Fight Fear With Fire

I GOT THREE REVIEWS! Hold your applause. Okay. I wanna talk to you guys.

To UndeadHarlot: Thank you for reviewing, my fine feathered friend. Don't have much to say besides I love you in a non creepy way. Haha

To XXforget-X-me-X-notXX: Two things for you. Numero uno, thank you, I do love cookies. Numero dos, Kyle is a gay fish. The rest is confidential. *laughs loudly to self thinking she is incredibly ninja-like with secrets*

And lastly, to Hazel-Beka: Your review made me so happy! It's not often that I get long ones, and that one made me bubbly! And I haven't eaten anything bad today, so I know it was happiness! And thank you for loving Kyle with me.

Thanks to all of you so much for reviewing! You guys are the bestest! Okay, here we are, chappy number... eight? *checks above* Yeah, it's eight. Sorry about the delay. I wanted to get my other story, Geometric Love, over with so I could concentrate all my love into this one. It's funny, cause I just wrote, "all my love," looked below, and the first thing it says is, "ur an asshole." I'm grinning to myself right now, that's just too funny. Okay, I'm shutting up now, bye bye.

Chapter Eight: Cartman Makes A Decision- Cartman has to decide his fate. It gets all the more confusing when he runs into a familar face.


SexyStan: ur an asshole

Cartman stared at the screen with a grin on his face. Who's life had he ruined this time? Kenny? Wendy? Kyle? He opened his IM window and typed a message.

KingCartman: what?

As he waited for his reply, he stared at his desk lamp. "It sure is dark in here," he whispered to himself, and the light flicked on. "Damn I'm good.

SexyStan: did u even hear about Kenny?

Oh, god. This? This is why he was an asshole. He didn't even do anything to Kenny. Nobody appreciated his ultimate prank on Kyle.

KingCartman: Ya, hes in a damn coma. So?

His mother had approached him with a giant hot fudge sundae to break the "tragic" news. Of course, he'd pretended to be upset. But this was Kenny. He'd either wake up or die and be back tomorrow. It really wasn't a big deal to him. But, if he kept up his sympathetic ploy, he could later use it to his advantage.

SexyStan: Y didn't u visit him?

God damn it! Why the hell would he travel all the way across town to Hell's Pass to visit a kid who would just sleep? Why would he want to stare at Kenny sleep? Sure, fags like Stan and Kyle might have enjoyed it, but he had his priorities set.

KingCartman: Hes sleeping and hes boring.

He could almost see the two gaywads worrying about their friend. Damn Kenny picked the perfect time to go into a coma. Right after he screwed with Kyle, all the attention goes to the blonde. Even the fucking Jew forgot about the whole essay incident.

Well, Eric Cartman would not let his powers be forgotten. He would be noticed and feared. Worshiped. Everyone would bow down to his superiority. He would show everyone…

"Stop, stop, stop!" Cartman jumped in his seat as a man he slightly recognized appeared behind him.

"Who the hell are you and why are you in my room?" he screamed, grabbing a baseball bat from behind the closet.

The man rolled his eyes and snapped his fingers, releasing memories of the conversation in the alley. "Remember me?"

"Percy, right?" Cartman asked, lowering the bat but keeping it tight in his chubby fist.

Percy nodded. "Yes. And you have got to stop thinking like that. You nearly got me in trouble."

Cartman squinted his eyes in confusion. "Thinking like what?"

"Like you're gonna tell people. Haven't you heard anything about magic? Even in your stupid human fantasy books, they always keep it a damn secret!"

"I thought you said this wasn't like Harry Potter," the large boy said testily.

Percy palmed his forehead and groaned. "Fine, there are some similarities, now shut up about that damn book series!" He regained his composure and continued. "Listen, the point is, you want to show everyone your powers. And you can't do that!"

"Why not?"

"Because, humans want everything to be easy! Internet replaces books, CDs replace records, then iPods replace them! Machines, robots, freaky mechanisms that make humans lazy and useless. If they knew that we could do anything by just waving a stick, they'd be all over us!"

Cartman groaned. "Yeah, whatever. So why are you bothering me again?"

"Look, the alarms went off saying that we were about to be exposed. I wasn't really supposed to talk to you earlier."

"Then why did you?"

Percy shrugged. "I don't know, just for the hell of it. I wiped your memory afterward, so I didn't think it mattered. I'd forgotten that you already knew about your powers before you met me."

"I'm not stupid."

"Obviously," admitted Percy, "Anyway, I need you to come with me right now."

Cartman backed away. "What? I'm not going anywhere!"

"You need to. Don't you want to learn to use your powers?"

"I can figure it out myself," Cartman said, "I'm not an idiot."

Percy crossed his arms. "You can become more powerful. You like power, right?"

"Hell yeah!"

"So, we can make you powerful. Teach you to… channel your powers. You can be a leader and take over the humans with us someday."

Cartman's eyebrow raised into his brunette hair, "Even the Jews?"

"The Jews can go first, if you like," Percy said with a sly grin, "And that's not all."

"Order now and you can receive a free magic twig!" Cartman finished, gesturing to the wand sticking out of Percy's pocket.

"Yeah, you get that too," Percy said, "But there is one thing I know you'll like."

"What?

"Cheesy Poofs," Percy replied simply, causing Cartman's excitement to deflate a bit.

He sighed. "That's it? I mean, I love Cheesy Poofs, but I expected something a bit more… magical."

Percy shrugged. "Dude. Exterminate Jews. It's a dream, right? Chase it."

Cartman had to consider for a while. If he went with Percy, he'd have all the power he wanted. He could control everyone around him, and eventually get rid of the Jew rats once and for all. But he'd be leaving his home. His mother, who gave him everything he wanted. His school, where he'd terrorized so many children. His almost friends, who had gone on so many adventures with him.

But if he stayed, he'd be abandoning his one chance to get what he always wanted. Control. Over everything. And the thought of never accomplish it was enough to make him nod slowly.

"You're in?" Percy asked.

"I… I'm in," he then remembered something, "I have to do something real fast."

He turned back to his computer and saw…

SexyStan: u r such an ass.

SexyStan: Cartman?

SexyStan: u there?

Cartman sighed and sat down.

KingCartman: Im… goin on vacation. Ill call u l8er. Tell kyle and Kenny if he wakes up. Bye.

He pressed enter and shut off his computer. "Um… one more thing." He walked to his bed and grabbed something and hid it behind his back. Percy gave him a strange look, but Cartman faced him the whole time he walked out the door.

"What did you grab?"

"Nothing," Cartman said quickly, and Percy decided not to press it. "Can I call people after I go with you?"

Percy nodded. "But the calls are monitored. To make sure you don't say anything."

"Doesn't sound like much freedom."

"You won't want people to know, Eric, trust me." Cartman just shrugged and carefully made his way down the stairs, walking backwards the whole way.

"Mom, I uh… have to go somewhere for a while. I'll call you later, okay?"

"Okay poopsiekins, I love you!"

"Love you too, Mom." Cartman rolled his eyes and walked outside. "So how are we getting out of here? Broomsticks?"

Percy chuckled. "No way. We got us a better ride." He pressed a button on his keys, causing a car to flash out of nowhere.

"Dude!" Cartman exclaimed, "A fucking Porche?"

"We wizards can afford nice things. Five finger discount."

Cartman rolled his eyes. "I don't think it counts with cars."

"Whatever, are you getting in or not?"

Cartman looked back at his house, realizing that this was his one chance to turn back if he wanted to. But he was so close, and he wouldn't just pass it up. He climbed into the back of the car. Once inside, he took what was behind his back and put it in his lap.

"I can't leave without you, Clyde Frog," he whispered, giving the toy a tiny hug and hiding it under the seat.

The car began to move, and he concentrated on the roar of the engine. He began to think that this was stupid. He'd gotten in the car with a man he didn't even know to take him somewhere that he was never told to do something he'd never done. It sounded incredibly stupid played back in his head. But the powers were real. He couldn't ignore that. The strangest thing was not the situation, but it was the powers. And the only person who understood those was Percy. Did that mean he could be trusted?

The thoughts were too much for his brain, so he changed his flow of thoughts. What would happen when he left? His mother would notice when he didn't come back for days, weeks, months. What would be his excuse? Did he finally decide to take advantage of his life and go back to fat camp? That could work, but his mother would know about that, wouldn't she? No, he could make up excuses. He was good with excuses.

Kyle would throw a party when he found out that he was gone. It would make him happy. Why hadn't he thought of that? Kyle couldn't be happy! Damn it, he was going to have to call the daywalker every day to annoy him. Ask him how he and Stan were doing.

Heh, Stan. What would Stan think? He really wouldn't care; he was too busy with Kenny's coma. Damn them and their overreacting. They weren't his friends. They made fun of him for being fat and racist and manipulative and… wait a minute.

These wizards wanted to take over the world, just like he did. They were prejudiced against humans, just like he was against Jews and blacks and almost everyone else. They wanted control and power, just like him. He would be accepted here. He wouldn't be different. Nobody would rip on him or send him to therapy or whine about their worries. Everyone was like him. This was going to be great.

Ironically, the thought occurred right when he saw a strange shadow in front of them, and a loud thump indicating that the car had hit whatever it was. Both Percy and Cartman jumped out of the car and to the front of it.

It took a while for Cartman's eyes to adjust to the darkness, but when he did, he was shocked at the sight before him. On the pavement in front of the car lay Kyle Broflovski. He didn't look seriously injured; he was just unconscious and had a few scratches.

"He just walked out in front of the car, I didn't see him," Percy muttered. "Is he dead?"

The thought hadn't occurred to Cartman and he quickly checked Kyle's pulse, which was beating normally. The moment he touched him, however, Kyle's eyes shot open. "Eric Cartman."

Cartman was slightly shocked at the usage of his full name, but answered anyway. "Yeah?"

"Make the right decision," the redhead muttered. His eyes were glazed and he didn't seem to be seeing the large boy in front of him. And his words came out in a hoarse voice.

"What's the right decision?"

"Only you know," replied Kyle in the same voice, "A war is coming, and now is the time to pick your side."

Cartman raised an eyebrow. "How do you know, Jew?" At the sudden sharp tone, Kyle blinked a few times and focused on Cartman.

"Eric?" he mumbled, and winced as the pain from the collision hit him. "Remember your life here, okay?"

Now Cartman was really confused, and it looked like Kyle was too. He was back to his normal voice and eyes, but he still didn't seem to understand what he was saying. "What d'you mean, Kahl?" he asked.

"I don't know," the Jewish boy admitted. "But remember us. Remember all the things we went through together." Kyle squinted his eyes and shook his head. "Are you leaving? Is that why I'm asking this?"

Cartman was now utterly baffled. "What the hell are you talking about Kyle?"

"Cartman, you're leaving." Cartman nodded. "I don't know what I'm saying, but my brain's telling me that it's really important for me to say this. Don't forget all the good and bad times. Don't let them take you."

"Take me where?"

Kyle groaned. "Damn it, I don't know! I just work here!"

Cartman shook his head and stood up. "Look, man, you must have had a head injury or something, but you need to get the fuck out of the road so I can leave."

Kyle hesitantly stood up and wobbled for a second before limping to the sidewalk. "Bye, I guess. Where are you going?"

"None of your business, Jew!"

"Okay," Kyle said, "Bye."

Cartman gave him his most confused face, but it didn't faze Kyle. Whatever, the Jew probably just had a bad head injury or something. He was talking crazy. He didn't respond and climbed back into the car with Percy.

"Hey Percy?" he said once the car had left South Park.

Percy grunted in response.

"When we take over the world, Kyle goes first."

"The kid we hit?"

"Yeah."

Percy shrugged. "Whatever then."


I actually kind of like this chappy. I mean, it's not that actiony or anything, but Kyle is so cute, and I just had to stick him in there. *giggles at word choice* You may have noticed that Harry Potter keeps cropping up in there. Can't help it, I love him to death. The new movie's gonna be kick ass, I watched some clips on IMDb. So... yeah.

I love the reviews! They make me so happy and cheerful and for some reason right now I have to pee. I will return momentarily. *plays elevator music*

Here I am! Sorry about that. It's okay, you guys, I washed my hands. I can't seem to shut myself up today, so I'm gonna start the next chappy. Expect the update sooner. I wanna get into this before school starts so I can have a steady thing going where I update like once a week. Is that cool for you guys? Well, it's what you're gonna deal with. Haha

Okay, so please review! I know I beg at the end of every chappy, but do it for me. For Kyle. For Stan. For Cartman. Hell, do it for Kenny, he's in a coma! Pity him! I'll kill him off this instant if you don't review! I am god! Muaahahaha! Okay, I won't kill Kenny in the next chappy even if you don't review. He's so damn cute! But his fate lies in the back of my mind. Will he live or die? What's wrong with him? Do you really care? Is that a banana?

Okay. I'm gonna shut up now, I promise. Five... Four... Three... Two...