AN: Holy fucking ass crackers, it's been a long time since I last updated...! But in my defense, my laptop monitor (my primary typing thingamajig) is broken. Hell, it still is. Thank god it has a plug-in for a monitor... Even though it's a 50lb behemoth.

Hm... What have I been doing for the past... Several months? Well, I hath been playing viddy games. I beat ff13, the single player mode of Monster Hunter Tri, played DQ8, some Dissidia: Final Fantasy, invested 80+ hours into Monster Hunter Freedom Unite, the works. I've also slept an unrealistic amount. Hooray for summer vacation! Whee!

Big events in the manga...! HORY SHEET! Gin's a good guy? Meh, I sorta saw it coming. I feel that he really isn't a good guy, per se... But has people he wishes to protect (Rangiku, perhaps...?) and that's why he kept himself close to Aizen.

Anyway, on to the fic. If I skew any of my fanon facts, it's cuz I haven't been working on this for a long-ass time... So bear with me. This chapter will be mostly filler so's I can get back into the groove of writing fanfiction. It doesn't really help that I'm watching Gilbert Gottfried on Comedy central as I am typing this up... That screechy voice is somethin' else.

I do not own Bleach the series... However I DO have some bleach under the sink. Does that work...?

Rise of the Fallen Emperor Chapter 8: Bass-ackward Shullbit

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Ichigo was bored. Oh so bored. Why, you ask? Well, the main reason is due to the fact that the whiteness is starting to get to him. White walls, white carpets, white cement, white Ulquiorra, you name it, Los Noches has it in every color; as long as it's white.

"I can't even begin to imagine the laundry in this place..." Ichigo thought dryly. The orange-haired arrancar sighed and pulled a paintbrush from nowhere, as well as a paint palette. Halibel took this moment to walk down that same nondescript hallway to find Ichigo channeling his inner Picasso. Halibel looked on in amusement as Ichigo painted Chappy getting splattered with a waffle iron in vivid detail.

"Hah! Told ya I was a better artist... Damn midget." Ichigo mutters indignantly to himself. "How's this for ya, Captain Cupcake?"

"I think the boy has lost it." Halibel mused. "I wonder how long it'll be before someone else comes across this mural..."

"Interesting..." Halibel finally spoke. "Bored, are we...?"

If Halibel knew any better, she could have sworn she saw Ichigo's head rotate 180 degrees and then growl, making smoke come from his ears. She shook her head slightly and blinked to see that he was, indeed, growling. (but the whole possession thing must have been from lack of sleep.) The act had the opposite effect than intended (if Ichigo was intending anything to begin with.) as Halibel found it rather... Cute.

"He's like an angry puppy..." She snickered mentally. "I think I should give him something productive to do so as to make sure he doesn't start sculpting statues with a spork."

Yes, Ichigo has fallen to the greatest weakness to teenage boys, (besides hormones, porn, girls, boobs, asses, sex, etc etc.) boredom. This is further compounded by the fact that every hallway looks the same, dammit!

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Grimmjow was busy. He recently developed a minor OCD attribute. Must be all the stress that's been attacking him like a rabid chipmunk lately. He's been wandering the hallways with spackle, making sure that there are no imperfections in ANY of the many identical hallways. He had just finished his latest round when he came across an odd mural of a strange plush lion-thing getting tossed into a wood chipper, with a demented Ichigo laughing like crazy, as well as many females breathing a sigh of relief in the background. It didn't take a genius to figure out who painted that monstrosity... With several curses, the blue haired arrancar got to work cleaning the abomination off of his walls.

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"So, we're not allowed to train for the next three days...?" Halibel asked Tousen, having put Ichigo on a leash and yanking him away from the mural he had been painting. He had taken to gnawing on it quite viciously, much to Halibel's amusement. Her fracciones had also decided poking the boy with a stick would be in their best interests at the moment. After all, how often do weaker arrancar get the chance to do something like that to a really powerful one? Currently, the tally is at one.

"Indeed, Halibel-san. Aizen wants the arrancar to be at full strength for the operation that will be performed at that time." Tousen clarified. Halibel sighed and looked at her prisoner being prodded by her possibly deviant fracciones. "I recommend that you keep Ichigo-san on that leash so he doesn't go around spreading his... Art... Out of boredom."

"Affirmative, Tousen-sama." She saluted, turning and addressing her trio of deviants. "Girls, please let Ichigo-kun alone. As unstable as his soul is at the moment, the boredom is only compounding it. He could break out of this leash at any moment should he really remember that this is an ordinary leash..." Mila-Rose, Sun-Sun and Apache sweatdropped and stepped back rather quickly in an attempt to get away from the now foaming Ichigo. When Tousen and the girls had left, Halibel looked at her prisoner with an incredulous deadpan stare.

"How about a game of checkers, or chess...?" She said after a minute. "I am pretty sure that you'll tire of acting like a rabid dog soon enough." Ichigo stopped his resisting and shrugged, and wiped the shaving cream off of his face. Halibel quipped an eyebrow, wondering when he got the chance to grab a can of the stuff, but filed it away under 'don't ask, the answer is more confusing than the question'.

"Eh, you're right. I did enjoy the look on the faces of your fracciones though when you told them I could break out at any time..." Ichigo chuckled, undoing the collar. "So, whose room are we gonna do it in...?" Ichigo blanched instantly, unable to retake his last sentence... And awaited his next one. After a few seconds of thought, Halibel answered.

"My room, I suppose." Ichigo blushed furiously, steam more or less coming out of his ears. "It is this way."

"Man, oh man... What did I get myself into?" Ichigo screamed in his head. "I hope she's not mad that I said that... Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit ...!"

Halibel was thinking something along the lines of "What's the matter with him...? Did he develop a fever of some sort? Maybe I should let him set up the checkers board while I grab an ice pack..."

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Ichigo sat in a chair, fidgeting nervously; confusing Halibel to no end. The confused ganguro woman finally gave up waiting and decided to ask what the problem was.

"Ichigo, what's-"

"I'M SORRY!" He blurted out, interrupting her. Halibel was even more confused now... Her eloquent answer being reflected in her state of mind.

"Um... What?" She said puzzled. "What for?"

Ichigo's jaw dropped, cracking the table. Ichigo chuckled like a nervous loon after picking his mandible up off the floor and described what the problem was to the naive Halibel. She fought furiously to keep down her own blush, and started acting like a teenage girl who was about to ask out the most popular guy in her High School.

"I-I see..." She choked out. "I-I didn't realize what you had said had a secondary meaning on Earth..." Ichigo breathed out a sigh of relief, glad that she wasn't mad.

"I-I had n-no idea you thought of me in that way though..." She stammered out, scooting closer to him. Ichigo had the gentlemanly response to fall out of his chair, landing in an undignified heap on the (guess what?) white stone floor.

"I'm sorry...! Did I do something wrong? Am I unattractive?" She blurted out. Ichigo stared for a moment up at the Shark Queen, and started getting a nosebleed.

"No! Don't die again!" She shouted, grabbing the redhead in a hug, his face in her chest. Ichigo felt time stop for a moment... The feeling of Nirvana gripping his soul in the embrace of being one with the universe... Only to be shattered with one single thought.

"What would dad say about this...?" He mentally shuddered, but then realized something: "I can't breathe!"

Meanwhile, Halibel was so nervous about having "killed" the newest Espada, that she was hugging him even closer into her chest, not paying any particular attention to his flailing arms. So, Ichigo did the only thing he could do to get her attention.

*CHOMP!*

"KYAAA!"

"OH MY GOD! AIR...!" Ichigo did what most would find unthinkable... He scarred perfection! He bit a small part of the skin in the valley of the gods...! In his defense, it worked. However, it seems that he bit harder than he originally intended, as blood was flowing down her chest onto her well toned stomach. Now, when Ichigo was a HUMAN teenager, he had no real problem keeping those damn hormones under control and seeing blood run down this very very very attractive woman's torso would have no effect on him. However, since his fusion... Well...

"Oh, god! He bit me! He... Bit me...!" Halibel thought several thousand times in the span of a second. "That hurt... But it also... Ohhh, God...!"

Halibel was dragged from her thoughts rather pleasantly by an eager redhead licking the blood of her body gingerly, ravishing it with butterfly kisses, and him gently sucking on the wound. She was very confused; for multiple reasons... But she tossed rational thought out the window and went with it.

"O-Oh... God... Don't stop...!" Ichigo's response was to continue lavishing his attention on her body by placing butterfly kisses on the undersides of her glorious mounds that were exposed to the world. "A-ah! Don't... STOP!"

A pressure had built up in Halibel's lower stomach, as well as a heat even lower... Sensations that she was unfamiliar with... But DAMN did she like them...! She cried out in bliss as Ichigo continued his goddess worship, her eyes rolling into the back of her head. At last! That wonderful pressure reached it's climax, only to be increased into a massive wave of pleasure that she had never felt before.

When she had regained her mental faculties, she reached down to her folds, and to her surprise found that the whole region was drenched in a fluid that she couldn't identify. Then she became aware of who gave this wonderful experience to her.

Ichigo looked like he was about to have a heart attack... He wasn't certain what possessed him to do that, but he did, and was most likely about to get killed for it. Halibel looked at him curiously and when she looked down, noticed a tenting of Ichigo's hakama that wasn't present before. Curious, she reached over and undid the robe and revealed the strawberry's pulsing erection.

"Oh... My..." She muttered. "Did I... Do this...?"

Ichigo had a sheepish and embarrassed expression on his face, and looked away in shame. Only to gasp out when Halibel tentatively placed her finger on the shaft of his member. Emboldened by this response, Halibel ran a finger up the bottom gently, to be rewarded with a hiss from the redhead in front of her. Grinning coyly, she unbuttoned the top of her uniform, revealing the mask she had on the bottom of her face. She cracked it with her free hand slightly and experimentally opened and closed it, while shifting the teeth of the mask farther away from her own mouth.

As an afterthought, she decided to unbutton the rest of her upper uniform, revealing her breasts to her impromptu lover. Ichigo gulped audibly, to which Halibel smirked before moving her head down to his engorged cock, taking the head of it into her mouth. Ichigo was aghast at her action, but filed it under "Who cares?" after a total of 30 milliseconds and gasped in pleasure. Emboldened, she took more of it into her mouth, listening with glee at Ichigo's reactions.

The problem is, it hit the back of her throat. She couldn't fit the whole thing into her mouth, so she adjusted her neck and steeled herself for what she planned on doing next. Gagging slightly, she took more of Ichigo's member into her, at least four inches going down her throat. Ichigo was no longer able to think coherent sentences at this point. Good for him... Halibel started bobbing up and down, slowly, since she wasn't used to doing this sort of thing, and it kind of hurt her throat to do this, but she was enjoying it regardless.

After two minutes of this action, Ichigo started grunting more loudly than before, and Halibel felt his cock gaining girth, and she felt it getting stuck in her throat. She almost panicked when she felt a warm fluid gushing out of it, filling her esophagus and going directly to her stomach. It seemed that the flow would never end, and she started feeling light-headed from lack of oxygen when she got her reprieve and was finally able to dislodge the organ from inside her throat. When she pulled it out, it still gushed into her mouth and on her chest. She was surprised at the taste, and swallowed the mouthful of cum that she had, finding no sense in wasting it. Ichigo could only force out a few coherent statements, none of them he's ever spoken before.

"That... Was... Awesome..." He said. "I've never felt anything so good before..."

"I'm glad that you liked it, Ichigo-kun..." Halibel purred sensually. "I never felt anything like what you did before either..."

"I thought you were gonna kill me for that..." Ichigo admitted. Halibel cocked her head to the side curiously.

"Why would I have done that?" She asked. "I like you very much, so I would not have been against you touching me."

"Y- What? You like me?" Ichigo spewed. Halibel nodded. "Like that?"

"What do you mean, 'like that?'" She curiously asked. "I'm not very familiar with relationships, as the only ones I have had are taking care of my fracciones... As well as keeping them from driving everyone insane."

"L...Like... Sexually..." Ichigo stuttered out bashfully, looking at something interesting off to the side. "You're very pretty... And..."

"What do you mean sexually?" Halibel again asked. Ichigo could only gape at the woman now. "... You might want to close your mouth, unless you intend to catch flies."

Ichigo noticed that her mask was covering her face and wanted to try something...

"Hey, Halibel-chan, can you make that mask dissappear...? There's something I want to try..."

"I can try, but nothing may happen." She responded. Halibel closed her eyes and focused on the reiatsu around her lower face, willing it to recede. To her astonishment, it did, moving to frame her cheeks. Before she could open her eyes however, she felt a body grab hers and gently place their lips on hers. When she opened her eyes, she looked into the amber/gold irises of Ichigo.

"Halibel... I think I may love you."

AAAAAND scene!

BOOYAKASHA! That ends THAT fap-fest. I hope I did alright... It was the first time I've ever done anything like that...

Okay, I guess it's time I explain why I have Halibel so naive like that... Well, in Hueco Mundo, Hollows don't reproduce, at least not sexually or asexually. In fact, they do the opposite! NOMMA NOMMA MUVRFKR!

*ahem* So in an environment like that, the whole sexual stigma would be lost on someone like Halibel whom is normally quite stoic and mainly duty-bound, especially to her fracciones. I would expect her to be the more meditative type, while her fracciones would be comparable to gossipy, horny schoolgirls. I can't totally explain the whole thing, but whatevs. You get the gist of what I'm trying to say, right?

Anyway, time for shameless advertising! Please check out my original story, Scion's Grimoire! It can be found on my profile page under Mythology! Read and review it! PWEEEAAASSEE!

See that shiny shiny button over there? No, not the power button...! SHI-

Read and review!

~MK_Terra