AN: This chapter we are going to take a break from being arrogant and obnoxious to do some shameless self promotion. Do you find it hard to sleep at night for wondering WHICH RESIDENT EVIL: LIVING LIKE A DISASTER CHARACTER ARE YOU? Well in that case we have the answer to your prayers. The Living Like A Disaster quizilla quiz. You can get the link from our bio, or failing that our username on Quizilla is Shakandclaudia. Let us know what you got.

We hope you enjoy Chapter 8. Thanks to all who reviewed, you have earned your place in the Lord's kingdom.

Shak and Claudia

Dr Albert Wesker

Watching the young scientist in action was nothing short of a travesty to Albert Wesker as matter escalated, causing him yet more vexation. Dealing within in the bioweapons industry had always been a tedious practice, but he had consistently demanded the best from his employees. However, what Claudia was currently delivering fell criminally far short of this. Within less than five minutes she had achieved the spectacular feat of aggravating the STARS captain to the point where she had not only had herself put in handcuffs but actually managed to rile Shakahnna into almost shooting her.

It was strange, but Wesker found this idea oddly arousing. The thought of watching the redhead slaughter his hapless employee gave him an odd sense of grim satisfaction. It had always been infinitely alluring to watch her brutality in action, but this particular kill held a pecuilar fascination. However, when the party split up it was an easy decision. As she radioed her beloved team, the thrill of standing unseen, barely a few feet away from him, undoubtedly confirmed his suspicions that, no matter how incompetent Claudia may have been, the outcome of this day's events would hold infinite possibilities for enjoyment. He almost snarled in feral impatience as she looked around, clearly aware that something in her surroundings was not quite kosher, but not able to quite discern his presence. Even while talking to her subordinates, her alert green eyes scanned the vicinity for the source of her discomfort.

It was during this interlude, while Shak relayed her orders, he became aware of her intentions to take a trip up to the laboratories herself. He supposed for the moment that was where his attentions must be focused. Were she to reach Lancasters work before he did, he felt certain that she would not possess the same reverence for science that his operative did.

Since your current company cannot fulfill that delectable bloodlust of yours, perhaps I will leave you a parting toy to occupy you.

There was just one small matter he needed to attend to

Shakahnna and Claudia

"Fuck you! You are not going to the labs!"

"But I HAVE to!"

"Shut up or you know the rest. You've already used all your three chances!"

"My boss'll..."

Kill you horribly?

Shakahnna raised an eyebrow at her with a look of complete unmoving stubbornness which Claudia answered with a livid glare. The teenage scientist was too lost in her own rage to hear the patter of clawed feet and the deep, low growl emanating from behind her. The sound was very quiet, but it did not take Shakahnna long to snap her head up, followed shortly afterward by Pierce. The redhead's hand shot forward, clenching the front of Claudia's dress in her fist. For a moment the OCRC operative flinched, thinking that she had riled Shakahnna into punching her, when she found herself thrown back in the direction of Pierce. As two hulking, reptillian forms came into view, things became a lot clearer to Claudia.

"Pierce, take care of that. You're on babysitting duty," the STARS captain ordered, sticking her tongue out over her shoulder before rounding on the two monsters.

The first of the pair approached, and she felt her stomach tighten with the first hints of excitement. As it swiped a set of enormous claws, aiming to decapitate her, she dropped onto her right arm and rolled over, withdrawing the two handguns at her side as she raised herself up on one knee. Leveling her weapons at her assailant, she fired three shots from each barrel, sending the creature hurtling back against the wall. As she heard it shriek, a warm sensation spread through her torso as she watched the blood trickle from the entry wounds on its hide, a sight which wrought the vivification of her libido.

She could hear its partner running towards her and whirled to face it, re-holstering her pistols. The monster came in low, hulking shoulders hunched ferally, and as it neared its prey, one thick scaled arm came towards her. Shakahnna instantly sprung into the air, her jump propelling her above the sweep of the hunter's talons, and she clicked her heels together in mid air; a gesture of euphoria which also served to activate the blades in her heels. As her broad form came crashing down on the monster's arm, the sharp steel tore through its armoured flesh, ripping its hand clean off. Reaching down with her left hand, she threw the severed appendage in its face with a sneer of "Fuck you!" before punching it square in the jaw with her right. "So...um...she's mental..." Claudia Graham had never been very good at smalltalk, and today was no exception. Pierce looked down at her, scowling by way of ordering her to shut up.

It's not fair. It's not fair. I just want to go to the....ohmygod what was that noise?!

The young doctor's thoughts were interrupted with a loud, orgasmic groan swiftly followed with a shout of "You like that, bitch!" Claudia pursed her lips in disapproval before turning to Pierce, opening her mouth, and then simply closing it again.

It's going to be one of those days...

Claudia was oblivious as, in what could not have been more than an instant, her environment changed. There was a blur of motion from the corner of her eye, and she looked up to find her boss holding the struggling Pierce by the lower half of his jaw, one enormous hand covering his mouth. She jumped back and let out a tiny squeak, before wordlessly giving him a nervous little wave.

"Um...hullo," she faltered, before adding hastily, "...sir." At this Pierce's eyes widened indignantly as he glared at the spy.

"Good afternoon, Miss Graham. It appears this young man was causing you some vexation," he tutted languidly at Officer Fischer, "That really is manners most unbecoming of a gentleman."

Claudia nodded wordlessly, kicking the sole of her shoe against the ground and staring at her feet. "Said I couldn't go to the labs," she mumbled sullenly under her breath.

Wesker opened his mouth to speak, but even he faltered as the noises from Shakahnna's scuffle with the Hunters floated around the corner. A tuneless voice was singing at the top of her lungs with blithe gusto, "That's the way...uhuh uhuh...I liiiiike it...uhuh uhuh...." over the sound of metal crunching into flesh. Dr Graham looked at Wesker in complete horror as the song came to an enthusiastic finale which apparently heralded the expiration of one of his creations.

"How droll." It did not take the unflappable Albert Wesker long to regain his composure, "As much as I would enjoy prolonging our meeting, I am afraid time is of the essence. As such I believe I have a solution to your current dillema." His frosty demeanour contrasted with his almost fatherly concern of their last meeting; there was an underlying intensity which made Claudia rack her brains for anything she might have done wrong, and failed for the moment to come up with any conceivable reason why she may not have been the world's greatest espionne.

"Are you going to kill him?" she asked with a bright hopefulness.

Wesker eyed her levelly, "It would be wholly more fitting were that task to fall to you."

This is great, now he'll be out of my way. And then all I have to do is deal with...uh oh.

"N...no, really sir. I'd rather not," she faltered, wrinkling her nose and trying desperately to appear casual about the matter, but unsurprisingly failing, "And, um, besides...I can't fight."

Your inutility beggars belief...

He gritted his teeth impatiently. "Miss Graham, it may have escaped your notice, but you are currently in possession of a firearm." His voice did not contain the harsh sentiment that he was currently wishing upon the doctor. Wesker was, however, far more interested in the long term anguish her continued existence would cause than the appeal of terminating Claudia's employment at that moment. His thoughts were cut short as Pierce let loose a particularly violent struggle, and he tightened his muscles a fraction of an inch to stay the officer, almost disappointed at the ease of the gesture.

"Oh..." Claudia looked down at the weapon protruding clumsily from her side pocket and blinked, "So I do." Still, the idea was not one which pleased the young girl, so she decided to try stalling. "But...um...what if I miss?"

Like that rather unfortunate accident with...

"Miss Graham, I grow impatient."

The bespectacled girl blanched, "Ah...um...yes, quite." She aimed the gun as best she could, hoping that the close range would cancel out her abysmal marksmanship, screwed her eyes shut tightly and pulled the trigger, jumping in fright as the shot went off. Pierce slumped in Wesker's grasp, his dead eyes perfect circles of horror, his pupils dilated in fear. Had his mouth not been covered by the other man's hand, it would have gaped, a silent scream trapped in his throat as the bullet ripped through it. A crimson flower began to blossom across his clavicle as the sticky fluid seeped down his uniform. His body tensed with a shudder before going limp.

Wesker let him fall softly to the ground, barely affording the cadaver a glance as Claudia watched in fascination. "Well, Miss Graham," he offered her a genial smirk, "I'm sure you remember our arrangements. I'll leave this in your capable hands."

And with that he was gone.

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