Iruka was having a crappy day. His sleep the night before had been broken up by a series of nightmares where faceless people chased him and threw fruit pies. (He wasn't even going to try to figure out what his psyche was trying to tell him with that one.)
Then he overslept and was almost late for his first class, where the students appeared to have ingested nothing but sugar and caffeine for breakfast. They were hyperactive hellions the entire day and not even a pop-quiz could quiet them down. He finally had to resort to an "endurance exercise," also known as a 5-mile run. That had succeeded in tiring them out enough to finish the school day, but it meant that Iruka was now wearing a spare uniform from the teacher's lockers because his had been soaked through. So he didn't stink of sweat, but he did smell like mothballs and the scent kept making him sneeze.
And now he was stuck on the mission desk. It was Friday afternoon and everyone else had had the foresight to ask off. He, however, hadn't been thinking about the possibility of starting his weekend early. He'd been thinking about…well, never mind that. He just wasn't going to think about certain jounin who should know when they're being offered something good.
Stupid Kakashi…
Stupid Gai…
Stupid challenge…
Stupid Iruka… What did the other chuunin always say? "Meddle not in the affairs of jounin for they are crazy and will stab you with a kunai." Hmmm… That didn't sound right. Oh, well. The point was that he was stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid for ever thinking he could make friends with someone who obviously hated him.
Stupid hormones.
Stupid being-single-for-too-many-years.
Stupid.
"So I said, 'Don't be stupid, of course you can bring your twin along!'"
What? Oh. Right. Genma. The special jounin was the only other person in the mission room. Iruka looked up from the paper he'd been trying to grade for twenty minutes and attempted to follow the conversation. "She has a twin?"
Genma nodded enthusiastically, "Yep! And it turns out they do everything together." He grinned at Iruka roguishly, obviously waiting for a "congrats on bagging twins" or something like that.
Unfortunately for him, Iruka was in no mood to play along. "Genma, that's disgusting. They're sisters."
"So what? If they don't care, why should I? You should have come with me. I'd have shared!"
"Genma! I'm gay! And ew!"
"Oh, right. Well, then you'll like this story: there was this diplomatic attaché from Mist. He had the tightest, hottest ass I've ever seen…or felt! This one time…"
As the man's voice washed over him, Iruka wondered idly if he could throw himself at Genma, hopefully stabbing himself on the jounin's ever present senbon and thereby passing out from the poison, or if that would be seen as a come-on by the horny bastard.
He looked back down at his papers. The words on them swirled in a haze. Ugh. Now he had a headache. Great, just great. Giving up on schoolwork for the time being, he shuffled the papers into a stack and stuffed them back into his bag. Maybe there was something else he could get done instead of grading. As he looked back up to see what work was laying around, he saw that Genma was looking at him shrewdly. "What?"
Genma waited a moment before answering. Finally he said, "Iruka, are you okay? You seem down today."
Iruka gave him what he hoped was an off-hand, relaxed grin. "No, I'm fine." Genma kept staring at him, his eyes narrowed. "Really. Everything's okay. I just didn't sleep well last night."
"What does this have to do with Kakashi?" Genma asked.
Iruka's head whipped up. "Nothing. It has nothing to do with him."
"Really. So you didn't go on a date together a week or so ago?"
Iruka sighed. "It wasn't a date. Not really. It was…well, I don't know what it was, but it wasn't a date. We just…had dinner. That's all."
"Did you enjoy yourself?"
"I guess…I mean…It's just so hard! Every time we talk, we fight! It's like we simply shouldn't speak to each other. But at dinner…we did manage to talk, not about anything really important, but we talked. And…it was nice…and then…" Iruka's voice trailed off.
"And then?" Genma prompted.
"I don't know. I guess I just pushed things too hard or didn't say it in the right way. I don't know."
"Maybe neither of you is hearing what the other one has to say or neither of you is saying what needs to be said." Genma suggested.
"What do you mean?" Iruka asked.
"Well, you're both pretty private people. Maybe you think you're sharing a lot when you actually aren't and maybe you think you're really listening when you aren't."
"That might be true for Kakashi, but I'm not that private of a person." Iruka protested.
Genma laughed. "You're kidding, right?" When Iruka stared at him blankly, Genma broke off his laughter. "No, you aren't. You're serious. You actually think that you're an open book?" He paused, looking for the right words. "Iruka, why don't we hang out together outside of work?"
"Because I don't want to interrupt your dates," Iruka replied, confused.
"No, it's because I stopped asking after the first few times you turned me down," Genma corrected.
"What do you mean? I'm not going to go on dates with you. Ew!"
"Iruka, if I ask you to come to dinner with me and friends, then it isn't a date," Genma explained patiently. "Especially if Anko's involved. Then it definitely isn't a date." He shuddered. "I prefer my dates a little less…"
"Intelligent?" Iruka suggested wryly.
Genma laughed, unoffended. "Yeah, that's true! But back to what I was saying, it's not just that you don't hang out with me. You don't hang out with anyone, especially since Naruto left."
Iruka sputtered in protest. "That's not true! I was at the Hyuuga complex last month for dinner."
"First of all, parent/teacher conferences don't count. Second of all, the Hyuuga's definitely don't count. And third, 'last month'? Haven't you gotten together with anyone since then?"
Iruka thought about it. Then, when he was unable to come up with an answer, he began to realize that Genma might actually have a point. That was a scary thought.
The jounin took his silence as confirmation. "Yep, that's what I thought." He leaned on the table next to Iruka's chair. "I don't think this thing you have for Kakashi is bad." He waved off the teacher's attempts at a protest. "Don't deny it. I can tell you want him. It's in your eyes every time you look at him." This time Iruka looked horrorstruck and his cheeks flushed red. "It's okay," Genma reassured him, "You hide it pretty well from most people. I can just tell because I'm a slut. I know lust when I see it." He grinned at Iruka.
"Alright, fine, say I do have a 'thing' for Kakashi," Iruka replied, ignoring the grin, "So what?"
"So, I think it's a good fit for you. And for him, come to think of it. But, because of your personalities, you are going to have to know that it might take him a while to come around. You two are tough nuts to crack and I don't see either of you giving into the other easily. I could be wrong, but that's what I think." Genma returned to staring at Iruka with his shrewdest gaze. "What would help is if you would both realize that you aren't alone, that you have friends if you'll only accept us."
Iruka's eyes prickled and his cheeks filled with familiar warmth. "Thanks, Genma. That means a lot. And I'm sorry I haven't been a better friend."
The jounin waved his hand airily. "Nonsense. Just promise me dinner and we're even."
"Of course. I'd love to." Iruka smiled at him, feeling better than he had all day.
Genma took the smile as an invitation to continue with his story. "So anyway, this attaché had this amazing trick with his tongue…"
