It's been two months since I've come to the Cullen house. My stomach is still really small, thank goodness. I mean, it IS big, but it's still small. I asked Carlisle, and he told me every woman is differant in how big they get. I was lucky to be small, because I could still were clothes more normally than if I had a big stomach.

But I suppose sometimes it wasn't a good thing, because the baby was really small and unhealthy... or it was healthy, just not the standard healthy babies normally were.

Still, I had managed to keep the baby alive these 2 months, and that's all that mattered to me. All that mattered to Edward. I was on perminant bed rest now, except to shower and stuff.

During these two months I've lived at the Cullens very nice house. It's bigger than the one I was staying with Maddie in, but that one's more homey. It's now september and schools started. Maddie pulled a few more strings to let them now that I couldn't attend Harvard, and to let me start second semester. They weren't so liniant, but if I still want to go, they'll let me.

I still haven't fully decided.

Mostly because Edwards at Harvard now. He transfered the week after I got out of the hospital, so he wouldn't have to leave my side-except to go to school of course. How he got in was he was on good terms with the Dean. So he goes to school, then rushes back and is at my side all day.

I still don't get it. He's treating me like this now, which is a 360 turn from how I WAS treated by him. It's mind boggling.

And yet every morning I woke up he had breakfast ready, he would always come in at the same time for lunch, and for dinner, he'd make it himself and read to me and the baby while I ate. It was getting annoying. He always told me the same things when I complained about the fish-that it makes the baby smarter. Or that reading, while it won't help now, enhances a babys ability to learn. He was just getting the baby used to his voice now, so that when I gave the baby away, it would recognize him.

I didn't think that was possible. Only I didn't want to tell him that.

And I repeat, the WHOLE feeding me in bed, treat me like a princess thing, yeah, REALLY GETTING ON MY NERVES! I've tried to tell him, but he won't hear of it.

So, when Edward and his family go out on the hunting trips, the annual monthly ones, Maddies going to sneak me out of here.

But today is the day I meet with the people adopting my child. Or the child I'm giving birth to, not my child. Never my child.

I didn't tell Edward. I really don't want him there. Only he already knows, he's just respecting my wishes to not go. He knows because Alice told him.

So I'm making Alice take me as punishment.

Alice and Jasper have been going strong for the last few weeks, since he got out of the hospital, finally, 8 weeks ago. Now Jasper is constantly around Alice, only leaving her side when one of them takes a shower or other personal business. But they're always watching movies, or reading together, or talking. They enjoy each others presence.

I think they're so cute together it's not even funny! If anyone, they should be able to be together forever. I'm so glad Jasper made it. I don't even want to think what Alice would be like if he hadn't.

She probably wouldn't have made it either then. But I don't want to think about that.

Because Alice and Jasper are both here, both strong, both enjoying each other. Both occasionally barging into my room and kicking Edward out, Bless them, to make me watch movies with them.

Alice always sits on the left and Jasper on the right of me on the bed.

I've asked them why, and told them I could move to one side so they could sit together, but Alice told me that she and Jasper were making sure I didn't fall off the bed or something, and Jasper seconded it. If I even winced they'd whip their heads to look at me.

"I'm fine." I would assure them. They would look back at the TV, but I knew they were staring at me intetntly out of the peripheral vision. This kind of protectiveness was fine. I wasn't annoyed by them at all. In fact, I enjoyed having my two best friends in the whole wide world around. Especially since I had very nearly lost one of them, which, pyshically or mentally, would have killed the other.

But alas, the other four were also making sure I was protected. It was getting unbearable. I can't name one person who would like to be lazy and sit in bed all day, everday for two months or more who wouldn't go crazy. Now I knew how woman felt on bed rest, because I had become one of them.

And everyday I blamed it more and more on Edward and the night he attacked me. That WAS when it all started, all my troubles.

"Bella! Time to go meet the people." Alice came in bouncing.

"Thanks for taking me Alice."

She gave me a dark look and said nothing.

On the way to the adoption agency, where I was going to meet the parents who would raise this baby, it was silent. Alice wasn't even humming.

"Alice! Say something PLEASE!" I pleaded. I couldn't take the silence anymore.

"There's nothing to say." she said through gritted teeth. Her hands were gripping the steering wheel so hard they were turning white.

She did not like my desion. I got that.

I just sighed. I wouldn't get another word out of here.

"Alice, aren't you coming with me?" I half pleaded as she dropped me off at the drop off.

"Nope. Sorry Bella, this is all you." She shook her head, her face softening just a little.

"Alice, please, I can't do this alone." I was getting desperate.

"Then don't do it at all." And with that, she sped off, leaving me there.

I didn't even ask her how I was going to get home. Neither of us knew the ending time, and I didn't have her phone number.

I guess I was walking home. Not good for me, but oh well. I hoped I could make it.

For now, I took a deep breath to steady myself, and walked in. I was hit by the smell of freeshias and bold yellow walls with teddy bears painted on them. I saw children playing at one end of the dare care or something, I guess for the parents while they worked. On the other end, I saw cubicles. Lots of them.

"Ah Miss Swan." Lisa, the woman looking after my case, nodded at me. "The Travis's are here now. Just follow me."

I nervously followed her into a private room. This room was warm toned with windpendles and ladybugs painted all over the walls.

"Hello, Mark, Kate, this is Bella. She is the girl who with the child." Lisa told them.

They both stood up to shake my hands.

"Nice to meet you Bella." Mr. Travis smiled at me.

"Hello, Bella." Mrs. Travis' hand lingered on my hand, in a motherly grip.

"Well, I'll let you guys get aquainted with each other." Lisa said, and left in what looked like a hurry.

"Hello Mr. and Mrs. Travis." I said as best I could. I didn't like meeting new people a lot.

"Please, call us Mark and Kate." Kate smiled.

"Okay. Do you have any questions for me?" I said, sitting down. I still had trouble, even though I was lucky enough not to be that big.

"Yes. How old are you?" Mr- I mean, Mark asked.

"I'm 19." I nodded and smiled. Kates' smile got warmer.

"Oh, that's so young." she said in a motherly tone, again.

I nodded. "I know." I tried to smile, but it failed a little bit.

"So, I heard the father beat you, and that's why you're having problems with the pregnancy?" Mark asked, concern in his voice.

"Yes. He's treating me nicely now, but he just went crazy one day, about 4 1/2 months ago."

"Oh dear. How far are you along?"

"Seven months." Kates smiled widened.

"You've made it to the safe zone. That's wonderful. Now you just have to focus on the mile stones, make sure that baby is healthier." I know she said it kindly but it kind of made me mad to have her say it like that.

"Yes." I smiled.

"Would you want an open adoption or a closed adoption?" Mark asked me.

"Closed, pleased. I just want to give you the baby and be done with it."

Kate nodded, "Yes, of course dear. That's the best way."

"Do you have any questions for us, Bella?" Mark asked.

"Yes. Where do you guys live? So I can know where to not go."

"We live in Manchester."

I nodded. "That's good. I live in New Hampshire."

Kate looked at her watch. "Bella, it was so wonderful meeting you today, but we've RSVPed to a dinner party, and we must go to get ready. I'm really sorry. May we make an appoinment to see you again?" She asked, excitement lighting her up like a Christmas Tree.

"Sure, I'd be glad to see you again sometime soon." I smiled. I was sick of smiling, but I didn't want to come off as rude.

They stood up, and Kate came over and helped me up. "Thank you."

Kate smiled and they walked me to the door. Lisa came back in when she saw we were getting up. "Already? Well, should we set up a meeting?"

"Yes, we'd like to take Bella out for some ice cream or to the park or something." Mark said.

"That sounds good to me." I complied happily.

"Alright. How about this friday? We want to make the arrangments quick because Bella is so close to her due date and could deliver at any time."

We all agreed with enthusiasm. Over all, I liked Kate and Mark.

We all left together, and were out the doors, where we said our goodbyes and seperated. I was getting ready to walk home when Alice pulled up.

"Alice! You scared me!" I said, jumping.

"Relax Bella, you can't go jumping all the time now."

"How did you get here? I thought I'd have to walk home or something."

"Bella," She talked to me like she would a five year old who was having trouble learning something. "you are not, REPEAT NOT, even going to THINK about walking that far home. I know you didn't have my number and I don't have yours, so I waited here." She almost yelled at me smugly.

"Well... thanks Alice. It's so good to see you again. The people are really nice, wish you could have met them." I told her, happiness that this child would go to a good home seeping through me.

"Right... well get in. You shouldn't be standing this long, plus we have to get home to get you ready for the party we're hosting tonight." Alice glared. "Oh, and you have to have a date." She said smugly.

She was going to make me go with Edward I realized in horror.

"Who are you going with." I asked, even though everyone in the entire world knew the answer.

"I'm going with Jasper."

"Who's Emmett going with?" I asked. I was trying to prolong the moment until she sentenced me to go with Edward.

"Rosalie. And you're going with Edward!" She almost screamed the last part at me. Trying to get me to not try avoiding the question again.

"Great." I sat back in the chair, and watched Concord get closer and closer.