Author's Note: This chapter covers the rest of the year after Lily and the Marauders graduated. The format of the story will remain the same, but now it will cover actual numerical years rather than school years. There's a little bit of everything in this chapter: sadness, happiness, action, and fluff. But not necessarily in that order. I don't think this chapter really needs any explaining. It's one of my very favorites, so hopefully you guys will enjoy it too.
1978
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry had officially been left behind. The spring term had been over for almost a week now, much to the delight of the fresh graduates. The Marauders, Lily, and Marlene had spent the last few days at the Potter mansion for one final hurrah. Tomorrow all but James and Sirius would be heading home to their own families. But for now they were savoring this one final chance to be together.
It was the middle of the afternoon, and they were all playing a Chasers-only version of Quidditch behind the house when Trina, the Potters' house elf, came out to tell them a visitor had arrived who wished to see all six of them. A few quick questions from James produced a description that sounded suspiciously like Professor Dumbledore.
"Do you think this is it?" Sirius asked once all six of them were on the ground.
They all knew what "it" was. They had discussed it during the final meeting of their "study group." Shortly before school ended, James and Sirius had gone in to see Professor Dumbledore and had laid out fairly bluntly their desire to aid in the fight against Voldemort. Dumbledore had neither confirmed nor denied his involvement with the Order of the Phoenix, instead saying in a seemingly off-handed way that he was planning to take a trip soon near where the Potters lived and that he might stop by for a chat. Something about the way he worded it had convinced both boys that this visit had to do with the Order and could very well be their way into the organization.
The six teenagers filed into the house, leaving their brooms on the rack next to the backdoor. They followed the cordial house elf up the right-hand side of grand staircase and down the corridor toward Mr. Potter's office. When they reached it, Mr. Potter and his wife were notably absent. But seated behind Mr. Potter's desk was the old Hogwarts headmaster.
There were two chairs in front of the desk, and Sirius motioned for Lily and Marlene to take them. He, Remus, and Peter all piled onto the leather couch back against the wall. That left James standing, but as the technical host of this little meeting, he hardly seemed to mind.
"Thank you, Trina," he said. "Would you please make sure we're not disturbed?"
"Of course," the house elf said.
She gave a small curtsy before leaving the office, closing the thick wooden door behind her. Once she was gone, James crossed his arms and walked over to stand behind Lily's chair. Then there was silence as they all waited for Dumbledore to speak.
"You all look quite well," he finally said. He directed a warm smile at each of them in turn. "I trust your first week as graduates has been well spent."
"No offense, Professor," Sirius said bluntly, leaning forward so his elbows were supported by his knees, "but I doubt you came out here to discuss our summer plans."
"Astute as always, Mr. Black," Dumbledore said. "You are quite right. My purpose here is of a much graver nature. In fact, the conversation we are about to have may not leave this room. You may not discuss it with anyone else aside from those currently present. This is for your own safety as well as the safety of any you might wish to tell. Do you agree to these terms?"
"We do, sir," James said. The silence of the other five proved their agreement.
"Very well," Dumbledore said. The jovial twinkle that seemed to perpetually inhabit his eyes had vanished, making it clear just how serious this conversation was about to be. The teenagers before him straightened unconsciously as they waited. "Before we begin, I would like to make clear that if any of you wish to leave this room at any time, you are perfectly free to do so. This conversation will be wiped from your memory and you will be free to go. Is there any among you who wishes to leave now?"
The six teenagers all looked at one another, and one by one, they shook their heads.
"We're staying," Lily told Dumbledore.
"We want to hear what you have to say," Remus added.
"Excellent," Dumbledore said. He leaned forward, resting his clasped hands on the desk in front of him. "Your graduation from Hogwarts has moved you into the adult world. You are no longer children, and I will not address you as such. You are well aware by now that there is a war raging in our world. One side wishes to destroy all it deems inferior in favor of creating a pure magical world. The soldiers of this side are known to you as Death Eaters. But there is another side to this war as well, a side that fights back against the Death Eaters and all they stand for. Some of you have indicated to me a desire to join in the fight against Voldemort. Is this sentiment true for all of you?"
"Absolutely," Marlene said without missing a beat. "We've all talked about it. We're in."
The other five nodded firmly in agreement.
"I had hoped you might say that," Dumbledore admitted. "Then if I may, Ms. McKinnon, allow me to tell you what exactly is it you are attempting to get yourselves into. As I said, Voldemort possesses an army. But there is also an army standing against him. It is called the Order of the Phoenix. An organization of witches and wizards sworn to stand against Voldemort's army in any way they can, thereby defending the freedom of the magical world as well as the Muggle world."
"And you want us," Sirius said eagerly.
"There has been some question about the possibility of your recruitment, yes," Dumbledore told him. "Several of you have already been recommended by other members of the Order."
"Wait, there's people in the Order who know us?" Peter asked in surprise.
"There are indeed," Dumbledore said. "However, I am not at liberty to disclose their identities to you at this time. But know that, when asked about your character, they gave quite impeccable references. Of course, there is also the matter of your 'study group' as you called it."
Six sets of eyebrows nearly hit the roof.
"How did you…?" Lily began, glancing briefly at Marlene beside her.
"I know a great deal about what goes on at Hogwarts," Dumbledore told her with a hint of a smile. "Indeed, I know far more than my students realize."
"If you knew," James asked carefully, "then why did you let us keep doing it?"
"Because I was afraid that we might one day need the skills you were developing," Dumbledore said. The smile had vanished from his eyes, leaving behind a weary old man. "In fact, the initiative you showed in practicing together is the main reason your names were considered."
"So it was like a test?" Remus asked. "Did we pass?"
"With flying colors," Dumbledore told them. "Your efforts are also the reason this little interview is happening collectively rather than individually."
"An interview?" Sirius pressed. "So we're in?"
"You are on the threshold," Dumbledore corrected. "Whether or not you walk through the door before you is entirely up to you. However, before you decide, I must warn you that life in the Order is not as romantic as it sounds. You would be in the frontlines in the war against evil. I cannot guarantee your safety, nor that of your loved ones. Any one of you could be injured or killed. Or worse."
"There's worse?" Peter asked with a gulp.
"When dealing with dark magic, I'm afraid there is far worse," Dumbledore told him.
Peter suddenly looked as pale as a sheet. There were no snide remarks or snappy jokes from the others either. All six teenagers were sitting perfectly still as they waited for Dumbledore to continue. And continue he did.
"The Death Eaters are formidable opponents," he said gravely. "The magic they use is often vile, and for many of them, there is no line they will not cross. If it were to be discovered that you had any connection with the Order, the lives of your loved ones could be in great danger. Many of our members are in hiding to protect their families. Some have been gravely injured while on missions. Some have been captured and tortured to death. Others have watched their friends being savagely murdered in front of them. This fight is not an easy one, nor is it without cost. One or all of you could lose your lives to it. I do not say this to frighten you. I only wish to impress upon each and every one of you the reality of what we face. There are dark times ahead, and it is up to you to choose what part you will play in them. It is not a choice to be made lightly, nor is it one that someone else can make for you. School is over. There are no more professors or parents telling you what to think. The time has come to stand on your own feet. Each of you must now decide for yourselves what it is that you believe in. And how far you will go to protect it."
The room was so quiet a pin drop could have been heard. For a long moment, none of the teenagers moved. They sat with furrowed brows as they carefully processed Dumbledore's words. James was the first to react. He put his hand on Lily's shoulder, causing her to look up at him. Something passed between them, and then she nodded.
"I'm in," James said, looking up at Dumbledore. He said it in a low voice, but in the silence of the study, it sounded almost like a shout. Like a loud declaration of war.
"So am I," Lily said immediately.
"Count me in," Sirius said. For once there was not so much as a trace of humor in his face. He spoke the words as solemnly as one would a sacred oath.
"Me too," Marlene said firmly.
"And me," Remus echoed.
There came a brief but deafening silence during which it seemed the entire world was holding its breath. And then Peter said with a slight tremor in his voice, "I'm in too."
Before Dumbledore could speak, Lily had turned around as far as her chair would allow. Her gaze seemed to bore into Peter where he sat on the sofa with hunched shoulders and trembling hands.
"Why?" she asked.
"What?" Peter asked in surprise.
"Why are you in?" Lily clarified.
"Lily," James began quietly, but Lily shrugged his hand off her shoulder.
"I'm not saying you can't do this," she said to Peter. "In fact, I'm pretty sure you could. But I want to know why. I've heard everyone else say why they want this. To do the right thing. To protect their families. But every time it comes up, you go quiet. So why, Peter? Why do you want to do this?"
"Lily," James repeated in a stronger tone.
"No, he needs to know why," Lily said firmly. "And if he doesn't, then he shouldn't be here."
The entire office was deadly silent. Remus in particular seemed highly uncomfortable as he stared down at the floor. Peter looked nervously at James and Sirius, but neither of them spoke. Marlene too was silent.
"I…" Peter began. He trailed off, too flustered to find any words.
"I'm not trying to put you on the spot here," Lily said in a gentler tone. "But I've stared a Death Eater in the face before and I froze. I was terrified. What's out there is terrifying, and it's dark, and no amount of training in a secret passage is gonna prepare us for that. When you find yourself in the thick of a battle with curses flying everywhere and a Death Eater bearing down on you, you're gonna want to run. Not because you're weak or a coward, but because it's the smart thing to do. The only thing that's gonna let you stand your ground in that moment is gonna be knowing what you're fighting for. And if the only reason you're there is because your friends did it, that won't be good enough. You can't just do this because everyone else is. Like Professor Dumbledore said, it's time to stand on your own feet, Peter. If you do this, it has to be because of you. So why do you want to do this?"
All eyes were now on Peter as they waited for his answer. But he didn't crack under the pressure like some of them were expecting. He didn't fidget or wring his hands. Instead, he straightened his back and looked Lily straight in the eyes.
"For me," he said. It was quiet at first, but then he set his jaw and his voice grew stronger. "I'm doing this for me. You're right. I've spent my whole life tagging after other people. Doing whatever they did. So this decision I'm making for me. I want to do something good. Something brave. Something that matters. Not because my friends did it, but because I knew it was right. Because I had the courage to do what needed to be done, no matter how terrifying it was. So I'm doing this for me."
Lily gave him a weighing look, and then the corner of her mouth pulled up into a smile.
"That's good enough for me," she said.
"Me too," Sirius said, clapping a proud hand on Peter's shoulder.
All eyes turned back to Professor Dumbledore to find that he too was smiling a little.
"Spoken like a true Gryffindor," he said to Peter. "Very well. If you are all completely certain-"
"We are," James interrupted.
"-then I will inform the Order," Dumbledore said. He stood to his feet, and his former students instinctively did the same. "In the next few weeks, you will each be contacted by a member of the Order with whom you are familiar. They will take you each in turn on a trial mission where your capabilities will be evaluated and your commitment to this cause will be put to the test. At that point, you will then be given one final chance to either withdraw and have all related memories wiped from your mind or to continue and be sworn in as a member of the Order."
"That sounds like a pretty intense initiation," Marlene admitted.
"We are at war, Ms. McKinnon," Dumbledore pointed out. "And you are all signing up to be soldiers. We must make sure you are fully equipped before we send you into battle."
"We'll be waiting," James said. The others all nodded in agreement.
"Excellent," Dumbledore said. "Then I will get the ball rolling, as the Muggles say. Now if you will excuse me, I would like to have a far more mundane conversation with Mr. and Mrs. Potter before I go."
"I'll take you to them," James offered, moving to open the door.
"That's quite alright," Dumbledore said. "I am more than capable of seeing myself out. And I believe you all have much to discuss."
He stepped around the desk and headed toward the door.
"Good-bye, Professor," Lily said when he reached it. The others quickly echoed her words.
Dumbledore turned around long enough to give them an acknowledging nod and a smile. Then he disappeared down the hallway, leaving the six teenagers alone. For a moment there was only silence in the study. Finally Lily sat back down, and the other followed suit.
"Blimey," Sirius said once they were all seated. "We're in."
"Not quite," Marlene pointed out. "There's still that mission thing. And they can always just use the Confundus Charm and make us forget all of this."
"They won't," James said confidently.
"You okay, Remus?" Lily asked. The werewolf was frowning down at the large ornate rug on the wooden floor, but he looked up as she spoke.
"It just all feels so real now," Remus said. "There's a war out there. And we're in it."
"We were already in it," James pointed out.
"But it's different now," Remus insisted. He looked them each in the eye in turn. "I know this is the beginning of something, but it also feels like an ending."
"It's like Dumbledore said," Peter said quietly. "We're not kids anymore. We're soldiers."
The thought was indeed a sobering one. Silence fell again as they all let that thought soak in. It would be some time before any of them spoke again.
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It was supposed to be a simple mission, which was the main reason Lily and James had been allowed to go. Despite having proven themselves quite adequately, they were still considered too green to be sent on their own missions just yet. Instead, they had been sent in as back-up for newlywed duo Frank and Alice Longbottom. Both Longbottoms were highly talented new aurors, which made them perfect as teachers. But they were also fellow Gryffindors and old friends, having graduated three years before Lily and James.
The mission's goal had been fairly straightforward – stake out a suspected Death Eater meeting and hopefully get some names to add to the Order's list of known Death Eaters. It should have been observation only. The meeting was supposed to be mostly Death Eaters who were further down the ranks, so Frank hadn't expected there to be too much trouble. And for the first thirty minutes, he had been right. Then all hell had broken loose.
Looking back on it later, none of the four would be entirely sure just what had happened. One minute they had been crouched safely in the cover of the trees, and the next minute the Death Eaters were on them. Spells were flying everywhere, lighting up the dark woods. A few of the trees burst into flames as they were struck by fire-related curses. Everyone was shouting and running. It was impossible to tell what was going on.
When it became clear that they weren't going to be able to fight their way out, Frank yelled for everyone to Apparate to the rendezvous. Lily did it without question. There came a horrible but familiar squeezing sensation, and then she was standing in front of the agreed safe house. It was out in the middle of a cornfield, which made it feel as if it were in the middle of nowhere. Alice appeared right behind Lily, and then Frank a second later. The couple immediately caught hold of each other in a tight hold. Lily's eyes scanned the field, but there was no sign of James.
"Where's James?" she asked the Longbottoms. It was a miracle her voice shook as little as it did.
"I thought he was with you," Alice said, looking up at Frank.
"I lost sight of him in the trees," Frank admitted. Something passed between them, and Lily's slamming heartbeat turned to a dull roar in her ears.
"I'm going back," she said.
She turned on her heel, fully prepared to Apparate, but Alice caught hold of her hand.
"It's not safe," Alice said strongly.
"I'm not leaving him out there," Lily informed her. "He could be hurt."
"Or he could be fine," Frank pointed out. "There are a hundred possible reasons he's not here yet. Maybe he saw a chance for some intel and he took it. Maybe he had a stowaway when he Appareted, and he's laying low to make sure he lost them."
"Or maybe he's dead," Lily choked.
"He can handle himself, Lily," Alice said, giving Lily's hand a squeeze. "Let's give him a little time before we start to worry."
"We'll go in and make some tea," Frank said calmly. "If he's not here when we finish it, then I'll go back and look for him myself."
Still, Lily hesitated. She looked pleadingly at Alice, who had become something of a surrogate older sister to her during their shared years at Hogwarts. Alice nodded encouragingly.
"Okay," Lily whispered.
Alice released Lily's hand and instead wrapped her arm around Lily's shoulders.
"Come on," she said, steering Lily toward the house. She glanced back over her shoulder, and Lily got the very distinct impression that Alice and Frank were having a silent conversation. She was also quite sure that she didn't want to know just what exactly it was they weren't saying aloud.
The house they entered was old and rarely used, so the interior was a bit faded. Alice led Lily past the rickety staircase and down the hall to the living room, motioning at a worn sofa. Then she headed into the kitchen. Frank used his wand to light a fire in the fireplace before going to join her. He opened one of the cabinets and pulled out three mugs while Alice put a kettle on. Under normal circumstances, Lily found the sound of boiling water quite comforting. Tonight, however, it just served to make her more agitated. She started to pace the frayed and faded rug, careful to keep an eye on the small clock over the fireplace as it ticked from one minute to the next with maddening slowness.
Thirty minutes later the tea was gone and there was still no sign of James. Lily was on the verge of pacing a hole through the rug. Frank and Alice were both sitting quietly on the lumpy sofa. Its upholstery was worn in places, revealing white stuffing. Alice had tried several times to get Lily to sit, but she finally seemed to have given up. As the clock struck ten, Lily could feel herself giving up as well.
"Alright," Frank said, setting down his empty mug. "I'm gonna go look for him."
He gave Alice a quick kiss before getting up from the couch. Lily met his eyes, and he nodded as he walked behind the couch toward the hallway. A moment later the door closed behind him. Silence reigned briefly, broken only by the ticking of the mantle clock.
"I can't take this anymore," Lily muttered. "I'm going with him."
She crossed the rug on her way to the door. Alice quickly set down her mug on the floor and got to her feet, clearly meaning to intercept.
"Lily, wait," she called.
"No, I'm not waiting another bloody minute!" Lily yelled. She swung around, a mixture of anger and fear contorting her face. "James is out there! I couldn't live with myself if something happened to him and I'd done nothing to help!"
"And he couldn't live with himself if something happened to you," Alice said as she came around the sofa. She calmly placed her hands on Lily's upper arms. "I know what it's like for the person you love to be out there and for you to have no idea if they're alive or dead. But you running right into a trap is not going to help James. He's smart, and he's a very talented wizard. He knows what to do. And this? The waiting? This is the worst bit. Especially the first time. It gets easier after this, I promise. It never truly goes away, but it does get more bearable. And most of the time they do come home."
The anger had slowly faded from Lily's face as Alice's words sunk in. Now she could feel her eyes beginning to burn as the fear took over. Part of her almost wished Alice had lied and assured her that James would come back safe, but another part of her was immensely grateful for Alice's honest nature.
"I can't lose him," Lily whispered.
"I know," Alice said with a sad smile. "Believe me, I know. But Frank's good at this. If James is out there, Frank will find him."
Lily forced herself to nod, but she could feel tears welling in her eyes. Alice opened her arms and hugged Lily to her. Lily's hands took tight hold of the back of Alice's jumper as she tried to pull herself together. She refused to let her tears fall. Not like this. Not when Alice had probably been through far worse. But Alice didn't berate her for being weak. Nor did she offer false promises about everything being alright. She just held on tight, letting her silent understanding anchor Lily.
They had only been standing like that for a few seconds when the front door opened again. Lily immediately tensed in Alice arms as they both held their breath.
"Oi!" Frank's voice called from the hallway. "Look who I found out here."
Lily pulled away from Alice and dashed into the hallway, her heart slamming in her chest. She skidded to a halt on the creaky wood floor beside the decaying banister and stared. There was Frank with a weary grin on his face. And there behind him, bruised and dirty but mercifully alive, was James.
"Sorry I'm late," he said wearily.
That was all the talking he had time for because Lily suddenly sprang into motion. She practically flew the last few steps to the door and flung herself at James. The force of the impact knocked him back a half step. Lily's arms locked themselves around his neck, and the tears she had been fighting finally broke loose. James put his own arms firmly around her as he buried his face in her hair.
"Don't you ever do that to me again," Lily choked around her tears.
"I'll do my best," James promised.
Lily forced herself to pull away so she could look him up and down. There were a few minor bruises on his face, but otherwise he seemed fine.
"Are you okay?" she asked, looking up at him through damp eyelashes.
"I'm fine," James assured her. "Frank and I were separated, and I had to circle back towards the barn. Turns out there was an Anti-Disapparition Jinx on it. I had to lay low until the Death Eaters left and I could get clear of it."
"Well, we're glad you're alright," Alice's voice said.
Lily turned to see that Alice had entered the hallway, and she and Frank were both smiling.
"So am I," James said with a light chuckle.
"I'll go reheat the kettle," Alice told him.
She slipped her hand into Frank's, and the two of them headed back toward the kitchen. Once they were gone, Lily turned back to James, who gave her his best disarming smile. But instead of smiling back, Lily punched him in the arm.
"Ow," James cried, although it was more from surprise than pain.
"That is for making me worried sick," Lily told him sternly. Then her expression softened. "And this is for coming back in one piece."
She put her hand on his neck and tilted his head down so she could press her lips to his in a small kiss. James was grinning when she pulled away.
"Maybe we should get separated more often," James teased.
"Don't you dare," Lily warned. She wrapped her arms around his neck in another hug. "I love you too much to lose you, James Potter."
James put his own arms tightly around Lily.
"I love you too, Lily Evans," he told her.
Lily let her eyes drift shut in contentment. Yes, there was a war going on, and yes, they could easily have died tonight. But they hadn't. They were both alive and well. And for now, that was enough.
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It wasn't really until the first of September when none of them packed their trunks and boarded a magical train that it really truly sunk in that they had left Hogwarts behind for good. It was around that same time that the war finally began to get to Lily. But it wasn't exactly in the way one might have expected. She wasn't sick of the missions and the fighting and the close calls. In fact, she found it all exhilarating in its own way, although she would have given it up in a heartbeat if it had meant the end of the war. And she wasn't haunted by the faces of the dead or kept up at night terrified that evil would someday drown the world, although she had certainly had her fair share of sleepless nights as well as dreams haunted by the deaths of loved ones. No, what finally got to Lily was how normal it all seemed. Or more accurately, how far from normal she had really come. She was eighteen, for Merlin's sake! She should be spending her nights out partying and doing stupid things that she would regret later, not going toe-to-toe with dark wizards. In short, she felt more like a soldier than a teenager. And while that shift might have been necessary, it didn't stop Lily from occasionally missing normal.
She said as much to Sirius one day while they were laying out on the grass behind the Potters' house. After joining the Order, Lily had only stayed with her parents for a few weeks before inventing some magical job and moving in with the Potters. Muggle attacks were increasing, so it was safer for her family if she stayed away. The Potters had been extremely good about it and had given her a bedroom of her very own. Sirius was still living there as well, and since he and Lily now shared a much smaller dinner table and common room as well as a bathroom, they had been spending a fair bit more time together. James had been unexpectedly called up the night before as a last minute stand-in on a raid, his parents had gone out that morning on business, and Trina the house elf was busy cooking. And so it was that Sirius and Lily, left to their own devices, came to find themselves laying on the back lawn discussing their lives.
"I just miss being normal, you know?" Lily said as she stared up at the clouds floating lazily overhead. A cloud of a completely different kind drifted past as Sirius released a puff from his cigarette.
"Were you ever really normal?" Sirius asked drily. "You were performing wandless magic at the age of nine, for Merlin's sake."
"You know what I mean," Lily said. She pushed herself up on her right elbow and rested her head against her hand so she was looking down at Sirius. "I miss being able to wander down a street of shops without always looking over my shoulder. To be able to go to a pub and have a few drinks without worrying that the bloke in the corner might be a Death Eater. Sometimes I just wish I could have one day, just one, where I could pretend we're not in a war. That's all I want. Just one normal day."
Sirius inhaled deeply and released a thoughtful puff of smoke.
"What if I could give that to you?" he asked, looking up at Lily. "One completely normal day?"
"What are you saying?" Lily asked suspiciously.
Sirius took a final puff from his cigarette and pushed himself up into a sitting position before looking back at Lily.
"I'm saying that I have a perfectly Charmed Muggle motorcycle that's doing nothing but gathering dust," he explained. "How do you feel about taking a little trip?"
"I don't know," Lily said slowly. "We're not really supposed to leave the house without clearing it with someone."
"Who would know?" Sirius asked. He gestured at the nearly empty house behind them. "No one will be back until at least supper. We could go out, find a nice Muggle village with no wizards in sight, hit up a few pubs, have a few laughs, and be back before anyone even knew we'd left. We wouldn't even need to use magic. A perfectly normal day, and no one would ever have to know."
The responsible part of Lily, the part that had gotten her the position of Head Girl, silently pointed out that this might not be the best course of action. But a larger part of Lily, the part that had scared the snot of Mulciber in third year Charms, insisted that she deserved to have a little fun. Besides, what could possibly go wrong? (A lot of things, as the responsible part of her pointed out. But it was by far the smaller voice and was therefore easily silenced.)
"Alright," Lily said as a grin spread across her face. "Let's do it."
"Brilliant," Sirius said, returning the grin. "I'll get the motorcycle."
It turned out that the motorcycle in question was Charmed to both go far faster than it should and also to fly. (Apparently it had also been christened the summer before in an incident with the Muggle police, but Lily wasn't entirely sure she wanted to hear the details of that story.) The vehicle was in pristine condition since Sirius cleaned it up almost every weekend. James had even taken to referring to it as Sirius' baby. The sleek black machine was shining like new when Sirius brought it out onto the front lawn of the Potter house. He climbed onto the seat, and between his shoulder-length hair and his black leather jacket, it looked to Lily as though he had been born for that motorcycle. She sat down on the pillion seat behind him and was about to ask if he had a helmet when Sirius gunned the engine. Lily had just enough time to lean forward and wrap her arms around Sirius' waist before the bike took off.
Riding a motorcycle was amazing. The feeling of flying was also amazing. But putting them both together by riding on a flying motorcycle was beyond incredible. Sirius let out a loud whoop as they soared through the air. Even Lily found herself laughing as she leaned back and let the wind toss her long hair. Suddenly the war seemed a world away. In that moment, they were completely free.
Sirius brought them literally back down to Earth after a while, and they tore down the English country roads without a care in the world. A combination of magic and skilled driving eventually brought them to a small town on the coast. It was a quaint little place that smelled of salt water, home brewed ale, and country contentment. The population was just small enough to not attract any mainstream attention but just large enough that a few strangers passing through wouldn't be noticed. And there didn't seem to be a hint of magic anywhere.
There were only three pubs in the town. Sirius and Lily ate some fish and chips at the first one and had themselves a good drink before moving on to try the brews at the other two pubs. The last of the three was playing music despite the fact that it was all but empty. Sirius took advantage of it by pulling Lily to her feet and forcing her to dance, much to the amusement of both Lily and the barkeep.
In between the three pubs, they wandered the town. It was incredibly refreshing to be able to walk down the street without worrying. Several of the shops were family-run businesses boasting crafts that could be traced back for generations. A shop with wooden carvings proved to be particularly awe-inspiring. It was the shop of homemade candy, however, that truly stole their hearts. Sirius in particular was deeply impressed by the tasty ingenuity of the Muggles. There was also a record store that they browsed, although Sirius had no idea who most of the Muggle bands were. He had to practically drag Lily out of the bookstore. Most of the volumes it held were old and yellowed, and the smell of dusty old books was like a fine perfume to Lily. The allure was completely lost on Sirius, who kept sneezing.
Lily had thought to grab a magical camera before they left the house, and they put it to good use as they explored the small town. Pictures were taken in front of nautical shops, eating their greasy fish and chips, standing on the rim of the town's lone fountain, drinking in the pubs, swinging around old lampposts, and skipping down the cobblestone streets. Sirius performed a few feats of very simple magic to entertain some young Muggle boys, and Lily snapped several pictures of their awed faces. He retaliated by taking a picture of her kissing the metal cheek of a statue of the town's founder.
Before they knew it, afternoon was giving way to evening. They spent the last of Lily's Muggle money on a fancy nautical pipe with a ship engraving for Sirius and a blue and white striped scarf and a bronze compass necklace for Lily. Then they climbed back on the motorcycle and headed back down the road in the direction they had first come. Once they were far enough away, Sirius took the motorcycle back up into the sky. The trip was much quieter than its predecessor. Sirius and Lily spent most of it in contented silence rather than laughing into the wind. Somehow that actually made it seem shorter.
The blue sky was starting to look like a spilled box of red, orange, and pink paints by the time they finally touched down in front of the Potter house. Sirius and Lily silently climbed off the motorcycle and headed inside. They stepped into the large entryway to find all three Potters standing there. Busted.
"Thanks goodness you're alright!" Mrs. Potter cried in relief. "Where have you been?"
"We went out," Lily admitted slowly. Something about the tense expressions on the faces in front of her was setting off alarm bells in her head.
"Do you have any idea how irresponsible that was?" Mr. Potter demanded. He almost never got worked up. Something was definitely wrong. "Anything could have happened to you."
"This isn't the time, Dad," James said. He was watching Lily with worry in his eyes.
"Alright," Sirius said suspiciously, drawing the door closed behind them. "Why the long faces?"
"You don't know?" Mrs. Potter gasped. Her hand flew to her mouth, and Lily noticed a crumpled handkerchief clutched tightly in it.
"Did someone die?" Lily asked worriedly.
The three Potters shared a look that made Lily's blood run cold.
"Who?" Sirius asked in a tight voice.
"Lily," James said, taking a step forward. He looked up, and somehow Lily knew what was coming before the words even left his mouth. "Your parents… They were in a car accident this morning. They died on impact. Dumbledore found out somehow and sent word to Dad…"
He trailed off, unable to make himself go on. Lily could only stare in shock. It wasn't possible.
"Dumbledore sent the Prewett boys down to investigate," Mr. Potter said after clearing his throat. "See if maybe there was magic involved. But they seem to think it was just an ordinary accident-"
He stopped talking as Lily shook her head.
"No," she said fiercely. "No, you're wrong. They can't be dead."
"Lily," Sirius said from behind her. The gentle tone in his voice was such a foreign sound that it snapped something inside of Lily.
"It's not possible," she insisted even as tears began welling in her eyes. "I just saw them last month! They were fine!"
"It was all very sudden," Mr. Potter said in a low voice. "I don't think they felt any pain."
"No, it's not right!" Lily cried. Hot tears were beginning to blur her vision now. "We're fighting a bloody wizard war, and my parents die in a car crash? It's not… They can't be. They can't!"
She trailed off as an ugly sob tore its way out of her body. Her left hand came up to cover her mouth, and her right took hold of Sirius' jacket as her knees suddenly threatened to give out. It hardly seemed real. Her parents were gone. She was an orphan.
The shock of it all was too much. Tears overflowed their eyelid barriers to spill down Lily's cheeks. Her legs collapsed, unable to bear her weight. Sirius managed to catch her, and he lowered them both carefully to the ground. James was kneeling beside them in an instant. He wrapped his arms around Lily, hugging her to his chest. Lily leaned into him as violent sobs began to wrack her frame. It took her a moment to realize that the wounded animal noises were coming from her own mouth. She felt like her entire world had just collapsed around her, and the weight of the debris was threatening to shatter what was left of her.
Sirius stayed beside them the whole time. Part of that was because Lily's right hand was still firmly latched onto his jacket. He finally managed to pry her fingers off the leather, but it was only so he could take her hand firmly in his own. Lily held on as if she would never let go. Even in her grief she seemed to know on some subconscious level that Sirius understood. His parents might not have died, but he knew what it was to suddenly have no family. The difference was that he had actually left his parents behind. Lily had loved hers dearly, and they had been cruelly ripped away. And that made it a hundred times worse. There wasn't even anything Sirius could do about it. There was no one to punch or hex or send a Howler to. He was completely helpless. All he could do was sit on the cold tile floor and hold Lily's hand as she sobbed into James' shirt.
And just like that, the illusion of their lovely, normal, perfect day shattered into a million pieces.
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Christmas was always a big deal at the Potter house. The entire place was decorated for the holiday. Holly berries, red ribbons, shiny tinsel, Christmas garlands, glass snowflakes, glittery stars, red poinsettias, frosted pinecones, decorative wreaths, and twinkling lights were put up everywhere. Mrs. Potter had all manner of fancy plates, ornate tablecloths, embroidered pillows, and spice-scented candles that came out as well. She also had a rather extensive snow globe collection that spread itself out across the house. A wide variety of snowman and Santa Clause figurines were placed on various windowsills and tabletops, and most of them were enchanted to dance or skate across their respective surfaces. One particular Santa Clause figure was Charmed to fly around the house on his small broom while laughing cheerily. Enchanted mistletoe was constantly popping up around the house, much to the amusement of James and Lily. It was, for lack of a better word, magical.
There was a small Christmas tree set up in the study, as well as one in each of the five bedrooms currently in use. (Remus had moved into the house last month to try and keep his condition from affecting the life his parents had finally begun to build. He and Lily had both tried to pay rent, but the Potters would have none of it, insisting that Remus and Lily were family. Which was a good thing, since neither of the teenagers had much money to their names.) But the largest of the trees was set up in the den. It was a coniferous giant that nearly touched the high ceiling. Decorating the tree was considered to be a family affair, which naturally meant that the three houseguests were also expected to help. They covered it in shiny colored balls, strings of popcorn (far more of which went into the boys' mouths than onto the strings), candy canes, paper chains, small golden bells, and a slew of beautiful ornaments that Mrs. Potter had collected over the years. A beautiful golden star was placed on the very top. James and his mother nearly had a row over whether the lights should be white or colored, but Mr. Potter settled it by Charming the bulbs to switch between the two every hour. Presents began to appear under the tree as well, wrapped in shiny paper and addressed to various names. James and Sirius naturally made a point of shaking all of theirs, but that got them no closer to determining what their presents might be.
Stockings were hung over the fireplace for each of the six human residents as well as one for Trina the house elf. She spent most of the Christmas season in the kitchen cooking with Mrs. Potter. They whipped up all sorts of cookies and cakes, so much so that Lily worried she would burst. The best was a mountain of gingerbread creatures which the four teens decorated and the Charmed to move around their festive dishes. Eggnog replaced the nightly glass of wine as the drink of choice. The whole house smelled constantly of nutmeg and spruce and freshly baked cookies. Christmas records played throughout the day, and they were often accompanied by enchanted figurines singing along.
And then there were the Christmas activities. Snow fell in the weeks before the holiday, leaving the four teenagers with an entire back lawn on which to sled and build snowmen and make snow angels and have snowball fights. Remus and Lily even Charmed part of it into a skating rink. Sirius, as it turned out, was quite graceful on skates. Remus was not. The boys were continuously making it snow indoors as well. They actually managed to turn one side of the grand staircase into a sledding ramp before Mrs. Potter made them clean it up. Mr. Potter asked Trina to knit everyone ugly Christmas sweaters that they were then forced to wear for a family photo, which naturally included the three house guests too. The magical picture was then framed and placed on the mantle. James took to wearing a set of plastic reindeer antlers with jingle bells on the ends that rang every time he walked. Sirius had a matching pair with lights instead of bells, and they made a game of trying to get their antlers onto Lily's head. Sirius managed it the most quite simply because the lack of bells made it easier for him to sneak up on her.
Peter and his mother came to visit on Christmas Eve, as did Remus' parents, the Longbottoms, and the McKinnon family. Mrs. Potter and Trina had made a delicious feast of a lunch that left everyone completely stuffed. Once they were able to move again, they all migrated into the snow-covered backyard to play Quidditch. Well, the four mothers actually drank tea instead of playing. But Marlene's three younger brothers made it an even fourteen, so things worked out just fine. The teams were divided with the five McKinnons and the two Longbottoms against the Marauders, Lily, Mr. Potter, and Mr. Lupin. It was a solid match with the score swinging first one way and then another. But victory finally went to the Marauders when Lily beat twelve-year-old Terrence McKinnon to the Snitch. It was really due more to luck than skill because Lily reached so far to make the grab that she flipped herself off her broom and into a pile of snow, much to the amusement of everyone else. Nevertheless, James spent the rest of the afternoon lamenting the fact that Lily had never tried out for the Gryffindor team.
When the sun set, everyone headed back inside. Dinner was a wonderfully delicious affair, and it was a miracle that anyone had room for desert. Presents were exchanged among friends afterwards, although any presents between family members were held off until Christmas morning when each family would have their own celebration. But there were still plenty of gifts to go round. Once everyone had unwrapped their newest possessions, there was another round of cookies and spiced wine, although the three McKinnon boys were given non-alcoholic eggnog instead since they were still technically underage. They huffed a little for show, but they didn't really seem to mind too much.
The party dissolved into separate groups at that point. The three fathers moved up to Mr. Potters study to smoke their pipes and look back on the highlights of their years. The mothers settled in the dining room to drink more wine and exchange their own news. The McKinnon boys convinced James and Sirius to give them a tour of the house, leaving Lily, Marlene, the two remaining Marauders, and the Longbottoms in the den to exchange a combination of light-hearted stories and Order business.
At some point in the conversation, Lily made an excuse and slipped out of the den. She loved those people dearly, and the day had been a truly amazing one. But it was also the first Christmas Eve Lily would be spending without her parents. They had only been gone for three and a half months, and the loss still ached most days.
She opened the front door into a white wonderland. It was incredibly peaceful outside, the silence broken only by the barely audible patter of snowflakes that were once more falling to land gently on the ground. Lily sat down on the front steps and looked out at the white world. The sky was clear overhead, allowing the moon and stars to shine down brightly on the clean world. The night air had a frosty edge, but Lily hardly minded. Her Christmas jumper would keep her warm enough for a little while. (It was James' favorite of her jumpers, a blue and white one with a giant snowflake on the front and two reindeer on either side of it that James always insisted were actually stags.) Besides, she needed a minute to clear her head away from all the Christmas cheer inside the house.
She wasn't sure how long she sat outside before the door opened behind her.
"There you are," Remus' voice said. Lily looked over her shoulder to see him vigorously rubbing his shoulders as the chill air hit his thin frame. "Merlin's beard, Lils! It's freezing out here."
"I'll be right in," Lily said, wiping away the moisture in her eyes before it crystallized on her lashes. "I just needed a minute."
Remus closed the front door and sat down beside her on the steps. He pulled his hands into the sleeves of his jumper and tucked them under his armpits before looking over at Lily.
"You okay?" he asked quietly.
"Yeah," Lily said, looking out at the snowy world. "It's just that it's my first Christmas Eve without my parents. I miss them is all."
"I'm sorry," Remus said sympathetically.
"It's okay," Lily said, trying to shrug it off. "Everyone was just so happy in there, and suddenly all I could think was how much they would've enjoyed it."
She sniffed hard and reached up to wipe her eyes again.
"I can only imagine how hard this is for you," Remus said quietly. "I know I only met them the one time last summer, but they seemed like good people."
"They were," Lily said. A hint of a smile tugged at her mouth. "We used to do this thing on Christmas Eve where we'd go outside when it started to get dark, and we'd watch for the first star to be visible. And whoever saw it got to make a wish for the next year." She pointed up at a particular star in the sky. "This year it was that one."
There was a slight tremor in her voice as she said it.
"So what'd you wish for?" Remus asked as Lily lowered her arm.
"If I tell you, it won't come true," she said, glancing over at him.
"Right," Remus said with a smile.
Lily looked back up at the sky and exhaled heavily through her nose as her smile faded.
"I know it may kinda feel like it right now," Remus said, "but you're not alone with this."
"I know," Lily said. She hugged her arms tighter to herself in an effort to stay warm. "Sirius already gave me his speech about how I've still got family here. He's pretty much adopted me as his sister now that we're both sort of orphaned. He says we have to stick together."
"Well, he's right," Remus told her. He motioned his head in the direction of the house. "The people in there may not be your blood, Lils, but they're still your family. And I know we can never replace what you lost. But we're still here for you no matter what." The corner of his mouth tugged upward as he added, "Even if it means sitting outside freezing our toes off."
"I know," Lily said. But her eyes were damp again as she looked back at him.
"Is there anything I can do?" Remus asked.
"I think you just did it," Lily said honestly.
She scooted over a bit so she could put her head on his shoulder. Remus leaned his own head against hers, and they lapsed into comfortable silence.
"Hey, Lils?" Remus said after a few minutes had passed.
"Yeah?" Lily answered.
"I legitimately can't feel my toes," Remus said.
There was a second or two of dead silence, and then Lily suddenly burst out laughing.
"It's not funny!" Remus cried as her shoulders began to shake with mirth. "I need my toes! Toes are very important for balance and walking!"
Lily lifted her head from his shoulder and looked over at him as she tried in vain to stifle her laughter. Remus threw up his hands in surrender.
"You know what? Fine," he said in mock irritation. "Laugh it up. Shows how much you care."
The front door swung open behind them, and they looked up to see James and Sirius both crammed in the doorway.
"There you are!" Sirius said. "We searched half the house for you two!"
"You better not be out here snogging my girlfriend, Lupin," James warned.
"That's exactly what I'm doing," Remus said drily. "You caught me."
"Blimey, it's cold out there," Sirius said. He shook himself as if to get warm, and there was something so canine about the gesture that Lily nearly lost it again.
"That's what I've been trying to tell her," Remus said in exasperation.
"Well, get in here," James said, taking a step back to make room. "The McKinnon boys are playing Exploding Snap upstairs, so we more mature folk are gonna have a Gobstones tournament. Marauders versus Frank and the girls."
"That sounds like a bad rock band," Lily said with a grin.
"Or a horrible Gobstones team," Sirius taunted.
"Bring it on, Black," Lily said gamely.
Remus stood to his feet and held out his hand to pull Lily up as well. Then he headed inside after Sirius, leaving Lily and James alone in the doorway.
"You okay?" James asked in concern.
"I am now," Lily said honestly.
Something shifted above their heads, and they both looked up to see a spring of mistletoe growing out of the doorframe.
"Tradition requires that I kiss you now," James said with a perfectly straight face.
"Well, if it's tradition, then I suppose it's alright," Lily said in her best nonchalant voice.
James tilted his head down and pressed his lips to hers in a tender kiss.
"Merry Christmas, Lily," he said when they finally pulled apart.
"Merry Christmas, James," Lily replied.
"Evans, get your butt in here!" Marlene called from the den. "Black and Pettigrew are talking trash, and me and the Longbottoms could use a hand destroying them!"
Lily and James both chuckled as they stepped fully into the house.
"May the best team win," James said politely.
"Oh, it will," Lily assured him.
James just laughed and pulled the front door closed behind him.
If you liked this chapter, please spare the time to leave a short review letting me know that. Reviews are life for writers. The chapter for the next year will go up on Sunday, and it's another one of my favorites. It involves James proposing to Lily, Remus being sentimental before the wedding, Peter starting to crack under the pressure, and Sirius being brotherly when Lily learns she's pregnant. So lots of fun stuff to look forward to. Be sure to come back in three days to see it all. Thanks for reading!
