Kens and I were in the park looking for the grey man and she shared a bit of her story with me. Ofcourse Hetty had already told me once on the case with Astrid that Kensi had lived on the street when she was younger, but Kensi didn't know this. So I acted surprised and she called me out on it. But she also said I could not fool her. I felt a little uncomfortable under her warning glance. Even from a distance she did something to me. But me being me asked her if she wanted to talk about it, since she was the one to start this topic, but ofcourse that did not last long and she did not want to talk about that period in her life. I just keep wishing I knew Kensi back then, but she assured me that I did not want that at all. It just saddened me to know she had to fight for herself from such a young age, but it also explains the walls she has put up around her heart.

Later, when we were at this little out-of-order kitchen we were thinking about a way in, but Kensi felt the need to explain to me why she never told me about her time on the street. I was actually a little curious, besides the fact that she did not want to be seen as week, but didn't deem it necesarry to talk about this in the middle of a rescue of two hostages while we're outgunned. But she said it anyway.

"You know I never told you about my time on the street, because I only ever want you to see the best of me..." She started.

"Really, you want to talk about this now?"

"I just need you to know Deeks. Got a plan ready?" She huffed.

"Yes actually..."

I knew she wanted to share, but now was definitely not the time. Thank god, we got mother and daughter safely out of there and we got rid of the criminals in one fell swoop. I was ready to talk with Kens about her childhood years now, but I didn't think she would want to talk after this case was over, so I started to pack up my stuff to go home.

She suprised me when she said "Uh, Deeks? Want to come over for pizza and top model?"

Even if she did not want to talk anymore tonight, I still got to hang out with my partner. It had become one of our traditions to have Top Model or movie night and take out a couple of times a week and I really enjoyed our quality time together. I got to learn little things about Kensi and occasionaly she would share a little more of her story with me. She told me she only ever wanted me to see the best of her, but to me Kensi is the best. She is the best partner I could ask for and my best friend. I could only hope that her comment meant something more, but I will be patient and not spring all of my feelings on her. We will get there, Kickass Kensalina and me. We watched Top Model and ate our pizza. It turned out she didn't want to talk about her chilhood years anymore, but we did talk besides judging the judging.

"Deeks?"

"Hmm?"

"I only ever want you to see the best of me, because I don't want you to start thinking about me differently than you do."

"Why would I look at you differently if you tell me about your time on the street?"

"Because I did a lot of bad things and we are both in a job to keep people from doing bad things. I was scared back than, and young. And I hate to admit it, but I felt incredibly vulnerable."

"You don't have to tell me anything you did Kens, I just know that whatever you did, it was to protect yourself or to keep yourself alive. You are not a criminal for what you did back than. I hope you don't see yourself as such."

"Maybe you're right, but that does not justify what I did. It feels wrong, still, and I don't want you to see me like a crook."

"I see you for who you are partner. Beautiful, intelligent, strong and extremely badass. Your secret is safe with me and I promise I won't look at you any differently."

"Thanks." She almost whispered.

We kept on watching Top Model and in the end we fell asleep on the couch tangled up together. I still hoped that one day she would share her story with me, but for now this was enough.