get back you can have the bed, I'd take the couch over sleeping on the ground. I did more than enough of this already in my life." Riza said she rubbed her lower back.
Edward laughed to himself. "Alphonse and I spent numerous nights sleeping on the floor as kids, we preferred it."
Riza shook her head. "I never slept on the floor as a kid, I thought it was horrible to have to sleep on the hard ground. The first time I slept on the ground was in Ishval."
"Is that why you have nightmares?" Edward asked with a smirk. "Fear of sleeping on the ground?" He laughed at the look of annoyance on Riza's face.
"No." Riza said forcefully.
The two lapsed back into silence, Edward turned over to look at the roof of the tent. The silence lingered between the two for what seemed like an eternity. Finally, Riza lay back on the ground to face the ceiling.
"This is weird." Edward muttered breaking the silence.
Riza turned her head to stare at Ed, looking at him as if he had sprouted another head.
He laughed. "I mean General Grumman sending us out here to the middle of no where for some kind of training mission or boarder control or whatever this is."
Riza nodded. "I've been thinking the same thing."
"Is the purpose to do something here or be absent from Central."
"I didn't think of it that way." Riza said looking back up at the roof.
"What's really weird is that we're practically paired off." Edward said as he reached down to rub his leg port.
Before Riza could reply a crack of lightning lit the sky and tent followed by the deafening boom of thunder. The darkness swallowed the light and then the noise.
Edward glanced over at Riza to see her sitting up rigidly. "You okay?" Ed whispered.
She didn't move or speak a word.
"Riza?" Edward asked sitting up and reached out a hand to her. He gently grasped Riza's shoulder to find that she was trembling. "Riza?"
Riza took in a shaky breath then spoke in a small uneven voice. "Fine."
"You are not." Edward said as he scooted closer to her. "Are you frightened of the lightning?"
Riza shook her head, her gaze fixed over Ed's shoulder.
"It's the thunder." Edward said forcing Riza to look at him.
Once again lightning flashed across the sky followed by another ear-splitting rumble of thunder.
Riza jumped forward in Ed's arms, shaking uncontrollably, burying her face into his bare chest. Taken aback, Ed sat still his flesh arm still reaching out in front of him and his metal at his side. There was a long awkward moment before Edward wrapped his arms protectively around Riza.
"It's okay." He whispered as he gently stroked her back. Riza shook her head and Ed could feel a dampness on his skin, she was crying. "It's just a noise, it can't hurt you."
Another flash of lighting, followed by the thunder, interrupted Ed. Riza sobbed and pushed herself farther into Edward's arms. Her legs were folded in his lap, her head in his chest, and her arms were wrapped around his middle in a death grip.
"It's okay, it's okay." Ed said as he rubbed her back soothingly. "You're safe."
"No, no, …coming….no….coming." Riza gasped out in between cries.
"It's just thunder." Edward said looking down at Riza. "You're safe, thunder can't hurt you."
"No, he will hurt me, he will." Riza said before another sob escaped.
Edward opened his mouth to speak but the lightning flashed across the sky and he pulled Riza closer just as the thunder sounded.
Riza cried harder in Ed's arms. "It's him, he's coming."
"Calm down, it's just thunder." Edward said with a shiver from the dampness on his chest. "There's no one coming."
"He's coming, he's coming, please don't let him take me, please!" Riza cried hysterically into Ed's chest.
Another boom of thunder, making Edward feel helpless. He didn't know what was going on with her or who she was talking about. He sighed and stroked her back remaining silent. Ed desperately wanted to settle her but none of his racing thoughts helped. "Please, calm down, Riza." Edward whispered into her ear as he hugged her close. "You're safe, I'll protect you."
"You can't…you can't…he's coming….he'll just kill you….he'll laugh as he does it…I'll have to watch." Edward could barely make out the words muffled by his chest and her cries.
"I'll protect you, you're safe." Edward said forcefully as he gripped Riza, pulling her closer. "I won't let anyone hurt you and they can't hurt me." Another flash of lightning barely lit the tent, it was some distance away now, and the thunder was a soft rumble in the distance. "See, it's getting farther away not closer, you're safe."
Riza slowly stopped shaking but remained in Edward's arms. She didn't speak anymore and the sobs became silent. Ed could still feel the tears landing on his chest but he said nothing as he rubbed her back. They stayed this way until the tears had ceased, then Edward spoke. "It's okay."
Riza shook her head. "I'm sorry." She whispered in a shaky voice. "I'm sorry." Slowly she pulled herself away from Ed, her face was tear soaked and her eyes were bloodshot. "I'm so sorry." Riza mumbled as she scooted away from Edward, looking down to hide her face, shamefully.
"It's okay-"
"No, it's not," Riza said as she pulled her knees to her chest and buried her face.
"Okay." Edward said with a sigh as he looked at her.
An awkward silence settled between the two and only the sound of the rain on the tent and the fierce wind in the trees was heard. Edward gazed at Riza for a while then shrugged and laid back on the ground. He yawned loudly as he rubbed his ports.
"I have nightmares of Ishval." Riza mumbled softly without lifting her head.
"Everyone who was in Ishval does." Edward said with a shrug, lacking more comforting words.
"So many horrible memories haunt me from that time."
"It was a horrible war."
"I relive some of the worst moments every night."
Edward nodded unsure what to say.
"The sound of the thunder reminds me of the buildings exploding." Riza looked up at Edward, her eyes seemed haunted and almost soulless. "I hate when the explosions sounded, it always meant he wasn't far behind." Riza spoke in a whisper that Edward could barely hear over the rain.
"He who?" Edward asked sitting up.
Riza took a shuddering breath, "Kimblee."
Edward cocked his head to one side in confusion. "What did Kimblee do?"
"He took great pleasure in testing my will and strength plus he made it his personal mission to torment me ever moment possible. In fact, he had himself transferred into my unit just to continue brutalizing me further. He shattered my defenses and I broke. All of those horrible moments still haunt me, I relive them every night and ever quiet minute in the day." Riza mumbled more to herself than Ed.
"You're not broken." Edward said as he scooted closer to Riza.
Riza laughed, though no amusement carried with the sound. "Nightmares every night, thoughts haunted, and not even able to hear thunder without having a break down. And I know without a doubt I could never face him again. I'm pretty sure that means he broke me."
"But despite the nightmares, you get up every morning and do what needs to be done, you stand on your own two feet, that doesn't sound broken to me." Edward said as he wrapped his steel arm around her shoulders, trying to give her some comfort.
"I feel broken." Riza sighed as she put her face back in her knees.
Edward reached forward with his flesh arm and gently grasped her chin, lifting her face. Without thinking he leaned forward and captured her lips with his own, giving her a tender and delicate kiss. He let his lips linger on hers for a moment before pulling away. "I think you're an incredible woman who stands proudly on her own two feet. Who is capable and skilled in her own rights. That knows just how to handle people and every situation with a cool, level head. Does that sound like a broken women to you?"
Riza laughed softly against his lips as tears rolled down her cheeks. "I don't think anyone has ever described me that way before."
"That only half describes you." Edward said as he gently stroked her cheek with his thumb, whipping the stray tears.
Riza lifted an eyebrow in question over his statement. "What else would you say to accurately portray me?"
"That you are a sensual and beautiful woman, that carries herself with humble confidence. You wear a stern face when the occasion calls for it but you have a stunning smile that lights up the room when you laugh or enjoy yourself. You have the most remarkable eyes that show the depths of your soul and emotions. And you have hands gentle enough to care for a lost puppy but strong enough to hold a weapon to protect the ones that matter most to you."
Riza opened her mouth to speak but once again Edward seized her lips in a warm kiss as he moved closer to her, wrapping both arms around her. After a tense moment, Riza moved her arms to return the embrace but gradually pulled her lips away. "How is it you can discern all that about me."
Edward smirked. "I'm an alchemist, I have to know the composition of everything before it can be reconstructed, only in your case I don't think you should change."
Riza nodded quietly. "That's all very sweet."
"I'm not trying to be sweet, I'm trying to be honest." Edward whispered. "In fact, I think I'm falling for you."
Riza made a soft sound of surprise and completely detangled herself from the alchemist, moving away. "You can't!"
"And why can't I?" Edward asked taken aback as he let his empty arms fall to his side.
"We're both Military officers, it's forbidden." Riza scolded Edward in her Lieutenant tone.
"You know it's none of the Military's business who you chose to love." Edward said shaking his head.
"While that's true, it would be a court-martial if this ever got out." Riza said as shook her head, a frown slowly taking her smile away.
Edward sighed, knowing he was facing a losing battle. "You're right, let's just drop the whole thing." He shifted himself to face away from Riza. "I won't say anything else about it. It's up to you if we ever have this conversation again."
Riza nodded softly then stood. "I know it's raining but I need to stretch my legs." She moved to the tent door.
"Put some shoes on first." Edward said as he moved back onto his blanket. "I'm going to take a nap." He laid down and adjusted his bunched up shirt to serve as a better pillow.
"Right." Riza mumbled and quickly pulled on her shoes with difficultly while standing. Once her boots were laced she opened the tent and moved as swiftly as possible into the rain before closing the door, leaving Edward alone in the tent with his thoughts.
