A/N: Huge thanks to Channach and Raven Clark for beta-reading this story for me.
Reality
"Sir, I'm afraid I'll have to ask for a leave of absence."
Jack glanced up from the piece of paper he doodled on and looked across the briefing table at the woman sitting opposite him. That was odd. Carter never asked for leave of absence. If their superiors forced her to take it, she still stayed on base. Hell, the woman had a problem going home at the end of a regular workday.
Her gaze remained on General Hammond at the head of the table. After a moment of obvious contemplation, the general nodded.
"Of course, major. You are way overdue for personal leave anyway. I'm sure we can do without you for a few days."
"Actually, sir." Sam visibly swallowed. Jack studied her, his doodles forgotten. Something was off. Carter wasn't even looking at him. And why the hell did she go over his head without telling him she wanted to take some leave first? "I was thinking along the lines of one, maybe two weeks."
Weeks?
"I see." The general furrowed his brows. "Is there a specific reason?"
"No, Sir. I have some private business to take care of." It was enough to satisfy the general, yet vague enough to leave the actual reason unanswered. Not nearly enough to satisfy Jack.
"Alright. I think we can do without you for a couple of weeks. Can't we, Colonel?"
Jack snapped out of his thoughts. He cleared his throat and turned his head toward Hammond. "We'll manage, sir."
"Then that's settled. I'll put SG-1 on inactive duty. SG-3 can take over your mission to P28-3X1 tomorrow. If any of you have private business to take care of, now would be a good time. Dismissed, people."
Jack remained seating as Daniel and Teal'c stood up. He studied Carter as she packed up her files. Not one look at him—not so much as a glance. Yeah, red flags all over the place. That wasn't good.
She hadn't looked at him during the entire briefing. Matter of fact, she had avoided his company since this morning. Her greeting had been cold and distant.
His heart sped up. He'd messed up somehow, he knew it. He'd known it the moment he found her scribbled note in the kitchen. Crap.
He scrutinized her pale face now as she packed up her things. Dark circles lined her eyes. She looked exhausted, like she needed a break. What the hell was going on?
Carter got up and he followed suit. He ripped the piece of paper from the notepad—his doodles didn't leave a good impression for a superior officer during meetings. Then again, who listened to Daniel's fifteen-minute lectures without being bored anyway? Except maybe Carter.
She had to have seen him stand up because within a couple of seconds she was out the door. He rushed after her, only to run into Daniel.
"Jack."
"Daniel." Jack's gaze remained on her retreating back as she left. As always, impeccable timing, Danny-boy.
"I wanted to talk to you about at least considering one more mission to P4X—"
"Not my decision, Daniel." He focused on the archeologist, exasperated. "You heard Hammond. It's off the table."
"Yes, but if you went back in there and talked to him—"
"To tell him what? That some piece of ancient junk is worth ending up with a staff blast wound in our backs? Not gonna happen." Something about the way Daniel folded his arms and scrutinized him rubbed him the wrong way. Especially this morning.
"Jack."
He respected the archeologist—well, he tolerated him, most of the time—but sometimes Daniel didn't know when to let things go. With a shake of his head walked away, sticking his hands in his pockets. "SG-1 is on passive duty anyway until Carter's back. So why don't you…y'know…relax. Take it easy."
"Yeah, by the way, have you noticed something odd about her behavior? Did you two have a fight?"
Jack clenched his jaw. Great. Even Daniel had noticed her behavior was odd. It hadn't just been him. This was getting seriously out of hand. If others picked up on the vibes, he and Carter needed to fix it as fast as possible—whatever it was that was wrong.
He walked to the elevator and pushed the button, his hand scraping through his hair impatiently. When he reached Carter's lab, she wasn't there. Felger was. Another one of those annoying scientists he really didn't wanna see right now.
"Colonel O'Neill!" Felger straightened and attempted a pitiful salute, during which he almost stumbled over a box of books lying on the floor near the wall. "I… I wasn't expecting, I mean—"
"Where's Carter?"
"Um—she—um—left. Something about vacation? So for the next two weeks, I'll fulfill your every need."
Very. Disturbing. Image. A sardonic smirk crossed his face. "Yeah, doubt that. So, Carter left? We just ended a briefing five minutes ago."
"She said she was going to leave right after, colonel, Sir."
Crap. Shoulda seen that one coming. She was definitely avoiding him.
Beep—beep—beep—
Sam sighed and leaned over to look at the display of her cell phone.
1 missed call, 1 new voicemail.
She didn't have to check to know who it was from. Ever since she had left the SGC on Monday, Jack had tried to get in contact with her. Maybe just leaving like that was a bad idea. She should have come up with some fake reason and told him about it.
1 new voicemail.
Her thumb hovered over the call button for a second before she put the phone aside. She needed to hear his voice. Exactly why she shouldn't. Not even on her mailbox. The entire point of taking a break was to get back on track and gain some distance.
She dropped the book she was reading—some kind of weird new quantum physics theory she couldn't really get into—and slid out from under the woolen blanket. She itched to get out of the house. She needed coffee and beer anyway. A quick run to the store would provide her with just enough distraction to forget the message waiting on her phone.
She slipped into her shoes and grabbed her keys from the shelf. Warm as it had been recently, she didn't need a jacket. A little fresh air would help her clear her mind.
She pulled the door open—
—and ran into Jack O'Neill's hard frame, his arm reaching for her doorbell. His hands flew to her waist preventing her from stumbling.
She froze, blood rushing in her ears as she stared into his dark eyes. "S—sir."
"Hi."
Dark, intense eyes. A lopsided smirk. His warm palms sent pleasant shivers through her. Her eyes dropped from his face to her neighbor watering his plants on the other side of her fence. The man stared at them with obvious curiosity. She cleared her throat and stepped out of Jack's embrace.
"What are you—?"
"I called you a coupla times." He held up his phone.
"I wasn't home."
"I called your cell—five minutes ago."
Damn. Heat flooded her cheeks. Yeah, that was lame. She struggled for a believable reason, but failed. Her feet shifted back and she put her hand on the door.
"Can we not do this now?"
His gaze pierced hers. "Do what?"
What were the chances of him leaving if she just shut the door in his face? Granted it wasn't sound conflict-solving strategy, but what else was there to do? Him showing up at her door was surprising enough. His usual pattern was to avoid any uncomfortable conversation.
He had to have read her intentions on her face, or maybe he just knew her too well. His palm touched the door, not hard enough to force it open, but the gesture was enough to make her falter.
"Don't do that, Sam."
She closed her eyes. "Sir."
"We gotta talk about what happened."
"No, we really don't." Trying to shut the door would be futile. Not that he would force his way into her house, but his presence here showed his awareness something was wrong. How foolish of her to believe by distancing herself for a few weeks the problem would go away.
"Sam." Her eyes shot up to his when he drawled her name in a way that reminded her all too much of their Friday nights. "Whatever it was that I—" He scraped his hand through his hair, visibly struggling for words. "If I took things too far or hurt you, I'm sorry."
A lump formed in her throat. Never before had she seen Jack O'Neill so miserable. She had expected him to try and convince her to think over her 'break up', but she should have known better. He wouldn't do that. Their deal was if she wanted out, all she had to do was make use of her safe word. He was a man who stood by his word. All the more reason to love him. Damn.
"Sir—" Her voice trembled and she swallowed hard. She couldn't let him leave believing that he had done something wrong. Not when it was all her fault.
She closed her eyes and blew out a short breath. Why had this become so complicated? He deserved an answer. "You didn't do anything wrong and you didn't hurt me. It's me—all of it. I…" Her gaze locked with his. "I took things too far. I just need a few days, a couple of weeks maybe, to clear my head."
Hopefully, this would provide him with enough of an explanation. She raised her eyebrows when incredulity reflected on his face.
"Wait a minute, is this because you said you love me?" She remained quiet as he scrutinized her. "Oh fer crying out loud, Carter."
His tone made her snap to attention mentally and she gazed at him wide-eyed.
"You think we would've done any of this, if it was any other way?"
"What?" What was he trying to say? Sam stared at him, unsure of how to respond.
"This isn't the right place to talk about that, considering the audience." He motioned his head, indicating her neighbor.
Baffled, she opened the door wider and stepped back. It probably wasn't the smartest idea she'd had in while, but he was right. They had to talk about it before everything fell apart. And they had to do it without nosy neighbors watching them. Their working relationship and their careers depended on it.
Hugging herself, she walked back into her living room and the adjoining kitchen area. She didn't have to turn around to know he was following her. There was something about his presence she couldn't ignore. Not in the field, not on base, and not here in her own house.
"You want coffee?" It would give her something to do without having to look at him.
"No. I want you to look at me." He knew her too well.
With a sigh, she placed her palms on the counter. What a fool she'd been thinking she could play it cool, as though nothing happened.
"Sam."
She turned around. This wasn't going to be easy while she was looking at him. Her gaze fixated on him. She'd intended a glare, but it wilted; all she wanted was to feel him close, kiss him, taste his skin.
Damn, what is wrong with you? Since when had it become so difficult for her to remain focused when talking to a man?
"Nothing changed." His gaze intensified.
She blew out another nervous breath and shook her head. "Everything's changed." She swallowed hard, her fingers gripping the edge of the counter behind her. "This has nothing to do with you."
"No, I get that. You think you messed up." He shoved his hands in his pockets and looked around her living room. Sam observed him. What did he expect of her?
"Listen, Carter. I'm not asking you to change your mind about our…" He cleared his throat. "…about Friday nights. We're good. So don't throw away your career over it."
"I won't." She rubbed her arms. "I'll be fine. I just need a vacation, and afterwards it will be just as it was."
"As it was." His eyes narrowed. The repetition of her words came over as almost sarcastic and she looked at him startled.
"Yes, sir. Before we started, you know."
"Nothing's different now."
Okay, this was ridiculous. Somehow, they were going in circles.
"Why do you need a break?"
"What?"
"Not that hard a question."
Anger flared up inside her. For somebody who claimed not to want to convince her to change her mind, he was being awfully persistent. "I don't have to justify my vacation plans to you." Wow, that came over much snippier than intended.
His eyes flashed. "Excuse me?"
Why couldn't he just leave? She shouldn't have let him in. Her gaze snapped up to his and she clenched her teeth.
"Daniel's been bugging me about what's wrong with you for the past two days. He is convinced we had a fight."
"What?" Realization dawned on her. Damn, had it been that obvious? "Oh God." She closed her eyes and her body slumped. How had this happened? How had their game turned into something that made her feel like she was losing something vital to her being? The lump in her throat returned and her breathing shook as she looked at him.
He had to see the devastation in her eyes, because his gaze softened. "Sam. Tell me what freaked you out."
"What freaked me out is what I said Friday night." She glared at him. "We agreed this would be just about, you know, sex."
"We did." He nodded.
"And I took it further."
"So did I." He held her gaze intently.
"You never—"
"Two weeks ago, I asked you to call me Jack during our game."
He had. But it had been so natural given what they were doing. Besides… "That's different."
"The reason behind it wasn't."
Her jaw dropped.
"I love you. You love me. That hasn't changed since we established it three years ago." Jack averted his gaze. "Listen, I'm not expecting anything of you. You want it to end, so we go back to the way it was before. Simple as that. Don't ruin your career over it." He turned around and crossed the room to leave.
How could he…? How had…? Wait, had he just told her he loved her? A thrill ran through her and her stomach flip-flopped. "You accept it? Just like that?"
He stopped with a sigh, hands buried in the pocket of his jeans as he turned to her. "Carter." He drawled her name in a way that sent shivers down her spine. "It's kinda hard to trust someone as much as we've trusted each other in this if you don't love them. I thought that was self-evident."
"Oh." Um what?
Jack studied her face. Something on it must have told him she was completely lost. "You could have my ass for what we did last Friday. Sexual harassment, Coercion, Rape, Fraternization, Conduct Unbecoming and God knows how many other rules we broke. You tell me."
"What we did was consensual." She pushed herself away from the counter to walk towards him.
"It was." He nodded. "My point is, you think I'd risk my career for some sexual kink I could easily satisfy with a random acquaintance from a BDSM club?"
Her brain turned to mush as the implication of his words sank in.
"I wanted it to be you." He turned looking at the door awkwardly. "Anyway, I don't expect anything now, so..." He waved at the door. "I should go."
She started after him. "Wait."
He stopped again, eyebrows raised at her. She held his gaze, insecurity sweeping her off her feet. Damn, she sucked at this.
"Don't go." She pressed her lips together, struggling for words. "I—"
He turned to face her.
She swallowed hard, her palms rubbing against her jeans. "What if I didn't want just Fridays?"
His lips pulled into a lopsided little smile. "Saturdays too, then?"
The tension inside her evaporated on a soft little laugh. "Yeah… And maybe every other Sunday… when we're not off world."
He closed the distance between them, an amused twinkle in his eyes. "What about the evenings during the week?"
"Well, I don't wanna seem greedy, you know."
"That sounds like we'd have to re-negotiate our original deal."
"Probably." She flashed him a teasing smile and stepped back as he stalked toward her. "Do we keep game night on Fridays?"
"By all means. Unless you don't want to."
"Oh, I want to." Sam's fingers reached up to brush along his sides and up his back. "And the rest of the days we could just, you know, hang out."
"Go fishing."
She gave a breathless laugh. Her teeth nipped at his lower lip. "I'd like that... Jack."
"Wow." She felt him smirk against her lips, and leaned back to study him. "I thought I'd never get you to go fishing with me." His fingers played at the side of her waist, and his lazy caresses moved under her shirt.
Her breath hitched as his fingers made contact with her naked skin.
"I know it's not Friday. Or Saturday. Or Sunday." He smiled against her cheek and his words washed like warm caresses down the side of her neck.
"It isn't." She hissed in air when his tongue flicked the spot right under her ear.
"We might wanna seal our new deal though." His mouth moved back hers, and she opened for him with a gasp. His hand moved down to rest on her firm behind, applying gentle pressure to let her feel the growing bulge in his pants.
"Bedroom." Her fingers clasped his wrist, before she turned them both and began pulling him with her.
[CENSORED FOR EXPLICIT SEXUAL CONTENT! You can read the full version of this chapter on my website (the link to which is in my profile! Just click on my author name.). Thank you for reading and sorry for the hassle. I don't make the rules.]
"Damn, we're good together." Jack nipped her ear tenderly.
Sam closed her eyes on a breathless giggle. "You had doubts?"
"Hell, no. Just thought it was the right moment to point it out."
She laughed again. He pulled out of her and rolled over to lie on his back next to her. They both stared at the ceiling for a few seconds as Sam tried to regain her ability to think.
"So." Jack finally shifted to his side and looked at her. "How do you wanna do this?"
Sam turned her head. "What?"
"This. Us and work." He shrugged. "We should probably come up with a strategy."
"I can ask for reassignment to another SG-team."
He shook his head. "Won't work. You'd still be under my command. You know, same base and all that baloney."
"True." He was right, this was tricky. But then again she had known it would be difficult from the start. Maybe it was time for plan B. "The Air Force always wanted me to be more engaged with the sciences. Maybe I should ask for reassignment to the science department. I'd still be on the same base but in another line of work where you'd have no authority."
"No." He shook his head. "Science is a dead end career-wise. I'm not gonna let you sacrifice all you worked for. I'll resign."
"What? No, Jack."
"Carter." There it was, his command tone. She closed her mouth and looked at him. "I wanted to resign six years ago. I've played with the idea a coupla times since. Don't get me wrong, I love the job, going through the gate, the team and all that. But I don't need it to be happy."
She couldn't let him do that. Here he was worrying about her career, but what about his own?
Jack's gaze softened. "It's fine. I never aspired to make it higher than colonel. I achieved all that I wanted. Any position higher than this comes with lots of paperwork, politics, diplomacy—oh, and did I mention more paperwork? You know how I feel about bureaucracy."
She did. Damn, he didn't even read his memos. Yeah, she couldn't imagine him taking a desk job. Her fingers brushed his cheek and she sighed. "You're good as the leader of SG-1." Did that sound a bit too infatuated? Who cared.
"Yeah well, I can be replaced. It might be time I opened up the spot for somebody equally qualified. You're overdue for a promotion, Carter."
"No."
"No?" His brows shot up. "You don't wanna be promoted?"
"No, I do. It's just—" She shook her head. "We shouldn't talk about my promotion while we're lying in bed together. Naked."
"Right." He smirked. "It's not Friday yet."
She smacked his chest. "Jack, we're breaking the rules enough as it is without you suggesting that you'll promote me right after I f—" Her cheeks grew warm.
He raised his eyebrows, looking uncharacteristically interested all of a sudden. His low voice teased her. "Right after you fucked me?" His lips brushed the side of her neck. "It's hot when you put it that way."
"Jack, I'm serious."
He gave her a lopsided grin. "So am I. It's hot."
"I don't want you to advance my career when we're—um—doing this."
"Fer crying out loud." His palm grazed the side of her waist. "Did you think I'd go and convince Hammond to promote you? You should know me better than that."
"But you said—"
"What I implied was, if I resigned, you'd be next in line to get the spot on SG-1. The only reason you haven't been promoted yet is that there are no open spots for a colonel. Which would change if I left."
Of course. She should have known that he wouldn't directly advance her career. Still. "I don't think you should resign just for this."
"If by this, you mean us sleeping together, I think it's a little more than that. Right?"
"Right." She held his gaze. She couldn't let him give up his career for her. If he became bored or dissatisfied, he would blame her for it, and it might become a strain on their relationship. "I won't accept you sacrificing your life for me."
"Sam." He drawled her name, his tone sounding as though she had just said the most ridiculous thing. "It's my work, not my life. My life consists of fishing at my cabin, with a cold beer. An episode of Simpsons at the end of the day. And ideally, a hot blonde by my side." He gave a charming smile. "I'm not that complex. I'm a simple guy. And work is really just that for me, work."
"You wouldn't regret giving up your career?"
"I've done it before."
He had. But… "You came back."
"Because of Daniel," he said.
"You never left again."
"Yeah, well, all this getting called back into active duty got tiresome."
She cocked her head in mock-annoyance at his wry tone. How could he not take this seriously? While part of her rejoiced at the idea the solution to their problem might be that simple, the thought of never going through the Stargate again with him felt like a heavy weight on her chest.
Up to now, they had experienced everything together. They walked through the gate together on a daily basis. They knew they could rely on each other. At the end of the day, they could sit in the commissary together, eat blue jello and cake, and have a good laugh about the day's events.
She wasn't willing to give that up. Especially because him resigning meant she would be bound by her non-disclosure agreement. Even with him. No more discussing missions or proceedings. She wouldn't even be able to ask his advice. So what were her choices? Leave everything the way it was? Not a bad idea.
"You know, maybe you were right in what you said earlier. Nothing's changed."
He gave her a confused look.
"Well, technically we've been in a relationship for seven weeks. As you said, we've been in love with each other a lot longer. What's so different now? I think we've proven over the past years that we can separate work and our relationship. We did the past seven weeks."
His palm stilled on her waist. "Problem is, if the Air Force finds out, they won't care."
"We'll be careful." She smiled, trying to encourage him. "We've managed until now."
"Up until now it was just Fridays. We'd have to be in constant hiding."
"We'd have to anyway." She shrugged. "Even if you retired, it wouldn't be a good idea to let the Air Force know we're together."
"True." He tilted his head.
"It's your choice. We could just keep your retirement in mind as plan B."
"Plan B won't work out if we get busted."
He had a point, but then again it was a little late to worry about that, wasn't it? She lifted her leg over his hip to pull him close. "We'll keep work and private life separate and take precautions. You know, only meet at your place or mine. Take cabs. Just for another few years."
Jack looked at the ceiling thinking for a moment. After seven years of waiting, there had to be a way for them to make this work without sacrificing their careers. What she proposed wasn't perfect, and it walked a fine line.
But it was simple. He liked simple. And they had certainly proven during the past weeks that they were able to do what she suggested.
"Yeah, okay." He nodded. "At the first sign of trouble, I'll resign, though."
She beamed at him. Oh yeah, she'd be worth resigning for. Definitely. He indulged her in a series of hot, open-mouthed kisses.
A low vibrating sound made him pull back and look at her in confusion.
"Cell phone." She winced. "I put it on silent, cause I didn't—" She blushed. He considered taunting her, but chuckled.
"Oh drop the act, Carter. I know you were trying to ignore my calls."
"Sorry." Her apologetic smile warmed his heart. "I promise I won't do that from now on. Give me a sec."
She lifted herself up and reached into the back pocket of her jeans on the floor. She gave him a sidelong glance. "It's Daniel." She flipped the phone open. "Yes?"
Jack watched as she sat up abruptly and looked around.
"Now?"
His eyebrows shot up.
"With Teal'c?"
Okay, that was definitely his signal. He got up and started collecting his clothes from the floor as quietly as possible.
"Um, no. Star Wars is fine."
Oh, fer crying out loud. Annoyance surged through him, and he looked up at her. She shrugged with a wince. Sometimes, he wanted to wring Daniel's neck.
"Yeah, but you really don't have to. I'm fine, and I'm coming back to work on Monday."
Jack pulled the shirt over his head.
"No, I just needed a timeout. I was burnt out on all the missions and the work in my lab….. yeah, just working on my bike for a while."
Wait, what? Bike? Seriously? His head shot up to study her as images of Carter in leather and lace flooded his mind. Interesting turn of events. They should include that in their Friday night activities. He gave her a dirty grin. She cocked her head with a mock-annoyed expression, and threw her shirt at his face. He caught it and she tried to stifle a little chuckle.
"Yeah." Still the hint of a chuckle in her voice. He loved this woman. "It's ready for me to take a ride as soon as the weather warms up."
Hell, she could take a ride any time she wanted as far as he was concerned.
"No, I don't know where Colonel O'Neill is. If you want, I can call him."
He winced and pulled on his pants.
"Give me about half an hour to clean up my lot, okay? …Okay… see you soon." She hung up and lifted her head to look at him. "Daniel and Teal'c are on their way here for a movie night. Teal'c's bringing donuts. Apparently I looked so miserable they wanna cheer me up."
"Told ya." Jack growled. "Gotta give em that, their sense of timing is impeccable."
Sam jumped up from the bed. "I have to take a shower. And you have to leave. You can pretend that I called you, and then come back in an hour or so. Oh, and bring pizza."
"Pizza?"
"Yeah." She placed a sweet kiss on his lips. "Sex during the day makes me hungry, and since you're out anyway?"
He grinned against her lips. "Pizza it is. Any preferences?"
"Just cheese… get whatever you like."
He stole another quick kiss from her, before he remembered the pressing time schedule. He walked out of her bedroom as she pulled her shirt over her head.
He had almost reached her front door when she grabbed his wrist from behind. Jack turned and was surprised when she pulled him back against her.
"Sir." He groaned. Yeah, he'd have a problem remaining focused whenever she used his rank from now on. "Do we have a date tomorrow evening?"
"Yeah sure, ya betcha." He smirked and leaned in to give her ear a sharp nip. "I'm gonna wanna see you in leather and lace."
"I don't have any—"
"That's an order." Satisfaction spread through him when her breath hitched. She almost snapped to attention. "You have all day for shopping tomorrow. Personal day off, remember? Leather and lace, Carter."
"Yes, sir." She gave him that bright beautiful smile of hers that had made him fall for her in the first place.
"Good girl." He kissed her cheek softly. "I'll be back in an hour."
With those words, he left the house.
Teal'c watched as the archeologist next to him ended the call. He had heard most of the conversation.
"Should you not have told MajorCarter that we are in front of her house already, DanielJackson?"
"No, no I really don't think so."
Teal'c tilted his head in acceptance, one of his eyebrows cocked up. Tau'ri. Sometimes they didn't make sense. He had long come to accept that fact and stopped asking questions.
Only moments later, O'Neill hurriedly left MajorCarter's house to get in a car that Teal'c now recognized as his.
Daniel looked at him. "I really think we should give it a moment so that we won't barge in on something that either of us might be forced to report in the future."
Understanding began to dawn on Teal'c. O'Neill's presence here, and his hurried departure left little room for interpretation.
"Indeed." He gave a stoic nod and leaned back in his seat. He had never understood the Tau'ri rules and regulations that prevented O'Neill and MajorCarter from giving in to their romantic feelings for each other. They were both formidable warriors who had served their world on countless occasions. If they lived on Chulak they would have long earned the right to take each other as mates.
With a blank expression, he opened the big white box he was holding and held it over to DanielJackson.
The archeologist looked down with raised eyebrows, then shook his head. "Um, no thanks."
Teal'c placed the box back on his thighs and took out one of the donuts, before he studied the contents. Half an hour was a long time.
"We might be in need of another box of donuts, DanielJackson."
The End
This story will be continued in the "Leather and Lace" series, which will only be available on my personal website due to its explicit content. You can subscribe to posts on my homepage if you're interested in receiving those updates.
Also I realized, I forgot review response time last time. Sorry for that. I'll answer all reviews for chapter 6 and 7 here now.
REVIEW RESPONSE TIME:
Sequinn: Here you go, last chapter for this story. :D Thanks for reading!
ALIMOO1971: Sorry for not replying. You saw what Sam's fantasy was about, so I hope you enjoyed it.
louisa78: I haven't read "Fifty Shades of Grey" yet, just the first 10 pages. I couldn't get into it, mostly because of the first person narrator (the infamous I, which worked great in The Hunger Games and Divergent. Not so much in erotic fiction for me. ;) ). I have heard truly horrible things about it though.
Mostly about the relationship the two characters in the book have, and how abusive Christian Grey is. A friend of mine told me about some of the scenes, and if it's true, the emotional abuse was a bit disturbing. I definitely don't want to go along those lines with this story.
I also wanted to portray a somewhat healthy D/s relationship where it all is a game they're both supposed to enjoy. Jack respects Sam's limits—and if in future stories they break through one of her limits, it is always Sam who initiates it and signals Jack he can go along. There'll be nothing along the lines of "If you trust me, you'll do this" or worse "Don't you love me? Then why won't you let me do this?"
They are equal. The whole dominance/submission thing is only a fantasy, an illusion they both get off on. And it only works because at any moment either of them can stop the game should they feel the need to for some reason. That wouldn't end their relationship.
And yes, I love exploring Jack's dark side. If you love Jack's dark side just as much, you should read the first part of "Leather and Lace" which I've written already. That series is set out to be a lot darker—not where consent is concerned. But it involves a lot of Jack's darker sides. Sam just loves to play with fire I guess. ;) As she said in season 1, she always had a thing for the lunatic fringe. :P
fanka77: Holy Hannah is hopefully a good thing. :P
mmkbrook: Neither Sam nor Jack was in it just for sex—as this last chapter should have shown. However, Sam was the one overthinking the situation. It was never a question for Jack whether he loves her, or she loves him. He just took it for granted.
Sam on the other hand didn't, because it wasn't explicitly said. So she thought she was breaking the rule when she said it.
To me, Jack was always a lot more practical. He takes the situation as it comes. Same with feelings. So what, he loves Sam and she loves him. It's a bit of this typical male-female misunderstanding going on in there. Yes, I know, I was serving clichés but the idea behind it was to show Jack as a guy who doesn't need to hear (or say) "I love you" in order to believe it. Whereas Sam doesn't know that's the case yet—because Jack has never said it, except for at the za'tarc test—which was 3 years ago. ;)
dpdp: Thank you, I'm glad you like it! :)
TamaraJagellovsk: Hello, fellow German! :D I'm so glad you love it so much. You'll probably also like "Leather and Lace" on my website if you liked the "Fantasy" chapter so much. :)
mishy-mo: Thank you, I'm glad you like it! :)
Thanks everybody for reading and reviewing! I hope you enjoyed the story!
