Djaq stood on deck, watching the waves crash against the side of the ship. It felt good to watch the waves and not feel sick. Her sickness had passed, finally, and she was beginning to enjoy the journey. It had been two weeks since her visit to the ship's physician, and she was still trying to come up with ways to tell Will that she was with child.
"It's going to be alright, you know," Marian said, coming to stand beside her.
"Hmm?" Djaq asked, looking up.
"You have that look on your face that says that you're worried. You think I haven't noticed."
Djaq smiled.
"I am just thinking."
"Dangerous, you know!"
Djaq laughed, not as much at Marian's poking fun at her, but at the mere fact that Marian seemed happy. Her cheeks held colour; her eyes sparkled; she smiled often.
"How are you feeling?" Marian asked.
Djaq made a face.
"I am no longer sick, if that is what you are asking."
Djaq, needing someone's advice, had told Marian that she was pregnant almost right away. Besides needing someone to confide in, she needed help with sewing clothes that would accommodate her growing bump. It hadn't begun to show very much yet, but Djaq knew it would, and soon. The baby was growing too quickly for her to hide it for long.
Marian, for her part, had been overjoyed at the news. But she seemed to have taken it upon herself to guard the younger woman and watch her constantly. Djaq wished she could show Marian that she wasn't made of glass, and not vulnerable just yet.
An idea came into Djaq's head. Cocking her head towards two broken broom handles that she had seen a cabin boy prop up against the rail earlier in the day, she raised her eyebrow at Marian.
"It has been a long time since you practiced your fencing. Do you fancy a match?"
Marian looked horrified.
"It's not good for the baby!" she exclaimed.
"The baby will be just fine. Exercise is good. Come now, afraid you will lose?" She tossed a stick to Marian, who caught it easily. If Djaq could beat Marian in a match, she might stop being so overprotective.
"You might be sorry," she said, but her hands began to inch over the staff, searching it for imperfections.
Djaq grinned. She and Marian had often sparred together when Marian was living in the woods with the outlaws. They were pretty evenly matched. As long as she was careful, Djaq couldn't see any problem with sparring.
"I am pregnant, you are out of practice; I think we are evenly matched." Djaq said.
Marian smiled. "I'm not that out of practice," she replied.
They circled each other carefully, searching for weaknesses. Djaq waited for her opportunity. She knew from experience that Marian was impatient, and would strike first. She did, lunging at Djaq.
Djaq parried easily, dancing out of Marian's way.
Swinging around, she made for Marian's leg to trip her up, but Marian was too fast for her. She intercepted, swinging her staff so that it forced Djaq's up with it.
Djaq stepped back, regaining her balance, and moving forward once again, their staffs moving with them as they danced across the deck, exchanging blows.
Djaq moved suddenly, and the sun caught her eye, causing her to blink and look away. Marian used her distraction to jab at her left arm. Djaq hissed at the sudden pain, but then stifled it as Marian swung around for another go. This time she was ready for her. Grabbing her staff with both hands, she used it to fend off Marian's next blow, the other woman's staff striking the middle of her outstretched one. Swinging her staff around so that it was once more held in one hand like a sword, Djaq lunged at Marian, catching the edge of her shin and making her stumble.
Marian recovered herself and darted behind the mast, using it as a shield. Djaq struck and missed, her staff bouncing off the mast. She recovered quickly, and followed around the mast. Marian evaded, keeping the mast in between them.
"Scared to face me, Marian?" Djaq taunted with a grin.
"You wish!" Marian replied, springing around the other side. Djaq turned just in time to catch her staff from smacking her shoulder.
With a quick move, Djaq skirted Marian's next blow and made one herself, carefully avoiding the area where Marian's wounds had so lately healed. It caught Marian on the left shoulder with a resounding crack, causing the Englishwoman to wince slightly.
They came around to face each other once again. Until now, Djaq had mainly been defending against Marian's attacks, saving her strength. Now, she went on the offensive, maneuvering her staff so that it was in position. She swung again and again, putting the force of all her weight behind each blow. Marian parried, but was forced to take a step back each time. Slowly, but with measured steps, Djaq was driving Marian towards the wall of the captain's cabin. Finally, Marian's back encountered the wall. She tried to move away from it, but Djaq pinned her against it, their staffs pressed right up against each other so that they were face to face.
"Pax!" Marian breathed, realizing she couldn't get out of this. She was panting heavily, the wisps of hair on her forehead damp with sweat. Djaq nodded, noting her trembling limbs and her own inability to catch her breath. Both raised their staffs in a gesture of agreement.
From all around there was a bust of applause. Djaq looked around, startled. Standing all around were crewmembers who had been watching their fight with interest. Most seemed impressed, and a few gave wolf whistles mixed with their applause. Djaq flushed, not realizing anyone had been watching, but Marian seemed pleased.
She laughed. "I had forgotten how out of practice I was!" she exclaimed, leaning against the railing of the ship and tilting her head back. "I'll need to shape up before I can go back to my top form as the Nightwatchman!"
"You are too hard on yourself," Djaq replied, coming to stand beside her. "You almost had me several times."
"But I didn't, did I? I guess fighting guards will bring it all back to me. And we need to practice some more. Well, I do," she amended. She rolled her shoulder and pulled a face.
"You don't hold anything back, do you?" she asked, rubbing the area.
Djaq grinned. "I thought you would appreciate having an actual work session. I saw how angry you got at Robin when he made it easy for you."
Marian gave an exaggerated sigh.
"Yes, well, that was Robin, wasn't it?"
Djaq shook her head, still smiling.
"Let me look at your shoulder," she said. "I think I have some balm that will help with the bruising."
"Can't sleep again?"
Djaq whirled around, spinning her staff in front of her defensively. It was the middle of the night, but for some reason she had so much energy that she didn't know what to do with it. Deciding that she was a little rusty in her fight with Marian several days before, Djaq had come up on deck to practice a few maneuvers by herself. She had been going through a complicated battle sequence when the voice had interrupted her. It was Thomas, the man she had met before on deck when she had been sick.
"Not sick any more, at least," she said, with a smile.
"That's a good thing," he said, smiling back. "I saw you spar against the other woman. You're pretty good. Where did you learn to fight like that?"
Djaq shrugged.
"Here and there."
Something about Thomas made her not want to reveal anything about her past, despite the fact that he was friendly and had been kind to her.
"Interesting style. You've sort of mixed English fighting techniques with a Saracen flair." Thomas took a step closer to her.
Djaq fought the urge to step back to keep the distance between them the same. Even though his manner was still friendly and teasing, there was something in it that she didn't like. It was almost predatory.
"I… learn fast," she said. "My brother was in Saladin's army. I watched him train." So far, no lies, she thought to herself.
"And the English part?"
"From Marian. We used to spar all the time, just to stay in practice." Again, Djaq wasn't lying. She just wasn't mentioning the two years spent as an outlaw in the forest fighting the Sheriff's guards.
"It's… interesting. By the way you're holding that staff, I can see that you know how to hold a sword. You wouldn't expect a women to know how to use one of those."
Frustration flared inside Djaq, but she kept it down. She got that response a lot. It was more to their detriment in the end that hers, because everyone underestimated her. She was small, and she was a woman, but she was also a good fighter.
Keeping calm, Djaq chose her words carefully.
"The women of my country learned long ago: those who cannot wield swords can still die on them."
"Fair enough," replied Thomas. He took another step forward, and leaned an elbow on the railing of the ship. "Tell me, Miss Scarlett, what will you do when you get to England?"
Djaq was startled by the change of pace in the conversation, but she took it in stride. Setting down her staff, she shrugged.
"Make sure Marian is safely to her husband of course," she replied.
"And then what? I guess what I'm really asking is: will you be coming back to the Holy Land again?"
Djaq smiled, looking out at the white-capped waves that disappeared into blackness where the lamplight ended.
"I don't think so," she said. "I don't belong in that world any more."
"Whose world do you belong in?" Thomas asked.
He was now so close that Djaq could feel his breath on her cheek. It was making her very uncomfortable, but she didn't want to move away. It felt as though he were challenging her, daring her to move away from him once again. She stood her ground.
"I like England. Except for the rain. And I almost got used to that."
"That's not what I meant." Thomas said in a low voice. The intimacy of the whisper made Djaq shiver involuntarily.
Before Djaq knew what was happening, Thomas was nose-to-nose with her. He looked into her eyes for a moment, and then smiled. And then his lips where on hers and he was kissing her.
Djaq was too shocked to react. Too stunned to do anything but stand there for a whole moment. Then, her mind kicked back in.
She pushed him away, her hand flying up to slap him as hard as she could.
"What do you think you are doing?" she demanded.
"Kissing you," Thomas answered, but the smile was starting to disappear.
"How dare you!" Djaq snapped. "How dare you think that you can push yourself on me."
"Push myself?" Thomas said, starting to sound angry. "You invited everything. You flirted with me."
"I did not!" Djaq snapped.
"What am I supposed to think when a pretty girl makes eyes at me, and insinuates she wants me to take care of her when she gets to England?"
"I do not need to be taken care of!" replied Djaq, exasperated. "When I get back to England I am going to live there. With my husband."
"He's not really your husband," Thomas shot back. "I know all those schemes, it's happened a couple of times. A girl needs a male escort to get somewhere, so she pays some man to pretend to be her husband. For safety. Only you picked a dim one, cos he's not very good at playacting."
Djaq was really angry now. Nobody insulted her Will and got away with it.
"Will Scarlett is my husband. He is the husband of my choosing, married in the Holy Land." She held up her hand on which the gold band gleamed in the lamplight.
Thomas looked at it in disgust. "Of course, all part of the ruse. Come on, you don't expect me to believe that an Englishman would marry a Saracen girl and then take her back to England, do you? Besides, Will Scarlett looks like he wouldn't dare hurt a hedgehog!"
"Just because he is quiet, does not mean he is not the most brave and valiant man I have ever known. He is also honourable, which is more than I can say for you. I am proud to carry his child!" The words slipped out of Djaq's mouth before she could stop them.
"You're lying. A fine, strong woman like you, actually being married to that shadow. You're not with child, you're just trying to put me off. Play hard to get. All girls do that." Thomas jutted out his chin arrogantly.
"I am doing no such thing. I am not the type of woman to make a man chase after her. I am leaving, and I do not wish you to speak to me again."
Djaq turned and began to walk towards the entrance to the cabins.
Behind her, she heard Thomas's voice.
"Djaq… wait."
But she continued walking, ignoring it.
When she got in the small room she and Will shared, Will was asleep, his back turned away from her. Djaq breathed a sigh of relief. She didn't feel like talking right now. Shrugging off her clothes in favour of a loose nightshirt, she climbed into her side of the bed and tried to forget about what just happened.
Djaq was in the cabin she shared with Will, tidying up. It was so small that there was hardly any room for a bed and a trunk, never mind their various things scattered around. Sunlight poured in from the porthole above the bed, which she had thrown wide open to let the light and air in, making the room seem bright and cheerful.
Will walked in and Djaq smiled at him.
"Where have you been all day?" she asked him. "I didn't see you at lunch. I missed you"
Will had been pensive all day, and unresponsive to her questions, which was unusual for him. Even then, standing before her, there was a pained expression on his face.
"It's no good, Djaq," he said softly, sitting on the edge of the bed with the air of a defeated man.
"What's no good?" she asked, putting down the garment she was folding and coming to sit beside him.
"This pretending," he replied.
Djaq was mystified. What in the world was he talking about?
"Pretending?" she asked, laying a hand on his arm.
He jerked his arm away, much to Djaq's surprise.
"Don't," he said sharply. "It's no good, Djaq. I saw you last night."
Understanding came over Djaq. Oh. He had heard her talk to Thomas. He had heard her say that she was pregnant.
"Did you hear all of it?" she asked, cautiously.
"As much as I wanted to hear," he replied.
Ah. So he did know about the baby. Worry filled Djaq. What if he didn't want children? What if he knew, as she did, that a baby would complicate living in the forest and being in Robin's gang, but unlike her, didn't want the baby because of it?
"And?" she asked. "What do you think?"
He turned away from her.
"What am I supposed to think, Djaq?" he asked.
Everything Djaq had been worrying about came crashing down on her. No, Allah, let it not be. Will didn't want the baby.
"You don't want it then?" Djaq choked, tears beginning to cloud her vision. "I thought you would be happy, Will."
"Happy?" he burst out. "How could I be happy?"
"I thought this would be what you wanted. It won't change anything with Robin's gang, I swear it."
"Robin? I don't even want to be anywhere near Robin, if that's where you're going to be. How could you, Djaq?"
The tears that were gathered in her eyes began to fall. A sense of horror and abject depression was gathering around her. Will didn't want the baby.
"It just happened. I didn't mean it to."
"That's what they always say, isn't it?" Will asked. He stood, and ran a hand through his hair. "Do you love him?"
"Of course I do!"
"I just… I just want you to be happy, Djaq," Will said quietly.
"I am happy with this. And I thought you would be, too."
"How could I be?" he said. Then, he seemed to gather himself. "When we get to England, after we take Marian to Robin, you can stay if you want. I'll go off and leave you two alone."
"How can you leave us?" Djaq demanded, the deep hurt she was feeling coming through in her voice. "How can you leave us all alone? We need you. I need you."
A dull ache was beginning to form around her heart. Will was going to leave her and the baby once they got to England. He didn't want the baby and he didn't want her.
"For what, Djaq?" he asked, turning towards her finally. "What do you need me for? You have him."
"I need you both," Djaq answered, brokenly. "How can he grow up without a father?"
"Father?" Will said sharply.
"Of course you are his father," Djaq replied. "Who else? I have never known any man but you."
"Djaq… are you… are you saying that you're pregnant?" Will asked.
Djaq looked up at him, startled.
"Is that not what we have been talking about?" she asked. "You heard me, last night, saying that I was pregnant, and now you have come to tell me you do not want the child. I had thought… I had thought you would want to be a father." Djaq stared down at her hands, letting the tears flow freely.
Will was silent for a long moment. Finally, he began to speak.
"No, I… I was talking about you kissing that sailor on the deck last night."
Djaq's head flew up.
"Thomas? You saw that?"
"Yeah. I woke up and you were gone, so I thought you might have been sick again. I went on deck to look for you, and I saw you kissing that sailor."
"Did you also see me slap him?" Djaq asked.
Will gave a weak smile.
"I didn't stay that long. I couldn't watch. I thought… I thought you loved him."
"Oh, Will," Djaq said. "How many times must I say it? I will love you and only you as long as I live. I thought you heard me tell him about the baby. I thought you didn't want it."
Will gathered Djaq up in his arms, repositioning her so that she sat on his lap. He held her tightly for a long moment, and when he pulled away there was a huge smile on his face.
"Am I really going to be a father?" he asked.
Djaq nodded.
"In about 5 months."
"This is the best news in the world!" he declared. "You aren't leaving me! And we're going to have a baby!"
Djaq buried her head in his chest and held on to him tightly.
"I was so worried you wouldn't want a baby right now. I was worried maybe it was the wrong time, especially now that we are going back to Robin."
"It isn't really the best time," Will conceded. "But that doesn't matter. It's happening now, too late to go back. And this child is a miracle. A gift from God."
"What about the gang?" Djaq asked.
"Well, as I see it, there are a couple of things we could do. First of all, you could go live with my brother Luke and my Auntie Annie until the baby is born. Then, when you're ready, you can come back to the camp with the baby. Or you can stay there. After all, you would be safe there, and so would the baby. But I know you would go crazy just sitting there keeping house. The other option is to stay in the forest the whole time, which will be dangerous and probably not very clean. What do you think?"
"We have lots of time to think about it," Djaq said. She was getting very comfortable in Will's lap, curled up against him.
Will held her securely in his arms, gently stroking her hair.
"We have our whole lives to figure it out," he said softly. "Us and the baby."
Author's Notes: Chocolategal16, this one is for you, because you asked for it ;-)
The reason this took so long was the fight sequence between Marian and Djaq took a LONG time to write. I'm not very good at action sequences where there isn't much dialogue, and I had to watch the Princess Bride fight between Inigo and the Dread Pirate Roberts again before I got the hang of it.
I just realized that there is no Rafi in this chapter. So next chapter he will be in there for sure. Next chapter should also be more cheerful, as they move every closer to Sherwood and Robin.
If anyone can spot the Lord of the Rings line, they get a cookie!
