Author's Notes: So, another update just days later, but I'll let you all in on a little secret. This story passed 100K this weekend and I'm going to try to make a little time every day to edit each chapter as best as I can (even then I miss typos, so forgive me! Personally I'd rather spend my free time writing more more more, but you know...) We're getting closer to the parts I know everyone is waiting for, and trust me when I tell you that it's worth the wait! Please remember to leave a review as they're always much appreciated and make my day so much better (though I doubt anything can top the Morrilla pics from the s4 premiere last night right now lol)


Emma smiled as she sat on the front steps of the cottage's porch and watched as Henry went running towards Ruby, practically tackling her before she could get out of her car. Ruby's laughter along with Henry's filled her ears and she couldn't help but smile at the feeling it brought on.

She and Henry had spent most of the day out in the woods exploring and after getting lost for an hour, they finally found their way back to the cottage, both a little worse for the wear after Emma slipped and fell down into a shallow ravine. That had been the end to their exploring for the day and she promised Henry they would try again another day.

"Ruby!" Henry exclaimed as she picked him up and twirled around with him, peppering his face with kisses, her red lipstick leaving marks all over his face. "You're really here!"

"I really am!" She laughed and she put him back down on his feet. "I missed you, kid."

"It's only been four days since we left."

"Four days too many if you ask me."

"Did Mom know you were coming?"

"I asked her to keep it a surprise," Ruby said, looking over at Emma and winking before she popped the trunk of her red sports car. "Do you want to help me bring in my stuff?"

Henry nodded, grabbing the bag he could carry easily and rushed towards the front steps. "Mom, there's only two bedrooms. Where is Ruby sleeping?"

"She can have the other bedroom."

"Are you sure?" Ruby asked as she approached them. "I can stay on the couch, Em. It's not a big deal."

"Take her stuff upstairs, Henry."

"Okay, Mom."

Emma sighed as she took a sip of her beer and looked up at Ruby. "It's not a big deal. It's not like I've been sleeping much since we got here. If it makes you feel any better, we can switch up every couple of days?"

"That makes me feel a little better. Not so much about the whole you not sleeping thing, though and you know we're going to have a little talk about that, right?"

"Did you bring it?"

Ruby nodded as she hooked a thumb over her shoulder at the car. "Safely tucked under the backseat. Do you want me to—"

"Not until later. And we'll talk, later. Not with Henry around."

"What did you tell him about her?"

"Just what he needed to know."

Ruby nodded in understanding before walking back to her car to carry a much heavier bag inside. Emma sighed and took another long sip of her beer and leaned against the post, watching the few fluffy white clouds skip across the sky as they caught the colour of the brilliant sunset that had just begun. The corners of her mouth lifted as she heard the laughter coming from inside. She closed her eyes and willed herself not to think of any more memories—good or bad—when it came to Regina and instead tried to stay in the moment and relish in the relieved feeling that had settled inside of her the moment she saw the fancy red sports car come to a stop behind her Bug.

Emma stayed out on the porch, listening to Ruby and Henry inside, Ruby's laughter as Henry described their road trip to Storybrooke in excruciating detail, to the first night they spent in Storybrooke in the yellow Bug, to the storm that came around and nearly flooded the bedroom that Emma had relinquished to Ruby without a second though, right down to the way Regina had been staring at them, more specifically him, in the diner the day before. He didn't fail to mention the food wasn't nearly as good as Granny's and that it shouldn't be called that because it was wrong. He definitely didn't fail to mention that he thought Regina was beautiful and he knew now why his mother had never stopped loving the other woman.

Had they really only been in Storybrooke for three days? It felt like so much longer and Emma wondered if that long drive from New York to Storybrooke was the reason for that. Four days since they left, three in Storybrooke and yet how many times had she thought of home, of work, of her life there aside from Granny and Ruby? Not once. Not unless it included memories of her time with Regina, the good ones and the bad ones.

She wasn't sure when she heard the voices inside die out and she barely flinched as Ruby sat down next to her and placed a cold bottle of beer beside her empty one on the step by her right foot.

"We have a lot of stuff to talk about," Ruby said quietly. "Henry is in bed."

"Did he—"

"I made sure he brushed his teeth, don't worry, Em. In fact I'm a little bit more worried about you."

"Me?"

"I haven't seen you look like that, not since…well, you know…" Ruby trailed off and she shook her head, taking a sip of her beer before continuing. "You have that look in your eyes, Em, the same one you had when you came back after finding out that Regina was gone. I didn't know what to expect when I came here today, but that? That I didn't think I'd see again."

"She hates me, Ruby."

"No, you can't believe that. Hate is such a strong word and—"

"She does," Emma sighed and she twisted the cap off her fresh, cold beer and took a hearty swig. "She wants me out of her town. She told me that. You should've heard the way she talked to me, Ruby. I—god, it killed me to hear her speak to me like that, like I was absolutely nothing to her, that if she could she'd probably just flick her wrist and send me out of town in a cloud of purple smoke or something."

Ruby laughed, but it was short and clipped. "Emma, she doesn't know what she thinks she knows. All you need to do is find a way to talk to her, to get her to listen to you, to finally hear the things you've been wanting to say to her for so long."

"How?"

"Didn't you say you had a plan? With those letters you never did send because you didn't know where she was?"

"A fleeting plan," Emma replied bitterly. "But, I don't know anymore. There's something I do want to know." She paused as she looked at her best friend and even in the darkness, the only light coming from the half moon shining rather brightly in the sky above, she didn't miss that worried look in fierce green eyes she knew too well. "How did you find her?"

"Granny did most of the work, like I told you. She caught me one day, trying to search for Regina while I was at work, caught me huddled behind the counter over her laptop. You know how much she freaks out if any of us even touch that thing. I told her what I was up to and she didn't ask me why, she just asked me if I'd found her."

Emma pressed her lips together as she stared at the woman next to her, her best friend, the woman who had become like a sister to her even long before Granny had taken her in as if she was her own child. She still couldn't believe that Ruby had known for months where Regina was and had left it up to her to find her in Storybrooke herself.

"As soon as I said the name, her full name, Granny snapped her fingers and was doing that thing where she talks a mile a minute, nothing that she says making sense as her brain wraps itself around an idea," Ruby said and they both laughed, knowing all too well of the many times Granny reacted that way over an idea that was put in her head or came to her suddenly. "She started talking about where she'd lived most of her life, of Storybrooke and the family that had run the town here for as long as she could remember and she told me a story about the Mayor's only daughter, a girl named Regina who loved horses and sneaking off to her restaurant to order root beer floats and french fries.

"Then the next thing I know, Granny is on the phone, calling up people she hadn't talked to in what, twenty-two years, asking them about the Mills' family. Turns out, when Regina left eleven years ago, Em, it wasn't just because of you. Her father was sick and her mother requested that she return home at once. Granny found out that her father was sick for a few years before he finally passed and the job, the title he had held, was handed over to Regina by everyone in this town without a second thought. Granny ranted for hours how she couldn't believe a woman like Regina, a young woman with zero experience could run the town she'd grown up in. I don't think I've ever heard her swear so much in my life!"

Emma couldn't help but laugh at that. The only time she'd ever heard Granny swear, was when she, with Ruby for support, told Granny that she was pregnant and how it had happened. The words "I'll fucking kill whoever drugged you. both of you. I'll fucking kill them" rang in her ears then, just thinking them and then it was when a two year old Henry sat in her kitchen, banging wooden spoons on her pots, that she grabbed Emma and dragged her out into the hallway; "If you don't stop him from making that absolutely incredulously unnecessary noise, I will fucking leap out of that window, so help me god, child. Now get him to shut the hell up right this instant or you'll be responsible from my impromptu suicide!" To be fair though, as Emma thought back to that particular day, Granny had been sick for days and yet still agreed to watch Henry while Emma went to her classes at the academy. She'd came back much later than expected to Granny just about to pull her hair out and she couldn't blame her. Henry, even at two years old, was completely stubborn and when told not to do something, he did the complete opposite.

"She had a couple people check it out, make sure it was the same Regina as your Regina," Ruby said, continuing after a few minutes of heavy silence between them. "It took a few days before Granny showed me the email with the newspaper clipping attached to it. As soon as I saw the picture, I knew it was her. She still looked the same as I remembered her."

"Yeah, she does," Emma said, smiling despite trying to control her fluttering emotions.

"Granny and I started talking, you know, shortly after that. About you, about your relationship with her and how we both knew you were still hopelessly in love with her and how sad you always were, especially whenever you thought about her," Ruby said and she frowned before taking a few sips of her beer, watching Emma carefully, waiting for some kind of reaction. One she never got. "When you mentioned that you had been planning for months to take Henry away for the summer, Granny told me that she had subtly put the idea of this town in your head a little while before you told us."

Emma rolled her eyes. "She didn't even tell you, did she? That she put the whole idea of Storybrooke into my head when it kind of slipped into conversation one night about where she'd grown up."

"Not until after you made the choice to go there, to take her up on her offer of coming here, staying at the cottage. If she wasn't my grandmother, I would have slapped her silly for keeping it from me!"

"My hand is feeling a little bit itchy, but I'm suppressing the urge to do just that to you right now, Rubes."

"I deserve it."

"No," Emma said gently. "You don't. Not really."

"If you had known, would you still have come here?"

"You already know the answer to that question."

"Okay, then if you had known sooner, would you have—"

"I don't know," Emma said, stopping her from even finishing her question. "I know I would've wanted to, but it's not like I could just stop my life in an instant and drive all the way up here just to see her. It wouldn't have mattered if I came months ago or now. She doesn't want me here, Ruby."

Ruby nodded and leaned up against the post to her right, facing Emma and watching her as she nursed her cold beer. Emma knew she was thinking, she knew Ruby that well that she could see the thoughts flowing through her mind just from the expression on her face alone. She waited until she'd drank nearly half her bottle before reaching out to poke at Ruby's leg with the tip of her shoe.

"What?"

"Tell me."

"Tell you what, Em?"

"Whatever your scheming brain is coming up with right now."

Ruby chuckled as she leaned forward, glaring playfully at Emma in the darkness. "I know where she lives."

"What?"

"And don't you need to know where someone lives to deliver a letter to them?"

"Where are you going with this, Rubes?"

"You asked me to bring the letters, claiming you had a plan, but in reality you don't. But I have a plan because I know where she lives."

"And exactly what are you suggesting I do?"

Ruby chuckled again as she shrugged nonchalantly. "Deliver the letters, one by one, in person."

"Bad idea," Emma replied with a shake of her head. "She'll probably tear it up right in front of me just to make some kind of a point, one she's already told me a few times that she does not want me in her town. In her life. Nothing."

"She says that," Ruby said knowingly. "But, does she really mean it?"

"Ruby, you didn't hear her—"

"No I know I didn't, but one of us has to have a little bit of hope that this whole plan with the letters thing is going to work," Ruby replied and Emma rolled her eyes. "Well, do you have a better plan, Em? Because as far as I can tell, we only got this one and between you and me, we're going to make this work. We're going to get Regina to finally see that she should've listened to you a long time ago."

"And what am I supposed to do? Walk around with these letters? What makes you think I'll even see her the next time I go into town?"

"You've already seen her three times."

"This first time she never talked to me when she saw me. The second time she drove out here to tell me to leave and the third time I approached her at the diner and that obviously didn't end very well."

"Have you met her mother?"

"No, but I did overhear her once when I went to Regina's, the woman sounded like—"

"A complete terror," Ruby finished. "Granny said we gotta watch out for Cora Mills. Apparently she'd fiercely protective of her daughter."

"Controlling would be the word I'd use from the things Regina told me a long time ago about her mother."

"You know what she looks like, don't you?"

"Faintly."

"So, at least we can avoid her if we're trying to get these letters to Regina, right?"

"We?" Emma asked with an eyebrow raised. "And while we're off doing this, who is going to watch Henry?"

Ruby flashed a guilty look at Emma before turning her attention up to the stars in the sky. "I think we really need to come up with a better plan."

"Yeah," Emma said, pausing to take a moment to look up at the stars in the sky as well and after a few long lingering moments, they turned to look at one another again. "Yeah, I got nothing, Rubes."

"Me neither. Except you know, her address," she said quietly as she pulled a folded and crumpled piece of paper out from the back pocket of her skin-tight jeans. She forced Emma to take the paper and she didn't look at it, instead just slipping it into her own pocket. "Come on, just try. At least once, Em?"

"So, what am I going to do? Just show up at her front door and hand her one of the letters?"

"It'd be a start."

"And which one do I even start with, there's dozens of them!"

"The first one you wrote."

Emma sighed heavily. While she'd had a similar plan, the more she thought about it, the more ridiculous she felt about going through with it. They were grown women, each had their own lives separate from one another and despite the fact that Emma still loved her, it didn't mean she had any right to try to…what exactly? Talk to her? Explain what happened eleven years ago? Somehow try to capture Regina's heart again, have her forgive her? To make Regina see what she was missing and fall back in love with her?

This is ridiculous. I feel like I'm eighteen all over again. How does this woman do this to me, even now?

For hours they sat outside, watching the stars, talking not just about Regina and the letters, but about what they'd do for the rest of the summer there in Storybrooke. Emma promised she'd take Ruby, with Henry in tow, out for breakfast the next morning, but even when she made that promise, she knew that Ruby was already hoping that somehow they'd run into Regina Mills.

By the time Ruby retreated upstairs to get some sleep, the long drive and the few beers making her far more exhausted than what she was used to, Emma settled down on the couch and listened to the sounds of the crickets chirping outside. She had told Ruby about the intensity of her memories of Regina and then proceeded to ignore Ruby's notions that the intensity of her memories were a sign that she was supposed to come here, that she was supposed to find a way to make Regina forgive her and make her fall in love with her all over again.

Emma shook her head just thinking about that. It was impossible. That woman was impossible and she'd been on the receiving end of her bitter hate one too many times to make her feel enough pain and guilt to last a lifetime.

Yet, despite that pain in her heart, her soul, she started to think about the time she did have with Regina, before everything completely fell apart. All those days and nights, all those loving words and touches, all the smiles that Regina flashed her way that made butterflies take flight in her stomach each and every single time.

Just like they were now as she thought about the woman she had never stop loving, never stopped dreaming about, never stopped wishing that she could take back everything that had happened just so they could find their happy ending together.

Wishing was useless. Emma knew that after a lifetime of making wishes that never came true. Wishing for a real family, wishing her parents would come back for her, wishing for true love, wishing she never hurt the woman she'd found that love with, wishing for a hundred different things and none of them coming true. Wishing was entirely pointless, a useless sense of false hope, but it still didn't stop her from making one last wish before she succumbed to the pull of sleep.

By morning and a rather dreamless sleep, Emma woke up with a stiff neck and to the sounds of Ruby and Henry in the kitchen. She glanced at her watch and groaned quietly, not realizing she'd slept for so long when it felt like she'd only just fallen asleep. She couldn't ignore the humidity that clung heavy in the air and made her clothes she'd fallen asleep in stick to her skin as she stretched out her sore body.

"Hey, you're finally awake," Henry said as soon as Emma had sat up on the couch.

"Yeah. Guess I am."

Ruby brought her a hot cup of coffee and waited until she shifted further down on the couch before she sat down beside her. "You know, that bed is big enough we could share it. You didn't look too comfortable sleeping on this couch and it wouldn't be the first time we've had to share a bed."

"Rubes, the couch is fine."

"No, it's not," Ruby said with a frown. "Come on, Em, what's the big deal?"

"We're grown women now, not a couple of teenagers sharing a bed because it was either that or one of us slept on the floor until Granny had bought another bed for me."

"What's bugging you?"

"Nothing," Emma replied as she held her coffee between her hands. "I just slept weird, that's all. It's nothing. Now, can you just drop it, please?"

"I like your car, Ruby," Henry said as he joined them holding a glass of orange juice. He made a point in sitting on the couch between them and smiled at both of them. "How much was your bet?"

"How do you know about the bet, kid?" Emma asked him as she playfully poked him in the shoulder. "Ruby, you told him?"

"Might've," she shrugged, grinning as she leaned forward to place her cup of coffee on the coffee table. "Let's just say it was enough for me to get the car."

"How much did that car cost you anyway?" Emma asked her, wishing they'd had this conversation the night before and not with Henry sitting between them. "Ruby, that care practically looks brand new!"

"It is," she replied, still grinning. "Relax, Em, I've been saving up for years and the bet gave me just enough to pay for the rest of it, okay?"

"How much?" Henry asked. "A hundred dollars?"

"Times that by about ten."

"Ten hundred dollars?" Henry asked, his face scrunched up as Emma's eyes flew open wide. "A thousand?"

"Yeah, a thousand," Ruby nodded and she took in Emma's expression on her face and couldn't stop the laugh that flew out. "Oh come on, Em, Granny thought she'd win! It was supposed to be a joke, you know? I got to tell you I was really surprised when she handed the money over the other day when I told her you'd figured out our little scheme to get you to Storybrooke and to find Regina."

"We're here because you wanted Mom to find Regina?" Henry asked.

"Yes."

"No!" Emma said over Ruby and she ignored the look that Henry gave her, the same look he always gave her when she tried to lie. He got that from her, she knew that and despite that, she hated it when he gave her that look. "Henry, go upstairs and get dressed. We're going to the Diner for breakfast."

"But, Mom—"

"Now," she said, her voice stern yet shaky as she lifted a hand to point a finger to the stairs. She glared at him, making sure she meant business and she couldn't watch him as he stormed off, grumbling under his breath as his feet trudged up the stairs loudly.

"What was that for, Em?"

"Nothing," Emma groaned quietly as she lifted the mug to her lips and took a sip. "Why did you tell him that, Ruby? You know why I came here! I didn't know you and Granny were conspiring behind my back to get me to come here because you knew she was here!"

"Emma, it's okay, I know you're mad—"

"Mad? I'm fucking pissed off that you lied to me!"

"It was more of a secret than a lie, Em."

"Same difference!" Emma nearly shouted, but she kept her voice down, not wanting Henry to see or hear just how angry she was feeling that morning. Angry and confused and hurt and upset. "I don't know what difference me being here is going to make. I don't even know what difference giving her these letters is going to make. It's been eleven years and she fucking hates me, Ruby. She made that point all too clear the other day and I really don't think I can take another round of her hate-filled remarks and rejection again. It just…hurts too much."

"She can't stay mad at you forever."

"She still is. Might as well be forever."

"Are you giving up?"

"No!" Emma groaned and she placed her mug on the coffee table. "Yes. Maybe, god I don't even know! Ever since I saw her that afternoon, I can't get her out of my head. I can't just forget about her. Just being near her again, seeing her, it's driving me crazy!"

"Clearly," Ruby muttered under her breath and she dodged out of the way of a playful slap to her shoulder. "Look, I know you too well. I know that if you don't at least try to get through to her before the end of the summer, you're going to regret it. If it doesn't work, then maybe you'll finally be able to move on, Em? Did you ever think about that?"

"I…" Emma faltered as she stared at her best friend. "You're right."

"Now go upstairs and shower and get dressed," Ruby said with a wide smile. "And make sure you wear something that makes you look smoking hot!"

"Ruby—"

"Come on, Em! Just put a little bit of effort into making yourself look damn good so when you show up on her doorstep, there's no way she's going to slam that door in your face, at least not for that minute you completely take her breath away."

Emma rolled her eyes at the unbelievable feeling that filled her. It was like they were teenagers again with the way they were acting and the way she was feeling. It'd been a long time since she'd felt like that and it was ridiculous. She was a grown woman, with a career and a son. She couldn't be feeling like some lovesick teenager trying to get her crush to notice her, because that's exactly what it felt like she was trying to do.

Yet it didn't stop her from dressing in her best, which wasn't a far cry from her usual wardrobe outside of work. A pair of black skinny jeans, which she knew she'd regret because of the increasing humidity outside, and a simple white tank top paired with her Converse sneakers. As she dried her hair with the towel, she stared at her reflection in the mirror and let out a soft laugh. This was the Emma that Regina had known years ago, and although she had filled out a little bit more and she looked older, she was still that Emma deep down and on the surface too, apparently, after realizing she'd chose that specific outfit because it was the way Regina remembered her.

"Em, really?" Ruby asked as she appeared in the open doorway of the bathroom. "It's like we just travelled back in time. Are you serious?"

"Well, I didn't exactly pack anything nice because I didn't know you two had secretly schemed to get me to come to Storybrooke because she's here."

Ruby held her hands up as she laughed softly. "It's okay, Em, I got to hand it to you, you do look hot right now. Did you bring any makeup?"

"Since when do I wear makeup?"

"Not even some eyeliner?"

"Ruby, you're pushing it."

"Pushing what?"

"The boundaries of what I'm comfortable with," Emma replied with a slight roll of her eyes. She ran her fingers through her damp hair as she turned to face Ruby instead of staring at her in the reflection of the mirror. She'd had been thinking while she showered and got ready, that maybe she might catch Regina at home. It was still early and there was no way she would leave the house before nine to get to the town hall where her office was. "I've been thinking."

"Yeah?"

"Why don't you take Henry in your car and I'll meet you two at the Diner. He can tell you where it is, although you definitely can't miss it."

"What are you planning, Em?"

"I'm going to do it," she said simply. "I'm going to knock on her door and…"

"And what?"

"Wing it?" Emma shrugged and Ruby laughed as she practically pranced towards her and flung her arms tight around Emma's neck. "No matter what happens, I will meet you two for breakfast, okay? Give me about a twenty minute head start and whatever you do, please don't tell Henry what I'm up to, okay?"

"You know he won't leave it alone until I tell him."

"Just…stall him for twenty minutes, please?" Emma asked and she slipped out of Ruby's tight hold, but only after she finally hugged her back. "I'll see you later."

Emma skipped down the stairs and grabbed the box of letters to Regina, flipping through the many envelopes until she found the first one she'd written to her, still sealed and slightly crumpled, the envelope slightly fading from white to yellow with age. She folded it carefully and slipped it in her back pocket before grabbing her wallet and her keys. With no sign of Henry around to see her slip out, she headed to her car and managed a tight turn on the gravel driveway.

Her heart was racing as she gripped on to the steering wheel and headed into town. In her other back pocket she had Regina's address that Ruby had given her and with some manoeuvring, she managed to pull the paper out as she sat at a stop sign just before Main Street. She checked the time on her watch, nearly ten to nine and the streets were already filling up with cars and people heading out to start their day.

Chewing on her bottom lip, Emma drove through a few streets before finding the one she was looking for. Five to nine, she groaned as she checked her watch again and hoped her suspicions were right when it came to Regina not leaving for work before nine. Maybe she'd just catch her on her way out? Or maybe, with the luck she had, she'd just miss her and could leave the letter in the mailbox and join Ruby and Henry at the Diner for breakfast and worry about Regina later.

She drove down Mifflin Street slowly, watching the numbers until she came to a stop in front of 108. Regina's black Mercedes was still parked in the driveway and there was no sign of the brunette anywhere. Emma put the Bug into park and slipped the keys out of the ignition, gripping on to the steering wheel tightly before she gathered up the nerve to get out of the car.

Emma walked along the sidewalk, looking up at the hedges that without a doubt hid her from being seen until she reached the gate. It squeaked quietly as she pushed it open and she didn't falter as she walked up the path and up the few steps to the front door. Her finger hovered over the doorbell and instead she curled her fingers into a fist and knocked three solid times.

All the worst case scenarios played out in her mind in the seconds that passed before she heard the lock click open. A hard slap to the face. More hateful words spat at her. Maybe even a call to the Sheriff's station to haul her away and kick her out of town, complete with a restraining order of sorts. The worst of it all would be to have Regina slam the door in her face, she decided just as the door made a soft click as it was opened slowly.

As Regina came into view, wearing a rather modest looking grey dress and black heels, Emma couldn't stop the smile despite herself as she looked into surprised brown eyes. Eyes that went from soft to angry in a matter of seconds as Regina realized who was standing on her front porch.

Emma scrambled to pull the letter out of her back pocket and she held it towards Regina, her eyes pleading as Regina glanced down at it, a wave of disgust and confusion marring her otherwise stoic features.

"Please, just read it, that's all I'm asking, Regina," Emma said quietly, waving the letter at her. "Please?"

"Why would I do anything of the sort?" Regina asked as she snatched the letter from Emma's hand quickly. "I told you. I care not to listen to whatever pathetic little explanation you've cooked up in that head of yours, dear. Now," she said as she made excruciatingly slow work of tearing up the envelope right in front of Emma. "Get off my property, Ms. Swan."

Emma stumbled back as Regina let the pieces of the letter fall to the ground and her heart clenched in her chest as Regina turned and slammed the door loudly behind her. Emma felt the tears burn in her eyes for a moment before she shook her head.

She hadn't expected anything else from the woman who's heart she'd broken. Why on earth would she have expected her to take the letter and read it?

She should've known that was exactly what Regina Mills would do. Rip it up to pieces in front of her, reminding her of the state both their broken hearts were still very much in.