The storm was coming down hard on the camp. I haven't left Finn's side. I kept his hand tightly in mine. We had to put a tarp over the front of the drop ship to stop the storm from getting in. We couldn't close the doors yet because Bellamy and the others aren't back yet.
"This is Raven Reyes. Calling Ark Station." Raven shouted over the rest of the delinquents, trying to contact the Ark. She had a headset on that she was talking into as she changed the frequency on the radio.
"Come in Ark Station. This is Raven Reyes." Her voice was growing more and more desperate. "Calling Ark Station. Please come in. Can anybody hear me?"
"Are you sure you have the right frequency?" Monroe asked her leaning down a bit.
"Yeah, I'm sure." Raven snapped at her harshly. Clarke rushed over to the girl.
"Raven? You can do this. Okay?" Clarke encouraged and Raven nodded slightly. Clarke walked away and went over to Finn, unwrapping the cloth that had been around the knife stuck in Finn's side. She glanced over Finn, who was looking very pale and was covered with sweat. I frowned and picked up one of my hands, I placed it shakily on his forehead. My eyes widened a bit. His temperature was incredibly high.
"What is it?" Clarke asked, panic laced in her tone. I picked my hand up and went back to holding his hand.
"He has a fever." I answered her, my voice getting choked up a bit with fear.
"Calling Ark Station. Ark station. Please come in." I hear Raven repeat herself again and again.
"I'm on the ground with the hundred." She muttered someone in audible to me and Clarke, but I assume it was a plea for help. My head dropped down and I rested my forehead on Finn's chest all hope draining out of me.
"This is a restricted station. Who is this? Please identify yourself." A voice from the radio said. My head snapped up in shock. Clarke ran over to the radio.
"This is Raven Reyes. I- I'm from Mecha Station. I'm transmitting from the ground. The hundred are alive. Please, you need to get Doctor Abby Griffin. Doctor Abby Griffin. Now." Raven says clearly in shock that she was able to contact The Ark.
"Did you hear that, Finn?" I ask him letting out a small laugh as a small smile came across my face. "We did it. We're gonna save you, I promise."
"Hang on Raven, we're trying to boost your signal." The man said and everyone had gathered around the radio at the point, except me.
"Raven? Are you there?" I hear a voice ask and I identify it to be Abby Griffon.
Clarke leaned on the desk Raven was sat at. "Mom? Mom it's me."
"Clarke?" Abby asked in shock through the radio.
"Mom, I need your help." Clarke said as her eyes flickered to Finn. "One of our people was stabbed by a Grounder."
"Clarke, this is the Chancellor. Are you saying there are survivors on the ground?" Jaha said almost in confusion.
"Yes, the Earth is survivable. We're not alone. Mom, he's dying. The knife is still in his chest." Clarke reminded her worriedly and I heard Abby asked to be patched through to medical as Clarke walked over to Finn and I.
"Clarke, is my son with you?" Jaha inquired, making Clarke freeze in her track. I knew it would be hard for her to do this so I spoke up.
"Um, I don't know if you know who I am, but my name is Bree. And I'm so sorry Chancellor but Wells is dead." I say sorrowfully and its silent on The Ark and in the drop ship.
Abby's voice was soon heard again. "I'm going to talk you through it, step by step."
I saw Clarke walk next to me and I couldn't tell if I was in her way or not. I decided to not move an inch, I wasn't leaving Finn for anything. Clarke nodded slowly, before we were thrown slightly off balanced by the wind, rocking the drop ship.
"Clarke, just find-" The end of Abby's sentence was completely muffled, making it impossible to understand.
"What?" Clarke shouted over the storm, trying to hear her mother. I twist my head towards Raven.
"Raven what's going on?" I ask her worriedly. Her eyes were frantic as her gaze shifted from me to the radio and back to me again.
"It's not the radio, it's the storm." Raven explains and I close my eyes shaking my head. Of course this would happen. Octavia walked into the drop ship, her clothes and hair soaked from the storm, she was carrying two canisters.
"Great." Clarke said with a slight smile. She took one of the canisters and inhaled it's scent, she made a disgusted face at the scent. "Monty's moonshine?"
"Pretty sure no germ could survive it." Octavia joked with a smirk on her face.
"Storm's getting worse. Monroe, close the door." Clarke orders the girl.
"We still have people out there." Monroe argues shaking her head.
"Monty and Jasper still aren't back yet. Clarke neither is Bell..." I mentioned with a worried looming on my face and she sighs.
"It's okay, they'll find somewhere to ride it out." Clarke argues and I give her a disappointed look.
"One stitching needle." Raven said interrupting us as she placed the needle in Clarke's hand.
"Great, we still need something to close the wound." Clarke said to her as she tried to think of something she can use.
"There's some wire on the second level. I used it for the tents." Octavia suggested and I nodded.
"That'll do, can you grab it for us, please?" I say, not really knowing what I'm talking about, but it's the only option we seem to have.
"Yeah." Octavia walked over to the ladder as Raven stopped her.
"Stay away from the blue wires that run through the ceiling. I rigged it to the solar cells in the roof." Raven raised her voice. "That means they're hot! You got that?"
"Yeah, I got that." Octavia said as she was about to climb up the ladder when Monroe called out to us.
"Hey! They're back!"
"Bell!" I exclaimed happily as I actually got up from my seat, slightly shocking myself. I frowned when I saw Jasper and Monty carry a familiar body in. The grounder.
"What the hell have you done?" I asked as I walked up to him in anger and shock.
"It's time to get some answers." Bellamy said trying to stay calm but I scoffed at him, taking my seat next to Finn again.
"Oh, you mean revenge?" Octavia quipped whole glaring at her brother.
"I mean 'intel'." Bell corrected her with a disapproving frown on his face.
"Get him upstairs." He ordered the two boys who dragged the grounder up the ladder.
"This isn't a good idea. Think about it Bellamy, this could do more harm than good." I said gently so that he wouldn't snap at me, he clearly wasn't stable at the moment.
"Bellamy, she's right." Clarke added, standing beside me. He gave her an angry glare and ignored me completely.
"Clarke, okay we're ready. Can you hear me?" Abby said in a crackled voice through the radio. Bellamy look surprised to hear the voice and looked at me. I let out a sigh and turned to Finn again who wasn't doing any better.
"Look, this is not who we are." Clarke whispered, her tone was low and quiet.
"Clarke?" Abby called again.
"It is now." Bellamy stated, walking away. I shook my head with disappointed.
"Okay, so the blade is at a sharp upward angle. Between the sixth and seventh rib." Clarke informed her mom as she paced up and down nervously.
"Okay, how deep?" Abby asked. This time since I was already close to the wound I leaned forward a bit.
"I don't know, a few inches probably. When I first saw the knife it wasn't very long, pretty short actually." I inform them trying to remember what the knife looks like.
"Okay, just don't remove the knife yet." Abby says and I hear feet behind me and saw Raven pacing back and forth. Clarke handed her one of the canisters of Monty's moonshine for her to sterilise her hands with, just as Clarke and I had done earlier. Raven took a large sip and then poured some on her hands. "Do you see any fluid?"
"Wha-" Clarke began, but cut herself off as she glared at the loud delinquents in the room.
"Damn it! Clear the room." She ordered Raven, who quickly nodded.
"Everyone! Upstairs! Now! Let's go!" Raven shouted and I smirked a bit at her. I felt Finn's forehead again, his temperature was still up.
"Abby, he has a fever, is that normal? I mean, it's really, really high." My worried tone caused Raven to immediately rush back to Finn's side.
"It's okay, Bree. Temperature can get rise very quickly and high after a trauma, we just need to focus on getting the knife out and then his temperature should go down." Abby explained and I nodded a bit, not fully believing her. "Okay, I need you to tell me if there is any fluid leaking from the wound."
"No." Clarke answered after checking.
Abby muttered something that we couldn't understand and then spoke clearly to us. "That's good. That's actually really good. You got lucky."
"Hear that? You're lucky." Raven whispered to Finn and I couldn't help but notice the uncomfortable look on Clarke's face. We began prepping to take the knife out. I noticed Clarke was panicking a bit.
I gave her a reassuring smile. "You can do this, you've got this. Can I help at all?"
"Just- just get out of the way Bree, you're not helping me." Clarke snaps and I'm take back by her tone and words. After a moment or two I glare at her.
"I'm not going anywhere. I may not have screwed him," I say motioning to the unconscious boy next to me. "But I damn well know him better than you ever will."
Clarke's eyes widen at my words. I almost regretted them but her saying I was just in the way once again surfaced memories that I never want to relive. I turn my attention back to Finn as I ran my fingers soothingly through his hair.
"I'm sorry." She says simply and I give her a small nod, I don't need her mind in other places while she's doing this.
"Okay," Abby's voice sounded from the radio, "firm grip on the knife. You're gonna need to angle it upward and to the left very slightly to the left as it exits the rib cage."
"How very slightly?" Clarke questioned as she held her hands up in the air, ready to pull the knife out.
"3 mi-" The sound cut out, Raven quickly turned around and walked over to the radio.
"Wait, what was that? You dropped out." Clarke asked, her voice was shaking with nerves.
"Clarke, 3 millimetres. Got it?" Abby repeated clearly.
"Yeah. Okay, I got it." She paused. "Here goes."
Raven walked over to the side of the bed next to me. I quickly grabbed her hand, not taking my eyes off Finn. Raven was like family to me on The Ark, I need to keep it that way.
"Steady hand, Clarke. You've assisted me on trickier procedures than this. And once that knife is out, the hard part is over." Abby said encouraging her daughter. I was about to speak up and ask her why she let her uneducated daughter in the medical field perform surgeries with her, but I decided this was not the time.
"Alright. Extracting now." Clarke announced. She grabbed the knife and pulled very slightly. Finn's eyes shot open as he let out a pained gasp.
"He's waking up!" Raven cried and I panicked. I squeezed his hand.
"It's okay, you're gonna be okay Finn. I'm here and I won't let anything happen to you ever again." I promise him, the words rushing out of my mouth.
"Hold him down!" Clarke shouted and Raven did her best to hold him still. "Finn, I'm gonna get that knife out of you, okay?"
"Good plan." Finn mustered out as he gasped in pain. I would've laughed if his life wasn't on the line.
"Finn, you can't move. You got it?" Clarke tells him slowly and he groans before nodding. "Okay. Here it goes."
"Nice and slow, Clarke." Abby reminded her calmingly.
"Finn, do not move." She began pulling the knife out. "Almost got it. Hold still."
Suddenly, the drop ship lurched from side to side, sending us all flying. I land in the same place I did in the cave, a shoot of pain goes through my body. I quickly shook it off and focused on Finn, who had been thrown to the floor beside, but no longer had a knife in him. He was still alive. I let out a laugh of joy as I threw my arms around him, still on the floor.
"Damnit, never do that to me again." I say and I felt him nod weakly.
"Clarke. Clarke? What's happening? Clarke, can you hear us? Clarke?" Abby asked frantically.
"It's out. She did it." Raven smiled. Clarke breathed a sigh of relief and shared a smile with Finn, which didn't go unnoticed by Raven.
Clarke cut off the remaining wire after she finished the last stitch of the wound. "Okay. I'm done."
"Good. Do you have anything to cover the wound?" Abby replied.
"We'll make do, like always." Clarke says absently.
"Should he be this pale? Warm, too?" Rave asked with a worried look.
"He's lost a lot of blood, Raven, but if your boyfriend's anywhere near as tough as you, I'm sure he'll be fine." Abby said jokingly. I felt Finn's forehead for a third time and frowned.
"No, Abby, Raven's right. He's still just as feverish as before, if not more so." I say worriedly, feeling all the relief I just had rush out of me. "And his breathing's uneven."
"Girls, you need to give him some time to recover." Abby reminded us and I sighed, shaking my head. "Let me know if he gets any worse, but I think- I think he might just be out of the woods."
"Well, down here, there's nothing but woods." Clarke muttered. "I need a break."
"Same. I'm going to check on things upstairs." I quickly climbed up to the second floor, sparing Octavia a quick smile, before going up to the third floor, where Bellamy had taken the grounder. I pushed open the hatch and climbed up, only to be stopped by Drew. "Move, now."
"Let her through." Bellamy ordered, he clearly knew I wasn't going to leave. Drew moved and I walked over to Bellamy, stopping in front of the grounder. His face was bloody and bruised, making me gore at Bellamy.
"I hardly think that was necessary." I say disapprovingly. Bellamy purposefully ignored my comment and bitter tone.
"How's Finn?" He asked me and I shrugged.
"Alive, hopefully it'll stay that way." I say remorsefully as the hatch opened again.
"Well, if he didn't hate us before, he sure does now." Clarke remarked, hopping off the ladder and making her way over to us.
Bellamy rolled his eyes at her. Who cares?"
"His people will care. How long until they figure out where he is? And what happens when they do? I mean, when they come looking for him? They will, Bellamy." Clarke says pointedly.
"Relax, Clarke." Bellamy said and I moved towards the grounder carefully.
"I'm so sorry for all of this." I whispered to him. I was vaguely aware of Bellamy giving Clarke a speech about how we were already being killed and how we were fighting a war, I chose to drown them out.
"I know you probably don't understand me, but... I'm still sorry." I sighed, wishing the grounder could understand me.
"Clarke, Bree, he's seizing!" I heard Raven's hysterical voice call out from downstairs. Clarke jumped into action.
"We're on our way!" She shouted as she ran to the hatch and climbed down. I glanced at the grounder one last time before following her down. The moment my feet touched the floor, I ran over to Finn. He shaking uncontrollably.
"He was fine, then-"
"Get my mother on the radio now." Clarke shouted at her but Raven just stared at Finn. "Raven, now!"
"The radio's dead! Interference from the storm." Raven said as she looked at Clarke.
"Clarke, I know there's not much you can do but please, don't let him die." I said shaking my head and she froze not knowing what to do for a moment before going into action. She did her best to hold him down to stop his seizing, and eventually he did.
"It stopped. Quick, help me get him on his side." Clarke ordered. We pushed him onto his side.
"There's fluid in his lungs." Clarke exclaimed as she felt his cheek. "God, he's burning up."
"Fluid in his lungs. Does that mean the knife hit something?" Raven asked.
"This isn't blood. It's something else. I did I did everything she told me." Clarke said shaking her head in confusion. "Shortness of breath. Fever. Seizing. It's poison."
Raven shook her head frantically. "But you sterilised everything. I watched you do it."
Clarke and I looked at each other, trying to find the answer when it hit us. We both turned to look at the knife.
"He poisoned it." I said quietly. Grabbing the knife, I made my way over to the hatch.
"I'm coming with you." Clarke yelled after me.
"Fine, Raven you stay with Finn." I ordered he brunette.
"Bree!" Octavia shouted as she saw me appear on the ladder. "They locked the hatch."
"Of course they did." I growled, glaring at the hatch. I started pounding on it as hard as I could.
"Bellamy, I swear to god if you don't open this hatch right now, I will make your life a living hell!" I shouted furiously and the hatch opened and I climbed up, this time being blocked by Miller.
"Get out of the way, Miller. Now!" I shouted, not in the mood for any bullshit. He reluctantly moved and I immediately ran towards the grounder.
"What's on this?" I held the knife up in front of him, Clarke right next to me.
Bellamy came up behind us. "What are you talking about?"
"He poisoned the blade. All this time, you knew Finn was gonna die no matter what we did. What is it? Is there an antidote?" Clarke shouted at him.
Octavia interrupted Clarke's interrogation. "Clarke, he doesn't understand you."
"The vials." Bellamy said, picking up a wooden box filled with vials. "It's gotta be here."
Clarke nodded in agreement as she threw the blade to the floor. "You'd have to be stupid to have a poison around this long without an antidote. Which one?"
"Answer the question!" Bellamy voice boomed. I sighed, seeing this was going nowhere. I grabbed the box from Clarke's hand and walked over to the grounder, stopping in front of him.
"Please, tell me which one is the antidote. If you don't, they'll hurt you and none of us want to hurt you. We have to save our friend. Please, he's all I have." I say swallowing a lump in my throat and the grounder just stared at me with the eye that wasn't swollen shut, unwavering.
"Show us, please." Octavia begged as she rushed to my side.
"Which one? Our friend is dying down there and you can stop that." Clarke asked him desperately.
"I'll get him to talk." Bellamy said and he walked towards the grounder. I stepped in front of him sternly.. "Move, princess."
"Bellamy, you've been up here for a while and you've already tried violence, it's clearly not working." I said pointing to the beaten up grounder. "We have to save Finn but there has to be another way."
"Bellamy, please don't." Octavia pleaded to him as she gripped his jacket.
He ripped his arm from Octavia's grip. "He wants Finn to die. Why can't you see that?" He screamed in her face.
"Do you want him to live or not?" Bellamy said while turning to me and Clarke.
"Clarke, you even said it yourself. This is not who we are! He helped fix my leg. He saved my life." Octavia said to the two of us, trying to talk some sense into Clarke.
"But now this is about Finn." I say, conflicted. I didn't want violence, I knew how it felt and it was terrible. But Finn was the one to save me from it, I can't let him die. Clarke's eyes flickered between the Blake siblings.
"Do it." Clarke says sternly and Octavia gapes at her. I stay neutral. Octavia lurched forward, but Miller and Drew caught her.
"Just tell us!" She struggled against their grip. Bellamy cut a seatbelt off of one of the chairs, put it over his shoulder, and then cut the grounder's shirt off of him.
"You're gonna show us the antidote or you're gonna wish you had." Bellamy said and my eyes widened.
"Bell, please stop this." I pleaded weakly, knowing that he wouldn't listen to me. I watched as he took the seat belt in his hands and whipped the grounder with it, making us all flinch.
I felt tears come into my eyes as I stumbled back a bit. Memories flooded my brain. All the times my father whipped me. I fell against the wall, my breathing becoming uneven.
"You worthless bitch!" My dad says whipping my harshly. I cry out in pain and fall to the floor. Ripples of pain that could not even be described soared through my back.
"Father I'm sorry!" I shout but he ignores me, mercilessly whipping me.
"You're useless! Worthless! All you ever do is get in the damn way!" He shouts, bringing his hand-made whip down even harder.
"Please! I'm sorry I didn't mean to talk to that girl!" I shout at him, lying. It was Raven I was talking to. I couldn't let him know that though. He continued whipping me, enjoying it as he watched me bleed all of the carpet.
"Dad, I'm sorry!" I shout out, not realizing I was in a flashback. Everyone's head snapped towards me with wide eyes. Bellamy stared at me still holding the seat belt. He must've just realized that I was having a flashback. Octavia did as well but she immediately rushed to my side.
"Bree? Bree, hey. It's okay. Whatever you're seeing, it's not real anymore. He can't hurt you anymore." Octavia says sternly to me and I just rested my head on the wall, trying not to sob.
"Then why is he still here?" I ask her as I bring a hand up to my head. She sighs and wraps her arms around me.
Clarke ran over to the grounder and kneeled in front of him, laying out all of the vials. "Please, which one's the antidote?"
"Just tell them." Octavia said from next to me. Again the grounder remained silent, so Bellamy placed a hand on Clarke's shoulder to grab her attention.
"Clarke." She let her drop and move out of the way. Bellamy proceeded to whip the grounder again. I let out a strangled sob as I try to push my memories away. I curled up in a ball and put my hands over my ears.
"They won't stop, O." I cry out and Octavia stares at me not knowing what to do. She knows this is absolute hell for me.
"Enough!" Octavia cried out loudly, desperate to help me and the grounder.
"You guys! He's getting worse!" Raven's voice roared from the bottom floor and Clarke sighed.
"We're running out of time." Clarke kneeled in front of the grounder again, begging him. "Which one? Which one is it? Please, if you tell us which is the antidote, they'll stop this."
"Please, please tell them." I say to the grounder, still on the ground. He spares me a look, almost one of sorrow before going back to his harsh exterior.
"Is it this one?" Clarke asked, pointing at the vial on the left. Still nothing. Clarke stood up. She was getting incredibly desperate. I heard a small thud and I looked up, Bellamy had thrown the seatbelt away.
"If that doesn't work, maybe this will." Bellamy said and I looked at his hand and saw a big, metal screw.
"Clarke, do you want to leave?" He offered and she shook her head furiously.
"I'm not leaving until I get that antidote." Clarke refused to leave. She turned around as Bellamy walked over to the grounder, pulling his arm back.
"Bree, you don't have to be here for this, you can leave." Bellamy says, knowing how this was effecting me.
"No." I said stubbornly. I was worried that Bellamy would do even worse if I wasn't here.
"Last chance." He warned the grounder, who gave no response. Bellamy pushed his arm forward and pierced the nail into the grounder's hand. I looked back as I heard muffled, pained moans and saw the grounder's hand shaking violently, the nail still lodged in his hand.
I let out a pained gasp, desperate to not to let the memories of my father hurting me in my mind. I held my head and rested it on my knees, trying to block out what was happening.
"What's taking so long?" Raven demanded, climbing up the ladder. "He stopped breathing."
"What?" Clarke shrieked in shock.
"He started again, but next time, he might not." Raven added nervously.
"He won't tell us anything." Clarke explains and Raven snapped her head to the side, snarling at the grounder.
"Wanna bet?" She asked as she marched over to the wires, plucking out the blue ones that she had previously told Octavia to stay away from.
"What are you doing?" Bellamy queried, cautiously and wearily.
"Showing him something new." She rubbed the ends of the wires together, creating sparks, getting closer to the grounder. He moved away, letting out shocked grunts. She latched the wires onto his skin, electrocuting him. The grounder's scream sounded out as the lights flickered. She pulled them away. "Which one is it? Come on!" When he refused to answer, she shocked him again. He still didn't listen, so she pulled the wires away and screamed at him. "He's all I have."
"No more!" Octavia's voice screeched, there were tears in her eyes. I was so intrenched in what was going on I hadn't noticed her leave. I saw something glimmer in her hands and realized what she was doing.
"He's letting Finn die." Bellamy argued.
"Octavia, wait!" I tried to stop her.
"He won't let me die." Octavia said harshly before she sliced her arm with the knife.
"Octavia, what the did you-" Bellamy said reaching out for her as she passed him, but she avoided his grip.
Octavia knelt in front of the grounder and looked up at him, showing him the cut. "Please, tell me which one."
"Is it this one?" She asked, pointing at the one in the middle. The grounder shook his head at her. I got up from the wall and walked over to them quickly. I got on the ground next to Octavia.
"Okay, how about this one?" I asked, grabbing one with a yellow liquid inside of it. He nodded.
"Okay, good. Here." I gave it to Clarke, who said thank you and quickly ran off with it.
"O-" Bellamy placed his hands on her shoulder to help her up, but she pushed herself away from him.
"Don't touch me." She hissed and Bellamy looked hurt.
"Hey O, go downstairs and get the antidote from Clarke. I'll clean his wounds." I told her and her eyes flickered between Bellamy and me.
"Okay." She said simply before leaving. I had to leave for a few moments to get some clean water and a cloth. I made sure to be as quick as I could.
As soon as I got back, Bellamy came over to me. "Princess, I-"
"Don't." I said shaking my head at him.
"Bree whatever you saw, it wasn't real." He reassured me and I just looked at him sadly.
"But this was real. Bellamy when you were- were whipping him. I didn't see you anymore. I saw my father. It brought me back to terrible memories. The worst part was, you didn't stop. Neither did he." I told him sorrowfully.
"Just go, Bellamy. Miller's here, I'll be fine." I said calmly as I made my way over to the grounder, setting the water down on the floor and soaking the cloth in it. I heard Bellamy sigh and mutter to Miller before leaving the room.
"I'm really sorry, but I need to remove this." I said looking at the nail so he understood me. He nodded. I gulped as I grabbed the nail and pulled it out, not missing the quiet grunt from the grounder.
"Sorry!" I explained as I set down the nail beside the bowl, I grabbed the wash cloth and began gently wiping away the blood.
"Hey." Someone said softly. It was Octavia. "Can I take over?"
"Sure." I gave her the cloth and stood back.
The weather had finally cleared up and everyone was trying to clean the camp. I sighed and leaned against a tree, observing the damage. Bellamy hesitantly walked over to me. I kept my eyes trained on him, remaining silent. He propped himself against the tree, arms folded across his chest as he watched everyone. I had yet to say a word to Bellamy since telling him to leave. I knew I should feel uncomfortable but I didn't.
"Please, tell me what's going on in that beautiful head of yours." I heard Bellamy say quietly.
"I don't know what to say." I tell him honestly and he nods a bit at me, encouraging me to go on. "You know that my dad use to whip me. But you did it anyway, you must've known it would effect me somehow."
"I never wanted to hurt you, Bree. Never like that or in anyway." Bellamy says and I shake my head.
"Do you know what it feels like, to be whipped?" I ask him, already knowing the answer. He shakes his head at me. "It feels like a million knives being sent into your body all at once. Repeatedly. The worse part isn't even the physical pain, it's the emotional pain. It leaves gashes and scars all over you, constantly reminding you about what happened. Every time the whip cracks down on you, a piece of you is taken away. A part of your spirit, I guess. It was the worse pain my father has ever done to me. And it still haunts me two years later." I tell him angrily and he stares at me sadly.
"I'm so sorry, Bree. I knew that Finn was the one to protect you from him. If I let him die, then I wasn't sure what would happen to you. All I've wanted to do is-" Bellamy explains but I finish his sentence.
"Protect me. I know." I say, trying my best not to give in. "Did you even feel bad, for the grounder as you tortured him?"
Bellamy sighed and looked down. "Bree down here... We sometimes need to follow our heads, not our hearts. What we do to survive and who we are, are two very different things. They have to be."
I stared into his eyes, I truly saw that he was sorry. He stares into my eyes before he shifts a bit, cupping my face in his gingerly. He leans forward a bit but I turn my head away, closing my eyes.
"I can't be that girl, Bell." I say sorrowfully and he gives me a confused look. "I can't be that girl who constantly forgives the person she-" I said getting caught in my words. Did I almost just say loves?
"I can't be that girl who forgives a guy she may or may not have feelings for. Feelings that she desperately wants to push away but for some reason, she feels drawn to him. She can't seem to not forgive him every time he messes up." I say angry towards myself. I sigh before standing up. I look at him sadly before I begin to walk away.
"Bree!" Bellamy says standing up. He grabs my arm and I flinch. I turn around and I see him staring sadly at me. I've never flinched when he's touched me before. I never thought I would. He looks at me in shock and pure sadness.
"I'm sorry." I whisper before walking away from him.
Just so you know, the reasons these chapters are going up so quickly is because I already wrote them on wattpad, once we catch up to where I am on that they won't be every day.
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