Liz opened her eyes and was immediately confronted by the bizarre and contorted sleeping positions they had both managed to attain in the night. She was facing the wall on her side, and her legs were in some strange scissor-kicking position down at the bottom of the bed. Red was on his side as well, facing outward, his legs tucked up almost to his chest to accommodate her legs at the end—or maybe it was the other way around, and she was scrunched down there because his ass was firmly pressed into the small of her back, slowly squishing her down there in a blatant attempt to manifest destiny over the rest of the twin mattress.

Either way, Liz had to stifle her chuckles as they were aggravating her newly acquired aches and pains. She managed to crawl up the length of the bed until her head was back on her pillow. She turned on her side, facing Red's back, and settled in, pulling her blanket back up over her. If she'd been worried about a repeat performance of the prior morning, all fears were now assuaged. She laughed a little again at the irony of it.

Red stirred, half-awake, straightened his legs and stretched a bit. He looked over his shoulder as though to be certain she was still there. She slid her arm around his waist in reassurance. Red caught her hand in his own and held it against his chest. He shifted until his back was against her even as she was pulling herself closer to him. She held him tightly, spooning him fiercely, as though she wouldn't get the chance to do it ever again. He ran his thumb over her hand intermittently, still clasping it against his chest.

They lay like that for awhile, neither bothering to get up and turn on the light. Liz imagined them staying like this down here for the next three days straight…just holding one another and telling each other stories. What was it Red had said about that fourth day he spent hiding underground? About feeling peace? Well, here it was. The world could tear itself to pieces outside, and they wouldn't even notice. Or care.

She buried her face between his shoulder blades and inhaled. Deeply.

Red sighed a deep contented sigh.

"Good morning," he rumbled.

"Good morning," she whispered back. She leaned in and kissed the back of his shoulder. She saw Red's cheekbones flare from behind and knew he was smiling. She squeezed him again affectionately, and he accepted the embrace, squeezing her hand in return against his chest tightly.

He stretched in her arms a few moments later, really starting to awaken, and Liz heard him wince.

"This bed is too small," he grumbled.

"Yeah, no kidding," she sighed, then smirked. "Do you think Eli would be scandalized if we pushed the beds together?"

"No, he wouldn't…" Red sounded optimistic about the suggestion. "..But I might be," he intoned with a chuckle.

"Well," Liz sighed, "You'll have to get over it, or sleep alone, because my whole body hurts from sleeping with you, and we didn't even do anything fun," she teased. Red groaned into his pillow.

She let her hand trail idly over his pectoral muscles, down the front of his chest, and back up again. She could feel the strength he had beneath his skin, sense the solid weight of his muscles under his soft cotton t-shirt. Red hummed his approval of her lazy exploration. Emboldened, she pressed a brief kiss to the side of his neck. He groaned, and it was music to her ears. She wished he would roll over so she could kiss him properly, but he seemed content to lay where he was while she ran her hands over him…at least he wasn't trying to stop her.

She trailed her hand down over his soft stomach and felt him reflexively attempt to suck it in. She squeezed him hard then, right around his middle. He wasn't obese, and he had twenty years on her…what did a little softness matter? It was Red…that was all that mattered to her.

Besides, Tom had been in great shape, and he was never half as exciting or arousing to her as Red was right now.

Liz leaned in and placed a tender kiss at the base of his neck. He savored it with a soft moan. She rubbed his stomach and nuzzled him.

"Are you always this…affectionate in the morning?" Red murmured, his tone delighted. He looked back at her over his shoulder with a smirk on his face, "but you're so grumpy first thing at work," he teased. Liz pinched his side playfully hard enough to make him jump, and Red chuckled.

The hem of his t-shirt was bunched at his hip. Liz slid her hand beneath it stealthily, savoring the feel of his warm flesh, then moved it up the length of Red's back…

He flailed and nearly hit her in a frantic attempt to get away. He jumped out of the bed and whirled around to face her. Her hand was still outstretched in mid-air.

She stared at him, horrified, trying to make sense of what she'd just felt—skin that was puckered in some parts then alternately far too smooth, too warm in some places and cold and lifeless in others. What had happened to his back?

His eyes were bright on hers, watching. Eventually he looked down at the floor and simply stood there, waiting for her to speak, unable to speak himself.

Liz crawled to the edge of the bed and rose up on her knees. She was nearly eye-level with him. She reached out, took his hand, and pulled him to her. She encircled him in her arms and rested her chin on his shoulder. He leaned into her embrace, but did not reciprocate it.

"Will you show me?" she whispered, a sinking feeling in her stomach.

"Yes," Red muttered in response. "But know that I never intended for you to see this, Elizabeth…I'm sorry," he stepped back and eyed her sadly. He moved to the light switch and flicked it on. They both blinked, truly looking at one another for the first time that day. Liz gave him a small smile as he returned, and he simply gazed at her. Then he turned around with a sigh and presented his back to her, standing straight, stiff—an officer ready for inspection.

Wanting to make this as quick and painless as possible, feeling sick, Liz stood and unhesitatingly gripped the hem of his shirt, lifting it up to his shoulders. Her hiss of shock and horror was so loud in the tiny room, Red flinched.

Burns. God. Liz knew burns…and scars, she knew scars. She looked away from his back to look down at her own scar, and she knew, just deep down knew, how Red had gotten his. Red was the man on the floor that night. Red was the man on the floor that night, on fire, in front of her.

She didn't realize she was sobbing until Red turned around and clutched her to him.

"Shhh," he soothed her. "Stop it, Lizzie. This isn't necessary." He lifted her wrist to his mouth and placed a sweet kiss to her own scar, and she cried harder. "No," he was almost exasperated. "Sweetheart…"

She wrapped her arms around him and put her face into his shoulder. She imagined the scar on her wrist spread across the expanse of her back and shuddered. It would be hideous. It would have to be explained every time she let a man touch her…and maybe some wouldn't want to after they saw it. She imagined shame and repulsion. It was no wonder he wore three piece suits to cover up such a damaged and ruined sight. How had she never seen him with his shirt off before? For all the times he'd been wounded, tortured, or something exploded next to him…all those times they had been inadvertently exposed to one another, and she had never seen this. It had to be one of his most preciously guarded secrets…a secret he hadn't wanted to share with her, a secret, like so many others, he wanted to protect her from.

He simply held her and let her cry herself out, let her hug him so hard she literally forced the air out of his lungs. Then she stepped away from him, grateful when he didn't attempt to follow her.

"Why didn't you ever tell me?" she hissed, and then cringed once again to think of all the times she had been cruel to him, or called him damaged. She cringed down deep, so hard she almost couldn't breathe. "You just let me hate you, Red! You just let me hate you and be so mad at you, and the whole time, you have literally had that night—had ME—on your back like this?" She shook her head, not comprehending. "For years now, I've wondered who am I to Raymond Reddington? Why does he insist we have this connection?" She sighed. "But I guess you can't really ever forget pulling me out of the fire that night, huh?" she intoned dryly, making Red smirk despite the seriousness of the moment. "All this time…" she sighed again and shook her head at him. "Didn't you want to tell me?"

"Selfishly, at times, yes," he sighed. "I just didn't know how to do it. How could I tell you about this, show you this, and not have it seem like a manipulation? I knew it would hurt you, and I thought it also might drive you away," he groaned. "I thought maybe if I kept the past on my back, I could keep it off yours, sweetheart. I'm sorry," he muttered. He looked so defeated, it broke her heart. He shook his head bitterly, his mouth working furiously with unspoken thoughts. He looked over at her finally and sighed with deep regret. "That's everything Lizzie. You have everything now."

She was crying again, guilt-ridden and grief-stricken.

"I feel so stupid," she breathed. "All this time, and I had no idea…"

"I should have told you. Dembe told me to tell you. I should have listened, but I just…couldn't, Lizzie. I couldn't risk it."

"It shouldn't have felt like a risk," Liz ground out. "You should have been able to tell me, but I was so hard on you when I didn't need to be, and I kept things from you on purpose to hurt you" she paused and took a shuddery breath. "I can see why you didn't tell me at first…but Red! Oh, if you'd told me this from the beginning, I would have believed you, I swear!"

It made her sick to imagine, to imagine how it might all have been so different. What would have happened if he had just told her the truth? All of it?

"We could have truly been in this together, Red! From the beginning! I could have trusted you from the start, but you didn't give me the chance," she growled at him in sudden frustration and anger. "We've wasted so much time, you idiot!"

She reached out suddenly and pushed him backwards. He sat down on the bed hard. She was in front of him immediately, forcing him to spread his knees and standing between them. She reached for his face, cupping his jaw with both hands, gentling herself purposefully and running her thumbs over his morning stubble. She tilted his head until his eyes met hers and smiled sweetly, tears blurring her vision until she blinked them free.

His hands went immediately to her hips. He gripped them hard until she leaned down and tenderly kissed the top of his head, still cradling his jaw. His grip slackened then, and he looked up at her in shocked pleasure. His expression shifted from surprised to pleased as she leaned down again and pulled his mouth to hers for the sweetest touch of her flesh to his…just a touch, just a tease, full of promise, renewal, and springtime. He groaned, tears suddenly in his own eyes for some unfathomable reason.

"Lizzie," he rumbled in a dark tone that made her suddenly ache for him.

She didn't wait to hear the rest of what he was about to say, she couldn't help herself. She kissed him fully, deeply, reveling in the delightful friction of her lips against his. She captured his mouth again and again, and he pulled her into his lap, suddenly, predatorily, so that she was straddling him.

"God, yes," she moaned. "Red…"

He was rock hard and tucked right up against her in just the right spot between her legs. She ground herself against him experimentally, their respective sleepwear doing little to limit the sensation. He groaned hard and slid his hands into her hair at the base of her skull. He pulled her mouth to his and she squirmed against him again, delighting in the way he twitched and involuntarily grasped at her hips to still her.

"Lizzie," he practically giggled as he kissed her collarbone, then slipped his tongue in and out of the small hollow he found there. She gasped and deliberately ground herself along his length in retaliation. "Oh, please," he groaned into her neck. "Please don't do that again, sweetheart…I feel like I'm thirteen years old. I've been hard since I woke up next to you."

"Really?" She stopped moving but kept herself firmly pressed against him, making sure he stayed aroused. She grinned down at him wickedly, and he smirked right back, ever present and waiting for her next move. He watched her raptly as she leaned back slowly, deliberately, keeping her hands on his shoulders, making certain that entirety of her clothed sex was pressed up against his. Red realized what she was doing, his eyes widening. She moved against him at the new angle again, and then again, brazenly, wantonly, while he clutched at her and desperately tried to get her to stop.

"Elizabeth!" he hissed, trying to convey his serious displeasure over being forced to cum in his pants like an adolescent while trying to simultaneously hold back his encouraging groans and pants of lust as she moved over him.

She chuckled, clearly enjoying his distress. She felt a surge of power and astonishment to think she could elicit such a response from him. His eyes narrowed. He gripped her waist and pulled her upwards so that she no longer able to grind up against him. He quivered beneath her, hovering on the edge

"You're so hard for me," she muttered wickedly into the shell of his ear. "It's so hot," she breathed before suckling his earlobe, earning a desperate moan from the poor, tortured man beneath her. She slid her right hand up beneath his shirt and pressed her scar against his back, let her own burned flesh mingle with its mate. Red moaned again at the touch. Then, she slid back downward and ground her hips against him in a long, sensuous swivel that made him grunt and thrust up against her.

"Goddamn it, Lizzie!" he groaned. He shuddered and came, pressed against the juncture of her hip and thigh, his faced buried in her neck. She could feel him pulsing against her and groaned at the sudden rush of heat and liquid to her own core in response. Nothing had ever turned her on as much as feeling and seeing this man come apart against her. She kissed the top of his head. Red might be annoyed at her for doing this, but at least he got off on it. She, on the other hand, was going to have to play it cool under some very slippery circumstances.

His forehead was pressed to her chest and his hands were hard on her hips, holding her against him. She wrapped her arms around his torso and nuzzled the top of his head, feeling just the slightest bit smug.

"That was a dirty trick you just pulled," Red grumbled breathlessly into her collarbone.

"Yeah, it was," She grinned at the ceiling in triumph. He learned back and studied her face in irritation.

"You seem pretty pleased with yourself," he growled.

"Mmmhmm, I enjoyed that almost as much as you did," she smiled beatifically down at him.

"This isn't a game, Elizabeth," he sighed, motioning her off him and standing up. "I'm not playing with you now!"

"Oh…did you want to do that later?" she quipped, knowing that it was maybe one too far, but still trying maintain a lighthearted tone. He shot her a furious, withering look over his shoulder. She sighed and tried not to roll her eyes. "Come on, Red. We were having fun! What's wrong?."

"That was not how I wanted our first…encounter…to be," he bit out, his mouth working furiously once more. He looked so…disappointed.

"Red…" Liz rubbed her scar and looked away from him, trying to understand where he was coming from. "I'm sorry. Please…don't be mad. I got a little carried away."

"I asked you to stop," he said simply and she winced. He grabbed a clean towel from the shelf. With his back still to her, he wrapped the towel around his waist and tucked it in over his pajama bottoms and t-shirt. Then, he turned and came back to the bed, and Liz realized he was trying to cover up any tell-tale evidence of his orgasm. It was so…prudish—something she never would have expected from someone like Raymond Reddington. She tried to stop smiling at the ridiculous sight as he leaned down and pulled his bag from beneath the bed, but she couldn't help herself.

"Red…" she tried again, but he didn't look at her, just gathered his things for the shower.

"Lizzie I've dreamed of waking up next to you since we first met," Red suddenly sighed, and Liz felt her breath catch in her throat. "And this morning it happened…and it was so…" he paused as though savoring the memory, and the expression on his face nearly broke her heart. Suddenly, Liz understood. That morning had been so sweetly sincere, affectionate and intimate—it made her grinding on his lap and taking advantage of his excitement for her seem so foolish and spiteful in comparison.

"Oh god," she groaned in sudden embarrassment. "I swear, I didn't mean to do that to you…embarrass you like that…"

He stood, holding his things for the shower. She jumped up and put her hands on his shoulders so that he faced her. She studied his expression, not sure what to say next.

"You've really dreamed of waking up next to me?" she finally smirked. "You might have known better…Clearly I'm unstable first thing in the morning…"

She moved up on tiptoes and placed a brief kiss to the underside of his jawline. He scoffed a little and relaxed even less. "I also don't think too hard about the consequences of my actions, sometimes," she sighed looking at him seriously. "You know this about me, Red."

He sighed and nodded slightly, a grim smile beginning to work it's way about his mouth.

"I'm also selfish," she added. "Sometimes I only think about myself, about what I want…"

She stepped in a little closer and put her mouth up next to his ear. "I wanted to make you cum for me…and you were so good,"she darted in and pressed her mouth to his neck quickly. "You were so good for me," she purred.

Red growled and stepped away from her quickly, clutching his clothing and shower kit to his chest as though to ward her off. She gasped and laughed lightly.

"What has gotten into you?" he chuffed, awed and pleased, and then concerned. "Lizzie…"

"Shhh…she shook her head at him. "It's okay. Go take your shower. I'll make us some coffee."

He studied her for a moment, tilted his head to the side and observed her keenly. She smiled at him warmly, happily. He took a deep breath and closed the gap between them to press a chaste kiss to her lips. She wrapped her arms around him and leaned up to whisper in his ear once more.

"I really am sorry. I didn't mean to make you feel degraded. You mean so much to me…I was so excited to see you finally enjoy yourself."

"I may have…overreacted," he muttered, bending down to put his mouth to the juncture of her neck and shoulders. "I never anticipated that happening," he added ruefully.

She chuckled richly into ear and ran her hands over the length of his torso. "It was so fucking hot, Red, I swear. You can't possibly know what it did to me…to know I could do that to you."

She was rubbing up against him again, like a cat in heat. Even though he had just cum, Red felt his cock twitch hopefully. He had to get away from her. He needed a moment to think and it simply wasn't possible next to her, looking at her, smelling her hair, her skin, kissing her mouth…

"Shower," he blurted suddenly. Liz stepped back from him, startled.

"Okay," she responded uncertainly. "Coffee."

"Okay," he nodded. "Good plan."

He turned on his heel and made his escape to the bathroom while Liz looked on in amusement.


The next chapter and the rest of this story will be mostly "M" henceforward. Then a small break for fluff. Then "M" again.