An Ounce of Restraint

by: karacullen23

Rated: NC-17

WARNING: Slash, as in two men having sexual relations. If this isn't your cuppa' tea, don't read.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters, nor do I get paid for the crap that I write.

Chapter Eight

(Lex's POV)

"You must stop him."

I spin around behind me, but no one's there. Toby left almost twenty minutes ago, and I don't know where Clark is.

"You must stop him Alexander."

"Who's there?" I whisper into the empty hallway, my entire body trembling. You're cracking up, Lex, it's finally happened, you've gone total bat shit crazy!

"I am Jor-El, birth father to Kal-El, the man you know as Clark Kent."

"I don't understand?"

"All you must understand for now Alexander is that you must stop him before it's too late and his destiny is changed forever. The entire fate earth's future is at stake. You must go, now."

Bright light erupts from above and closes in on me. The light is hot and my entire body feels like it's going to burn and blister. Then as suddenly as the light appeared, it's gone. I take a moment to catch my breath and look down at my trembling hands, expecting to see oozing, red blisters, but my hands are fine. I let out a shaky breath only to have it knocked out of me again. I don't know how the hell It happened, but I'm standing at the entrance to LuthorCorp, in Metropolis.

(Clark's POV)

With tears streaming down my face I bust into his office. He's sitting at his glass top desk and looks up at me, surprise written all over his face.

"Clark?"

I rush at him not caring that I'm giving myself away. I tear through the desk to get at him, wood and glass and debris flying in all directions. All I care about is getting my hands on him. His eyes widen in a moment of horror as I grab for his throat. My entire body feels hot and electrified as I throw him like a rag doll into the far wall. "You sick bastard! You sorry son of a bitch!" I scream at him.

He's slumped in a heap on the floor, his hand rubbing at his sore throat. Blood trickles out of his nose and the sight of it sends shivers of satisfaction through me and urges me on. I stomp over and loom above him. I glare down at him, the heat building behind my eyes and I let it burn. "How could you?" I spit out as the wall beside him starts to smoke and then suddenly burst into flames.

He tries to get to his feet but I'm there, and before I realize I'm doing it, I have a fistful of his hair and I'm bashing his face into the floor, and he's screaming. I've never heard Lionel Luthor scream before, I like it...very much. "How could you do that to Lex? He's your son? Your son!"

His arms flail uselessly about trying to get hold of me to stop me. It's pointless, no one can save him now. He goes limp and I let him drop to the floor. He moans and rolls over to look up at me. His face is covered in blood, he coughs and gags and spits out a mouthful of slobbery bright red blood. His nose is twisted grotesqly to one side. I reach down to grab him but he puts his arm up to shield me. "Clark...Clark please..."

I stop and tilt my head to one side and look him in the eyes. "Did Lex plead with you? Did you show him mercy?"

His broken face pales as realization comes to him. "Clark, I would never hurt my son. I don't know what you think I did, but I assure you, it's not true. Lex is...Lex is, well, he's not well Clark. He's delusional, out of touch with reality right now. Clark, I found him like that in Metropolis."

The longer he goes on, the angrier I get. "Enough!" I shout at him. I pick him up by his blood sticky throat and slam him up against the wall, his feet dangle off the floor as I hold him there. I snarl up at him, "You're a monster. You make me sick and you don't deserve to live." I start to squeeze, choking him. His eyes bulge and his hands claw at me for relief, but I just hold him tighter. I could crush his windpipe or snap his neck no problem at all. But I'd rather watch him die slowly. It takes all of my self-control not to simply snap his neck in an instant. I exhort just enough pressure to keep the air from entering his lungs. His mouth opens and closes trying to suck in air that won't come. He looks like a fish out of water. His face is bright red and his struggling starts to lose its oomph. Just as his eyes roll into the back of his head and he loses consciousness I feel a light touch on my shoulder.

I whip my head around. "Lex?"

"Clark, don't" His voice is quiet, almost a whisper.

"Why shouldn't I? He hurt you. Lex I know what he did to you? He's a monster!" I slam Lionel's limp body into the wall for emphasis.

Lex places a trembling hand on mine that has his father by the throat. His stormy eyes plead with me. "Clark, I can't let you do this."

"I want to kill him for what he did to you. I won't let him hurt you ever again." I snarl into Lionel's unconscious and broken face.

"You're not a killer Clark. I can't let you become one because of me." He grips me by the wrist and squeezes. "Let go, Clark. Please. This isn't who you are. This isn't who I want you to be...ever."

The anger drains from me and it's replaced with a numb sort of cold feeling. I loose my grip on Lionel and he crashes to the floor at my feet.

I stand, stunned and unable to so much as twitch a muscle. Terrified of myself, my actions.

"He's still breathing, but his pulse is pretty weak. We should probably call a doctor."

I hadn't noticed before, but I notice now. Lex is on his knees, leaning over his father, his delicate fingers feeling the pulse at Lionel's bloody throat. The sight of Lex like that, on his knees at his father's side looking very obviously worried confuses me and brings some of the anger back.

"Did he call a doctor for you Lex?" I spit out.

He blanches and swallows hard.

"Why should you care after what he did to you? Let him lay there and choke on his own blood and die for all I fucking care!"

He gapes up at me in astonishment. "He's still my father, Clark."

It's my turn to gape. "Don't tell me you give a shit whether he lives or dies, Lex. Don't tell me give a shit about this sick, pathetic excuse for a human being!"

He lets go of his fathers arm and stands up to face me. He places both of his hands on either side of my face and his desperate eyes bore into me as though he's trying to speak directly into my soul. "Clark, I can't lie to you. I don't know why, after everything he's done, I still don't want to see him killed. I can't explain it, and I hate it that I feel this way. But that's not what this is about. This is about you, Clark."

"I don't understand, Lex."

"I'd rather die myself then see you become a murderer Clark. If you were to cross that line, you'd never be able to completely come back from that. It would change you, forever. Change you into someone other than the man I fell in love with."

I don't know how to respond to him. I feel ashamed and confused. I feel the ghost of potential loss whisper in my ear. He's right. No man could ever be the same after having taken a life. How can either of us be so sure that Lex could still love me after something like that? If I were to become a killer, especially if I were the one to kill his father. Could we survive something like that? Probably not. And then it hits me, "Oh God, I almost killed him! I almost killed him Lex!" I feel suddenly very cold and I tremble.

Lex pulls me into his arms and his soft lips brush sweetly against my neck. "It's alright Clark, It's ok. He's not dead." He steps away towards the far wall, which is still in flames. "But we should probably call the fire department"

"Oh, shit!" I tear my shirt off up over my head and rush over and start batting at the flames licking up the wall.

"Clark! You'll burn yourself!" His voice is full of anxiety.

"It's ok, it can't hurt me." I call out over my shoulder. I continue beating at the flames, secretly wishing I could just let it burn. Let the fire burn big and hot and eat Lionel.

"Clark!"

The last bit of flame dies out and I wipe the sweat from my forehead with my scorched shirt. Lex rushes over to me and grabs my arms to inspect the damage that he's sure must be there, even though there isn't any. I hold my soot covered hands palm up and open them to show Lex. "See, I'm fine."

His finger touches my outstretched palm gently to be sure. Once convinced that no damage was done he shakes his head incredulously and lets out a deep and shaky breath. "Christ."

"I'm sorry, Lex."

He drops my hands and runs a trembling hand over his skull. I usually enjoy watching this particular unconscious nervous gesture of his, but not now. Not when I'm the cause of his distress.

"Let's just go home, okay?" His voice sounds far away from me, and I realize he's put his guard up. He turns on his heels and marches towards the door not bothering to see if I'm following. I think he's mad, or worse, afraid of me. Afraid of the freak alien who nearly killed his father, set the place on fire and then battled the flames out using nothing but a t-shirt and my bare hands.

He calls over his shoulder from the doorway to ask if I'm coming. I start to put my shirt back on, but realize it's no use, it's completely destroyed. I bunch it up into my hand and follow Lex out the door.