Once again, I do not own Harry Potter and I would like to thank Yoshishisha for the beta work.
Hope you enjoy the chapter :)
Remus woke up from a peaceful slumber. Brushing sleep out of his eyes he wondered for a fleeting moment as to why he wasn't in his pajamas, but instead in his trousers and shirt, when he took in his surroundings.
Right, he was in a tent, on a mission for the Order in Essex. With Tonks. With a start he looked at his watch, which he had unfastened beside his pillow and groaned in annoyance.
He had slept for about four hours and he had promised himself only two hours. But then, if only people could wake up by mere promises, the need to invent alarms wouldn't have arisen. He looked at his watch wistfully. It was his father's and it was so ancient it didn't even have an alarm function.
He remembered though, that when he had been a child, his mother had told him that if he wanted to wake up on time, he would just have to tell his pillow so, before sleeping.
And as a child he had developed this habit. Before going to sleep, he would request his pillow to wake him up on a particular time. But somewhere between becoming a werewolf and growing up, he had given up on this practice.
He shook his head as his mind filled with visions of his beautiful late mother. Not a day ever passed that he didn't remember her. She, just like her name, was a ray of hope in his life, which had extinguished years ago.
He shook out the final vestiges of sleep from his eyes as he washed up quickly. He reached the mouth of the tent and took a moment to observe the scene.
Tonks sat facing away from the tent, at the same place where he had been earlier: resting her chin on her raised knees, hugging them, to maybe save herself from the cold. Temperature had gone down various degrees.
Remus folded his arms across his chest, leaning a bit, taking advantage of his position where he went unnoticed by her. Half of her face was visible and every now and then, a lock of hair that had escaped her braid would flow in the direction of the breeze, barely grazing her cheeks. Flickering bluebells shadows danced on her face, making her look like an angel in dark. She looked like… like hope. Not Hope, as in his mother, but hope as in 'light at the end of the tunnel', as in a 'promised land'.
Oh, how he longed for her no one would ever know…
It had felt nice to fall back into companionship with her, had felt even nicer to see that she still cared, even if on a small level, that the full moon has just passed and he must not be feeling well. It was so easy to pretend that three years of separation didn't divide them…
In their case, he was like a voracious, starving man and she was like a feast, a glorious meal, but he wasn't even allowed to smell her, let alone taste her. He was only allowed to observe her from a distance, take pleasure from her laugh, her beauty, her kindness…
But that pleasure was always accompanied by a familiar pain, a familiar pang in his heart. Like just now- the more he watched, the more he wanted to move forward and touch her, feel her…
But those days were long gone.
He sighed and straightened himself up. She looked fairly cold and he would have brought her a blanket or a cup of hot drink, but now it was time for her to sleep.
So he approached her carefully so that he didn't startle her, clearing his throat subtly.
"You let me sleep for more time than I had initially intended to." He said in place of greeting.
She looked up, a small smile gracing her lips. "Like you said sleep deprivation makes you careless, I feel it makes you unhinged." She stood up smirking at him.
He shook his head in amusement. "Anything new?" He asked, tipping his head in direction of the barn.
"Well, looks like their dealer is due today, whatever it is that they are dealing in, I am not much excited in finding out. And it appears to me that they are mostly new recruits." She finished grimly.
"Yes, it would seem so. New ones headed by Avery and Macnair." It looked to him that it was more like a task given to the new Death Eaters to prove their true worth to the so called Dark Lord.
She yawned and he brought his attention back to her. "It's your turn now, D-Tonks." He didn't know if she did not notice his slip or if she noticed yet chose to ignore it.
"Good night!"
"Good night." He replied and watched her go. Few seconds later he could hear her exclaiming-
"Bloody hell, magic never ceases to amaze me…"
No, no you never cease to amaze me…
Remus was glad that Dumbledore had thought to send two people on this mission, or else he wouldn't have survived the boredom. Even if Tonks was currently sleeping inside the tent, she bore the promise of company once she woke up. The temptation to peep inside the tent, to watch her sleeping form was too much but he resisted, knowing that it will only increase his cravings for her further.
As the first rays of sun hit his face, he found himself wishing for a cup of tea. And when a cup of tea was presented beneath his nose, he was sure he was hallucinating due to tiredness.
"Will you take it, or are you trying to magic it through your eyes?" Came a cheeky voice from behind him and he double checked.
"I thought I was hallucinating." He replied taking it in his hands. It was pretty cold. "Here I was yearning for a warm cup of tea and suddenly it is in front of me in blink of an eye."
She seated next to him, holding herself a cup of coffee. He tried not to eye her cup accusingly. Their tea-coffee story had to be left in past.
"I remember how... Tea-crazed you get in morning." She answered him sipping her coffee.
He eyed her carefully. She looked both sleepy and fresh at the same time. Her hairs were now tied securely in a ponytail. It felt good to see that she remembered such little things about him.
But whenever he felt that she was just inches away from his grasp, he was reminded of something that showed him that she was no longer his. The cup of coffee in her hand told him so. Because once, she had shared his addiction of morning tea...
"Something new?" She asked, turning to look at him just in time as he turned away from her face. He didn't want to make her uncomfortable with all his staring.
"They are all a bunch of snoozers." He replied, taking a sip of his tea. "All I could hear was their snoring so I had to keep the extendables away."
She sniggered.
They sat there for few seconds and Remus found himself getting nostalgic. It had been so, so long, since they had witnessed a sunrise together. He remembered their countless sunrises, spent in countless manners; most spent sleeping, some spent in musings by him as he would watch shadows of sunrays through the curtain playing on her face, some spent in morning walk on her insistence, and some spent by simply lying in each other arms, slipping in and out of sleep.
He dared a glance over Tonks to see if it was affecting her, but she looked normal enough. He sighed internally, trying to ignore the dull ache. She would never know how many efforts it took to control him.
An image of one of the similar mornings came unbidden to his mind...
They sat on a small bench in the balcony she loved so much, watching the first rays of sun bathing the city. Her head rested on his shoulder, them both holding a cup of tea made by him. Times like these spent in quiet and peace with the love of his life, made him appreciate his life despite being a werewolf. He felt less like an animal in moments such as these.
"You are my Sun, Remus." Dora whispered as she picked up her legs and curled into him.
"You stole my line." He kissed her head which matched the pink in the sky.
He breathed her in along with the fresh air. What surprised him was that this time he was able to recognize the barest of change in her smell.
She had started to smell like him.
"Your tea is getting cold." Her voice broke his reverie.
He took a deep breath to calm himself.
She didn't smell like him anymore.
"Can I..." He started without thinking and then hesitated, wondering if it was the right thing to ask.
"What?" She peered at him through her fringe.
"Can I ask you something? You don't have to answer if you don't want to." He added hastily in the end. He hoped he wasn't digging up a hole for himself.
"Usually when people use that line on me, they ask something which offends me greatly." She started and looked as if she was contemplating something. Her head was facing him, tilted sideways and she looked downwards in thought. That was her posture of thinking. "But I trust you to be respectful enough."
He looked at her, surprised a little at the faith she put in him. Her expectations made him extra nervous.
"How- what- what have you been doing? Before the Order." He repeated the questions ten times in his head wondering if he had framed it right.
She barely reacted but had that contemplative look again.
What he wanted to know was what and how she did after he left back then. But he knew that even if he were to ask her directly, she would never ever answer that question. But he would gladly accept any answer she would give.
"Well, you know, I have been an Auror for a year." She said and it didn't escape his notice how she completely skipped her training part. "I joined the day Mad-eye retired and he joked, joked that in the coming sixty years I would be the new Mad-eye of the Auror department." She smiled at the memory.
"It's pretty symbolic." He commented quietly and her eyes flicked to his. "You joining the department on the same day he left. He adores you."
"Yeah..." Her eyes softened. "He... He did things for me, Remus that no ordinary mentor would have done. He was assigned my incharge, my boss in a way for those three years but he made himself my mentor, in real terms. He had been guiding me for years and I owe him a lot. What I am today and I am not talking about just being an Auror, but the way I am, the human being I am today, a lot of credit goes to him." She spoke so passionately about him that he felt as if she wasn't telling him something, as if there was more to the story.
"I have seen him with his real eye and his nose intact. When I first saw him it gave me a real scare and I refused to believe when they told me that he was Alastor Moody."
She chuckled. "Anyways, I mostly did small cases in the beginning; they assigned me to big events security and as such. But slowly I was made part of few bigger projects. And yes, I made a friend; a very dear friend during my Auror training. Her name is Amy, the only female Auror beside me."
"Really?" He was genuinely surprised to know that she had made a real friend, as she always had difficulty connecting with people. "And by the way I noticed that Hestia and Ginny too have become your friend."
She let out a puff of air from her mouth, cupping back of her neck and letting it fall on her raised knee. "The Order has given me so much in just a month. I feel I truly do belong here even if I fit nowhere else."
"Yes... A bunch of odd people we are."
He looked over to her and gave her a quick smile. Whenever she was near him, he found it impossible to stare into her eyes for longer period. May be it was because of his guilty conscience or maybe because he feared that if he stared down those eyes, if he read all the pain and stories hidden in those eyes, he'd never be able to look away again...
They talked for a while and it was delightful to be comfortable around her. But sure it would have felt nicer if only her head would have been on his shoulder or if he could have kissed her...
He decided to ignore the thoughts but not banish them entirely because he knew it was futile. Instead he concentrated on talking to her so that maybe, just maybe the void three years had created in his heart would lessen a bit.
She never did asked what he did in those three years. And he was glad she didn't.
The whole afternoon passed quietly under a Sun shield charm. There was no activity within the barn but whenever a Death Eater would come out for a stroll or for a lookout they would watch with their bated breaths. Not because they were scared but because if only someone would decide to walk in the direction of their circle, they would be stopped by an invisible magical wall and that would be a dead giveaway that there was someone watching them. But the Death Eaters were so lazy and over confident that they wouldn't even move more than four step forward. Tonks was beginning to doubt that it was only a barn from outside; inside it must be pretty cozy. Remus couldn't disagree. Even in the last war, the Death Eaters had safe houses all over the country packed with all necessities and things of comfort.
Therefore to pass the time, all they did was to talk and eat the food Molly had sent. Tonks even said to him that she would have enjoyed this mission more only if their movement wasn't limited by the circle.
It started getting dark earlier than it would have got in London. And they anticipated that whatever would happen would have to happen today itself.
Finally when they had had their evening snacks (seeing as they had nothing too exciting to do, they had taken it upon themselves to finish everything Molly had sent them- and it was pretty much. Why waste food after all?), they heard apparition cracks far away.
Tonks immediately stood. "Judging by the sound of their apparition, they are two in number-"
"-and they could be coming from any direction as they probably don't know the exact location of the barn." He stood up too, wand in hand.
"Yes, I'll be this side and you take that side, so if need be we could divert them from our path."
"Right."He took the side facing the barn while she took the one opposite to the barn.
He waited for them to arrive, his eyes and posture alert. Finally he saw them and they were approaching from Tonks's side. She had noticed them too and her wand was raised, to confound them the moment they came too near to their magical sphere.
One of them was dressed in a brown cloak, wearing an eye patch, bald head and with an aura of arrogance around him. The man next to him looked younger and thinner; but what was obviously noticeable was that he was carrying a very huge wooden box with the help of magic. Whatever they were dealing in, it had to be in this box.
And they had apparently decided that going through the circle (which they couldn't see) was the best path to reach their destination. He approached Tonks, wanting to tell her to perform the cunfundus charm immediately and not to wait more as there wasn't a place to take risk. Finally when they were just two steps away from her and the sphere Tonks whispered two 'confundo'.
A puzzled and hazy look covered the faces of those men but the cunfundus charm apparently interfered with the thin man's levitation charm which resulted in him dropping the box.
Tonks gasped and Remus's breath hitched in his throat as, in slow motion, the box toppled down from its position. The cunfundus charm had worked yes, but if the box were to collide with the sphere it would bounce back and would give them away anyway; after all cunfundus was for humans not for inanimate objects.
But they were as lucky as if they had had Felix Felicis. As Remus neared Tonks, he saw the box had fallen inches beyond their boundary. A cold sweat had broken on her forehead. Also, they were just so near to them, just at an arm's length...
"Can't you bloody do one thing correctly, you little piece of shit." The eye-patched man spat at his 'subordinate' as he slowly turned red with anger. "Do you know how fucking important that is? Are you intending for us to get killed. Pick it up!"
"Ye-yes boss. S-Sorry boss." The thinner man looked fearful and his hands shook as he performed the levitation charm and Remus once again feared he would drop the box. But they carried out without any further incident.
"Are you okay?" Remus asked Tonks after they had disappeared from the view.
She looked pretty shaken. "Apart from the mini heart attack I had when he dropped that damned box, I am fine. It was foolish of me to wait to see where they were going up until the last moment."
"No, it's alright. It worked out fine and that's what matters. Come on let's see what all this fuss is exactly about."
They took their position again, him with the binoculars and she with the extendable ears, trying to figure out as much as they could.
After a few minutes however, Tonks grew frustrated.
"They won't even say what it is. All they are discussing is the prices and if they had been seen. What is it? Explosives, muggle weapons or what?!"
Remus removed his binoculars and replied grimly:
"Neither. It's some... Living being."
"What?"
"I just saw the box rattling."
"Shit. That's-"
"-unexpected, yeah."
"Do you think whatever they have in there- is- is human?" She hesitated.
"I doubt it. It's probably something which couldn't be controlled by a simple stupefy or petrifying spell."
"Or something which they need alive."
"I have a feeling." He turned to look at her. "It's some dangerous being or beast or dark creature."
Her eyebrows rose in amazement. "As in kappa or something?"
"Something much more dangerous-"
"-and sinister." She finished. "Why would they need it but?"
"New ways to torture? Or to threaten people with?"
She sighed in weariness. "As much as magic and magical world is fascinating, it's equally dangerous. The meaning and the scope of what they have right now, is vast and unknown. It is necessary for us to figure it out. And the reason that man there got so angry when the box fell was because he was afraid to expose the items of the box and I thought he was talking about Death Eaters killing him."
He sighed. "I'll get back to watching; maybe they will open the box to check its contents?"
"Alright." She dropped her extendable. "I am going to have some water; all this madness has made me thirsty."
"The water bottle is beside the tent." He told her, going back to his spying.
"Okay!" Came her voice from behind.
Later, when he would look back to this moment, he would forever regret telling her where the water bottle had been.
The blood curdling scream he heard, froze the blood in his veins. He had never ever heard a sound that had terrified him so much.
Heart thudding violently in his chest, he threw his binoculars away turning to look at her, wand at the ready.
What he saw made him nauseous. It was as if time had stopped and everything was reeling in slow motion. He saw Tonks stumbling to the ground, her face crumbled in sheer agony and a serpentine creature of black and orange, boring its fang in her arm.
He had taken few steps forward already but he didn't wait to come near her completely and fired his spell right away from the distance. He had never been a proud person, but he knew, later in time he would forever be grateful for his ability to aim directly at moving objects.
He pointed his wand directly at the right head of the Runespoor and shouted: "REDUCTO!"
The creature blasted into tiny pieces and Remus didn't care if anyone had seen the little pieces of orange and black flying in the air. All his mind and heart knew and screamed was Dora Dora Dora...
The four steps he ran to her felt to him as the longest race of his life.
He caught her in his arms just before she hit the ground.
"No, no, no, no..." He didn't know what words were coming out from his mouth. All he could see was that her face was devoid of all the color, her mouth foaming and tiny drops of blood seeping out of her nostrils. "No, Dora please no..."
His hands shook as he continuously and rigorously patted her cheek. "Wake up, wake up..." sheer desperation seeped into his voice; her every moan and whimper threatened to eat him.
He looked around madly as if expecting a hospital to pop out magically or expecting to find Madam Pomfrey running to them. There was no one to help; they were right in the middle of a jungle. Merlin he had been such a fool; the sphere obviously warded off only humans, why hadn't he thought to ward it off against animals too?
At that time his brain was divided into two parts- one part of his brain was shrinking in sheer panic telling him that Runespoor bite was deadly, that all was over now while another part screamed him to do something quickly before it was too late. Before she died...
"NO!" He screamed unable to bear the thought, unable to see her twitching in pain.
Thinking quickly he aimed his wand at her arm. Never in his life had his wand shook so violently. He saw a hole where that creature had bit her and immediately white strips of cloth flew out of his wand, tying themselves tightly on her arm a little above the wound. This would prevent the poison from spreading to rest of the body momentarily. Basic first aid yes, he had learned that.
He then concentrated on her face. She was sliding in and out of consciousness, and the foam out of her mouth and blood out of her nostrils scared him out of his wits. He gently placed her head his in lap, and wiped her face with his sleeve.
Her eyes were sliding close and open, and he knew she wasn't seeing anything. He cupped her face and bent down.
"Dora, please love, please don't sleep, please don't black out, I know you want to sleep but please fight it love, please..." He begged her as a tear finally dropped from his eye and fell on her forehead. If she fell asleep now, she would never wake up.
What to do, what to do... Help me god, help me somebody, anybody, please save her, please let her live...
"Dora!" He shook her head violently when she didn't respond to his words. "You can't sleep, did you hear me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND?"
Her only answer was a hiccup and a moan as fluids further flowed from her.
"Look at me, look at me." He pleaded and bent down further. Only, if only she would hear a part of his voice…
Then a miracle happened, her unseeing eyes came into focus and flickered to his eyes which he knew by know were swimming with tears. The light behind her eyes was dim but it was there nevertheless.
"Dora, Precious please stay with me... I need you to be strong, while I help you... Precious, my little fighter, you can do it, fight for your life, fight for me sweetheart please..." he spoke to her mindlessly, while the working part of his brain thought of some plan of action. She gave him a barely perceptible blink, indicating that somewhere deep down, she could hear him, that she was fighting...
Don't forget the medical kit...
Bill Weasley's statement resounded in his ears and he felt as if a ray of hope had been lit up in his heart. Thinking about his mother, asking her silently to help his son from where ever she was, he raised his wand.
"Accio medical kit, Accio ACCIO!" He shouted in despair when it didn't come out after a second. Finally when it came, he thought he had never been happier to see a medical kit.
When his shaking hands couldn't do the simple task of even opening the lid, he used his wand, and frantically searched for what he was looking for.
When they had been cleaning Grimmauld Place, they had found out an extensive and expensive stash of potion kits and ingredients. Alastor had it checked by Snape, and they had thrown out all the expired material, keeping in the rest to use in necessity. When Remus had been packing the kit, his hands had unwittingly picked up a bezoar stone, as if they had known that he'd need it today.
"Open your mouth love..." He whispered gently to her, caressing her hairs with one hand and trying to tip her mouth open with the other. Stuffing this big stone in the mouth of someone who was barely conscious, looked cruel, but it was a necessity.
When the stone lodged in between her throat and she started choking, he couldn't help as a strangled plea escaped his mouth. He encircled her shoulder and picked her up a little to aid her in swallowing the stone. Somehow, after few moments, the stone successfully slid down her throat.
He further picked her up, supporting her upper body and crushing her to his chest sideways, her head on his shoulder, rubbing her back, trying to stop her writhing and willing the stone to do his work.
"It'll be okay, it's going to be okay... Precious it's going to be okay..." He kissed her head and sniffed, telling himself to keep his calm and cool. It wouldn't help her if he lost control now.
He felt her taking shallow breaths against his neck. Alarmed, he drew a little away to look at her.
Thankfully the bleeding had stopped from her nose but she now looked green. Sensing, he supported her and immediately she threw up on the ground, retching violently.
He drew a little breath of relief in when she didn't vomit the stone and he hoped the stone was working its magic on the poison.
When she was done, he slumped her against his body and vanished the mess with a flick of his wand. Conjuring a handkerchief, he tenderly wiped her face.
"How are you feeling?" He had never heard his own voice sounding so petrified and weak.
Apparently she wasn't well enough to answer yet as she gave a moan so low, he wouldn't have heard it had his ear not been close to her face.
He kissed the top of her head to ensure himself that she was indeed out of danger now, forgetting for few moments that he wasn't supposed to touch her like that anymore.
Taking a deep breath, he reached for the kit again, taking out a tiny bottle of blue liquid. Opening it, he tenderly picked up her arm dropping exactly three drops on the wound.
She cried out in pain and he winced, causing him to hold her more securely in reflex as if to protect her from the pain.
"I'm sorry... It'll help you Dora I promise."
She buried her face in his shoulders and he felt his shirt getting wetter with her tears. He knew she was at her weakest and felt most vulnerable or else she wouldn't have shown such weakness in front of him of all people.
He started in disgust and horror, as charcoal black liquid poured out of her wound and felt her skin getting warmer as the poison finally left her body.
Thank god… thank you god…
When the liquid stopped oozing out, he gently wiped her arm and applied Dittany to close it, hoping that his medical attentions and steps wouldn't degrade her health further. Truth was he wanted to take her to an experienced healer; but obviously he couldn't directly apparate to Madam Pomfrey and carrying her all the way from Hogwarts gate to the infirmary would have taken time he wasn't sure she had. Similarly, he couldn't apparate directly inside St Mungo's either. He would have apparated her to the headquarters but he knew there was no meeting today; neither Snape nor Hestia would have been there. Him being a DADA teacher, he had some experience though.
"How are you feeling?" He tried again, almost dying inside to hear a single word from her or anything other than those moans and whimpers of pain.
She just shook her head once and he felt her body loosening as if she had no energy left. She went completely limp and he would have thought she had blacked out if he couldn't feel her whimpering.
He caressed her back, cupping her head with his hand and supporting it on his shoulder. "I am here. You are safe. I wouldn't let anything harm you... I am sorry." He kept mumbling mindlessly to assure her of his presence as well as to avoid the otherwise ringing silence.
After ages she croaked out weakly in his shirt: "W...ter..."
Water…
He conjured up the required item so fast that even he was dimly amazed of his speed. But even drinking water didn't seem such an easy task as she coughed and spluttered some out and winced while swallowing. Finally, when water flowed through her throat easily she closed her eyes at little contentment.
He dried her clothes wherever the water had fallen and wiped her face again.
Palming her cheek and supporting her back with his other arm, he brought her face closer to him. "Can you hear me Dora?"
Please say something…
She slowly opened her eyes and just looked at him.
"Dora?"
"T..i..red."
Tired, she was tired. After the Runespoor bite was cured, the victim grew abnormally tired and sometimes delirious too.
Laying her head back on his shoulder, he hugged her to him and kissed her forehead. "I understand precious. But you are going to be fine."
"Tired... M tired." She repeated again but this time she spoke clearly though still very weakly.
"Sleep Dora. You are safe now, you can sleep. When you'll wake up, you'll be fine."
Her fingers that lay on ground, twitched. He tenderly cradled them in his hand and brought them to his lips. "What love?"
"Last time... I asleep... You... Left me..." Though she had spoken very quietly he felt as if someone had shouted those horrible words in his ears. He squeezed his eyes shut and placed his forehead on crown of her head. He took in a shuddering breath.
He swallowed numerous times to croak past the lump in his throat. "I won't this time... I won't... I am sorry Precious, so sorry..."
"Precious..." She repeated as if in a daze.
"Yes, precious, my Precious..." he whispered in her ear.
After few moments of silence she spoke up suddenly:
"Blue curtains are better..." She mumbled and he realized that she was getting feverish and was probably hallucinating. But the blue curtains she was talking about were a reality of their past. When she had been moving in her new flat, he had argued that pink curtains would complement her better while she had gone with the blue because it had been his favorite color. But what she had never known was that she had been the color in his life.
"Yes, yes blue curtains are better..."
"Allison has invited us..."
"Yes next week I know Dora, don't you worry, just sleep. Trust me and sleep you'll feel better." Allison was her muggle cousin and one of the rare people who had known about their relationship.
"Hmm..."
For moments when she didn't said anything neither about her pain nor about past memories, he thought she had finally fallen asleep. Then suddenly she gripped his hand tightly.
"What-" He ducked his head to look at her face and she stared at him with a completely unguarded and vulnerable expression.
"Remus..." Her words didn't bear complete clarity, yet he could understand what she was saying. "Do- do you still love me?"
Her saying still meant that she was back in her present, yet he knew she wasn't completely aware of what she was asking. Because the Tonks he knew now, would never have asked that question.
He caressed her cheekbone and sadly contemplated his options. She had almost died and a probability was that she wouldn't even remember his answer when she woke up. But then there was also a chance that she would remember. Uncaring of what would happen the next day, he spoke:
"Of course I do." He gave her a sad chuckle. "How can I not? I love you Dora, I always have…" He sighed and clutched her closer. "Seeing you falling moments ago, almost killed me. And it has killed me; every second I have spent in those three years apart from you killed me. I am going to make this right." He said it all, all the while looking in to her eyes and true to his expectations, he wasn't able to look away from them.
"You talk too much..." She whispered and pouted. He gave a weak smile and placed his forehead on hers.
"That I do..."
She wriggled her fingers again as if wanting to touch him. He guided her palm to his cheek.
"You are my Sun." Her words froze him. He didn't know if she was in present or had drifted to her past again. But he hoped oh how desperately he hoped that she had meant for present.
"You stole my line." He said simply. "Sleep."
This time when she closed her eyes, she fell asleep in seconds.
He knew what he had to do when she woke up. He was going to tell her he loved her, again. He was going to explain her, he would make her understand his reasons of leaving, and he was going to beg her for forgiveness. He was going to plead to her to give him another chance. He wanted to be back in her life and he wanted her back in his and not just as friends, but as more than that.
He was going to make this right.
He guided her face so that he could look at her. He stared at her for a long time, realizing how close he had come to losing her.
He stroked her cheek with his thumb and bent down to place a sweet, lingering kiss on her lips. Even if she was asleep, even if she obviously didn't kiss him back, he felt alive in ways like he hadn't in years.
Yes, he was going to make everything right.
As soon as they entered the living room, he turned her around and embraced her. He kissed her as if he hadn't seen her in ages. His hands roamed all over her body though still skipping the places she really wanted him to touch. He was such a gentleman. She shrugged off her coat and it fell to the ground at their feet. She felt the texture of his hairs with her hands and pulled his mouth closer to deepen the kiss.
But of course, her being her, she pulled him a little too forcefully, causing her to stumble and taking him along with her. Thankfully they landed on the new soft cushiony sofa next to them.
"Clumsy, clumsy. You trip so strategically my dear." He teased and his hot breath grazed her jaw as he proceeded with kissing her neck softly.
"Mmm... Be thankful to my clumsy nature Lupin that you are currently on top of me, or else you wouldn't be that lucky..." She teased him back.
He surfaced for air and pinched her nose. "Cheeky little bird... God look at you..."
He looked at her in such awe as if he had found a diamond amidst a coal mine.
"Look at me what? I need a mirror for that."
"Oh you don't… trust me, I'll tell you that..." He shifted so that they lay comfortably though he still had half of his weight on her, yet it wasn't suffocating. "Your red lipstick is all smudged-"
"I must look like a right monkey if my lipstick is all smudged." She raised her eyebrows. Normally she would have been mortified that her makeup had been ruined but in front of Remus, somehow it never really mattered.
"-if only you'd let me finish. And yes, smudged lipstick on any other woman might make her look like a monkey but in your case- I mean the knowledge that I have smudged that lipstick makes you all the more kissable and makes it almost impossible to not to kiss you." As soon as he finished speaking he bent to join their lips again.
"That's why I wear edible lipstick whenever I do." She mumbled into his lips.
"Oh so that's for my benefit." He pulled away and trailed his thumb on her lower lip. She didn't know if he was smudging it further or correcting it. "And by the way, you looked ravishing today..."
They had been invited by her muggle cousin Allison and her husband to dinner. And since she was a muggle Remus had felt more comfortable around them as they didn't need to know about his status as a werewolf.
"You already told me that." She said fingering his top button. She wore a red shirt kind of top which had only three buttons and was like a normal top rest way and black pencil skirt. Normal clothes for muggles.
He mirrored her actions and started fiddling with her own button. He looked carefully at the button and then at her. His eyes held a hesitant yet eager question. But he chose to bend and kiss her lips, trailing his lips slowly on her jaw towards her neck.
As she pulled out his shirt from his trousers to feel his skin, she felt his hand gently pulling out her own top and creeping inside to touch her inside.
She gasped in his mouth both with surprise and pleasure. This was the farthest he had gone so far. And it was funny sometimes that in some aspects of their relationships they had gone so fast while in some they were super slow.
Thinking that he was following her lead, she popped open his first button.
And true to her expectations he did the same.
She chuckled. "Very smooth Remus, very smooth. Say so if you..." She trailed off, not knowing what she was asking for. She felt the weight of her own thoughts settle on her heart and she could feel herself blush.
"I- just... I mean are you really ready?"
She looked up from his button to his eyes and back to his button again. His hand on her waist that was warming her was very distracting and now to add to her further distraction she could see some skin of his chest.
"All my life I have known that I'll do this someday but... As things were going I never really expected to do this with somebody I love, somebody who would accept me the way I am without expecting me to change physically or personality wise. So... In short, yes I am ready..." She barely whispered the few last words, not daring to look in his eyes, her heart thudding in her chest.
He shifted his weight on his elbow and pulled her chin up.
"Yes, I want you. I want you just the way you are." He held so much love in his soulful eyes that she felt a lump forming in her throat. She leaned up, opening her mouth a little, inviting him to kiss her.
This time when he kissed, he didn't wait for her to lead. He popped open the rest two buttons and slid his hand inside through the space he had created. Feeling his warm and a bit roughened hand on her skin made goose bumps rise on her body.
He took her hands and guided them to his own shirt button.
When she finally shrugged his shirt out of his shoulders, he paused, letting it fall completely.
"I am sorry about the scars... I understand they aren't much of a turn on..." he tried to speak casually, but she knew it mattered to him, but she also knew that he knew that such trivial things as physicality of a person didn't bothered her, being what she herself was...
And anyways, she was far more excited to see him shirtless. Her hands shook as she touched and traced his scars lightly. "What are you saying? They do it just fine for me." She said breathlessly.
He smiled and caught her lips in a scorching kiss, while his hands slowly drifted downwards to her waist, gathering her shirt from both the sides in a bunch and pulling it above her head.
She had never felt so vulnerable and safe all at once. Her instant thought was to cover up but then she reminded herself that she wanted this, actually wanted this. She felt as if her heart had lodged in her throat and felt inexplicably shy and excited at the same time as he gazed at her with sheer adoration in his eyes.
"I knew you were beautiful." He slowly lowered himself and they both sighed at skin to skin touch.
"I'd rather do this...in...bedroom." She somehow said.
"You are right."
He carried her to her bed and lowered her gently on the mattress. Settling on top of her, his hands crept to her back, to free her of the tiny confine.
She closed her eyes and a sigh escaped her lips as he lowered his mouth to the newly exposed skin...
Tonks woke up with a start, gulping all the air she could manage at once.
What the hell had that dream meant? No that hadn't been a dream, that had been a memory…
"Nymphadora?" She turned to look at the worried face of Remus Lupin.
Now that she paid attention, she remembered all at once. The Runespoor, the bite, the unbearable pain...
She was in the tent, in the lower bunk with Remus next to her. She slowly acknowledged the dull ache in her whole body and a sharp pain in her right arm.
"What happened?" She tried to sit up, and cried out in pain as pressure bore on her arm.
"Careful." He warned and helped her in sitting up propping the pillows behind her.
"The watch!" She suddenly remembered. If she was here and Remus was here who was out watching? And it was crucial as they had to know what the weapon was they were trading in. But then suddenly realization dawned upon her face.
"Runespoor..." She groaned out and looked at Remus.
"Yes..." He answered grimly. "Apparently those were the weapon. I assume that when the box fell one of them escaped, unnoticed by either of us."
"You mean to say there are more?" She asked in surprise.
"The box was too big for just one. Besides if there were few, they would have noticed the missing one."
"Which also means that they are in such a number that if one or two went missing, they probably wouldn't notice." She shook her head. The place where it had bit her had gone dark purple.
"Runespoor were known as pet for dark wizards. They did their bidding and it's no surprise that they would use them. The right head has the most venomous fangs-"
"-and the left one is the thinker and the middle head is the dreamer. Yeah I remember from my NEWTS."
"You gave me a right scare." He said softly and now that she noticed, he looked paler than usual. He brushed her hairs away from her cheek.
"I am sorry Remus, I got myself bit and-"
"Listen Tonks. You did not ask for this okay? And I know what you are going to say, but we already know what the weapon is and after you fell asleep, I went back to watch. I saw the dealers leaving and later the Death Eaters left too. I don't know if they will be coming back but we are apparating back first thing in the morning."
"But our Orders are to stay until tomorrow midnight-" Great, now she will be the cause of aborting a mission.
"I don't care. Besides, our Orders are also to be safe, and I think you need immediate medical attention."
"Do-do you think I am in danger?" She asked meekly, fearing the answer. She knew about Runespoor but not enough about their bites.
His eyes softened. "I believe I took out all the poison; but some side effects might remain which only an experienced healer would be able to tell."
"I just... Just remember so much pain..."
"I know..." he stared at her with traumatized eyes as if he had gone through ages of pain and she looked away, the sheer intensity of his eyes scared her. "Nymphadora, I-"
"How-how did you treated me?" she looked up just in time to see him furrowing his brows in confusion.
"You mean you don't remember?"
"I was too much in pain to pay attention to anything..."
"Well yes, a bezoar stone, the poison extracting potion and the Dittany."
"Merlin Remus, thanks to your brilliance that you thought to pack these things. Or else I don't know what would have happened."
"I don't know either and frankly I don't want to imagine." He said grimly, his eyes downtrodden. He then looked up staring again with that look. "Do you remember nothing? I mean once the pain subsided? Because after I applied the potion on your wound, your pain seemed to lessen." He was saying in a manner as if it was really important for him to know.
She searched her brains and answered him:
"No...no I don't remember. Should I? Did something happen?"
For a moment she thought he looked shocked, but he covered up that expression so fast she thought she must have imagined it. He rubbed his palms on his lips, thinking and then swallowed to say:
"No, no. Of course you shouldn't. I am glad you don't remember anyway. There's no benefit in remembering pain." His voice sounded constricted, as if he was choking.
"Remus, are you okay?"
"Yes." He abruptly got up from her mattress. "Here, don't forget to take this potion. And try to sleep. I'll just have a look around outside and pack for the morning. Goodnight." And then he turned away, stumbling out of the tent, leaving her behind in confusion with the potion bottle.
She shrugged and swallowed the potion and letting it work upon her body without resisting it. Her eyes started dropping as soon as she put her head on the pillow. She succumbed to sleep knowing she was safe, even amidst a jungle, even after being bitten by a Runespoor, even in a Death Eater site, with Remus guarding her.
A/N: There you have the eight chapter. I really felt bad for Remus in this chapter and I am afraid their sufferings are yet not over.
And by the way, I read about Runespoor in 'Fantastic beasts and where to find them.'
Also, for the purpose of this story, Hesita is a healer.
Thanks to everyone who reviewed as well as favorited and followed the story this time!:)
