Chapter 8 - High School Life
'Oh boy! It's the weekend! There's so much stuff I want to do today! I could go for a run, play ball, hang out with all the new friends I made at school! I'm so happy with my life right now, and it's only been one week since school started!'
Students whose minds entertain thoughts of that nature need to incarcerated.
I recognize that my claim could be mistaken for one of 'envy,' but rest assured, it is simply concern for the future of our species. Just think about the social evolution of humans. In the Stone Age, students like that would have been the ones to test the edibility of new foods. 'Reckless pioneers,' if you will, with no concern for the future. As a society, should we really be allowing people like that to flourish? In my opinion, the ones who understood 'eat berry, me die' are far more worthy of consideration.
But, that's not how life works. Instead, I'm stuck in a hospital playing old PNP games.
[hey~ :)] 12:07
An angel! Please, relieve me of this boredom!
[just wanted to let u kno i wont be on til 2nite. hanging out w/ friends atm !] 12:07
12:08 [eat berry go die]
[wat] 12:08
[tell me aobut it later hikio ok? g2g!‹3] 12:08
In the Stone Age, people like me probably ended up as wolf food. I wonder if modern wolves would be willing to oblige...
'Absence makes the heart grow fonder.'
I never really understood the logic behind that romantic idiom until I saw my computer setup for the first time in three weeks. It was difficult to suppress the urge to cry as all the little details came flooding back to me. The power button that only worked on the right side, the keyboard I spilled coffee on twice, the worn out mouse pad that needed to be replaced. The flaws that were usually a source of grief were somehow more comforting than new a unit with better specs. Like eating a home-cooked meal versus restaurant food.
Truthfully, my stay at the hospital wasn't too bad. Komachi visited after school when she could and brought things like my PNP and manga. Just having someone to talk to was a nice distraction from the gloom and doom of the hospital. Mom visited on the weekends to drop-off homework and checkup on me, though it felt more like a task on a to-do list at times. We basically had nothing to talk about.
Then there was Yumi. I probably spoke with her the most, as she called every night for to see how I was doing. As far as she knows, I had an unspecified 'accident' that made it impossible to play for the duration of my recovery. Getting hit by a car didn't seem like something to brag about. She kept me up to date with game news, the 'stupid tramps' and 'hotties' at school, homework. Fortunately, our homework was similar, so we were able to work on most of it together. I'm definitely getting a higher grade on my writing assignment, though. Yumi just doesn't understand the complex machinations of fine literature.
Soubu High School Grade 10, Class F
Hikigaya Hachiman
Mutualism is a crime against nature.
Organisms that engage in mutualism are robbed of their independence and identity as a species. In extreme cases like obligate relationships, where participants are forced to entrust their lives to one another, I'm sure it weighs heavily upon those involved knowing that their life may cease due to no fault of their own. Hence, mutualistic relationships are ones of fear and necessity, not mutual respect and appreciation.
Understanding the practical and social dangers of mutualism, it is my belief that commensalism is the pinnacle of symbiosis. A relationship in which one party benefits and the other is unharmed is the ideal relationship to pursue. It does not operate under the false pretense of fairness, nor does it dictate the lives of both organisms involved.
Therefore, I follow the teachings of the remora. Attached to sharks and safe from predators, they lead harmless lives free of worry. When its host is no longer able to provide for it, the remora can simply detach itself and seek new companionship without regard for the previous shark.
In short, I aspire to be a remora.
They say, 'Every time you sigh, a little bit of happiness escapes.' For the person in front of me, that was most certainly the case.
"Hikigaya, just because your eyes are reminiscent of a lazy fish, doesn't mean your way of life has to reflect one as well."
The tiredness with which she spoke almost instilled a sense of guilt in me for writing such a paper. It was akin to a parent scolding a child for doing something they were warned not to do.
"At this rate, you're going to sprout gills from your neck. Have you learned nothing from our previous meetings?"
"I think gills would be a beneficial mutation nowadays. When the ice caps melt and the sea level rises, people like me are going to be in high demand."
The life in her eyes faded further as I spoke. For whatever reason, a beautiful older woman staring at me like a piece trash was an experience more exciting than I cared to admit. A part of me wanted to try provoking her more, but the idea quickly died when I heard her cracking her knuckles.
"Take this seriously, Hikigaya."
Danger! Her once painfully seductive expression had morphed into a truly frightening visage; a warning that my next words needed to be chosen carefully.
"I-I feel as though I addressed the p-prompt adequately. W-Was there a-anything specific that needed improvement?"
My voice cracked. I wasn't prepared to defend my life after class. This was a hostile negotiation!
"Your biology teacher asked for a comparison of the three types of symbiosis, not social commentary! What were you hoping to accomplish by turning this in!?"
"To address the flaws of mutualism and foster an understanding of why commensalism is the superior form of interaction that all humans should strive for."
After scratching her head and gathering her thoughts, she said, "You know, it's not that I don't understand where you're coming from. You're at that age where the cynical and avant garde are most appealing, but please, try to reserve those opinions for when they're appropriate."
What followed was an uneasy silence; the type where you'd like to ask, 'So, am I free to leave?" but your instincts won't let you.
"Say, do you have any friends?"
"Yeah, one."
... Saying that made me want to die. Why did I say 'one' so proudly!?
"I see."
Her motherly eyes and somber smile that screamed, 'It's okay, I'll support you no matter what,' were almost too much for me to handle.
"In the future, try having him read through your assignments before you turn them in, okay?"
"... S-She's not really the type to appreciate the effort that goes into writing. To be honest, it's completely demoralizing having her read my papers."
Hiratsuka-sensei was the kind of person who could have an entire conversation without saying a word. Right now, she was obviously confused about something, but before I could ask what the problem was, someone interrupted us:
"Hey, Hiratsuka-sensei, can I have my phone back now?"
