Previously on Breaking Through!

Naruto's allowed himself to be captured by Sasuke after attempting suicide. Sasuke has taken him to join the wonderful life of the cavern people! He just needs to get the OK from their leader, Garhette, to be completely accepted by the cavern-ers. Today is the day, yo!

Make sure to check the AN at the end XD


Chapter 8: The Memory

One could say that the walk to their cavern room could be categorized as a 'walk of shame' for the two ninja. Everyone they passed in the tunnel halls giggled and blushed when eyesight was met. It became very apparent then, that Sasuke's moans traveled well through the echoing tunnels earlier. The raven groaned, drained of his previous Uchiha-pride reputation that he had once held. Stupid dobe with his stupid hot dominance and stupid gorgeous-as-fuck body... Sasuke thought bitterly as they entered their shared cavern room for the third time that day.

"You still feel like sleeping?" Naruto asked curiously, feeling alert and awake.

"Hn. I'm exhausted." Sasuke mumbled, lying down on the comfortable bedspread.

"Yeah, I bet. Your vocal chords went through quite the workout this morning, huh?" The blonde jinchuriki winked and only laughed when Sasuke punched his arm.

Naruto joined him shortly on the bed afterwards, though he moved around every so often with discomfort. His leg twitched so occasionally that the youngest Uchiha actually slapped it irritably.

"Dobe, quit your spasm-ing."

"Sorry, S'ke..." Naruto readjusted himself for what seemed like the thirtieth time. It was only a matter of minutes before the blonde nudged Sasuke with his toe. "Sasuke?" He whispered, "S'ke, you awake?"

"No." The raven groaned. He rolled over on his side then, glaring at Naruto sleepily.

"Sasuke, what's gonna happen when I meet with Garhette?" The blonde shyly asked, leaning close to the raven. There was silence and then a small reply of "I'm not really supposed to tell you."

"Come on, you can tell me. Please?" Naruto's nervous eyes dug into Sasuke's apathetic ones. He kissed the raven's lips slowly then, just like he knew Sasuke liked it. The Uchiha's eyes closed as he absorbed the warmness that was Naruto. He sighed sadly.

"I really don't feel like talking about it." He admitted lethargic-ly, feeling sleepier than before with this new sense of heat.

"Please?" Naruto pouted against the raven's lips, flicking his tongue out and running it slowly over the pale lips. Sasuke let out a breath of eagerness. Why did the blonde always make him so excited?

"...Fine." Sasuke pulled away to breathe. "When you go to see Garhette tomorrow, well, he'll do this thing where he sits you down and opens up your mind."
Naruto flinched, sitting back. "Open my mind? Like some sort of memory-revealing jutsu?"

Sasuke nodded. "He says that if you can't share your most traumatic experiences with those who have encountered the same or worse, that you don't belong here."

"And you did it?"

"Yeah. It's not like anyone could truly understand my pain even then, though. Garhette just kind of does this jutsu where he projects your memories and feelings to everyone. He sorts through your whole life and chooses what to show to everyone." Sasuke explained without interest. Looking back on his own experience of being subject to the jutsu, it wasn't that bad. He didn't care what anyone thought, he didn't need pity or acceptance. They could either deal with him or send him on his way, no tears involved.

But after stealing a glance at the blonde, Sasuke realized that it wouldn't be the same case with the dobe. Naruto's azure blue eyes were wide with fear of being exposed. Exposed as being a monster, of being an outsider, of being weak. Sasuke caressed his whiskered cheek affectionately.

"Naruto?"

"...yes?"

The raven's eyes narrowed. "What are you hiding?" With that comment, Naruto visibly tensed. His eyes flashed everywhere around the room, avoiding Sasuke's knowing gaze.

"I-I'm not—"
"—hiding anything? Bullshit. I know you're not telling me something. It's something about that nightmare, isn't it?" The raven growled accusingly, sending the jinchuriki into a state of some sort of shock.

"You remember that, eh?" Naruto chuckled nervously.

"Hn." Which obviously translated to a strict 'Of course, you idiot, I'm an Uchiha. So tell me what's going on this instant before I go all scary-chidori on your ass.'

"I can't tell you, Sasuke. I...just can't..." Naruto rubbed his nose and began to sniffle. Before he knew it, warm tears were rolling down his cheeks. He wiped at them angrily, "God damnit, why a-am I crying?! I'm s-such a moron..." Somehow hearing those words come from the blonde's mouth, and not his own, Sasuke felt his poker-face crumple with worry.

"Wait, wait, Naruto...What...What happened?" The raven put a hand on Naruto's shoulder as it shook with sobs. "Dob—Naruto, I mean, you can tell me. Tell me." His deep voice echoed in the silence that followed after it, waiting for the blonde to pull himself together.

"I...Are you sure you want to know?" Naruto bit his lip nervously.

"Hn." The Uchiha nodded in response.

Empty quietness filled the room again as Naruto shifted around uncomfortably, staring at his hands. Trying to build up the courage to say what needed to be said. His mouth opened only to snap shut again, a thick substance filling up his throat. Stealing his oxygen and confidence all in one breath.

Silence.

Silence.

A shuddery-deep breath.

Silence.

And then, finally, "I was raped."

"Oh my god." Sasuke cupped his hand over his mouth and held back a scream. He felt anger build up inside him, ready to burst. He wanted to kill someone.

"It happened last year. At my eighteenth birthday party." Naruto said dryly, eyes darkening at the memory. "Pretty fucked up, huh? I mean, happy birthday to me. No better present than having your virginity taken away by force." His voice was now monotone as the blonde stared at the bedspread with disinterest. He wondered why it was easier to talk about it without making eye contact.

Maybe it was because he didn't want to see the pity in Sasuke's normally filtered eyes. He didn't want to see the anger, or the fright. He didn't deserve it.
"I guess it's my fault though for drinking. For not watching my drink. For trusting people. For not being strong enough to save myself. For—"

Sasuke shot up and slapped a hand over Naruto's mouth now, looking furious. "Shut up, dobe! Don't you ever say that. Don't you ever say that." The raven cried out, upset. He held his head in his hands then, trying to contain the murderer inside him that so wanted to escape. "Who did this to you, Naruto?"

More Silence.

"Naruto," Sasuke's voice strained, "Tell me, tell me who in the fuck thought they had the right to do that to you!" He grabbed hold of the blonde and shook him by his shoulders violently.

"G-Gaara! It was Gaara!" Naruto yelled. "Stop shaking me, Bastard!"
Sasuke froze, releasing the jinchuriki quickly. "…Gaara? He…Oh my fucking God, I'm gonna kill him. I'm going to fucking kill that bastard!" Sasuke whispered venomously, clawing at the bed-sheets.

"Sasuke, don't. Please? I just want to move on. Please…" Naruto pouted, boring his eyes into Sasuke's desperately. The last thing he needed was an all-out battle between Gaara and the Uchiha.

Sasuke took a deep breath. "Fine, fine." He huffed, not even bothering to hide the fact that he was more than pissed off. Naruto gave him a disbelieving look. "Seriously, fine. I won't kill him. I'll destroy him some other way…" He added the last part so silently; Naruto forced himself to ignore it.

"…So now you know why…why I have such terrible nightmares. And why I'm nervous about Garhette exposing me tomorrow morning…" The blonde mumbled sadly.

"Hn. You've barely told me anything, dobe." Sasuke leaned towards Naruto, giving him a look that gently said 'you can tell me, please'. For everyone who'd tried to talk to Naruto before at the village, trying to cheer him up or get him to admit why he'd changed so much since his eighteenth birthday party…they couldn't get a word out of him. But after just one look from the Uchiha?

Naruto told him everything.


Naruto strutted into the cavern business room without a pause. He shook Garhette's hand without hesitation. He seated himself and stared at the colossal group of cavern folk without flinching. No matter how desperately he wished to escape, he was tired of running away. He needed to face his current issue head on. He was ready.

"Naruto Uzumaki." Garhette spoke with a booming voice. He was surprisingly a lean man, with silky beige skin and auburn-red hair. He had kind yet stern hazel eyes as well, eyes that seemed to know everything. He stood in the front of the room, next to Naruto and facing the crowd casually.

There were really way too many people in room, for a majority of the cavern's population had shown up. The ages ranged from teens to the elderly.

"Today, you are in trial. This trial will expose you completely as who you were and are presently. Your most inner secrets will be presented to the crowd exactly as you experienced them, including all thoughts and feelings. Understand?" Garhette's loud voice echoed harshly.

"Yes, Sir." Naruto said evenly, only staring straight ahead into the obsidian eyes of Sasuke.

"Good. Then I will proceed with my memory-showcasing justu." The leader laughed to himself then, for it was very uncommon that his victims were so submissive and calm as Naruto.

Ultimately, Garhette placed a hand on Naruto's forehead, pushing his bangs aside.

"Ready?"
The blonde ninja's colbat blue eyes met Sasuke's once more before they faded to a distant gray as the justu took place. His eyelids lowered halfway and his jaw lacked down a bit as Garhette proceeded. Every audience member's vision blurred before they were given a new view: Naruto Uzumaki.

Four years old. Alone. Hated.

Images of the blonde passed through everyone's sight. Images of him sitting by himself on a swing. Of failing at school and fitting in.

Naruto sat next to Iruka, smiling finally. They ate ramen.

Naruto being jealous of the young raven-haired Sasuke.

Them accidently kissing in class.

Them being forced into Team 7 together with Sakura.

The cavern inhabitants watched the jinchuriki getting better and stronger, learning new powers and making new friends along the way.

They watched the way he affected those around him. Konaha's sunshine.

And then,

Sasuke leaves in the middle of the night. Sakura's crying and Naruto promises to return the raven to their village, no matter what.

When they meet again at the Valley of End, there's a huge fight. Naruto loses. Sasuke says next time he'll kill the blonde on a whim.

After that came vigorous training with Pervy Sage, Jiraiya.

Naruto returns to the Leaf Village years later in high spirits, maturing. He meets Sasuke again with so much emotion built up in his chest. He keeps it to himself.

Naruto is now sixteen. The Akatsuki try to capture him on regular basis. They want to harness the power he never wanted, but he needs it still. To save Sasuke.

As the memories continued to flow, one though remained painfully clear: Save Sasuke.

Time flies quickly during that year.

Naruto is on his knees in front of the Raikage. He's begging him not to hurt Sasuke. He's already been broken-down by a beating that he took from the Raikage's ninja earlier. They wanted to know about Sasuke, but Naruto never spoke a word.

The Raikage refuses him anyway. Naruto is now lying in a room, alone, with a dead look in his eyes.
'Do you ever think about me and Sakura, Sasuke?' He thinks to himself.

Following soon after that, he saves Sakura from Sasuke. He tells Sasuke that he understands him. The Uchiha looks shocked, which pleases Naruto beyond reasoning. He takes note to remember that face as proof that there's still a real, emotional boy listening behind that famous cold glare.

Many things follow after that moment even faster. Jiraiya-sensei's death, then the battle against Pein, Kyuubi, himself. He's still trying to save Sasuke after the Great 4th Ninja War.
And finally,

It's October 10th, Naruto's eighteen years old. He's at his birthday party with all his friends, including Gaara and his sand- siblings.

The blonde is really enjoying himself, partially because he's drinking. He doesn't have enough conscious sense to realize when his drink starts to taste funny. He's still innocent.

And then everything is numb.

He's in Gaara's arms, hears him say "I'll take him home, Kakashi, he's pretty wasted."

Next, they're in a complex that Gaara has rented out, it's right outside the Leaf Village. Just far enough away that no one could hear them. Naruto feels absolutely sick.

"Naruto…" Gaara says, althoughit sounds hazy. The sand ninja doesn't wait for a response, but instead presses his mouth to Naruto's. He kisses the blonde hungrily; biting his tongue and intruding his personal space.

Naruto can't move, can't react. He doesn't like this.

"Gaara," he manages to croak out. The redhead pulls away and boldly says "I love you." If Naruto could flinch, he would.

"N-… Gaara, I—I love you too," the jinchuriki mumbles, "but only as a friend. I'm sorry…"

Gaara looks appalled. "But I love you, Naruto. I love you so much, I can't hold it in any longer." He resumes to furiously kiss Naruto's neck, pulling off his shirt simultaneously.

"Hey…stop…" Naruto fusses. Trying to regain his mobility.

"I love you, Naruto. I love you so much." Gaara repeats as he takes off the blonde's shorts and boxers in one swift movement. His hands roam over the tan body obsessively. "I want to make you feel good, Naru. Then you can love me too…"

"Gaara, no!' Naruto cries out and wiggles his heavy body in protect. Gaara slams his body back against the bed.

"No, you stay. You stay and I'll make you feel good. We'll be one, Naruto. I love you." Gaara gushes anxiously, cheeks burning from his own alcohol-accommodation.

He strips down naked and Naruto starts to cry. He doesn't want this.

He doesn't.

"Please, don't!" He pleads. Gaara backhands him harshly, then positions his member in front of Naruto's unprepared entrance.

"No, no, oh God, please, no…" The blonde hyperventilates. The redhead cups his cheek adoringly.

"Shh, let me love you. I want you to love me, Naruto." he coos before slamming into Naruto. The jinchuriki screams in agony and Gaara slaps him again. "Don't cry, Naru. Oh, I love you…I promise…" He pushes in and out of the broken shinobi roughly. Gaara is moaning in ecstasy as he thoughtlessly rams into Naruto's ass.

He pulls out a minute later.

"Naruto, tell me you love me. Say it."

But Naruto is only whimpering, "Sasukehelpme…Please, Sasuke, save me…"

Gaara scowls with disappointment. He hates that Naruto is always relying on that damn Uchiha.

"No, Naru. Sasuke isn't here, he doesn't love you like I do. Forget about him."

Naruto chokes on the air. "Gaara, stop please!" he's begging desperately now, only to receive a punch by the drunk sand ninja.

"Tell me you love me, Naruto!"

"Sasuke, save me, please, Sasuke!" the blonde yells and thrashes around to the best of his current ability. He then yelps as he takes another blow to the head and blood fills his mouth. The edges of his vision fly in and out of focus.

"Say you love me." Gaara growls, flipping Naruto's body over onto all fours. He takes position.
"I—I love you!" Naruto bawls. Gaara thrusts into him anyway, throwing the boy out of consciousness.

Naruto wakes up in his own apartment. He is alone, and wonders if it was al a dream. That hope is quickly shattered as he stands up, grimacing at the discomfort. He waddles to the bathroom and sees swollenly-bruised face staring back at him in the mirror.

Nobody saved him.


For the next couple weeks, Naruto doesn't leave his apartment; he doesn't even get out of bed. He has little food and water that he touches.

Nobody comes to save him.

He finally heads outside after the second week ends. The weather has chilled more so since his birthday has passed. Even the seasons haven't waited for him.

He parks himself on a bench that overlooks a meadow surrounded by trees. The cherry blossom trees have lost many of their leaves and their color is dulled. It makes the meadow look less beautiful and Naruto starts to feel bad for it's unfair condition.

So bad that starts to cry.

This is how Shikamaru finds him.

"N-Naruto? Are you okay?" He guffaws. Naruto looks up at the shadow-ninja with outstandingly sad eyes.

"It's not the meadow's fault that it's surrounded by assholes. Those trees drop their dead leaves and branches all over the meadow. Now others will only pass by it, thinking it looks ugly. And it's so dark in the meadow, because the trees shade it from the light. The meadow is obviously dying, yet no one tries to chop down those damn trees. Nobody tries to help the meadow—to save it!"

Naruto is bawling uncontrollably now, leaving Shikamaru stunned and confused.

Moments later he grasps the blonde by the arm and yanks him off the seat. He pulls the jinchuriki down to the meadow and lies down on his back, patting the spot next to him urgently.

Naruto joins Shikamaru reluctantly, head resting on his arms as hes tares up into the sky. The sun is rising, making the sky a breathtaking gradient of orange, pink, and blue.

Naruto gasps and takes in the wonderful view as Shikamaru's raspy voice begins to explain.
"It may look like the meadow is suffering, but if you get right down to its point of view; it's still experiencing this beauty. And in the spring and summer, the cherry blossoms will bloom and completely restore the view." The ninja smiles and lightly taps his fist against Naruto's uniform. "Sometimes you have to look for the best in the bad until things get good again."

The blonde lies there quietly, processing it all.

"I got raped on my birthday." He spews nonchalantly, although Shikamaru flinches at the news. He takes out a cigarette box, lights two, sticks one in his mouth and offers the other to Naruto.

"Want a smoke? I heard it helps with getting through the bad."
Naruto finds himself chuckling and plucks the nicotine-stick gracefully.
"Didn't Asuma-Sensei smoke?" He asks and sticks the cigarette between his lips.

"Yep." Shikamaru nods and takes a long drag from his.

Naruto smirks. "Isn't he dead?"

The shadow ninja shrugs. "Sure, but you don't see him worrying about now, do ya?" His light voice lightens towards the end of the sentence, becoming choked up with the sadness.

"True." Naruto admits and takes a huff of his own cigarette. It burns the back of his throat but he doesn't really care at this point.

Months later, he and Shikamaru are still meeting almost every morning to smoke and watch clouds together.

Naruto seems to enjoy this because they rarely even talk during these meetings. It just a distracting, yet comfortable, silence.

However, one morning Shikamaru didn't automatically hand Naruto a smoke when he arrives. Instead he stands waiting in the meadow.

"Naruto." he addresses seriously.

"Sup Shika?" The blonde grumbles curiously.

"We need to stop doing this. It's just keeping us from the real world and doing our jobs."

Naruto is taken aback but covers it with an irritated snort. "Really? What jobs?"

Shikamaru rolls his eyes. "I've go chunin exams to prepare, and you're gonna be Hokage."

"I can't be Hokage if I can't even rescue a friend…"

Shikamaru's eyes narrow and his hands are on his hips. "When was the last time you even went out and looked for Sasuke?" he questions angrily

Naruto freezes, his jaw actually dropping in surprise. How could he be so wrapped up in indulging himself in these cloud-watching days that he'd actually forget about Sasuke? It was unheard of.

"Y-you're right…" Naruto said, taking a deep breath. Feeling ashamed of himself he whispers "I…I have to go…" and with that he begins the trend of disappearing off and on for months.

He spent all of his time looking for that certain Raven, only stopping when Tsunade requested time to teach him about being Hokage.


After seeing the blonde ninja attempt suicide, and then allowed himself to be captured by Sasuke to escape to Konaha, the audience's vision returns to normal. Naruto's eyes regain their natural color. He looks out at the crowd of cavern-people who quietly show their respect.

They've been taught not to show any pity, anger, or understanding after a new member's mind has been showcased. Just taught to accept and move on.

Although some people in the crowd had tears streaming down their cheeks, they merely nodded at the blonde before taking their leave.

"You're more than qualified to stay here. Welcome, Naruto Uzumaki." Garhette announced before he left with all the other cavern members. Only Naruto and Sasuke remained in the room then.

The blonde wore a broken expression, the kind were his eyes seemed lifeless yet hopeful. Sasuke made his way to Naruto's chair and extended his hand out. The jinchuriki shakily pulled himself to his feet.

Sasuke took the chance to pull Naruto against himself then. The blonde latched on to Sasuke and began to sob. The raven held a hand firmly on his back, and used the other hand to stroke the blonde's hair.

As Naruto hiccupped violently, Sasuke had to reach up and wipe his own eyes before the dobe realized that he was crying too.


AN: Hahah...ha...I updated? yay? boo? Please don't throw things at me? DX

Okay, I'm gonna take the time to properly apologize for not updating this story is so...SOOOO long. School started up again, and i've just been so busy...whenever i find free time I usually use it to draw... not to mention that my fabulous father has caught me reading some very VERY kinky yaoi...had to be on probation for a while (lololol i've still been reading it all the time tho XD I'm sorry dad! but writing is a lot harder to hide, surprisingly...) But anyway, I hope I can try to update more now? No promises.

Perhaps if I got some sort of beta to edit my stuff...i'm so lazy ;u;

If you'd like to harass me constantly to update, feel free to contact me on my dA

I've also got new story ideas too, though i'd like to get SOMEWHERE with this one -laughs to self sadly- Luckily, i do know how i want to end this fic, so its just a matter of filling in the spaces, so to speak?

one last announcement. Okay maybe 3. Do you guys like teen titans? Specifically, do you like/love/adore/obsess over/need/lust after SLADIN? (slade x robin)? ? ? ? LKljfksajf

guys, i've discovered the beauty of sladin. my dear sweet baby jesus, its so...hot! *faints with nosebleed*

go check out wynja's stuff if you've got the free time. I like her 2060 and Black Sheep series, although she's an amazing writer all in all! no joke, she's now my fav author 3

If you guys do like that, i might write one too? I think i'd just have to do some drabbles to get started...never experimented with sladin before! -squeals-

Okay last announcement is that I'm going to Taoyou Con here in Mesa, Arizona! My lovely friend Yvonne and I are going to cosplay as mordecai and rigby (my first cosplay, woohoo!) I'm super excited, and it's been decided that Yvonne and I are now cosplay partners(: we shall cosplay all the things! (naruto, blue exorcists, adventure time, regular show, teen titans, Legend of Korra, Legend of Zelda, and maybe homestuck *if either of us can actually sit down and read the damn thing COUGH**)

So yeah, I'll start keeping updates of the cons i'm going too on my dA and my youtube account after this one in January(: lemme know if you're going to any of the same or if you have any suggestions for some i should try out? We're also planning on being at the San Diego Comicon next year, so it'd be chill to say hi to any of you guys!

Thanks for dealing with my flippin long author's note -_-" i apologize again! To avoid more of these, i'd review if i were you? ;D later!